Too Many Men

by Lily Brett

Ruth Rothwax, a successful woman with her own business, Rothwax Correspondence, can find order and meaning in writing words for other people--condolence letters, thank-you letters, even you-were-great-in-bed letters. But as the daughter of Edek Rothwax, an Auschwitz survivor with a somewhat idiosyncratic approach to the English language, Ruth can find no words to understand the loss of her family experienced during World War II.

Ruth is obsessed with the idea of returning to Poland with her father, but she doesn't quite understand why she feels this so intensely. To make sense of her family's past, yes. To visit the places where her beloved mother and father lived and almost died, certainly. But she knows there's more to this trip. By facing Poland, and the past, she can finally confront her own future.

Genres: Historical Fiction, Fiction, Australia, Holocaust, Jewish, Poland, Novels

542 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1999

Reviews

[Martina Weiss · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dieses Buch habe ich endlich, nach ca. 15 Jahren, aus meinem Regal befreit. Damals wollte ich es unbedingt haben, daran erinnere ich mich noch, warum war mir allerdings entfallen. Eine jüdische Autorin aus New York… vom Titel her vielleicht was Feministisches? 🤷🏻‍♀️ Egal, es ist 5 cm dick und ich brauche Platz im Regal, also „auf geht‘s“!
Und nun war ich drei Tage lang im Polen der Jahrtausendwende, zusammen mit Ruth und ihrem einundachtzigjährigem Vater, der das Todeslager Birkenau überlebt hat und nach dem Krieg zusammen mit seiner Frau nach Australien ging, wo Ruth zehn Jahre später das Licht der Welt erblickte. Heute ist sie eine erfolgreiche New Yorker Geschäftsfrau und muss sich finanziell keine Sorgen machen. Aber andere Dinge treiben sie um, Fragmente von Erzählungen ihrer Eltern über das Grauen, das sie erlebt haben, noch mehr aber die nicht erzählten Dinge. Es zieht sie nach Polen, den Geburtsort ihrer Eltern, sie will Antworten. Ihre Mutter verstarb mit sechzig Jahren, sie kann sie nicht mehr fragen. Verwandte gibt es keine, niemand sonst hat überlebt. Sie schafft es, ihren Vater zu überreden sie zu begleiten. Diese Reise ist schmerzhaft und aufwühlend, aber auch wutmachend und manchmal ein wenig skurril.
Die Ähnlichkeiten in der Biografie von Ruth zur Biografie von Autorin Lily Brett sind sicher kein Zufall, und auf jeder der 655 Seiten spürt man die Authentizität der inneren Monologe, der Dialoge mit dem Vater, der Trauer, der Wut aber auch des Humors.
Lily Brett schafft einen Mix von Gefühlen im Leser zu verursachen, der einen mitreißt, man spürt mit den Protagonisten, man lacht und schämt sich und trauert mit ihnen.
Wenn man die Kunst des Erzählens in zehn Ebenen einteilen würde, hätte dieses Buch auf allen Ebenen eine Plus Eins verdient und hätte ich auch nur ansatzweise etwas zu sagen, dann wäre dieses Buch Pflichtlektüre an allen Schulen. Besser und zeitgemäßer kann man Geschichte und ihre gesamte emotionale Auswirkung nicht vermitteln… unterhaltsamer wohl auch nicht.
Danke Frau Brett… und Entschuldigung, dass ich es jetzt erst gelesen habe.
Danke Melanie Walz für die tolle Übersetzung!

[Molshri · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is definitely not for everyone. It's a deeply emotional journey to Poland by a Holocaust survivor and his daughter. A heartbreaking tale of a woman's search for her roots.
The Holocaust was a mass extermination of Jews carried out in a coldly methodical manner. The cruelty and torture was unbelievable and it is hard for us to comprehend the psychological state of the survivors who lost their whole families in the gas chambers.
This is a must read to understand how the survivors of the concentration camps and their children coped with the traumatic memories of the War.
Too Many Men also has an interesting motley of funny and quirky characters which add lightness to a sorrowful tale..
Do read..

