Love in 90 Days: The Essential Guide to Finding Your Own True Love

by Diana Kirschner

Finding true love is possible in just 90 days. Renowned clinical psychologist, Dr. Diana Kirschner, uses the latest research, clinical and personal experience to show you how. Dr. Diana knows the questions single women everywhere face: "Why am I attracted to the wrong kind of guys?" "Why is he just not that into me?" "Why can't I seem to find the One?" She also knows the unconscious mistakes that women make over and over again in love-regardless of age, work success, or the type of men they are dating.

Over the years Dr. Diana has received countless inquiries from single women about writing a how-to guide on her work. Love in 90 Days: The Essential Guide to Finding Your Own True Love is that book.


Love in 90 Days is fun, savvy and based on the latest research on singles, online dating and healthy relationships. Loaded with step-by-step instructions, checklists, and weekly homework assignments, this revolutionary love book is also an intensely personal journey for each reader. Love in 90 Days guides you along your own path towards self discovery with proven and effective dating advice and tough love. Dr. Diana dispels common misconceptions about love relationships and dating, and share personal stories from women who have successfully completed the Love in 90 Days Program. There's also a chapter devoted to the special issues faced by African-American women, single mothers, and women forty-five and older.

Genres: Self Help, Relationships, Nonfiction, Love

368 pages, Paperback

First published January 2, 2008

About the author

Hi, I'm Dr. Diana . . .

You may know me from my appearances as a guest psychologist on The Today Show or my PBS TV Special on Finding True Love. I've helped thousands of women all over the world use simple dating and relationship secrets in the most miraculous way--to finally find the passionate Soulmate love that is their heart's desire. Please visit me & get bi-weekly support from my free newsletter at http://www.lovein90days.com/free-dati....

Here’s what Hoda Kotb, co-anchor, The Today Show, NBC News (now in a great relationship & happy with a wonderful daughter) had to say about my dating program:

“Diana's theory makes sense! For several months I followed the program and enjoyed the process. I appreciate her planting very helpful seeds!”

I'm over-the-moon excited to tell you that my bestselling dating book,https://www.amazon.com/Love-90-Days-E... LOVE IN 90 DAYS, (which has been called THE dating coach's secret weapon!), is being published in an expanded version. It includes:

• From Shy to Meeting a Great Guy! One Simple Step to Irresistible Self-Confidence (new chapter)
• Swipe Right to Love! How to Use Tinder and Other Apps to Find Your Perfect Soulmate
• How to Avoid Online Romance Scams and Bots (Computer programs posing as humans!) that Steal Your Money, Time and Heart
• How to Have Irresistible BODY self-confidence No Matter what Your Weight or Size
• The Single Most Important Step to Rapid Healing from Heartbreak
• One Key Secret to Using Affirmations to Activate True Love in Your Life
• The Rise of Ghosting and How to Protect Yourself Against Feeling Rejected or Abandoned
• How to Partake in the Love Feast: The Love Mentor®’s Way to Finding Your Perfect Soulmate

Enjoy!!!!
And when you meet your soulmate, please post a review and a photo on the LOVE IN 90 DAYS Amazon page!!!! I can't wait to see it!!!

Wishing you love beyond your wildest dreams!
Dr. Diana xoxoxo

Reviews

[Bridget · Rating 5 out of 5]

I never really had a problem finding guys. My problem was finding a good guy. Even though I am happily married, I still want to learn all that I can because I want this love to last forever. One thing that was difficult for me was learning to love myself. How can you expect someone to fall in love with you if you don't think that you are worthy of love? Understanding yourself is the key to learning what you want and need out of a relationship. This book is a great guide to loving yourself, your friends and a lover.

The step-by-step instructions are easy to understand but aren't always easy to follow. The heart has different ideas than the brain and one thing you can take away from this book is knowing that the heart and the brain must reach a common ground before a relationship can blossom.

I really liked this book because Diana talks to you like a friend. She doesn't make you feel stupid and she truly understands how important love is in life.

