The Egg Man

by Carlton Mellick III

It is a survival of the fittest world where humans reproduce like insects, children are the property of corporations, and having a ten-foot tall brain is a grotesque sexual fetish. Lincoln has just been released into the world by the Georges Organization, a corporation that raises creative types. A Smell, he has little prospect of succeeding as a visual artist. But after he moves into the Henry Building, he meets Luci, the weird and grimy girl who lives across the hall. She is a Sight. She is also the most disgusting woman Lincoln has ever met. Little does he know, she will soon become his muse. Now Luci's boyfriend is threatening to kill Lincoln, two rival corporations are preparing for war, and Luci is dragging him along to discover the truth about the mysterious egg man who lives next door. Only the strongest will survive in this tale of individuality, love, and mutilation. The Egg Man is like an Orwellian version of Eraserhead and The Tenant filtered through Richard Linklater's rotoscope animation. You will not find a weirder or grittier dystopian novel anywhere.

Genres: Bizarro Fiction, Fiction, Horror, Science Fiction, Dystopia

168 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2008

About the author

Carlton Mellick III (July 2, 1977, Phoenix, Arizona) is an American author currently residing in Portland, Oregon. He calls his style of writing "avant-punk," and is currently one of the leading authors in the recent 'Bizarro' movement in underground literature[citation needed] with Steve Aylett, Chris Genoa and D. Harlan Wilson.

Mellick's work has been described as a combination of trashy schlock sci-fi/horror and postmodern literary art. His novels explore surreal versions of earth in contemporary society and imagined futures, commonly focusing on social absurdities and satire.

Carlton Mellick III started writing at the age of ten and completed twelve novels by the age of eighteen. Only one of these early novels, "Electric Jesus Corpse", ever made it to print.

He is best known for his first novel Satan Burger and its sequel Punk Land. Satan Burger was translated into Russian and published by Ultra Culture in 2005. It was part of a four book series called Brave New World, which also featured Virtual Light by William Gibson, City Come A Walkin by John Shirley, and Tea from an Empty Cup by Pat Cadigan.

In the late 90's, he formed a collective for offbeat authors which included D. Harlan Wilson, Kevin L. Donihe, Vincent Sakowski, among others, and the publishing company Eraserhead Press. This scene evolved into the Bizarro fiction movement in 2005.

In addition to writing, Mellick is an artist and musician.

Reviews

[Misty Marie Harms · Rating 3 out of 5]

Somewhere in another timeline children are the property of corporations. Our man character, Lincoln , has just been released into the world to find his way. He is Smell and a budding artist. Lincoln is having a hard time with painting because who smells a canvas? He meets the girl across the hall, Luci, who is Sight and apparently is lacking in cleanliness. Small problem. Luci has a boyfriend and he is willing to kill for her. It all comes to head one day when two rival corporations are preparing for a rumble in the streets. Finger snapping, hand jiving, who's bad. Lincoln finds himself in his neighbor's apartment and discovers The Egg Man, Orwellian version of Eraserhead and The Tenant filtered through Richard Linklater's rotoscope animation.

If you have read all that then you are scratching your head wondering wtf did I just read. Don't feel bad I had the same reaction. I still don't understand it weeks later. My only complaint is I need Mellick to lower his prices on his short novels. You killing me smalls.....

[Peter Topside · Rating 3 out of 5]

Welp…I’m out at 48%. Carlton Mellick chose a very specific writing style here, mostly void of punctuation. Everything just sort of runs into itself and there is no set dialogue, only like overviews from a different perspective of what is being spoken. That made everything very hard for me to focus. And the content is really above and beyond the normal Mellick fare. A woman giving birth to a litter of large fly larvae, some really strange sex scenes, and just a whole lot if stuff to make your brains melt out your ears. As a big fan of Carlton Mellick, I love almost all of his works. He is stupid creative and just a blast to read. But this one was too much for me. And probably would be for even die hard science fiction lovers, too.

[Eric Hendrixson · Rating 5 out of 5]

So far, this is my favorite CM3 book. It's not as wild as Warrior Wolf Women of the Wasteland. It's not as silly as Morbidly Obese Ninja. It's not as nightmarish as Baby Jesus Butt Plug. However, it has an emotional component that works exceptionally well.

