The Last of His Mind: A Year in the Shadow of Alzheimer’s

by John Thorndike

NEW EDITIONS Paperback ISBN 978–0804012362 / Electronic ISBN 978–0804041201 Joe Thorndike was managing editor of Life at the height of its popularity immediately following World War II. He was the founder of American Heritage and Horizon magazines, the author of three books, and the editor of a dozen more. But at age 92, in the space of six months he stopped reading or writing or carrying on detailed conversations. He could no longer tell time or make a phone call. He was convinced that the governor of Massachusetts had come to visit and was in the refrigerator. Five million Americans suffer from Alzheimer’s, and like many of them, Joe Thorndike’s one great desire was to remain in his own house. To honor his wish, his son John left his own home and moved into his father’s upstairs bedroom on Cape Cod. For a year, in a house filled with file cabinets, photos, and letters, John explored his father’s mind, his parents’ divorce, and his mother’s secrets. The Last of His Mind is the bittersweet account of a son’s final year with his father, and a candid portrait of an implacable disease. It’s the ordeal of Alzheimer’s that draws father and son close, closer than they have been since John was a boy. At the end, when Joe’s heart stops beating, John’s hand is on his chest, and a story of painful decline has become a portrait of deep family ties, caregiving, and love.

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction

256 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2009

About the author

I grew up in Connecticut, read a thousand novels as a child and always wanted to write one. My mother was a reader, my father an editor and writer, and our house was filled with books. After four desperate years at a New England prep school I went to Harvard, wrote some fiction, studied night and day. Then a master's degree from Columbia, two years in the Peace Corps and a year of doctoral studies at NYU, brought to an end by marriage, parenthood and the delirious Sixties. In 1970 my wife and I moved to an isolated farm in Chile, where we lived for two years, raising chickens, growing potatoes and pursuing the complete back-to-the-land experience. When we divorced in 1974, I wound up with custody of our son and settled with him in Athens, Ohio, where I farmed for ten years, built houses for ten, and wrote.

My first two books were novels. Anna Delaney’s Child and The Potato Baron. My third book, Another Way Home, is a memoir about my wife’s schizophrenia and the years I spent raising my son. A second memoir, The Last of His Mind, recounts my father’s last year, in which dementia stripped him of memory, language and self-awareness.

My third novel was A Hundred Fires in Cuba, set in Havana during the early years of the Cuban Revolution.

I’ve written a pair of fictional memoirs (or as some would say, reality fiction) that follow my mother's life: The World Against Her Skin and The Passionate Sister. Recently I published a revised edition of The Last of His Mind, as Alzheimer’s remains such a piercing topic for so many.

You’ll find more about my books, and me, at johnthorndike.com

Reviews

[Richard · Rating 3 out of 5]

When I first read about this book about a man caring for his father who suffered from Alzheimer's, I was immediately interested. But when it finally came time to pick up a copy, I had second thoughts. Was this story going to be a big bummer?

Happily I was engrossed from the earliest chapters. Of course, it was not a laugh riot, but I found it to be intensely personal and honest. I have never cared for someone with Alzheimer's but I have cared for a loved one in hospice at the end of her life so I found this caretaker's often embarrassing thought process and its ramifications on his whole life to be legitimate.

[Yenta Knows · Rating 4 out of 5]

A harrowing read. Thorndike spares no detail in narrating his father's last year, however sad or ugly. The book brought back grievous memories of my parents' demises, one from Alzheimer's, the other from heart failure.

I couldn't have written this book. I would not have wanted to describe the humiliations of old age: the senility, the anger, the loss of bowel and bladder control. And I would not have been so forthright about my own failures.

I couldn't have written the book. But I am glad Thorndike did.

[Dolores · Rating 5 out of 5]

John Thorndike's father was a former managing editor of Life magazine and a prominent author and editor, but at ninety-one he suffered from Alzheimer's, and his health and mental abilities were rapidly declining. John moved into an upstairs bedroom of his father's Cape Cod home in order to care for him. This book is a memoir of those final months....touching, tragic, and beautifully written.

[Gary Goosman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Recently, John Thorndike came to our small, community senior center in Amesville to talk about writing this book. As a local resident he is known for many things, but not everyone is familiar with his books. So, it came as a real treat to hear him discuss his work with a wide array of people and with the same honesty that appears in this memoir.

I loved the book. Having spent some time with my father near the end of his life (albeit with no dementia) it covered many of the same emotions and challenges that I experienced. It does so in a straight forward and clear way that is enjoyable despite the nature of the process. I also appreciated his description of uncovering his family’s past during the time spent with his dad.

The story is one familiar to many families and in need of more discussion. John presents that narrative in a unvarnished way and lays bare the individual struggles as well as those we are facing as a society.

