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You Got Anything Stronger?: Stories...Now with an Extra Shot of Grace
Remember when we hit it off so well that we decided We’re Going to Need More Wine? Well, this time you and I are going to turn to our friend the bartender and ask, You Got Anything Stronger? I promise to continue to make you laugh, but with this round, the stakes get higher as the conversation goes deeper.
So. Where were we?
Right, you and I left off in October 2017, when my first book came out. The weeks before were filled with dreams of loss. Pets dying. My husband leaving me. Babies not being born. My therapist told me it was my soul preparing for my true self to emerge after letting go of my grief. I had finally spoken openly about my fertility journey. I was having second thoughts—in fact, so many thoughts they were organizing to go on strike. But I knew I had to be honest because I didn’t want other women going through IVF to feel as alone as I did. I had suffered in isolation, having so many miscarriages that I could not give an exact number. Strangers shared their own journeys and heartbreak with me. I had led with the truth, and it opened the door to compassion.
When I released We’re Going to Need More Wine, the response was so great people asked when I would do a sequel. The New York Times even ran a headline reading “We’re Going to Need More Gabrielle Union.” Frankly, after being so open and honest in my writing, I wasn’t sure there was more of me I was ready to share. But life happens with all its plot twists. And new stories demand to be told. This time, I need to be more vulnerable—not so much for me, but anyone who feels alone in what they’re going through.
A lot has changed in four years—I became a mom and I’m raising two amazing girls. My husband retired. My career has expanded so that I have the opportunity to lift up other voices that need to be heard. But the world has also shown us that we have a lot we still have to fight for—as women, as black women, as mothers, as aging women, as human beings, as friends. In You Got Anything Stronger?, I show you how this ever-changing life presents challenges, even as it gives me moments of pure joy. I take you on a girl’s night at Chateau Marmont, and I also talk to Isis, my character from Bring It On. For the first time, I truly open up about my surrogacy journey and the birth of Kaavia James Union Wade. And I take on racist institutions and practices in the entertainment industry, asking for equality and real accountability.
You Got Anything Stronger? is me at my most vulnerable. I have recently found true strength in that vulnerability, and I want to share that power with you here, through this book.
So. Where were we?
Right, you and I left off in October 2017, when my first book came out. The weeks before were filled with dreams of loss. Pets dying. My husband leaving me. Babies not being born. My therapist told me it was my soul preparing for my true self to emerge after letting go of my grief. I had finally spoken openly about my fertility journey. I was having second thoughts—in fact, so many thoughts they were organizing to go on strike. But I knew I had to be honest because I didn’t want other women going through IVF to feel as alone as I did. I had suffered in isolation, having so many miscarriages that I could not give an exact number. Strangers shared their own journeys and heartbreak with me. I had led with the truth, and it opened the door to compassion.
When I released We’re Going to Need More Wine, the response was so great people asked when I would do a sequel. The New York Times even ran a headline reading “We’re Going to Need More Gabrielle Union.” Frankly, after being so open and honest in my writing, I wasn’t sure there was more of me I was ready to share. But life happens with all its plot twists. And new stories demand to be told. This time, I need to be more vulnerable—not so much for me, but anyone who feels alone in what they’re going through.
A lot has changed in four years—I became a mom and I’m raising two amazing girls. My husband retired. My career has expanded so that I have the opportunity to lift up other voices that need to be heard. But the world has also shown us that we have a lot we still have to fight for—as women, as black women, as mothers, as aging women, as human beings, as friends. In You Got Anything Stronger?, I show you how this ever-changing life presents challenges, even as it gives me moments of pure joy. I take you on a girl’s night at Chateau Marmont, and I also talk to Isis, my character from Bring It On. For the first time, I truly open up about my surrogacy journey and the birth of Kaavia James Union Wade. And I take on racist institutions and practices in the entertainment industry, asking for equality and real accountability.
You Got Anything Stronger? is me at my most vulnerable. I have recently found true strength in that vulnerability, and I want to share that power with you here, through this book.
Audio CD
First published September 14, 2021
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About the author
Gabrielle Union
14 books784 followersGabrielle Monique Union-Wade (born October 29, 1972) is an American actress, activist, and author. She began her career in the 1990s, appearing on television sitcoms, before landing supporting roles in teenage comedic films She's All That and 10 Things I Hate About You (1999).
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 1,191 reviews
September 25, 2021
This follow-up memoir to We're Going to Need More Wine reminded me of just how much I adore Gabrielle Union. (I do recommend reading that one first if you haven’t already, though it’s not required.) This book covers very emotional and personal topics such as: her daughter’s birth via surrogacy, her stepdaughter’s coming out as transgender, suicidal ideation, and racism in it’s unfortunate myriad of forms. But this book isn’t all heavy - it also features a dance off with Bruno Mars, strip clubs, and a limoncello Thanksgiving. So come for the ex-lax story but stay for the needed racial justice discussion.
January 13, 2022
Gabrielle Union was able to give me another great group of short stories. As it is stated in the summary, this book picks up right where she left off in 2017 with a host of different experiences that Union has had in the past few years. She addresses different topics like having a surrogate, racism experiences abroad, aging as a Black woman, being a Black actress in Hollywood, and more. This year I want to dive a little more into memoirs and I'm happy that this is how I started that journey.
You Got Anything Stronger is written in the same tone and with the same passion as her first book. Readers are given insight to Union's thought process on a variety of topics. Some of the things that she discussed were continuations from her first novel while others were new topics. I was most interested in her essays that reflected on her and Dwayne educating themselves about Zaya's identity as well as her reflection on the role she played in Bring It On. Raising a child that identifies as LGBTQIA+ in the Black community is complicated and sometimes disheartening. Even without having read this memoir, I was happy to see (via social media & various articles) the safe space that they were committed to providing Zaya. Union was adamant that she and Dwayne still have a lot to learn and are not afraid to be corrected in their learning process. To know that they are so invested in learning so much while having to protect their child from so much transphobia is heartbreaking.
Union has always had an interesting perspective when it comes to being an actress. Prior to reading her first book I, like so many others, often looked at Union as the "mean" girl because those were the roles she was always cast to play. While she addresses this in the first book, I'm glad that she dived deeper in this second book and really explored what it meant for her to play Isis on Bring It On. It's no denying that the movie is a cult classic; however, Union really explores the manner in which the writers treated members of the Clovers versus the Toros. From not getting last names to the way the characters were forced to deal with their cheers being stolen, it was clear the characters were developed differently. Honestly, it made me look at the movie from a different lens. It's easy to get caught up in the enjoyment of a film without thinking about it's implications.
