I Was Here Lib/E

by Rachel Kadish

In a working-class town, the abuse of a young girl is hushed up by a community more interested in civility than justice. Twenty years later, a series of obscene texts revives that old injustice and ten seemingly unconnected lives are pulled into an intricate and dangerous swerve toward tragedy.

This heart-stopping tale unfolds at the pace of a thriller, but its exquisite tension is generated by the precision of its character portraits. Just pages in, the anticipation is already deliciously unbearable—we're terrified for sweet, damaged Charlotte because she is so nakedly there on the page, a child-woman made vulnerable by her innocence. Already we sense the mounting inevitability of an extraordinary show-down with the chilling Phil Leone, and this sense only deepens with each installment, as more characters thrum to life, all equally naked in their wanting and fearing.

It is, without a doubt, a page-turner, but it is also a profound look at human fragility, the momentum of evil, and the bravery required for kindness. This book is both unusually kind and unusually brave. It is also an unusually good read, marrying the depth and beauty of literary fiction to the adrenaline rush of a thriller.

Currently being serialized on Rooster. www.readrooster.com

Genres: Fiction, Thriller, Novels

Audio CD

First published March 1, 2014

About the author

I often begin writing when something is bothering me. Years ago, I was thinking about Virginia Woolf’s question: what if Shakespeare had had an equally talented sister?
Woolf’s answer: She died without writing a word.
What, I wondered, would it take for a woman of that era, with that kind of capacious intelligence, not to die without writing a word?
For one thing, she’d have to be a genius at breaking rules.
My novel The Weight of Ink reaches back in time to ask the question: what does it take for a woman not to be defeated when everything around her is telling her to sit down and mind her manners? I started writing with two characters in mind, both women who don’t mind their manners: a contemporary historian named Helen Watt and a seventeenth century Inquisition refugee named Ester Velasquez. It’s been a delight working on their story.
The Weight of Ink is my third novel, but I’ve also written two other novels and one novella, plus a few dozen essays and stories. Whether I’m writing fiction or nonfiction, I put words to paper because it's my way of metabolizing life. To paraphrase Henry James: I don't really know what I think until I see what I say.
Thanks for visiting this page, and for your interest in books.

Reviews

[Aparnakmianogmail.com · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sensitive, suspenseful, and engaging portrayal of the relationships between people in a small town. This is a serial on Rooster, but I read the whole book in one day; it was so hard to put down (my phone!). The characters are vivid and the treatment is sympathetic, even towards people who may not deserve such a light touch. The ability to represent the perspectives of so many different characters, yet integrate all the loose threads in a natural way, is very difficult, especially in such a short format. What I loved most was the care and concern for these characters shown by Kadish; that's what makes them so real and memorable. The writing is superb, and deft, and readable. Highly recommended.

[Tova Mirvis · Rating 5 out of 5]

I Was Here is a riveting read. Rachel Kadish weaves in and out of her different characters' minds, laying bare their secrets and makes us feel for all of them. I couldn't stop thinking about this novella long after I read it.

[Jennifer · Rating 3 out of 5]

I have a hard time rating this audiobook, but I believe I would give it a 3.5 (if we could do half stars). It was such a quick book. I was engaged the entire time, but I found myself getting confused as to who was speaking as the sections weren’t “labeled” in the audio chapters (I wonder if they are in the book). The story was captivating and told in a way that was unrelenting.

[Dale Levy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Different from other Rachel books

Usually Rachel’s storytelling is in the past, contemplating the future, showing the characters in a role in the past, and the story jaunts here and there while we wonder what’s going on, and eagerly follow it along, getting one ahaha after another.
This story is more a lumbering on...not good or bad, just a dutifully lumbering story. But I suppose that is in the persona of the main character...she is slow and right on point as well.
The characters of all involved are artfully spot on as well...One I particularly loved was sister of Erik....I had the feeling that she was a victim, but she couldn’t tell us.....

[Mark Miano · Rating 5 out of 5]

Rachel Kadish is the author of one of my favorite books of all time, THE WEIGHT OF INK. I first encountered this shorter work when it was serialized on the Rooster app. As always, Kadish’s prose is lyrical and precise, and her characters feel deeply lived-in. They are people you come to know, understand, and care about deeply. This is a beautiful piece of work, and a reminder of why Kadish is one of my favorite writers.

[Jeremy · Rating 5 out of 5]

So taut and tense that I literally had to put it down and breathe several times. Not just a psychological thriller, but a moving exploration of redemption and forgiveness, as well as the desperate human search for identity and the fear and beauty of being naked before the world. A truly profound page-turner!

[Livia · Rating 5 out of 5]

Beautifully written.

Beautifully written, slowly developing the characters with an engrossing plot layering and weaving all with touching emotion and understanding. Ms. Kadish has done it again.

[Carrie Santos · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have read Rachel Kadish's other books and this is a departure told from the perspective of characters not in her other books. I appreciated the complex view of women and our dilemmas, women from a wide range of society.

[Betty Senger · Rating 1 out of 5]

Sad

This is the saddest book I've ever read! Dark. Memories Haunting... Never letting go of this poor girl. It was hard to read.

[Jennifer · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5 rounded up

[Gabriella Gricius · Rating 3 out of 5]

Why Read: I have to credit my choice in this book to the amazing podcast of Book Riot (which you must find and listen to at least one episode because it’s incredible), and the app they recommended: Read Rooster. Although I ended up not liking this book as much as I thought I would and hoped to – I’m glad I got to read a realistic fiction book.

