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With the Light: Raising an Autistic Child #6
With the Light: Raising an Autistic Child
For Sachiko ANd Masato, it seems like only yesterday that their children, Hikaru and Kanon, were little. But these days, Kanon is about to start elementary school, while Hikaru is getting out into society and going to junior high by bus. However, in the outside world, some of Hikaru's insistences that were acceptable when he was younger are not so anymore. When one such habit creates chaos during the morning commute, Sachiko has to find a way to clear up a serious misunderstanding with hikaru's fellow commuters and take steps to curb any behavior that might stand in the way of Hikaru living in the world as "a cheerful, working adult. " Furthermore, dealing with the negative perceptions that others including her mother—in—law have about Hikaru begins to take its toll on Sachiko, especially with Masato occupied at work. Will the stres of facing new challenges presented by Hikaru's autism drive a rift between the two?
528 pages, Paperback
Published March 23, 2010
2 people are currently reading
167 people want to read
About the author
Keiko Tobe
24 books38 followersKeiko Tobe (1957-January 28, 2010) was a mangaka who wrote primarily josei manga. She was best known for creating With the Light, which won an Excellence Prize in the Japan Media Arts Festival Awards in 2004 from the Japanese Agency for Cultural Affairs and inspired a television drama.
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Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews
February 25, 2014
I wish this writer was still alive. She had such insight about autism and autistic people and practical ways to help instead of just wringing ones hands going OMG MY CHILD IS AUTISTIC SUCH DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM.
July 27, 2020
Such an excellent manga, even if it will never catch on with its target audience (mothers) and is out of place with the typical manga reader (teenagers).
September 28, 2014
This volume touches on some more complex issues than previous ones. In addition to trying to help her autistic son Hikaru move forwards in life, Sachiko deals with her own mother's failing health, her younger child's illness, and concerns about her husband's fidelity.
Her concerns about Hikaru are becoming more nuanced as well. He is now a junior high student, still mostly nonverbal. While he is comfortable following routines and written instructions, his social misunderstandings still give rise to problems. When he strokes the hair of a strange woman on the bus, she assumes he is sexually harassing her. In response, Sachiko works to find ways to make it easier for Hikaru to remember and follow social rules. One thing I like is that she attaches a silky fabric band to his book-bag for him to touch while on the bus, to give him an alternative to hair-stroking that is still enjoyable for him.
In discussing this incident with another parent who has similar concerns, something came up that made me think a lot. The other young man being discussed touches his teachers inappropriately, and they treat his actions as cute and humorous. So when his mother has to stop him from touching a salesgirl's chest, the boy is baffled and hurt that he's suddenly being punished for something that is usually accepted. Both mothers agree that it's best to establish behavioral rules (like not being naked in front of the other gender) at as early an age as possible to avoid confusing kids who rely on routine by having the rules change for them as they approach puberty.
In some ways, I see the advantage to this. In other ways, I sympathize with the special education teachers who don't want to punish the boy for actions that are done entirely innocently. I'm also torn between knowing that routines are helpful and feeling that it insults an autistic child's intelligence to assume that they can't learn that different actions are appropriate in different contexts.
In earlier volumes, Hikaru was described as simply "autistic." Eventually, this is amended to "autistic and has learning disabilities." I'm not sure if the change is because the two are not considered synonymous in Japanese culture, or because the author wants to highlight the fact that not all of Hikaru's difficulties are shared by all autistic people. I've never really been able to get a clear picture of Hikaru's general level of intelligence, but it does bother me that his parents are putting him on the track to doing relatively menial work as a career choice. However, they do work from the assumption that he will become a working adult, albeit living with support-- and this is rarely taken for granted for disabled people in America.
One thing I did love in this volume is that, when Sachiko's mother-in-law asks "What happens to children like him from now on?" She answers simply and firmly "He'll grow up just as he should. And he'll become a young man with autism." (p 40, episode 1).
Helpful tips from this volume:
- a light-weight, foldable partition (like a little folding screen) can be placed on a desk or table to give an autistic person the feeling of having their own space to eat or do work in a crowded room. The model shown here will fit in a backpack or briefcase. You can post notes on it, too!
- for children who climb onto dangerous places in the home, a prickly surface on those places is an excellent reminder not to climb (they use the reverse side of fake grass as a good example). It also works to keep birds and cats off balcony railings!
