Tout Sweet: Hanging Up my High Heels for a New Life in France

Karen Wheeler memoir #1

by Karen Wheeler

In her mid-thirties Karen has it all: a career as a fashion editor, a handsome boyfriend, a fab flat in west London and an array of gorgeous shoes. But when her 'plus one' leaves, she wonders if there is more to life than high fashion. So, she hangs up her Manolos and waves goodbye to her city lifestyle, deciding to go it alone in a run-down house in rural Poitou-Charentes, western France. Once there, she encounters a host of new friends and unsuitable suitors, soon learning that true happiness can be found in the simplest of things - a bike ride through the countryside on a summer evening, or six glasses of Pinot in a neighbour's garden. If you've ever dreamed of chucking away your BlackBerry and downshifting, "Tout Sweet" is perfect summer reading.

Genres: France, Travel, Nonfiction, Memoir, Chick Lit, Romance, Biography

320 pages, Paperback

First published July 1, 2009

Reviews

[Ashley · Rating 2 out of 5]

Ugh what a dud to start the new year off with. I thought I'd settle in with a charming little book about moving to France & all that jazz, a bit like Under the Tuscan Sun, a book that I absolutely love, but this was just missing something for me. I couldn't really invest in the author's life choices, the friendships she made seemed VERY overblown to make the book a little more sensational, and I kept finding myself yelling at this 30-something woman to stop imagining a proposal from every man she would strike up a conversation with. It all seemed very juvenile. Apparently this is the first in a series of books? Eh, I'll pass. 2 stars.

[Mom · Rating 1 out of 5]

I was very disappointed in this book. It was another story about a woman who gets jilted and moves to France to find herself and get away from the past. I would probably have enjoyed it more if this wasn't so overdone (in fiction as well as non-fiction). A pet-peeve of mine when reading these "come to France" stories is the insertion of French words without context. I know a little French, but the common phrases used in everyday communication in France are the ones beginners aren't taught. It would be nice to know what they mean. Yes, I could look them up, but it is annoying when you are trying to read. If you like this kind of story, you might enjoy it, but be forewarned that she jumps around a lot and she tries to create suspense by not telling you all the details until the end of the book. I didn't think this was necessary since it is a memoir.

[Becky R. · Rating 3 out of 5]

After my trip to France this past summer, there isn't much about this book and cover that doesn't appeal to me. There is that certain passion for life in all of its facets that one can readily recognize in the French, and something that is very romantic--on the surface. Don't get me wrong, it is very romantic, but Karen Wheeler's memoir reminds us that there are drafty, run-down homes to be fixed, bug bites to cure (with nary a 24-hour drugstore in sight), and a lack of eligible bachelors to be found. Nonetheless, grabbing at life when she could is an appealing ideal for many readers, including this reader.

One of the things I loved about this memoir was the full disclosure of both Karen's self-possession and Karen's self-doubt. It was an interesting inside view of the person who took the journey. Maybe it was because of this unique inside look into her life that then had me fully vested in finding her true happiness, in whatever way possible. I loved watching her transform her rundown home into something all her own. From stripping floors to sealing and painting walls, it was so engaging to actually follow her process of remaking her little French home into one she could reside in.

One thing that had me on edge for her were the discussions of her romantic relationships. We start the memoir with a gripping heartache that propels her to France, that I think we all hope will be resolved with great friendships--which I'm not sure the assortment of people she meets fit--or with a love interest--which is hard when they have other motivations. Throughout the book she discusses looking for "suitors" in anyone from her neighbor to the baker in town. There does seem to be this build up to a relationship or sorts, only to have it dropped in the course of about three sentences--literally. For me, the build up of friendships and suitors to a startling resolution left me a bit out of sorts. If we were to spend 200+ pages dropping mention of the importance of relationships, I would hope that we would have a balanced explanation of their place in her life by the end.

Karen Wheeler is a marvelous writer, with an ability to recall her own life story in a novel-like fashion. I was so easily sucked in that my care and concern for her could match any fictional character I've been introduced to. Having said that, the philosophical end to the book felt very unsatisfying and left me sad for Karen, and not upbeat about the entire "finding of oneself" and slowing down that I think I was supposed to take away. On the whole, I have been recommending this memoir right and left, in the hopes that I can come to grips with my own reaction to its ending. It's not possible for me to spell out all the details, but I will say that the reality of it cuts through all that feels escapist or romantic. In short, I loved it and I hated it, both at the same time. I can't say that I've responded so strongly to a book in a very long time, and I'm still left trying to grasp how I felt. Honestly, you really have to read it to find out how Karen wrapped up her memoir. For this reader, I'll admit to wishing that maybe (like in my own life) there was just a bit more fiction to finish it off.