[Lynne Torgersen · Rating 2 out of 5]

I think this woman is out of her mind. All the things she is suggesting for women to do in order to find a man would take a helluva lot more time that I have available in my life. Plus I've been using the online dating sites for years and I'm lucky if I can get one date with a guy every few months let alone find 3 to date on a regular basis.

One thing the book has done for me is convinced me that I am better off being single and if I'm truly meant to be with someone then God will make that happen.

[Sarah Sammis · Rating 1 out of 5]

Love in 90 Days by Diana Kirschner is not a book I would have read or agreed to review if I had been asked. I am not part of her narrowly defined target audience. Except for the fact that I am female and was one upon a time briefly single I am not nor would ever have been interested in this book. Yet a publicist rather than risk taking "no" (I would have been polite about it) sent it to me unsolicited. Now I could have just given the book away or wild released it through BookCrossing but I would prefer to instead give one negative review amongst all the fawning praise this book has garnered (mostly from the press). I have a feeling there were many more unsolicited copies sent out to regular book blogs such as mine that have been quietly disposed of.

Love in 90 Days has a catchy and promising title. Were it as inclusive of more kinds of romantic partnerships as Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson is, then the advice might actually be useful and credible. The problem I have with this book is it is designed solely for single heterosexual women who want to find the perfect hunk among all those eligible bachelors out there because of course that is the one true road to happiness! (Sorry guys of either sexual orientation or lesbians).

Kirschner mentions studies that show married people are happier, healthier and more secure in their lives than their single counterparts. What she doesn't mention is that correlations do not equal cause and effect. Happy, healthy and secure people might be more likely to seek out or find relationships because they are happy, healthy and secure.

The book offers advice on how to attract a man and includes things like how to make yourself pretty (gag), how to flirt with threatening men in public places (yikes!), how to do online dating and speed dating (how infomercially!) and finally the importance of dating three men at once to fine THE ONE. Oh yeah, and you had best be white, well educated and not too fat for this program to work. Otherwise you have to do extra credit for your problem areas (bletch).

To wrap everything together in this 90 day program there are sets of affirmations and daily journal writing. These homework assignments. Because of course writing things like "I am a good person and I deserve love" x number of times a day will of course cure you of whatever funk you're in. Or you might actually be depressed!

When I was briefly single I suddenly found myself being pursued by three men. One man clearly just wanted to get in my pants, one might have been okay but rubbed the wrong way and then there was the smart one who was a great conversationalist and a bit of a klutz. From my own limited experience, three is too many to handle at once. I felt so much better when I gave two of the three the heave-ho. I stuck with the klutz and later married him. We've been a couple now for almost 18 years.

Now had this book existed 18 years ago and had I been foolish enough to read it, I probably would have gussied myself up and gone after the drop dead gorgeous player despite my better judgment. I would have ended up just another of the drunk floozies who hung out in his room until they dropped out of college with an std or two. See if you by the STUD or DUD test, Mr. player would have gotten higher points on the STUD test because he knew how to play the game (and he ran the dorm's bible study group).

[Judith Joshel · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the best book on the market for women wanting to find Mr. Right and to create a loving committed relationship with him. I am a dating and relationship coach and it's required reading for all my clients. Dr. Diana is a world-renowned expert psychologist who shares her vast knowledge around finding and creating a great loving relationship. The book deals with all the ways women sabotage themselves in the dating world and has specific information on how to meet guys, how to date, what to look for when vetting the guys you meet, and how to understand men. I would advise any woman longing for the love of her life to study and follow the wisdom presented in this book.

[Kimberly · Rating 5 out of 5]

Now, in my Pantheon of relationship books, it might seem that I'm a cupid addict. I'm actually far from it. I consider it a challenge (not a curse) of someone always learning and searching for more information. I've read every type of relationship book (it seems) in a quest of knowledge and humor. But, I'm in on the joke. Every book says pretty much the same thing, yet slightly different.