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is one of my all time favourite books. The first line still makes me laugh, and that's the beauty of this book. It explores a traumatic subject with humour and beautifully-written characters. I fell a bit in love with Edek. It's one of those books I recommend to others over and over.

[Sereyna · Rating 2 out of 5]

**Halfway through**
Feel very perturbed so far by this book. I can't decide if it's only mildly annoying me, or I really hate it.


**Now finished**
Look, it didn't really get any better. The 'suprise' at the end was obvious from about half way through. Ruth is not well written if the idea was to create sympathy and empathy. She was awful and I didn't like her at all by the last few pages. There is certainly a large number of facts in this book, but they were drowned by too much description (how many times do we have to read that Ruth was bilious? Honestly?)
If this was a vehicle to launch a vitriolic attack on Poland and Polish people, mission accomplished. If it was supposed to be an emotional humanisation of the deep suffering of a Holocaust survivor and his daughter, sorry - epic fail.

[Jacquie South · Rating 1 out of 5]

Don't understand the rave reviews for this book. I found it overall quite tedious, the main character fairly unlikable, and the writing stilted and repetitve. There were some interesting facts in the book, but they were presented in a very workman-like way. Dialogue was dry and generally boring, and overall, very little actually happened.

Can't say I'd recommend it.

[Alexandra Phillips · Rating 3 out of 5]

Did not love it at the start, especially disliked the Hoss ghost talking, the fantasy aspect clashed very hard. Ruth was also quite an unlikeable character. But her father was excellent and the writing was good. The ending was also great which made up for it.

[Lizp · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was a wonderful read. It’s poignant, devastating ( based on the holocaust) yet funny in parts. I love the way Lily Brett writes.

I loved Edek. He’s even wackier in the sequel You Gotta Have Balls. I believe he’s based on Brett’s own Dad. The main character, Ruth who runs a letter writing business in New York, is also excellent.

She is very keen to go to Poland with Edek, as she wants to make sense of the past, the extermination of her family. The description of their time in Poland is heartbreaking, yet sometimes funny.

The Zofia and Walentyna characters are very well drawn. Edek says to them at one point: “my daughter does leave her husbands.” Ruth, just about to laugh has an image of herself perpetually leaving a series of husbands. She then becomes sad as she thinks of Norman, her first love.

Zofia is after Edek. Ruth is not happy. She thinks Zofia, at 63, is too young for her Dad. Zofia ( a great woman for poetic license) says she has said no to men of thirty. Ruth was impressed. No men of thirty were running after her!

I was taken aback to read one reviewer on here describing the book as trashy chick lit! As it’s anything but, I’m assuming she failed to understand the book and its premise. I enjoyed the ending, albeit it being abrupt.

This was the first of Brett’s books I discovered while on holiday in Rottnest many years ago, when I ran out of books and found the General Store had a great book selection. After reading it, I went off and bought everything she’d written. She’s a powerful writer.

[Judith · Rating 4 out of 5]

A deeply emotional journey of a father-daughter duo that explore their families past in Poland.
It was a tough read, not going to lie. The portrait of Poland and their inhabitants in the 1990s is rough - even though understandable. Can't wait to see what the movie will be like.

[EsteBanana Kabana · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ooooh this took me a very long time to finish but I was happy I persevered. Beautifully written with a great ending. The story gave me a much better appreciation and understanding of the atrocities of the holocaust.

[Nancy · Rating 1 out of 5]

DNF
Redeeming value here ?
Very random :(
Couldn’t get very far in this one.

[Stephen Wilson · Rating 3 out of 5]

Way too much repetition of particular scenes. The central characters don’t really grow with the narrative, which at times is weighed down by so much detail of events of little import to the purpose of the story.

[Paul · Rating 5 out of 5]

So, I saw the movie based on this book - the movie (and the reprint of this book) is called "Treasure". The book was so much more complicated and layered than the movie. Really fascinating read, about going back to Poland after the fall of the Soviet Union.

