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The Corpse Wore Pasties

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Usually, when you call a burlesque act a "show stopper," you don't mean it quite so literally. But this time, that's just what happened: The show stopped dead, and so did the girl. And as I looked at her nearly naked and completely lifeless body and the bottle of poison in her hand with my fingerprints all over it, I thought to myself: Porkpie, you're in for it this time…

223 pages, Paperback

First published December 1, 2009

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Jonny Porkpie

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5 stars
95 (23%)
4 stars
134 (33%)
3 stars
120 (29%)
2 stars
37 (9%)
1 star
17 (4%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 65 reviews
Profile Image for Dan.
3,204 reviews10.8k followers
October 20, 2011
When Victoria Vice, widely hated in the burlesque world for being a blatant plagiarist, winds up dead, none other than Jonny Porkpie ends up being blamed. After all, he's the one that the entire audience saw hand her the prop bottle containing real poison. In order to clear his name, Porkpie goes on a quest through the burlesque world to find out who framed him. Only, maybe things aren't exactly as they seem...

The Corse Wore Pasties, aside from having one of the better titles in the Hard Case Crime Series, is a pretty fun book. Lots of humor, mostly at the expense of poor Jonny Porkpie. There's a tiny bit of smut but its no where near as dirty as The Money Shot, for instance. The plot isn't bad either, although I guessed who the killer was about halfway through.

To sum up, The Corpse Wore Pasties isn't going to win any literary awards but it's a fun way to spend a few hours.
Profile Image for Kemper.
1,389 reviews7,628 followers
June 13, 2011
As soon as I saw this title, I knew I'd give the book at least 3 stars based on it alone. It's a bonus that it's actually a humorous and entertaining story.

Jonny Porkpie is the self proclaimed Burlesque Mayor of New York City. Not only did he write this, he's the main character. It reminded me of the Kinky Friedman mysteries, with an eccentric New Yorker making a funny fictional story out of his real life.

Porkpie is a producer and host for burlesque shows. While guest-hosting a show for a friend, Victoria Vice is murdered on stage. Since Victoria was a blatant plagarist of other performers' acts and ideas, everyone backstage wanted her dead, but it's Porkpie that the cops think did it. So Jonny decides to play detective to clear his name. Unfortunately, no one really takes him seriously and his attempts to question the other performers lead to more and more trouble.

Porkpie may be a crappy detective, but he's a funny narrator. The burlesque performers he deals with are a smart-mouthed handful, especially his own wife who relentlessly mocks him for most of the book. Lighthearted, with just enough wink-and-nudge sex jokes to add some naughty flavor without being too over the top, this was a fast read that was good for some offbeat laughs.
Profile Image for Oliver Clarke.
Author 99 books2,040 followers
May 28, 2024
The mystery isn’t up to much, but the humour and debauchery keep it entertaining
Profile Image for Robert.
Author 11 books436 followers
September 16, 2012
Unique voices. I love ’em. Give me a unique voice any day of the week, and twice on Thursdays, and I’ll follow it around like an oversexed twenty-one year old with a fistful of ones might follow a big-breasted blonde stripper named Trixie. And that’s what I love most about the hard-boiled mystery genre: we’re never short on unique voices. And if we are, we just conjure up a few fedoras from the past with our fistful of ones, and we’re bound to have ourselves a banging good time.

And then there’s the cover and title. Fantastic. If THE CORPSE WORE PASTIES could win some sort of award on cover and title alone, it’d have my vote. If it hadn’t already received four stars from me, I might have felt obligated to raise the novel another half star or so, simply for title alone. And I’m not even a big fan of titles. What I really like are unique titles. This title really has it all.

As for what’s inside the cover, Jonny Porkpie, both character and author, really nailed the hard-boiled voice, along with being a rather memorable character. He’s never without his porkpie hat, even when he’s fleeing a group of heavy metal thugs on the Brooklyn Bridge. While we see the world through Jonny’s eyes, he’s no slouch with the repartee, when it comes to first-hand reporting, or when he gives us more than a passing glimpse into the burlesque world. I had no idea burlesque dancing was such a cutthroat business.

The five femme fatales were an absolute riot, and I found myself chuckling along at this fast, light read. And I have to give a slight nod to Jonny Porkpie, the author. It’d have been very easy to go with the stereotype and give the burlesque dancers an airy quality. But he didn’t. He even has a Chinese philosophizing dancer named Brioche. Absolutely hilarious.