The protagonist of this story is essentially an orphan living in a dystopia in which all people are orphans adopted by some corporation or another. He is raised to be an artist, but he is simply not a visual learner. Released from the academy into the world to create his masterpiece or lose his grant, he creates an entirely new style of art. However, does the world want his art? Does he want the world? And if he succeeds in creating his vision (or smell, as the case may be), will he or the world still be around to enjoy it?

This novel also works particularly well on a structural level as certain themes and images appear in the story to resurface later.

[Paul (Life In The Slow Lane) · Rating 2 out of 5]

Gives "scratch and sniff" a whole new meaning.

Lincoln is an artist, but his main sense is his sense of smell. So he incorporates odours into his art. For some reason, Lincoln was born as a fly and has dragonfly wings.

I think Carlton Mellick was having an off day when he wrote this, and leaving out most of the punctuation, especially the inverted commas, was very annoying. This story isn't Bizarro; it's just plain silly.

[Leila Anani · Rating 4 out of 5]

Put Orwell and Kafka into a blender with Eraserhead, The Tenant and a Scanner Darkly, sprinkle with Bizarro Fiction dust and you get: Egg Man.

It's set in an dystopian future where corporations rule: McDonalds, OCM, IBM, Toyota... Women give birth to flying swarms in the streets. The surviving flying fetuses are netted by corporations and reared in their daycare centres; taught the language and skills of the corporation. Our protagonist Lincoln was born into the Georges Organization who produce artists. He's issued an apartment and art supplies and told to create. However if he fails to be commercially successful the company will cut him off and he will be destitute. Lincoln has the odds stacked against him because he is a "smell" (smell being his dominant sense) and no other smell has been a successful artist, they are all sights or feels. He meets some of the quirky tenants in his building, slut Luci who becomes his lover and muse, paranoid drug dealer Squik and the mysterious Egg Man next door who has a brain so large he can't move.

As with most CM3 novels, the scope of imagination is staggering. The vision of the future here is terrifying and I love the insect connection and the allegory of humans as flies. Because Lincoln is a smell the writing focuses on the olfactory senses - so not only do you see this dystopian future, you smell it in all its fetid, bloody glory. I also love the idea of Heaven Inc. giving people VR afterlives trapped in these giant brains. Super weird and super imaginative, Egg Man, while not my favourite, is a great example of Bizarro Fiction.

[Andrew Stone · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is almost perfect. I loved Lincoln, the protagonist, and his journey as an artist. His muse, Luci, while disgusting, is lovely too. They way children are raised by corporations is a brilliant commentary on American society. And like all of CM3s books, The Egg Man is totally insane from start to finish. The back cover describes it, among other things, as a dystopian Eraserhead, and that descriptor is spot on.

The only drawback about this book is the lack of dialogue tags because, at times, it makes following the dialogue hard to follow.

Overall, for fans of strange dystopian futures, CM3, and early David Lynch, this book is a must read.

[Paige Ray · Rating 4 out of 5]

This one was far darker than previous Mellick’s I’ve read. The ending was so bleak. 😳

We also don’t encounter the egg man until a little more than half way through this book but the story really isn’t about him. He plays a role but this story really focuses on our MMC, Lincoln and his downfall.

This is definitely more on the sci-fi scale of things and vivid imagery of the smells and sights in this one. Definitely not for the faint of heart. I was gagging during certain parts.

I loved how different this one was compared to previous works I’ve read from Mellick. It definitely took me by surprise and went an entirely different direction than I expected.

[Teresa · Rating 5 out of 5]

Out of all the CMIII books I've read (not too, too many, I'll admit), this was my favorite. Yes, it was gritty and noir-ish and all that, but not like, say Grudge Punk. It was in a (somehow) more believable world. The fact that Carlton makes it a point not to use profanity in excess really stood out to me in this one. I could never describe such a shitty world without the use of severe profanity.

