Pure Pleasure: Why Do Christians Feel So Bad about Feeling Good?

by Gary L. Thomas

Gary Thomas, one of this generation's most trusted writers about the spiritual life, explores what it means to build a life of true pleasure - one that will liberate your spiritual life, marriage, family, community, and outreach. Many Christians assume "pleasure" and "sin" are synonymous. Others define godly pleasure so narrowly that they drastically minimize the powerful and holy role that pleasure can play in their lives. Still others feel guilty even thinking about how to build a life of pleasure. For all of them, Pure Pleasure provides an entirely new paradigm. It invites Christians to embrace a life of true pleasure as a pathway to obedience, worship, and service. Building on his bestselling books Sacred Pathways , Sacred Marriage , and the ECPA Gold Medallion-winning Authentic Faith , Gary Thomas takes readers to a new level of faith by providing a theological and inspirational framework to help them cultivate the kind of life that pleases God. Abounding with spiritual insights and practical exercises, this book invites you to shake off the shackles of misunderstanding about sin, provides the freedom to approach life in Christ with new wonder and joy, and challenges you to experience life as God meant it to overflowing with pleasure. Also Pure Pleasure small group video study and study guide, Spanish edition, and more.

Genres: Christian, Christian Living, Nonfiction, Faith, Spirituality, Christianity, Theology

256 pages, Paperback

First published October 2, 2009

About the author

Gary Thomas is a bestselling author and international speaker whose ministry brings people closer to Christ and closer to others. He unites the study of Scripture, church history, and the Christian classics to foster spiritual growth and deeper relationships within the Christian community.

Gary is the author of 20 books, including "Sacred Marriage" and "Cherish", that together have sold over two million copies, have been translated into more than a dozen languages, and won numerous awards . His writings have established him as a thought-leader in the areas of marriage, parenting, and spiritual formation.

Gary holds a B.A. in English Literature from Western Washington University, an MA degree in systematic theology from Regent College (Vancouver, BC), and an honorary Doctor of Divinity degree from Western Seminary (Portland, OR).

He serves on the teaching team (and as Writer in Residence) at Second Baptist Church, Houston—a congregation with six campuses and 70,000 members—and is an adjunct faculty member at Western Seminary in Portland, Oregon and Houston Theological Seminary in Houston Texas.

Gary’s speaking ministry has led him to speak in 49 states and nine different countries, and on numerous national television and radio programs, including multiple appearances on Focus on the Family and Family Life Today. Gary’s interviews on Focus on the Family have been chosen among the “Best of 2013,” “Best of 2014” and “Best of 2017.” Gary is a lifelong advocate of using the Christian classics to bring people closer to Christ.

Gary enjoys running in his spare time and has completed 14 marathons, including the Boston Marathon three times. He and his wife Lisa have been married for 35 years and they have three adult children and the smartest, cutest, most adorable granddaughter on the planet.

Gary Thomas – Bringing people closer to Christ and closer to others.

Reviews

[Margaret]

Awesome book right to the end. So many good points, read it.

[Lauren Edwards]

I'm impressed. Thomas approaches this topic with a refreshing, simple humility. It is written in a very accessible way-- very easy to read and full of practical advice. I personally prefer a more in-depth philosophical approach, but I think this style of writing is probably better. The book's message is one that a wide range of people in the church need to hear. The most impactful part of this book for me was the first three chapters. I wish I had grown up with this understanding of the role of holy pleasure in a believer's spiritual growth and even worship. Such a beautiful and relevant message <3

[Ashlyn]

This book has contributed to my life in more ways that I can explain! Being the eldest child, it is easy for me to slip into “rule following” tendencies because it’s what I’m supposed to do and model for others. But I have learned that God’s heart is for us to enjoy the earth that he created for us, within his healthy bounds.

This book was helpful in breaking me out of that mindset to consider how I can walk freely day by day, especially on the tail end of a particularly stressful season of work/personal life. It also showed me that I have permission to say yes to things because of the God-honoring joy it will bring!

