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The Spare Room
In her first novel in fifteen years, Helen Garner writes about the joys and limits of female friendship under the transforming pressure of illness. "The clear-eyed grace of her prose" in this darkly funny and unsparing novel has been hailed by Peter Carey as "the work of a great writer." Garlanded with awards, dazzling reviewers around the globe, The Spare Room is destined to be a modern literary classic.
175 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2008
About the author
Helen Garner
53 books1,584 followersHelen Garner was born in Geelong in 1942. She has published many works of fiction including Monkey Grip, Cosmo Cosmolino and The Children's Bach. Her fiction has won numerous awards. She is also one of Australia's most respected non-fiction writers, and received a Walkley Award for journalism in 1993.
Her most recent books are The First Stone, True Stories, My Hard Heart, The Feel of Stone and Joe Cinque's Consolation. In 2006 she won the Melbourne Prize for Literature. She lives in Melbourne.
Praise for Helen Garner's work
'Helen Garner is an extraordinarily good writer. There is not a paragraph, let alone a page, where she does not compel your attention.'
Bulletin
'She is outstanding in the accuracy of her observations, the intensity of passion...her radar-sure humour.'
Washington Post
'Garner has always had a mimic's ear for dialogue and an eye for unconscious symbolism, the clothes and gestures with which we give ourselves away.'
Peter Craven, Australian
'Helen Garner writes the best sentences in Australia.'
Ed Campion, Bulletin
Her most recent books are The First Stone, True Stories, My Hard Heart, The Feel of Stone and Joe Cinque's Consolation. In 2006 she won the Melbourne Prize for Literature. She lives in Melbourne.
Praise for Helen Garner's work
'Helen Garner is an extraordinarily good writer. There is not a paragraph, let alone a page, where she does not compel your attention.'
Bulletin
'She is outstanding in the accuracy of her observations, the intensity of passion...her radar-sure humour.'
Washington Post
'Garner has always had a mimic's ear for dialogue and an eye for unconscious symbolism, the clothes and gestures with which we give ourselves away.'
Peter Craven, Australian
'Helen Garner writes the best sentences in Australia.'
Ed Campion, Bulletin
Ratings & Reviews
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August 30, 2026
مادربزرگ من سال‌ها درگیر آلزایمر و فلج ناشی از آرتروز و پوکی استخوان بود و با رنج و درد زیادی زندگی کرد؛ و در تمام این سال‌ها اعضای خانواده من از او مراقبت کردند. خاطراتی که از آن سال‌ها در ذهن من مانده، از سخت‌ترین و تلخ‌ترین خاطرات زندگی‌ام هستند که هیچ‌وقت نمی‌توانم فراموششان کنم. خاطراتی که تلخی شان فقط به خاطر بیماری و رنج مادربزرگم نبود، بلکه اعتراف میکنم بیشتر به خاطر دیدن خستگی روحی و جسمی مادر و زن‌عمویم بود که عاشقانه دوستشان داشتم و می‌دیدم چطور زیر بار مراقبت از مادربزرگم، پیر، عصبی و فرسوده می‌شوند. آن سال‌ها من به چشم خودم دیدم که بیماری لاعلاج یا صعب‌العلاج فقط بیمار را درگیر و ناتوان نمی‌کند؛ بلکه تمام خانواده و خانه و هر شخص نزدیک به بیمار را درگیر خودش میکند و از پا می‌اندازد.
بیمار درد میکشد، می‌ترسد، گریه میکند، فریاد میکشد، کفر می‌گوید، گاهی شکر میکند، دعا میخواند، گاهی از عجز ناله میکند و تمام اینها را وقتی به پای دردی که میکشد می‌گذاری چاره‌ای جز پذیرش و همدلی نداری.
اما مراقب اش در موقعیت عجیبی گیر میکند چرا که او بیمار نیست، پس از انتظار می‌رود قوی بماند، به زندگی عادی‌اش در کنار مراقبت شبانه‌روزی از بیمار ادامه دهد، پس باید کار کند، غذا درست کند، جواب تلفن‌ها را بدهد، از عیادت کنندگان پذیرایی کند و حواسش به خودش، به بچه‌هایش و دیگران باشد. اما بیمار نیست اما در عین حال آن‌قدر به بیماری نزدیک است که آن را درست کنار خود دوش به دوش و یا حتی شاید سوار شانه‌هایش حس میکند، پس هیچ‌وقت نمی‌تواند مثل یک آدم عادی زندگی کند.
بنظر من سخت‌ترین بخش مراقبت از بیماری هم همین است؛ اینکه رنج او هیچ‌وقت به اندازه رنج کسی که از او مراقبت میکند، مشروع به نظر نمی‌رسد.
مراقبت، برخلاف تصویری که معمولاً از آن داریم و نتیجه داستانها و فیلم‌های دراماتیک است، اصلا تجربه‌ای لطیف و فداکارانه نیست. مراقبت از بیمار می‌تواند آدم را خسته، عصبانی، بی‌حوصله و حتی گاهی از کسی که دوستش دارد بیزار کند و پذیرفتن همین احساسات، از خود عمل مراقبت کردن دشوارتر است.
برای همین وقتی «اتاقی برای مهمان» را می‌خواندم، خشم و خستگی هلن برایم اصلاً چیز تازه‌ای نبود.
این کتاب، رمان کوتاه و فشرده‌ای از هلن گارنر، نویسنده استرالیایی است که در سال ۲۰۰۸ منتشر شده. گارنر این کتاب را مستقیماً از روی تجربه خودش نوشته و آن دوره پرتنش، فرسایشی و پر از تناقض را تبدیل به این روایت کرده است. برای همین هم این کتاب نه رمانتیک است، نه اخلاق‌گرا و نه تسلی‌دهنده؛ بلکه خیلی نزدیک و مماس با واقعیت ایستاده است.
اول از عنوان کتاب شروع میکنم که چقدر هوشمندانه انتخاب است. «اتاقی برای مهمان» کنایه‌ای‌ست از آن بخش از زندگی و روان مراقب که اضافی و در دسترس فرض می‌شود. از نظر فرهنگی معمولا جامعه فرض میکند که در زندگی یک زن، همیشه یک اتاق خالی وجود دارد که می‌تواند یک بیمار را در آن اسکان دهد، بدون اینکه ساختار اصلی خانه، یعنی آرامش روانی خود او به هم بریزد. اما گارنر نشان می‌دهد که آن اتاق اتفاقاً مرکز خانه روانی مراقب است؛ و وقتی آن اتاق درگیر بیماری می‌شود، کل خانه دچار فروپاشی می‌شود.
داستان از زبان هلن روایت می‌شود؛ زنی که دوست قدیمی‌ش نیکولا را که سرطان پیشرفته دارد برای سه هفته در خانه‌ش جا می‌دهد. از همان ابتدا مشخص است که مراقبت هلن از نیکولا فقط یک عمل مهربونانه و داوطلبانه نیست و هلن عملا در موقعیتی قرار گرفته که چاره‌ای جز پذیرش نقش مراقب را ندارد. هلن کم‌کم خسته، بی‌خواب، تحریک‌پذیر و حتی گاهی از نیکولا بیزار می‌شود و در عین حال، مدام خودش را سرزنش میکند که چرا نمی‌تواند صبورتر، فداکارتر و زنانه‌تر در مقابل بیماری لاعلاج دوستش رفتار کند.
مسله این است که هلن فقط با یک موقعیت سخت مواجه نیست؛ او با تصویر کلیشه‌ای از زن خوب و دوست خوب هم درگیر است چرا که از او انتظار می‌رود مراقب دوست بیمارش باشد، سختی ها را تحمل کند، در دسترس باشد و نیازهای خودش را تا جای ممکن عقب بیندازد.
بنابراین وقتی دیگر خسته می‌شود یا از رفتارهای عجیب و خودخواهی های نیکولا دلخور می‌شود، مجبور می‌شود درباره حق خودش برای خسته شدن هم احساس گناه و عذاب وجدان کند.
مسئله دیگر این است که مشکل هلن فقط مراقبت روزمره از بیمار نیست؛ حضور نیکولا به تدریج روی زمان، خلوت، روابط و حتی احساسات هلن اثر می‌گذارد. هلن همزمان که از وضعیت دوستش ناراحت و نگران است، از محدود شدن زندگی خودش هم عصبانی می‌شود. چیزی که این خشم را به احساسی پیچیده تبدیل میکند، این است که هلن نمی‌تواند به‌سادگی آن را بپذیرد. بیماری نیکولا باعث می‌شود هر اعتراض یا دلخوری‌ای از طرف هلن، برای خودش شبیه خودخواهی به نظر برسد.
به همین دلیل فرسودگی هلن فقط نتیجه حجم مراقبت‌هایش نیست؛ نتیجه احساس گناهی است که همراه مراقبت به وجود می‌آید. او نه‌تنها خسته است، بلکه بابت خسته بودن هم خودش را قضاوت میکند. نه‌تنها عصبانی است، بلکه از عصبانی بودنش هم احساس شرم میکند و اینها است که فشار موقعیت را چند برابر میکند.
از نظر من بهترین بخش این رمان این است که گارنر فداکاری زنانه را رمانتیک جلوه نمی‌دهد و از زن در نقش پرستار و مراقب، یک الهه قدسی نمی‌سازد. او نشان می‌دهد که عشق واقعی می‌تواند در کنار خشم، انزجار و فرسودگی هم وجود داشته باشد و اینها همدیگر را نفی نمی‌کنند. هلن می‌تواند نگران نیکولا باشد و همزمان از او خسته شود؛ می‌تواند دوستش داشته باشد و از حضورش در خانه به ستوه بیاید. اگر گارنر هرکدام از این احساسات را حذف می‌کرد، تجربه مراقبت در رمانش غیرواقعی و باورنکردنی میشد.
مهم‌ترین پیامی هم که این رمان درباره مراقبت به ما می‌گوید این است که مراقبت وقتی با عشق همراه است، لزوماً باعث آسان‌تر شدن آن نمی‌شود.
.............