In the end-notes, Hariko Inuoe, grandmother to an autistic adult, writes "Don't scold children for what you used to be like. Don't laugh at old people for what you will become." (p 514)
Her concerns about Hikaru are becoming more nuanced as well. He is now a junior high student, still mostly nonverbal. While he is comfortable following routines and written instructions, his social misunderstandings still give rise to problems. When he strokes the hair of a strange woman on the bus, she assumes he is sexually harassing her. In response, Sachiko works to find ways to make it easier for Hikaru to remember and follow social rules. One thing I like is that she attaches a silky fabric band to his book-bag for him to touch while on the bus, to give him an alternative to hair-stroking that is still enjoyable for him.
In discussing this incident with another parent who has similar concerns, something came up that made me think a lot. The other young man being discussed touches his teachers inappropriately, and they treat his actions as cute and humorous. So when his mother has to stop him from touching a salesgirl's chest, the boy is baffled and hurt that he's suddenly being punished for something that is usually accepted. Both mothers agree that it's best to establish behavioral rules (like not being naked in front of the other gender) at as early an age as possible to avoid confusing kids who rely on routine by having the rules change for them as they approach puberty.
In some ways, I see the advantage to this. In other ways, I sympathize with the special education teachers who don't want to punish the boy for actions that are done entirely innocently. I'm also torn between knowing that routines are helpful and feeling that it insults an autistic child's intelligence to assume that they can't learn that different actions are appropriate in different contexts.
In earlier volumes, Hikaru was described as simply "autistic." Eventually, this is amended to "autistic and has learning disabilities." I'm not sure if the change is because the two are not considered synonymous in Japanese culture, or because the author wants to highlight the fact that not all of Hikaru's difficulties are shared by all autistic people. I've never really been able to get a clear picture of Hikaru's general level of intelligence, but it does bother me that his parents are putting him on the track to doing relatively menial work as a career choice. However, they do work from the assumption that he will become a working adult, albeit living with support-- and this is rarely taken for granted for disabled people in America.
One thing I did love in this volume is that, when Sachiko's mother-in-law asks "What happens to children like him from now on?" She answers simply and firmly "He'll grow up just as he should. And he'll become a young man with autism." (p 40, episode 1).
Helpful tips from this volume:
- a light-weight, foldable partition (like a little folding screen) can be placed on a desk or table to give an autistic person the feeling of having their own space to eat or do work in a crowded room. The model shown here will fit in a backpack or briefcase. You can post notes on it, too!
- for children who climb onto dangerous places in the home, a prickly surface on those places is an excellent reminder not to climb (they use the reverse side of fake grass as a good example). It also works to keep birds and cats off balcony railings!
In the end-notes, Hariko Inuoe, grandmother to an autistic adult, writes "Don't scold children for what you used to be like. Don't laugh at old people for what you will become." (p 514)
April 28, 2011
yes, this is actually a review for a book talk. please ignore the Kamichama Karin reviews, they were done years ago and I just needed to make necessary changes to the review.
As the synopsis states, With the Light is a book about the life of a mother raising a high schooler with autism. Hearing that, it sounds like the most boring and mundane graphic novel ever written, but this is where the reason I love this book comes in: It makes this bland topic so fun to read about. For the characters are all very well written, and even Hikaru, the autistic high schooler, has both good and hateful traits, that makes all the characters so much more human than in many other books I've recently read. They all also face more real and relateble side conflicts, such as people worrying about whether or not their son will fit in, or about there job, and friends, and making it comical and enjoyable the whole way, instead of depressing and serious, the way many books of this sort, such as my sister's keeper, come off. Not only that, but this story focuses on a multitude of characters,and really gives a very non-biased view on how autism and other brain defects affect not only families, but society as well. It takes much more writing skill to take the everyday stories and make them more enjoyable, and also not a total depress-fest, and this author pulls it off nearly flawlessly. The only problems this book really has is the slow pacing, and there are scenes where the book feels like its trying to hard to be funny; But there are honestly only minor gripes for a great book. So graphic novel fans, or people who want to read non-depressing realistic fiction, pick up this book, it will instantly become a favorite.
As the synopsis states, With the Light is a book about the life of a mother raising a high schooler with autism. Hearing that, it sounds like the most boring and mundane graphic novel ever written, but this is where the reason I love this book comes in: It makes this bland topic so fun to read about. For the characters are all very well written, and even Hikaru, the autistic high schooler, has both good and hateful traits, that makes all the characters so much more human than in many other books I've recently read. They all also face more real and relateble side conflicts, such as people worrying about whether or not their son will fit in, or about there job, and friends, and making it comical and enjoyable the whole way, instead of depressing and serious, the way many books of this sort, such as my sister's keeper, come off. Not only that, but this story focuses on a multitude of characters,and really gives a very non-biased view on how autism and other brain defects affect not only families, but society as well. It takes much more writing skill to take the everyday stories and make them more enjoyable, and also not a total depress-fest, and this author pulls it off nearly flawlessly. The only problems this book really has is the slow pacing, and there are scenes where the book feels like its trying to hard to be funny; But there are honestly only minor gripes for a great book. So graphic novel fans, or people who want to read non-depressing realistic fiction, pick up this book, it will instantly become a favorite.