Overall, this was another great memoir by Union and I'm looking forward to seeing what else she does in the future. She writes with such humor and sincerity that readers can't help but to connect to her many stories and lessons.
You Got Anything Stronger is written in the same tone and with the same passion as her first book. Readers are given insight to Union's thought process on a variety of topics. Some of the things that she discussed were continuations from her first novel while others were new topics. I was most interested in her essays that reflected on her and Dwayne educating themselves about Zaya's identity as well as her reflection on the role she played in Bring It On. Raising a child that identifies as LGBTQIA+ in the Black community is complicated and sometimes disheartening. Even without having read this memoir, I was happy to see (via social media & various articles) the safe space that they were committed to providing Zaya. Union was adamant that she and Dwayne still have a lot to learn and are not afraid to be corrected in their learning process. To know that they are so invested in learning so much while having to protect their child from so much transphobia is heartbreaking.
Union has always had an interesting perspective when it comes to being an actress. Prior to reading her first book I, like so many others, often looked at Union as the "mean" girl because those were the roles she was always cast to play. While she addresses this in the first book, I'm glad that she dived deeper in this second book and really explored what it meant for her to play Isis on Bring It On. It's no denying that the movie is a cult classic; however, Union really explores the manner in which the writers treated members of the Clovers versus the Toros. From not getting last names to the way the characters were forced to deal with their cheers being stolen, it was clear the characters were developed differently. Honestly, it made me look at the movie from a different lens. It's easy to get caught up in the enjoyment of a film without thinking about it's implications.
Overall, this was another great memoir by Union and I'm looking forward to seeing what else she does in the future. She writes with such humor and sincerity that readers can't help but to connect to her many stories and lessons.
September 17, 2021
Okay Gabrielle! I see you!!
I really love this writing life for Ms. Union! She is gliding into a realm that so many other actors and actresses have capitalized off of, but she’s ACTUALLY good at it!
She’s giving you story, she’s giving you internal thought process, she’s giving you lessons learned and I’m here for all of it!
Her viewpoints and recollections are strong and she dragged me in with how pointed, reflective and snappy each story was. I appreciate that.
I felt like she threw her arm around my shoulder and said, “Girl, let me tell you about this fame ish, it ain’t all it’s cracked up to be.. but we’re here, doing what we can, supporting our Black and queer children, and some fun and some stressful things have happened along the way…”
I love how much she values what time has taught her and how much effort she puts into her own growth, self-healing, marriage and more. I love how she eviscerates the media for the double standards, sexism, ageism and more that they’ve thrown on women in particular. Seeing as how she’s married a younger man, and has had a baby through surrogacy, she’s well versed in the brutality of standard media and social media and she shares those stories and how she’s managed to move through them, living the life she’s worked very hard for.
I’m so proud of her for speaking her truths on the importance of building and displaying unity between Black entertainers, creatives, professionals as a means of throwing a wrench in the white supremacy that dominates Hollywood and seeks to extrapolate talent from Black folks while leaving the person behind, unrecognized and underpaid.
I loved that she talked about her role as Isis in Bring It On and what that meant to people and the relevance as seen in our current world of blackfishing, stolen Tik Tok dances/trends, and cultural appropriation. She went off in that last story titled, Standards and Practices: A Tragedy in Three Acts! It’s thee story to read in this series. Powerful! Studied!
I mean this book feels like an obvious money making venture, but she gives up the goods — sharing stories about all night dance battles with Bruno Mars & Serena Williams, as well as having to take a super duper dookie as a stripper grinds on you in Magic City, and the sisterhood that can be found in the most unique of places.
I fully enjoyed this follow up series of stories. I feel like she’s opened up some avenues to research and discuss in the future should she wish to write another book. Petty me wishes she got up in the ass cracked of Terry Crews!!! And honestly, she did kinda did without naming names, she talked about the importance of supporting each other, but dude, I wanted more! All in all, it was a good read.
I really love this writing life for Ms. Union! She is gliding into a realm that so many other actors and actresses have capitalized off of, but she’s ACTUALLY good at it!
She’s giving you story, she’s giving you internal thought process, she’s giving you lessons learned and I’m here for all of it!
Her viewpoints and recollections are strong and she dragged me in with how pointed, reflective and snappy each story was. I appreciate that.
I felt like she threw her arm around my shoulder and said, “Girl, let me tell you about this fame ish, it ain’t all it’s cracked up to be.. but we’re here, doing what we can, supporting our Black and queer children, and some fun and some stressful things have happened along the way…”
I love how much she values what time has taught her and how much effort she puts into her own growth, self-healing, marriage and more. I love how she eviscerates the media for the double standards, sexism, ageism and more that they’ve thrown on women in particular. Seeing as how she’s married a younger man, and has had a baby through surrogacy, she’s well versed in the brutality of standard media and social media and she shares those stories and how she’s managed to move through them, living the life she’s worked very hard for.
I’m so proud of her for speaking her truths on the importance of building and displaying unity between Black entertainers, creatives, professionals as a means of throwing a wrench in the white supremacy that dominates Hollywood and seeks to extrapolate talent from Black folks while leaving the person behind, unrecognized and underpaid.
I loved that she talked about her role as Isis in Bring It On and what that meant to people and the relevance as seen in our current world of blackfishing, stolen Tik Tok dances/trends, and cultural appropriation. She went off in that last story titled, Standards and Practices: A Tragedy in Three Acts! It’s thee story to read in this series. Powerful! Studied!
I mean this book feels like an obvious money making venture, but she gives up the goods — sharing stories about all night dance battles with Bruno Mars & Serena Williams, as well as having to take a super duper dookie as a stripper grinds on you in Magic City, and the sisterhood that can be found in the most unique of places.
I fully enjoyed this follow up series of stories. I feel like she’s opened up some avenues to research and discuss in the future should she wish to write another book. Petty me wishes she got up in the ass cracked of Terry Crews!!! And honestly, she did kinda did without naming names, she talked about the importance of supporting each other, but dude, I wanted more! All in all, it was a good read.