من کتاب رو هدیه گرفتم، که خیلی بابتش ذوق زده و سپاسگزارم ♡♡
این کتاب رو در گروه همخوانی جریده فریده خوندیم، ممنونم از دوستانی که در همخوانی شرکت کردن ♡♡
بیمار درد میکشد، می‌ترسد، گریه میکند، فریاد میکشد، کفر می‌گوید، گاهی شکر میکند، دعا میخواند، گاهی از عجز ناله میکند و تمام اینها را وقتی به پای دردی که میکشد می‌گذاری چاره‌ای جز پذیرش و همدلی نداری.
اما مراقب اش در موقعیت عجیبی گیر میکند چرا که او بیمار نیست، پس از انتظار می‌رود قوی بماند، به زندگی عادی‌اش در کنار مراقبت شبانه‌روزی از بیمار ادامه دهد، پس باید کار کند، غذا درست کند، جواب تلفن‌ها را بدهد، از عیادت کنندگان پذیرایی کند و حواسش به خودش، به بچه‌هایش و دیگران باشد. اما بیمار نیست اما در عین حال آن‌قدر به بیماری نزدیک است که آن را درست کنار خود دوش به دوش و یا حتی شاید سوار شانه‌هایش حس میکند، پس هیچ‌وقت نمی‌تواند مثل یک آدم عادی زندگی کند.
بنظر من سخت‌ترین بخش مراقبت از بیماری هم همین است؛ اینکه رنج او هیچ‌وقت به اندازه رنج کسی که از او مراقبت میکند، مشروع به نظر نمی‌رسد.
مراقبت، برخلاف تصویری که معمولاً از آن داریم و نتیجه داستانها و فیلم‌های دراماتیک است، اصلا تجربه‌ای لطیف و فداکارانه نیست. مراقبت از بیمار می‌تواند آدم را خسته، عصبانی، بی‌حوصله و حتی گاهی از کسی که دوستش دارد بیزار کند و پذیرفتن همین احساسات، از خود عمل مراقبت کردن دشوارتر است.
برای همین وقتی «اتاقی برای مهمان» را می‌خواندم، خشم و خستگی هلن برایم اصلاً چیز تازه‌ای نبود.
این کتاب، رمان کوتاه و فشرده‌ای از هلن گارنر، نویسنده استرالیایی است که در سال ۲۰۰۸ منتشر شده. گارنر این کتاب را مستقیماً از روی تجربه خودش نوشته و آن دوره پرتنش، فرسایشی و پر از تناقض را تبدیل به این روایت کرده است. برای همین هم این کتاب نه رمانتیک است، نه اخلاق‌گرا و نه تسلی‌دهنده؛ بلکه خیلی نزدیک و مماس با واقعیت ایستاده است.
اول از عنوان کتاب شروع میکنم که چقدر هوشمندانه انتخاب است. «اتاقی برای مهمان» کنایه‌ای‌ست از آن بخش از زندگی و روان مراقب که اضافی و در دسترس فرض می‌شود. از نظر فرهنگی معمولا جامعه فرض میکند که در زندگی یک زن، همیشه یک اتاق خالی وجود دارد که می‌تواند یک بیمار را در آن اسکان دهد، بدون اینکه ساختار اصلی خانه، یعنی آرامش روانی خود او به هم بریزد. اما گارنر نشان می‌دهد که آن اتاق اتفاقاً مرکز خانه روانی مراقب است؛ و وقتی آن اتاق درگیر بیماری می‌شود، کل خانه دچار فروپاشی می‌شود.
داستان از زبان هلن روایت می‌شود؛ زنی که دوست قدیمی‌ش نیکولا را که سرطان پیشرفته دارد برای سه هفته در خانه‌ش جا می‌دهد. از همان ابتدا مشخص است که مراقبت هلن از نیکولا فقط یک عمل مهربونانه و داوطلبانه نیست و هلن عملا در موقعیتی قرار گرفته که چاره‌ای جز پذیرش نقش مراقب را ندارد. هلن کم‌کم خسته، بی‌خواب، تحریک‌پذیر و حتی گاهی از نیکولا بیزار می‌شود و در عین حال، مدام خودش را سرزنش میکند که چرا نمی‌تواند صبورتر، فداکارتر و زنانه‌تر در مقابل بیماری لاعلاج دوستش رفتار کند.
مسله این است که هلن فقط با یک موقعیت سخت مواجه نیست؛ او با تصویر کلیشه‌ای از زن خوب و دوست خوب هم درگیر است چرا که از او انتظار می‌رود مراقب دوست بیمارش باشد، سختی ها را تحمل کند، در دسترس باشد و نیازهای خودش را تا جای ممکن عقب بیندازد.
بنابراین وقتی دیگر خسته می‌شود یا از رفتارهای عجیب و خودخواهی های نیکولا دلخور می‌شود، مجبور می‌شود درباره حق خودش برای خسته شدن هم احساس گناه و عذاب وجدان کند.
مسئله دیگر این است که مشکل هلن فقط مراقبت روزمره از بیمار نیست؛ حضور نیکولا به تدریج روی زمان، خلوت، روابط و حتی احساسات هلن اثر می‌گذارد. هلن همزمان که از وضعیت دوستش ناراحت و نگران است، از محدود شدن زندگی خودش هم عصبانی می‌شود. چیزی که این خشم را به احساسی پیچیده تبدیل میکند، این است که هلن نمی‌تواند به‌سادگی آن را بپذیرد. بیماری نیکولا باعث می‌شود هر اعتراض یا دلخوری‌ای از طرف هلن، برای خودش شبیه خودخواهی به نظر برسد.
به همین دلیل فرسودگی هلن فقط نتیجه حجم مراقبت‌هایش نیست؛ نتیجه احساس گناهی است که همراه مراقبت به وجود می‌آید. او نه‌تنها خسته است، بلکه بابت خسته بودن هم خودش را قضاوت میکند. نه‌تنها عصبانی است، بلکه از عصبانی بودنش هم احساس شرم میکند و اینها است که فشار موقعیت را چند برابر میکند.
از نظر من بهترین بخش این رمان این است که گارنر فداکاری زنانه را رمانتیک جلوه نمی‌دهد و از زن در نقش پرستار و مراقب، یک الهه قدسی نمی‌سازد. او نشان می‌دهد که عشق واقعی می‌تواند در کنار خشم، انزجار و فرسودگی هم وجود داشته باشد و اینها همدیگر را نفی نمی‌کنند. هلن می‌تواند نگران نیکولا باشد و همزمان از او خسته شود؛ می‌تواند دوستش داشته باشد و از حضورش در خانه به ستوه بیاید. اگر گارنر هرکدام از این احساسات را حذف می‌کرد، تجربه مراقبت در رمانش غیرواقعی و باورنکردنی میشد.
مهم‌ترین پیامی هم که این رمان درباره مراقبت به ما می‌گوید این است که مراقبت وقتی با عشق همراه است، لزوماً باعث آسان‌تر شدن آن نمی‌شود.
.............
من کتاب رو هدیه گرفتم، که خیلی بابتش ذوق زده و سپاسگزارم ♡♡
این کتاب رو در گروه همخوانی جریده فریده خوندیم، ممنونم از دوستانی که در همخوانی شرکت کردن ♡♡
July 23, 2013
The Spare Room is a shortish novel from 2008 by the Australian writer Helen Garner. It was published to critical acclaim. All the action takes place over the course of three weeks and describes the experience of a woman in Melbourne, Helen, as she finds herself looking after a friend from Sydney, Nicola, who is dying of bowel cancer.
It is an unusual novel as it is told exclusively from the inner perspective of Helen herself. The feelings and emotions experienced by Nicola are never described, and yet one might have assumed that this would be the novel's main focus. It starts with Helen's feelings of shock and indignation. How can a friend who is terminally ill foist herself on Helen as a guest, without being honest about how serious her condition is? It quickly becomes clear to both Helen and the reader that this is because Nicola herself is in complete denial about the situation.
Nicola is keen to pursue alternative therapy treatment for her disease, and Helen feels her duty as a friend to enable this to take place. At first receptive to Nicola's wishes, her suspicions grow when she sees the ordeal Nicola is put though each time. The practitioners are breezy and overconfident; delays abound, yet the staff remain unconcerned at the agony this puts Nicola through. There is no help with pain, or apparently any professional monitoring of treatment or improvement. There is no historical evidence, and little anecdotal testimony - merely upbeat and meaningless chat, which Nicola finds impossible to accept.
Helen has serious fears that these "therapies" selected by Helen are not only not doing anything positive, but may actually be causing harm. She hates to be critical of anything which has a remote chance of working, when the prognosis as stated by mainstream doctors has been so bleak, but she also becomes increasingly aware that there are some charlatans at work in the alternative field, and that she is the only one able to stop her friend's possibly premature and painful self-destruction.
As the novel progresses, we follow Helen's thoughts, of disbelief, desperate hope, rage, impotence, despair, compassion, loyalty, guilt - a whole panoply of both emotional and carefully considered reactions. The descriptions are direct and the language simple. Short sentences often enable the action, which often reads like a journal, to flow easily. The reader can easily empathise with Helen's frustration and burgeoning anger. Helen cannot believe that her friend, usually so quick and clever at assessing people, can be hoodwinked so completely despite the evidence stacking up.
She also feels a conflict between her natural compassion - accepting the weariness and fatigue due to the lengths to which a carer has to go - and a feeling of being taken advantage of whilst Nicola infuriatingly persists in making light of her illness. Helen is permanently angry; increasingly both physically and emotionally exhausted. Something has to snap. She finally insists that her friend confront the true situation, the sure knowledge that she will imminently die.
The descriptions and observations are made with sensitivity. In no way is this a hatchet job on alternative medicines. The details of this aspect of the novel are of specific individual cases of fraudulent practitioners, with unrealistic and dangerously misleading expectations. Both main characters are in their early sixties; intelligent people, mature and experienced enough through their travels to have a clear eye for a different approach, never assuming that Western medicine is the only way. Nicola comes across as a flamboyant character, and is characterised as a ex-hippy.