The characteristic short 'bits' that make up each chapter create a piece that is super easy to set down, then pick up again. I absolutely love that 'feature' in books, and CMIII is known for that gift, too. Its hard to believe you can paint such a realistic, detailed place, and do so in such easily-digestible chunks.

What really caught me, however, was the 'author's note.' I really appreciate a little backstory, if you will, and I found myself thinking again and again on the statement that this book is 'one of my most autobiographical books to date.' I found myself wondering if "Luci" as modeled from a real chick, perhaps one that really inspired the author through heartache and cruelty. But it wasn't just that statement that caught my eye. Carlton explained that he likes to write his books after the 'what-if' game. You know, like "What if people could choose to have a 'mega-brain' that can store souls and shit?," or "What if women gave birth to swarms of babies, each with a set of their own wings, and they must survive on their own for the first 6 months?" You'll find the answers to these questions, plus some insight into the author's inner workings in this one.

Okay, so that's the writer-y stuff I have to say about this piece...as for plot line? Well, it was engaging, and fast paced, and detailed, and all that other good shit great books are supposed to be. Still, the world he described was nothing short of captivating. Imagine a world, if you will, in which children are raised by companies, such as McDonald's and Toyota. They teach these children the company 'language,' and hopefully 'common' language as well (the language everyone, despite their personal company enslavement, should speak). Toyota is too cheap and uncaring to teach their slaves 'common,' so they cannot communicate with anyone that doesn't work for Toyota. Pretty fuckin' screwy, huh? But we're just scratching the surface on weirdness. 'Babies' are born in a singular, painful act of emitting a swarm of 'fetus flies' from your vagina. Every single sperm becomes a baby, so they can't all survive. Most of the little flies die within 24 hours; the ones that don't struggle to make it 6 months, and only a very, very few actually do. If you're strong enough to make it 6 months, you'll (hopefully) be culled by a company to work for them, and they'll promptly clip your wings off. Perhaps the only corporation that doesn't clip your wings is the Georges Company, which is our protagonist's company. Being a Smell (did I mention that each person has one dominant sense? No? Well, sounds are paranoid because they can hear everything, sights are creative and usually good looking, feels are super horny all the time, smells are meticulously clean due to the stench of dirty stuff, and tastes are usually obese), Lincoln isn't exactly artistically inclined, which is what the GO specializes in producing. His love/loathe relationship with Luci serves as his inspiration, though, and he creates new type of art based on smell...he uses actual sweat, blood, etc to mix in with his paint so that Smells can literally become immersed in his paintings. This kinda reminded me of Perfume: The Story of a Murderer by Patrick Suskind. It also kinda made me wonder if this is the autobiographical part...could it be that Luci really is based off a chick that inspired Carlton to create an entirely new area of fiction?

Probably not...I'm most likely imagining things. But still, this book really caught my attention right from the author's note, and held it clear through. I really highly recommend this one to all Bizarro fans out there. Oh yeah- there are also 'eggheads' in this one. You know, people that choose to give up life in the external world in exchange for compensation and a couple hundred thousand souls stored in their genetically modified huge brains that serve as 'Heaven'? No, you didn't know about egg-heads? Well then, hop to! Read this on ASAP; you won't be sorry!

[S.T. Cartledge · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think this is one of Carlton Mellick’s favourite of his books. It’s probably one of my favourites too. Where his other books are mostly just weird in creative and interesting ways, this book takes his creative and interesting weirdness to staggering heights, completely reconstructing how people perceive the world around them. People are tuned in to their senses in different ways and some people are born better off than others. It’s a narrative that acknowledges some of the worst aspects of contemporary cultures, and it attempts to prove that what you’re born as and who you are can be two different things, and the person who has control over that is you. Of course, this is a bleak dystopian narrative and it’s not all that fluffy and nice, but it certainly shows an ugly aspect of society that can only improve through change. And the guys that have the power to change are the ones that benefit most from the way things are. It’s been a while since I read it, so I can’t remember the details, and maybe I’m reading too much into it, but I remember it was pretty amazing stuff.

