When I finished this, I was crying tears of joy as well as wanting to cheer. And I can truly say I already feel significantly more confident to approach my marriage bed with joy, greater freedom, and a stronger love for my husband and deeper gratefulness for the fantastic gift from God of sexual intimacy within marriage.
A little background on me, the reviewer: This book is the latest I've read in an effort to better understand myself, my relationship with my husband, and to overcome any lingering issues from my past, so that I can be as fully loving a wife as possible, as well as to allow myself to be loved by my husband as fully as possible.
I heard about this book and after reading a few reviews, decided to buy it. After ordering it online (and getting one extra for a girlfriend), I found some more reviews, and to my surprise, read that there are sketches in it. I hadn't known that when I ordered it. But I decided that I wasn't going to judge it sight unseen. When it arrived, I figured I better get it over with and find out how "bad" the sketches were (in other words - were they just diagrams of anatomy, or...you know).
*flip, flip, flip* "Oh, my WORD!"
Blushing furiously, I closed the book and tossed it back in the box like a hot potato. I stood there in shock as my mind registered that I'd bought a book with drawings of couples in different sexual positions in it - and that I'd bought it for a Christian girlfriend as well! ("What will she think of me!?")
After taking a breather, I decided "You know, those sketches are in chapter TEN. If I read the NINE chapters that come before them, then maybe I'll feel differently. I'll take this one chapter at a time." And that's what I did. And with each chapter, I grew more at ease with the topic. Not in an "anything goes" way. But rather, what I read was helping me to get a right mindset about sex as God intends it - celebratory, bonding, free from fear or hang-ups and full of love. What I read made sense, was challenging, convicting, practical, comforting and, yes, exciting.
As to specific content I found helpful: Chapter 1's "Personal Report Card" was helpful in both identifying what areas and attitudes I need to work on, as well as giving my spirits a boost by reminding me of all that is going well with me (us). Part 2, "Confronting Ghosts From The Past", was good stuff about seeking complete healing for one's past sexual and self-worth wounds.
Chapter 7 deals with "Confronting the Body Image Bear". This is where the book really starting hitting home with me. Chapter 8 ("Experiencing the Big 'Oh!'") had helpful, down to earth explanations of what a woman's body is designed physically to do and capable of. Chapter 9, "Developing a Girl Scout Mentality", one of the most personally applicable and practical chapters, is about the importance of preparation for intimacy (sex) so as to allow for more spontaneity. (Ironic to be sure, but true) It lists common "Confidence Busters" and gives corresponding "Confidence Boosters" to help foster greater freedom to just enjoy ourselves as women, and let go of all the mental hang-ups we tend to bring to the marriage bed.
By the time I got to chapter 10, I was able to confidently (there's that word again *smile*) view them with no impure thoughts. Frankly, I thought they were tastefully drawn. The couples in the sketches (which are not "photo-real", btw) weren't the perfectly proportioned, airbrushed types you'd see in other books, but realistic women and men. That was actually comforting to me, and made them relatable to myself and my husband. So, ultimately, I feel this chapter educated me and empowered me as a wife.
(NOTE: This is a book written for wives, but for those women out there who are currently struggling with a porn addiction, I think they may need to skip this chapter or read elsewhere for help. I highly recommend "Sheet Music" by Dr. Kevin Leman. It is instructional on techniques, but has no sketches in it. As for husbands reading this chapter, I suggest if he does, that he read it with his wife *wink*. Now, moving on...)
Chapter 11, "Maintaining Healthy Boundaries", and Chapter 12, "Redefining Normal" deal with far more intense subject matter than chapter 10, in my opinion, and I read a lot of those chapters twice, so as to make sure I fully understood Ethridge's intent and meaning in her writing. I won't go into topic matter except to say that she addresses just about every sexual issue you could imagine happening within a marriage. Read slowly and carefully, so as not to misunderstand and think that she is "prescribing" something when she is really only "describing" something.
I think chapter 14, "Refueling That Loving Feeling", is full of really wise, sound advice. It so honestly and compassionately speaks to the couples that are having trouble with more than just the physical part of their relationship. If you are having trouble connecting with your husband mentally, emotionally or spiritually, and it's hindering you both in the bedroom, this is the chapter for you.
And if you and wondering "What in the world does GOD think of all this, this SEX TALK?!" - Chapter 15, "Overcoming the 'Church Lady' Syndrome" is just what you might need to feel free to enjoy the "lovely bits" (as I call them) that God gave you and your husband to mutually enjoy together.
Chapter 16 is one of my favorite chapters, and is full of humorous examples and simple, usable advice for how we parents can pass down a healthy, godly attitude about sexual matters down to our kids. I will definitely be using what I learned in this chapter.
Lastly, Chapter 17, "Whipped Cream and a Cherry" was a great cap-off for the book. It's full of many real-life examples of ways other couples have brought extra-special passion into their intimate relationship, and ends with an inspiring exhortation to get past our "hurdles" and to "keep pressing on" until we become a sexually confident wife, helping bring sexual fulfillment to our marriage that creates the "mental, emotional, physical and spiritual connection we all long to experience in this lifetime." Well said, Shannon!
I think this book would be very valuable for -most- wives, and I highly reccommend it.