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Los Suegros: La guía Chapman para los suegros, los Yernos, las nueras y los cuñados
El tipo de relación que tenga con sus suegros afecta la relación que tiene con su esposa. Una relación positiva con sus suegros es una de las ventajas más grandes. Vivir en armonía, alentando y apoyándose mutuamente, ayuda a que todos alcancemos nuestro potencial. Por otra parte, las relaciones problemáticas con los suegros pueden ser una fuente de profundo dolor y amargura emocional. Cuando los suegros se rinden al resentimiento, la ira y el retraimiento, se unen a las filas de las familias en conflicto. Los siete principios que se proporcionan en este pequeño libro alentarán a aquellos que están luchando en las relaciones con sus suegros. Al mantener estos principios en la vida cotidiana, usted será recompensado con una relación fortalecida y de beneficio mutuo con sus suegros.
The kind of relationship you have with your in-laws affects the kind of relationship you have with your spouse. Positive in-law relationships are one of your greatest assets. Living in harmony, encouraging and supporting each helps all of us reach our potential. On the other hand, troublesome in-law relationships can be a source of deep emotional pain and bitterness. When in-laws give in to resentment, anger and withdrawal, they have joined the ranks of dysfunctional families. The seven principles shared in this little book will encourage those struggling with in-law relationships. If these principles are woven into the fabric of your daily life, you will be rewarded with a strengthened and mutually benefiting in-law relationship.
The kind of relationship you have with your in-laws affects the kind of relationship you have with your spouse. Positive in-law relationships are one of your greatest assets. Living in harmony, encouraging and supporting each helps all of us reach our potential. On the other hand, troublesome in-law relationships can be a source of deep emotional pain and bitterness. When in-laws give in to resentment, anger and withdrawal, they have joined the ranks of dysfunctional families. The seven principles shared in this little book will encourage those struggling with in-law relationships. If these principles are woven into the fabric of your daily life, you will be rewarded with a strengthened and mutually benefiting in-law relationship.
176 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2008
About the author
Gary Chapman
598 books3,599 followersGary Chapman, Ph.D.—author, speaker, and counselor—has a passion for people, and for helping them form lasting relationships.
Chapman is a well-known marriage counselor and director of marriage seminars. The 5 Love Languages® is one of Chapman’s most popular titles, topping various bestseller charts for years, selling over twenty million copies and has been on the New York Times bestsellers list since 2007. Chapman has been directly involved in real-life family counseling since the beginning of his ministry years, and his nationally syndicated radio programs air on Moody Radio Network and over 400 affiliate stations.
Chapman is a well-known marriage counselor and director of marriage seminars. The 5 Love Languages® is one of Chapman’s most popular titles, topping various bestseller charts for years, selling over twenty million copies and has been on the New York Times bestsellers list since 2007. Chapman has been directly involved in real-life family counseling since the beginning of his ministry years, and his nationally syndicated radio programs air on Moody Radio Network and over 400 affiliate stations.
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June 29, 2025
الكتاب بديهي بطريقه مهينه! وغير بديهي بطريقه مهينه!
دعني اشرح لك !
يخبرك تشابمان انك يجب ان تتحلي بالآتي نحو علاقه افضل مع حمويك :
١.الاحترام.
٢.مهارة بناء الحدود.
٣.مهاره الإستماع.
٤.مهاره النقاش بدون جدال.
٥.مهاره التوصل لحلول وسط.
لااعتقد انه يوجد انسان علي وجه الارض لايستطيع اعطاء محاضره عصماء في كل من هذه المهارات و نظم الكلام عن اهميتها واسبابها و معيقاتها و نتاءج العمل بها .
هذه هي الاهانه الاولي!
لا معلش لا يا تشابمان! ده احنا ياخويا نحترموك و نحترموك اوي كمان !
يضعك امام حقيقه : هل اذا زارك حمويك بدون استئذان عده مرات في الاسبوع بشكل اعترض واجبات اطفالك ووقتكم الخاص كعاءله بل وايضا مواعيد النوم والمدرسة، ستكون قادر علي تطبيق اي من المهارات المذكورة آنفا كما حدث لاحد عملاءه؟!
هنا الاهانه الثانية، الكتاب غير بديهي و هذا مهين !
انا اعرف الاحترام لكن كيف احترم من اذاني!
اعرف جيدا الاستماع لكن كيف استمع لمن يضايقني؟!
