What Every Parent Should Know About School

by Michael Reist

School is our children's second home. They will spend more time there than anywhere else in their formative years. We all need to talk honestly about the nature of this environment, how it works, and how it doesn't work. Our kids are depending on us to create a school system where they can learn as well as feel happy. The more we know about how school works, the better we will be able to navigate our way through "the system" and help our children do the same. What Every Parent Should Know About School is an honest, positive, thought-provoking look at what schools are today and what they could be in the future.

Genres: Parenting

308 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2013

About the author

Michael Reist is a nationally-recognized authority on the needs of children. He is the author of the Canadian bestseller Raising Boys In A New Kind Of World as well as What Every Parent Should Know About School and The Dysfunctional School: Uncomfortable Truths and Awkward Insights on School, Learning and Teaching.

His most recent book is entitled Raising Emotionally Healthy Boys.

He has published over 90 articles on topics ranging from education, spirituality and parenting to movies, books and popular culture.

Michael’s work has been featured on CBC Television and Radio, Global TV, CityTV, TV Ontario, Today’s Parent Magazine, The Globe and Mail, The National Post and the Toronto Star.

He is a frequent speaker to parent groups and conferences across Canada where his workshops on how boys and girls learn differently and the influence of technology on kids have drawn large crowds and enthusiastic responses.

A classroom teacher for over thirty years, Michael now works in private practice where he is a mentor to countless young people and their parents.

Reviews

[Kash Al · Rating 4 out of 5]

A thought-provoking read presented by a teacher that has years of experience in the classroom. The author provides many flaws on the school system and the consequences it can have on our children. The current school system is built as a factory and dumbed down to provide a uniform experience for all children, even though the reality is that every child has different needs. The author provides how schools of the futures could solve some of these challenges and put more choice towards the students. However it is hard to read this book, as there is not much an individual parent can do to change the system. The flaws that the author points out with school are real, but unfortunately I have no choice but to put my kids through it as the future schools the author envisions will not be in my lifetime. That said though the author does present some great practical advice for parents. Just being aware of some of the flaws should lead us to have open and honest communications with children so they are aware also. He also provided great advice on how to deal with common issues such as poor report cards, bullying, empathizing with children, and communicating with your children's educators to name a few. This is must read for any parent that has children in the public school system, as awareness of school may be limiting some children is the first step in helping your child overcome those challenges

[Hilary · Rating 4 out of 5]

This took me a while to read because I found it very thought-provoking. I can see myself re-reading this as my child gets closer to school age, and again when he's been in school for a while.

It first puts the current US school system in context by explaining the history behind the factory-style education system and prison-inspired school buildings; it includes the benefits and drawbacks, the problematic characteristics for children, and how some changes can be made. Unfortunately, as with most things of value, there are no quick fixes here but parental awareness of each child's strengths and weaknesses, and parental participation in school - frequent, open communication with the teacher and involvement in school activities - can mitigate many of these issues.

Reist also discusses the differences in personalities (rulebound, free spirit, sensitive, introvert, extrovert) and how they affect the child/parent/teacher relationship, and readiness: that a child is not "slow" or "gifted" just because he or she is currently in front of or behind the peer group, but that there is natural variance and we should allow for that, rather than trying to force all children to develop at the same pace. I know many who can testify to the problems this causes: children currently ahead of the curve get bored and may become disruptive because they understand the topic more quickly, children behind the curve get frustrated, lose interest and may become disruptive because they are falling behind and see no hope for catching up, and only the students in the middle feel they are doing well.

He offers good strategies for dealing with some problematic issues, and wording for talking about others, including bullying, cuing for impulse control, short attention spans, discussing grades and promoting open communication with all children.

I can't see Reist's "school of the future" coming any time soon, except as a private or experimental academy. I felt parts of his school criticism was flawed, because most are limited by finances and space and unable to provide a more Socratic method of teaching; it's true that conformity isn't bad, it just shouldn't be the target.

That said, many of the concepts he says are lacking are those promoted by the free-range kids movement: allow children to make their own decisions and learn from the consequences, let them learn independence and self-reliance, and adults should be aware of the true dangers (losing social interactions which teach things like taking turns, or working as a group, or allowing an adult to comfort or support a child) rather than expecting the worst-case scenario at every turn.

Schools are not factories, endlessly churning out new workers with identical skills and qualifications. They should be places for children to find and develop their skills, wherever they fall in the range from practical to intellectual, and to get some sense of the available paths. Reist shows the flaws in the current US school system, and offers ways that, even now, we can help our children become more resilient and independent adults.

[Sarah Daigen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a really important book to read as a teacher - which isn't to say I agree with everything Michael Reist says. I think he focuses a bit too much on sex/gender as causes for educational struggles, and - perhaps I'm just too much a product of the 'factory school system' but - I have a hard time going quite so far as he does in dismissing certain core subject areas that "everyone should learn". BUT he raises some truly important points about how school could be made more comfortable for all, from age-mixing to greater choice/specialization, possibly earlier (recognizing that say, perhaps someone going into engineering doesn't need an A in gr. 12 Pre-U English to accomplish their goals?), and emphasizing the value of all interests and intelligences, not just the linguistic and mathematical ones emphasized so often by our current school system. Most importantly, he points out the natural curiosity of children, and the importance not to compel and push them - students can go far based on their interests and natural aptitudes, forced courses of study can do more harm than good, and we need to look at learning as something, in one way or another, children WANT, not something they need to be forced into. Bottom line - might not be the educational philosophy for everyone (although in some ways, that is exactly the point - that no educational philosophy works for everyone), but an accessible read creating some very valuable food for thought.

[Nick Turner · Rating 4 out of 5]

Honest and thought-provoking analysis of schooling in the U.S. with concerns relevant to most countries with mass schooling. Written in everyday language with intuitive from-the-child arguments. The author emphasises how strange the school environment is e.g. sitting still for hours just doesn't fit some children.

Learning foreign languages is easier for young children than for teenagers or adults. The benefits of exposure to another culture (especially for children from parochial families who never socialise outside their own narrow ethnic interests or never go abroad) are difficult to obtain from other subjects. In the United Kingdom, when foreign languages were made optional, schools rushed to drop them and take up has declined massively in a victory for short-term thinking. In the vacuum religious languages are being taught more often, promoting fundamentalism.

Test (easy questions for parents and teachers to understand children), index and bibliography (with prices) at the end. I read a review copy from the publisher.

[Tzippy]

My oldest is starting first grade in a month and a half. I'm terrified.

Hope this book doesn't give lots of bad advice!