Mail-Order Wings

by Beatrice Gormley

"Fly with your own wings!" said the ad in Andrea's comic book. "Money-back guarantee!" Andrea knew it couldn't be true, but she sent in her money for the wings kit anyway. What happened next was wonderful beyond imagining--and then very, very frightening.

Genres: Fantasy, Childrens, Middle Grade, Fiction, Young Adult

180 pages, Paperback

First published October 29, 1981

About the author

Born in Glendale, California, Beatrice grew up in Southern California. After graduating from Pomona College, she worked in publishing near San Francisco. There she met and married Robert Gormley, and they moved to Massachusetts. They have two daughters.
Since age 9 Beatrice had wanted to become a writer. But it wasn't until after her children were born that she really focused on her writing. In 1981 her first book, Mail Order Wings,was published. Since then she's written many popular novels and biographies for young people. Her most recent books are Second Lives, a novel of humans and other animals, and the biography Joe Biden: Our 46th President.

Reviews

[Steph · Rating 3 out of 5]

so i actually never encountered this 1980s middle grade novel when i was a child. but i stumbled upon it on goodreads and something compelled me to read it. perhaps i have a soft spot for stories of unexpected human-to-animal transformation (see my hairiest adventure and nightbitch).

anyway. this is a fun and surreal lil adventure. nine-year-old andrea finds herself slowly turning into a bird, and she's largely isolated as she experiences the transformation. she's a super brave and independent kid, but damn, it's tough to be on your own during this type of uncontrollable body horror situation.

the flying scenes are absolutely lovely. as a child i had recurring dreams of flying, and these dreamlike sequences brought back all those memories. such a beautiful sensation of pure freedom!

It was the colors. They weren't the regular nighttime black and gray. The grass was almost green. The leaves on the maple tree were almost red. She looked down at her hand, almost pink. This was a world in which anything could happen. A world in which Andrea could jump off the roof and fly all the way to the maple tree.

[Joel · Rating 5 out of 5]

THIS BOOK STILL HAUNTS ME.

It's like Kafka, you know, for kids!

[Anastasia · Rating 5 out of 5]

It's hard to sell grade-schoolers on reading Kafka. Mail Order Wings, believe it or not, is a reasonable alternative: it's about a girl who identifies with birds and desires to have the experience of flight. She orders a set of wings that are supposed to do just that from one of those sketchy advertisements in the back of a comic book. She assembles wings feather by feather and adheres them to her back, gaining the ability to fly at the expense of a few inconveniences like trying to hide her new wings from her parents. But all this newfound power starts to come at the cost of her identity, as she herself undergoes a Kafkaesque metamorphosis...

[Jo Everett · Rating 4 out of 5]

I don't know why exactly but this book has stayed in my mind ever since I first borrowed it from the library aged 12. There is something magical but also real about a girl who constructs a pair of wings out of a mail ordered kit from a magazine, then embarks on a journey to the company head-quarters as a reaction to a fear that the wings are turning her body into something of the feathered variety. One of the illustrations in particular of the head of the company who's face is a mash-up of a middle-aged man and an owl, has well and truly embedded itself into my mind. Gripping stuff!

[Swankivy · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked fantastical books about flying, sure, so when I saw a book featuring a girl with rainbow wings, I checked it out of the library. It turned out to be a really disturbing book, to some degree. The main character--a bird-watching enthusiast named Andrea--orders a set of wings from a comic book article, not really believing that they would actually allow her to fly. But after she assembles the wings according to the instructions, glues them to her back, and drinks a potion, she can fly, just like she'd always dreamed. The downfall, of course, is that she's now a girl with really obvious wings and that's hard to hide (though she can do so with difficulty, under a sweater). Things get even more freaky when she starts responding to bizarre avian instincts and fears she's turning into a bird. It's actually super creepy. But you do learn a lot about birds. Heh.

I showed this book to my sister during my first reading, and we giggled over the cover. When she asked about the book, I told her it was about a girl who bought wings through mail-order and glued them to her back. My sister responded with "Well that doesn't make sense, because gluing wings to your back wouldn't actually work for flying." Then I told her, "Well, then she has to drink juice that came with it," and my sister replied "Oh, that makes sense then." Then we looked at each other and were like, wait, what did we just say? Mail-order wings don't make sense, but drinking a magic potion to make them work is a lot more realistic. Ahh, we were silly kids.