[Nize · Rating 5 out of 5]

Der Roman nimmt einen mit auf eine intensive emotionale Reise. Es ist teils tieftraurig, verstörend und entsetzlich. Aber auch Momente von Sehnsucht, Zärtlichkeit und Witz finden immer wieder Platz.
Man begleitet die 43-jährige Jüdin Ruth und ihren 81-jährigen Vater Edek auf einer Reise durch Polen um die Jahrtausendwende. Edek, sowie Ruth Mutter, waren beide in Auschwitz/Birkenau interniert, haben ihre gesamte Familie durch den Holocaust verloren und Unbeschreibliches durchleben müssen.
Ruth, die erst einige Jahre nach nach dem Ende des Nationalsozialismus geboren wurde, ist dennoch tiefgeprägt durch Shoa. Sie leidet an unterschiedlichen Zwängen, Unruhezustände, Essstörung und einer unstillbaren Sehnsucht nach den verlorenen Verwandten.
Diese Sehnsucht und der Versuch Zugang zu den Erfahrungen ihrer Eltern während der Internierung, über die diese nur wenig gesprochen haben, scheint ihre Motivation zu sein mit ihrem Vater gemeinsam nach Polen zu reisen.
In der Erzählung ist man mit expliziten Darstellungen der Gewalt gegen Jüd_innen im Ghetto und den Vernichtungslagern konfrontiert, die teils völlig unvermittelt geschildert werden. Man bekommt tiefe Einblicke in die Lebensrealität und Herausforderungen von Kindern von Holocaustüberlebenden und die Dimension intergenerational weitergegebener Traumata.
Besonders bedrückend für mich war auch die Auseinandersetzung mit der polnischen Gedenkpolitik, bzw. dem fehlen dieser und dem massiven Antisemitismus in Polen.
Das Buch ist für mich eine absolute Leseempfehlung, wenn nicht gar Pflichtlektüre! Es ist so berührend und verstörend, es fesselt einen regelrecht. Gleichzeitig habe ich so viel gelernt und reflektiert. Ich glaube diese Lektüre wird mich noch lange begleiten.

[Ania Red · Rating 1 out of 5]

1.5 and that’s being generous because edek (the dad) existed and was an actual highlight - he reminds me of all polish dads/grandpas (lolol). he was a warm/comic relief that was 1000% needed to break away from ruth… our narrator, ruth (the daughter), is so unlikable 🙃 she seems to hate poland and every single polish person she meets/sees - the hatred is so angry - it’s one thing to direct these feelings at the bad actors or the perpetrators (i.e. the old couple that stole edek’s family’s apartments and all the items inside, and then extorted ruth for more and more money when she tries to buy it back) but to blanket this sense of hate to cover all of poland and it’s people, was saddening to read ☹️ (especially since it seemed like she hated polish people much more than the germans)… it all took away from what could have been such an amazing and impactful story of a father (survivor of the holocaust) and daughter (witnessing firsthand with her father a return to poland) and getting them a little closer to a understanding of how it all impacted everything in their lives. i feel like a true exploration of that story was left to the wayside and instead we get segments of her chatting with rudolf höss’ ghost ??? random other bits and bobs of ruth hating people and running but not eating anything and mentioning her very successful business in new york. and then the ending that just ended ??? (tho edek and zofia’s blossoming love makes me happy)… overall, it was a lil disappointing, but … i’m still going to watch the movie, if only to see edek as i imagined

[Rebecca · Rating 2 out of 5]

I actually really liked this book. The only reason I rated it just "OK" is because it ends so abruptly, in the middle of a sentence, and not like a freeze-frame ending. More like "my copy of this book must be missing the last several pages." But it wasn't, because I checked, and the other books at the bookstore were the same. Why did the author do this? This book deals with the impact of the holocaust in Europe during WWII, not just on survivors but on the survivors' children. Was the abrupt ending an attempt to put the reader in the same position as victims of the holocaust, who had their lives cut off so unnecessarily and suddenly? That's the only explanation I can think of. They never got to find out what would have happened either. It's so sad. But I still want to know what happens, because I really liked the main character. I have been hoping there would be a sequel, but it's been years and there has been nothing.