October 13, 2021
I really enjoyed Gabrielle Union’s second book You Got Anything Stronger? in which she discusses her experience as a wife, mom, and actress, in addition to her infertility struggle and stories of family and friends.
I listened to the audiobook, which she narrates and I enjoyed the solid dose of humor throughout the book despite several heavier topics. It was a good balance and the stories she shared felt authentic, like a friend not afraid to share their vulnerability.
I listened to the audiobook, which she narrates and I enjoyed the solid dose of humor throughout the book despite several heavier topics. It was a good balance and the stories she shared felt authentic, like a friend not afraid to share their vulnerability.
May 27, 2023
Overall, I liked this book. I appreciated Gabrielle Union’s continued vulnerability about mental health, race, and topics such as her struggle with infertility and surrogacy. In particular I felt moved by her acceptance and celebration of her transgender daughter, Zaya. There were some essays I found a bit meandering or lacking in their concision compared to her first essay collection
We’re Going to Need More Wine
. Still, a collection I’d recommend to fans of Union.
I’m trying to boost my quality nonfiction reads this year as most of my favorites of 2023 have been fiction, so if anyone has any recommendations please let me know!
I’m trying to boost my quality nonfiction reads this year as most of my favorites of 2023 have been fiction, so if anyone has any recommendations please let me know!
November 20, 2022
Celebrity memoir has long been a genre that I tend to gravitate to as the year winds down. Whether it’s finishing a reading challenge, enjoying time with family, or dealing with the grind of everyday life, my mind craves light reading. I know going in that this genre is hit or miss. Many times unless the writer has a background in literature or writing, these books are not going to win awards for literary prowess; however, it allows me to learn about the person behind the persona. I read Gabrielle Union’s first book four years ago and was awed by its depth, giving me a new appreciate of her. I have been following Union’s career since she starred in Bring it On over twenty years ago so I was thrilled to find out that she had penned a second book. Like her first one, Union did not disappoint.
You Got Anything Stronger starts by thanking readers for participating in the first book- reading , coming out on the book tour, following on social media. Although Union’s life has been busy for ver the last few years, she felt that she owed it to readers to write a second one. This book is not for readers who just want lite reading although it reads as such. Union is now the mother to four year old Kaavia James Union-Wade. Kaavia arrived via surrogacy four years ago, giving Union the title of mother. In describing Kaavia’s story, she tackles issues as infertility from all angles as well as the ever present privilege of raising a black girl in the 21st century. Just discussing infertility alone would make this book a worthy read. Infertility is still a taboo topic in many facets of society so I laud Union about sharing her story and speaking out because perhaps some reading this have been going through similar issues in their own life, hopefully pushing people of all backgrounds down a new life path that suits them.
Besides infertility, Union discusses working motherhood. It is still an issue although we are more than 20 years into the 2st century. Women are still faced with the choice of working or staying home with their children and regardless are expected to run their home full time. Granted, the Union-Wade household has means that most of us can only dream of; however, it is still the woman who has to cook, make all the doctors appointments, schedule the kids’ activities and be present at school events. Other than the obvious income disparity, the fact that in her home, she is still expected to do the bulk of the maintenance, not much is different from any home where a working mother resides. This section humanizes Union to me and makes this book read like a rap session.
I appreciated her chapters on LGTBQ rights and racism. I may not see eye to eye on everything but I felt more informed from reading about Union’s life journey, as well as that of her stepdaughter Zaya. Besides the hot button issues, Union intersperses life’s vignettes that are designed to make one laugh. Her thanksgiving celebration at her father’s home had me in stitches. Her and her college roommate telling off a boyfriend gone wrong, also a funny moment albeit not the mood when it took place. Inserting these lighter moments along side talks on women’s aging both physically and in the workplace as well as the aforementioned issues made for a well rounded, quality reading.
Gabrielle Union recently appeared on the cover of the Time 100 issue. She has her own brand of hair products for those with textured hair as well as her own mother friendly production company. More importantly after a long journey, she now holds title of mother as well as stepmother as she navigates bringing black girls and boys toward adulthood in the 21st century. With a powerhouse mother, not to mention father, I look forward to seeing how daughters Kaavia James and Zaya turn out. With a mother like Gabrielle to guide them, I have a feeling that they have bright futures.
🌟 4 stars 🌟
You Got Anything Stronger starts by thanking readers for participating in the first book- reading , coming out on the book tour, following on social media. Although Union’s life has been busy for ver the last few years, she felt that she owed it to readers to write a second one. This book is not for readers who just want lite reading although it reads as such. Union is now the mother to four year old Kaavia James Union-Wade. Kaavia arrived via surrogacy four years ago, giving Union the title of mother. In describing Kaavia’s story, she tackles issues as infertility from all angles as well as the ever present privilege of raising a black girl in the 21st century. Just discussing infertility alone would make this book a worthy read. Infertility is still a taboo topic in many facets of society so I laud Union about sharing her story and speaking out because perhaps some reading this have been going through similar issues in their own life, hopefully pushing people of all backgrounds down a new life path that suits them.
Besides infertility, Union discusses working motherhood. It is still an issue although we are more than 20 years into the 2st century. Women are still faced with the choice of working or staying home with their children and regardless are expected to run their home full time. Granted, the Union-Wade household has means that most of us can only dream of; however, it is still the woman who has to cook, make all the doctors appointments, schedule the kids’ activities and be present at school events. Other than the obvious income disparity, the fact that in her home, she is still expected to do the bulk of the maintenance, not much is different from any home where a working mother resides. This section humanizes Union to me and makes this book read like a rap session.
I appreciated her chapters on LGTBQ rights and racism. I may not see eye to eye on everything but I felt more informed from reading about Union’s life journey, as well as that of her stepdaughter Zaya. Besides the hot button issues, Union intersperses life’s vignettes that are designed to make one laugh. Her thanksgiving celebration at her father’s home had me in stitches. Her and her college roommate telling off a boyfriend gone wrong, also a funny moment albeit not the mood when it took place. Inserting these lighter moments along side talks on women’s aging both physically and in the workplace as well as the aforementioned issues made for a well rounded, quality reading.
Gabrielle Union recently appeared on the cover of the Time 100 issue. She has her own brand of hair products for those with textured hair as well as her own mother friendly production company. More importantly after a long journey, she now holds title of mother as well as stepmother as she navigates bringing black girls and boys toward adulthood in the 21st century. With a powerhouse mother, not to mention father, I look forward to seeing how daughters Kaavia James and Zaya turn out. With a mother like Gabrielle to guide them, I have a feeling that they have bright futures.