[Simon · Rating 2 out of 5]

Carlton Mellick's stories are hit-or-miss for me. And this one was definitely a miss.
The focus on smells is very well done, the weird idea of how humans develop is also pretty interesting, and the world itself is intriguing. However, the style of the novel, the development, and the flow of the narrative simply did not gel with me. I am not appalled by gross or cruel imagery, but it total, this one was lacking something. I simply cannot put my finger on it. Ah, well, personal taste. Although the novel could have benefitted from better proofreading and a few corrections (although I have seen way, way worse in Mellick's writings).

[Alexa · Rating 3 out of 5]

A lot of "he said" and "she said," but despite this, the book was entertaining. I really liked the description of scents the main character described but hated how obsessed he was with Luci. I find that a lot of Carlton's books incorporate a manic pixie dream girl and a mediocre man...but who am I to complain? I'm just here for the ride.

[axegrinder · Rating 3 out of 5]

So, I gave Mellick another shot after The Haunted Vagina, which I found to be one of the flattest, most uninspired reads I’ve come across. A great concept, sure—but absolutely no plot structure, and a complete lack of narrative follow-through. It read like a sketch of a cool idea rather than an actual story.

That said, I’d heard from several people that Mellick’s writing improves significantly starting around Egg Man, so I dove in with cautious optimism.

And truthfully? Egg Man started off strong. The first half was weird in the right ways—fresh, surreal, even gripping. If it had stayed on that track, it would’ve been a solid 5/5 for me. Unfortunately, somewhere past the halfway mark, the story begins to flatten out.

There’s an increasing amount of gratuitous, repetitive sex scenes that feel more like filler than essential story beats. The narrative begins to lose its sense of momentum and thematic focus, becoming oddly one-note despite its bizarre premise. At around 60–70%, I knocked my rating down to a 4/5.

Then the ending came—and that really hurt the book for me. The protagonist undergoes a sudden, jarring transformation that strips away everything compelling about him. He stops being a character with agency and just becomes a tool in the plot, which, by that point, is more concerned with shock than substance. It’s a nihilistic shift that doesn’t feel earned or coherent, and it ultimately derails what could’ve been a powerful, weird little book.

It’s a shame, really. Egg Man had a lot of potential, but it underdelivers by the end. Still, I can see glimmers of stronger storytelling here compared to his earlier work. Mellick was clearly still developing his craft back in 2008—some common writing pitfalls are on full display (underdeveloped arcs, abrupt tonal shifts, thin character work)—but there’s something here worth exploring.

I’ll probably dip into some of his later works to see how he’s evolved since then. Fingers crossed the growth continues.

3/5, Sadly

[Richard Longmore · Rating 5 out of 5]

CM3 has a gift. He can take ridiculous ideas, combine them, then follow through with creating a story that not only exists in this strange world - but makes sense as part of this completely made up world.

And while I have no problem with longer "world building" novels, he can do all of this in under 200 pages. The Egg Man is a great example of this talent.

Our world, this time, is built on corporations and organizations which basically take the place of race and nationality. So you may have been born into the McDonalds organization. Initially as fly, of course, leading to huge amounts of children but most dying off like tadpoles before they can transform to their adult form.

Oh, and on top of that, everyone has one extra strong sense and 4 dulled senses. Our protagonist is a "Smell". As such, you too shall smell this book, as every scent will be described in explicit detail.

And we haven't even started discussing the "story". This is prime Mellick, a tale of love, art, vengeance, pain and sex seen through a prism of baffling world custom built for this one story.

So, ask yourself - do I want to immerse myself in a totally different, unique and strange world and smell every page as the story grows more and more peculiar?

Damn right you do.

[Matevž · Rating 4 out of 5]

As the author says in the introduction - a "what if" book.

The premise is interesting if perhaps a bit "unfinished". The author opened several "what ifs" - alternate reproduction, alternate specializations, alternate socialisation / corporations.

But most of them are not fleshed out to the finish. We get to know that infants are caught and indoctrinated but that's almost all we know.

We get a glimpse into the alternate reproduction but again only a glimpse.

The only aspect that is really fleshed out are the senses - the Smell, Sight, Feel... pepoeple personalities.

An interesting read anyway.