I am thankful for the discussion questions at the end of each chapter. I did not feel all were relevant to me, but there was always at least one that was helpful for me to process through. This would be a good book to go through with a group! Definitely recommend this one.

[Jonathan Patton]

This was good, but some of the arguments were not very robust. I feel like John Piper probably has materials which deal with this issue more comprehensively in the context of Christian hedonism.

[Rebekah S]

Pleasure is one of those areas for Christians with a rut on each side of the road, and we tend to spring from one to the other more often than we tread the center. Either you struggle with making pleasure your god, or you see pleasure as something that only ever competes with God.

I think this book would be helpful for someone in either rut, but especially those in the latter. And I am certainly one of those in the latter.

I picked up this book because I'm currently on a quest to understand how delight factors into God's love. I can more easily grasp God's love (and therefore our call to imitate Him) involving sacrifice—the "deny yourself, pick up your cross, and follow me," side of things (Mk. 8:34). But what about the side that says "at your right hand are pleasures forevermore" (Ps. 16:11)? Sacrifice without delight is drudgery. Sacrifice with delight is divine.

Of course, if you follow Jesus long enough, you do experience that confounding joy that comes from walking a painful path or sacrificing for someone in imitation of Christ. But if, like me, you have also earnestly attempted to discern God's will by asking "Which option will hurt the most?" assuming that must be the most righteous choice, or you find yourself feeling guilty for any minute or dollar not devoted to utility, this book has some helpful tethers.

Thomas helps put good gifts in their proper place—not as things that compete with God, but as things which are intended to inflame our love for Him as they reveal His love for us. He gives reminders that help us reclaim pleasures that we might otherwise take for granted. And he argues that, in learning to seek out Godly pleasures in the right ways, we inoculate ourselves against the siren songs of pleasures twisted by sin. After all, why would we stoop to perversions of delight when we're already satisfied by the better version?

Structurally, this book didn't feel as organized as Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy? or Every Body Matters: Strengthening Your Body to Strengthen Your Soul, but in typical Gary Thomas fashion, it was very accessible and did a good job avoiding specific prescription in a way that would limit the truth behind it. Overall it was still a very worthwhile, thought-provoking read.

[Olya]

Simply written and very relatable. Learn to enjoy the pleasure God gives you. Would recommend this book, especially those who take life too seriously and frown upon laughter and joy.

[Amydeanne]

Can we as Christians have pleasure?

I think some of us get so caught up with all the bad stuff that we think God doesn’t want us to enjoy life. It is really far from the truth isn’t it? I mean we don’t have to be stifled in our pleasures to love the Lord more do we? Pure Pleasure by Gary Thomas talks exactly about that. He presents issues about God that we struggle with. How to have a healthy pleasure, and what they are.

I was delightfully surprised when I started reading this. Gary has his feet firmly planted in the Lord’s Word, and I loved his attitude about it. He challenged me to check off my internal pleasure list and how off or on track I was. It also reminded me of some of the reasons why I am attracted to my husband, and other people who have authentic Christian lives. I mean do you ever notice those who really are different — that special glimmer in their eyes? I know with my husband he has such a pleasure and sheer joy in the Lord Jesus that I can’t help but be attracted to him.

I think Gary basically sums it up nicely on page 25 when he says “Satan will trap some with compulsions toward illicit pleasures. These traps are well known and preached against every week. But other believers tend toward prideful, work-oriented compulsions in which any rest or any enjoyment is seen as weakness or “giving in.” Since God didn’t make us to live in sin or without pleasure, either way of life will eventually destroy us.”

He further goes on to ask how can we honor our Lord if we deny everything he created that he called good? It got me thinking how many times I ignore what God said was good. On the other side, it sure made me reconsider my reasoning behind “little sins” of over indulgent and how it affects my joy. (He got me on the potato chips! lol and if you’re wondering what I’m jabbering about you’ll have to get the book!)

I would gladly suggest this book to friends who are feeling guilty about feeling good (in the Lord) and really think Gary makes some great points in his book! He’ll be on my quoteable list for sure!