🌟 4 stars 🌟
February 3, 2022
And just like that I am even more in love with this woman. She really went there, and gave us her vulnerability which for me, was a real gift. My heart has been deeply touched by not just her truth, but truth so many Black women, and people of color can identify with. She said so many poignant things, and I wish I could share them all, but one quote that will be my motto is— “Expand your dream to include others.” As someone that tries to do this in everything I do personally, and professionally, it meant so much to hear her say this too. There is room for us all, and we’re stronger together.
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
February 19, 2022
I went back and forth while listening to this audiobook.
Going in, I knew that Gabrielle Union was going to write about her surrogacy journey. That's mostly why I picked this up. A few times a year I pick up something nonfiction, partly just to prove that I can, when the vast majority of what I read is sci-fi/fantasy. So when I read the description about her pursuing parenthood through surrogacy, I thought, "I can relate to that." I adopted and didn't really have surrogacy as an option, but I could still relate.
I thought I had a healthy relationship with Gabrielle Union because I know exactly who she is, and have enjoyed some of her roles, but I'm not a true fanatic. I have known how pretty she was for decades. I recognized her in Bring it On, 7th Heaven, Meet Dave, and a few other roles. Generally, I think of myself as liking her, but only in an arm's length sort of way.
But hearing her actual thoughts and lifestyle gave me whiplash.
Her description of surrogacy was a little confusing. She used a lot of sports metaphors to explain how she felt like she was failing as a woman by not getting pregnant. I couldn't relate to that personally, but I understood what she meant. Then, I was baffled by her description of how unprepared she was for the actual baby. She didn't have a nursery ready when she was hiring a nanny, and the nanny judged her for it. She hired a woman to be her surrogate, and she knew when the expected due date was, but it turned out she didn't know how long labor lasts for when she got the call about the surrogate giving birth. Union spent a lot of time talking about how she trained herself to be perfect and proper, living up to expectations to try to combat racism and be accepted as an acceptable black person. But I couldn't understand how someone who spent so much time overpreparing to be excellent didn't prepare more for the baby she had wanted so badly. I had my nursery ready for almost a full two years before I finally got a baby to put in it.
I would nod along as Union talked about her experience as a black actress in Hollywood, and how she wished she had done more for black rights in her role in Bring it On. She does a great job pointing out cultural appropriation, microaggression, and the higher standards black students and actors face to try to earn any amount of human recognition. I am proud of her and want to amplify her voice as a white ally. Those parts of the book I want my son to read, so he can internalize their lessons for what his life is going to be like as a person of color.
But then she spoke so casually about how she and her friends regularly go to a strip club. She does this despite the fact she is a married woman with kids. ... The imagery seems problematic to me for reasons that I have difficulty putting into words. She could defend her right to her sexuality, I suppose. But I think any kind of strip club, male or female, is exploitative for the strippers and reduces human beings into a commodity. It tries to normalize sex work, while maintaining the illusion that the people paying strippers for their bodies aren't *really* cheating on their spouses.
I know that Union and her athlete husband must not have an open marriage, because she briefly alluded to how he had conceived a child with another woman while they were married. This factoid hit me like a ton of bricks, leaving me slack-jawed about why she was still married to this guy. She glossed over the enormity of this infraction by saying something along the lines that they were "in a bad place in their marriage."
The story about her sexual assault won me back. I am completely supportive of a crime victim feeling comfortable talking about the crime. Sexual assault is a seriously underreported crime, and we need more victims to be willing to come forward. We need to normalize victims talking about it and taking back their power.
Then, Union lost me again by casually talking about the fact her husband used to be sober, and he tried to limit her alcohol consumption because he was worried about her. She described how she and her friends laughed off his concerns and bought more alcohol, disparaging his worries. ... This is such a problematic story. At a minimum, it shows that she is disrespectful of her husband actually being a good husband. If he is worried you can't handle your alcohol consumption, and he's trying to protect you, that is a good thing. I can't understand why you're still married to a guy who cheated on you, but in this regard, I'm on his side. Maybe he's trying to keep you from making a fool of yourself. Maybe he recognizes you really have a substance-abuse problem. Or maybe he's overreacting when you don't actually have an addiction, but you should still appreciate the fact he's trying to help you.
Then, Union astounded me by describing how supportive she was of her queer step-child who alternated from calling herself a gay male, to nonbinary, to a straight trans-girl. Union was a remarkably good LGBTQ+ ally throughout most of her life, despite being a cishet woman herself. My husband and I are gay, and we still struggle with remembering pronouns for nonbinary people. We have agreed that we are going to support our son no matter what his orientation or gender identity turn out to be, but I'm impressed that a straight parent has already displayed this much open-mindedness.
I'm mostly pleased that I got this, but I'm not sure whether I could be friends with Union in real life. I feel like I would like her as a person, but her attitudes about drinking and strip clubs would make it impossible for us to get along in any casual setting. I would like to imagine that I would thank her for being a queer ally, and then she would thank me for being a black ally, and all would be well. But, in real life, I think what would happen would be that we would set up a play date with our toddlers, and then she would offer me an alcoholic drink, and after I turned it down, she would mock me for being sober, and then the friendship would sour.
Going in, I knew that Gabrielle Union was going to write about her surrogacy journey. That's mostly why I picked this up. A few times a year I pick up something nonfiction, partly just to prove that I can, when the vast majority of what I read is sci-fi/fantasy. So when I read the description about her pursuing parenthood through surrogacy, I thought, "I can relate to that." I adopted and didn't really have surrogacy as an option, but I could still relate.
I thought I had a healthy relationship with Gabrielle Union because I know exactly who she is, and have enjoyed some of her roles, but I'm not a true fanatic. I have known how pretty she was for decades. I recognized her in Bring it On, 7th Heaven, Meet Dave, and a few other roles. Generally, I think of myself as liking her, but only in an arm's length sort of way.
But hearing her actual thoughts and lifestyle gave me whiplash.
