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Reset: Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life
Change Your Life, One Habit at a Time
You may feel like old habits die hard—but when your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are in-sync, lasting change becomes attainable. Licensed counselor and faith-forward author Debra Fileta is here to help you break free, trading unhealthy cyclical behaviors for life-giving new patterns.
In this book, Debra walks with you through 31 powerful and sustainable practices. Each exercise is grounded in psychology, rooted in God’s Word, and designed to transform your behavior with changes that last. Reset will help you
No matter how many times you’ve failed before, God’s power and a renewed perspective can help you make this time different. So get ready to Reset and begin this journey of thriving from the inside out!
You may feel like old habits die hard—but when your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are in-sync, lasting change becomes attainable. Licensed counselor and faith-forward author Debra Fileta is here to help you break free, trading unhealthy cyclical behaviors for life-giving new patterns.
In this book, Debra walks with you through 31 powerful and sustainable practices. Each exercise is grounded in psychology, rooted in God’s Word, and designed to transform your behavior with changes that last. Reset will help you
No matter how many times you’ve failed before, God’s power and a renewed perspective can help you make this time different. So get ready to Reset and begin this journey of thriving from the inside out!
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Published April 18, 2023
246 people are currently reading
832 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 43 reviews
September 5, 2023
I’m not a stranger to this kind of book, however, Debra wrote to a difficult situation. She blends what physiologists have learned with the truths of Scripture. This book is most effective with all the homework. The homework was not what I necessarily wanted, but in turn, it was what was needed. Having been told over and over about mindfulness and it never working for me, Reset took a different approach and gave me bite sized steps to grow.
July 7, 2024
Great book!! Very similar to “winning the war of your mind” which is great because we know the methods they talk about are accurate and working!! If you struggle to break habits and unhealthily thinking patterns… this is a great read!!
July 14, 2023
I loved this book! Debra gives so many action steps and talks through so many things I’ve struggled with - toxic optimism, own your thoughts, pausing, the physical impact of emotions and so much more. Totally recommend this one!
December 11, 2024
A great book on how, as Pastor Jeff puts it, “to change your stinkin’ thinkin’.” I loved all the practical tips about the importance of acknowledging your feelings, but not letting them control you and capturing negative thoughts.
February 12, 2025
I found this to be one of the best self help books available. Not only was it encouraging, but there was space for self-reflection and practical ways to apply the knowledge to help readers live life more freely with Christ. I will be referring back to this book often.
February 26, 2024
3 stars ⭐️ - because it was an average read - A great book on Christian ideals and how to integrate these beliefs and processes into your daily life. Good insights on problems/issues most people are dealing with when they decide they need a reset. It does have a large push for counseling, which I think is important, however I didn’t feel like that should be the pushed as hard when most people are just trying to get started and find their footing again when looking into books like this, but I do give her props for following her beliefs and encouraging counseling to all.
March 14, 2023
This book is a great walkthrough on dealing with life issues as a Christian. Debra Fileta deals with how we think, feel, and behave in light of what God expects of His people. She also shows the psychological studies and research to show that there is a high correlation between what God has revealed in His Word and what those in the medical community have found in their research.
It is structured into 31 chapters so it is something that you can digest in a month's time if you really wanted to. But taking your time and mastering some of the principles and practices mentioned is probably the best way to read through this book. Also, if you are really struggling with something, it is always best to seek help from someone who is trained and present. Books are wonderful, but they are not great substitutes for direct, one-on-one counseling. Her organization has a network of people that you could contact if you choose.
There is one thing that keeps me from giving this book a five-star rating and that is that she seems to be more of an integrationist when it comes to counseling. For those who may not know what that is, it is a counseling philosophy in biblical counseling circles where the findings and recommended treatments of secular, psychological sources are considered just as, if not more valid in the treatment program than the teaching and recommended practices contained in the Bible. Personally, I lean heavily to the side of neuthetic counseling, that is, purely Bible-based counseling, but I also recognize that observation and research can definitely inform the treatment of an individual. Debra Fileta does a good job of correlating the findings of Scripture on a matter, helping the reader see that God's Word does speak to us today.