اعرف ان ابني حدودا لكن كيف احد من تدخل حماتي في حياه اسرتي الصغيره!
وانا اتناقش عن النووي و ايران وإسرائيل كإفطار و غذاء وعشاء و لكن كيف اتناقش مع حماي انني سأدخل ابني نظام دراسي مختلف عن نظامه الذي يعتنقه؟
ولا يفوقني احد في مهارات التواصل لكن حين يجب ان اتواصل مع حماواي حول المصيف العائلي السنوي يضيق صدري ولا ينطلق لساني!
الحقيقه ان جاري تشابمان هنا قالك السر لما قال : " كيف يمكنك الهروب من هذا نمط مدمر ؟ بالاختيار الواعي. أولا، عليك أن تدرك قيمة الكلام ؛ وبعد ذلك عليك أن تجربه.
عندما تتدرب فإنَّ ثمة احتمالا أكبر في أنك تستطيع التطبيق في سياق الأحاديث المباشرة.
إنك لن تقوم بترسيخ فن بين عشية وضحاها. ستسمع نفسك من وقت لآخر تقول عكس ما تتدرب عليه تدارك نفسك و أختر العكس بطريقه واعيه"
من الجميل جدا في كتب تشابمان انه بيحط امثله و طرق تطبيق عملي و ملخص ف آخر كل فصل علي شكل نقاط وده بيخلي الاستفاده اعمق.
وربنا المؤدب والمربي والهادي الي سواء السبيل.
دعني اشرح لك !
يخبرك تشابمان انك يجب ان تتحلي بالآتي نحو علاقه افضل مع حمويك :
١.الاحترام.
٢.مهارة بناء الحدود.
٣.مهاره الإستماع.
٤.مهاره النقاش بدون جدال.
٥.مهاره التوصل لحلول وسط.
لااعتقد انه يوجد انسان علي وجه الارض لايستطيع اعطاء محاضره عصماء في كل من هذه المهارات و نظم الكلام عن اهميتها واسبابها و معيقاتها و نتاءج العمل بها .
هذه هي الاهانه الاولي!
لا معلش لا يا تشابمان! ده احنا ياخويا نحترموك و نحترموك اوي كمان !
يضعك امام حقيقه : هل اذا زارك حمويك بدون استئذان عده مرات في الاسبوع بشكل اعترض واجبات اطفالك ووقتكم الخاص كعاءله بل وايضا مواعيد النوم والمدرسة، ستكون قادر علي تطبيق اي من المهارات المذكورة آنفا كما حدث لاحد عملاءه؟!
هنا الاهانه الثانية، الكتاب غير بديهي و هذا مهين !
انا اعرف الاحترام لكن كيف احترم من اذاني!
اعرف جيدا الاستماع لكن كيف استمع لمن يضايقني؟!
اعرف ان ابني حدودا لكن كيف احد من تدخل حماتي في حياه اسرتي الصغيره!
وانا اتناقش عن النووي و ايران وإسرائيل كإفطار و غذاء وعشاء و لكن كيف اتناقش مع حماي انني سأدخل ابني نظام دراسي مختلف عن نظامه الذي يعتنقه؟
ولا يفوقني احد في مهارات التواصل لكن حين يجب ان اتواصل مع حماواي حول المصيف العائلي السنوي يضيق صدري ولا ينطلق لساني!
الحقيقه ان جاري تشابمان هنا قالك السر لما قال : " كيف يمكنك الهروب من هذا نمط مدمر ؟ بالاختيار الواعي. أولا، عليك أن تدرك قيمة الكلام ؛ وبعد ذلك عليك أن تجربه.
عندما تتدرب فإنَّ ثمة احتمالا أكبر في أنك تستطيع التطبيق في سياق الأحاديث المباشرة.
إنك لن تقوم بترسيخ فن بين عشية وضحاها. ستسمع نفسك من وقت لآخر تقول عكس ما تتدرب عليه تدارك نفسك و أختر العكس بطريقه واعيه"
من الجميل جدا في كتب تشابمان انه بيحط امثله و طرق تطبيق عملي و ملخص ف آخر كل فصل علي شكل نقاط وده بيخلي الاستفاده اعمق.
وربنا المؤدب والمربي والهادي الي سواء السبيل.
