Passport to Purity

by Dennis Rainey, Barbara Rainey, Mark Whitlock

A True Connection product. Box with four audiocassettes, 64-page student guide, 88-page parent manual, gold seals, and commemorative passport. Connect with your preteen or early teen on this once-in-a-lifetime getaway! Parents, how would you like a workable plan and effective tools to successfully prepare a preteen or early teen for the turbulent adolescent years? This guided weekend retreat for a father and son or a mother and daughter Provide everything needed for a once-in-a-lifetime getaway together. Help you confidently and effortlessly share the "birds 'n' bees" talk. Prepare your child to make wise, biblical choices about friendships, growing to sexual maturity, moral purity, and relationships with the opposite sex. Grab your child's attention with drama, sound effects, upbeat music, and creative object lessons. Use Passport to Purity to open the door to adulthood. Establish a foundation of openness and trust which will last a lifetime!

Genres: Parenting, Nonfiction

152 pages, Paperback

First published July 13, 1999

About the author

Dennis Rainey is president and CEO of FamilyLife, a division of Cru. Dennis and his wife, Barbara, have spoken at Weekend to Remember conferences around the world. Dennis serves as the daily host of the radio program "FamilyLife Today". He and Barbara have authored more than two dozen books, including the bestselling "Moments Together for Intimacy" and" Moments Together for Couples". The Raineys have six children and nineteen grandchildren.

Reviews

[Petra X · Rating 1 out of 5]

I was looking at the reviews on Amazon of Interviewing Your Daughter's Date and being absolutely horrified at the idea of it and then I saw this book and thought well, Daddy could save all the expense of this book, cd and weekend away by just frightening off the boys.

But it turns out that the Raineys are quite even-handed. Not only are girls expected to be Untouched Virgins, but boys are not supposed to even kiss their girlfriends or fiancees until after the marriage ceremony. Why are some people so frightened of sex? Is it because it is animalistic and enjoyable on a completely different level than the achieving and cerebral ways that make up most of our daily levels? Is the sweaty, slippery grunting, fleshy bucking and drawn-out cries in the night if it's done well just so distressing to some parents that instead of being pragmatic and trying to ensure their offspring don't get HIV or make an unwanted baby they try to pretend to themselves that a talk will mean they don't have to deal with the realities of 21st century life and their kids will remain virgins until marriage? It's just so unlikely to happen these days.

And with this attitude of Virginity is purity and the loss of it means a used, soiled creature who will feel they have let their family and future husband down. It is just building up guilt, sadness, disappointment and perhaps even feeling that their family and perhaps their congregation now regards them as a slut who should never marry in white! Is this what these people want their daughters to feel (I don't think men are going to take it quite so hard, but what do I know?)? In this day and age most girls will have sex, will 'fall' and all the guilt in the world that Daddy and Mummy have laid on them isn't going to stop them.

A good friend of mine is a devout Church-going, choir-singing Christian. Her daughter, the same age as my son, went to a girls' boarding school in the UK. Despite the lack of potential love objects, at 14 she found one and phoned her mother about her crush. Her mother arranged a visit with an aunty to a family planning clinic where the ins and outs of getting the pill and condoms by herself when she was ready were explained. Innocence is not as good as protection and 'just say no' has never been a successful strategy for anything where young people have to deny themselves.

This isn't a review of the book, I was just horrified by the Amazon reviews, so it's a rant. What's new?

[Paige · Rating 1 out of 5]

Absolutely disgusting. I had a “vacation” with my mom to do this curriculum and it caused so much humiliation, self-hate, frustration, and confusion, that I am still dealing with the aftermath over a decade later and have had to talk through it with my therapist. Shame on anyone who puts their child through this. Instead of harmfully repressing sexuality, learn how to talk about it in a healthy way that doesn’t make your child feel like a piece of trash.

[Bekah Noble · Rating 1 out of 5]

This book promotes super shameful and damaging messages about sex and sexuality. My youth group did this curriculum back in 2004, and now as a married adult, it still haunts me! Do your children a favor- don't get caught in the purity binary- God made them and they are made in God's image. We don't have to define purity only by absence of sexual activity.

[C · Rating 3 out of 5]

It's convenient, but I think you may want to get your own material and personalize it, especially for your daughter. She might like certain types of puzzles or a feminine touch to the project materials. However, if you choose to buy this, you may want to replace the 3 small yellow, blue and red Playdoh with a fresher set that doesn’t crumble. Moreover, the enclosed balloons are not durable. Get the helium-grade latex balloons and test it out ahead of time to make sure they don’t burst when you pierce it with a needle. If so, try putting scotch tape on the filled balloon. If that works, you will have to bring tape along with you. Remember you need to do some glueing before the weekend and matches are not included.

[Neil R. Coulter · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've done P2P getaways (using Version 2) with all three of my sons, and they have been the best times of my life. I wish I'd had this kind of advice when I was starting the teenage years. I might have been spared some dumb choices and immaturity. The teaching on purity is biblically informed, reasonable, and grounded. It is not at all an extreme, legalistic mindset. I really appreciate the Raineys' wisdom in putting together these materials for parents and kids.

