Stable Conversation

by Murray Howe

This historic book may have numerous typos and missing text. Purchasers can download a free scanned copy of the original book (without typos) from the publisher. Not indexed. Not illustrated. 1900. ... ABOUT A FIRST OF APRIL JOKE. HOW A COMIC VALENTINE BROUGHT TROUBLE TO A HAPPY STABLE w HEN the Owner dropped in on Jimmy last Wednesday the latter sat on a feed box staring at a comic valentine with an expression on his face that meant trouble. "What's happened to you?" said the Owner. "Throw your lamps on that," said Jimmy, as he passed over the valentine. "I get that thing this morn. I can stand for a joke as well as any duck in the biz, but I draw the line at that picture, 'cause I know who sent it. There's only one guy in this district that's ornery enough to pass me a thing like that, an' that's that hammer-headed turk, Pat Murphy, that works for meal tickets on one of Baxter's hobbled pacers. I can shut both eyes an' see that guy's finish. It'll be him an' me to the sidewalk the first time he gets on my side of the street, an' when they pry me off of him they'll have to pick up what's left of that turk in a shovel." The Owner took the valentine--a wretched picture of a horse that looked as if he had been boiled in oil and run through a corn sheller--and read aloud the verse that went with "This is Jimmie's half-starved pacer, A chicken-hearted, would-be racer, Who begs his groomster every day To trade his muzzle for a bale of hay." "Well," said the Owner, as he finished. "that verse would undoubtedly justify the assassination of the man who wrote it, but you are not sure that Pat wrote it. If he merely bought the valentine, ready made, I would not kill him if I were you. I would send him a worse one' "A worse one--a worse one!" interrupted Jimmy, excitedly. "They can't be no worse ones. 'Half-starved racer--muzzle--' They wouldn't pass one through the mails if there was, an' it's more than likely the post office detectives was all drunk when thi...

26 pages, Paperback

First published August 9, 2015