Finding Your Best Identity: A short Christian introduction to identity, sexuality and gender

by Andrew Bunt

Who are you? And how can you find who you are?

Andrew Bunt has wrestled with these questions. At one point in his childhood, he thought he might be a girl in a boy’s body. As he grew up and discovered he’s same-sex attracted, the world started to tell him that his sexuality is his identity. And for many years, he believed the lie that he was a freak and a weirdo, assuming that’s what everyone thought of him.


In this short Christian introduction to identity, Andrew explores and examines different ways we can discover who we are. Blending his personal story with careful Bible teaching and genuine cultural awareness, this is a book to get conversations going and help us all understand our best identity.


With questions for discussion and reflection, and an application exercise to end the book, Finding Your Best Identity is a practical and profound introduction to some of the biggest questions we all face.

Genres: Christian, Nonfiction, Sexuality

104 pages, Kindle Edition

Published November 18, 2022

Reviews

[Matty Lavelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

A short but incredibly helpful book on a really important and relevant topic. Bunt writes with care and insight, tackling the idea behind much of our thoughts today - persuasively and pastorally showing God's identity is better

[Matthew McGill · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent little book on identity. The author explores the question: “how do we find who we are?” as his primary thesis. He evaluates “others decide”, “I decide”, or “God decides” as 3 possible ways to answer that question. This short little book is packed with dense statements that have helped me reflect on the good news that my identity is rooted in what God thinks of me, not what others or even myself think about who I am. I will routinely come back and visit this book for years to come.

[Kara · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is short-75 pages, but the content is biblically spot on. The author is a celibate, gay man, and he writes addressing identity perspective coming from 3 different viewpoints- “Others decide”, “I decide”, or “God decides.” He then walks through each description. I was glad to have read Alan Noble’s book “You Are Not Hour Own” and Kelly Kapic’s book “You’re Only Human” prior-these both gave added background knowledge to enrich the understanding of this book. If you’ve been a Christian for any amount of time, the messages given in this book aren’t new, but they are laid out clearly, and looking specifically through the lens of sexuality (though you could apply the perspectives to any issue.) I think this is a great book for parents, and for those working with youth, but again, the concepts could apply to anyone, I just think they would be especially helpful for these 2 groups of people- and especially helpful coming from the author who has the lived experience. I think it’s helpful the author also gives additional resources for further reading at the end of the book, and find the back story of the author’s insight coming out of a talk by Tim Keller interesting.

[Keegan Reckinger · Rating 2 out of 5]

Author doesn’t say much, honestly. He lives in a world of a “right”/“wrong” dichotomy with no space for gray. Misappropriates some scripture, disregarding the literary genre and function. Rather than a man that has been spiritually “awakened” to “reality” he uses anecdotal evidence to reveal that he truly is living a self-deprecating life and avoiding making conscious decisions/choices by defaulting to whatever he is told by the word of the Bible. He leads out by illustrating, in his past, he let outside voices determine who he is. He articulates his thoughts in a way which make it seem he is beyond that when, in reality, the only thing that has changed is the outside voices he is allowing to form himself. This book wishes to account for the nuances of individually lived life, but in reality this book glosses over them; nothing new.
Being completely candid, Modernist Boomers and Gen X’ers will probably love this book.

[Andrew · Rating 2 out of 5]

A light weight and pale copy of some of Tim Keller’s material. Well intentioned, unfortunately not particularly effective. Perhaps the author should wait a few years before wiring about himself. I know that is what Keller did.

[CEG1333 · Rating 5 out of 5]

Good little book. Not just information but also questions we can ask ourselves so that we can live our best identity.

This book has many truths such as we are loved by GOD. We are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139).

I need to re-read this book!

[Drew Hinton · Rating 4 out of 5]

I got the opportunity to meet Andrew Bunt recently at a training he was teaching at. He was a great guy and an even better teacher, so I was excited to dive into his book! He even signed it! Let me first say that I have never struggled with same sex attraction or gender dysphoria, but I still found this book really helpful. It convicted me in ways I wasn't expecting. It's thorough, structured well, personal, practical, and simple yet profound. Bunt's explanations as to why God is for heterosexual marriages or celibate singleness are clear and make a lot of sense. Bunt is compassionate and loving to those struggling, treating them in a humanizing way. Whether this is something you're struggling with or not, I still find this a great, quick read! Anyone can learn something about where we find our best identity.