I read this in hardcover. It was a Christmas gift back in the days before iPods and e-readers. I still have the book on a shelf, and every time I see it, it bugs me. What the heck was the author thinking?

[Courtney · Rating 2 out of 5]

'Too Many Men' was an interesting read, not on of my favorites. I was very disappointed with the storyline - it held quite a bit of promise, but fell flat. The plot follows Ruth and her father Edek traveling returning to Poland for the first time since the war. There is a lot of emotion portrayed by both Ruth and her Father. Ruth, wanting to know more about her family, Edek not so sure of the trip.

The narrative of Höss was strange. I kept expecting more to come from it. I felt it again, fell short and was rather pointless. I found the narrative as annoying as Ruth.

The chapters were way too long, with inconvenient breaks. I am happy I read the novel, but I would not recommend it. Character development was flat, storyline was boring, and there were way too many side stories. The 'too many men' quote from the beginning of the novel didn't pan out. I felt it was left unanswered.

Happy to be moving on to my next book.

[Khrystene · Rating 5 out of 5]

You'll either love it or hate it. Personally, I loved it and love all Lily Brett's books, as 'difficult' and frustrating as the characters can be, I love them dearly. Just like my own family! :)

Maybe it's because I've lived in Lodz and my family come from Lodz, or maybe it's because I'm Polish and have a mixed up crazy story for a family history myself.

Who knows. I just like it a a lot.

[Judy · Rating 5 out of 5]

i found this book "unputdownable" - it haunted me. i cried andi found myself haunted by the space this woman was in

considering this was autobiagraphical it was too chilling for words - however, i loved it

[Jennifer Paton Smith · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was another book club choice. I really liked it. Good choice!

What it’s about: Too Many Men is the story of Ruth, a 40-something Australian Jewish woman living in New York who meets her 81-year-old survivor father, Edek, in Poland for a visit.

What I liked: There are so many things I like about this book.

I liked both the main characters: I identified with Ruth as an independent woman, a runner, a writer, and most important, someone who thinks critically about her surroundings and tries to get others to do the same — she’s on a mission. She keeps correcting those who refer to Auschwitz as a museum rather than as a death camp. And when she sees tours of the factory where Steven Spielberg filmed “Schindler’s List”, she is compelled to point out to everyone she meets that it’s not just a movie set, it’s the setting for a true story. I liked Edek — an energetic man who makes friends everywhere, and seems surprisingly at ease in Poland, in contrast to Ruth, who seems more traumatized, even though he is the Holocaust survivor. This book gets across the idea that the second generation suffered too, in its own way.
There is a scene where the family tries to reclaim some of their own possessions. It’s very powerful — the highlight of the book.
There is so much information about Jewish life in Poland, historical events, the Holocaust, Polish attacks against Jews after the Holocaust. It is provided organically, through conversations between characters, including the long-dead historical figure who is a character in the book. This figure provides a Nazi perspective on that period, which is interesting. The information about the Holocaust doesn’t seem stilted — because it comes from characters with different perspectives and is part of the story. I don’t feel that the author is preaching to me, although I realize that her mission is probably to educate her readers about the Holocaust through her fiction.
This is an intelligent book, with comments that resonate, such as our obsequious behaviour to the wealthy in our community, and the reasons for it, and the discussion of latent Polish anti-Semitism. This really resonated with me — I have had Polish colleagues at several workplaces, including the present one, and some of them provide the same reason as the one in the book as to why Poland is not anti-Semitic — the huge Jewish population that existed there for centuries.
I never find this argument particularly compelling. This is as uncomfortable to me as it is to Ruth in the book. And she rattles off all the reasons why. I really identified with some of her feelings, although at a few points she goes overboard and seems to be really anti-Polish without giving individuals a chance. I don’t act that way and I don’t condone her behaviour.
For me personally, I feel that Eastern European anti-Semitism actually played a positive role in my family’s history: My great-grandfather returned to Poland in 1905, after 3 years in Canada, because it wasn’t religious enough. The pogroms of 1905 (mainly in Russia, Ukraine, and Bessarabia) convinced him that Canada was a better choice after all.
This book is turning me off my idea of going to Poland. I have been considering going on one of those tours, or a March of the Living at some point in the next few years. The detailed description of Poland, the cities and the people, the idea of Jewish tourism benefitting Polish anti-Semites, the number of Poles who have not come to terms with their country’s anti-Semitic history and role in the Holocaust, the continuing anti-Semitism in the country although it is now largely Judenrein, and even the unflattering wooden statues of Jews for sale in tourist areas — I have heard of all of these and I am turned off.
At the book club meeting about this book, we had a great discussion. Another woman, child of survivors, really liked this book as well. Another member had been to Poland and some of the places that Ruth and Edek visit in the novel. She validated many of the descriptions from the book, although her reactions were different.