I enjoyed it, even though it scared me when Andrea started feeling like a bird. I liked her practicing flying and how she realized that her fondest wish wasn't all it was cracked up to be.

[Anna Ryan-Punch · Rating 5 out of 5]

Like quite a few people it seems, this book has massive childhood memories for me. Given the library I borrowed it from, I must have been 8 when I read it. There’s a huge amount of detail in the wing assembly, learning to fly, the absolute joy of it, hiding your secret from your family - even the food you can get away with smuggling out. Aunt Bets is a gun and even brother Jim comes through. I’m not sold on the “Kafka for kids” line, it really doesn’t hold up under examination. Her experience can be a joy and a danger, it’s not beetles all the way down. Honk!

[Julie Decker · Rating 3 out of 5]

Andrea's obsessed with birds and really wishes she could fly like they do. When she comes across a silly ad in a comic book to order a pair of wings, she doesn't really believe the ad's claim that they'll allow her to fly, but soon enough she's glued the mail-order wings to her back and drunk the potion that came with it, and after that the wings actually work. She's overjoyed at being able to test them out in her bedroom and wonders about flying outside, but the inconveniences of hiding her wings in school are frustrating and a little scary. Her fears multiply when something transformative seems to be happening to her mind. Is she turning into a bird? And whose dastardly plot was this, anyway?

The book is a lot creepier than you'd probably expect when picking up a book about a girl with fake rainbow-colored wings she glued on. It's the sort of moderate body horror that mounts from the innocent beginning that does it: Andrea starts responding and feeling like a bird after a while, and when she's summoned by some force that appeals powerfully to the bird part of her, she's fighting with her last vestiges of humanity to avoid becoming a pawn in someone's game. The author did a good job with her first flight scenes, too, though they're a little goofy. The slight disappointment in this book comes from the simplicity of the premise: it kinda bugs me when a book that asks a compelling question and handles absurd situations relatively realistically has a bizarre mastermind behind it all whose motivation doesn't really make a lot of sense. Sinister outcomes don't always have to be powered by bad guys--it's just something I'm tired of seeing.

[Rebecca Grabill · Rating 5 out of 5]

Blast from the past. I read this in the 1980s, checking it out from the library over and over and over. I. Loved. This. Book. So. Hard. When I reread it as an adult I still loved it, though I realized how much of it I “missed” as a girl.

[Hannah]

Okay so I had a weirdly strong memory of this book from when I was a kid, and it was on Scribd (but the illustrations were not there? at least not on the mobile app?), so I figured why not. Wow is this a good concept wrapped in a hot mess of a book that did not age well at all

[Erin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read this when i was younger, loved it, just read it again recently. it was still pretty good!

[Wendy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kafka for kids! Creepy, but I liked it way back when. I don't think it's in print anymore, but maybe it should be.

[Amanda B · Rating 4 out of 5]

A favorite from childhood.

[Bookslut · Rating 3 out of 5]

Success! I tried reading this with the older girls when they were little, and they found it too terrifying to continue. The little kids ate it up, though there were some moments toward the end when they got a little twitchy. This is an interesting time capsule of a novel, because almost nothing in this book would be possible anymore. The 80's were the wild, wild west! It was captivating to me, reading in childhood, and I didn't have to suffer through in adulthood, so I would give it a solid 'holds up well over time' rating. It seems to not be for everyone, though, gauging on how my different sets of children took it in. The writing is workmanlike and there is no razzle dazzle here, but the plot is pretty thrilling.

I was so incredibly delighted to find a copy with the cover I had as a kid, from a used bookstore in my home city!!! It could literally be my copy, though there was no overcareful cursive scrawl of Casey M. Gee on the title page like I hoped to find.

[Lizzie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was one of my favourites from my childhood, and I loved it still on reread. It's really well structured, the first half the book we see Andrea having fun and fulfilling her dream of flying, and in the second half things start to go wrong and get a bit scary, until as the climax approaches Andrea starts to get a bit desperate... To be able to fly would be very cool, so I think that's why I always loved this book!