Her description of surrogacy was a little confusing. She used a lot of sports metaphors to explain how she felt like she was failing as a woman by not getting pregnant. I couldn't relate to that personally, but I understood what she meant. Then, I was baffled by her description of how unprepared she was for the actual baby. She didn't have a nursery ready when she was hiring a nanny, and the nanny judged her for it. She hired a woman to be her surrogate, and she knew when the expected due date was, but it turned out she didn't know how long labor lasts for when she got the call about the surrogate giving birth. Union spent a lot of time talking about how she trained herself to be perfect and proper, living up to expectations to try to combat racism and be accepted as an acceptable black person. But I couldn't understand how someone who spent so much time overpreparing to be excellent didn't prepare more for the baby she had wanted so badly. I had my nursery ready for almost a full two years before I finally got a baby to put in it.
I would nod along as Union talked about her experience as a black actress in Hollywood, and how she wished she had done more for black rights in her role in Bring it On. She does a great job pointing out cultural appropriation, microaggression, and the higher standards black students and actors face to try to earn any amount of human recognition. I am proud of her and want to amplify her voice as a white ally. Those parts of the book I want my son to read, so he can internalize their lessons for what his life is going to be like as a person of color.
But then she spoke so casually about how she and her friends regularly go to a strip club. She does this despite the fact she is a married woman with kids. ... The imagery seems problematic to me for reasons that I have difficulty putting into words. She could defend her right to her sexuality, I suppose. But I think any kind of strip club, male or female, is exploitative for the strippers and reduces human beings into a commodity. It tries to normalize sex work, while maintaining the illusion that the people paying strippers for their bodies aren't *really* cheating on their spouses.
I know that Union and her athlete husband must not have an open marriage, because she briefly alluded to how he had conceived a child with another woman while they were married. This factoid hit me like a ton of bricks, leaving me slack-jawed about why she was still married to this guy. She glossed over the enormity of this infraction by saying something along the lines that they were "in a bad place in their marriage."
The story about her sexual assault won me back. I am completely supportive of a crime victim feeling comfortable talking about the crime. Sexual assault is a seriously underreported crime, and we need more victims to be willing to come forward. We need to normalize victims talking about it and taking back their power.
Then, Union lost me again by casually talking about the fact her husband used to be sober, and he tried to limit her alcohol consumption because he was worried about her. She described how she and her friends laughed off his concerns and bought more alcohol, disparaging his worries. ... This is such a problematic story. At a minimum, it shows that she is disrespectful of her husband actually being a good husband. If he is worried you can't handle your alcohol consumption, and he's trying to protect you, that is a good thing. I can't understand why you're still married to a guy who cheated on you, but in this regard, I'm on his side. Maybe he's trying to keep you from making a fool of yourself. Maybe he recognizes you really have a substance-abuse problem. Or maybe he's overreacting when you don't actually have an addiction, but you should still appreciate the fact he's trying to help you.
Then, Union astounded me by describing how supportive she was of her queer step-child who alternated from calling herself a gay male, to nonbinary, to a straight trans-girl. Union was a remarkably good LGBTQ+ ally throughout most of her life, despite being a cishet woman herself. My husband and I are gay, and we still struggle with remembering pronouns for nonbinary people. We have agreed that we are going to support our son no matter what his orientation or gender identity turn out to be, but I'm impressed that a straight parent has already displayed this much open-mindedness.
I'm mostly pleased that I got this, but I'm not sure whether I could be friends with Union in real life. I feel like I would like her as a person, but her attitudes about drinking and strip clubs would make it impossible for us to get along in any casual setting. I would like to imagine that I would thank her for being a queer ally, and then she would thank me for being a black ally, and all would be well. But, in real life, I think what would happen would be that we would set up a play date with our toddlers, and then she would offer me an alcoholic drink, and after I turned it down, she would mock me for being sober, and then the friendship would sour.
September 16, 2021
Her previous book was better IMO
October 18, 2021
Really great follow-up to Union's We're Going to Need More Wine. The only reason why I gave this 4 stars is that towards the end the book seems to ramble a bit. The last memoir had Union going through her life chronologically and this one jumps back and forth a few times that I had to double-check what the time period she was in when discussing certain things. I have to say though that this book made me laugh (the Janet Jackson chapter is fantastic) and cry (her discussing her multiple miscarriages and the aftermath of being raped). And I loved Union's thoughts on her and her husband's marriage and how the she that she is now would not be with the him he was back in the day.
"You Got Anything Stronger?" is a follow up to Union's last memoir. We get right into the thick of things. It seems as if Union reads the comments on articles bless her cause she tackles a lot of things head-on in this one. She talks about her relationship with Wade before they married, him having another child while they were not together, and her still choosing to marry him. We get into how hard it was for her to keep doing injections as she tried to get pregnant and how many miscarriages she had. And then she let's us into her medical diagnosis and what finally led them to choose surrogacy for themselves. The book goes back and forth to earlier time periods in Union's life and recounts really hilarious things at times as well as scary things (her talking about Croatia has that place on a never go there list for me) and her thoughts on being a Black woman living in America.
I thought that this was a very open memoir and I loved that. I often say that memoirs that don't tell 100 percent of the "truth" or story are lacking. Union lets us see her and her marriage, warts and all.
I also loved her insights into raising her daughter and her stepchildren.
I thought at times though that the back and forth in timelines took me out of the book a bit. And some chapters that were fun to read about didn't really do a lot for me as a reader. The one about the Ex-lax was really funny, but didn't seem to fit the book. I don't know. It felt like a story you would tell on The Tonight Show.
"You Got Anything Stronger?" is a follow up to Union's last memoir. We get right into the thick of things. It seems as if Union reads the comments on articles bless her cause she tackles a lot of things head-on in this one. She talks about her relationship with Wade before they married, him having another child while they were not together, and her still choosing to marry him. We get into how hard it was for her to keep doing injections as she tried to get pregnant and how many miscarriages she had. And then she let's us into her medical diagnosis and what finally led them to choose surrogacy for themselves. The book goes back and forth to earlier time periods in Union's life and recounts really hilarious things at times as well as scary things (her talking about Croatia has that place on a never go there list for me) and her thoughts on being a Black woman living in America.
I thought that this was a very open memoir and I loved that. I often say that memoirs that don't tell 100 percent of the "truth" or story are lacking. Union lets us see her and her marriage, warts and all.
I also loved her insights into raising her daughter and her stepchildren.
