The Complex Infrastructure Known as the Female Mind: According to Relient K

by Relient K, Mark Nichols

In The Complex Infrastructure Known as the Female Mind , Relient K expounds on their experiences observing the opposite sex. Detailing some of the "girl types" they've encountered--like the Homecoming Queen, The Athlete, and The Overachiever--they share personal stories and biblical advice for girls of any type to become women of God. The band's fun attitude is present throughout the book in quizzes, lists, personal stories, and more!

Genres: Nonfiction, Humor, Adult, Comedy, Christian

178 pages, Paperback

First published November 3, 2004

Reviews

[Kendall · Rating 1 out of 5]

absolute time capsule. namedrops both donald trump and bill cosby in a positive light

relient k has been my favorite band for probably 20 years. i've always felt like they evolved with me. but this book is from way before either of us evolved. i can't figure out who this was written for. i have no idea why a girl would read this. or a boy. a 12 year old or a 20 year old. just completely no reason for this book to exist for anyone.

incredibly offensive in many parts! if you have black hair you can't be The Homecoming Queen....... what did you mean by that, boys!!!!!!!

[Gregory Jones · Rating 1 out of 5]

I understand that I am not the target demographic of this book, but there are some issues that need to be discussed here regardless. First of all, this is a travesty to say that anything about this book is from or about Thiessen, Hoopes, and the gang. It is, in a word, tripe.

As a long time fan of Relient K, having written somewhat seriously about Thiessen's work over the years, I was excited to finally track down this book. Instead, what I found was some early 2000s blathering about dating. It read like a Teen Vogue magazine before the editorial shift that made them interesting.

There's a series of descriptions of "types of girls" that makes up the majority of the book. There are little side bars with members of the band explaining the girls that they knew that fit into these categories. The stereotypes are funny in a "gee whiz you guyssss" sort of way, but not at all helpful to character formation (for young women) or understanding women (for young men), which were the ostensible purposes of the book. As the book unfolds, there are descriptions of how women should behave and dress. At the end of each stereotype there's a way they fit in to "youth group" which just about punctuates the vapidity of this book.

It's not a sociological study. It's not the actual thoughts of the band in any meaningful way. It appears to be a bit of a cashgrab by the publisher to capitalize (literally) on the popularity of one of the most successful Christian crossover bands in recent memory.

I was expecting thoughtful reflection from Matthew Thiessen, the amazingly evocative and engaging songwriter who is the mastermind of the band. As far as I can tell, the only thing Thiessen had to do with this book was contributing the title, which is a lyric from one of his songs.

[Philip · Rating 3 out of 5]

I found this book while going through some of my wife's books. It is funny and entertaining; I can imagine that me and my friends would have had a great time in high school trying to categorize all the girls in our youth group.

[Natalie · Rating 3 out of 5]

I am a combination of about 3 or 4 different “girl types” so I’m not sure which one I actually am, but the book was still fun to read. I love Relient K and have been wanting to read this book for a while now, so I’m glad I made time for it.

[Troy Nevitt · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a fun read. There's not really any depth of content, but it was a funny throwback.

[Rachel · Rating 4 out of 5]

Whenever guys attempt to understand girls, hilarity ensues. I really loved the different categories of girls: "The Airhead" (spazzy, random, fun to be around) "The Girlfriend" (clingy, entire life and personality revolves around the guy she's currently dating), "The Overachiever" (has a million things going at one time, can plan anything and is a part of every committee at school), "The Drama Queen" (needs attention constantly), and so on. I didn't find any categories I neatly fit into, but I'd say it's a nice combination of all of them! lol And I know girls who are exactly like that. XD

The two categories of men: The Ape and Mr. Wonderful were pretty funny as well, though I wish they'd delved into personality types a bit more. All in all, a great read with a Christian theme. I wish Reliant K would do a follow-up!

