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Woman First, Family Always
A happily married mother of ten shares real-life wisdom, insight, advice, and inspiration designed to help women combat the inevitable stresses of daily life, explaining how to fulfill one's own needs while enhancing one's family relationships, achieve emotional balance, nurture the spirit, raise well-adjusted children, strengthen one's bond with a spouse, and more. 200,000 first printing.
256 pages, Hardcover
First published December 13, 2005
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews
October 2, 2007
This book promises simple ideas and basic concepts behind living a balanced, organized and fulfilling life from a "happily married mother of 10". I really wanted to love this book but I thought it lacked realism, honesty and substance. I cruised through this book very quickly--the author deals with most topics in a pretty overhand fashion. Much of the "wisdom" the author shares is obvious stuff for the average person...and she doesn't do much but scratch the surface on a lot of things I would've loved to hear about. For instance, just how does she get laundry done for 10 kids every week? What job does her husband have so they can afford 10 kids to begin with? Where are the concrete facts on how she really gets all these people out the door in the morning? How many bathrooms do they have?? Really, her editors should've insisted on further detail because it doesn't add up--how can one person have enough time to maintain a neat and well-decorated home, chauffeur a bunch of kids to activities and sports, have date nights with the hubby, volunteer, daily workouts, manicures, etc. I suspect that she enlists her older kids to take deal with the grunt work of daily living just like my Grandma used to do with her 7 kids.
I think the author is a prime example of the lie sold to all of us American mothers: you CAN have it all! Sorry, something's gotta give for most of us. And by "most of us", I mean non-wealthy families. On the other hand, I really admired the author's general message about taking care of yourself and your relationship with your spouse first, so that your family has a truly strong foundation. It's true that sometimes when we get married, we forget how important our close friendships are--not to mention nurturing our own sense of self or cultivating a fulfilling marriage. She was careful to remind the reader that every normal family has a cycle of ups and downs, no matter how organized or spiritual the family members are--a critical notion to hold onto when the circumstances of life seem insurmountable.
I think the author is a prime example of the lie sold to all of us American mothers: you CAN have it all! Sorry, something's gotta give for most of us. And by "most of us", I mean non-wealthy families. On the other hand, I really admired the author's general message about taking care of yourself and your relationship with your spouse first, so that your family has a truly strong foundation. It's true that sometimes when we get married, we forget how important our close friendships are--not to mention nurturing our own sense of self or cultivating a fulfilling marriage. She was careful to remind the reader that every normal family has a cycle of ups and downs, no matter how organized or spiritual the family members are--a critical notion to hold onto when the circumstances of life seem insurmountable.
July 4, 2019
I truly wanted to love this book. As a struggling mother of two - one with special needs, I picked up this book thinking, if this mother of TEN can slay this life AND write a book about it, then maybe she has the secret that can help me get my head above water.
While I think she does give some good advice when it comes to marriage, unfortunately, the advice she gave for mothers just wasn't realistic for me, personally - & for plenty of women I know.
Telling exhausted, sleep-deprived, & isolated mothers on low incomes with next to no support system that doing a better job at cleaning their houses, arching their eyebrows, signing up for an exercise class or miraculously finding a way to even get out of the house, & to get more sleep or take a nap (that one was laughable), will solve their problems screamed privilege & left me feeling even worse about my struggle.
I think it's wonderful if you have all of the tools & support necessary to champion life as a mom with a house full of children & a happy marriage. It's a beautiful story. I just don't know that it is relatable or realistic for a lot of women.
While I think she does give some good advice when it comes to marriage, unfortunately, the advice she gave for mothers just wasn't realistic for me, personally - & for plenty of women I know.
Telling exhausted, sleep-deprived, & isolated mothers on low incomes with next to no support system that doing a better job at cleaning their houses, arching their eyebrows, signing up for an exercise class or miraculously finding a way to even get out of the house, & to get more sleep or take a nap (that one was laughable), will solve their problems screamed privilege & left me feeling even worse about my struggle.
I think it's wonderful if you have all of the tools & support necessary to champion life as a mom with a house full of children & a happy marriage. It's a beautiful story. I just don't know that it is relatable or realistic for a lot of women.