So, how does "Love in 90 Days: The Essential Guide to Finding Your Own True Love" shape up in the scheme of other books? Better than average, actually. In fact, the distinctive difference between this book and the other are the following:

1. Kirschner highlights the counterproductive dating types that most women go for before they realize that they will never get the results they want (a relationship, marriage, commitment, etc)

2. She advocates online dating and approaches it in a way that promotes dating as a "numbers game".

3. Dating three men at once so you don't become obsessed with one man before he shows honest signs of commitment is also a key selling point for Kirschner.

4. Her signs of a DUD vs a STUD are refreshing. However, what's really interesting is her inclusion of "a man that is willing to learn / grow spiritually and is emotionally in touch with himself" is distinctively different from other relationship books.

5. Her specialty chapter 11, in which she speaks directly to those insecure about being Black and dating, Smart and dating, With kids, any other insecurity you could think of that your social group has stated that makes you "less than", shock me. I would recommend this book just for that.

In short, in reading her book and practicing her techniques, can you really find love in 90 days? Sure. Would I recommend this book to read? Yes. Why? The text is approachable and friendly. Kirschner does not assault the assumed female reader with harsh demands on looks and how to conform yourself to a stereotypical light that "Men" want. In fact, her Diamond Self section is rather enjoyable in that is pushes you to cultivate your own inner beauty spark.

So, read it. It can't hurt - only help and heal.

*Note, the social group / love mentor / support area that she says is available on her website is no longer there.

[Marta hoelscher · Rating 5 out of 5]

By Diana Kirschnew, PhD



Hardcover: 336 pages
Publisher: Center Street (January 2, 2009)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1599951223
ISBN-13: 978-1599951225
"In LOVE IN 90 DAYS, Dr. Diana reveals the secrets to finding Mr. Right and the crucial steps single women can take to create fulfilling love that lasts. Most singles unconsciously make the same mistakes over and over again in love, regardless of age, work success, or the type of man they are dating. Using her unique four-pronged approach, Dr. Diana pulls no punches. She outlines a program that gets women on the path to smash through their self-sabotage and forge a healthy love relationship."

This book is awesome! It is so practical! It's not filled with a bunch of feel good tactics that are so far out that they won't work. We've all read those books, ladies. Instead, Diana Kirschner lays out a step by step plan to getting into the dating pool and doing it in a very thought out way. No more jumping into things, take them slowly, make the right decisions. This is a book I think every woman should read in her early dating years. What a lot of mistakes it would have saved me!
Love In 90 Days blog: http://blog.lovein90days.com/
Love In 90 Days website: http://www.lovein90days.com/
Webisodes: Love In 90 Days bootcamp: http://www.lovein90daysbootcamp.com/
Interview on Blogtalk Radio With Diana Kirschner HERE

[Zack Lewis · Rating 5 out of 5]

Yes, I'm a guy and I read this book...but hear me out.

Most of us read books by other Men about how to attract women without taking into consideration the perspective and insight of the women we are pursuing themselves. Diana beautifully illustrates much of the hardship and struggles wonderful women have in finding their true love - I say wonderful women because I mean women that come in all shapes and sizes, passions and interests with one common denominator - looking for a life partner.

As a guy reading this book and taking in her decades of experience learning and studying women and their dating habits, it has provided me with a great deal of valuable information for how I as well can meet and attract the right woman - one of substance, beauty and intimate connection. While I have not gotten there yet, I have been on plenty of dates learning to accept the love I feel strong to deserve instead of grasping at whatever would come my way...probably one of the most valuable lesson I took for her assignments of improving our self image to become the person we wish to attract.

Thank you Diana xoxoxo

[Jaye · Rating 4 out of 5]

I typically don't pay titles like this any mind but I'm actually glad I picked this one up. It's very detailed and insightful. It's almost like therapy in a book. I would have to say that Dr. Diana is a very skilled professional and has many good suggestions on ways a woman can change negative patterns and beliefs.