The novel has a sense of authenticity. The language used is direct and powerful; the situations and conflicting thoughts familiar to anyone who has had contact with serious illness and mortality. It is interesting that Helen Garner chose to give her narrator, the viewpoint character, the same name as herself, and it seems very likely that this was quite deliberate. The author had been writing nonfiction for 16 years before returning to fiction, and this book has a similar feeling to a documentary; it feels "real". Sure enough, a little research reveals that Helen Garner has drawn quite heavily on her own experience, and that many of the components of the novel come from details in the author's own life.
Just as the "Helen" of the book has her daughter Eva and Eva's children as neighbours, in real life Helen Garner lives next door to her daughter Alice and her children. There are similarities between them too; Alice Garner is an actress and musician. But perhaps the most significant parallel is that the author herself spent time caring for her friend, Jenya Osborne, when she was dying. It is tempting to think that Helen Garner consciously made the choice to use her own first name for the main character, as she wanted to focus on the actual emotions that she felt as her friend was dying, whether or not they were very pleasant to hear, acceptable, justified - or even very understandable. This, the author seems to be saying throughout, is how it really is. Life is messy.
The ending is inevitable, but it happens "off-stage". We have known right from the start that Nicola intends to stay for a mere three weeks - the length of the course of "treatment" for which she has been persuaded she needs to travel to Melbourne. By the end of the novel we have met a couple of other relatives willing to help, and we flash forward to several months later, when Nicola has returned to Sydney. She has made a proper decision, with full awareness of her situation, rather than a pipe-dream.
Her decision incorporates both the mainstream oncology of Western tradition, but also has a nod toward Buddhist philosophy. Many readers may find some aspect of the ending which resonates with them, whatever their personal beliefs. It does not reflect a narrow view. Possibly Helen Garner felt that in fiction she would be able to set down a wider approach to the situation than she herself felt when confronted with it. She could also perhaps resolve some issues better in fiction. Perhaps a psychologist might say that such an approach was the author working out their problems.
The novel makes a brave effort at an impartial view, accurately told, of what feels to all those concerned like an intolerable situation. It is not an attempt at a persuasive tale, but more a chronicle of possible events, in an area pitted with dangers, but few definitive answers as to a "right" approach. It was possibly cathartic to write; it is certainly compelling to read. And afterwards a reader might feel that their knowledge of the human condition is just that little bit wider and deeper.
It is an unusual novel as it is told exclusively from the inner perspective of Helen herself. The feelings and emotions experienced by Nicola are never described, and yet one might have assumed that this would be the novel's main focus. It starts with Helen's feelings of shock and indignation. How can a friend who is terminally ill foist herself on Helen as a guest, without being honest about how serious her condition is? It quickly becomes clear to both Helen and the reader that this is because Nicola herself is in complete denial about the situation.
Nicola is keen to pursue alternative therapy treatment for her disease, and Helen feels her duty as a friend to enable this to take place. At first receptive to Nicola's wishes, her suspicions grow when she sees the ordeal Nicola is put though each time. The practitioners are breezy and overconfident; delays abound, yet the staff remain unconcerned at the agony this puts Nicola through. There is no help with pain, or apparently any professional monitoring of treatment or improvement. There is no historical evidence, and little anecdotal testimony - merely upbeat and meaningless chat, which Nicola finds impossible to accept.
Helen has serious fears that these "therapies" selected by Helen are not only not doing anything positive, but may actually be causing harm. She hates to be critical of anything which has a remote chance of working, when the prognosis as stated by mainstream doctors has been so bleak, but she also becomes increasingly aware that there are some charlatans at work in the alternative field, and that she is the only one able to stop her friend's possibly premature and painful self-destruction.
As the novel progresses, we follow Helen's thoughts, of disbelief, desperate hope, rage, impotence, despair, compassion, loyalty, guilt - a whole panoply of both emotional and carefully considered reactions. The descriptions are direct and the language simple. Short sentences often enable the action, which often reads like a journal, to flow easily. The reader can easily empathise with Helen's frustration and burgeoning anger. Helen cannot believe that her friend, usually so quick and clever at assessing people, can be hoodwinked so completely despite the evidence stacking up.
She also feels a conflict between her natural compassion - accepting the weariness and fatigue due to the lengths to which a carer has to go - and a feeling of being taken advantage of whilst Nicola infuriatingly persists in making light of her illness. Helen is permanently angry; increasingly both physically and emotionally exhausted. Something has to snap. She finally insists that her friend confront the true situation, the sure knowledge that she will imminently die.
The descriptions and observations are made with sensitivity. In no way is this a hatchet job on alternative medicines. The details of this aspect of the novel are of specific individual cases of fraudulent practitioners, with unrealistic and dangerously misleading expectations. Both main characters are in their early sixties; intelligent people, mature and experienced enough through their travels to have a clear eye for a different approach, never assuming that Western medicine is the only way. Nicola comes across as a flamboyant character, and is characterised as a ex-hippy.
The novel has a sense of authenticity. The language used is direct and powerful; the situations and conflicting thoughts familiar to anyone who has had contact with serious illness and mortality. It is interesting that Helen Garner chose to give her narrator, the viewpoint character, the same name as herself, and it seems very likely that this was quite deliberate. The author had been writing nonfiction for 16 years before returning to fiction, and this book has a similar feeling to a documentary; it feels "real". Sure enough, a little research reveals that Helen Garner has drawn quite heavily on her own experience, and that many of the components of the novel come from details in the author's own life.
Just as the "Helen" of the book has her daughter Eva and Eva's children as neighbours, in real life Helen Garner lives next door to her daughter Alice and her children. There are similarities between them too; Alice Garner is an actress and musician. But perhaps the most significant parallel is that the author herself spent time caring for her friend, Jenya Osborne, when she was dying. It is tempting to think that Helen Garner consciously made the choice to use her own first name for the main character, as she wanted to focus on the actual emotions that she felt as her friend was dying, whether or not they were very pleasant to hear, acceptable, justified - or even very understandable. This, the author seems to be saying throughout, is how it really is. Life is messy.
The ending is inevitable, but it happens "off-stage". We have known right from the start that Nicola intends to stay for a mere three weeks - the length of the course of "treatment" for which she has been persuaded she needs to travel to Melbourne. By the end of the novel we have met a couple of other relatives willing to help, and we flash forward to several months later, when Nicola has returned to Sydney. She has made a proper decision, with full awareness of her situation, rather than a pipe-dream.
Her decision incorporates both the mainstream oncology of Western tradition, but also has a nod toward Buddhist philosophy. Many readers may find some aspect of the ending which resonates with them, whatever their personal beliefs. It does not reflect a narrow view. Possibly Helen Garner felt that in fiction she would be able to set down a wider approach to the situation than she herself felt when confronted with it. She could also perhaps resolve some issues better in fiction. Perhaps a psychologist might say that such an approach was the author working out their problems.
The novel makes a brave effort at an impartial view, accurately told, of what feels to all those concerned like an intolerable situation. It is not an attempt at a persuasive tale, but more a chronicle of possible events, in an area pitted with dangers, but few definitive answers as to a "right" approach. It was possibly cathartic to write; it is certainly compelling to read. And afterwards a reader might feel that their knowledge of the human condition is just that little bit wider and deeper.
January 11, 2020
Three years ago two of my close friends died of cancer within four months. It was really a terrible year. With my friend Jim, it was a long drawn-out affair. He’d beaten lymphoma 25 years earlier. Then it came back. But the cancer didn’t kill him directly. It broke his immune system so that repeated exhausting bouts of infections and pneumonia finally did. He had been in & out of hospital for months.
With my friend Nick (previously the healthiest of us all, the one who was doing the half marathons and working up to a full marathon) it was fairly rapid.
Gruesome health message for men :
During the last month Nick had a hospital bed installed in his home. He lived in a town 30 miles from here so I visited several times. During this last month his poor wife was almost crushed by his care. Sure, nurses would visit twice a day. But it wasn’t enough. He needed various meds every 4 hours, 24 hours a day. In his state he could not see she was at the end of her tether. One time I visited she began telling me her problems looking after Nick and didn’t stop for over an hour. There was a blithe disregard of her situation by the medical personnel and by her husband.
This short novel is exactly about that. Really, this is one of those memoirs published as a novel. Helen Garner even calls herself Helen in the book.
So Nicola, a friend of Helen comes to stay for three weeks while she undergoes a course of alternative therapy. She has bowel cancer. Helen asks a medical guy about Nicola’s situation:
”You work with cancer patients,” I said. “Does this sound bad?”
He shrugged. “Pretty bad. Stage four.”
“How many stages are there?”
“Four.”
Naturally (is that a cruel word?) the alternative therapy turns out to be well-meaning (is that the right word?) nonsense. Aka borderline-fraudulent. But Nicola is wearing the fixed smiles and glassyeyed expressions of the true believer & so drags herself off for daily intensive vitamin C infusions which leave her wracked with pain for hours. Her care is a 24/7 thing (multiple changes of bedclothes required each night) and her friend Helen is rapidly pushed to the edge, pulled every which way by her love of her old friend and her hatred of the old friend’s crazy denial and willingness to be defrauded.
My two friends never had any alternative therapy notions, so at least spared their families that heartache.
This is a strong no nonsense read-in-a-day book that puts you right in the middle of a nightmare I hope nobody reading this finds themselves in, ever.
With my friend Nick (previously the healthiest of us all, the one who was doing the half marathons and working up to a full marathon) it was fairly rapid.
Gruesome health message for men :
During the last month Nick had a hospital bed installed in his home. He lived in a town 30 miles from here so I visited several times. During this last month his poor wife was almost crushed by his care. Sure, nurses would visit twice a day. But it wasn’t enough. He needed various meds every 4 hours, 24 hours a day. In his state he could not see she was at the end of her tether. One time I visited she began telling me her problems looking after Nick and didn’t stop for over an hour. There was a blithe disregard of her situation by the medical personnel and by her husband.
This short novel is exactly about that. Really, this is one of those memoirs published as a novel. Helen Garner even calls herself Helen in the book.