June 9, 2020
عندما يتزوَّج شخصان، فإنهما لا يتزوَّج أحدهما الآخر فقط، بل يتزوَّجان داخل أسرة تتكوَّن من والدي الزوجين وربما أشقائهما، ويختلف كل شخص عن الآخر، وغالبًا ما تؤدي هذه الاختلافات إلى صعوبات قابلة للتعديل، وغالبًا ما تركز مشاكل الأنسباء على مسائل في السيطرة، والتدخل، وعدم الملاءمة، والتعارض في القيم والتقاليد، فيهدف هذا الكتاب إلى تقديم أفكار عملية حول كيفية التصرف خلال هذه الصراعات وبناء علاقات إيجابية مع الحموين، وتقوية الحياة الزوجية.
أفكار تستحق أن تذكر:
1-إن الهدف من الإصغاء هو اكتشاف ما يدور في أذهان الأشخاص الآخرين وفي قلوبهم. إذ فهمنا السبب الذي يدفع الناس إلى فعل ما يفعلونه، يمكننا الحصول على إجوبة أكثر ملائمة.
2-تبنى العلاقات بالسعي إلى الفهم، وتدمر بالمقاطعة والجدال.
3-يدفعني الاحترام إلى منح حمويّ الحرية نفسها التي سمح الله بها للبشر أجمعين_ حرية الاختلاف عن الآخر_ ولهذا لن أسعى إلى فرض إرادتي على حموي، بل على العكس، عندما أجد نفسي على خلاف معهما، سأبحث عن حل يحترم اختلافاتنا.
4-إن التعدي على الخصوصية هو مجال شائع للخلافات مع الحموين، ولكن حينما يُظهر الزوجان الأصغر سنًا الاحترام لأفكار أهلهما وحمويهما؛ ويشاركهم صراحة شعورهما بالإحباط، فإن المشاكل يمكن أن تُسوى.
5-لا يمكننا أن نتوقع أن تسوى خلافاتنا كلها بين عشية وضحاها أو بحديث واحد..يستغرق الأمر وقتًا وجهدًا لفهم وجهة نظر الطرف الآخر، وللتفاوض على حلول لخلافاتنا، إنها عملية تستمر مدى الحياة، وهي في الوقت نفسه جوهر العلاقات وروحها.
أفكار تستحق أن تذكر:
1-إن الهدف من الإصغاء هو اكتشاف ما يدور في أذهان الأشخاص الآخرين وفي قلوبهم. إذ فهمنا السبب الذي يدفع الناس إلى فعل ما يفعلونه، يمكننا الحصول على إجوبة أكثر ملائمة.
2-تبنى العلاقات بالسعي إلى الفهم، وتدمر بالمقاطعة والجدال.
3-يدفعني الاحترام إلى منح حمويّ الحرية نفسها التي سمح الله بها للبشر أجمعين_ حرية الاختلاف عن الآخر_ ولهذا لن أسعى إلى فرض إرادتي على حموي، بل على العكس، عندما أجد نفسي على خلاف معهما، سأبحث عن حل يحترم اختلافاتنا.
4-إن التعدي على الخصوصية هو مجال شائع للخلافات مع الحموين، ولكن حينما يُظهر الزوجان الأصغر سنًا الاحترام لأفكار أهلهما وحمويهما؛ ويشاركهم صراحة شعورهما بالإحباط، فإن المشاكل يمكن أن تُسوى.
5-لا يمكننا أن نتوقع أن تسوى خلافاتنا كلها بين عشية وضحاها أو بحديث واحد..يستغرق الأمر وقتًا وجهدًا لفهم وجهة نظر الطرف الآخر، وللتفاوض على حلول لخلافاتنا، إنها عملية تستمر مدى الحياة، وهي في الوقت نفسه جوهر العلاقات وروحها.