So if you’re looking for a peek behind the curtains into the burlesque world, and you’re looking for an amusing narrator as well as an amusing group of secondary characters, then you’d better pick up this novel, before the curtain closes and you’re left sitting in the front row in your trench coat.
Profile Image for Dave.
3,656 reviews450 followers
June 26, 2017
Once the title and the cover art capture your attention, you know that this is going to be a book you have to take a look at. The only possible hesitation has got to be the author's name. It sounds like a silly made- up name. That's probably because it is. Jonny Porkpie is the actual stage name of a performer and producer in New York's neo-burlesque scene. He is also a character that bills himself as the Burlesque Mayor of NYC and has actually run for NY mayor as recently as 2013. And, he can actually write a book that's lots of fun to read. The book is an easy read and is told in a fairly humorous narrative voice.

The Corpse Wore Pasties takes place on the stages and in the dressing rooms of New York's burlesque theaters. It is peopled with such characters as Cherries Jubilee, Victoria Vice, Jillian Knockers, Angelina Blood, and Eva Desire. All the performers hate Victoria passionately because she steals their acts. However, when she takes the stage and downs a prop bottle labelled poison and ends up writhing in convulsions on the floor, they all become suspects. And, the chief suspect is none other than Jonny Porkpie and his trademark hat. As an amateur, Porkpie sets out to solve the mystery and clear his name. Although this is not a traditional hardboiled crime novel, it is a fun romp through the burlesque stages of New York As well as across the Brooklyn Bridge.
Profile Image for Jim.
Author 7 books2,089 followers
December 28, 2015
A very fun murder mystery. I'd never heard of the author before, who is also the hero of this story. A humorous look at the raunchier side of NYC without a lot of violence or explicit sex - although lots of the latter are implied & of course someone did get killed. It was hard not to laugh out loud while reading many times.

http://www.jonnyporkpie.com/
Jonny Porkpie: The Burlesque Mayor of New York City, candidate for "actual" mayor of NYC, co-producer of Pinchbottom Burlesque the "Best Burlesque" in NY (New York Magazine, The Village Voice), author of The Corpse Wore Pasties, producer of "Jonny Porkpie's Bad Ideas", and all-around fool.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jonny_po...
for more. He's a hoot & the book was well worth reading.
Profile Image for Oli Turner.
523 reviews5 followers
Read
March 20, 2023
The sixty-second @hard_case_crime novel finished #thecorpseworepasties by #jonnyporkpie published in 2009 and it’s a fun fast paced frolic featuring frisky burlesque performers and an accused man playing amateur detective in order to prove his innocence. Plenty of witty wordplay and seductive characters. It knows what it is and does it very well. I had a good time with this one.
Profile Image for Viridian5.
944 reviews11 followers
February 11, 2020
More like 1.5 stars.

When the library displays The Corpse Wore Pasties by Jonny Porkpie, "burlesque mayor of New York City," with a (lurid) front cover tagline of "Sometimes there's no difference between the naked and the dead," in front of you, how could you resist? At least I couldn't. The top of the back cover summary is "Who bumped off the bump-and-grinder?"!

The burlesque stuff and humor are great. It's the investigation bits that bothered me. Book-version Jonny Porkpie is self-admittedly not a real detective, but it's still not great.
Profile Image for Josh.
1,732 reviews174 followers
February 2, 2011
Classic pulp in the Carter Brown tradition. The competitive world of burlesque is exposed as an unpopular performer is murdered on stage seemingly by her own prop with the self proclaimed Burlesque Mayor of New York City the prime suspect. Throughout the novel, Jonny Porkpie (author and protagonist) sets out to clear his name and find the true killer in typical who-done-it fashion. A very enjoyable, fast paced read. 5 stars.
Profile Image for Angus McKeogh.
1,376 reviews82 followers
August 12, 2015
This one was a surprise. Very entertaining. Funny. Written pretty well. Better than a lot of trash I've read recently. I'd definitely recommend it.
Profile Image for Jake.
2,053 reviews70 followers
September 19, 2021
This one’s Hard Case Crime book is one that I’ve been meaning to get to for some time. And while I didn’t think it was as good as other HCC tales, I wish the label would put stories out like these more often.

I’ve always been fascinated with the world of burlesque, even if I’ve never seen a show in person. I grew up in Baltimore, where Blaze Starr is still a legend as a former Block performer and then owner of the 2 O’Clock Club where she made her name. This book, written by a performer about performers, really tickled my fancy. It’s a fun concept.

And it’s decent execution (no pun intended). Johnny Porkpie will never be confused for Agatha Christie or Michael Connelly, the plot is predictable and almost too obvious. But it’s a fun mystery romp through the world of modern NYC burlesque, complete with the corniness and camp that make burlesque a specific kind of art, separate from stripping as Porkpie makes clear.