[Jacqueline · Rating 5 out of 5]

Having lived the dream in France for over eight years you may think reading about other peoples lives in France wouldn't interest me anymore - wrong, I love it. Before we moved I couldn't get enough of these sorts of books and although I will admit to loosing interest in them for a few years after we moved, which is probably why I missed Tout Sweet when it first came out, I am happy to play catch up now.

Tout Sweet is a very readable book; from the moment you take in the illustrations on the front cover you can't help stepping into Karen's life and devouring chapter after chapter. She is one brave lady, moving over here in her thirties (like we did) is not as common as retiring over here, and to do it alone is pretty unique. I got some strange looks when people realised I would be here alone for a lot of the time when Ade was away working, so I can imagine the reactions she received. It is therefore not surprising that one of the French villagers assumed she was married to one of the other expats, oops!

Karen also lives in the Poitou-Charentes, so we are almost neighbours, and it was nice to be familiar with some of the places she wrote about, especially as our UK lives were so different. Karen was a fashion editor, based in London with a glitzy social life, champagne receptions, designer clothes and handbags, the names of which when she mentioned them often meant nothing to me - oh yes, I really am that backward when it comes to fashion. Adapting to life in a village where the entertainment was expat scrabble evenings and a cup of tea, plus renovating and decorating her house (undertaken in designer dresses, no less), can't have been easy, but she coped and writes an entertaining account for her readers with some heartfelt personal bits too. Living in France does change you, and I was glad to see that she also does more in the kitchen now she is living in France, just like me. She makes her little house sound so inviting I wanted to join her for an apero in her flowery courtyard, despite having my own flowery outside terrace where I'm often to be found supping rosé and avoiding expat social events!

[미셸 (Undeniably Book Nerdy) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Tout Sweet: Hanging Up My High Heels for a New Life in France is a memoir written in an entertaining chick-lit style that I really like. Who doesn't wish they could just quit their nine-to-five job and live the simple life in an idyllic, peaceful European countryside. I certainly have and it was fun living vicariously through Karen Wheeler.

Though I enjoyed her recounting all her misadventures in renovating her house Maison Coquelicot ("house of the wild poppy")--which made me think that if a Manolo-wearing girl like Karen can do all that DIY she did I can too--it was her neighbors that were the most fun to get to know. There were a lot of crazy characters like Miranda who drank like a fish and Victor the estate agent who had a crush on Karen, among others. There were a lot of drama going on and there's even a surprising twist (or more like a big reveal) in the end. I equally appreciated her descriptions of the French countryside, the little village of Villiers and the house, Maison Coquelicot, itself.

Having said that, it did start slow and I wasn't able to get into the story until about two-thirds of the book when Karen finally moves to France and I meet more of her neighbors. This memoir has the similar feel of Eat, Pray, Love but I found Tout Sweet to be a lot more fun to read because it's wonderfully written in that Karen tells her experiences and story in a way in which the reader is like her best girlfriend. It's funny and charming and I recommend it if you're looking for some light summer reading.

**Reviewed by Michelle for Michelle & Leslie's Book Picks book blog.**

[Wendy Hines · Rating 3 out of 5]

Karen is thirty-five and suddenly alone. She's tired of the rat race - she's a fashion editor - and her boyfriend of several years, Eric, has left her. She realizes that she can't keep up with the women these days, with their glowing skin and tiny tummies. She decides to chuck it all and move to France.

She gives up a kitchen floor (lol), internet, hot water and a bathroom. The tiny house she has rented in Poitou-Charentes, central western France, is very run-down, but it will keep her busy fixing it up.

The journey there is hilarious. Once there, though, she make new friends, neighbors and learns how to live a simple life. Sometimes when we put away the hurry and technology, we find the simple things that give us so much joy in our lives and others.

Karen Wheeler writes a lively and clever memoir of moving from the big city to the small countryside. The characters are distinctive and engaging, and the attention to detail captivating and entertaining. A cross between a memoir and chick-lit, fans will devour this one!

[Mimi Brooks · Rating 2 out of 5]

what i thought was going to be an informational and inspiring story turned into a whine-fest by the author about the lack of a boyfriend. in this modern age, i would have found it more refreshing if the focus was on what you can do on your own, rather than be depressed because you can't find a boyfriend and/or keep one. hardly any descriptions about how to mingle in with the french but plenty of descriptions about every "possible" hookup. sorry, ms. wheeler. you obviously had tons of money to buy and fix up a perfect home in france, so stop complaining that a guy doesn't call you back after you sleep with him on the first date. (that can happen anywhere in the world.) no thank you.