August 21, 2021
ثاني قراءة لي مع الكاتب غاري تشامبان كانت مذهلة كما المرة الأولى في كتابه لغات الحب الخمس فقد ابهرني باسلوبه البسيط ولغته السهلة ونصائحه التي تكون في الصميم بلا تكرار وشعور بالملل عند قراءة أسطر كتبه فهو يقدم فقط ما تحتاج إليه
بلا لف ولا دوران وباسلوب مقنع وهذا نادرا ما تجده عند كتاب التنمية البشرية والذي أعيبه فيهم بشدة
في هذا الكتاب تحدث عن أهمية العلاقة بين الزوجين والاهل بصفة عامة وليس فقط الآباء إذ ان من السهل الميل إلى العداء والمقاطعة ولكن الإحساس بالذنب يظل مدى الحياة فهو يشير في كتابه إلى تقبل الاختلاف والصبر على الآخر لأن كل ذلك يؤدي إلى المحبة
بلا لف ولا دوران وباسلوب مقنع وهذا نادرا ما تجده عند كتاب التنمية البشرية والذي أعيبه فيهم بشدة
في هذا الكتاب تحدث عن أهمية العلاقة بين الزوجين والاهل بصفة عامة وليس فقط الآباء إذ ان من السهل الميل إلى العداء والمقاطعة ولكن الإحساس بالذنب يظل مدى الحياة فهو يشير في كتابه إلى تقبل الاختلاف والصبر على الآخر لأن كل ذلك يؤدي إلى المحبة
January 8, 2014
A lot of the content overlaps with "How to Win Friends and Influence People" and goes back to the idea of building character.
Listen Before You Speak: Be inquisitive. Ask questions and be genuinely curious to learn about the other person. Get to know them as a human being. Learn their story.
Learn the Art of Showing Respect
Speak for yourself, not others.
Be negotiable.
Make requests, not demands. People aren't your slave or servant. Respect their right to decline what you've asked. They're not in the wrong in doing so. When they do, express gratitude.
Listen Before You Speak: Be inquisitive. Ask questions and be genuinely curious to learn about the other person. Get to know them as a human being. Learn their story.
Learn the Art of Showing Respect
Speak for yourself, not others.
Be negotiable.
Make requests, not demands. People aren't your slave or servant. Respect their right to decline what you've asked. They're not in the wrong in doing so. When they do, express gratitude.
April 14, 2016
I didn't finish. As a Christian, I appreciate a biblical outlook on things. It was a nice reminder of what "honoring your parents" really means, but I didn't find the techniques given as being able to realistically work with in-laws who do not have have a Christian background. May be okay for those experiencing minor problems, but for any major issues I would recommend "Toxic In-Laws" by Susan Forward, which I found much more helpful.
June 25, 2020
مثل كل مره عندما يكون الكاتب من مجتمع غير مجتمعنا توجد افكار لا يمكن أن تطبق في مجتمعنا
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May 2, 2026O livro apresenta a visão de Gary Chapman, ressaltando que um relacionamento ruim com sogros e cunhados pode minar o casamento e que construir uma conexão saudável é prioridade. O tema é espinhoso porque é algo quase universal, com queixas como sogra aparecendo sem avisar, cunhada tentando ensinar a cozinhar ou parentes interferindo nas decisões, e a raiz do problema costuma ser controle, interferência e conflito de valores. A ideia central é o paradoxo do casamento: para fortalecer o relacionamento é preciso, ao mesmo tempo, separar-se dos pais e honrá-los. Do lado do afastamento, prioriza-se o cônjuge, a independência psicológica e a tomada de decisões em dupla para formar uma nova unidade; do lado da honra, mantém-se o respeito, a dignidade, a comunicação aberta e o apoio quando necessário, equilibrando distância e vínculo.
A chave prática para esse equilíbrio é ouvir antes de falar, uma regra de ouro que busca entender a mente e o coração do outro em vez de vencer a discussão. O objetivo não é transformar o diálogo em confronto, mas compreender a motivação por trás do comportamento dos parentes. Para ilustrar, o texto conta a história da Marcha e da sogra rica: toda vez que a sogra comprava vestidos caros, Marcha se ressentia por considerar extravagância. Seguindo a orientação de Chapman, ela usou uma fórmula de três passos: perguntar, em uma escala de 1 a 10, o quanto a sogra aprecia essas compras; se a nota for alta, perguntar por que isso a faz se sentir bem; e, principalmente, ouvir para entender a motivação por trás do gesto. Ao fazer isso, descobriu-se que a sogra comprava para retribuir um sentimento de escassez vivenciado no passado, não para controlar, e a relação entre elas se transformou de conflito para parceria.
Com esse tipo de prática, o livro apresenta um guia prático de comunicação para hábitos diários: diferenciar comunicação destrutiva — interromper, discordar para vencer, fazer suposições sobre o pensamento do outro — da comunicação construtiva — fazer perguntas claras, evitar interrupções, parafrasear o que foi entendido e usar a escala para medir a importância de cada tema. A ideia é não apenas ouvir, mas ouvir para entender de verdade, tornando-se um investigador ativo da perspectiva do outro. Assim, a grande lição permanece: entender a motivação por trás das ações dos parentes é fundamental para transformar a dinâmica familiar e manter o casamento forte, preparando o terreno para aplicar essas estratégias em situações reais que virão a seguir. Como essa abordagem pode ser levada adiante nos próximos exemplos, vamos acompanhar novas situações que testam esse método de ouvir antes de reagir e de buscar a compreensão profunda antes de agir.