So Nicola, a friend of Helen comes to stay for three weeks while she undergoes a course of alternative therapy. She has bowel cancer. Helen asks a medical guy about Nicola’s situation:
”You work with cancer patients,” I said. “Does this sound bad?”
He shrugged. “Pretty bad. Stage four.”
“How many stages are there?”
“Four.”
Naturally (is that a cruel word?) the alternative therapy turns out to be well-meaning (is that the right word?) nonsense. Aka borderline-fraudulent. But Nicola is wearing the fixed smiles and glassyeyed expressions of the true believer & so drags herself off for daily intensive vitamin C infusions which leave her wracked with pain for hours. Her care is a 24/7 thing (multiple changes of bedclothes required each night) and her friend Helen is rapidly pushed to the edge, pulled every which way by her love of her old friend and her hatred of the old friend’s crazy denial and willingness to be defrauded.
My two friends never had any alternative therapy notions, so at least spared their families that heartache.
This is a strong no nonsense read-in-a-day book that puts you right in the middle of a nightmare I hope nobody reading this finds themselves in, ever.
March 3, 2025
A genuine look at dying and taking care of a dying person without excessive sentimentality, but the necessary amount of honesty and heart. Very short, made me mile and smirk at times, but also sad, as Nicola reminded me a lot of someone and due to my own fears and anxieties. I’ve read it for the Shine and Shadow March Light read, very recommended.
July 3, 2020
I have never seen a human heart. Its biological constituents are a mystery to me. I am ignorant when it comes to the appearance of someone else’s heart but I know, I know how mine looks. My heart has a tiered structure. I am yet to figure out how many tiers my heart has, but at the lowermost section is a spare room. The spare room is reserved for bubbling and sanctimonious human lives spread all over our beloved earth. You knock down a wide geographical expanse, my heart bleeds. You selflessly pass your warm hand over a cold soul, it submerges my insides in happiness. Helen had a spare room as well; in her heart, I do not know, but certainly in her house. I would like to believe that Helen, like me, had a spare room in her heart as well, otherwise, why would Helen Garner, the author of this book, begin Helen’s story with such a lovely quote: “It is a privilege to prepare the place where someone else will sleep.”
When The Spare Room begins, Helen is making her spare room liveable for her ‘new friend’, Nicola. Nicola is battling with cancer and is a believer of alternative treatments and ways of life. By alternative, I wish to reiterate everything that is not usually looked upon with an honest nod, superstitions, for instance. The spare room in Helen’s heart makes her align what is to be Nicola’s bed for three weeks to the North-South direction. Helen is not sure about this, but when has the spare room let us make our decisions rationally? A mirror breaks in the spare room and my upbringing tells me that the devil has been summoned. Turns out, the devil is no-one but Nicola, the believer.
The Spare Room is based on the illness of Helen Garner’s friend, Jenya Osborne. Although seemingly sweet, Garner is notorious among her friends and acquaintances for including whatever they say or do in her books. And supposedly, my brain (I am not all hearts) cannot help thinking that she did the same here. She once said that writing a novel is like “trying to make a patchwork quilt look seamless” and writing this review, I could not agree more with her. She has scattered the little pieces of my brain but as the world would not have my scattered pieces, I am trying to showcase my neatness. The Spare Room, more than a tussle between life and death, as is expected from a novel on a terminal illness, is a battle between exhaustion, rage and helplessness that is fought ruthlessly in the angelic body of a caregiver.
When The Spare Room begins, Helen is making her spare room liveable for her ‘new friend’, Nicola. Nicola is battling with cancer and is a believer of alternative treatments and ways of life. By alternative, I wish to reiterate everything that is not usually looked upon with an honest nod, superstitions, for instance. The spare room in Helen’s heart makes her align what is to be Nicola’s bed for three weeks to the North-South direction. Helen is not sure about this, but when has the spare room let us make our decisions rationally? A mirror breaks in the spare room and my upbringing tells me that the devil has been summoned. Turns out, the devil is no-one but Nicola, the believer.
The Spare Room is based on the illness of Helen Garner’s friend, Jenya Osborne. Although seemingly sweet, Garner is notorious among her friends and acquaintances for including whatever they say or do in her books. And supposedly, my brain (I am not all hearts) cannot help thinking that she did the same here. She once said that writing a novel is like “trying to make a patchwork quilt look seamless” and writing this review, I could not agree more with her. She has scattered the little pieces of my brain but as the world would not have my scattered pieces, I am trying to showcase my neatness. The Spare Room, more than a tussle between life and death, as is expected from a novel on a terminal illness, is a battle between exhaustion, rage and helplessness that is fought ruthlessly in the angelic body of a caregiver.
June 28, 2022
HG writes like a champ (well she is a pro AND her books are used in University reading lists) and in this one the protag is Helen, and this reads like a non fiction really, so you know me, I assume it’s non fiction as my audiobooks are usually chosen in the car!
Helen lovingly prepares her spare room for a friend, Nicola, whom she hasn't known as a life long friend. They have known each other for around 15 years. Helen doesn't have a lot of experience with palliaitive care, but she looks after her friend amazingly well. Nicola was a strong woman, never married but a woman that knew herself well and a woman who she respected.
It was hard for Helen to see her friend so frail, having turned up with so little, and what she did have seemed to be threadbare. Helen was smart, she could see the clinic that Nicola had given her money to was off in all respects, and this is where I could see the real Helen kick in, contacting old journalist friends etc, asking for advice on how to make a real complaint.
Nicola clearly had blind faith and Helen was sad and very overworked; but she was not mean, she kept up her high level of care - washing numerous loads of washing every night, cooking for and caring for her friend.
Helen Garner is very skilled, and I read that this was her first work of fiction in fifteen years. This reads like a memoir, so I would definitely have thoughts of literary fiction here. How could this following quote not be true while flicking through a New Weekly magazine in the dodgy cancer clinic:
..looking for cosmetic surgery disasters to sneer at. Once we would have gone into paroxysms together at a condition known as trout mouth.
Scenes of watching the telly while eating tea, or lounging around painting toe nails on the lounge. This book is not reminiscent of the seriousness of the Farquharson trials or the uneven gender debate in The first stone but damn this lady can write.
Helen lovingly prepares her spare room for a friend, Nicola, whom she hasn't known as a life long friend. They have known each other for around 15 years. Helen doesn't have a lot of experience with palliaitive care, but she looks after her friend amazingly well. Nicola was a strong woman, never married but a woman that knew herself well and a woman who she respected.
It was hard for Helen to see her friend so frail, having turned up with so little, and what she did have seemed to be threadbare. Helen was smart, she could see the clinic that Nicola had given her money to was off in all respects, and this is where I could see the real Helen kick in, contacting old journalist friends etc, asking for advice on how to make a real complaint.
Nicola clearly had blind faith and Helen was sad and very overworked; but she was not mean, she kept up her high level of care - washing numerous loads of washing every night, cooking for and caring for her friend.
Helen Garner is very skilled, and I read that this was her first work of fiction in fifteen years. This reads like a memoir, so I would definitely have thoughts of literary fiction here. How could this following quote not be true while flicking through a New Weekly magazine in the dodgy cancer clinic:
..looking for cosmetic surgery disasters to sneer at. Once we would have gone into paroxysms together at a condition known as trout mouth.
Scenes of watching the telly while eating tea, or lounging around painting toe nails on the lounge. This book is not reminiscent of the seriousness of the Farquharson trials or the uneven gender debate in The first stone but damn this lady can write.
January 18, 2022
hayatta olmak istemediğimiz yerler var. şu yaşlarda mesela hemen hemen tüm arkadaşlarım ana-babalarının sağlık problemleriyle ilgileniyorlar. 40’lı yaşların kuralı sanki.
daha ileride ise arkadaşlarımızın sağlık problemleriyle ilgilendiğimiz günler gelecek. sıralı ölüm daha kolay kabul ediliyor belki ama kardeşlerimizi, arkadaşlarımızı kaybetmeye başlayacağız.
evet çok can sıkıcı konulardan başladım ama misafir odası ben mahvetti okurken.
3 haftalığına alternatif bir kanser tedavisi için evini arkadaşı helen’a açan nicola’nın çaresizliği, o 3 haftanın her bir gecesinin uzunluğu, nicola’nın sabrı tükenir gibi olduğunda kendini ve nasıl bir arkadaş olduğunu sorgulaması… öyle gerçek ve içten ki.
ağır hastaya bakan herkes bu duyguları bilir. babamın iki büyük ameliyatında ve sonrasında yaşadıklarımı tekrar yaşadım dün gece romanı okurken. hastanede geçirilen gecelerin 1500 saat sürmesi, evdeki işler, o çarşaflar… ki kitapta da hep var o yıkanacak çarşaflar.
burada helen’e kızmak için sebebi de var nicola’nın. saçma sapan bir alternatif tedaviye inanması ki ömrü boyu böyleymiş, daha sonra öğreniyoruz. ama bir insana ölümü kabullenmiyor diye kızmak ne kadar doğru?
yaşlı bencilliği diye de hasta bencilliği diye de bir gerçek var. helen’in etrafındaki insanlara neler yaşattığını anlamaması tamamen bundan.
ki hep şunu düşündüm, helen’in çoluğu çocuğu yok ama istediği yerde kalacak parası var. istediği tedaviye yetecek parası var. bir de 4. evre terminal kansere parasızlığı ve devlet hastanelerini ekleyin mesela.
bir arkadaşlık, bir yüzleşme, bir ölüm hikayesi bu kadar kısa, sade ve içten yazılabilir. nicola’nın torununun dans gösterisini gizlice izlemeye gidip hüngür hüngür ağlaması nasıl etkili bir andı. helen garner müthiş yazar. roza hakmen de hep aynı ustalıkta çevirmiş.
ve bu alternatif tıpçılar her yerde mi aynı olur ://
daha ileride ise arkadaşlarımızın sağlık problemleriyle ilgilendiğimiz günler gelecek. sıralı ölüm daha kolay kabul ediliyor belki ama kardeşlerimizi, arkadaşlarımızı kaybetmeye başlayacağız.
evet çok can sıkıcı konulardan başladım ama misafir odası ben mahvetti okurken.