[Jeannine · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was fantastic! Karen Wheeler is a very talented writer, and I really enjoyed being caught up in her world. She made the setting and the characters come to life, and I limited myself to one to two chapters each night (no easy feat!) so it would last longer.

[Kristin · Rating 4 out of 5]

I enjoyed this story about a woman building a new life in a country French village. Admittedly, it’s a light read.m, with a lot of focus on quirky people and relationship issues. But I’ve always been interested in all things French, so I loved reading about the language, the people, the customs and the mundane things about homeownership there. I recommend if you also would enjoy reading about these things!

[Tara Carpenter · Rating 2 out of 5]

I love the idea of this book - a single women selling up and moving to rural France. (Sound familiar? I think Frances Mayes inspired a lot of people.) This book is a memoir of the author's real experiences. I was interested in the journey - renovating the home, making friends, learning a new culture, and looking for love, but thought it read totally like a journal. The writing isn't literary worthy and pretty much everything focused on her love life; will-she/won't-she meet someone. It was pretty slow and boring to me and a third of it was gossip about other people but I might love Karen in real life. I'm impressed with the fortitude and gumption she had to make major changes in her life. But how did she find such weird and crazy men & friends? Was it all real?

[Paige Redwine · Rating 2 out of 5]

I characterize the writing as descriptive and transporting to the setting of rural France. The author is even humorous. The story as a whole, however, was slow and dull. I also don’t share the lifestyles of the characters in the story. Consuming lots of wine and holding morals loosely isn’t admirable to me. I didn’t feel a connection to the people.

[Antof9 · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is basically "Under the Tuscan Sun" written as chick lit (which by the way, would have made UtTS much better). It's light, but not fluffy, the author is definitely getting to know herself, and it's an interesting story to read (unlike UtTS, which had potential to be interesting to read, but instead was basically a boring documentary - a chronicle, if you will, with no story. While I'm on this tangent, and for anyone actually reading this who likes that type of story, read Extra Virgin instead. It's far superior, and takes place in the olive groves of Liguria, Italy).

The regular hassles of renovating a house are doubly and triply difficult in a different country, and not just for the language. The author chronicles them in an interesting and entertaining fashion.

And she throws in things like that make everyone nod in agreement: "... Desmond is retired but he used to be a bank manager - I think. They're both strict lacto-vegetarians and very into healthy living, but don't worry, they're good fun." "Right," I say, thinking that I have yet to meet a strict lacto-vegetarian who was really good fun.

Anyway, this book was interesting, and charming, and believable, and makes me want to go visit this little town with it's surprisingly un-French (read: good) food and friendly but nosy neighbors.

It was nice and light, too -- a good book to read before something as heavy as Columbine.

[Emma Kaufmann · Rating 3 out of 5]

Karen Wheeler decided to chuck in the superficial world of fashion journalism to move to rural France and indeed the beginning of the book is pretty good. Like most people I have wondered if life in rural France would be enjoyable. Wheeler tells it warts and all and it does seem to have some high points mainly the chocolate croissants and hunky local baker.

The problem is Wheeler still works as a fashion journalism when she lives in France so it seems like she cannot cut the umbilical cord to her past life. She is to some degree depressed and pining over her ex -a frenchman called Eric and can't for the life of her understand why most of the people she attracts as friends and lovers in France are emotional basketcases. It is because when you are depressed you tend to attract people having nervous breakdowns. All of which leads to some amusing scenarios of drunken people screaming abusive stuff to eachother but you do end up shuddering a bit and thinking, 'whew, thank God those aren't my friends.'

In the end Wheeler does not seem to have learnt much about herself but maybe this is as it should be. Not every book has to end in one of those American voiceovers about 'Karen learnt that by painting her own rustic walls and dealing with her own rustic bed bugs she could heal her broken heart and learn to love again.'

[drey · Rating 3 out of 5]

drey’s thoughts:
Tout Sweet appealed to me because Karen did something I’ve always dreamed about–picking up and moving to France. Or Italy–I’d move to Italy, too. I can’t imagine buying a house on a whim, or having no kitchen floor, but love the idea of everything within walking distance, friends across the way, and learning French. Of course, it’s a bit more complicated than that in real life! *grin*

The people Karen meets are a hoot to read about, but I don’t know that I’d have had the patience for the drama. What I liked most about Tout Sweet was the day-to-day stuff–chatting with the neighbors, having everybody wonder who the guy she’s having dinner with is, taking a walk…

Tout Sweet is c’est si bon! Add it to your summer reading if you like memoirs with a touch of foreign soil and a dash of self-discovery.

drey’s rating: Pick it up!