[Gabrielle · Rating 4 out of 5]

Quite the ride we went on! I love the world's CMIII just thrust upon us with no holds barred. In this world, people are very much the embodiment of a corporate structure. Think Matrix, but make it BlackRock corporation-esque and add a *few* genetic differences to the.. humans? Our main character is a Smell, and I don't think I've smelled quite so viscerally from words on a page before. The birthing scene will stick with me for a while to come. It's really a feat that our fearless author has pulled off. Quick read, but fun and worth the time!

[H]

Not Mellick's best. It has a disgusting charm to it with all the scent descriptions, and there's an intriguing world in the background, where people are raised by corporations. But there's something missing here, the plot doesn't really go anywhere massively interesting and then just ends with our protag's death. Can probably skip this one.

[Andrea · Rating 3 out of 5]

Didn't love the misogyny in this one. I've only ever read one other bizarro novel so far (Quicksand House by the same author) but I'm aware that this is kind of an anything goes type of genre. Nontheless, the melodramatic virgin-to-femidice pipeline of the main character was just not my thing. I really enjoyed the book until Lincoln's jealousy really hit.

[Vee (Nessie) Carsten · Rating 4 out of 5]

What…. In the world. *deep breath* ok that was bizarre and I don’t know if I liked the book or hated it. There was so much absolute chaos going on in a world where corporates go outside and catch ‘fetus flies’ because god forbid ‘humans’ are normal in bizzaro fiction lol. This book was so whacky. XD

[Norman Miller · Rating 5 out of 5]

The story of a man trying to survive as an artist in a future where people are citizens of various corporations and are born as flies. Messed up. It features some of the grossest sex scenes ever written. It'll make you feel dirty. Highly recommended!

[Ivo · Rating 5 out of 5]

10 out of 5 stars!!!!!

[Phil Zimmerman · Rating 3 out of 5]

Intersting different direction for CM3. Love the ideas around senses and corporations of people.

[LaTonya Reed · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loved it

The only reason I didn't give it a 5 star is because I felt like the Egg Man should have been the main character. I feel like Mellick could have really developed the Egg Man into something fantastic! Once the Egg Man came into play, I wanted more. Overall, I enjoyed the other characters and Mellick created a very interesting world, that could easily visualize. I would definitely recommend!

[Matthew Revert · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Author’s note for Carlton Mellick III’s ‘The Egg Man’ offers a fascinating insight into the book’s creation. It relays a childhood memory that Carlton shared with his sister about a horrifying boogeyman type entity known as the Egg Man. The massive-brained occupants of this book don’t bear resemblance to the monster of Carlton’s childhood but it’s clear that the concept of the Egg Man wasn’t something the author ever managed to shake. From the get go, this infuses the Egg Man with a certain dread – almost as if childhood fear was wretched into warped world of adulthood, with all the baggage that brings, and forced to survive. To me at least, this is a fascinating notion. It’s compelling to consider a book that is born from old memories that ultimately fracture and contort over time.

The Egg Man of this book refers, what at some point must have been, a mere human, who has been giving a brain transplant. Nothing too outlandish there, until you consider that the human is dwarfed by the enormous brain he sports. Others volunteer for this transplant too, almost as if the idea is sexually alluring. The world inhabited by these transplant recipients could be described as a dystopia, however, to me, the notion of a dystopia infers the degradation of a society. The impression one gets from The Egg Man is of an alternate society that has, in one way or another, always been the way it is. Corporations don’t rule so much as they are lived culturally by those beneath them. ‘Inhabitants’ of corporations speak in a corporation-specific language, unintelligible to outsiders. Art is homogenized into dry government procedure and the notion of critique is reduced to methodical commercialization. Working in the Bizarro genre, it wouldn’t surprise me if Mr. Mellick’s understandable attack on criticism was based on personal experience. Many people dismiss Bizarro before actually learning what it’s about and being one of the forefathers of the style, Mellick’s probably copped his fair share of guff.