Review: As much as I want to enjoy realistic fiction, it’s hard to enjoy reading when all the topic discusses is the sad life of different individuals trapped in situations they can’t escape. That, for me, is the issue of realistic fiction and really why I couldn’t give this book more than a 3.

I can’t argue with character development, and I’m a sucker for well-developed ones. The focuses in ‘I Was Here’ are all superbly developed and as sad I as I became every time I opened up the book – I was interested in how their miserable lives evolved next. What I thought was chiefly good was the description of Charlotte and the way her outlook of the world is so fundamentally different from everyone else’s. Is that because she works with children? Is it because she had an upbringing, which changed her internally?

The plot… I can argue with a bit more. The switches between past and present often perplexed me and I was left floundering which time period I was in, or which characters I should be paying attention to. While that did subside after reading through the entire book, it should bother me as a reader. However, it was the development of other characters that caught my attention. Specifically Pauline, she really was one of my favorite parts about the book because I could see the changes in her lifestyle and in her thinking.

So end result? You’ve probably gathered I didn’t enjoy the book all that much – but that’s the story with tales, which leave a slightly bitter taste in your mouth. But for character development particularly – there has not been another book lately, which I’ve seen dominate the idea of development in two time periods with better success.

Rating: 3/5 Stars

[Cole · Rating 3 out of 5]

The writing in this book is very good, the author has an eloquent way of describing the way the characters feel. When I sat down to read it, I liked what I was reading. The problem was when I put it down and walked away, I didn't feel the need to go back to it. I think the problem was that there were so many characters that were narrating, everything felt disconnected. Some parts had the narrator change, and it was a paragraph or two before you were told who it was. It left me a little frustrated. If you want to move characters so often, don't hide it from me.

Also, the part that I expected to be a big deal didn't live up to the build-up. You're waiting for this to happen, most of the book is the anxiety over this event, and once you get there, it's over before you know it. Not a lot of detail is given either.

There's a lot of good things about this book; the writing is beautiful, the characters are ones you can empathize with. I think that the scope needed to be narrowed. I'm thinking back and there really was very little need to have Paul narrate at all; he didn't provide much to the overall story. And although Pauline did have a large story, I don't think her character provided much either. At the end we're left with Pauline's story just stuck in nothingness.

I think the end of the book said that there were 9 narrators. That left me confused as to who was narrating at the time, and didn't let you get into the head of most of the characters. I think the same story could be told from fewer viewpoints and still be a compelling read, with less confusion and a better pace.

[Jordanna East · Rating 2 out of 5]

I read this in two days - but not because it was un-put-down-able. I read it in two days because I wanted to get it over with. The entire story was mostly narrative, with not much happening in the here and now. Though the novel was written in the past tense, much of what was described actually happened in the past, making the whole book feel like an info-dump. There wasn't much happening in terms of dialogue, either, with the reader taken into the minds of several characters and exposed to inner monologues that did little to further the plot (As a matter of fact, there wasn't much a plot.). As a result of all this, the book just dragged on and on. And don't even get me started on the main character. I finally read a book featuring a flawed female character, and every other paragraph mentions her weight in a non-flattering way, as though someone's weight defines them. Such a disappointing read on so many levels.

[Jan Rivkin · Rating 5 out of 5]

I Was Here delivers both a fast-paced plot and fascinating, well-developed characters. The author achieves this rare combination by writing beautifully and efficiently; not a word is superfluous. The novella was originally released in serialized form, but I found the plot so riveting that I couldn’t stop reading at the intended break points. The ending stayed with me, in a positive sense, long after I finished reading the novella. Highly recommended to anyone who wants to reflect--as the title suggests--on the many ways that one person can be present in another’s life, for evil or for good.

[Kathryn E Manson · Rating 3 out of 5]

Loved the concept.......

Loved the concept and the end message. The story was a bit hard to read with it's back and forth between different people and their perspective. In the first half of the book there was no way to tell who was who and why they were included in this book. It was not a bad story it just needed a little rearranging

[Kimberly · Rating 3 out of 5]

I felt that this book was pretty dark and found myself in a forlorn mood after reading it until I finished. I also thought the ending was lacking- it just didn't feel complete. However, it was a book that was difficult to put down.

[Lori · Rating 3 out of 5]

Pretty interesting. I felt like it was a bit too sentimental. Writing style was fine but nothing impressive. I dunno. I read it because it was the Rooster book of the month, and the "classical" option didn't interest me. Wouldn't have picked it up otherwise.

[David De graaf · Rating 5 out of 5]

It is a very suspenseful read. The writing is exquisite and manages to make people's thoughts almost visible. Yes, dark, and yes, dramatic, but not quite a thriller. A fantastic first offering for Rooster. IF this doesn't pull people in, I don't know what will.

[Lacy Arnett Mayberry · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don't know why novellas aren't more of a thing. They're short enough to breeze through in a few days and have the space to mine a bit deeper and wider than a traditional short story. Anyway, LOVED this book: a heart-punching powerhouse I couldn't put down.

[Frances · Rating 3 out of 5]

The first book presented by Rooster, a new mobile reading service.

[Hunter · Rating 5 out of 5]

Beautifully written. Morose but painfully realistic characterisation.

[Rachel · Rating 5 out of 5]

First reading this on Rooster, I became impatient with having to wait to find out what happens next. The characters are beautifully developed and the story is gripping.

[Alice Tam · Rating 2 out of 5]

I read this while trying out Rooster. It just took too long to develop storylines and characters. I ended up hating the main character.

[Michaelann · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loved the characters, beautifully written.

[Kathy Cowie · Rating 3 out of 5]

review to follow