May 22, 2019
Kathryn Sansone is a mother of ten who wants to pass along a bit of her “real-life wisdom” to others. These are practical tips and insights to help wives and mothers get through each day. Sansone has divided Woman First, Family Always into three topic headings: Your Self, Your Marriage, and Your Family and Kids. Within each heading she imparts her wisdom for running and improving your household.
In "Your Self," Sansone covers topics such as establishing limits, asking for help, friendships, relaxation, time management, creating a clean and comfortable home, exercise, pregnancy, and positive thinking. In each short two- to four-page section, she covers each idea, relates it to how she deals with the issue in her own life, and gives information on how to make decisions and incorporate it into your life.
"Your Marriage" discusses things like staying in tune and attached, the power of respectful communication, keeping the romance alive, and treating each other in a special way. Again, most of the information is simple and direct, but some of the tips may be things you might not have considered before or haven’t tried.
Finally, "Your Family and Kids" covers topics such as enriching your children’s lives, mealtimes, house rules, family time, coping in the real world, teaching children time and money management, healthy habits, and school.
Sansone incorporates warmth, wit, and basic information. This isn’t groundbreaking, it isn’t something that most of us couldn’t have figured out on our own. But it is comforting to hear it imparted from a woman with ten children, someone who has been there and walked in the shoes she’s speaking from. Her tone is inspirational and motivating.
My main criticism of Woman First, Family Always is that Sansone doesn’t allow herself to get vulnerable. She doesn’t really let the reader into her life in a nuts and bolts way. How does she accomplish all of this within the framework of her family? It would have been more refreshing to see her struggles as well as the positive things she does with her family. This would provide more realism, and the reader could identify with her better and think, “if she can do this, overcome the obstacles, and still come out positive, then I can too.” It just never reaches that point. The advice is good and interesting, but it doesn’t go enough into depth about the practical day-to-day life of running a large family.
In "Your Self," Sansone covers topics such as establishing limits, asking for help, friendships, relaxation, time management, creating a clean and comfortable home, exercise, pregnancy, and positive thinking. In each short two- to four-page section, she covers each idea, relates it to how she deals with the issue in her own life, and gives information on how to make decisions and incorporate it into your life.
"Your Marriage" discusses things like staying in tune and attached, the power of respectful communication, keeping the romance alive, and treating each other in a special way. Again, most of the information is simple and direct, but some of the tips may be things you might not have considered before or haven’t tried.
Finally, "Your Family and Kids" covers topics such as enriching your children’s lives, mealtimes, house rules, family time, coping in the real world, teaching children time and money management, healthy habits, and school.
Sansone incorporates warmth, wit, and basic information. This isn’t groundbreaking, it isn’t something that most of us couldn’t have figured out on our own. But it is comforting to hear it imparted from a woman with ten children, someone who has been there and walked in the shoes she’s speaking from. Her tone is inspirational and motivating.
My main criticism of Woman First, Family Always is that Sansone doesn’t allow herself to get vulnerable. She doesn’t really let the reader into her life in a nuts and bolts way. How does she accomplish all of this within the framework of her family? It would have been more refreshing to see her struggles as well as the positive things she does with her family. This would provide more realism, and the reader could identify with her better and think, “if she can do this, overcome the obstacles, and still come out positive, then I can too.” It just never reaches that point. The advice is good and interesting, but it doesn’t go enough into depth about the practical day-to-day life of running a large family.
February 6, 2020
All her advice was good; it sometimes seemed a little too perfect though. Part of the problem might have been that I am quite a bit older than she was when she wrote the book, and in a completely different stage of life (no little children anymore). Still, all in all, a worthwhile book to read.
July 11, 2020
Horrible- this woman is a liar, heard she had a nanny, didn't nurse her child because she thought it was selfish to her husband, what a strange strange way of life
August 16, 2020
Libro para releer. Muchos tips fabulosos para la maternidad. Me encantó.
December 27, 2024
I remember reading this soon after I gave birth to my twins, about nine or ten years ago. I had gone from being a mom of one to a mom of three, and I hoped this book would give me some inspiration and tips for the practicalities of being a mother of multiple little ones. It certainly left a lasting impression!