Ao pensar nisso, fica claro que compreender o motivo por trás de cada atitude não é apenas uma técnica de convivência, mas uma forma de humanizar as interações. Quando a gente entende o porquê da ação, a raiva e a frustração tendem a diminuir, abrindo espaço para respostas mais eficazes e compassivas. Essa mudança de perspectiva transforma não apenas o diálogo, mas a própria reação diante dos familiares do cônjuge, promovendo um clima de parceria em vez de confrontação.
Essa ideia de “ouvir para entender” se conecta com a ideia anterior de que muitas tensões derivam de histórias não contadas ou mal compreendidas dentro da dinâmica familiar. O texto conclui convidando o leitor a identificar histórias que ainda não foram ouvidas em casa, reconhecendo que grande parte dos mal-entendidos surge exatamente de narrativas não compartilhadas ou não escutadas com atenção. Ao reconhecer essa lacuna, abre-se espaço para que o casal crie novas narrativas conjuntas, fortalecendo a comunicação e a empatia. Em última análise, o convite é mover-se de um ciclo de reação para um ciclo de diálogo significativo, onde cada história ganha voz e cada motivo é explorado com curiosidade, para que as diferenças sejam integradas de forma construtiva dentro do relacionamento e da família ampliada.
A chave prática para esse equilíbrio é ouvir antes de falar, uma regra de ouro que busca entender a mente e o coração do outro em vez de vencer a discussão. O objetivo não é transformar o diálogo em confronto, mas compreender a motivação por trás do comportamento dos parentes. Para ilustrar, o texto conta a história da Marcha e da sogra rica: toda vez que a sogra comprava vestidos caros, Marcha se ressentia por considerar extravagância. Seguindo a orientação de Chapman, ela usou uma fórmula de três passos: perguntar, em uma escala de 1 a 10, o quanto a sogra aprecia essas compras; se a nota for alta, perguntar por que isso a faz se sentir bem; e, principalmente, ouvir para entender a motivação por trás do gesto. Ao fazer isso, descobriu-se que a sogra comprava para retribuir um sentimento de escassez vivenciado no passado, não para controlar, e a relação entre elas se transformou de conflito para parceria.
Com esse tipo de prática, o livro apresenta um guia prático de comunicação para hábitos diários: diferenciar comunicação destrutiva — interromper, discordar para vencer, fazer suposições sobre o pensamento do outro — da comunicação construtiva — fazer perguntas claras, evitar interrupções, parafrasear o que foi entendido e usar a escala para medir a importância de cada tema. A ideia é não apenas ouvir, mas ouvir para entender de verdade, tornando-se um investigador ativo da perspectiva do outro. Assim, a grande lição permanece: entender a motivação por trás das ações dos parentes é fundamental para transformar a dinâmica familiar e manter o casamento forte, preparando o terreno para aplicar essas estratégias em situações reais que virão a seguir. Como essa abordagem pode ser levada adiante nos próximos exemplos, vamos acompanhar novas situações que testam esse método de ouvir antes de reagir e de buscar a compreensão profunda antes de agir.
Ao pensar nisso, fica claro que compreender o motivo por trás de cada atitude não é apenas uma técnica de convivência, mas uma forma de humanizar as interações. Quando a gente entende o porquê da ação, a raiva e a frustração tendem a diminuir, abrindo espaço para respostas mais eficazes e compassivas. Essa mudança de perspectiva transforma não apenas o diálogo, mas a própria reação diante dos familiares do cônjuge, promovendo um clima de parceria em vez de confrontação.
Essa ideia de “ouvir para entender” se conecta com a ideia anterior de que muitas tensões derivam de histórias não contadas ou mal compreendidas dentro da dinâmica familiar. O texto conclui convidando o leitor a identificar histórias que ainda não foram ouvidas em casa, reconhecendo que grande parte dos mal-entendidos surge exatamente de narrativas não compartilhadas ou não escutadas com atenção. Ao reconhecer essa lacuna, abre-se espaço para que o casal crie novas narrativas conjuntas, fortalecendo a comunicação e a empatia. Em última análise, o convite é mover-se de um ciclo de reação para um ciclo de diálogo significativo, onde cada história ganha voz e cada motivo é explorado com curiosidade, para que as diferenças sejam integradas de forma construtiva dentro do relacionamento e da família ampliada.
