Finding Purpose Beyond Our Pain: Uncover the Hidden Potential in Life's Most Common Struggles

by Paul D. Meier, David Livingstone Henderson

A revolutionary approach to dealing with life's challenges that guides readers in how to face them and to recognize them as gifts from God. At one time or another everyone finds themselves questioning, "Does God still love me? Is there a purpose for all this pain?" Drs. Meier and Henderson teach readers how to face painful struggles head-on in a way that allows them to grow and mature emotionally and spiritually. In this timely book they explore the seven most common life In addition they offer the three reasons we often miss the gifts these challenges can be. This unique approach to an age-old problem will encourage and challenge readers to grow through their struggles instead of wasting energy trying to avoid them altogether.

Genres: Christian, Self Help, Nonfiction

281 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2009

About the author

Extract of DR. Paul Meier's biography on the website of the Meier Clinics:

Paul Meier is an MD/Psychiatrist/Ordained Minister who is the founder of the national chain of non-profit Christian psychiatry clinics, the Meier Clinics. He has authored or co-authored over 80 books, mostly Christian self-help books like Love is a Choice and Happiness is a Choice, and also a series of Bible Prophecy novels, including The Third Millennium.

Reviews

[Lenore Webb · Rating 3 out of 5]

I hate suffering from depression. It tangles me up in knots and causes great anguish in my life. And when I spend as much time alone as so often happens then I can fall into depression very quick. Then I question why this is happening to me.

I am sure you have been there before. Wondering if your loved or cared for? Why do the things happen that we can not control? Just what is the path to win on the stuggle we have?

Finding Purpose Beyond Our Pain, Uncover the Hidden Potential in Life's Most Common StrugglesBy Paul Meier M.D. and David Livingstone Henderson M.D.

At one time or another everyone finds themselves questioning, "Does God still love me? Is there a purpose for all this pain?" Drs. Meier and Henderson teach readers how to face painful struggles head-on in a way that allows them to grow and mature emotionally and spiritually. In this timely book they explore the seven most common life challenges:

* Injustice
* Rejection
* Loneliness
* Loss
* Discipline
* Failure
* Death


In addition they offer the three reasons we often miss the gifts these challenges can be. This unique approach to an age-old problem will encourage and challenge readers to grow through their struggles instead of wasting energy trying to avoid them altogether. I loved having this book to help me with my struggles. To know I am not alone. And to help remind me that there is a plan for all of us.

[Laurie Wheeler · Rating 5 out of 5]

Helpful book!

[Bryon · Rating 4 out of 5]

By Paul Meier, MD and David L. Henderson, MD
Nashville, 2009, Nashville
Number of pages: 278

This is one of those books that I read too late in life. I wish I read this book when I was, like, twelve. You read this book and feel like it contains the secrets to the Universe. Simple. Profound. And not nearly as cliché as the previous sentences I've written.
"What if, instead of chasing after a pain-free life, we realized that pain is not the enemy? In fact, pain can be our ally if we allow it to lead us away from danger and toward the healing power of Christ," write the authors. What a concept. We spend so much time chasing happiness and trying to avoid pain that it takes most of a lifetime to learn that pain is the first step to healing. In fact, healing can't happen without pain.
There are three reasons why we miss the lessons that come from pain:
we focus on our circumstances instead of God
we have more fear of pain than we have fear of God
we forget how faithful God has been in the past
"Comparing our circumstances to others' and calling it injustice will not bring relief from pain. It only makes it worse," the authors write. So true. This is the story of my life. I get so wrapped up in how the other guy is lucky or promoted or better looking or at the front of the lunch line that it weighs me down, causes exhausting mental gymnastics, and fills me with hate. It's like pain with compound interest. Quite a waste of time.
Not only is there purpose beyond our pain, but there is purpose beyond your injustices. The authors list five:
Remember your status.
Always give thanks.
What you see is not all you get.
Justice deferred is not justice denied.
Keep a record of rights.
These points sound biblical? They are. As you read them in the book, the authors develop these thoughts practically and reference them scripturally.
The book is organized into seven parts exploring these concepts:
Injustice
Rejection
Loneliness
Loss
Discipline
Failure
Death
The Meier and Henderson, as educated and experienced as they are compared to us commoners, write in a way that's accessible and completely understandable. You don't have to have a PhD to hang with these MDs. As I re-read areas of this book for this review, I became very aware of my desire to read the book again. I think it will serve as a great reference and I'll need to resist the temptation to loan it out knowing how helpful it will be.
So don't ask.

http://mondokblog.blogspot.com/2012/0...