[Sara Parker · Rating 5 out of 5]

Disregarding the fact that I just love Relient K, this book is a clever, sensitive, and humorous take on what girls are like in the eyes of guys. Also, what guys are like in the eyes of guys. It's a bit stereotypical in the beginning, but it's heartfelt, and for every "girl type" they name there are both positive and negatives. I myself am vanilla pudding, and that suits me just fine. This book also gives Relient K's take on the different types of relationships there are. It makes me laugh every time, and it's just a light read for a day when you need something extra to make you smile. Plus they're snarky, and that's what I love about them. Besides their fantastic music, that is.

[Emily · Rating 5 out of 5]

What an awesome book! This is Relient K at their best- funny, witty, and Christian! This book perfectly balances serious topics with comic relief as a band of boys tries to figure out what is going on inside girls' minds. My only complaint with this book was how short it was, because I loved it so much! I definitely recommend this book to fans of Relient K, but anyone can enjoy it.

[Miss Clark · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was actually a fun read and interesting. Some good things to think about and some amusing passages.

[Lynn · Rating 3 out of 5]

this was a very enlightening read on the different types of women there are in the world and i just absolutely loved it. it is fairly short and also a quick read.

[Jamie · Rating 1 out of 5]

I enjoyed Relient K when I was in middle school. 'Mmhmm' was one of my favorite albums in high school. It was great to see this immature, Christian "punk rock" band develop and grow from some simple riffs and juvenile lyrics to a successful group that offered an interesting perspective in the mid-2000's alternative rock scene.

Unfortunately, this book exists.

It's a snapshot of the early 00's misogyny. There are twelve "girl types" ranging from the Athlete and the Rock Chick to the Airhead and Vanilla Pudding ("Bill Cosby likes vanilla pudding and so do little kids."). Each type is given a few paragraphs of definition followed by some anecdotal info and a personal relationship to the specific type from one of the band members (Matt Hoopes discusses his at-the-time wife as a Vanilla Pudding girl...it's pretty rough).

There are only two types of guys (the Ape and Mr. Wonderful), which communicates a lot of their worldview at the time as well. The final section is a "Come to Jesus" mission statement which includes lines like, "Not only has God made you unique and knows you completely, quirks and all, but he accepts you for who you are." That statement doesn't read as genuine following the sophomoronic concepts of the previous 161 pages.

Ultimately, Relient K themselves have apologized for this time in their lives.

[Derek Cook · Rating 1 out of 5]

Ah man…Relient K is my favorite band. I didn’t grow up listening to them because of church or youth group or strict parents…I just fell in love with them on my own.
So yeah, this book seems like a really weirdly ghost-written “instruction manual” that reads very juvenile. I guess that’s the intended audience, but man, this thing did not age well at all haha tbh I didn’t even finish it. I don’t need weirdly objective takes on different “types” of girls.
I was hoping it’d be more philosophical or humorous, like a Jim Gaffigan. But it wasn’t. It was a droney read and the little bits about church seemed forced in at the end of each chapter. IDK. I bet they are also embarrassed to have this in their repertoire.

I’ll keep it because it’s part of my Relient K collection, but that’s the only reason.

[Maggie · Rating 1 out of 5]

I mean, if you ever wanted to go back in time and experience 2000s youth group culture, this is definitely one way to do it. But there are probably other methods that will leave your sanity intact.

This book will definitely entertain you if you enjoy completely bonkers and baseless analysis of teen life. In terms of actual advice or insight though, it has very little to offer - not at the time of its publication, and certainly not now, 20 years later.