I understand why Hard Case Crime regurgitates books from the same writers these days. And I understand that the occasional Stephen King tale helps to keep the lights on. But I think it would be doing the label a good service if they took more chances on new or barely experienced authors with a great hook for a crime story.
Profile Image for James  Proctor.
164 reviews2 followers
December 3, 2020
Fun read, a breezy break from the trials and travails of a tormented world with this soft-boiled burlesque whodunit (Flesh Noir?), a whimsical tale doubtless hammered out over the weekend by a horny intern who loves and respects women and clearly enjoys playing up the stereotypes and cliches of the nocturnal world of strip clubs and boob bars.
Profile Image for Erika.
195 reviews1 follower
November 9, 2023
A fun little mystery involving the burlesque scene in New York. The author is not a writer and it shows, but it was still enjoyable (and short).
Profile Image for Sarospice.
1,210 reviews14 followers
April 20, 2017
A stripper dies in the first three pages... what's not to love? plenty of twists and turns even if the time period doesn't match the hard case crime feel..
Profile Image for Doug Beatty.
129 reviews46 followers
January 12, 2010
This was quite a lively romp! I had never read a hard case crime before, and this was a fun little treat. It seems the world of burlesque is dangerous, especially if you are Victoria Vice and notorious for stealing the acts from your fellow performers. It appears that Victoria steals one act too many, and manages to die onstage with various onlookers. It is up to the author, Jonny Porkpie, the mayor of burlesque, to take the case, because his fingerprints are all over the murder weapon. His girlfriend Nasty Canasta does not want him to get involved, because it could put him in the path of a killer, but Jonny soldiers on...

This one is quite humorous and an enjoyable and quick read. It does have elements of an old fashioned who-dunnit albeit set in a seedier locale. The writer had to have a great deal of fun writing this one and it makes for an exciting little romp. Try it out!
Profile Image for Adam Carter.
Author 244 books5 followers
January 3, 2015
Great title, great cover, and an odd little read. It's not unusual to find a book where the main character is actually the writer, and usually I loathe them. But there's something charming about this book, possibly because the writer does not make himself out to be something he isn't. Reluctant hero Jonny Porkpie sets off to solve a crime and along the way he stumbles more than he solves.

It's difficult to work out whether this is meant to be part satire of the genre, but whether intentional or otherwise it certainly works well.

This is a perfect example of Hard Case Crime giving its readers something entirely unexpected, and which otherwise I very much doubt I would have read.
Profile Image for Jure.
147 reviews11 followers
January 24, 2016
Agatha Christie kind of shitty set-up of some exotic environment where murder strikes unexpectedly and there’s closed circle of suspects, each of them of course having bulletproof alibi. I swear to god that in the middle of this crap I actually thought about “Murder on the Orient Express”. Because, you see, our victim wasn’t popular with any of the other protagonists because she stole their burlesque acts. Which is apparently such a big deal in the dirty, sinister and morally corrupted underworld of NYC burlesque that one can easily get killed for?

More here (review includes spoilers!):
http://a60books.blogspot.ie/2012/05/c...
Profile Image for David Baldwin.
8 reviews100 followers
Read
December 17, 2023
Very terrible. A garbage story, poorly structured and full of painful humor. Easily the worst "Hard Case Crime" I've read. Great title though.
Profile Image for Malcolm Robinson.
24 reviews
July 12, 2021
Not what I expected, in fact it was far better!
As a big fan of the Hard Case Crime line I was expecting a hard boiled gritty murder mystery, but what I got was a brilliant genre parody. I had never heard of the author Jonny Porkpie before buying this book, and this seems to be his only novel. He is a burlesque comedian, not an author, and it shows, because the actual mystery here isn't the best. I guess the killer only a few pages in, and I don't think it's because I was "too smart". However I could not put the book down because nearly every line to the story was hilarious! If you are a fan of pulpy detective novels, and have a sense of humor, you owe it to yourself to read this book. It's around 225 pages and I read it in a couple hours over a couple days. Never slows down in plot or laughs.
Profile Image for Max.
418 reviews11 followers
August 7, 2019
Who knew the world of burlesque was so cut-throat? Stuffed with as many half-assed double entendres as the shows, this book is an absolute hoot to read. Totally daft but laugh out loud funny throughout. As a detective novel it's not going to win any awards for twists or surprises, but it's the characters and the dialogue that made it for me - Porkpie steals the show but there's some close seconds, Filthy Lucre (!) amongst others:
"even though there was an angle for every curve in the dressing room that night, the cops didn't seem all that interested in pursuing them. (The angles that is. Not the curves.)". Brilliant!
Profile Image for ?0?0?0.
727 reviews38 followers
October 10, 2019
For the duration of the first thirty-or-so pages of, "The Corpse Wore Pasties", by Jonny Porkpie, I wasn't sure if this book would hold my attention, despite my interest in burlesque and crime fiction, due to the persistent winking at the reader by the author. However, that schtick lessened, and the characters blossomed, and the swing of the plot became humorous fun. It wasn't difficult to guess the identity of the murderer, but the restless piling on of events, the detailed and well-researched world the story unfolds in, and the likeable cast of offbeat side characters rendered such easy guessing, essentially, meaningless.
Profile Image for Josh Hitch.
1,273 reviews16 followers
May 7, 2020
This was a fun ride of a book, perfect dialog and tons of laugh out loud moments. But it does have a nice murder mystery element too. The pov of Johnny Porkpie as a murder suspect is perfection. Also it all involving Burlesque and it's performers is great setting.