3 haftalığına alternatif bir kanser tedavisi için evini arkadaşı helen’a açan nicola’nın çaresizliği, o 3 haftanın her bir gecesinin uzunluğu, nicola’nın sabrı tükenir gibi olduğunda kendini ve nasıl bir arkadaş olduğunu sorgulaması… öyle gerçek ve içten ki.
ağır hastaya bakan herkes bu duyguları bilir. babamın iki büyük ameliyatında ve sonrasında yaşadıklarımı tekrar yaşadım dün gece romanı okurken. hastanede geçirilen gecelerin 1500 saat sürmesi, evdeki işler, o çarşaflar… ki kitapta da hep var o yıkanacak çarşaflar.
burada helen’e kızmak için sebebi de var nicola’nın. saçma sapan bir alternatif tedaviye inanması ki ömrü boyu böyleymiş, daha sonra öğreniyoruz. ama bir insana ölümü kabullenmiyor diye kızmak ne kadar doğru?
yaşlı bencilliği diye de hasta bencilliği diye de bir gerçek var. helen’in etrafındaki insanlara neler yaşattığını anlamaması tamamen bundan.
ki hep şunu düşündüm, helen’in çoluğu çocuğu yok ama istediği yerde kalacak parası var. istediği tedaviye yetecek parası var. bir de 4. evre terminal kansere parasızlığı ve devlet hastanelerini ekleyin mesela.
bir arkadaşlık, bir yüzleşme, bir ölüm hikayesi bu kadar kısa, sade ve içten yazılabilir. nicola’nın torununun dans gösterisini gizlice izlemeye gidip hüngür hüngür ağlaması nasıl etkili bir andı. helen garner müthiş yazar. roza hakmen de hep aynı ustalıkta çevirmiş.
ve bu alternatif tıpçılar her yerde mi aynı olur ://
November 2, 2025
3.5 ⭐️
موضوع کتاب، تکراری و شاید حتی کلیشه‌ایه ولی بین کتاب‌هایی که با این موضوع خوندم، نثرش چنان صریح بود که نزدیک‌ترین فاصله رو به واقعیت داشت. عاری از حس ترحم و شبیه‌ترین به حقیقت.
کتاب بر اساس تجربه‌ی واقعی نویسنده نوشته شده. داستان راجع به نیکولاست که سرطان سطح چهار داره و برای امتحان کردن روش درمانی جدیدی به شهر دیگه‌ای سفر میکنه و مدتی رو در خونه‌ی دوستش میمونه.
همیشه شیوه‌ی مواجهه‌ی آدم‌ها با مرگ برام جالب بوده؛ همونقدر که شیوه‌ی زندگی کردن و چنگ زدن به دلایل‌شون برای زنده موندن و ادامه دادن.
نیکولا نمی‌خواد بپذیره که در وضع وخیمی قرار داره و با تمام توان سعی داره مرگ رو به تعویق بندازه اما نمی‌خواد در زنده ماندن هم باری روی دوش دیگران باشه. در میانه‌ی مرگ و زندگی، درد می‌کشه و پذیرش درد کشیدن مداوم براش راحت‌تر از پذیرش مرگه.
هلن، سعی میکنه در مدتی که پذیرای نیکولاست وضعیت رو به نیکولا نشون بده. از اینکه میبینه نیکولا وضعیت خودش رو جدی نمی‌گیره و مدام به درمان‌های عجیب و اثبات نشده رو میاره، عصبی میشه. احساسات هر دو کرکتر به قدری شفافه که به راحتی درک میشه. نیکولایی که برای زنده موندن تقلا میکنه و راغبه که شیوه‌های درمانی مختلفی با کوچک‌ترین شانس زنده موندن رو امتحان کنه و هلنی که مصممه تا واقعیتِ لاعلاج بودن بیماری دوستش رو به صورتش بکوبه و در واقع هلن هم به نحوی به زندگی خودش چنگ زده.
بیشترین چیزی که راجع به کتاب دوست داشتم، همین میل طبیعی و حقیقی کرکترها برای حفظ زندگی خودشون بود. خبری از ترحم و فداکاری‌های بزرگ نیست. هر دو در حالی که تلاش می‌کنند که از زندگی‌شون محافظت کنند، از دیگری حمایت و پشتیبانی می‌کنند.
موضوع کتاب، تکراری و شاید حتی کلیشه‌ایه ولی بین کتاب‌هایی که با این موضوع خوندم، نثرش چنان صریح بود که نزدیک‌ترین فاصله رو به واقعیت داشت. عاری از حس ترحم و شبیه‌ترین به حقیقت.
کتاب بر اساس تجربه‌ی واقعی نویسنده نوشته شده. داستان راجع به نیکولاست که سرطان سطح چهار داره و برای امتحان کردن روش درمانی جدیدی به شهر دیگه‌ای سفر میکنه و مدتی رو در خونه‌ی دوستش میمونه.
همیشه شیوه‌ی مواجهه‌ی آدم‌ها با مرگ برام جالب بوده؛ همونقدر که شیوه‌ی زندگی کردن و چنگ زدن به دلایل‌شون برای زنده موندن و ادامه دادن.
نیکولا نمی‌خواد بپذیره که در وضع وخیمی قرار داره و با تمام توان سعی داره مرگ رو به تعویق بندازه اما نمی‌خواد در زنده ماندن هم باری روی دوش دیگران باشه. در میانه‌ی مرگ و زندگی، درد می‌کشه و پذیرش درد کشیدن مداوم براش راحت‌تر از پذیرش مرگه.
هلن، سعی میکنه در مدتی که پذیرای نیکولاست وضعیت رو به نیکولا نشون بده. از اینکه میبینه نیکولا وضعیت خودش رو جدی نمی‌گیره و مدام به درمان‌های عجیب و اثبات نشده رو میاره، عصبی میشه. احساسات هر دو کرکتر به قدری شفافه که به راحتی درک میشه. نیکولایی که برای زنده موندن تقلا میکنه و راغبه که شیوه‌های درمانی مختلفی با کوچک‌ترین شانس زنده موندن رو امتحان کنه و هلنی که مصممه تا واقعیتِ لاعلاج بودن بیماری دوستش رو به صورتش بکوبه و در واقع هلن هم به نحوی به زندگی خودش چنگ زده.
بیشترین چیزی که راجع به کتاب دوست داشتم، همین میل طبیعی و حقیقی کرکترها برای حفظ زندگی خودشون بود. خبری از ترحم و فداکاری‌های بزرگ نیست. هر دو در حالی که تلاش می‌کنند که از زندگی‌شون محافظت کنند، از دیگری حمایت و پشتیبانی می‌کنند.
November 12, 2022
This highly interesting and masterfully written book explores friendship and to what extent it entitles and compels those involved.
December 7, 2019
I had always thought that sorrow was the most exhausting of the emotions. Now I knew that it was anger.
Geralmente, fujo a sete pés de livros sobre doenças fatais, mas tinha curiosidade em ler a australiana Helen Garner e em particular este “Quarto de Hóspedes”, amplamente elogiado. Valeu a pena, porque a autora consegue ser empática e compassiva, mas sempre muito sóbria no relato das três semanas em que a carismática Nicola, com um cancro de estádio IV, ficou instalada na casa de uma amiga para se submeter a um tratamento alternativo. Durante esta estadia, a amizade, a paciência e a lealdade são levadas ao limite, fazendo-nos pensar até que ponto conseguimos apoiar estóica e incondicionalmente aqueles que amamos numa fase crítica das suas vidas.
The house, from the moment we pushed open the front door, began to hum with ugly feelings. Anger and fear, rigidly suppressed, sang in the air.
Geralmente, fujo a sete pés de livros sobre doenças fatais, mas tinha curiosidade em ler a australiana Helen Garner e em particular este “Quarto de Hóspedes”, amplamente elogiado. Valeu a pena, porque a autora consegue ser empática e compassiva, mas sempre muito sóbria no relato das três semanas em que a carismática Nicola, com um cancro de estádio IV, ficou instalada na casa de uma amiga para se submeter a um tratamento alternativo. Durante esta estadia, a amizade, a paciência e a lealdade são levadas ao limite, fazendo-nos pensar até que ponto conseguimos apoiar estóica e incondicionalmente aqueles que amamos numa fase crítica das suas vidas.
The house, from the moment we pushed open the front door, began to hum with ugly feelings. Anger and fear, rigidly suppressed, sang in the air.
June 14, 2023
Yes - I like Helen Garner - I read her Everywhere I Look recently. It was a collection of writings from various magazines over a period of about 15 years - and some of the selections were very good, some more literary I suppose than others intended for "light" reading.
I finished the book and started on my review whereby I was surprised to find The Spare Room labelled a 'novel'. I read it as a memoir thinking it was a real story. I took it seriously but, I caught a flash of someone else's review who said "it was very funny..." - in places, I guess, because it's about a woman trying to cope with Stage IV cancer.
Nicola comes to stay with her friend Helen, or Hel as she calls her, who lives in Melbourne. There is a clinic in this city offering alternative cancer therapy. Nicola of course has run the gamut of the conventional treatments and has been told there is no further help.
Yes, if you publish the book as a novel - it does come across as funny - because Helen rages about the incredible pressures Nicola places on her. Here is great scene, where they visit one of Helen's friends, Peggy:
'So,' said Peggy at last, 'How's it all going over there?'
'Well,' Nicola began, leaning forward with a smile so glassy it tinkled. 'It's all going brilliantly. Helen's a wonderfully severe matron. But we've had to get hold of some morphine the last few days. You see, at the Theodore Institute, which is marvellous, they give me a certain intravenous vitamin C treatment every second day.'
She was settling in. Irritated, I tipped my head back and took a proper look at the roses. Quite a few of them were already drying up and drooping. The secateurs lay near me on the windowsill. I grabbed them and made a few furtive passes at the blossoms within reach.
'It does knock one around somewhat,' Nicola went on, 'and I sometimes come home a wee bit under the weather.'