[Shel B · Rating 4 out of 5]

I had to read this book for school and as my mom is currently taking care of my granddad, I see a lot of them in this and what's to come. It wasn't wholly perfect, there were certain parts where my interest dipped or where I was confused how Thorndike got from Point A to Point B, but this book has a sentimental place in my heart. It's one of the few assigned readings I find myself coming back to. It warmed my heart, as cliche as that is, and it brought me into a world that I've mostly been an onlooker of. It was open and "real." I enjoyed reading this the way you enjoy fuzzy socks and fireplaces during December.

[Wayne · Rating 4 out of 5]

It seems strange to say that you really like a book written about the demise of a man's father but this book was well written and heartfelt. I'm going through the same process with a parent and John expresses the trials and emotions experienced during the drawn out process of caring for a parent with Alzheimers.

[Karen Bunge · Rating 5 out of 5]

Having taken care of several relatives with dementia I really identified with his book. I applaud him for sharing all his feelings of anger, guilt, and regret. Caregiving is the most rewarding but difficult job I have ever done. However it takes a tremendous toll on one emotionally and always feel completely alone. It is good to hear that it is normal to have this conflict in feelings

[Ellie Snyder · Rating 4 out of 5]

SO GOOD! So heartbreaking but such a good read. An incredibly point of view of aging from a point of love but also discovery. Hits extra close to home knowing a grandparent that experienced this decline so trigger warning to those who can relate to that. But overall really well written and engaging the whole time.

[Oriyah N · Rating 3 out of 5]

An interesting and quick read, I knew from the beginning that this book wouldn't be a keeper, though I couldn't immediately put my finger on a particular reason. It was well written, contained many entertaining or interest-drawing anecdotes, etc.

As with most memoirs, I felt a bit like a voyeur peeking into a world that, frankly, was clearly none of my business. But then, that's the draw of a memoir to begin with. I think here, the difference lay not in the information being revealed, but more in the WHY of the revelation. Most authors include details from their personal lives, moments that they themselves experienced. If they reveal the private details of their friends and family members in the process, at least the telling of their own personal tale seems to warrant the yanking down of those curtains that shield those people, removing their privacy.

But here, Thorndike, writes about the end of his father's life, trying to make sense of his and his father's experiences and relationship, something he does in a most compassionate and honest way. At the same time, part of this process includes his personal quest for more information, and his research [read: digging up dirt to satisfy what he clearly identifies as his own personal curiosity] on his parents' private lives. And there is something about that which fails to sit rightly with me.

Beyond this, the story seems to be not as much a tale about Alzheimer's disease as much as it is a tale of dying, with Alzheimer's playing a strong backdrop, much in the way the movie Titanic was more about the people in it, and the sinking of the Titanic's playing only a supporting role. I suppose I expected the book to be a sort of case study on Alzheimer's, rather than a personal account that, at the end of the day is less informative, and more emotionally evocative. The book certainly brought back memories and emotions from the end of my grandfather's life - his failing body and mind, and the experiences, both external and internal, that went along with that chapter. I don't have any problem revisiting that time, in that it is practically accessible in my heart and mind, and in that I don't have emotional resistance or reason to avoid it.

But I expected that this work would take me down a different path than it did in reality, and therefore, though a well executed work, I found it lacking.

[Nklein98 · Rating 4 out of 5]

Watching my mother's decline from dementia and the impact it has had on my family, especially my Dad, made me hesitate to pick up "The Las of His Mind". This past weekend was a "good" one for my mother and so I finally felt equipped, and almost eager, to start reading and sharing John Thorndike's experience dealing with his own father's Alzheimers. Most of us going through this heartbreaking experience really don't need to know the medical reasons why or how this disease has struck a loved one, but we do need to know that there are others who share the range of emotions and questions that consume us as we face each day. I loved the way Thorndike tells the story of the his father's life before the onset and how it allows him to reflect upon his own adult life and ponder the thought that someday he may be in the same situation. It is an intimate account that at times made me feel as if I had intruded upon something so personal that I should back out of the room. It runs the gamut of anger and dislike to the tender cradling of someone who has always discouraged personal touch and now needs to be treated not only with love, but with respect. This story was also personal to me as the author lives in my son's hometown but he has also lived in New Mexico. This is a book that I will share and recommend to all who have aging parents and just feel as if they are adrift on an uncharted sea, can't see the shore and feel as if there is no one who knows they are so alone. The book ends with the joy of the future and the promise not to forget those who have enriched our past.

[Ann · Rating 4 out of 5]

The author sets the tone of this book from the first paragraph, the first sentence. The obviously well-observed description of his sleeping father's face, the fact that his father is napping, something his father does not believe in. We know that this man, this man his son has known all his life, is changing. We also know that this son honors his father. With a capital H.