[Kelly Hager · Rating 2 out of 5]

The thesis with this book is that hard times can either bring you closer to God or drive you farther from God. When bad things happen, it tends to be for one of two reasons:

1) God is using these incidents to improve you in some way. For instance, if you have a problem with patience, perhaps you will be put in situations where you have no choice but to develop that quality. :)

2) God didn't want this to happen, but will work within these circumstances so your life will continue to be what He wants. This is where free will comes in. He doesn't "let" you get mugged, but if you trust Him, He can take your fear away. (as an example.)

I don't think this would be a good book to read while you're going through difficult times (although maybe that's just me; hearing about how God works in mysterious ways after my dad died made me want to hit people in the face) but I think it'd be comforting to read after, once things are calming down a little.

I do have some issues with some of the things the authors said. First, as someone who's struggled with faith, I can tell you that atheists don't think that there's no point in being a good person in this life. You can be a moral or ethical person without believing in God. (And really, isn't there something to be said for doing the right thing because it's the right thing, not 'cause you think God will smite you?)

And second, they trotted out Carrie Prejean as an example of faith and not, say, prejudice. Yes, she has every right to believe whatever she wants. But let's not act like she isn't a bigot. If she had said that she didn't think black people/Hindu people/atheists/immigrants or any other group shouldn't be allowed to get married, we wouldn't even have to have discussions on whether or not she's prejudiced. And yes, it is the same thing. :)

[Marilyn Magallanes · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a great helping book on finding a purpose beyond our pain instead of living forever within it. I have written notes and posted colored tabs on its pages as well as used a highlighter within every chapter of this book. The authors begin with the topic of pain as it relates to injustice and how easy it is to compare our lives to others' and oft times wrongly perceive injustice. "Equal treatment does not automatically represent what is fair and just." They address the problem of how perception of injustice is so easily distorted by one's sense of entitlement. Can we handle truth and why blame God; rejection and acceptance; loneliness and knowing yourself, loss and gain, failure and true success, death and resurrection hope, and many more topics... Whatever you or your loved one might be dealing with these authors have addressed it as well as the steps to walk through it. They give "practical application points" at the end of each section for understanding how to follow through. This is a wonderful book; one that you could easily read time and again as needed.


Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze®.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255 : “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.”

[Mandy J. Hoffman · Rating 2 out of 5]

Finding purpose in the painful situations of life is something that more people need to be aware of and implement into their lives.

I know that Dr. Meier and Dr. Henderson are trying to encourage others to do this, and that their intentions are good, but this book misses the mark of being Biblically accurate. Early on they said that you can only love others as much as you love yourself and I highly disagree with that statement. We can love others because God first loved us. Our love does not come from us, it comes from Him.

The book overall presents some good, and thought provoking ideas about pain in our lives. While this is good, the underlying teaching taking place is faulty and I recommend reading this book with great discernment or even skipping it to read The Problem of Pain by C.S. Lewis.

[Valerie · Rating 2 out of 5]

By Drs Paul Meier and David Henderson, Finding Purpose Beyond Our Pain is instruction and encouragement in moving victoriously beyond the most common struggles in our lives. The "common struggles" addressed are: Injustice, Rejection, Loneliness, Loss, Discipline, Failure, and Death.

The conclusion was very clear and concise. They end the book with "two important truths to hold on to while you focus on the purpose beyond your pain: (1) the presence of Christ is sufficient, and (2) the promise of heaven is secure." Had the book been more about these two points and less psychological, I would have enjoyed it more.

This book didn't deliver anything special to me. Had I read it 15-20 years ago, my "take-away value" would have been more significant.

[Alisa · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good book. Basically goes over 7 "pains" we feel in our live that we can help use to make us become a greater person. My favorite section was on how our live and faith can be like a personal training program.

[Ann Louise Tisdale-Ramos · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you want to feel "normal" for the pain you feel because it fits into some category, this is a great book. About half way through I realized that I did I not need the book to address what I was feeling and the ultimate purpose if picking a book like this.

[Liz · Rating 4 out of 5]

Advance copy from Thomas Nelson

[LaVonne Earl · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book! Pain can often drag us into a black hole, learning that there is a higher purpose keeps one from losing their footing.