I thought at times though that the back and forth in timelines took me out of the book a bit. And some chapters that were fun to read about didn't really do a lot for me as a reader. The one about the Ex-lax was really funny, but didn't seem to fit the book. I don't know. It felt like a story you would tell on The Tonight Show.
November 20, 2021
I was very underwhelmed on this one. Lots of people raved about it but for me it was standard celeb tell all in essays. The hype maybe hurt me here. I didn’t feel connected to her as a person or storyteller. A few essays stood out as strong, but a lot felt very corny and basic in her opinions about what happened etc. The book was just lacking generally for me.
July 31, 2022
Gabrielle Union does not disappoint!
I loved her first book We're Going to Need More Wine and I loved this one just as much. You Got Anything Stronger picks up right where her last book left off and carries us through the early days of the pandemic. Gabrielle (or Nickie as her friends and family call her ) is once again a completely open book. Nothing is off limits including her feelings about her now husband Dwayne Wade having a child behind her back while she was struggling with infertility. I love Gabrielle and while I respect her choices...ladies please don't stay with a man who puts your life in danger by having unprotected sex with other people.
Gabrielle Union also discusses how she and her husband have handled having a transgender daughter. She is open about how they had to do research and really focus on learning the best ways to advocate for her and protect her from the trash of the internet. She shares just how much the trauma from her rape at 19 years old continues effect her in unexpected ways. We also get to meet her much awaited daughter Kaavia and how she needed to get over her own preconceived notions of what motherhood is.
I will read and Gabrielle Union writes, just as I have seen (at least 1 episode) everything she has ever acted in. I'm a Gabrielle Union stan. While you don't need to have read the first book to read this one, it's a much richer experience if you have.
All the stars!
Read this book!
I loved her first book We're Going to Need More Wine and I loved this one just as much. You Got Anything Stronger picks up right where her last book left off and carries us through the early days of the pandemic. Gabrielle (or Nickie as her friends and family call her ) is once again a completely open book. Nothing is off limits including her feelings about her now husband Dwayne Wade having a child behind her back while she was struggling with infertility. I love Gabrielle and while I respect her choices...ladies please don't stay with a man who puts your life in danger by having unprotected sex with other people.
Gabrielle Union also discusses how she and her husband have handled having a transgender daughter. She is open about how they had to do research and really focus on learning the best ways to advocate for her and protect her from the trash of the internet. She shares just how much the trauma from her rape at 19 years old continues effect her in unexpected ways. We also get to meet her much awaited daughter Kaavia and how she needed to get over her own preconceived notions of what motherhood is.
I will read and Gabrielle Union writes, just as I have seen (at least 1 episode) everything she has ever acted in. I'm a Gabrielle Union stan. While you don't need to have read the first book to read this one, it's a much richer experience if you have.
All the stars!
Read this book!
August 16, 2022
2021 Fall Bingo (#FallInLoveBingo🍂): New Release
I love Gabrielle Union so much. Read via audio (narrated by the author).
Disclaimer: I received a free audiobook from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
I love Gabrielle Union so much. Read via audio (narrated by the author).
Disclaimer: I received a free audiobook from the publisher in exchange for an honest review.
March 16, 2022
Couldn’t imagine what more GU had to share but this sophomore book was very good!!!!
December 27, 2021
⭐⭐⭐⭐ 1/2 Stars
I enjoyed Gabrielle's story telling style....basically each chapter was an antidote with a relevant story attached. The book gave us something to think about, laugh with and cry to cleanse if needed...Gabrielle was fantastic on narration duty. Really a good read.
I enjoyed Gabrielle's story telling style....basically each chapter was an antidote with a relevant story attached. The book gave us something to think about, laugh with and cry to cleanse if needed...Gabrielle was fantastic on narration duty. Really a good read.
November 11, 2021
This collection of essays picks up right where Gabrielle Union’s first book, [We’re Going to Need More Wine] left off. The final entry in that told the sad story of her many miscarriages. This starts with a much happier chain of events: the diagnosis of why she can’t carry a pregnancy to term (it’s not just because she’s over 40), and the surrogate birth of her daughter.
This collection is a little more vehement. Not only is Gabrielle strongly invested in what the future will hold for her new baby growing up as a Black girl, she’s also stepped more firmly into parenting and advocating for Dwyane Wade’s kids, especially Zaya, who came out as trans between the previous book and this one.
These essays express every emotion, and let readers see Gabrielle’s constant balancing of strength and vulnerability, despair and hope, anger and activism. She writes powerfully and passionately. I enjoyed this book as much as the first, and am looking forward to whatever she writes next.
This collection is a little more vehement. Not only is Gabrielle strongly invested in what the future will hold for her new baby growing up as a Black girl, she’s also stepped more firmly into parenting and advocating for Dwyane Wade’s kids, especially Zaya, who came out as trans between the previous book and this one.
These essays express every emotion, and let readers see Gabrielle’s constant balancing of strength and vulnerability, despair and hope, anger and activism. She writes powerfully and passionately. I enjoyed this book as much as the first, and am looking forward to whatever she writes next.
September 15, 2021
To say I've been looking forward to this newest essay collection by Gabrielle Union would be a gross understatement! Her last book, We're going to need more wine is one of my favorite celebrity memoirs and this was another incredibly moving, eloquent, compassionate and vulnerable discussion of her life.
Union touches on a variety of topics including mental health, aging, infertility, surrogacy, therapy, rape, being Black in America, raising a trans child, suicidal ideation, work-life balance and the extra burden working mothers face. Along with the heavy there are also some amazing light-hearted and hilarious stories about a dance battle with Bruno Mars, having explosive bowel movements at a strip club and inside stories into creating Bring it on.
This book is amazing on audio read by the author and I felt incredibly privileged to have listened to Gabrielle Union discuss such personal and relatable stories. HIGHLY recommended, especially paired with a large glass of wine!
Union touches on a variety of topics including mental health, aging, infertility, surrogacy, therapy, rape, being Black in America, raising a trans child, suicidal ideation, work-life balance and the extra burden working mothers face. Along with the heavy there are also some amazing light-hearted and hilarious stories about a dance battle with Bruno Mars, having explosive bowel movements at a strip club and inside stories into creating Bring it on.
This book is amazing on audio read by the author and I felt incredibly privileged to have listened to Gabrielle Union discuss such personal and relatable stories. HIGHLY recommended, especially paired with a large glass of wine!
