Madoff's Other Secret: Love, Money, Bernie, and Me

by Sheryl Weinstein

Nobody knew Bernie like I did, and nobody knows about me… Sheryl Weinstein met Bernie Madoff when she was just shy of forty, and went on to have a twenty-year secret, intimate relationship with the man now known as an evil mastermind, a villain of the greatest proportions. It was 1988 and Sheryl was facing a huge dilemma. Bernie Madoff was paying her a great deal of attention. She was in the midst of a rocky marriage and feeling vulnerable, when the powerful Wall Street mogul began making overtures. As a successful CPA and head of a major charitable organization, she had a lot to lose. She directed him to take things slowly. Over the next five years, there were business meetings over lunch, followed by intimate dinners in hotel rooms and finally, private moments that for a time seemed intensely satisfying to them both. “I’m not to be trusted,” he once told her casually. She ignored it, having no idea how prophetic those words would be. After all, her relationship with Bernie was passionate and profound. She felt desirable. She was the one nobody knew about, with the window into the real man. So careful about investing her money, when the SEC cleared him in 1992 she decided to get in all the way--with her heart, her soul--and her financial future. Sheryl was in the wrong place at the wrong time. She couldn't possibly have imagined the devastation that would befall her. Learning the truth was shattering on so many levels. Many books are being written about the scale of Madoff's fraud, but until now, nothing has shown the man through private eyes. Sheryl Weinstein's riveting story reveals a Madoff who will shock and surprise you. From the boardroom to the bedroom, in each other, the two found something that had been lacking in their own lives. It's a story with tragic overtones--a drama that only now could find a devastating conclusion.

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction

224 pages, Hardcover

First published August 25, 2009

Reviews

[Jack Lehnen · Rating 2 out of 5]

If one has an abiding urge to know all about Sheryl Weinstein, Her husband Ronnie and Son, then this is the book for you . The reader gets first hand insight into her family, but, not a great deal about her relationship with " Uncle Bernie ". There are a few selatious tid bids with regard to her sexual relationship with him, but, for the most part we are left with the " I'am not, that kind of girl , normally, scenerio.
We find little personal material , other than Bernie does not get to use his " Special Purpose ", much at home and , he likes rough sex, and possibly likes to get his keester paddled occassionally. He likes a" Happy Ending " by hookers in hotel rooms . No doubt, he will be getting a few of those in prison .

One cannot feel a bit sad for Sheryl, as in her own words, she was literally " Screwed Twice ", by Bernie ..

Its a very quick read and thank god for that, I was excpecting something on the order of the John Edwards scenerio, but, was left with a life history of Sheryl and her family .

I think I have exhaused my interest in Bernie Madoff. He was most certainly One cold fish and probably one of the most greedy individuals put on earth in the last century

[Jane · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is the sort of book you read with fascination and disgust, a good bit of the disgust reserved for yourself for reading it. The author carried on a long term affair with Mr. Madoff. She reveals graphic details which are extreme and unnecessary. One is amazed that her husband and son approved of the book, which is likely due to the fact that they lost all their money with the infamous Madoff. Still, by writing such a lurid book, I'm afraid she lost a lot more than money.

[Lindsay Hale Parke · Rating 3 out of 5]

I found the author to be just as disgusting as Bernie Madoff. The two were made for each other. Her need to include details about the size of Bernie’s anatomy was off putting, vulgar and seemed motivated by revenge. It was unnecessary. I also didn’t care for her attempts to make excuses for her infidelity. Kettle meet pot.

[Lauraleigh · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is the best book I've read in a while because a) it has nothing to do with law school; and (b) it's trashy. I'm slightly obsessed with the Madoff case as it is, so this book only fed my obsession. A quick read for anyone who needs a mindless fix.