[Betty · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love to reminisce about how I read this book in 5th grade and it actually ignited in me a love for body horror that persists until today. Another review said this was like Kafka for kids and it's true. There's a creeping almost TwilightZone-esque dread to this book as you slowly realize what's actually happening. 10/10 kids should be able to have more weird books like this.

[Stephanie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Loved this book when I was a kid and read it again with my kids. It stood the test of time! It's a weird story that gets me thinking of flying. So happy I still liked it as an adult and loved sharing it with my girls!

[Cynthia · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a startling discovery. The main story is of a young girl who gets mail order wings which help her fly then she starts to turn into a bird. I love that she had to figure out herself how to use them, fly , hide them and eventually get rid of them. Well written!

[Georgia · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this as a kid and it still really bothers me.

[Gina · Rating 5 out of 5]

Cute, fast paced and charming. It'd be pretty silly if people didn't enjoy this book.

[Taryn · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5

[Greg Webster · Rating 4 out of 5]

Its interesting reading other reviews writing this book has stayed with them. I read it over 30 years ago and I still think about it occasionally. Really good YA before YA was a thing

[AS · Rating 1 out of 5]

I remember this as the first book I read as a kid where I finished it and realized I really didn’t like it, although I had expected I would. It felt very heavy and unpleasant.

[Minnikin]

Just as unsettling as it was 35 years ago.

[Keith · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this as a kid, it haunted my memory for decades, and I finally found the book name.

Well-written, simple, and completely creepy.

[Andrea · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was so clever (even if it's always weird to read about a character with my name).

[Hannah · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a cute book and easy read. From a teaching standpoint this would be perfect to have in the classroom! “Excelsior!”

[Robin Webster · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this in fourth grade and it has stayed with me all these years.

[Jordan Grieve · Rating 3 out of 5]

A book from my childhood that I had never read. It was a straight up science fiction style “this shit is actually happening for real” story which was half difficult to suspend belief but then also half refreshing that it wasn’t all just a dream. A fun read.

[K · Rating 3 out of 5]

I have a signed copy of this book. The author came to my school when I was a kid. I remember being slightly creeped out when she got her wings. Overall, I think I liked the book.

[Amy Flink · Rating 5 out of 5]

I first got into these books when I was in 5th grade. I read "Fifth Grade Magic" first and then I read this one. It is a very fictional, exciting and sometimes frightening story.
Andrea's bird-watching interests lead her to wish that she could fly. Andrea reads a comic book that she thinks is just horrible about parents rejecting their kid because he changes. It is a tragic story (the comic book) and it sort of leaves a deep impression on her. She doesn't know how anyone can be so horrible. Then she sees the order form for "Mail-Order Wings" and she has to have them! When they arrive she assembles them and has to glue them on.

I first read this book in 5th grade in 1987 and I loved it so much, it inspired me to make a movie of it! Also it was a bit frightening about what happens when your wish comes true: not always a good thing! Andrea discovers this. It was kinda gross when she starts turning into a bird, and sad when she is betrayed by her so-called "best friend" Lauren! That part angered me. This book sorta reminded me of The Fly or Elephant Man. It is very sad about how some "friends" betray their friends! Although Andrea didn't have an illness like Elephant Man, she is treated like dirt by that traitor Lauren, and Lauren, not to my knowledge, ever did apologize. That made me mad. I guess Lauren never knew about the wings (her brother Jim is the only one who knew), she treats Andi rudely by making fun of her birdnest collection and telling her she looked stupid wearing a heavy sweater (which was the only thing that could hide Andi's wings) on a hot day. Real nice, Lauren! Andi should have ditched this loser! We don't need any more traitors in this world! In the ending, Andi has to decide between her family and life as a human girl, or her new high-flying life as a bird. Sad, but necessary, and a valuable lesson on not taking anything for granted!

The message is to be careful what you pray for because it just might come true and if it does, that could be the worst thing that's ever happened to you. At first Andrea is on the top of the world as she soars out her bedroom window into the night sky. But then frightening things begin to happen. She begins to isolate herself from family and friends--her friends think she's strange. If you ask me, her "best friend" Lauren was a loser anyway. Andrea never felt so alone. Then she notices she is turning into a bird! What is she to do?