And so we're all on the same page, Relient K didn't actually write this.
https://twitter.com/matthewhoopes/status/1621277358849228801

[Amelia Fancher · Rating 4 out of 5]

📖 | 4.75 ⭐️ it’s simple: if your favorite band has written a book, you buy said book- regardless of what’s in it. In the most positive and endearing way possible, it’s so apparent that this tongue-in-cheek inside look at guy’s brains was written by 4 twenty-something guys. This is the GOOFIEST how-to about dating I’ve ever read but I loved every page. It is…increeedibly dated (2004 hello) but it’s just got a great vibe. Long live RK

Also I saw Matt Thiessen walking down the street in West Nashville one time. Life was kinda changed

[Rebecca · Rating 4 out of 5]

While I wasn't entirely flattered to realize I fall into the category that the boys of Relient K label "vanilla pudding," I found this to be a fun, quirky, and lighthearted read. It is sprinkled with the humor I would expect from four men in their early twenties attempting to understand, and write songs about, the "complex infrastructure known as the female mind."

[Sarah · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed this book because it had a Relient K flavor to it. It's like the Chicken Soup books: wholesome, occasionally entertaining, but nothing exceptional. At this point, it's also rather dated.

I wouldn't really recommend this book unless:
1. you are a Relient K fan
2. you are a girl
2. you were born before 1998
Since I check those boxes, I liked it well enough.

[Mitchell Waller · Rating 1 out of 5]

Okay yes this was very sexist and did not age well.

However… if you view it as satire, which after reading the last chapter that kind of seems like what it was, it was funny. I mean just the fact that it is a “RELIENT K” book is funny.

Would I recommend to most people. NO

Would I recommend to RELIENT K fans who want a little giggle. maybe

[Brooke Buxton · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this book when I was 15 years old. I loved it then and would love to read it again.

[laurafee · Rating 4 out of 5]

When one of your favorite bands writes a book, you get and love it 😂 Super fun. Nothing overly serious but a few good insights.

[Andrew · Rating 3 out of 5]

There were several things I liked about this book. One, it was astoundingly moral. Another is that it was very funny, and made me laugh out loud at parts. For another thing, Relient K is my favorite band, so reading a book by them was cool. However, I must say it wasn't all that well written. For another thing, I'm a boy and it's for girls. Kind of a damper. The only other disappointment was the fact that it had no stories about their music career. It was mostly just individual experiences with girls the band members had. Since it's half and half as to what I liked and disliked about it, I rated it three stars.

[Heather N · Rating 4 out of 5]

An easy read, quite witty and enjoyable, and very illuminating, even though I AM a girl! Very informative for both guys and girls, though since I am girl, once I read some of it I was like "well of course, that makes sense..." a lot of the material they talk about (different girl types, different kinds of friendships, guy/girl relationships) seems like common-sense stuff, but they're often things we kinda take for granted, so it's enlightening to have it presented in such an accessible manner.

[Kaitlin · Rating 5 out of 5]

First of all I love Relient K so when I had heard they had written a book I had to buy and read it. In all honeslty I wasn't sure what to expect. It was actually pretty good, I loved it. It was funny and humerous but it was also pretty interesting and towards the end it was serious. I love how they let their faith in God come through in a fun way. Also it's pretty fun to try to decide wich girl you are.

[Claire · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was reminded of this book randomly today while out shopping. I recall reading it with great enjoyment. It is certainly meant as a silly book that coincides with the band's mood rings song, but it wasn't some dumb throwaway either.

[Kaelea Bearwald · Rating 4 out of 5]

To get some jokes in this book, you need to know a little about Relient K. But all in all, I believe it was a funny book that nailed females and their thinking.

[Allison · Rating 3 out of 5]

A humorous read, although there was little revealed I didn't know. It merely reinforced thoughts I'd had etc.

[Aubree · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is super clever, of course I'm also a fan of the band that wrote the book.

[Jessica · Rating 5 out of 5]

I Learnt so much from this book! definitely the best book for girls ever!

[Devon · Rating 2 out of 5]

It was ok. didnt keep my attention. only read it because i like the band. it was amusing to read with like other ppl picking who was who though

[Molly]

I love Relient K :D

[Candice · Rating 5 out of 5]

Probably one of the funniest books I've ever read.