[Betty C. · Rating 4 out of 5]

As an expat in France, I am often either irritated or only vaguely interested in stories of others' adventures and misadventures. At best, I feel they are just quick, fun reads.

Tout Sweet was more of the latter category, but not "just" a quick, fun read. Wheeler depicts her characters quite well, has a great sense of humor and irony, and spins an engrossing story out of the usual expat material: food, drink, love and an old house to renovate. She gives a balanced vision of her experience, not hesitating to criticize France, often hilariously, when it's called for, but also touchingly identifying what she loves about it.

After finishing this, I immediately bought the second in the series -- and was glad there was one!

[Janie O · Rating 2 out of 5]

Karen Wheeler is a good writer - descriptive, funny, moves a book along at a very readable rate that you don't lose interest. However, I could not relate to her personal life choices. I kept waiting for her to wisen up to situations that she continued to get into. So, a good writer - yes! But I just did not like this particular book content...

[Wendy Williams · Rating 4 out of 5]

Career girl throws in the towel to move to Europe. We've read it all before. The difference with Tout Sweet is that not only is Karen Wheeler an excellent writer, she did it all alone. Her desperate and embarrassing need for a man aside, I enjoyed reading about her renovations and relationships as she settles into her new life in rural France. Most enjoyable.

[Stacey · Rating 3 out of 5]

Who hasn't at some time dreamed of packing up all of their belongings and moving to France. Karen Wheeler does this, and writes so descriptively I could almost smell the baguettes baking:)

[Min · Rating 2 out of 5]

Reading the adventures of those that have become ex-pats is new to me. I hoped this would be glimpse of another country- a peek into the aspects that only those living there would know- but found a book that was more the whinging of a 30-something with more money than sense who decided to leave her job after a particularly bad assignment, then, later, buys a house in dire need of every repair on a whim after being in the town less than a day. Others, no doubt, dream of having the funds to leave all of one's worries, and stresses behind to live in a place of deep rustic charm.
I found this book could easily be read as fiction- and with more of a sense of reality- but the consistent references to failed romances, and terrible interpersonal conflicts made France, and the region an 'any place' setting. The subtitle should be, "I bought a house, but what I really want is a boyfriend...and how I searched for one, in all of the wrong places".

All that said, she is a good writer. The chapters move smoothly into each other, setting up the next series of events. I read it through the mid-point with ease. I cannot find a connection to care about her poor choices, and self-inflicted consequences of rash whims. True to her fashion roots, she often describes the clothing of her friends and acquaintances as an opening to the type of person they are.

[Judy · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a story where the author makes you feel as if you're in the room, in the situation, in on her moods. It is and it isn't the typical "girl gets dumped by her boyfriend so she goes off on a wild tangent and buys a house in France" type of story. Our girl, Karen, goes through men and circumstances the way most people go through breakfast cereal. And the situations that she finds herself in....one guy is so standoffish that she thinks he hates her, even though he doesn't even know her, another one is only a friend until an unfortunate incident, a third is madly in love with her from the get go; unfortunately, he has a wife and 2 kids. There are others but her real story is buying a dilapidated old place in a tiny village in southwestern France and the encounters she has as she tries to bring it back to life. Along the way, she meets the most interesting people-Miranda, off the wall, loads of fun, eccentric, always up for a good time; Dave-the reason she finds herself in this tiny little village(just a friend), Victor-the real estate agent who wants to be something more, the wine merchant who is the person to go to for all the gossip, so many more. You would think in a small town, there wouldn't be this many interesting characters, but in a small town, that is ALL that you have; very few people are "normal". I hope you like this book as much as I did.

[Sandee · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved this memoir of giving up a lifestyle of glamour and city life, to move to France and buy a run-down house in a very rural area, alone and with not much knowledge about the country life and people she meets. A funny, inspirational, and honest read.

From Amazon:
In her mid-thirties, fashion editor Karen has it all: a handsome boyfriend, a fab flat in west London, and an array of gorgeus shoes. But when her boyfriend, Eric, leaves she makes an unexpected decision: to hang up her Manolos and wave good-bye to her glamorous city lifestyle to go it alone in a run-down house in rural Poitou-Charentes, central western France.

Tout Sweet is the perfect read for anyone who dreams of chucking away their BlackBerry in favor of real blackberrying and downshifting to a romantic, alluring locale where new friendships–and new loves–are just some of the treasures to be found amongst life's simple pleasures.

