Initially, I had been enjoying this story, despite someone telling Chris — a divorce lawyer — that he didn’t want to stay married in case his wife became ill and he was expected to look after her. I reasoned that this was an insignificant moment (so insignificant, it truly did not need to be included) and had no bearing on the story itself. Then, there was Gecko. He thought this:
“…a few years ago he'd watched a television show called The Undateables. And became addicted to it. There, on that show, were people like he imagined he was. Differently handsome; differently gifted; differently attractive.
Differently beautiful.”
Okay. This is a particularly personal one, as a disabled person. I have been told several times over the years — including by members of my family — that I should apply for The Undateables. Whilst I’m sure that many people have found value in that, I have also seen the internet memes, you know? I hate the idea that my experience of love is othered from convention. I hate the idea that because I’m disabled (and therefore only ever considered differently beautiful vs just beautiful), my dating pool is immediately limited. I already have enough of this floating around in my brain without it showing up in a detective novel for genuinely no reason. These ideas are further complicated by the fact that Gecko’s girlfriend is blind, because it raises the question of how he truly perceives her and their relationship.
Without spoiling anything, let’s also talk about the phrase “in a vegetative state”. I did a deep dive into research after this (I know) and found papers by disabled people from as early as 2003, calling for this to be changed. Of course, it leads very easily into quotes like: “…if she doesn't die, she might have so much brain damage she'd just be a—' She hesitated, unable to say the word.” We all know what word you were thinking of there, Peter.
One final example is Norman’s hesitation to properly start a relationship with someone because she was going through cancer treatment. Though I do feel like this particular section was handled well by Grace’s character, it could have so easily just not been included, especially since the book itself was already probably longer than it needed to be. The premise had so much promise and would have packed an altogether heavier emotional punch, if it hadn’t been sprinkled with ableism along the way.
PS: this book was published last year & fat jokes are not cool, either. I wish that I could rate this higher, because I genuinely like the author as a person and he was extra kind to my mum when she picked this up for me at a signing, but maybe another of his books will be a better fit in the future. I would like that.