What I didn’t like
There are few things I don’t like:

* When Ruth meets Martina, we seem to be hit over the head with the suggestion that her ex-husband Gerhard has a connection to Ruth. This is a bit of overkill.
* The title isn’t really meaningful. Ruth doesn’t have too many men: she’s single and doesn’t have any, except for her father.
* The end of the story is disappointing, and is like an infomercial for the sequel.
* I don’t like the historical character Hoss. He is disturbing and doesn’t really fit. I liked that he added factual information about Nazis during the Holocaust. However, I was really not interested in his adventures in the afterlife, and I found his connection to Ruth disturbing and unnecessary. It detracted from the flow of the main story.
Should you read it?
This is likely not the best literature ever — some people in the book club found much of the writing choppy. That didn’t bother me. It fit with the main character.

The story was terrific, and the characters were compelling.

I recommend this book to those interested in reading about the Holocaust and modern-day Poland and the Jews.

[Donna]

Book club book, should have been called too many pages...

[Caren · Rating 5 out of 5]

I hadn't read Brett's novel since it was first published in 1999 and found myself much more affected by its powerful narrative 20 years later. Perhaps it is because of my closer connection to Holocaust study and to the survivors with whom I volunteer at JHC. Brett's personal experience as the child of Holocaust survivors equipped her with the perceptive observations of her parents' trauma and the psychological and behavioural impact of their past terror on the 2nd generation. This mesmerising novel, like much of her fiction, is based on that dynamic.

Brett's character, Ruth Rothwax, travels to Poland with her elderly father, Edek, and shares with him an emotionally confronting journey through the country that is now "absent of Jews". Brett confronts the tourist attractions that have supposedly paid tribute to the murdered Jews, though she is disgusted by the fake Yiddishkeit on display, particularly the carved wooden statues of bearded, long-nosed Jews that are so proudly sold to the tourists who are blind to the dishonour these "trinkets" project. Most emphatically, Ruth refuses to acknowledge Auschwitz as a "museum" and corrects the guides and tourists by declaring it the "death camp" that it was. She is appalled by the focus on Stephen Spielberg and his film-making when they visit the Schindler factory, the guides seemingly forgetting the real people, the Jews, who were "working" there. Similarly, Auschwitz projects to her a sterile appearance, unlike Birkenau, where her father is able to reconstruct for her his experience among its crumbling ruins. The portrayal of Poland by Brett is of a grim, despairing place whose people seem to have held onto the antisemitism that had characterised the Holocaust years in which her parents' families were murdered. Interestingly, Ruth's response to these remnants of the past is much more disturbed than those of her father, who continues to remind her that these things were in the past.