[Danm · Rating 3 out of 5]

I found this at Goodwill while treasure hunting for books. This is an easy and fast read, and it gives you great insight into Madoff as a person. On the other hand, while I appreciate Sheryl's honesty, she seems to lack any accountability whatsoever for her actions while stabbing both of her romantic interests in the back. She seems to take pride in the fact that she was loyal to her husband for decades and only cheated once during that time. She also writes as though she deserved the adventure. This was all while her husband was changing for the better (for her), and while he threw her a surprise b-day party and bought her the expensive watch she hinted about. Ugh! Perhaps I'm incorrect (I hope so), but Sheryl strikes me as an American princess type of woman. This is NOT an attractive or likeable trait. Not feeling as though I was on the same team as the "protagonist" made this a bit of a challenging read, yet not in the traditional sense since the story moved.

[Elizabeth · Rating 1 out of 5]

I think this is the worst book I ever read, but loved the trashy story.

[Lajet · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read it to learn more about the impact of such a theft on people's lives. I also read (sort of) The Bag Lady Papers for the same reason (I didn't finish The Bag Lady Papers). Both authors lost money after investing with Bernie Sanders. Neither of them revealed how much, although this author said it was "everything" and reason to believe "everything" was substantial. Not so clear in The Bag Lady Papers. I don't doubt that both of them were severely hurt by Madoff's Ponzi scheme.

They both seemed to be landing on their feet well enough and it isn't clear to me how, given how much it seems they lost.

What I did learn in this book that was interesting.
I've sometimes wondered how people pull off affairs. How does the first move get made? and second and third... I guess it's probably a lot like dating before being married, except for the BEING MARRIED and having to keep a secret part. Keeping secrets is not easy - and as best I understand, HAVING to keep a secret (of any kind) is often not good for the soul. Now that I know how, I'm not sure I'm glad. I'm not all that pleased with having read the details of how to have an affair. Not sure why. It just doesn't feel that uplifting to know, I guess.

She also provided a picture of an incredibly powerful and successful man who
1. was sort of afraid of his wife, to whom he was very loyal, too (well, wouldn't divorce). At the end of the book, it was unclear whether he was loyal to her because he believes in being loyal (as in "not leaving," not as in "no other sex" obviously) to his wife, or genuine affection, or because he couldn't afford to get a divorce that would require filing financial affidavits under Penality of Perjury (know as the 236b form in New York) regardless of whether both spouses agreed what to put on the form that was not accurate.

2. may have done what he did in part because of toxic messages about masculinity, particularly physical masculinity, that he absorbed but did not have the physical ability to meet. I don't know that that is part of why he did what he did, but I find it plausible that it at least contributed to it, and heartbreaking. How so many people may have suffered because he may have been compensating (at least partially; he had other toxic messages from his family also) for not being/having what he could never be/have.

3. at the end, it was unclear how much he cared about the author. Throughout most of the story he seemed to have genuine affection for her. and yet he took her money, and her mother's money, and her child's money. I suppose it would have been hard to explain why he didn't want her to invest with him.

4. I have a bit more visceral understanding of someone who could pull off the biggest Ponzi scheme, for years. It's still an enigma to me. From this and other books, it's almost like he didn't care if he got caught; he didn't even think about it much. He was doing what he needed to do today.

I also learned a few interesting tidbits.

a glimpse of the life of the ultra wealthy going to Europe for the week-end, and ......
Unlike Bag Lady Papers, I finished this book, and quickly.

[Sandy Ortega · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book is very thin. It’s not very long. I had to read this after I read Truth And Consequences Life Inside the Madoff Family and also The End Of Normal.

This book was not that great. I kind of heard it wasn’t but I had to buy it used and knew she wasn’t getting any of my money so that’s why I bought it. I think she thought she was all that. All throughout the book she talks about how she was pretty or how men looked at her. I don’t know but something about her personality didn’t sit well with me. I felt like everything she wrote, she wrote in hopes that Bernie’s wife was reading it.
Anyway, I would do just fine not reading her book. But curiosity got to me and I bought it used so I thought what the heck. She kind of repeated herself in the book and went on and on later after he was busted saying how he took so many people’s money including herself and people she knew. But she was just as shady having an affair with him when she knew he was married and she was married. She didn’t think he was so bad when she thought he was investing her money. So… I had no sympathy for her. But I do have sympathy for all the other people who lost their money: and I have sympathy for his family as well because he destroyed his own family.