[Amy · Rating 2 out of 5]

A light-hearted memoir about a single fashion editor's move to a tiny French village. I love books that immerse me in my favourite places, and this did that to an extent, with nice descriptive passages about the countryside, but the author's preoccupation with her ex-boyfriend and constant searching for a man to replace him got on my nerves a little. Overall though, I really felt for her, trying her very best to escape a vapid life in London and seeking a more meaningful existence in the countryside, which is something that many people talk about, but few have the guts to do. It was also refreshingly honest - not everything was sunflowers and champagne - she was very frank about some terrible meals, awkward encounters, and the fact that she was a city girl who previously knew nothing about country living, but tried her best to learn.

[Michele · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is somewhat a story of moving to rural France and renovating a house but it is much more a story of numerous dysfunctional people. How one woman (suffering herself by an inability to get over a failed relationship) could find so many unusual and even unstable people is unbelievable. It was all a bit tiresome. And, as is usual with these situations, people try to find an outlet through alcohol and sex. There was plenty of "let's have a drink" and even getting drunk in the book. Although there was nothing sexually explicit, there were plenty of sexual relationships outside of marriage. There were occasional words of profanity but that was pretty rare. It just was not that interesting of a book. I would have preferred more about the town, the house, the renovation, etc. and less about the dysfunctional people.

[Alya Luteyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is about a woman named Karen Wheeler who isn't happy with her lavish London life and impulsively decides to move to rural France and start over. She wanted to leave London in order to get over her ex-boyfriend. Whilst in a quaint village in central western France, Karen encounters outlandish friends and rather unsuitable suitors, and learns she can be happy with just the simple things in life. I rather enjoyed this book because it was interesting for me to see if Karen was able to adapt to the very different life in France as opposed to her glamorous city lifestyle. It was also really fun to see her learn new things on the way and sometimes realize there's no easy way out in certain situations.

[Teresa · Rating 2 out of 5]

I wanted this to be so much better than it was. There was plenty of tension - that wasn’t resolved. Lots of hints at intriguing developments - which were either just loose threads or revealed in a quick matter of fact way at the end with no fanfare. She clumsily repeats herself a lot (I really did NOT need repetitions three through six that her favourite hippie coat is trimmed in furry astrakhan - a term that despite her love of it, she did not define and I had to Google). For somebody who already made a career out of writing before publishing an extensive memoir series, I expected stronger writing. Instead you get a massive cast of annoying whiny characters who Karen nonetheless dubs her “chosen family”, though why I can’t fathom as everybody in it sounds insufferable.

[Calee Spinney · Rating 3 out of 5]

For the most part, this is exactly what you expect: a mindless but enjoyable jaunt through the eyes of a woman who moves to France and renovates a house. I liked the author but it was incredibly irritating to hardly be able to read a page without some comment about wanting a boyfriend, or how sad it was that this guy only wanted to be friends. Even in the end, when she was trying to show how much she had grown... it was still all about a guy. COME ON, you’ve accomplished so much!! You’re more than all that.

[Pippa · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was an easy read about a successful career woman tossing in her comfortable job in London and moving to France. I love these stories about sea changes and I enjoyed this. Yes, it was a bit "chick lit" in places and sometimes I did wonder why the author was so obsessed with getting hitched, but the stories of life in small town France made up for it. I laughed at her admission that she'd moved to the only place in France where the food was terrible. It makes a refreshing change from those novels where life in France revolves around the food and wine - Karen's revolved around her relationships. I admire anyone who sets out on adventures like this, good on Karen for taking a risk.

[Elizabeth Butcher · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 stars, adjusted my rating from 3 down to 2 after some thought. Any sympathy I had for the author diminished each time she complained about how terrible it was to suddenly be single at the age of 35. Best information that I took away from the book was that not all areas of France are blessed with availability of good food. I did enjoy learning of how she built a new circle of friends and her observations on daily French life.

[Ayesha Abdullahi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Got this book from a charity shop and could just tell by the cover that it was going to be a light hearted comforting read and it was. Again, reading it in France just added to the experience as it’s about a Brit who moves to France and renovates a home, which also appealed to my interior design dreams. Also, I think this book is kind of a memoir turned into fiction, which I find really interesting too and would lowkey love to do that myself one day.

[Melissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a charming read, and I enjoyed it enough that I will try the next book from her about living in rural France. I truly appreciated the passages on her updates to the house and all the renovations as well as the renovators! She has a gift for capturing characters and making them very much 3-D and relatable. It was a little tiring hearing about her desire for a boyfriend all of the time, but her amorous pursuits and pursuers were not half as interesting as those of her neighbors!!