The author seemed like a really nice person, and her family is obviously fortunate to have her, but I couldn't relate to Mrs. Sansone at all. The tone of the entire book was self-congratulatory, bragging about her many accomplishments: how she has so much energy, is on so many committees, plans her days down to the smallest detail, cleans every nook and cranny of her home, weight trains, runs a super-successful cookie business, somehow has time for romantic evenings and bubble baths, etc. It left me shaking my head in wonder. She encouraged moms to do the various things she does, but she never came down to Planet Earth and explained HOW she does it, other than her extraordinary energy level.
I have recently heard the term "humble-brag," and I think that's an apt description of this book. If I knew I'd be reading a woman's glowing praise of her own self, I wouldn't have read it.
The author seemed like a really nice person, and her family is obviously fortunate to have her, but I couldn't relate to Mrs. Sansone at all. The tone of the entire book was self-congratulatory, bragging about her many accomplishments: how she has so much energy, is on so many committees, plans her days down to the smallest detail, cleans every nook and cranny of her home, weight trains, runs a super-successful cookie business, somehow has time for romantic evenings and bubble baths, etc. It left me shaking my head in wonder. She encouraged moms to do the various things she does, but she never came down to Planet Earth and explained HOW she does it, other than her extraordinary energy level.
I have recently heard the term "humble-brag," and I think that's an apt description of this book. If I knew I'd be reading a woman's glowing praise of her own self, I wouldn't have read it.
April 15, 2008
Whether we work at home or go to the office everyday, women everywhere perform a delicate balancing act each day. We spend a great deal of time hurrying around trying to get everyone to the appropriate soccer practice or ballet class, ensuring homework is completed, making sure that a somewhat healthy meal is on the table, and trying to make our way through the household clutter all while trying to also being a loving wife, a caring friend, and holding onto a little bit of us. Often, we end up just feeling frustrated, drained, and completely unproductive.
Woman First, Family Always says that the key to being a good mother, wife, and friend is to take a little time for yourself and to recognize when your expectations are just too high. The author is a mother of ten children who has learned through trial and error that if she isn't happy and okay with being herself that she can't possibly be there for anyone else. The really ironic thing about her story is that she seems to have found her life more overwhelming when she only had a couple of children, before she started to take time for herself and ask for help when she needed it.
Woman First, Family Always says that the key to being a good mother, wife, and friend is to take a little time for yourself and to recognize when your expectations are just too high. The author is a mother of ten children who has learned through trial and error that if she isn't happy and okay with being herself that she can't possibly be there for anyone else. The really ironic thing about her story is that she seems to have found her life more overwhelming when she only had a couple of children, before she started to take time for herself and ask for help when she needed it.
January 12, 2012
Sansone says it in her intro -- she has no secret. This is a collection of common-sense tips that every busy mom should probably be reminded of every so-often. They probably aren't anything you haven't already heard or considered, but it's nice to have them all in one place. It's a pretty fast read. I found it comforting to know that when she had 3 children aged 4 and under she felt as though she was just struggling to survive every day, but when she figured out how to take time for herself, she found added meaning and vigor for life.
Some that I especially appreciated:
- If you aren't taking care of yourself, nobody is getting the best side of you, and you can't help others as well.
- Work hard at keeping up friends and family. She talked about how important friends, family, and a social life are to women. It made me see the importance of Visiting Teaching in a different light. Unfortunately, I am one who needs it to force me to socialize. I don't know. Maybe a lot of us need motivation to get out of the house when we feel we're so otherwise busy.
Some that I especially appreciated:
- If you aren't taking care of yourself, nobody is getting the best side of you, and you can't help others as well.
- Work hard at keeping up friends and family. She talked about how important friends, family, and a social life are to women. It made me see the importance of Visiting Teaching in a different light. Unfortunately, I am one who needs it to force me to socialize. I don't know. Maybe a lot of us need motivation to get out of the house when we feel we're so otherwise busy.
February 20, 2012
I was really disappointed in this book. After seeing her on Oprah I thought she would have a lot more practical tips in the book about how to manage a home and family. In my opinion, it is just a lot of stuff about her philosophies - none of which proved a very thrilling read. There are very few actual tips or concrete ideas that a person can take from this book and integrate into their lives.
We all know that we need to provide healthy meals, be organized, instill our values - but that's all this was - a basic call to do these things - not practical applications.
Oh - I did get 2 tips - make exercise first in your day; and 2 - put buckets and shelves all over the garage for all the sports gear. This way kids aren't running around wondering where it is.