The only thing I didn't like was the part where she said that a woman should go on roller coaster rides (I could be misquoting) or anything that gets your adrenaline pumping to make yourself "fall" for a man that's not your "type." I feel like this: if I have to jump through hoops to make myself attracted to or fall in love with a man, guess what-I don't love him. There's nothing there and I'm not going to turn all kinds of tricks to make myself like him.

That aside. I really enjoyed the book! It was eye-opening. I could see patterns in myself and others as well. Being a writer, understanding behaviors and motivations is important in order to create believable characters. Great job, Dr. Diana!

[Nancy Weil · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dr. Diana knows her stuff. She truly cares about helping people break through their faulty thoughts, bad habits and other blocks to finding the "one." Many of my clients want a relationship, but aren't willing to do the work to get one. I recommend this book to them and I recommend it to you as well. Stop making excuses for why you are alone and start learning how to search and connect with a wonderful partner.

[Mie · Rating 4 out of 5]

It is very practical and if you really try all of these, I am sure you can get a boyfriend within 90 days,,,,but the truth is it is really hard to keep dating three men at the same time. Maybe we can have a casual date but once we are in love and the relationships turn into serious one, I feel not everybody can manage having three guys at the same time. I feel it's a bit insincere. But I am sure this is very useful book.

[Lisa J Shultz · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is well written with good strategies, but I think it can take more than 90 days to find the love of your life. If you drop everything and do all the exercises and date like crazy, 90 days might work, but for the average person, it might be a bit longer. I have recommended the book to many girl friends.

[Samantha · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book worked for me. After the death of a loved one I wasn't sure if I was even ready for a serious relationship yet, but I met (reconnected with an old acquaintance actually) the guy who I'm going to marry while reading this book. It's all about taking care of yourself and how to find someone who is crazy about you and treats you well.

[Holly Bluemlein · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you are single and don't want to be READ THIS BOOK!!! I have read a lot of relationship books and this one is hands down the best one. I recommend it to all of my friends and give it the bulk of credit for the fact that I'm happily married now.

[Marlene Landauer · Rating 5 out of 5]

an amazing book! I learned so much and am finally in a beautiful and loving relationship! Diana Kirschner is a very helpful teacher!

[Azure · Rating 4 out of 5]

Helpful, but much more so because I went to the website and found a Love Mentor to coach me through it.

[Dan Stern · Rating 4 out of 5]

It gave me a way better insight on how to perceive and judge guys, as well as myself! The description of our "deadly dating habits" were brilliant and right on! And it had a really good chapter with advice on how to be in a relationship/marriage which I reread after me and my boyfriend were together for a year or so. So yes! Shortly after reading this I hooked up with my now boyfriend of 4 years! ;) After 6-10 years of being chronically single! Now granted it wasn't just this... at the time I was changing my career and doing the book/course Artist's Way by Julia Cameron and was really growing and developing myself in amazing ways. But I'd been hanging with my boyfriend who was just a friend at the time and I was thinking I might be interested in him but wasn't sure. Then had met another guy I was intensely attracted to and was so confused I needed advice and grabbed this book coz I'd been eyeing it for a while. Well needless to say it worked! I totally recommend it! :) Obviously no guarantees it'll work for you but it's really worth giving it a try! :)

[Jennifer Navta · Rating 5 out of 5]

Go to the Experts I always say when I need information or help. The expert here of course is Dr. Diana Kirschner, clinical psychologist, renowned expert on Men, Love, Dating and Relationships. Her book Love in 90 Days is fantastic, the Bible of finding a man of your dreams for a fulfilling relationship. Yes, finding a good man is work but isn't it worth it to find Love? A big lesson for me is that I must put myself in situations to meet new men regularly as my dream guy will not fall out of the sky.

Whether she's teaching us about our Deadly Dating Patterns ( who knew we had any} or just supporting us to keep our self esteem high during the process, Dr. Diana is the Queen. Her knowledge is unending, her caring spirit is always calming and confirming. She really cares. She helps us learn about how we hold ourselves back, how to keep our goals front and center, and how to spot the great guys quickly. I didn't even know I had so much to learn.