There is also delightful humour sprinkled within the story, particularly Brett's portrait of her father's idiosyncratic use of English and his grand appetite. At 81, Edek is determined to look towards the future and encourages his saddened daughter to do the same. The novel moved me to tears as it steered clear of melodrama, but portrayed the inherited guilt of the survivors' daughter and her inability to come to terms with how her parents had suffered. The extent of this impact was intriguingly included as the voice of Rudolph Hoss, commandant of Auschwitz, invaded Ruth's psyche in extended conversations with him from his "Zweites Himmel's Lager" (like a waiting room in Hell). This convention was cleverly constructed by Brett to illuminate how deeply affected Ruth was by being in Poland and confronted with the reality of the deaths of all those people she would now never know.

[Ernie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have re-read this novel that I read in France some years ago and enjoyed it just as much, perhaps more so. Many readers will be reluctant to read a novel about a 42 year old daughter, Ruth, taking her very old father Edek, to re-visit the Auschwicz- Birkenau death camps sometime in the 1990’s and other possible readers could be lost or even insulted when I describe it as a comedy in the classical sense of that term.

Ruth has been to Poland before and has ideas about how her father should react as a Holocaust victim. To her surprise and often annoyance, Edek bears no desire for hate or revenge against the Poles: ‘Why blame them?’ He asks her. He delights in his re-found freedom with his first language and the simple pleasures of eating food which is frequently ‘out of this world’. He is proud that his daughter is rich, tells everyone and persuades Ruth to always hire the biggest Mercedes cars. He gets along well with the Poles, especially the car drivers and is always polite when Ruth finds many Poles insufferable, greedy, anti-Semitic racists. Ruth is really alarmed when Edek enjoys the company of flirtatious women. She has to keep correcting Poles who refer to the death camp as a museum and is horrified to see that tourist dollars matter more than history and that the guide and the other tourists are more interested in the visit from Stephen Spielberg for his Chindler’s List film settings.

The comedy comes from Ruth’s characteristic desire for order and certainty in contrast to Poland’s disorder and Edek’s anarchic pleasure in living for the present. He shows only a little sadness in the contrast of the drabness and lack of liveliness in his family home city of Lodz, in contrast to his youthful memories of it in 1938. Ruth was ‘ looking for something that was no longer there’; buildings and rooms disappointed and tombstones were no longer there. When they do find something, the tone changes and tears finally break out for both characters and this reader. Edek is allowed some anger at this climactic time.

For me, there was one aspect of the writing which annoyed me: Brett’s re-creation os a character, Hoss, the commandant of Auschwicz who becomes an imaginary person who invades Ruth’s head and with whom she has many conversations. I realise sadly that this device is used because Brett and her editor assumed that many readers would not know much about the vile history of the death camps. For me the horror was rekindled in the novel by the description of the chicanery and greed of those Poles who made a profit from their seizure of the property of their fellow Jewish citizens, even 54 years later.

[Pharlap · Rating 2 out of 5]

The title is completely confusing.
These words are repeated few times in the book - by a Gipsy clairvoyant, by a voice of Rudolf Höss a commandant of German Concentration and Death Camp - Auschwitz, by herself, but I do not see any relation to the story.
Similarly the voice of Rudolf Höss - my explanation is that has been used as a way to present some details on the background of Nazi idea of Jews extermination. As for me it brought more confusion than knowledge.
The story - an American business woman - Ruth organises for her, living in Melbourne, 81 years old father a tour of Poland, a place of his youth, a country where his family lived and where all of them were moved by Germans into the Auschwitz Death Camp.
Father - Edek - firstly does not see much sense in such a visit. Secondly, as should be expected - visiting familiar places brings back sad reflections. Thirdly - there are some positives - he immensely enjoys Polish food, although quantities of ham, eggs and cakes eaten by him as specified in the book are rather superhuman.
More importantly he finds a woman, who seems to be an ideal partner for his remaining years.
It is quite different story for Ruth.
She leads very satisfying life - own flourishing business, great care of health, diet, exercises, clothes, cosmetics.
There is a mention of 2 failed marriages, but she does not feel any lack of family.
Visit to Poland relives in her many traumas. It looks these are much stronger than traumas of some survivors, who, like Ruth's father, managed to erase them from day-today life.
Separate issue is her absolute disgust of life in Poland and behaviour of Polish people.
I found it very biased and exaggerated, but it is rather intimate, personal issue.