I felt my lips pursing. I stood up and moved away from the table, flexing the clipper as I went. An old wooden ladder was leaning against the shed wall. The little building was wreathed in the climbing roses, and every third flower was ready to be snipped.
'Of course I'll always come through it unscathed. I know it's only the vitamin C savaging the tumours and driving them out. But,' she said, with a gay laugh, 'to my utter astonishment, and to my shame for being so pathetically selfish, I was absolutely and totally unaware that to poor Hel it was a horrendous spectacle.'
Clenching my teeth, I mounted the first three rungs and attacked the upper layers of the plant. POOR HEL. The blossoms fell from my blades in a steady shower of white. The brick paving was strewn with them.
'So, late last night I rang my divine niece Iris, who I'd been staying with in Sydney for the last six months, and asked her if she found the shivering scary- and she said, "What are you talking about, woman? It's terrifying. I was shitting myself every time. You look as if you're about to die.'" Her voice rose and broke in a trill of social laughter.
I forced the safety catch shut on the secateurs and climbed down to the ground. Nicola moved along the bench to make room for me. Peggy filled my cup and pushed it across to me, without meeting my eye.
- one of the most difficult aspects to deal with from Helen's perspective was the lack of pain medication - and I really understand this. Humour aside, there's nothing funny about pain. The honesty of Helen's perspective is an indicator to me, that this probably is a real story - but labelled a novel because Garner in true Garner style is an educator. She wants people/readers to know how demanding and difficult it is for anyone trying to care for a person with a terminal illness. As one professional advises Helen - "Oh, stage IV can go on for years." In this story Helen copes with three weeks. Her resentment and anger towards her friend, however, is a difficult angle to voice - in those three week for example she had no time for her work and no time to spend with her grandchildren - who are next door.
I think that is the real message behind this book - how the sick person can literally suck the life out of all around them. It sounds nasty? Yes, it can be nasty - and that is Garner's point.
When Nicola returns to her home city, Sydney - she calls in her short list of friends and relatives to help with her palliative care - and that's what they do - they each take a shift in the demanding 24 hour care required to keep Nicola comfortable. Helen is justified when she sees the terrible strain on the faces of the others when she turns up to take her turn. (She flies to Sydney.)
It's an important NOVEL to write - from several perspectives. Garner attacks the cowboy outfit of the Theodore Clinic - which fails to recognise that the intense pain in Nicola's shoulder and neck should have been investigated. They charge an exorbitant weekly rate - and Helen tackles her friend on this basis - but Nicola is desperate - her and many like her are unable to accept that there is no cure for what they have. They have to find a way to accept death - and this is the real work that Helen does for Nicola. That would be the second perspective.... It's the biggy - our sophisticated, highly evolved, knowledge based, scientific and technically advanced society does not know how to deal with death.
And if Garner is tackling this subject with humour - good on her. I'll be reading whatever I can find by Helen Garner.
I finished the book and started on my review whereby I was surprised to find The Spare Room labelled a 'novel'. I read it as a memoir thinking it was a real story. I took it seriously but, I caught a flash of someone else's review who said "it was very funny..." - in places, I guess, because it's about a woman trying to cope with Stage IV cancer.
Nicola comes to stay with her friend Helen, or Hel as she calls her, who lives in Melbourne. There is a clinic in this city offering alternative cancer therapy. Nicola of course has run the gamut of the conventional treatments and has been told there is no further help.
Yes, if you publish the book as a novel - it does come across as funny - because Helen rages about the incredible pressures Nicola places on her. Here is great scene, where they visit one of Helen's friends, Peggy:
'So,' said Peggy at last, 'How's it all going over there?'
'Well,' Nicola began, leaning forward with a smile so glassy it tinkled. 'It's all going brilliantly. Helen's a wonderfully severe matron. But we've had to get hold of some morphine the last few days. You see, at the Theodore Institute, which is marvellous, they give me a certain intravenous vitamin C treatment every second day.'
She was settling in. Irritated, I tipped my head back and took a proper look at the roses. Quite a few of them were already drying up and drooping. The secateurs lay near me on the windowsill. I grabbed them and made a few furtive passes at the blossoms within reach.
'It does knock one around somewhat,' Nicola went on, 'and I sometimes come home a wee bit under the weather.'
I felt my lips pursing. I stood up and moved away from the table, flexing the clipper as I went. An old wooden ladder was leaning against the shed wall. The little building was wreathed in the climbing roses, and every third flower was ready to be snipped.
'Of course I'll always come through it unscathed. I know it's only the vitamin C savaging the tumours and driving them out. But,' she said, with a gay laugh, 'to my utter astonishment, and to my shame for being so pathetically selfish, I was absolutely and totally unaware that to poor Hel it was a horrendous spectacle.'
Clenching my teeth, I mounted the first three rungs and attacked the upper layers of the plant. POOR HEL. The blossoms fell from my blades in a steady shower of white. The brick paving was strewn with them.
'So, late last night I rang my divine niece Iris, who I'd been staying with in Sydney for the last six months, and asked her if she found the shivering scary- and she said, "What are you talking about, woman? It's terrifying. I was shitting myself every time. You look as if you're about to die.'" Her voice rose and broke in a trill of social laughter.
I forced the safety catch shut on the secateurs and climbed down to the ground. Nicola moved along the bench to make room for me. Peggy filled my cup and pushed it across to me, without meeting my eye.
- one of the most difficult aspects to deal with from Helen's perspective was the lack of pain medication - and I really understand this. Humour aside, there's nothing funny about pain. The honesty of Helen's perspective is an indicator to me, that this probably is a real story - but labelled a novel because Garner in true Garner style is an educator. She wants people/readers to know how demanding and difficult it is for anyone trying to care for a person with a terminal illness. As one professional advises Helen - "Oh, stage IV can go on for years." In this story Helen copes with three weeks. Her resentment and anger towards her friend, however, is a difficult angle to voice - in those three week for example she had no time for her work and no time to spend with her grandchildren - who are next door.
I think that is the real message behind this book - how the sick person can literally suck the life out of all around them. It sounds nasty? Yes, it can be nasty - and that is Garner's point.
When Nicola returns to her home city, Sydney - she calls in her short list of friends and relatives to help with her palliative care - and that's what they do - they each take a shift in the demanding 24 hour care required to keep Nicola comfortable. Helen is justified when she sees the terrible strain on the faces of the others when she turns up to take her turn. (She flies to Sydney.)
It's an important NOVEL to write - from several perspectives. Garner attacks the cowboy outfit of the Theodore Clinic - which fails to recognise that the intense pain in Nicola's shoulder and neck should have been investigated. They charge an exorbitant weekly rate - and Helen tackles her friend on this basis - but Nicola is desperate - her and many like her are unable to accept that there is no cure for what they have. They have to find a way to accept death - and this is the real work that Helen does for Nicola. That would be the second perspective.... It's the biggy - our sophisticated, highly evolved, knowledge based, scientific and technically advanced society does not know how to deal with death.
And if Garner is tackling this subject with humour - good on her. I'll be reading whatever I can find by Helen Garner.
May 2, 2014
Helen is busy preparing the spare room for her friend Nicola who is coming to stay with her for next three weeks. Helen and Nicola have been friends for the past fifteen years. Nicola has terminal cancer and would like Helen to care for her whist she is undergoing treatment.
Helen arrives in plenty of time to pick Nicola up from the airport, but she wasn't expecting to see her friend look so sick, so sick that she could hardly walk. Of course Nicola insists it was just the flight that has taken its toll on her and that she'll be fine once she has a rest.
Nicola will be attending The Theodore Institute where she she will undergo extensive alternative treatment for her cancer. She is convinced that after three weeks of this alternative treatment she will be cured of her cancer. The alternative treatment is high doses of vitamin C.
Nicola explains to Helen how the treatment works and as far as Helen is concerned it's nothing, but a load of rubbish. Helen knows that there is no miracle cure for the final stages of terminal cancer, but trying to convince Nicola is another matter. After only a few treatments of vitamin C, Nicola starts to feel very sick and is in a lot of pain. She wakes during the night to sopping wet bedding from sweating and chronic pain. Each night Helen helps her change the bedding and tries to comfort her, but her patience are wearing thin knowing this treatment won't work. As Nicola continues with the treatment, Helen becomes more angrier, frustrated and exhausted and she can't seem to make Nicola see that this treatment is not only expensive, but it's all a waste of time. She only wants what's best for her friend and that is to make sure the last bit of time she has left is as pain free as possible.
This may have been a quick read, but it definitely wasn't an easy read at times. A heartbreaking and powerful read about friendship and dying. Well worth reading.
Helen arrives in plenty of time to pick Nicola up from the airport, but she wasn't expecting to see her friend look so sick, so sick that she could hardly walk. Of course Nicola insists it was just the flight that has taken its toll on her and that she'll be fine once she has a rest.
Nicola will be attending The Theodore Institute where she she will undergo extensive alternative treatment for her cancer. She is convinced that after three weeks of this alternative treatment she will be cured of her cancer. The alternative treatment is high doses of vitamin C.
Nicola explains to Helen how the treatment works and as far as Helen is concerned it's nothing, but a load of rubbish. Helen knows that there is no miracle cure for the final stages of terminal cancer, but trying to convince Nicola is another matter. After only a few treatments of vitamin C, Nicola starts to feel very sick and is in a lot of pain. She wakes during the night to sopping wet bedding from sweating and chronic pain. Each night Helen helps her change the bedding and tries to comfort her, but her patience are wearing thin knowing this treatment won't work. As Nicola continues with the treatment, Helen becomes more angrier, frustrated and exhausted and she can't seem to make Nicola see that this treatment is not only expensive, but it's all a waste of time. She only wants what's best for her friend and that is to make sure the last bit of time she has left is as pain free as possible.
This may have been a quick read, but it definitely wasn't an easy read at times. A heartbreaking and powerful read about friendship and dying. Well worth reading.
November 11, 2018
I have mixed feelings about this book. Helen is a terrific writer, so, no problems with that. The story is about two friends, one with end-stage cancer, Nicola, and the other, Helen, takes care of her, for a short while, in her spare room.