If there is one book to help you on your dating journey Love in 90 Days is it. I highly recommend it.

[Donna Wolfe · Rating 5 out of 5]

I wish I had known about Dr. Diana Kirschner's book "Love in 90 Days" when it was first released 10 years ago. As a single "50 something" professional woman, I was always "too busy" to prioritize finding the love of my life! I always thought it would simply happen for me when the timing was right, but it never did.

Dr. Diana's chapter on Deadly Dating Patterns was a real eye opener for me. I now clearly understand the reasons why I do not have the love I always thought I would have in my life, and the steps I need to follow in order to find my true love!

Thanks to the unwavering support of my Master Love Mentor, I feel more confident and radiant than ever and I'm excited about following Dr. Diana's program to break my self sabotaging patterns that have gotten me nowhere and to fully develop my most loving self. Better late than never!

[Susan K · Rating 5 out of 5]

The book is a cut above most relationship-finding (and keeping) tomes; if the reader meets the author half-way. There is a lot of resistance to change in many of us. Think of this book as working with a personal trainer. Getting an overview of the program; then doing the exercises (not skipping or skimming for the most part unless you already have 6 pack abs). Be honest when you look closely at yourself and your habits, self-esteem, expectations and overall motivations and self-sabotage quirks.
Dr. Kirschner is both a research and practical application devotee. The book/author supports you no matter who you are; and from whence you are starting. There is a lot of depth of content that works IF one does the work.

[Nicole DiCristofaro · Rating 5 out of 5]

As someone who was single at 38 and totally not prepared for how different it would be compared to my 20s, I definitely struggled! This book provides so much insight into what holds many women (and men) back in their love lives. The best part is understanding your Deadly Dating Patterns - I have at least 3 of them! Knowledge is key and this book is a gift I always give or recommend to single friends. Her background as a psychologist and experience working with single and married people is invaluable. She knows her stuff!

[Kate Forest · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a therapist, I can’t recommend this book enough. Dr. Diana has taken the latest research and best therapeutic practices and made them accessible for everyone. The exercises and advice are easy to follow. But more importantly, this book changes your outlook on romantic relationships. It gives a roadmap on how to find the relationship you need and how to avoid the ones that have been harmful.

[Carm · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found Dr. Diana on Facebook earlier this year. I registered for her five day seminar and purchased her book. This led me to join her Advanced Love in 90 Days Program. The things I have learned from her are too many to list. I know now what I was doing wrong in dating and I am confident that my heart mate is around the corner. I would highly recommend this book.

[Olga · Rating 5 out of 5]

I highly recommend the book, it gives you the tools that one needs to move into the dating world with confidence and fun enjoying the process to find a life partner. It also helps to feel much better about yourself, know your deep needs, and don't waste time with dates that don't have the potential to be a real soulmate.

[Anna Glezina · Rating 5 out of 5]

Do NOT read this book if you are constantly and easily offended by everything.
Do read this book if you are looking for a serious relationship and feel like you need to troubleshoot your mind to be more successful.
This book seemed to be obvious to me, but I am in a happy committed relationship. I think many others can benefit from reading it big times.

[Wendy Lyon · Rating 5 out of 5]

If you want to find true love, you need this book! Dr. Diana Kirschner's Love in 90 Days program is brilliant, insightful and highly recommended. Enjoy the wisdom and humor in this book and follow the steps if you want to find your life partner.

[Caroline Bradley · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm not entirely sure what she advocates is practical. I'd love to go on just one date, let alone 3 in a week, but the self-view information is definitely spot on and helpful.

[Angelia Johnson · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a must read if you are single!! This book really teaches you how to let go of the past and make room in your heart and your life to let love in without loosing yourself or going crazy!!

[Susan Csoke · Rating 4 out of 5]

The dating world has exploded, this is the age of abundant Love and Diana has given the reader a fabulous guide and understanding to finding true love. Thankyou Goodreads for this free book!!!!