October 15, 2024
Needy and timely subject. I really enjoyed and learned from the insights in this book. Below are some of my personal takeaways:
Relationships are built by seeking understanding, and they are torn down by interruptions and arguments.
If you greet and treat others with respect, they will be more willing to listen to your point of view.
Learn the art of respect. Respect is a major ingredient in building positive in-law relationships.
Respect allows freedom of choice. The opposite of respect is manipulation.
You cannot gain respect by showing disrespect.
Ideas should be shared as suggestions, not demands. You can respect another person‘s ideas without having to follow their ideas.
“You” statements usually start fights. Use “I” statements.
Negotiation is the opposite of withdrawal and resentment.
Grant the gift of freedom. The greatest gift that parents can give to their married children is freedom.
Don’t make your married children dependent on you. Marriage is about independence, not dependence.
You don’t build positive in-law relationships by making negative comments about someone else’s interests.
The ultimate key that unlocks the door of becoming friends with your in-laws is an attitude of love.
If you want to help your in-laws, find out what they believe is helpful instead of using your own judgment.
Genuine love is seldomly rejected, but someone must take the initiative to love.
If you’re going to love your in-laws, you need kindness and patience.
Failures call for apologies and apologies call for forgiveness.
Relationships are built by seeking understanding, and they are torn down by interruptions and arguments.
If you greet and treat others with respect, they will be more willing to listen to your point of view.
Learn the art of respect. Respect is a major ingredient in building positive in-law relationships.
Respect allows freedom of choice. The opposite of respect is manipulation.
You cannot gain respect by showing disrespect.
Ideas should be shared as suggestions, not demands. You can respect another person‘s ideas without having to follow their ideas.
“You” statements usually start fights. Use “I” statements.
Negotiation is the opposite of withdrawal and resentment.
Grant the gift of freedom. The greatest gift that parents can give to their married children is freedom.
Don’t make your married children dependent on you. Marriage is about independence, not dependence.
You don’t build positive in-law relationships by making negative comments about someone else’s interests.
The ultimate key that unlocks the door of becoming friends with your in-laws is an attitude of love.
If you want to help your in-laws, find out what they believe is helpful instead of using your own judgment.
Genuine love is seldomly rejected, but someone must take the initiative to love.
If you’re going to love your in-laws, you need kindness and patience.
Failures call for apologies and apologies call for forgiveness.
June 25, 2022
I really liked this book. What great tips for navigating the addition of in-laws to your family. I do wish it was cast it's net over a large pool as it focused mostly on parent-in-laws (yes, the tools you learn can be applied to other in-law relationships). It would have been nice hearing about how couples navigated brother and sister-in-laws a bit more. And I kind of wish some of the in-law concerns were a bit heavier. That's not to undermine the concerns Gary Chapman discussed, they were all informative and important, I was just hoping for a bit more than what was delivered. I am considering suggesting this book to my own mother though, and I think that alone should speak for my thoughts on the my hope in the helpfulness of this text.
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February 4, 2025Love is kind love is patient :)
You can express desires of how you want the relationship to be and set goals for both of you to try and achieve.
Gentle words help and build relationships. Building relationships takes time and can’t be quickly fixed.
Pray specifically for God to help you build the relationship because we are supposed to honor and respect. With honor and respect we can listen when we don’t agree and try to see issues through their eyes.
When dealing with a conversation about conflict don’t point fingers when you don’t see how they see and perceive the situation
My personal note is I wish there is more on dealing with the last type of in-laws mentioned.
You can express desires of how you want the relationship to be and set goals for both of you to try and achieve.
Gentle words help and build relationships. Building relationships takes time and can’t be quickly fixed.
Pray specifically for God to help you build the relationship because we are supposed to honor and respect. With honor and respect we can listen when we don’t agree and try to see issues through their eyes.
When dealing with a conversation about conflict don’t point fingers when you don’t see how they see and perceive the situation
My personal note is I wish there is more on dealing with the last type of in-laws mentioned.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
November 8, 2017
This book contains a lot of common sense communication skills that seem, somehow, harder to master with in-laws, who come with a sort of instant intimacy that people have trouble navigating. It's a short book; each chapter puts forth one of Chapman's principles, gives some anecdotes, then recaps. It can easily be read in one evening.