We all know that we need to provide healthy meals, be organized, instill our values - but that's all this was - a basic call to do these things - not practical applications.
Oh - I did get 2 tips - make exercise first in your day; and 2 - put buckets and shelves all over the garage for all the sports gear. This way kids aren't running around wondering where it is.
July 11, 2011
This book was written by Kathryn Sansone, a mother of 10 children. "Happily married and the mother of ten, Kathryn Sansone is centered, fit, organized, and beautiful. But Supermom? Absolutely not. Welcome to her club." It was cute book and had some handy tips in it. I enjoyed how she priorized her chapters by 1) Self, 2) Marriage and 3) Family - how we should order our lives. I agree that you need to take care of yourself first! I believe that women do not do that enough. I feel motivated to do more strength training from her story. I felt regenerized toward my husband and our marriage. It was an easy, fun read.
July 14, 2008
I love the concept of this book! I completely agree that a woman needs to take care of herself before being able to care for her husband and family, although it is hard for me to put into action this principle. I feel that as a mom I need to take time for myself to be healthier and happier, but i also feel that I would be selfish and neglectful of the ones who count on me if I did. This amazing woman helps me realize that I need to be the best for me AND for them!!! I recommend this book to any mom!
April 5, 2008
This book really put life as a mother into perspective. It also made me feel like I was OK. When we take care of ourselves first, not in a selfish way, we are able to take care of our family like they need.
May 3, 2008
I didn't feel like we really get to know this great woman and mother. While she offers great wisdom for women, it is lacking in so many areas and levels. She could have at least included her detailed exercise regimen and diet which is what created her 15 minutes of fame to begin with!
December 4, 2008
I use this book for daily inspiration. I really admire the author. The chapters are short enough to read one (or part of one) each day. She has lots of great tips for moms, or Chief Everything Officers as she has been dubbed.
November 27, 2008
This woman has 10 kids and she's normal! I found her practical ideas helpful, she's got a great perspective on taking care of yourself and then your family - with very good systems in place. I got some great ideas and it reminded me to take care of me - thanks!
July 7, 2009
I enjoyed the ideas from a mother of ten. I was tired just reading all that she accomplishes in a day. I like that she realizes how important it is for mothers to get out and have their own identity. Good quick read!
November 19, 2009
It was good practical advice from a mom who really has her hands full. The title pretty much says it all--you are/were a woman before you were a mom and you have to take care of yourself first. Quick read
August 22, 2011
Agreed with some, disagreed with some. Although I thought I agreed or was interested in more than the parts that annoyed me or that I didn't agree with. I just wonder how much more I could do if my family income was as large as hers. :)
April 9, 2013
She has some good ideas. And she is a remarkable woman. I had to keep reminding myself not to compare myself to her, though. Not that she says you should do everything like her, because she doesn't. That's just my own weakness, but it's hard to love the book when you have to try not to feel badly.
January 23, 2008
In my point of view the best advice is from those who understand. She has 10 kids, a husbnad, a fulfilling job, and happiness. You can achieve happiness if you strive for it.
January 27, 2008
Great advice for any woman trying to jugle a family, work, and church in this crazy world all while taking care of yourself as a woman.
February 5, 2008
LOVE IT! Learn so many things in here that are practical on how to be a good Mom. Besides that, I'd love to have 1o kids like Kathryn, and exercise like she does and be in good shape.
March 8, 2008
this mother of ten has a lot to offer anyone raising a family of any size
March 30, 2008
I learned so much from this book. I thought it would make me feel like a bad wife and mother, but it actually did the opposite, and at the same time taught me a lot of what I can do better.
June 13, 2008
This was ok. I had heard most of it before. I only read it because I thought she was LDS. (She has 10 kids) As it turns out she is Catholic.
August 15, 2008
This is a favorite "self help" book. It's an easy read, like a magazine and has such great tips for raising kids, and not forgetting about yourself or your marriage.
January 31, 2009
A Catholic mother of 10, she is amazing. I love her perspective on being a woman, mother, and wife. Very inspiring!
October 12, 2010
I'm really enjoying this book. Nothing really "new" to learn, but great insights and reminders.
March 31, 2011
I highly recommend this book!! Practical AND Spiritual advice that takes the Fear out of raising a family -large or small without loosing yourself in the process.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews