Massive, massive, MASSIVE disappointment.
Obvious spoilers ahead.
The premise for this book is amazing; a boy named Bartholomew loses his sight at the age of three, when surgeons remove his eyes to save him from fast spreading cancer, and then, though eyeless, regains it at the age of thirteen.
Thinking that it could be a fun, fast paced daredevil-like story, with quantum theory involved, I was setting my hopes high. Boy, was I let down.
When a reader opens the book he reads how Barty loses his sight at the age of three...and then regains it at the age of thirteen. The fact has absolutely nothing to do with the factual story. If you though the novel would revolve around the boy regaining his sight, you're dead wrong.
The book begins with the details of the boy growing up (before he loses his sight). There's an evil killer who murders his own wife and then is stalked in a hospital by a mysterious detective, who is mysterious because he can do coin tricks. The killer learns that he muttered the name "Bartholomew" in his sleep and of course decides that Bartholomew is his worst enemy, and that he must kill him.
He decides to kill the detective (who wouldn't). He assaults him with a candlestick, puts him in a car and then drowns the car in a pond. However, the skull bashed, unconscious detective doesn't care about the killer's plans and just...swims up from the drowning car. Hooray for logic ! Viva la plausibility !
Meanwhile, on the other side of the galaxy, Bartholomew discovers that he has some superpowers dealing with alternate worlds (the quantum theory bit), that he can walk in the rain without getting wet, and loses his sight. And, of course, he's a child prodigy. He calculates the distance and curves in his calculator head, so blindness aint' a problem because he can add 2 + 2 and calculate his way through the world.
The killer learns that a girl he once raped gave birth to a baby, and decides that the baby must be Bartholomew, so he goes on in a search to find the boy and kill him. The child turns out to be a girl, and she and her mother flee the evil killer only to end up being taken care by...AGNES, THE MOM OF BARTHOLOMEW. So when the killer finds them, he finds the girl (who is a brave prodigy too, though she has eyes) and the boy enters the scene.
BIG CLIMAX: The killer is ready to kill the boy, but...the girl pushes him into an alternate reality because, it turns out, she has superpowers too. All in about three sentences. He's gone forever.
BOOL ! THE END.
The remaining twenty or so pages serve to wrap up loose ends, and on the last page the boy regains his sight. Yes, the fact had NOTHING to do with the actual plot.
Koontz's characters have gone from naively charming (in a way) to simply naive. The melodrama is on the TV soap opera level. He spends paragraph after paragraph describing how brave and good Agnes is, how she delivers pies around the town to people who need pies and help. When her boy is born, he doesn't cry, doesn't take a poo, he isn't a kid; he's a robot.
Some might say that Koontz doesn't want to show the reader "unnecessary" information about growing-up of children, but if he constantly abuses the "show, don't tell" writing method and devotes page after page to stuff like this:
"Week by week, the slender sapling of frustration had grown into a tree and then into a forest, until Tom began every morning by looking out through the tightly woven branches of impatience" - what stops him ?
One might guess that he's just lazy and decides to take the easy way out and create perfect, ideal children for one simple reason - they're easier to write, they never cry, never argue, and according to him are the dream of every parent.
WRONG. Who wants to have a damn machine ?
Koontz makes a point by clearly showing which characters are good or bad. Here he gives his heroes the biblical names of the saints (Bartholomew, Grace, Celestina, Seraphim, Thomas and even Paul Damascus, hell, one girl is named...ANGEL). The sole bad guy here is named Enoch Cain. Get it ? Enoch Cain. Talk about metaphors and implied meaning.
The good guys are so saintly that the reader can't connect with them - it's quite hard to connect with a deity that drives around in a van and gives away pies. So the reader ends up rooting for the bad guy - who of course is present as stupid, bad, vile and disgusting person.
All of the characters are of course so well stocked on cash that they don't have anything better to do but just go and have adventures.
Koontz can't write kids; he just can't get them right. He deprived kids from all things that make them kids: emotions. His kids are too perfect, too smart, to ideal. He made both kids in the novel child prodigies, excelling at basically everything and pooping pure gold. Here's an excerpt.
"Each life,” Barty Lampion said, “is like our oak tree in the backyard but lots bigger. One trunk to start with, and then all the branches, millions of branches, and every branch is the same life going in a new direction."
If you can imagine a three year old, who still uses potty, saying this in a pre-pubescent, pre-breaking, lisping chipmunk voice, without sheding tears of laughter I salute you.
It's even funnier when he reagins his sight. The boy realized at the age of three that he can walk in the idea of rain, so he won't get wet. At the age of thirteen, he realized that he can use the idea of sight to see again. He spent TEN LONG YEARS without realizing that simple fact.
Guess the prodigy turned out to be a fool after all.
However, he has to do something to see and that would be to hard for him, right ? So he gets married with the little girl from before, and they have a daughter...who has superpowers too, and gives her dad his sight back, permanently. And to top the cake, they have a...golden retriever. I actually laughed at that, because of the sheer fact that when the book has over 800 pages there just has to be a dog in it, since it's a Koontz book, and boom ! t h e r e i t i s !
I could go on and on but honestly, if a man writes eight hundred pages about a killer hunting down the good guys and then eliminates him in 15 words, he doesn't know how to quit.
I do.
Stay away from this book.