[Mark Stangroome · Rating 2 out of 5]

This is a difficult book for me to grade as there are some good elements but these are somewhat overshadowed by the major character, Ruth, being quite poorly written and some story-lines being superfluous.
The story revolves around Ruth, a successful American businesswomen inviting her Australian based father, Edek, to Poland where he was born and lived until after his incarceration in Auschwitz as she wishes to see the country of her heritage.
Edek was an enjoyable character who had a laissez-faire attitude to the atrocities that he had witnessed and experienced. Their shared 'holiday' took in various cities that he had connections with during his younger life. Edek did not wish ill upon the Poles or even the Germans but Ruth, who was not born until after the Second World War did hold grudges. Her character came across as jealous of any female anywhere near her father, intolerant of all Poles, ungracious and unable to accept that other cultures may play Jewish music, cook Jewish food, dance Jewish dances in-fact she seems to believe that only Jews can do anything Jewish.
My other problem is that the head of Auschwitz prison is introduced as a role player in the story and interacts with Ruth. This plot-line could have been made to work but didn't, eventually just disappearing without reason. I do not understand why this plot was ever introduced as it was disregarded so readily.

[Kristine · Rating 4 out of 5]

It made a contradictory impression on me, this book... The plot is very interesting and the setting is great. I visited Cracow and Auschwitz-Birkenau last year, so I was excited to see the place from the author's view. What I found is dubious..
I agree totally with many features about Polish landscape, cities, mood and character. I agree about the Poles, their unfriendliness, inexplicable rude face expression and unattractivenes of men (I am sorry)....probably it's just a matter of taste and the season. Bad weather, you know...
But many other details I find them based on bias. A lot of bias, prejudice, judgement and exaggeration.
I am also disappointed with the author's description of the Auschwitz-Birkenau camp. The guides are knowledgeable there and food is prohibited there, so no one enters through a cafeteria with coca cola in their hands. At least now, I am not sure about the 90ies.
The visitors are all respectful and I havent seen any badly mannered teanagers there.
The biased comparison of the "bad mannered" Polish teanagers with the "well behaved" Israelis group put me off, really.
This was a bit too much.
I wanted to skip all the meaningless conversations and dialogues about the food... Reading about what they had for breakfast everyday was irritating and I didn't get the importance of that part. What did the author want to highlight there?
But in general I enjoyed the book.

[Ella · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dit was voor mij een "reread". Ik ontdekte deze schrijfster in onze tijd in Australië en heb meerdere boeken van haar gelezen.
Edek is met zijn vrouw een van de overlevers van de "deathcamps" in Polen die na de oorlog naar Melbourne verhuisden. Hun dochter Ruth verhuist later naar New York. Ze heeft daar haar eigen bedrijf en maakt het financieel.
Na haar moeders dood wil ze met haar vader naar Polen. Ze heeft zich al haar hele leven verdiept in de familiegeschiedenis en weet alles over de kampen, over Hitler en consorten en over de rechtszaken na de oorlog. Niemand van haar familie leeft nog maar ze wil zien waar haar ouders voor de oorlog woonden en de plaatsen bezoeken waar zij in het ghetto en de kampen geweest zijn.
Het wordt natuurlijk een ontzettend emotionele reis. Ze ergert zich aan de voor haar beleving "toeristische attracties" die overal van gemaakt zijn. En vooral ergert ze zich aan de Polen.
Ze vinden spullen die bezit waren van Edeks ouders maar moeten exorbitante bedragen betalen om er iets van terug te kopen.
Ruth is erg sensitief en weet dingen waarvan haar vader zegt dat hij ze haar nooit heeft verteld. Ze heeft zelfs conversaties met Rudolf Hoss die de leiding had over "deathcamp" Auschwitz en na de oorlog is opgehangen in zijn eigen kamp.
Toch is het boek met veel humor en liefde geschreven. Ik vind het nog steeds een aanrader.