September 12, 2012
Come meet Hikaru Azuma a young autistic boy in Japan with possibly the worlds greatest mother. Join him as he makes the journey to become a 'happy working adult'.
Now in junior high Hikaru is learning to ride the bus, but a fascination with women's hair might prove to make that difficult. Also a cute aide at Masato's work has a crush on him, will this lead to problems in the Azuma household?
We get to have another little peak at Oota-san and Kanata-kun and their possible relationship. I love how Tobe brings back 'background' characters and makes you care so much about them. I'm also loving how you can see that Sachiko is aging (it's not dramatic, but you can see it none-the-less) which makes sense since she's aged some 13 odd years since the start of the series.
I've said it before, but I love everything about these books, art, story, characters, it's all fantastic.
If you look on page 446, Tobe is talking about noise-cancelling headphones and does a drawn-on page upturn she's included a picture of herself working on a manga wearing them.
I recommend this series to lovers of manga, those who wish to try out manga and want to be sure they start with the good stuff and anyone curious as to the story of life with an autistic child.
Now in junior high Hikaru is learning to ride the bus, but a fascination with women's hair might prove to make that difficult. Also a cute aide at Masato's work has a crush on him, will this lead to problems in the Azuma household?
We get to have another little peak at Oota-san and Kanata-kun and their possible relationship. I love how Tobe brings back 'background' characters and makes you care so much about them. I'm also loving how you can see that Sachiko is aging (it's not dramatic, but you can see it none-the-less) which makes sense since she's aged some 13 odd years since the start of the series.
I've said it before, but I love everything about these books, art, story, characters, it's all fantastic.
If you look on page 446, Tobe is talking about noise-cancelling headphones and does a drawn-on page upturn she's included a picture of herself working on a manga wearing them.
I recommend this series to lovers of manga, those who wish to try out manga and want to be sure they start with the good stuff and anyone curious as to the story of life with an autistic child.
October 21, 2018
If these China people fed their kids right and stopped sticking their heads under water then their genetics would be more straightened out, I tell ya. I know about these things. Not because of my kid, but because I read a lot. I get headaches I read so much. I'm bursting with information. In meetings I interrupt that coke-fiend Ryan and that Frankenstein looking Pence to shell out some pretty important information, and I tell you, they're fuckin' floored. They just look at me with their mouths open, they can't believe how smart I am. They'd be doomed without me. They'd be fuckin' doomed.
January 1, 2019
Another chapter in the life of Hikaru and his family, With the Light #6 follows Hikaru as he goes to junior high. We also see his sister Kanon graduate kindergarten and begin first grade, the Azumis deal with family health problems, and Sachiko's relationship with her mother-in-law evolve as she begins to learn more about Hikaru's needs. The volume does end somewhat abruptly on an alarming note!
July 10, 2021
It was nice seeing more of the lives of the others around Hikaru! It does make you realize how different Hikaru is, which I assume was the mangaka’s intention.
I’ve learned so much about people with disabilities reading this series!
I’ve learned so much about people with disabilities reading this series!
February 5, 2014
http://nwhyte.livejournal.com/2242270.html[return][return]Hikaru has started to hit puberty, and has to be dissuaded from touching himself or pretty women inappropriately; family and school dynamics continue to be a strain; and we get sidetracked for a couple of diversions, when his father attracts too devoted an admirer at work and a couple of his classmates come to terms with their own fannish obsessions. But the core narrative remains sound, of Hikaru and his mother Sachiko dealing with a world which has not been designed for his needs, and doing the best they can. I have the next volume ready to read.
August 1, 2016
Another great volume in this series. This edition shares stories about the struggles of unsupportive family members, sibling relationships and tween friendships. It also touched on teaching appropriate social behaviors and beginning to navigate puberty.
Many helpful insights and suggestions - as always. I didn't find the storyline action very compelling in this volume, but the series continues to deliver real life examples of what it is like to raise a child with autism.
Many helpful insights and suggestions - as always. I didn't find the storyline action very compelling in this volume, but the series continues to deliver real life examples of what it is like to raise a child with autism.
September 10, 2016
I like how positive this manga series is and how much you can learn by reading this, even though you wouldn't know anyone who is autistic.
Displaying 1 - 11 of 11 reviews