The story is a thinly veiled reference to the death of Helen Garner's friend, Jenya Osbourne. Helen watched Jenya hide her fear by always being 'cheery', and insisted that her painful treatments would soon cure her. Of course, Nicola is not exactly Jenya, and 'Helen' is not quite Helen.
Helen Garner said in an interview, "In the past four or five years several people I've been close to and loved have died: both my parents, one of my sisters and three close friends. In four of those deaths I was involved in caring for the person right up to the death knock. I was surprised and appalled to discover that the feelings you have when you're looking after a dying person are not at all the kind of fantasised Florence Nightingale things you might hope for, but there can often be a very dark, semi-conscious struggle and you find in yourself emotions that are ugly and frighten you and fill you with shame. I felt I couldn't be the only person who knew those feelings."
It's difficult to review this book unless you have cared for a dying loved one over a span of time ... and I haven't. Folks who have, feel she hits the nail right on the head in her descriptions of Helen's thoughts, and emotions, as she cares for Nicola. So, I am assuming that my negative reaction to the scenario is due to my lack of life experience in this area. I leave it to the ones who have walked a similar path to put forth their more balanced reviews.
The main issue for me is this ... the story seems to be mainly about how angry Helen is with Nicola because Nicola is choosing to die in a way that Helen doesn’t approve of. I guess that rubbed me the wrong way. Doesn't a person have the right to decide how they wish to die, even if others don't understand? I would like to think that we do. I would hope that folks who truly love us would love us enough to respect us in this ... our last decision.
Jenya Osbourne's sister, Ingrid Davis, wrote to Helen saying, "It seems to be an honour that you chose to write about Jenya . . . you have put it down so squarely and beautifully, that would be what Jenya wanted. . . . Too many people dodge around the issue of dying. . . . What you have said needs to be said, it makes our lives right to know what really happens." She also stated in an interview, "I think it's a brilliant book. We all had such a difficult time and Helen has described it for us. It's hard for me to see anything but the truth in it."
So, who am I to disagree? No one.
3 Stars = I'm glad I read it.
Just because this tickled me, I am including it for your viewing pleasure. :)
In Helen Garner's book The Feel of Steel she discusses the guilty secret of book people everywhere. "I’ve been asking around: I knew I couldn’t be the only person capable of forgetting the contents of a novel only minutes after having closed it. I’ve found that people bluff when they talk about books. They pretend to remember things that they don’t remember at all. Intense anxiety and guilt cluster round the state of having read. Press the memory of a book, and it goes blurry."
The story is a thinly veiled reference to the death of Helen Garner's friend, Jenya Osbourne. Helen watched Jenya hide her fear by always being 'cheery', and insisted that her painful treatments would soon cure her. Of course, Nicola is not exactly Jenya, and 'Helen' is not quite Helen.
Helen Garner said in an interview, "In the past four or five years several people I've been close to and loved have died: both my parents, one of my sisters and three close friends. In four of those deaths I was involved in caring for the person right up to the death knock. I was surprised and appalled to discover that the feelings you have when you're looking after a dying person are not at all the kind of fantasised Florence Nightingale things you might hope for, but there can often be a very dark, semi-conscious struggle and you find in yourself emotions that are ugly and frighten you and fill you with shame. I felt I couldn't be the only person who knew those feelings."
It's difficult to review this book unless you have cared for a dying loved one over a span of time ... and I haven't. Folks who have, feel she hits the nail right on the head in her descriptions of Helen's thoughts, and emotions, as she cares for Nicola. So, I am assuming that my negative reaction to the scenario is due to my lack of life experience in this area. I leave it to the ones who have walked a similar path to put forth their more balanced reviews.
The main issue for me is this ... the story seems to be mainly about how angry Helen is with Nicola because Nicola is choosing to die in a way that Helen doesn’t approve of. I guess that rubbed me the wrong way. Doesn't a person have the right to decide how they wish to die, even if others don't understand? I would like to think that we do. I would hope that folks who truly love us would love us enough to respect us in this ... our last decision.
Jenya Osbourne's sister, Ingrid Davis, wrote to Helen saying, "It seems to be an honour that you chose to write about Jenya . . . you have put it down so squarely and beautifully, that would be what Jenya wanted. . . . Too many people dodge around the issue of dying. . . . What you have said needs to be said, it makes our lives right to know what really happens." She also stated in an interview, "I think it's a brilliant book. We all had such a difficult time and Helen has described it for us. It's hard for me to see anything but the truth in it."
So, who am I to disagree? No one.
3 Stars = I'm glad I read it.
Just because this tickled me, I am including it for your viewing pleasure. :)
In Helen Garner's book The Feel of Steel she discusses the guilty secret of book people everywhere. "I’ve been asking around: I knew I couldn’t be the only person capable of forgetting the contents of a novel only minutes after having closed it. I’ve found that people bluff when they talk about books. They pretend to remember things that they don’t remember at all. Intense anxiety and guilt cluster round the state of having read. Press the memory of a book, and it goes blurry."
March 21, 2025
کتاب رو دوست داشتم . اگرچه توقع پایان زیباتری داشتم ولی بخش آخرش لحن هلن گارنر من رو میخکوب کرد و بعدش فهمیدم ، این بخش ، بخش پایانی کتاب بود …
البته نتیجه گیری رو گذاشت به عهده ی من ، البته اگه بشه نتیجه ای گرفت و یا اصلا نتیجه ای وجود داره !
احساسات مختلفی رو تجربه کردم با خوندنش که قطعا خیلیاش رفته توی نا خودآگاهم و این با ارزش ترین ویژگی این کتاب بود برای من .✨☕️
البته نتیجه گیری رو گذاشت به عهده ی من ، البته اگه بشه نتیجه ای گرفت و یا اصلا نتیجه ای وجود داره !
احساسات مختلفی رو تجربه کردم با خوندنش که قطعا خیلیاش رفته توی نا خودآگاهم و این با ارزش ترین ویژگی این کتاب بود برای من .✨☕️
August 13, 2025
Vannak könyvek, amelyek nagyjából a mindent akarják megírni. És vannak könyvek, amelyek csak egy pici részét a világnak, de azt, ha lehet, tökéletesen. Ez a regény utóbbi csoportba tartozik. Mondhatnánk, hogy betegségregény, mert ugye a rákról szól. De valójában nem is arról. Hanem a barátság szakítószilárdságáról. Arról, hogyan hat a rák a többiekre. Azokra, akik kénytelenek végignézni, mit tesz a kór azzal, akit szeretnek. Hová tűnik az ember, akit mindig örömmel láttunk, akivel élmény volt minden beszélgetés? Miért dől be minden sarlatánnak? Hová tűnt a józan esze, az ítélőképessége? Nem a testi leépülés látványa a legrosszabb - hanem hogy ahová a beteg eljutott, oda nem tudjuk követni. Áll a halál előszobájában, ahová nekünk nincs bejárásunk. És úgy kell tennünk, mintha fognánk a kezét.
Holott csak a levegőt markoljuk.
Holott csak a levegőt markoljuk.
August 2, 2022
Misafir Odası, Helen'ın kanser hastası arkadaşı Nicole'un tedavi için onun yaşadığı şehre,onun evine misafir olarak 3 haftalığına gelmesini konu alıyor. Yazar bir röportajında kanser hastası bir arkadaşının bakımında yardımcı olduğunu söylüyor ve kitabın da bu tecrübeleri üzerine kurulduğunu tahmin ediyorum. Çok yalın, bazen çok ağır fakat çok etkileyici, kolay kolay akıldan silinmeyecek bir kitaptı.
June 21, 2026
Garner beautifully renders the frustration of tongue-biting as you watch a loved one act against their own interests (and get ripped off, to boot). It’s compulsively readable, so you’ll likely be able to knock it over in a single sitting as I did.
My full review of The Spare Room is up now on Keeping Up With The Penguins.
My full review of The Spare Room is up now on Keeping Up With The Penguins.
October 20, 2008
This is a pretty brash and unsentimental look at the nature of friendship under dire strain. Nicola has cancer and comes to stay with Helen while she undergoes alternative treatment, much to Helen's concern. Their differing views on treatment and pain management for Nicola drive Helen to the brink of love for her friend. I loved the honesty of this book. It was a little hard to read at times - the raw honesty of friendship, even in despair. A short book - read in a weekend, and I'm a slow reader.
October 5, 2026
خستگیه رو می‌فهمیدما، ولی بازم اینطوری بودم که واااا.
July 15, 2022
Başlamak için seçtiğiniz ruh haline göre şekillenecek bir kitap; mesela benim için epey melankolik çünkü bundan önce bitirdiğim kitap canımı almıştı bu üzerine tuz biber ekti o açıdan belki doğru zamanı kollamanızı önerebilirim.
Haricinde kısa fakat ziyadesiyle anlamlı bir kitaptı, okuma listenizde değilse şans verebilirsiniz ama okumazsanız kaybınız olmaz diyebilirim. Belki de olur çünkü kime göre neye göre.
Böyle bi’ objektiflik. İdeal yorum nasıl olmamalı tezine ekleyebilirsiniz, all yours.
Haricinde kısa fakat ziyadesiyle anlamlı bir kitaptı, okuma listenizde değilse şans verebilirsiniz ama okumazsanız kaybınız olmaz diyebilirim. Belki de olur çünkü kime göre neye göre.
Böyle bi’ objektiflik. İdeal yorum nasıl olmamalı tezine ekleyebilirsiniz, all yours.
February 21, 2025
This was a beautiful, frustrating read on caregiver burnout.
I need to sit on it, I enjoyed reading it but it was bittersweet and I do not entirely sympathize with the idea that "when you're sick, you go to family."
3.5 stars, may round it up later. Review to come.
I need to sit on it, I enjoyed reading it but it was bittersweet and I do not entirely sympathize with the idea that "when you're sick, you go to family."
3.5 stars, may round it up later. Review to come.
October 17, 2026
I only have a few words about this short and enthralling novel about friendship that in some ways reminded me of The Friendby Sigrid Nunez—even though they’re both very different books, there’s something about care and friendship that connects them for me.