I've marked so many lyrical and grace-filled and heart-wrenching passages in this book. From the first page:

“My father sleeps through the December afternoon … I stand beside the bed, listening to his shallow breaths and watching his old face: his half-open mouth, the crust in the corners of his eyes, his patchy skin and tumultuous eyebrows.

“’Dad? Do you want to wake up?’

“He opens his good eye but doesn’t say anything, just stares without moving. Outside, the long Vermont dusk is settling.”

And my favorite (also featuring Joe Thorndike's 'good eye'):

“After I tucked him into bed he lay still, looking up at me with both his good eye and his quavery, half-closed bad eye. 'This is the night when everything is supposed to get dark,’ he said. 'Unlike all the other nights.’

I begged to differ. I said it got dark every night.

For a while he considered this, then nodded faintly. 'Maybe so.’”

[AnnaMay · Rating 2 out of 5]

It was interesting to gain the perspective of a full-time caregiver (and one that isn't a spouse).

I liked how the book was organized by month. That helped me grasp the passage of time accurately.

It seems the book is almost more about 1)Thorndike's perception of his parents' marriages, 2)the effects those had on his upbringing, and 3)his dad's aloofness, moreso than Alzheimer's.

Alzheimer's was kind of a theme that ran through the entire book, but the main story seemed to be more of a memoir-type of the son. I still found that interesting, because it tied in with how his caring for his dad brought all of the past right to the surface.

I'm guessing that whenever someone cares for a parent, they revisit many of the troubling feelings they've kept hidden in regard to their relationship with that parent.

I appreciated how Thorndike didn't spare any details about the condition of his dad and its effects. Those who are close to someone with advanced Alzheimer's don't get the perk of having any details spared (cleaning up after bathroom messes, helping them dress, etc.), so it's nice to be able to read the graphic parts and feel validated.

[Catherine · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thorndike’s ninety-two-year-old, former magazine publisher father has Alzheimer’s. He volunteers to be his father’s caregiver through the last few months of his life.

The author explores and reflects on his childhood, the events that led to the end of his parents’ marriage, as well as his intimate thoughts and emotions he experiences during his father’s illness. Although his thoughts were expressed in a forthright manner, at times I thought he was a bit of a whiner, expressing angst over long past events in what some might consider trivial problems of someone who has had many advantages in his life.

There’s a lot of knockdown brutal honesty in this book. If you’ve been a caregiver to someone close, you will probably find much to relate to. Thorndike’s memoir is beautifully written and would probably provide some comfort to others caring for elderly loved ones whether they have Alzheimer’s or some other debilitating illness.

[Deby Su · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am thoroughly pleased that I read this book. It was well written and was a pleasure for someone who enjoys words and language in general. John Thorndike was insightful and encouraging and never was the story sad or depressing...quite the contrary. John's story, and the opportunity of 'living' with his father during his last year, was pleasant and hopeful, and once again, encouraging in a way that made me hope I could be so relaxed and able to live in my moments instead of rushing through them on my way to the next. John learned this attribute throughout this time and I believe he was pleased and surprised at himself. I am hopeful that this story will stay with me for quite a while.

[Raul Sanchez · Rating 5 out of 5]

I expected the story of a man caring for his Alzheimer's-afflicted father during his last year of life would be depressing. But John Thorndike's exquisitely written memoir serves as a guide for a journey most of us will likely travel, both as caretaker and patient. Wisdom comes with a price. In this sincere and sensitive book, John Thorndike shows us that even the most difficult circumstances can enrich us.

[Melanie · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a very interesting book and the point of view of the author was also very interesting. This subject is very close to me as my
Grandmother also suffers from Alzheimers. I enjoyed reading about this first hand account.

[Beth · Rating 4 out of 5]

A difficult, but interesting book to read. I imagine people who have cared for or are caring for someone with Alzheimer's would be interested to compare their feeling and reactions with those in this book.

[Amy · Rating 3 out of 5]

I read this book for my final honors research paper. I connected Joe with how his experience with Alzheimer's was similar/different to the typical experience of other Alzheimer's . Overall, I thought it was an alright book. I wasn't the biggest fan or anything, but it was fine for my research.

[Donna · Rating 2 out of 5]

mediocre at best.

[Serena]

Amazing and powerful.I gained a lot of insight into the caregiver's role with a parent with this devastating disease.

[Angela · Rating 3 out of 5]

Touching book chronicling John Thorndike's father's last year of life and the lessons Thorndike learns from his dad.

[Katherine Spivey · Rating 4 out of 5]

Helpful -- facing this issue right now with my mom. Evocative and disturbing.

[Cynthia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Beautiful memoir.