[Kate · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good introduction to finding your identity and was good at highlighting the fact that our identity is found in God. While everything else can change and alter over time, God doesn't change, he is the same 'yesterday, today and forever.' And that is an amazing truth to hold on to.

This book didn't go into a lot of detail, but rather asks the reader a couple of questions at the end of each chapter, so it was, at times, left up to the reader how they would move forwards with their lives. It may be that some readers may not be in the right mental space to answer these questions and so giving some examples of how to move forwards may have been a good idea.

It was a good introduction to what the Bible says on the topic though.

[Andy Bond · Rating 5 out of 5]

For those who have engaged in the works of Timothy Keller the underlying foundation will not be new, as Keller has made the work on identity formation by philosopher Charles Taylor accessible to many who would never read Taylor's work.

Andrew Bunt has made this subject even more accessible and interweaves his own story which make a powerful combination.

This short book is one that I would recommend to Christians wrestling with any issues of identity, since identity is not formed in a vacuum, traditional cultures did it one way, contemporary cultures do it in another, but followers of Jesus are called to find our identity in Him.

Such a good book on a vital issue for our time.

[Jasmine Timm · Rating 5 out of 5]

Short, clear, and helpful book on how to best find our identity as human beings. The author hones in particularly on how gender and identity play a role in the West’s definition of human identity and he has a lot to say both from his personal story and pastoral experience. The tone is gentle and gracious while also being clear. I appreciate the practical help offered at the end of the book on how to apply the concepts explored throughout the previous chapters. This can be read in about a day and is worth every Christian’s time, whether they are seeking to understand human identity or how to care for friends who identify with the LGBTQ community.

[Robin · Rating 5 out of 5]

My endorsement:
'Andrew has written something remarkable and significant. With heartfelt honesty about his own experiences, he lays out a compassionate and clear case for a God-given identity. This is essential reading for anyone working with young people who may be struggling with sexuality or gender issues, but will also be deeply challenging for anyone who wants to better understand their Christian identity.'

[Abram Martin · Rating 4 out of 5]

A short , but powerful book on identity. "From this root, he distinguishes between a healthy, life- giving identity and an identity from the wrong , wayward root. Showing how not just to integrate but also to submit our human identities to Christ. Andrew also unpicksthe false duality between the harmful erasure of sexual or gender identity and its total rulership over our lives." Except from the forward by David Bennett

[Bo Ties · Rating 5 out of 5]

A short and helpful book for people wrestling through identity (not just specifically sexuality or gender). He walks through three ways we form our identity: Others decide, I decide, God decides. he shows why the first two are unsatisfying and full of pressure, and how truly understanding God's design for us brings freedom and peace. The book ends with a helpful action plan to reinforce the God-given identity.

Highly recommended!

[Doug Hanna · Rating 5 out of 5]

SO GOOD!

A brief explanation of the Christian's identity in Christ, comparing cultural narratives of identity (especially about sexuality and gender) to the joy-inducing, hopeful way the Bible describes our identity.

[Faustina Edward · Rating 4 out of 5]

Amazing resource for youth leaders and parents! Really short book but took me forever because it’s not one I could passively read as it was part of prep for youth series on gender and sexuality!

Andrew is such an amazing speaker and this is the first book of his I’ve read!

[Elise Thompson · Rating 5 out of 5]

An uplifting Bible study and one that is focussed on respect, love, and identity in Christ. I had the privilege of meeting the author at an event recently and his testimony is one we should listen to. Great for small groups, affirming young people or LGBTQ+ Christians feeling lost or shamed.

[Alastair Gooderham · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a helpful short primer on this issue. Pastorally suitable to give away to those struggling and those who need to think through where they get their sense of identity from.

[Bhoke · Rating 4 out of 5]

Quick read and great start for learning about the topic.

[Ruth · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was an excellent short book on identity that I throughly enjoyed reading and would highly recommend. Short, to the point and practically applicable.