I would also recommend this for parents and their adult children who are single. A lot of the advice has to do with respecting privacy and autonomy, and transitioning from the parent/child relationship into a relationship between two adults.
I would also recommend this for parents and their adult children who are single. A lot of the advice has to do with respecting privacy and autonomy, and transitioning from the parent/child relationship into a relationship between two adults.
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September 5, 2019No background needed. ;)
Chapman offers good advice... and, of course, can't cover every situation. One thing that did bother me is that it seems that there are two sets of advice. One for the parents and one for the children. Nothing wrong with that but it could have been better organized so it was clearly separated (when it needed to be).
Chapman offers good advice... and, of course, can't cover every situation. One thing that did bother me is that it seems that there are two sets of advice. One for the parents and one for the children. Nothing wrong with that but it could have been better organized so it was clearly separated (when it needed to be).
September 16, 2020
Interference with in-laws is really a big deal for couples, that is why I consider this book as actually an A Must Read book especially if you have difficult times dealing with your in-laws..It entails simple steps and guides to build a relationship with them, at the same time a hint for them to ponder too.
March 28, 2024
Format: audiobook
Narrator voice: male, easy to listen to
Actual rating (with decimals): 3.5
Overall review:
This is a great, jumping off point. I’m not sure that this book until everything I wanted. I wish there was a PDF that accompanied it with some quick tips/points. Overall, it was OK. Definitely not one of Gary Chapman‘s finest works.
Narrator voice: male, easy to listen to
Actual rating (with decimals): 3.5
Overall review:
This is a great, jumping off point. I’m not sure that this book until everything I wanted. I wish there was a PDF that accompanied it with some quick tips/points. Overall, it was OK. Definitely not one of Gary Chapman‘s finest works.
September 9, 2018
This is a short and useful book, but some tipp are too general.
Ez egy rövid és hasznos könyvecske, de néhány ötlet túl általános.
Ez egy rövid és hasznos könyvecske, de néhány ötlet túl általános.
October 10, 2018
Bom bem explicado e objetivo, mas o livro "As 5 Linguagens do Amor" é bem melhor
February 19, 2020
Very insightful. I look forward to applying the principles someday
August 8, 2022
Pretty good
November 14, 2023
Really practical, easy-to-read book!
January 8, 2024
Este libro me ayudo muchisimo a corregir algunos problemas que esta a ocasionando en nuestro matrimonio. Me encanto.
May 1, 2025
Easy read and beneficial
December 26, 2018
This book is great. Much of the information is something we think we already know, or should know. However, it’s so helpful reading reinforcement from a man who is very well educated in the area. Not only does this book give good advice on navigating in laws but it’s good advice for all close relationships. Worth the read, and frequent reread to renew a better attitude, outlook and reminder of boundaries.
March 12, 2017
A very quick book. It's pretty practical and a little bit insightful. Although I don't feel he addresses well enough how to work with an already disintegrated relationship. I feel like I'll probably forget what he said exactly in a few days but probably keep the gist of it.
Not amazing, but it was ok. Like a little book of tips, not a full volume to help you solve your problems.
Not amazing, but it was ok. Like a little book of tips, not a full volume to help you solve your problems.
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July 6, 2016This book is intended for both sons and daughters-in-law and mothers and fathers-in-law. Rather than being offended at your in-laws actions, try to understand them and see if they are actually just trying to show love in a misguided way. Be grateful for their intentions and show them you understand where they are coming from before asking for change. In cases of abuse, set firm boundaries.
May 27, 2009
Wish I would have read this book about 14 years ago! Simple, common sense but for some reason it takes us all a while to "get it" I kind of had to figure them all out the hard way. I will definately pick it up and read it again when I am a Mother-In-Law! It will come if very very handy!
July 11, 2009
It gave me interesting tips on how to behave with people. I haven't used them with a mother-in-law yet, but I will.
July 24, 2009
informative
September 25, 2009
I read this in Spanish and it's one of those useful books that after reading I send to Chile. It helps you think about your in-laws from a "human" perspective. Highly recommnded!
March 5, 2010
Most of the ideas in this book are plainly obvious. Some helpful info and good reminders.
April 2, 2020
Considero como comportamentos básico de como viver em sociedade. Mas uma lembrança para os esquecidos, com muita transcrição bíblica.
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