Overall, its a great book and I definitely encourage you to buy it. You should also check out her other content at https://debrafileta.com/. It's worth it.
It is structured into 31 chapters so it is something that you can digest in a month's time if you really wanted to. But taking your time and mastering some of the principles and practices mentioned is probably the best way to read through this book. Also, if you are really struggling with something, it is always best to seek help from someone who is trained and present. Books are wonderful, but they are not great substitutes for direct, one-on-one counseling. Her organization has a network of people that you could contact if you choose.
There is one thing that keeps me from giving this book a five-star rating and that is that she seems to be more of an integrationist when it comes to counseling. For those who may not know what that is, it is a counseling philosophy in biblical counseling circles where the findings and recommended treatments of secular, psychological sources are considered just as, if not more valid in the treatment program than the teaching and recommended practices contained in the Bible. Personally, I lean heavily to the side of neuthetic counseling, that is, purely Bible-based counseling, but I also recognize that observation and research can definitely inform the treatment of an individual. Debra Fileta does a good job of correlating the findings of Scripture on a matter, helping the reader see that God's Word does speak to us today.
Overall, its a great book and I definitely encourage you to buy it. You should also check out her other content at https://debrafileta.com/. It's worth it.
November 18, 2023
I took my time working through this book, actually doing the questions at the end of each chapter. I took many notes! Here are a few highlights:
Patterns take less energy. The brain loves the path of least resistance. When we aren’t deliberately leading our thoughts, we will follow our (unhealthy) thoughts. It takes deliberation and intentionality to take ownership of our thoughts.
Just because you feel something doesn't make it true. Your feelings are real -they are signals-, but they aren't always true.
Just because you feel lonely doesn’t mean you’re really alone.
Just because you feel worthless doesn’t mean you’re lacking in value.
Just because you feel afraid doesn’t mean there’s something to fear.
Just because you feel inadequate doesn’t mean you don’t have what it takes.
Just because you feel useless doesn’t mean you lack significance.
Just because you feel hopeless doesn’t mean there’s no hope.
Just because you feel overwhelmed doesn’t mean you’re not capable.
Just because you feel something doesn’t make it true.
Life is a process. It’s a cycle. It’s a journey of healing one layer at a time. Just because you fail today doesn’t mean you’re going to fail tomorrow. Just because you mastered something today doesn’t mean you won’t need to practice again tomorrow. Again, healing is a journey; growth is a process; change isn’t a once-and-done thing. When you see something come back in your life that you were hoping to get rid of once and for all, remember that healing happens in layers. This isn’t a setback; it’s just an opportunity for deeper healing - a new layer exposed and revealed is a new layer to be healed.
Patterns take less energy. The brain loves the path of least resistance. When we aren’t deliberately leading our thoughts, we will follow our (unhealthy) thoughts. It takes deliberation and intentionality to take ownership of our thoughts.
Just because you feel something doesn't make it true. Your feelings are real -they are signals-, but they aren't always true.
Just because you feel lonely doesn’t mean you’re really alone.
Just because you feel worthless doesn’t mean you’re lacking in value.
Just because you feel afraid doesn’t mean there’s something to fear.
Just because you feel inadequate doesn’t mean you don’t have what it takes.
Just because you feel useless doesn’t mean you lack significance.
Just because you feel hopeless doesn’t mean there’s no hope.
Just because you feel overwhelmed doesn’t mean you’re not capable.
Just because you feel something doesn’t make it true.
Life is a process. It’s a cycle. It’s a journey of healing one layer at a time. Just because you fail today doesn’t mean you’re going to fail tomorrow. Just because you mastered something today doesn’t mean you won’t need to practice again tomorrow. Again, healing is a journey; growth is a process; change isn’t a once-and-done thing. When you see something come back in your life that you were hoping to get rid of once and for all, remember that healing happens in layers. This isn’t a setback; it’s just an opportunity for deeper healing - a new layer exposed and revealed is a new layer to be healed.