An aspect to The Egg Man I find fascinating is the use of smell as a narrative mechanism. The sense of smell isn’t something often lingered upon in fiction, which makes sense. Smell is such an abstract notion that it’s hard to portray successfully with the written word. You can describe the way something smells but the reaction within a reader will most likely be too personal to convey the intention successfully. To Mellick’s immense credit, he successfully brings the smell of the book to life. The book’s main character, Lincoln, is what is known as a ‘Smell’ who uses his nostrils to relate to the world around him. Other characters within the book are also defined by their dominant sense. I can’t help but think it would have been much easier to write this book from the perspective of a ‘Sight’ or even a ‘Feel’. Ultimately though, some of the wonderful uniqueness would have been lost. I honestly can’t think of another book that utilizes smell in quite the same way.

I’ve only really lingered on a couple of the dominant themes in The Egg Man. Truth is, the book is packed with them. It’s a very dark book but in some ways, I think it’s the most realistic Mellick book I’ve read. We already live in a time of corporate devotion (hello Mac Vs PC, Coke Vs Pepsi etc…). Art is much more about commercial prospect than it is about legitimate transcendence or message. Critics will drag you down if their view doesn’t gel with what they critique. Ultimately though, we’re all tamed by the society we’re born into. At the end of the day, it’s a sense of inevitability I take away from The Egg Man.

This is a special book and one of Mellick’s crowning achievements.

[John Lawson · Rating 2 out of 5]

In an alternate universe where humans breed like insets, and people work for gigantic, soulless corporations, one man seeks beauty in bad smells. Mutated brain creatures ensue.

My first experience with the "bizarro" genre. Strangeness for strangeness sake is fine, but this book seems to out of its way to be as unpleasant as possible, to no useful end that I could see. Sexually lurid to the point of pornographic, violence to shock Quentin Tarantino, gross enough to entertain any 7th grader. Not sure if that's the core of bizarro or just how this author rolls.

I do think a lot of it undercut the thrust of the story, which otherwise was really good... other than the 3rd act reappearance/rescue by The Monster (a la "Jurassic Park" T-rex), which really made no sense.

I also think the ending could have been better. Rather than him dying in the street, which is plenty dark, sure, but it seemed clear from the foreshadowing that his ultimate fate should have been him serving Heaven, Inc as a living brain. Then it could have delivered the dystopic twist by having the girl and the Egg Man delivered into his brain where he'd be forced to watch their trysts for eternity.

[Matt · Rating 4 out of 5]

I like the minimalist aspect of this book, it flows almost like a children's story. Very quick read, and I love the idea of what the Egg Man is (the ultimate in electro-acoustic). Contrary to the back cover comments, I don't think this is anywhere near CM3's darkest or grittiest works. Yes it is appropriately stark, post-apocal-something, violent and sexual... but relatively tame in my eyes. The author mentions how disturbing he finds smells, but I don't get the same impact. In fact, I felt like this entire world is ripe (pun intended) for expansion. Yes I get this was a fairy tale, but I would love to see it on a bigger scale. An intriguing part for me is the discovery of such high tech combination of information and biology (which is something I'm already fascinated with), as well as the main character's artistic revelation. It's not my favorite CM3 by far, but it's a neatly concise work with little philosophical treats left here and there, and of course boobs.

[Jeremy Maddux · Rating 3 out of 5]

Didn't like or understand the quotationless dialogue structure of this one at all, but a strong concept and vivid imagery made up for it. And, of course, I give Carlton Mellick all the credit in the world for creating an Island of Misfit Writers. This one wasn't my favorite of his. That honor goes to Quicksand House.

[jasmine · Rating 5 out of 5]

honestly, all of my mellick reviews are more or less the same thing: his world building skills are second-to-none, he pays close attention to the diversity of his cast without making it feel like an afterschool special, and all of his characters seem to pop right out at you, even tiny, irrelevant background characters. i love his books, i love his girls. i love him. there you go.

[William · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am going to have to give this a five. CM III is a master of the genre and this is one of his masterpieces. This is the story of a dystopian reality where humans are born like flies, corporations own your body and soul and your future is dictated by a random act of fate.

[Rose O'Keefe · Rating 5 out of 5]

In my top 5 favorite Carlton Mellick III books.

[Jesse · Rating 3 out of 5]

Another imaginative short story. Kinda cool.