September 28, 2021
This was a humorous read full of contradictions, dramatics , fake deep , and a sly inside look @ the Wade/Union dysfunction. I feel like Gabrielle and Jada pinkette should link up because they're both low key alcoholics ( their words not mine) , revolved around delusion, standing on agreement in long suffering marriages they refuse to let go of .
Gabrielle is sooo stubborn & doing her best to change her mean girl attitude but you can't change something that's embedded in you . In this book she comes off sooo bitter & resentful because she's not the mother of this dysfunctional man's children; especially in regards to the text Zaire supposedly sent ....
She highlighted Dwayne's mean behavior then tried to cover it up like he really cares about her .... clearly Gabrielle is insecure & afraid to fail so that's why she holds onto this faux happy United front .
I feel she definitely emasculated Dwayne she gets to call his outside child a break baby & he says nothing about it (smh ... I feel if you can boldly disrespect a child without cause you deserve whatever hardships that are COMING your way )
She talks about colorism coming from others but she didn't Explain why she chose a WW surrogate so she's feeding into colorism too .... especially mentioning her White counterparts CONSTANTLY like she did in the last book ( ATP I believe she wish she was white )
especially when she created a role specifically for a yt woman but not a black woman .... she confuses me I can't even take her serious ......
it's so odd she said she and Dwayne wanted the baby but during the surrogacy process he was out of town or on FT ( Lmfao ig whatever is good for the goose is good for the gander in regards to this weird situation)
The ISIS chapter made no sense because she did a good job ( her best role yet) but she's mad because she didn't GHETTO-fy it up Lmfaooo & if she did act super ghetto she would've complained about that too !!! She's so indecisive.
This bad energy she's carrying around & the forced happy family situation she's trying to make a trend is soo painfully awkward to watch.
No matter how much suffering it is to the family & how embarrassing it makes her look this is a game she doesn't want to lose ,....
I feel she should've watched her past interviews before writing this book because what she said in prior interviews is vastly different from what she's saying in the book .....
She's so toxic from getting drunk , trying her hardest @ controlling other people, & cussing out her husband friends because they're users who have bad energy ? Lmfaooo girl look in the mirror !!!!! & sage yourself .
I don't regret reading this book because I laughed & took notes on WHAT I DONT WANT , how I WILL NOT act , & what I WON'T put up with .... despite her hurt and pain we can all learn something from this crazy self hating scorpio ♏️ .
She puts a lot of advice in this book ( especially chapter 17 ) but from her confession(s) she doesn't take her own advice .......
I hope she lives up to her own words and create opportunities for black women because in this book she didn't create opportunities for black women only yt women.
Gabrielle is sooo stubborn & doing her best to change her mean girl attitude but you can't change something that's embedded in you . In this book she comes off sooo bitter & resentful because she's not the mother of this dysfunctional man's children; especially in regards to the text Zaire supposedly sent ....
She highlighted Dwayne's mean behavior then tried to cover it up like he really cares about her .... clearly Gabrielle is insecure & afraid to fail so that's why she holds onto this faux happy United front .
I feel she definitely emasculated Dwayne she gets to call his outside child a break baby & he says nothing about it (smh ... I feel if you can boldly disrespect a child without cause you deserve whatever hardships that are COMING your way )
She talks about colorism coming from others but she didn't Explain why she chose a WW surrogate so she's feeding into colorism too .... especially mentioning her White counterparts CONSTANTLY like she did in the last book ( ATP I believe she wish she was white )
especially when she created a role specifically for a yt woman but not a black woman .... she confuses me I can't even take her serious ......
it's so odd she said she and Dwayne wanted the baby but during the surrogacy process he was out of town or on FT ( Lmfao ig whatever is good for the goose is good for the gander in regards to this weird situation)
The ISIS chapter made no sense because she did a good job ( her best role yet) but she's mad because she didn't GHETTO-fy it up Lmfaooo & if she did act super ghetto she would've complained about that too !!! She's so indecisive.
This bad energy she's carrying around & the forced happy family situation she's trying to make a trend is soo painfully awkward to watch.
No matter how much suffering it is to the family & how embarrassing it makes her look this is a game she doesn't want to lose ,....
I feel she should've watched her past interviews before writing this book because what she said in prior interviews is vastly different from what she's saying in the book .....
She's so toxic from getting drunk , trying her hardest @ controlling other people, & cussing out her husband friends because they're users who have bad energy ? Lmfaooo girl look in the mirror !!!!! & sage yourself .
I don't regret reading this book because I laughed & took notes on WHAT I DONT WANT , how I WILL NOT act , & what I WON'T put up with .... despite her hurt and pain we can all learn something from this crazy self hating scorpio ♏️ .
She puts a lot of advice in this book ( especially chapter 17 ) but from her confession(s) she doesn't take her own advice .......
I hope she lives up to her own words and create opportunities for black women because in this book she didn't create opportunities for black women only yt women.
October 27, 2022
Many valuable vignettes and vulnerable moments from Gabrielle’s life. As honest as her first memoir. Valuable listening.
Covers: colorism, fame, racism (in all spaces), identity, trans/lgbtq acceptance and great!!! Parenting!!, fertility struggles, surrogacy, sexual assault PTSD, family, ageism, gender norms, societal pressures, and more!
Union is witty as ever and her voice is powerful!
Covers: colorism, fame, racism (in all spaces), identity, trans/lgbtq acceptance and great!!! Parenting!!, fertility struggles, surrogacy, sexual assault PTSD, family, ageism, gender norms, societal pressures, and more!
Union is witty as ever and her voice is powerful!
March 14, 2022
I love Gabrielle Union, her family, and her story telling skills. I especially loved her letter to her Bring It On character, Isis.
August 14, 2021
I received a "sample" of Gabrielle's upcoming novel. I didn't get to read her first book but I have heard so many amazing things about it. This sample was amazing as well. It gave me that inside peek and I will tell you, there are serious moments and moments where I burst out laughing. Because FUCK BALANCE! No such thing. Instead find "Grace". Definitely check this one out.
February 21, 2022
By now, having listened to Gabrielle Union read both of her books to me, I can attest that this woman can write the sh*t out of a story.
Any story.
You want a story about the time she went to Croatia and was confronted by Neo-Nazis? It's in this latest collection of hers.
How about a story about how differently she wishes she would have portrayed Isis in "Bring It On"? Also there.
