3 stars (not because of poor writing but because it’s just not fully to my tastes)
A very creative take on vampires with an a**hole-ish yet charming MC as narrator. The writing is good, the story is well constructed & intellectually engaged me, yet I’m not 100% certain I enjoyed the overall reading experience? Probably it’s just not to my tastes. This is a dark story involving torture & lots of non- & dubiously consensual sex (see my copious thoughts on this below). Neither is gratuitous or glamorized (& I mean both things are there for narrative reasons), but imvho this book is not for everyone.
[What I liked:]
•Lots of points for creativity. There are so many tired vampire/undead tropes that result in many unmemorable books in this genre, & I think this writer told a decently fresh story.
•I appreciate what this book set out to do; I did get something out of reading it, & I don’t regret having read it. First off, I appreciate the nuanced way difficult topics such as non-con/dub-con & abusive relationship dynamics were handled. And also I appreciate how no character in this is purely good, innocent, or evil (minus a few pretty solidly evil ones).
•Sean is a great character with a strong voice. Is he a vain, oblivious, aimless, & self-centered jerk? Pretty much. Does he have a satisfying character growth arc? To some extent. Did I appreciate his flawed human nature & cynical wit, & did I empathize with his hang ups & uncertainties? Heck yes. He made for a great MC, imo.
•Farjeon is a fascinating, twisted, sometimes sympathetic, & layered character. I loved Rufus, his relationship with Sean especially. Taylor could have used more character development, but was likable enough. There are like zero women characters who aren’t bit-part afterthoughts (& only two of those), but I can’t really complain since this story is about a gay man at an all-men’s college.
•The uncertainty about which characters you can trust, what exactly is going on, who’s being manipulative, what everyone’s (besides the MC’s) motivations are, how things will turn out, & the turmoil of everyone’s fluctuating emotional conflicts & struggles with guilt, is well done. It kept me in a state of uneasy doubt up til the end, along with Sean. I could really feel & engage with his emotional journey.
[What I didn’t like as much:]
•I’m still a bit confused about what happened to Richard when he died/transformed; what caused it? The possibly-magical stone? How & why? I would’ve liked more explanation about that.
•The ending was a bit too vague for my tastes. I mean it’s all hinted at, it’s so subtle, & I’m 80% sure I understood what Sean’s decision was & maybe 60% why he chose it, but I wish I knew for sure.
•I’m still not clear on Aegis, it’s origins & motivations as an organization, who founded it & who’s involved, how it found out about St. Thad’s, etc. I think fleshing that out a bit more would’ve added to the story.
•Okay, I will now attempt to address the large amounts of dub-con & non-con sex. This very long bullet point is more of an in-depth content warning than a quibble with the quality of the writing. There is plenty of consensual sex in this book. There is also plenty of questionably or clearly not-okay sex. It made me all sorts of uncomfortable, which was rather the point I guess.
Tbf, the writer made it clear that characters knew it wasn’t consensual or wasn’t consensual enough, so he wasn’t presenting dub-con & r*pe as romantic or normalized, which is good & important. And I get why it was included. A lot of this book deals with manipulation & unhealthy power dynamics, & manipulative sex is part of that, thematically, in a central way to the story.
So what specifically was dub-con/non-con? There are some scenes of straight up r*pe by someone who’s basically a serial killer. There are some scenes of pure torture & sexual abuse by a professional torturer. But for the most part as far as the dub-con is concerned, it mainly involved scenes where sexual interaction started off mutually consensual but then crossed the line into manipulation, or sometimes straight up abuse.
This took different forms: pressuring someone into acts they are uncomfortable with; taking one’s own pleasure at the expense of one’s partner’s pain or serious bodily/psychological harm; withholding info from a partner that would influence their decision to consent, if known; coercing someone into witnessing disturbing sex acts; & using manipulation—perhaps even legit mind control—to coerce someone into sex they are clearly conflicted about having. Some pretty f*cked up stuff, all in all. So basically, proceed at your own risk & discretion.
I’d be very interested to hear other readers’ perspectives on this aspect of the book. I readily acknowledge my own interpretation of this content is shaped by my personal experiences with sex, sexual assault, abusive relationship dynamics, etc.
CW: murder, extreme physical & psychological torture, sexual assault, dub-con, external & internalized homophobia, body image issues, abusive relationship dynamics of various sorts, power/status imbalances in romantic & sexual relationships, r*pe
[I received an ARC ebook copy from NetGalley in exchange for my honest review. Thank you for the book!]