[Diane J. Caldarulo · Rating 3 out of 5]

Depressingly over indulgent

this story could have been written in less pages. I was forced to put it down numerous times in shear boredom....but always finishing a book, nevertheless.
The author wrote about a time in her life, the only problem was she sometimes repeated feelings and or actions. I didn't need to know of the size of his penis and did not need that point to be repeated twice more. Disappointed in this version of events and profoundly saddened by the fact that I purposely searched this book out after reading stephanie and Mark's books.

[Maureen Mckenzie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I truly enjoyed. Quite upsetting knowing so many trusted and lost everything. Sheryl's impact statement was brilliant and brave. It's truly hard to believe he could use, abuse and steal from people he claimed to care about. The only place anyone's money is safe is with their own self. I hope his sentencing has at least allowed some healing to take place for some. Thank you for sharing your story.

[Mary Ann · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really liked this book. The woman who wrote this had an affair with Bernie for 20 years and talks about his weird secrets. She thinks he has OCD and other disorders. Very insightful.

[Reena · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is not a literary marvel but it does give some very interesting insights about Bernie Madoff, his life and family. It provides yet another slice of the pie in the Madoff story.

[Linda Simmons · Rating 2 out of 5]

Interesting enough. Kind of pathetic.

[Colette · Rating 3 out of 5]

Other than the fact that the writing could have been better and Ms. Weinstein was not at all likeable, this was an entertaining and enlightening read.

[Heather G · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is entertaining and provides a unique view of Madoff. (A very unique view, to say the least.) I wonder if he's read this? Qualifies as a bit trashy.

[Jill · Rating 4 out of 5]

I would rate it 3.75

[Kalli · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting to read other reviews. Clearly I enjoyed this book more than most; but most readers have never been in a relationship with a sociopath! That created a draw for me. She seemed to believe in Bernie's emotional life and statements as she wrote the book. A true sociopath has no real emotion. Therefore I think she exposed some belief that she and Bernie had something special...Google says otherwise (he had plenty of other relationships going on concurrently.) It is nevertheless astonishing to think about how he was capable of destroying the lives of lifelong friends and family members with such a capable and harmless and trustworthy front. This book is no classic; I agree that it was surely written partly in desperation to recoup financial loss; however, it was a quick, easy, and fascinating read.

[H. K.]

Well she told both side of the story. She also owned up to being part of the affair, which she didn't have to, knowing that she was going to be overly criticized for being with him.

We all have to remember that both of them were riding high.

I was very interested in how she handled her own family situation.

Another thing that I got out of reading her book is that I do not believe that Mr. Madoff let anyone else in on his actions. I strongly believe that his sons did not know of his poniz scheme. I believe if they had known they would have turned him in as soon as possible.

Enjoyed the book, and her matter of factly writing style.

[Reader · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed this book but there are a few things i disliked heavily. 1. i wish she included her own faults in her marriage instead of blaming her husband 2. i wanted to hear more about her life during the trial and how she was affected. However i don’t usually read autobiography’s but this one was interesting and it was fun to read from the perspective from a well off white woman living in new york.

[Janice · Rating 2 out of 5]

Reads like a cash grab. Bernie took her fortune and now she has to write a tell all book. At least Ms. Weinstein didn't spend much time bemoaning her misfortune. She is one of those women who is brilliant until the wrong man comes along and then turns into a complete fool.

[Victoria Lord · Rating 3 out of 5]

Entertaining. I have read way too many memoirs about Bernie Madoff and his squad. I need to take a closer look at myself and figure out what the draw is. What a piece of work. His wife cracks me up. I keep thinking of her being interviewed and saying, “what’s a ponzi scheme?” and then throw in this mistresses’s story and some popcorn and I’ve got myself a busy Friday night waiting to happen.

[Kim · Rating 2 out of 5]

Madoff's mistress comes clean in tell-all book.