** review copy provided

[Elaina Swanson]

I believe very honestly that this book is so important for MOTHERS to read. I am not a mother, but I have one. I’m also a Nanny so I work with a lot of moms, but really it seems to be a generational thing. Women my mothers age seemed to give up their sense of self somewhere, and forgot how to have fun or to delight themselves. They find pleasure and purpose in mothering, but then when they’re older and their children are grown they have no hobbies and no sense of adventure. If you feel, even as I do sometimes, that you must be miserable to be “good” please give this a read.

Thomas also hit me right in the heart when he wrote about the fear of being good at and loving something only to always live in fear that God will take it away to teach you some sort of lesson or something, and that that is not in His character. This book gave me great comfort about the loving nature of God, but it is also full of conviction about trading this line carefully and with purpose

[Garland Vance]

Gary Thomas tackles the questions that surround the role of pleasure in a Christian's life. Should Christians spend money and time and energy on the things that they enjoy. More personally, should I spend time and money on good coffee and racquetball and novels?

I appreciate that this book is nuanced. Thomas doesn't offer simple answers, but he pushes Christians to learn how to delight in God through his gifts without making those gifts into idols.

I found this book to be engaging and incredible. Thomas takes profound and complex insights and makes them easily accessible.

I HIGHLY recommend this book for both those who think they should avoid all pleasure and those who think they should indulge every pleasure. God has created us to delight in him, and his gifts (like a great cup of coffee) give us an ability to do this!

[Karina Owens]

Wow. I didn’t know how much I needed this until I started listening. I’ll let the quotes do the talking:

“It’s spiritual vandalism to turn one of God’s gifts into a test of piety.”

“We should not fear pleasure but we should fear alienation from God” [result from either a deprivation of pleasure that God wants us to experience or from pleasure that doesn’t point us back to him].

“Building a life of true, lasting pleasure fortifies our lives against evil; we become satisfied with the good so we aren’t as thirsty to give in to temptation.” Focus on good v bad!!!

“Are you addicted to pleasing people because you’ve let your life become too small?”

“Without soul rest, fear and guilt inevitably follow pleasure”

[Justin Ruszkiewicz]

Gary Thomas has become one of my favorite authors! I want to say this is my eighth or ninth book I’ve read by him, and while this isn’t one of my favorites, it’s still a very strong book with a lot to offer. The whole point he makes is to challenge the idea that Christians can’t pursue pleasure or even have pleasure. That somehow pleasure goes against God’s will. But truly, pleasure is most definitely within God’s will for us, so long as our ultimate pleasure is found in Him. He uses other things, people, relationships, foods, and anything that’s not inherently sinful to be agents of pleasure. I think the only knock I have on the book is it can be a little repetitive especially in the middle of the book, but it’s an eye-opening book and a very important read if you’re trying to grow in Christ, and especially for those who may have grown up believing pleasure is sinful.

Rating: 8.5/10, four stars.

[Joy]

an answer to asceticism - why pleasure is a good God-given gift, helpful for guarding against sin, nurturing contentment and gratitude towards God, and refilling our spiritual tanks for ministry and relationships. also practical tips on how to cultivate pleasure in healthy ways!

the premise of the book feels a little extreme but it was helpful for me nonetheless as someone who can be overly pragmatic and loath to indulge sometimes.

the author writes in a personable tone, which is aged with wisdom and his own experience of finding satisfaction in God in the midst of his other hobbies and interests. very readable and enjoyable!

[Shantelle]

A thought-provoking read! Though not without error, I'm sure, Pure Pleasure is a helpful Christian nonfiction book for anyone who has ever felt guilty for feeling good or desiring wholesome beauty and pleasures.

I think the last sentence sums up Gary Thomas's heart on this matter:
"Thank [God] for these pleasures, and let your satisfied soul draw others to the Christ you've learned to enjoy above all else."

[Drew]

Like other Gary Thomas stuff, this one is a mixed bag of "good" and "hmm". The authors he cites are always a list of folks I trust and folks I'm really unsure about, and his books reflect that. Lots to applaud, and lots to carefully consider.

I probably would have been served better by reading Joe Rigney's Things of Earth again, though I have qualms with that one too.