November 6, 2023
Heard the author interviewed on a podcast, and ordered the book. It did not disappoint. It is practical, and I found it to a helpful resource. Each chapter has reflective questions or exercises to do.
“Every thought you think releases some sort of neurochemicals. Negative thoughts release stress chemicals, and positive ones release feel good chemicals”. That is fascinating to me to consider that changing ones thoughts literally changes one’s brain!
“At the other end of the very same emotions that bring discomfort and pain are feelings that bring fulfillment, satisfaction, and healing. When you feel deeply on one side, you’ll feel deeply on the other side. Because on the other side of deep anxiety, there is deep peace. On the other side of strong sorrow, there is strong joy. On the other side of overwhelming heartache, there is overwhelming gratitude.” I absolutely resonate with this quote. The journey in healing is definitely worth all of the work!
“Every thought you think releases some sort of neurochemicals. Negative thoughts release stress chemicals, and positive ones release feel good chemicals”. That is fascinating to me to consider that changing ones thoughts literally changes one’s brain!
“At the other end of the very same emotions that bring discomfort and pain are feelings that bring fulfillment, satisfaction, and healing. When you feel deeply on one side, you’ll feel deeply on the other side. Because on the other side of deep anxiety, there is deep peace. On the other side of strong sorrow, there is strong joy. On the other side of overwhelming heartache, there is overwhelming gratitude.” I absolutely resonate with this quote. The journey in healing is definitely worth all of the work!
January 5, 2025
This book, written to a Christian audience is a simple, helpful, and basic walk through some of the most popular ideas and tips on metal health. Fileta has an interesting voice, and while you can tell she is trying to keep both her psychological and spiritual ideas on a level for the widest audience their is a lot of good information here.
If this was your first jump into the topic this book could be life changing.
If you were looking for a reset, this book could be the start of a new launch.
If you have read 15 other books on the subject, this will be a simple summation of many of those ideas with some logical flow and Christian connection.
I would recommend this book accordingly
If this was your first jump into the topic this book could be life changing.
If you were looking for a reset, this book could be the start of a new launch.
If you have read 15 other books on the subject, this will be a simple summation of many of those ideas with some logical flow and Christian connection.
I would recommend this book accordingly
March 3, 2025
This one was ok
It's a holistic overview of self care. Fileta is fairly broad with her encouragements about how to live a more healthy, balanced life. She addresses everythign from diet and exercise to therapy, sleep habits and boundaries in relationships. I found it a helpful reminder to keep working on these different areas of my life but they were all things I was already aware of. This is a great kind of entry level book for someone to recover from burnout or else have some wise advice about setting up healthy habits.
It's a holistic overview of self care. Fileta is fairly broad with her encouragements about how to live a more healthy, balanced life. She addresses everythign from diet and exercise to therapy, sleep habits and boundaries in relationships. I found it a helpful reminder to keep working on these different areas of my life but they were all things I was already aware of. This is a great kind of entry level book for someone to recover from burnout or else have some wise advice about setting up healthy habits.
March 15, 2023
If you would like to find your life different in 31 days, I would encourage you to purchase this book, read it and do the exercises in each mini chapter.
The author uses a solid approach to creating change and healing in the reader’s life. We plan to use this book in our counseling center. I’ve already recommended it to several clients and can’t wait to see them begin a structured journey of proven Christian counseling strategies.
The author uses a solid approach to creating change and healing in the reader’s life. We plan to use this book in our counseling center. I’ve already recommended it to several clients and can’t wait to see them begin a structured journey of proven Christian counseling strategies.
May 21, 2023
Really great book! Insightful and thoughtful. I highly recommend! I just wish I would have bought the actual book (physical or kindle). I'm listening to the audio book (read by the author) and she does a fantastic job narrating it, it's just that there are so many great questions at the end of each chapter that I want to journal about, and it's hard to listen to the audiobook and try to jot down the questions to journal later.