Throw in a few more, some meatier than others (including an emotional glimpse into her infertility struggles and a stellar story on her experience parenting her transgender step-daughter, Zaya), and you have the making of a book that, especially on audio, goes down fast and makes you feel like you're having a heart-to-heart with an IRL girlfriend.
I really hope Gabrielle keeps releasing collections like this every few years. I know, if she does, I'll be sure to pick the next one up.
Related: A great companion read is this September 2021 Vanity Fair interview with Union.
Any story.
You want a story about the time she went to Croatia and was confronted by Neo-Nazis? It's in this latest collection of hers.
How about a story about how differently she wishes she would have portrayed Isis in "Bring It On"? Also there.
Throw in a few more, some meatier than others (including an emotional glimpse into her infertility struggles and a stellar story on her experience parenting her transgender step-daughter, Zaya), and you have the making of a book that, especially on audio, goes down fast and makes you feel like you're having a heart-to-heart with an IRL girlfriend.
I really hope Gabrielle keeps releasing collections like this every few years. I know, if she does, I'll be sure to pick the next one up.
Related: A great companion read is this September 2021 Vanity Fair interview with Union.
October 3, 2021
3.5 stars
It felt like a brunch date with an old college friend and she was catching you up on her life. It helps me empathize more with her as a person when I normally see her as an untouchable celebrity. This book just like her last one humanized her life’s journey and reminds us to give others grace.
It felt like a brunch date with an old college friend and she was catching you up on her life. It helps me empathize more with her as a person when I normally see her as an untouchable celebrity. This book just like her last one humanized her life’s journey and reminds us to give others grace.
March 31, 2023
***3.5 Stars***
***Listened to the Audiobook***
September 25, 2021
Too much complaining
I thought this book is more about complaining about things then about her life. For someone who has made it in the white world as you call it I don’t understand.
I thought this book is more about complaining about things then about her life. For someone who has made it in the white world as you call it I don’t understand.
October 21, 2021
Another solid personal essay collection! As with her first, there’s some tremendously heavy shit, but her openness will no doubt help others who’ve experienced the same. Union begins with an emotional retrospection on infertility. Her pain permeates the page and is especially palpable on audio. My favorite essay was about her stepdaughter Zaya, and showing unwavering parental love and support. Union is good people.
October 19, 2021
Another great book on her bookshelf!!! 👏
September 29, 2021
I'm tired of celebrity culture. Living during a pandemic for the last year and a half has revealed what I value and what I don't. I fully believe that people should receive recognition (and fair pay) for their achievements, but lately I have been annoyed with celebrities oversharing details about their lives that we really don't need to know about. Please leave us alone.
I have heard such stories from the Wade's. I know more about their sex life than I wanted to know and trust me, I did not go looking for the details. I am not sure what finally nudged me to purchase Gabrielle Union's book, We're Going to Need More Wine, but I read it in one sitting and loved it.
I was careful to spread You Got Anything Stronger over a week. Union's follow-up did not disappoint and I wanted to savor each chapter. The writing is relatable. Union comes off as a highly successful friend with an extraordinary career and very relatable issues. My favorite section tells the story of the birth of Kaavia James. It should have began with a trigger warning for emotional souls because I damn near sobbed through the entire chapter.
My second favorite story takes place in the bathroom of a strip club. It is both hilarious and perfectly captures the spirit of sisterhood. I love very tender moments when Black women take care of each other just because.
Gabrielle Union has also made some choices that she would not repeat. She writes that the woman that she is today would have left Wade after fathering a child with another woman. Most of the sections dealing with her marriage to Wade are a combination of her deep love for him and their family and highlights of very painful moments. I appreciate Union's transparency and the messages intertwined with each story.
This easily could have been a gossipy tell all offering. Instead, Union offers readers a realistic view of her life. I am still tired of celebrity culture, but I cannot deny that this is a good read.
I have heard such stories from the Wade's. I know more about their sex life than I wanted to know and trust me, I did not go looking for the details. I am not sure what finally nudged me to purchase Gabrielle Union's book, We're Going to Need More Wine, but I read it in one sitting and loved it.
I was careful to spread You Got Anything Stronger over a week. Union's follow-up did not disappoint and I wanted to savor each chapter. The writing is relatable. Union comes off as a highly successful friend with an extraordinary career and very relatable issues. My favorite section tells the story of the birth of Kaavia James. It should have began with a trigger warning for emotional souls because I damn near sobbed through the entire chapter.
My second favorite story takes place in the bathroom of a strip club. It is both hilarious and perfectly captures the spirit of sisterhood. I love very tender moments when Black women take care of each other just because.
Gabrielle Union has also made some choices that she would not repeat. She writes that the woman that she is today would have left Wade after fathering a child with another woman. Most of the sections dealing with her marriage to Wade are a combination of her deep love for him and their family and highlights of very painful moments. I appreciate Union's transparency and the messages intertwined with each story.
This easily could have been a gossipy tell all offering. Instead, Union offers readers a realistic view of her life. I am still tired of celebrity culture, but I cannot deny that this is a good read.
October 8, 2022
In her second memoir, actress Gabrielle Union provides a deeply personal glimpse into her life and that of her family. She opens with her years-long and painful struggle with infertility and her feelings of failure that resulted. Eventually diagnosed with adenomyosis, she and husband Dwyane, after much deliberation, ultimately decide to use a surrogate, a process made more complicated by their prominence. As the book progresses, she discusses intimate and sometimes heartbreaking details of her life, including her sexual assault at age 19, navigating her role as a stepmom, the transition of daughter Zaya, and what community and its strength look like in Hollywood when women of color come together. These stories are balanced by some funny tales as well, including her bowel issues at a strip club and her failed audition for a Matrix sequel. Her ability to infuse her personality into every aspect of this memoir makes it a standout. I listened to this as an audiobook; Union narrates her story, and I highly recommend that format.
For more reading recommendations and author interviews check out my podcast and blog: https://www.thoughtsfromapage.com and follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thoughtsfro....
For more reading recommendations and author interviews check out my podcast and blog: https://www.thoughtsfromapage.com and follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thoughtsfro....
January 12, 2022
This started off really strong and I was really enjoying it in the beginning but began to fall for me about half way through. 3 ⭐️’s is actually probably generous, more like 2.5. Enjoyed her 1st book way more.
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