A woman in Melbourne prepares her spare room to temporarily host her friend who is battling cancer and needs to receive treatments at a nearby facility. She soon learns it is more than she expected, and layers unfold on the page as the novel explores the interior of a friendship tested by time, illness, fear, exhaustion, and misconceptions.
I was intrigued by how the prose is both soft and harsh, the story both brutal and fragile. This is a quiet page-turner, an examination of the lives we lead and where we could each find ourselves.
A woman in Melbourne prepares her spare room to temporarily host her friend who is battling cancer and needs to receive treatments at a nearby facility. She soon learns it is more than she expected, and layers unfold on the page as the novel explores the interior of a friendship tested by time, illness, fear, exhaustion, and misconceptions.
I could have poured out a thousand flattering protests, but her back was bolt upright, her hands were folded, and in profile she looked so dignified that it would have been impertinent to try to comfort her. So I sat beside her on the grass and followed her gaze; and the lake, the lawn, the elms, the sailing flat-bottomed clouds, and the summer day itself darkened and disintegrated before our eyes.
I was intrigued by how the prose is both soft and harsh, the story both brutal and fragile. This is a quiet page-turner, an examination of the lives we lead and where we could each find ourselves.
July 23, 2021
Helen Garner’s The Spare Room, loosely based on the death of one of Garner’s friends, is an unflinchingly honest narrative about an extremely challenging situation. Helen and her close friend, Nicola, struggle to maintain a friendship while Nicola undergoes experimental therapy for terminal cancer.
The narrative unfolds from Helen’s perspective as she prepares her spare room to receive Nicola. She approaches the task of care-giving with sympathy and compassion. She bathes Nicola, feeds her, goes with her to the doctor, and changes her bed sheets 2-3 times a day as needed. All the while, she cringes at the alternative treatments that leave Nicola completely debilitated, weakened to the point she can barely move, unable to control her bodily functions, shivering profusely, and suffering from unrelenting pain. Nicola persists in continuing with the treatment. Her cheery and indomitable conviction that the treatment will cure her of cancer eventually leads to a thoroughly exhausted Helen angrily confronting her.
The novel explores some very difficult issues. How does one deal with a dying friend who refuses to accept the inevitable? Nicola is willing to endure all manner of painful alternative treatments, convinced she will be cured. She expects Helen to believe in these cures and to nurse her while undergoing the treatment. While she has a right to choose her path for treatment, she has no right to impose the harrowing consequences of her choice on friends or family who are not professional care-givers. Helen runs herself ragged taking care of Nicola, witnesses her struggle with outlandish treatments that cause her incredible pain, and tolerates her stubborn refusal to see qualified medical professionals. She struggles with feelings of rage, guilt, and tenderness, feelings which leave her mentally and physically drained. We witness her increasing frustration and sense of helplessness. On the one hand, she wants to support her friend; on the other, she wants to shake some sense into her.
The novel skillfully portrays the contrasting worlds of a frustrated, guilt-ridden Helen with the cheery, desperate, living-in-denial spirit of Nicola. The writing is sharp, clear, and effective. It is a quick read but not an easy one due to its realistic treatment of the challenges that go with witnessing and caring for a loved one suffering from a terminal illness.
My book reviews are also available at www.tamaraaghajaffar.com
The narrative unfolds from Helen’s perspective as she prepares her spare room to receive Nicola. She approaches the task of care-giving with sympathy and compassion. She bathes Nicola, feeds her, goes with her to the doctor, and changes her bed sheets 2-3 times a day as needed. All the while, she cringes at the alternative treatments that leave Nicola completely debilitated, weakened to the point she can barely move, unable to control her bodily functions, shivering profusely, and suffering from unrelenting pain. Nicola persists in continuing with the treatment. Her cheery and indomitable conviction that the treatment will cure her of cancer eventually leads to a thoroughly exhausted Helen angrily confronting her.
The novel explores some very difficult issues. How does one deal with a dying friend who refuses to accept the inevitable? Nicola is willing to endure all manner of painful alternative treatments, convinced she will be cured. She expects Helen to believe in these cures and to nurse her while undergoing the treatment. While she has a right to choose her path for treatment, she has no right to impose the harrowing consequences of her choice on friends or family who are not professional care-givers. Helen runs herself ragged taking care of Nicola, witnesses her struggle with outlandish treatments that cause her incredible pain, and tolerates her stubborn refusal to see qualified medical professionals. She struggles with feelings of rage, guilt, and tenderness, feelings which leave her mentally and physically drained. We witness her increasing frustration and sense of helplessness. On the one hand, she wants to support her friend; on the other, she wants to shake some sense into her.
The novel skillfully portrays the contrasting worlds of a frustrated, guilt-ridden Helen with the cheery, desperate, living-in-denial spirit of Nicola. The writing is sharp, clear, and effective. It is a quick read but not an easy one due to its realistic treatment of the challenges that go with witnessing and caring for a loved one suffering from a terminal illness.
My book reviews are also available at www.tamaraaghajaffar.com
March 30, 2020
This is based (or at least inspired by) a situation (or several) that Garner found herself in: caring for friends with terminal cancer. The narrator in the book is called Helen, and the style was refreshingly frank, personal, real. Helen's friend, Nicola comes to stay with her in Melbourne in order to have some alternative treatments for the terminal cancer she is facing. But Nicola is in denial both about the terminal nature of her cancer, and the crank therapies she is undergoing. Helen hopes (as maybe we all would hope) that she can help her friend, care for her, but the difficulties of broken nights and different opinions become apparent quickly. Interesting to read a book from the point of view of the carer.
April 1, 2025
این بیشتر واسم شبیه این بود که دارم دفترخاطرات کسیو میخونم. جزییات خیلی زیادی داشت همین باعث میشد بتونم بیشتر با شخصیتها ارتباط بگیرم.خیلی باعث شد فکرم درگیر بشه.دوست هلن از مرگ میترسید چون بنظرش هنوز زندگی نکرده بود و زندگیشو و استعدادهاشو هدر داده بود همین باعث شده بود نتونه با مرگش کنار بیاد و بفهمه بزودی میمره.صادقانه منم بهم ریختم، ایا میتونم الان با مرگم کنار بیام؟نه! چون بنظر خودمم خیلی چیزا مونده تو زندگی باید بهشون برسم یا تجربه کنم. سوال اینجاست ایا کسی میتونه با مرگش کنار بیاد؟ چه زمانی انسان آماده میشه که به پیشواز مرگ بره؟ کی به این نتیجه میرسه که زندگیشو هدر نداده و انتخابهای خوبی داشته تو زندگی؟؟
****
در کل این کتاب به مثابه این میمونه که دارید دفترخاطرات یکیو میخونید که از احساساتش میگه و چطوری وقایع میبینه.
****
در کل این کتاب به مثابه این میمونه که دارید دفترخاطرات یکیو میخونید که از احساساتش میگه و چطوری وقایع میبینه.
April 3, 2018
I really enjoyed a collection of Helen Garner's short stories which I read relatively recently, and looked forward to giving her novel, The Spare Room, a go. Thoughtful and meditative, with a definite power, this novel took my breath away as it reached its end. Garner's beautiful writing is so detailed in its depictions, and the narrative voice immediately felt authentic. Spare Room is a very human portrayal of what it means to live with cancer, and what it is like to witness a loved one suffering with the disease. Garner demonstrates the immense difficulty about being someone's primary carer in attentive and tightly sculpted prose. A new favourite, certainly.
April 11, 2008
A beautiful book. I saw Helen interviewed last night at Gleebooks - it was great to be in this packed room and see her in person. It's a quick but very emotional read. I'm going to read it again and will do a better review. I read it in one sitting.... the story was about death but was so alive....
Read
February 17, 2009Award winning writer Helen Garner returns to fiction after 15 years to write this short, intense and beautiful novel about friendship and dying. It seems intimately personal since the narrator is also named Helen, and the emotions are so raw and powerful. The premise--Helen agrees to let her friend stay with her for 3 weeks while she undergoes an alternative cancer therapy in Melbourne (where Helen lives). What she didn't know was just how very sick her friend is. Both women are in their 60s and on their own, and it becomes a struggle between needing help and asking for it, wanting to help but knowing what personal limits there are, and the boundaries of friendship and love. The issue of truth comes up again and again--facing the truth of an illness, the realities of a moment, and the sum of a life. This is a quick read, but not an easy one.
Jackie
Jackie
August 12, 2014
Oh good grief! The melodrama! I have never written a review before but this book has me so cranky at 5am that I feel compelled to.
I must be a dreadful person because what despicable characters I found these two women. I cannot imagine ever taking in nor staying with someone in their respective circumstances. Take some freakin personal responsibility for your life situation instead of bombarding your supposed loved-ones with your selfish emotions!! Well written or not I am so pleased these are not real humans I know or I would smash their heads together.
I recognise that the purpose of fiction is often to stir the emotions but I didn't especially need these ones stirred at the moment. Thanks a lot book club lol!
Rant over. Time to go think some happy thoughts....
I must be a dreadful person because what despicable characters I found these two women. I cannot imagine ever taking in nor staying with someone in their respective circumstances. Take some freakin personal responsibility for your life situation instead of bombarding your supposed loved-ones with your selfish emotions!! Well written or not I am so pleased these are not real humans I know or I would smash their heads together.
I recognise that the purpose of fiction is often to stir the emotions but I didn't especially need these ones stirred at the moment. Thanks a lot book club lol!
Rant over. Time to go think some happy thoughts....
June 30, 2009
A woman with cancer, Nicola, comes to stay with her friend, Helen, for a few weeks. She attends alternative therapy sessions - Vitamin C, apricot pits, 'cupping' - to no avail. The description of pain and clearing up the bedsheets etc is acute and harrowing but clear eyed and without sentiment. It is billed as a novel, but the main character besides being called Helen is also a writer, and it reads like non fiction. Relief comes in the form of the child next door who cuts through the adults' talk with her innocent brutality. A quick, depressing, sobering, necessary read.
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