Highly recommended just a fun read. I think most would have fun with it.
6 reviews
June 24, 2020
Really enjoyed this one, a fun little look at the burlesque scene in New York City. The actual mystery is fairly simple (there’s only ever about six suspects) but it’s a good ‘on the lam’ novel, and the writing style is full of life and personality.
Profile Image for annika.
563 reviews4 followers
June 18, 2025
this was such a fun time! i really enjoyed jonny as a narrator, his jokes were surprisingly fun and witty. probably most enjoyable if you read it in only one or two sittings (it’s not that long)
Profile Image for Avri.
161 reviews1 follower
April 4, 2024
This was a better read than I remembered it, funny with a solid mystery in a setting not a million miles from my 20s. I wonder if it was just a little too "out there" on first reading, back when HCC had a house style and this wasn't it. Glad my reread of the entire imprint brought me back to Jonny Porkpie.
Profile Image for Matt.
34 reviews3 followers
September 9, 2014
The 62nd entry in the Hard Case Crime Series, Jonny Porkpie's The Corpse Wore Pasties is an amusing distraction within a normally hard edged, hardboiled collection of novels.

From a crime story standpoint, this is only a two-star book (the actual murder, while graphic, isn't weighty with shock or dread or suspense, but rather described like performance art because it's mistaken for just that during a burlesque show). I gave it three stars, however, because of the entertainment value. Set in the world of burlesque shows and its performers, Johnny Porkpie (the self described “Burlesque Mayor of New York City) writes with a comedic style that snaps along and does produce a chuckle now and then, and the individual murder suspect characters (though caricatures would be a better description) are flamboyant and fun to watch and listen to as they dance around within the plot and spout one liners that are like sandwich boards for their respective personalities.

The plot is thin, convoluted and full of holes, and the identity of the murderer is telegraphed early on. However, when you view the story in the vein of a long running comedic anecdote the tale becomes much more palatable for its sheer novelty. Often, characters fail to act even with a semblance of normality (the main character’s wife, for instance, seems incredibly nonchalant that her husband is accused of murder) but all in all they are fun examples of the different types of people that make up the world of burlesque.

Read The Corpse Wore Pasties, or not. You’ll have fun if you do but, if not, it’s also not something you will ever kick yourself for missing out.
Profile Image for Neil McCrea.
Author 1 book43 followers
March 5, 2015
Kinda dumb, completely ridiculous, and remarkably entertaining

The experience of reading the Corpse Wore Pasties is not unlike watching an episode of a mid 80's detective show (Murder, She Wrote or Simon and Simon) with all of the most ribald and censor taunting humor of Three's Company added, except of course the novel is far more self aware than the television fare.

Hard Case has not only dedicated themselves to publishing hardboiled pulp tales both old and new, but they also make an effort to cover all of the related sub-genres. They've done police procedurals, Orrie Hit style erotic thrillers, international espionage, and with The Corpse Wore Pasties they've touched on the old celebrity pulps. At one time it was not uncommon for celebrities to license their names out to be used as the protagonist in various pulp fare. Harry Houdini was a licensed protagonist in one of H P Lovecraft's pulp horror tales, and more pertinent to Hard Case, Gypsy Rose Lee once had an entire line of pulp mysteries. I don't know how famous Jonny Porkpie is outside of a rather limited circle of burlesque enthusiasts, but unlike the celebrities of yore at least he's writing his own pulp adventures.

I don't know how many Burlesque crime novels I'd be willing to read, but the novelty of this one has certainly won me over. Now if only I could find a pulp horror novel featuring burlesque performer Tristan Risk . . .
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