Shyness: A Bold New Approach – Why It's Not a Character Flaw and What It Means to Be Shy

by Bernardo J. Carducci, Susan K. Golant

Shy Facts

Genres: Psychology, Self Help, Nonfiction

400 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1998

Reviews

[Su Myint Myat Moe · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’m a very shy person. I try to overcome this shyness in my whole life, but I still have to deal with this feeling and work on it every day. Shyness is different from introversion. Introverts have the conversation skills and they can communicate with certain people but they just simply prefer being by themselves. Shy people desire to be social. But their anxiety and negative self-critical evaluations hold them back. This book includes scientific studies on shyness, their nature and dynamic. Shyness is not a character flaw or mental disorder. You can’t take out of it. But you can control the shyness if you know it's dynamic. I recommend to this book to all shy people like me and people who have to manage and interact with shy people.

[Karina · Rating 4 out of 5]

A great book for shy people like me, and very useful. Parts of it are skimmable, because they aren't relevant to me (anymore/yet), but other parts could bear some re-reading to keep stuff fresh in your mind when you approach new people. I particularly liked the section on small talk. I know I don't ask questions, and apparently that's the thing to do -- and it really works!

I just tried it out the first day of university with a girl I'm sort of familiar with from a previous class, though we never talked for more than a minute before. Seeing that we just had a Christmas break, that was an obvious topic to start with ("How was your break?") and we talked about that. Then we moved on to other topics common to us, such as discussing this class, the teacher, the book ("Where did you get it?" because I was looking online for it and didn't find it). Success!

I think I need to buy a copy. It's not very expensive...

[Mark · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book provided me with several insights. First, I did not know that almost 50% of adults consider themselves to be shy. Second, it's important to understand that shyness is a personality trait, not a disease or condition that is innate. Dr. Carducci did a good job conveying the point that the choices we make can either reinforce our shy tendencies or allow us to breakthrough them. Overall, I'm glad I read this book and would recommend it to my friends.

[Tamahome · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kind of a survey on all the scientific studies on shyness. You'd definitely get plenty of detail, and maybe clear up some delusions, reading it. Goes all the way from 'reactive babies', to love and the workplace. But people who spend most of their leisure time reading would have no interest in this, right?

This Psychology Today article sort of has samples from the book: http://www.psychologytoday.com/articl...