July 23, 2025
Healing
When I started reading this book I was doing therapy for post-partum depression and anxiety. I can honestly say it helped me alot, it was like having a second therapist. It made me feel seen and understood. It gave ways and examples of what I can do to further my healing. To have control on my emotions. To not light a big fire (metaphorically speaking) but to learn to tame it. Debra Fileta, you are a Godsend.
When I started reading this book I was doing therapy for post-partum depression and anxiety. I can honestly say it helped me alot, it was like having a second therapist. It made me feel seen and understood. It gave ways and examples of what I can do to further my healing. To have control on my emotions. To not light a big fire (metaphorically speaking) but to learn to tame it. Debra Fileta, you are a Godsend.
June 10, 2024
I enjoyed this book and Debra's advice, especially in the first half of the book. It was a timely read, however; I started skimming it from middle to end. I felt like I got out of it what I needed/wanted within the first half. I have a shelf with books to reference for research, writing, and personal growth, and this one definitely is going on there.
August 27, 2024
This is a great book which gave me a lot to think about. I need to go through it again with a chapter for each day to meditate and take action on (as and when), but on a first read through, it provided the inspiration to change aspects of my life, the habits that get me down and the confidence to change.
November 30, 2024
I really loved this book!
This is such a great book to read! I really enjoyed it and know I will come back to it again and again. I learned so much on how our brains work and how we can control our thoughts, and understand our feelings and make the changes we need to make. I also love the biblical views and the scriptures included. I absolutely loved this book!
This is such a great book to read! I really enjoyed it and know I will come back to it again and again. I learned so much on how our brains work and how we can control our thoughts, and understand our feelings and make the changes we need to make. I also love the biblical views and the scriptures included. I absolutely loved this book!
August 29, 2025
Excellent and thorough book to unpack your life and deal with the lies and issues of the past to emerge stronger and grounded in faith.
Every psychological tool used is grounded in scripture which means they actually work.
This is not a book for reading, but a book for doing and actually choosing to change your life.
Every psychological tool used is grounded in scripture which means they actually work.
This is not a book for reading, but a book for doing and actually choosing to change your life.
January 12, 2024
This book took a long time and I think I’m gonna restart it again. It takes you on a beautiful journey of resetting and practical steps to heal. I think the first time around was an introduction to a deeper understanding of being fully healed and now I am going to dive in at an even slower pace.
January 31, 2024
This book is full of powerful tools and Biblical insight to help us change our thought patterns. Each chapter ends with questions or activities to do. It is worth the time to read but also requires the investment in yourself to dig deep and work through the questions in each chapter.
May 18, 2024
As a Life Coach I found these topics useful…it read like a textbook.
As a human, I found these topics insightful….it read like a Big Sister Encourager.
As a reader? I found these topics beautifully presented. Highly recommend for anyone!
As a human, I found these topics insightful….it read like a Big Sister Encourager.
As a reader? I found these topics beautifully presented. Highly recommend for anyone!
June 24, 2025
I thought this book was really good. It helped me to see a lot of areas that I've heard of before but look at them in new ways to help make a difference in my life. I think it's really important to go through slowly though in order to be able to see sustained change in your life.
April 23, 2023
This is one of the books that I will read for a daily devotional and do the action steps. Listening was great, but reading and putting action steps into practice will be life changing.
June 7, 2023
Great read. Felt a lot like a free therapy session to help get your life in order
September 8, 2023
Very practical 👏🏽👏🏽
November 4, 2023
A very practical, helpful book to help guide change in our lives. The principles are simple but useful.
November 5, 2023
Great book for breaking bad habits or starting news ones. I may do it again to build another good habit.
November 16, 2023
I would recommend it to anyone ready to change and be a better version of yourself. Many necessary practice changes to improve your life.
November 30, 2023
too simple for me, too many negative examples, might help someone who is very new to these concepts, biblical references weren't strongly back
March 1, 2024
Honestly, one of the best books I've read. So much depth, insight, and practicality. It highlighted to me again the need of Christian counselors in our world today.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 43 reviews