I highly recommend this to all parents wanting to encourage their kids in Christ-centered, mature, wise living. If you have any questions about what our experience has been with these materials, please feel free to send me a message here.

[C · Rating 5 out of 5]

I recommend ALL parents to do this one-on-one weekend getaway with their 11-12 year-olds, ideally, father with son and mother with daughter, around puberty. It’s the BEST and most comprehensive way to talk about sex with your pre-teen! Join the more than 150,000 parents and children who have done this over the past 17 years. The skits, stories, music, testimonies, workbook, projects, humor, and pauses for discussion keeps us engaged and focused through this life-changing weekend.

I am so grateful for our Pastor who gave me the P2P Getaway Kit to do with my son this year! Despite being a physician who educates pre-teens about their bodies during their yearly physical exams, I still have great anxiety broaching the subject when it comes to my own kids. I’ve been sharing bits and pieces about this topic as appropriate throughout the years, but 11-12 year old is the time to finally put it all together for your child during this special weekend. Thankfully, this third edition kit from FamilyLife makes it as easy as possible through several CDs featuring Dennis & Barbara Rainey.

It’s an enriching experience for all types of learners.
1. For the auditory learners, the journey begins with listening to the first session on CD in the car on the way to the getaway location.
2. For the musical learners, the music woven throughout the CDs is amazing and the Scripture songs highly reinforce the verses we discuss.
3. For the logical learner, the pre-teen’s hardback Travel Journal is a systematic and organized way to go through the material.
4. For the visual learner (don’t worry, there are no anatomy pics), the illustrations/pictures in the Journal were eye-catching and the written material was nicely done.
5. For the physical learner, the lessons are reinforced by filling in the blanks and writing his/her thoughts down in the pages with discussion questions.
6. Whether your child is a verbal learner, there is great value in the planned discussion times with you as a parent.
7. For the kinesthetic learner, the 5 projects that we do together are a lot of fun.
8. The social learner loves the fact that they get to spend precious time with their parent.
9. The reflective or solitary learner can refer to their Journal for many years to come.

“We should not be ashamed to discuss what God was not ashamed to create”. Yes, we talk about the mechanics of sex like erection, ejaculation, sperm, egg, semen, natural nocturnal emission, etc., but we also talked about the 4 reasons God designed sex.

In addition, we cover kissing, dating, the dangers of pornography, where boundaries should be, 5 areas/ways to stay pure (even for me as married person!), masturbation, sexual experimentation, and sexual identity.

Worth it, but there are tips to make this weekend go smoother:
1. Read through the tour guide at least 1 month before the planned weekend. Better yet, plan months in advance to prevent schedule conflicts, win an affordable Priceline bid for your hotel, get the necessary materials for the projects, schedule some fun activity that your preteen would enjoy (like a NBA or baseball game), get the special commemorative gift, handwrite a meaningful and personal note in your child’s Travel Journal BEFORE you begin the trip — there are just a lot of details that need to be ironed out before the trip.
2. Buy the P2P Project Kit. It should have all the project materials you need. However, you may want to replace the 3 small yellow, blue and red Playdoh with a fresher set that doesn’t crumble. Moreover, the enclosed balloons are not durable. Get the helium-grade latex balloons and test it out ahead of time to make sure they don’t burst when you pierce it with a needle. If so, try putting scotch tape on the filled balloon. If that works, you will have to bring tape along with you.
3. Do the optional session on CD 6 by 5pm on Saturday (if you start the weekend trip on Friday afternoon). That way, you can do the final 5th session by 6pm before your celebration dinner.
4. Find a destination within 2 hours drive from home. That way, you can have a more relaxing drive with your pre-teen in the front seat in case he/she wants to pause the CD at any time. If you are driving a long way or flying, the exhaustion or complexity of the logistics may distract from the purpose of the trip, unless you block more time together that weekend/week.
5. Another site with good tips for planning the weekend with your daughter can be found at https://daughters4god.wordpress.com/2...

I hope this helps!
Blessings to you and your children!!

[Cheryl · Rating 5 out of 5]

Okay- I really listened to this as part of their CD set (which is totally modern and up to date-not like the picture here). In reading/listening I was SO impressed with the advice and talks and encouragement in helping young adolescents in their journey through their teens trying to stay pure. I will definitely use it as a weekend away teaching tool w/my daughters and Travis is planning on it with the sons. It's a MUST I think in opening doors of conversation and making sure your child knows who they are and what God's plan for them and their marriage is. It's on Familylife.com for $24 with 5 CDs, workbooks, etc.

[Leslie · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have started this book in preparation for a weekend getaway with my daughter soon. I cannot wait!

I've now finished the book and audio CDs, this will be a wonderful experience to share with my child(ren). The right way to have THE TALK.

[Curt B · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was a very helpful book/cassette series to go through with my 13 tear old son. In fact, it was very timely as he is beginning to take an interest in a certain girl just as we were finishing up the material.

[Betty · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a good resource for connecting with your pre-adolescent kids. I used it for a weekend get-away with one of my daughters.

[Karla Osorno · Rating 4 out of 5]

Powerful to help continue conversation about faith, choices and grace. Grateful for this resource.