[Wassenario]

Loved this book and hit me in a good time of life. There were a lot of intriguing thoughts about how pleasure points us to God and enhances our enjoyment of him. Yet it also gave the appropriate warnings of not finding our meaning in life in pleasures or letting pleasures pull us away from God. Great read!

[Marty Bedwell]

The kind of book I’d like to read yearly. To remember the importance of smiling and laughter. To remember that God is so much more than just sitting down with a Bible and a journal to take notes in.
That He’s a living, breathing King that we delight in. “All good things are from Heaven above”

[Marella Mylet]

Every Christian needs to read. I shrieked with joy through the whole thing!

[Alicia Snyder]

Good reminder that God gives us simple and exquisite pleasures to renew us along the way.

[Nicole Morton]

This book gave me so much to think about. I love his attitude of abundance and seeking things that give us real and lasting joy. Highly recommend!

[Lucas]

Very good book on a rarely discussed topic.

[Jared McLeod]

This book was exceptional. Pleasure is not something one should feel bad about experiencing, but one should enjoy with the knowledge that it is God given.

[Jennie]

Lots of good thoughts in this book. Docked a star only because it occasionally felt a little repetitive. I’d still recommend it though.

[Laura]

I underlined and tabbed so many passages in this book.

[Jeff Schmitt]

Thought provoking and eye-opening. Reminding me that it's okay to be okay. I don't have to find the dark cloud behind every silver lining. And no matter what dark time I go through, or what I've lost, I am never, EVER, more than a silent prayer away from God

[Danielle]

I truly enjoyed this book because it makes you think about and even question your imposed standards and convictions. The author definitely doesn't tell you what he thinks you should be doing or not doing. He brings to light what the Bible does say about personal holiness and about Jesus' personal testimony on earth.

I appreciated this book maybe even more than the "average joe" because of my personal family and church background. The author explains why certain thinking is prevalent in certain denominations.

I put this in my "to read again" booklist here on Goodreads because I thought the ideas and information was poignant and relevant (to my life specifically) enough to be reminded of again. I would say that everyone should read this to either understand someone you know to whom this is applicable or to understand yourself or your background.

It was written in an easy manner and simple to understand.

[Molly Henderson]

A very good, well-reasoned, insightful work by an excellent author. Worth a read.

[John]

I think a Christian must have first said the words "guilty pleasure"--- because sometimes we seem to be incapable of separating the two. Our understanding of the importance of fleeing sin, dying to ourselves, & focusing on God has often confused us of the place of pleasure in the life of a follower of Christ.

We seem to swing between the two extremes of rejecting any "earthly" thing that feels good or else embracing anything and everything under the justification that God loves us and wants us to be happy.

It seems that legitimate pleasure is a ground so tricky and full of land mines that few pastors or teachers will walk deeply into its territory. At most they seem to skim around it with some humorous quotes or iron clad rules.

Gary Thomas, however, does neither, plunging into the heart of the place of pleasure in the life of a Christian with a deep, thoughtful book filled with wisdom.

Well known as a thinker and writer who draws upon centuries of ancient and classic theology and philosophy throughout his books, Gary does the same here, carefully considering the topic from a variety of angles, from the place of pleasure in God's creation and plan, its dangers and delights, how it fits into our love & devotion to God, and how it truly can be purely enjoyed in a holy life. He speaks to Christians who have tipped too far in both directions: to those who reject pleasure, he calls them to enjoy what God has given for them to enjoy as a way of strengthening their souls and their love for God. To those who have put pleasure above all else in their life, he calls them back to remember the Giver more than the gifts, and shows them a better way.

As with all of Thomas' books, it is chock full of quotable insights. Here are a just a few of my favorites:


Nonbelievers are supernaturally thirsty because they do not know God, whom they were created to enjoy. Many believers are thirsty because they do not know how to enjoy God and the life He has given them.

It would be the height of folly, the triumph of arrogance, for me to assume I can do without what God has laid at my feet and blessed as good gifts from his gracious hand.

I walk with Christ because a life with Christ is a beautiful life, the most incredible journey I can imagine.