[Hildy R · Rating 5 out of 5]

While there are many books on dating and finding your true love, Love in 90 Days by Dr. Diana Kirschner, is by far the best of breed. Her skill in diagnosing relationship problems and suggesting solutions is unmatched. Her love mentoring service is outstanding and she has put her many years of counseling into a format that is accessible and usable by women and men alike.

Here is a powerful example of Dr. Diana’s advice. Be careful of allowing yourself to fall into the trap of making your love choices strictly on the basis of your feelings rather that finding out as many facts as possible first. She calls relying solely on your feelings as one of the Deadly Dating Patterns.

Dr. Diana suggests that a way to keep your dating balance is by having a casual, non-sexual relationship with three men at the same time. If you think you cannot have this, then you need this program to tell you how to do it! This is so important because if you initially only have a relationship with one man, you are more likely to make an emotional decision - which may not be in your best interest. You may not be able to recognize the facts hidden by stories you were told, if you so want this man to be “the one.”

Among the many subjects covered in Dr. Diana’s book includes the following:
How to find love mentors.
How to discover your Diamond Self.
How to promote yourself online.
How to evaluate your current and future relationships.
If you follow the Eight Habits of Living Love, you will be well on your way to being the loving person that other people seek out.
The Love in 90 Days program provides outstanding coaching and mentoring, so you can create the balance you need to select a good man for you. The seventh step in the Love in 90 Days program is: "Appreciating a good guy who is crazy about you and willing to grow." If this is what you want in your life, there is no better guide to help you to change the things you can.
While there are many books on dating and finding your true love, Love in 90 Days by Dr. Diana Kirschner, is by far the best of breed. Her skill in diagnosing relationship problems and suggesting solutions is unmatched. Her love mentoring service is outstanding and she has put her many years of counseling into a format that is accessible and usable by women and men alike.

Here is a powerful example of Dr. Diana’s advice. Be careful of allowing yourself to fall into the trap of making your love choices strictly on the basis of your feelings rather that finding out as many facts as possible first. She calls relying solely on your feelings as one of the Deadly Dating Patterns.

Dr. Diana suggests that a way to keep your dating balance is by having a casual, non-sexual relationship with three men at the same time. If you think you cannot have this, then you need this program to tell you how to do it! This is so important because if you initially only have a relationship with one man, you are more likely to make an emotional decision - which may not be in your best interest. You may not be able to recognize the facts hidden by stories you were told, if you so want this man to be “the one.”
Among the many subjects covered in Dr. Diana’s book includes the following:
How to find love mentors.
How to discover your Diamond Self.
How to promote yourself online.
How to evaluate your current and future relationships.
If you follow the Eight Habits of Living Love, you will be well on your way to being the loving person that other people seek out.

The Love in 90 Days program provides outstanding coaching and mentoring, so you can create the balance you need to select a good man for you. The seventh step in the Love in 90 Days program is: "Appreciating a good guy who is crazy about you and willing to grow." If this is what you want in your life, there is no better guide to help you to change the things you can.

[Jennifer L. · Rating 4 out of 5]

I receieved this book from a giveaway on a blog I follow. I was quite excited to have won this.

I'm not the best when it comes to dating or relationships, and being single, never married and no date since 2001 might be a testimony to that fact.

Obviously I haven't had 90 days since receiving this book to try out the things she recommends. In fact, I'm not sure I'm "on the market" yet for a few months, want to get a few things completed in my life first, so it may be a little while before I actually start putting some of these things into practice.

I never thought of marketing myself, which is basically what this book recommends. I am already more aware of who is around me, what I'm wearng when I run just to the store, etc.

This book also dispells the fears of online dating. I did join one major site a few years ago and didn't have any luck, including getting a notice saying that someone had contacted me they had kicked off the site and have no more contact with that man! Wow! What an intro to online dating! So after my month was up I decided to delete my account.

I'm curious to see where I am in a year with my adventure!