Victims No Longer: Men Recovering from Incest and Other Sexual Child Abuse

by Mike Lew, Ellen Bass

For millions of men on the path to recovery, Victims No Longer is the next step.

The first book written specifically for men, Victims No Longer examines the changing cultural attitudes toward male survivors of incest and other sexual trauma. Now, in this Second Edition, this invaluable resource continues to offer compassionate and practical advice, supported by personal anecdotes and statements of male survivors. Victims No Longer helps survivors to:


Identify and validate their childhood experiences
Explore strategies of survival and healing
Work through issues such as trust, intimacy, and sexual confusion
Establish a support network for continued personal recovery
Make choices that aren't determined by abuse
Psychotherapist Mike Lew has worked with thousands of men and women in their healing from the effects of childhood sexual abuse, rape, physical violence, emotional abuse, and neglect. The development of strategies for recovery from incest and other abuse, particularly for men, has been a major focus of his work as a counselor and group leader.

Thoroughly updated and revised, and including an expanded Resources section, Victims No Longer educates survivors and professionals about the recovery process -- speaking to the pain, needs, fears, and hopes of the adult male survivor.

Genres: Psychology, Nonfiction, Abuse, Self Help, Mental Health, Sexuality, Research

352 pages, Paperback

First published November 1, 1988

Reviews

[Terri]

This is a must read book for men who were sexually abused. Loved ones and friends will benefit from reading it, also. The vignettes are not too numerous, and they are eloquent and contain enough details to illustrate the horror of what was experienced without gratuitous, lengthy descriptions of the abuse. Some of the stories do not address the abuse directly, but instead encourage the reader to work on their issues, and to have hope that they will get through the recovery process. I really cannot praise this book enough. I encourage you to look it up on Amazon and read the reviews. If you know a man who was abused, buy two copies right now...give one to him, and read the other one yourself.

[Marisa Bennett]

It is heartbreaking to know that so many sexual abuse victims are male, and that so few are willing to step forward for healing. This book was at the forefront of the field, and is still on of the best out there! I highly recommend you get this book if you are a male suffering to deal with the issues of sexual abuse, or are a woman trying to understand your partner/friend's behavior. Encourage THERAPY!!!

[John]

Victims No Longer: The Classic Guide for Men Recovering from Sexual Child Abuse by Mike Lew. For men recovering from being abused or sexually molested as children, I recommend this book. I bought this book in the first edition and read it several times. The first edition helped me so much, I'm buying the second edition and reading it again and getting much more out of it now that I am more stable and healthy. Both of the editions (first and second) helped me to be a much happier person, leaving the traumas of my youth behind me so I can live in the present and future, both of which are much better because I had this book to help me. I would suggest getting a therapist to answer any questions that may arise while you are reading this book.

[carl]

A nice addition to "The Courage to Heal" book which was primarily aimed at women.

[Paul Norris]

If this book is relevant to you or anyone close to you, I'd call it a must read.

[Richard Ferguson]

A must read for Male survivors

An in depth, balanced presentation of the challenges male survivors face and a blueprint of how to move forward and heal. I have read this book multiple times with new insights each time. Sometimes hard to read it covers many difficult subjects that a survivor needs to face. Highly recommended for those just starting the journey and those that think they have arrived.

[John]

Important reading for those who had any inappropriate things happen to them as a child. This book is really helpful as a man particularly, as it can feel especially hard to open up about the sexually traumatic things that happen to us. This book gives you a language, vocabulary, and a container to explore your innermost pains in a therapeutic way.

[PJ]

I doubted whether to publicly rate this, if you came here looking for answers to the doubts and fears that have arisen in your journey, this book is an amazing work of wisdom that is extending a hand to you. There are answers on the other side. Good luck.

[Flower]

Interesting book that opened my eyes to a silent crime in this country. A crime that is not talked about but effects way more people than I could have ever imagined.

[Kenn Chaplin]

I'm still reading this, coming back to it again and again - a priceless resource!

[Beth]

I am a Licensed Mental Health Counselor working with trauma clients and abuse. I will read reviews of books, read the books myself and give those books as homework for my clients and get their reviews to give to other clients having the same issues. The following is a review by one of my clients that was very helpful.

"This book does a great job of going in depth on various topics regarding childhood sexual abuse. It is beneficial for anyone that has directly experienced CSA, knows someone that has been affected by CSA or if you’re not sure what happened to you, this book will surely have something beneficial to offer you. This is not a book that can be read in one sitting. I would encourage anyone reading it to take their time, as it is a heavy topic with plenty of survivor testimony that can be triggering. The author does a wonderful job of addressing this subject in a way that helped me feel safe and understood. In fact, a large amount of the book is about making sense of CSA and giving you hands on tasks that you can apply on your own road to recovery. This book has helped me progress on my road to recovery and it will most likely help you too. "

[Conrad]

Self help book that read like a textbook. I found a lot of information in sections about when your partner is a survivor that i believevis useful for any trauma a partner is dealing with. The most interesting part to me was the importance of changing the words we use. Molest means to bother and what is being done is more than a little bother. Pedophile means child lover and love is not what's being shown. Interesting to think about.

[Fiona Ayerst]

I used this book as reference material for a book I am writing. It was interesting to read about abuse from the perspective of the abused person. However, I found there wasn't enough said about the character and after-effects, so it didn't suit my research. Fair enough, really, as it wasn't written for novelists- but rather as a guide to people who have been abused and are recovering.

[Tyshawn Knight]

This is a must read for all male victims of Child Sexual Abuse and women who were raped or molested by women. Same sex molestation and rape affects a person in a different manner that being raped by the opposite sex and this book compassionately and with understanding tackles those differences so you can stop feeling victimized.

[Jason Roske]

I urge anyone who was a victim to read this book.

[Kashif Nasir]

literally saved my life

[Benoit Lelièvre]

It's like firing up a torch after living in complete darkness for many years. A difficult read emotionally, but also very enlightening and educational.

[Daniel]

Lew presents a framework to understand the experience of male survivors of abuse as well as a path for recovery. Recommended for both those seeking recovery and those seeking to guide.

[Tom]

A very powerful book