To the child of God, pleasure becomes the destination we reach when we walk the path of obedience.

All we can do is walk the road God lays out for us.


If you've ever wondered or ever struggled with the right way to feel pleasure in your life, you will love reading this book. (Just don't feel guilty about enjoying it!)

[Debbie]

If you feel guilty about enjoying the blessings God has given you, doing something nice for yourself, or taking a day off when there's so much need out there, then this is the book for you. But it's also for those who realize they're being tempted by pleasures that are condemned in the Bible. It shows how appropriate pleasure done in the God-ordained context will help prevent a Christian from being tempted by inappropriate behavior.

Chapter one gave the premise of the book. Chapters two through five explained exactly what he meant when he said Christians should enjoy themselves and why he thought God wanted us to enjoy life. Chapters six through fourteen dug deeper into how appropriate enjoyment of pleasure would play out in a Christian's life, and he included examples from his life.

The book was Bible-based, and he quoted Scripture to support his main points. I agreed with the points he made. However, especially in the first chapters, his tone came across as defensive--as if he assumed all of his readers would attack his premise and he wanted to reassure and calm them down before moving on. So some parts were repetitious, like he wanted to make really, really sure we didn't misunderstand what he was saying. I think I would have been more deeply engaged by chapters two through five if he'd presented his case more succinctly.

In any case, the rest of the book was excellent. The entire book was easy to understand and made good points. I'd recommend it to anyone who "feels bad about feeling good" or otherwise wonders if they really have a Biblical view of pleasure.


I received this review copy from the publisher.

[Terri]

"We consider 'pleasure' a synonym for 'sin.' If it feels good, we think, it must be the devil's handmaiden." Christians can have the false dilemma of seeking pleasure OR doing what's right. Gary Thomas sets the record straight and carefully lays out the premise that seeking pleasure IS doing right.

Christians need to get their minds right and begin to believe that the community of God is a party.

Rather than living 'not to sin,' Christians need to begin living for pleasure. It doesn't even sound right to say such a thing does it?

Gary Thomas lays out the case for leaving off obsessing over our sin and beginning to delight in the pleasures that God has given us to enjoy. "Let us learn to fill our souls with beauty, art, noble achievement, fine meals, rich relationships, and soul-cleansing laughter. And... let us be wary of a faith that denies these blessings as 'worldly' and unfit, as though Satan rather than God designed them."

In this age of constantly seeking the pleasures of the world, it is easy to look at pleasure as worldly and evil and that the anecdote is a sober, dull life. Thomas thankfully reassures the serious Christian that God absolutely delights in our seeking pleasure and in fact God invented pleasure. Of course, seeking pleasure must begin with a heart filled by the Holy Spirit.

Thomas makes straight the path to pleasure and dares you to live with feasting and joy.

The one detraction is the somewhat pedantic writing which is probably a result of trying to make a concise message long enough to be a book.

[Pastoralmusings]

Pure Pleasure by Gary Thomas
I've known that Gary Thomas was out there writing books, but this is the first book of his that I have read. That being said, I enjoyed Pure Pleasure.
Thomas has a way of writing that is easy on the reader. His writing is simple and down-to-earth. I like that. He is also a transparent writer. We are not left wondering what he thinks, nor whether he struggles as we do: he speaks openly and honestly on these subjects.
Thomas deals with the question that has plagued many Christians for centuries- the issue of pleasure. Many have declared pleasure to be sinful. Others have become antinomians and declared that nothing is off limits. Thomas declares both ideas to be wrong and unbiblical. In fact, in the same vein of thought as Desiring God, Thomas declares pleasure to be good, and to be our duty.
We do NOT have to feel guilty because we enjoy something. Why, then, do many Christians feel bad when they feel good? Simply because we have misunderstood our Bibles and what they say about pleasure.
Not only does Thomas show us that things we naturally enjoy (sex, food, family,etc) can be enjoyed in a way that pleases God, he also shows us how that misplaced pleasure is dangerous. What is just as necessary to us is his chapter on finding pleasure even when things are difficult.
All in all, Pure Pleasure is a message that we need to hear today.