[Reader · Rating 2 out of 5]

Yet another book that got rave reviews it could not live up to. Another book I could not find the interest in finishing. (There have been 2, 4 that I had no interest in and I learned after the first 2 to cut my losses and stop reading.) I have taken advanced college coursework on the Holocaust and women in the Holocaust and found none of it dull. This book feels like a very forced attempt to try to fit historical facts and opinions into an interesting story. It doesn't work. It stereotypes a lot of people, the survivor, the female career Boomer, the child of survivors, the serial monogamist, the irreligious Jew whose only connection to Judaism is the Holocaust. The writing and opinions expressed are cringe worthy. It does seem perhaps like something that could happen, but I don't want to read it any more than I would enjoy a live feed direct from someone's head. It reminds me of an assignment I had in college to write about having a meal with a historical character and what we would talk about as a vehicle to list everything we had learned about the subject over the semester. My teacher loved the outcome, but an outsider giving me advice on it said, try to make it sound more natural and less like an assignment to creatively list everything you learned in the semester.

[Karen Levi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Quirky, whacky, mournful, and humorous—a poignant novel by an Australian writer was a worthwhile read for me. I followed the journey of Edek, a resilient Holocaust survivor, and his very neurotic daughter, Ruth, on a personal journey in Poland. The author’s descriptions are on point; I have visited these places. The book is too long, in part due to the imaginary character, who makes little sense. I am not sure what purpose this device serves. The characters are mostly funny and sweet, with the exception of an evil greedy couple.They personify greed and cruelty. Some of the scenes border on slapstick but comic relief is appropriate to ease the tension of reliving personal and historical tragedy.The author has done her research and brings to life the real-life challenges of being the daughter of Holocaust survivors.Edek is a wonderful character , flaws included. His daughter is nervous to the point of overdone exaggeration which becomes ridiculous and annoying. This book is for a particular audience—the children of survivors and people interested in the Holocaust in Poland.

[Katoushka · Rating 5 out of 5]

I had the privilege of being assigned this book to review for my university newspaper. An arts student at the time, I was studying The Holocaust in my final year - a coincidence, but a fortunate one. The book is so many things. Given my study, I had read a lot of books on the subject of the Holocaust—text books, survivor’s accounts, fiction based on fact—and I can say with honesty that after Primo Levi’s incomparable fist-hand accounts of life (or what passed for it) at Auschwitz and Birkenau (If This Is A Man) and the aftermath (The Truce), Too Many Men rates among the most insightful books on the subject. It is unique. Our narrator is Ruth, daughter of Holocaust survivors, who lives in New York. She has planned a trip to Poland with her aged father, much to his disgruntlement. The book takes us with them on Ruth’s insistent odyssey into the past, where she hopes to find peace of a sort, though she has no idea what that might be and how she might find it. I won’t go into further detail and risk ruining even a moment of this must-read book. I’ll just implore you to read it.

[Antoniette · Rating 3 out of 5]

There's so much good stuff in this book... the theme of generational trauma, the relationship between a father and daughter, the quirky characters and their interactions, etc. Sadly, it all gets a bit buried by some odd plot choices, namely the fact that the main character, Ruth, interacts with the ghost of a Nazi at random times throughout the book. These parts seemed to be included so that the author could weave in details of the horrors of the Nazi death camps, but they felt random and just didn't flow with the rest of the book. In fact, these segments made me feel like I was reading an entirely different book. Despite all this and the fact that I didn't love the writing, I did enjoy the book, overall, and I added the sequel to my TBR list because I felt a connection to the characters and am curious to see where life takes them.
Additional note: The audiobook narration was great.