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Friends: A Love Story
Courtney B. Vance met Angela Bassett….
They ran for years as friends in the same small circles. They had some hits, but mostly misses with other partners, and they shared one spectacularly dreadful first date together. And then, Courtney and Angela connected.
Experience the up-close-and-personal, real-life love story of this inspirational African-American celebrity couple. Learn how they navigate the fickle tides of fame, while keeping their relationship fresh and true. See how they've carved a meaningful life together in spite of humble beginnings, family tragedy and the ups and downs of stardom with love, faith and determination.
404 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2007
35 people are currently reading
408 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 35 reviews
January 12, 2008
I love a good love story and you will love this one! I learned something in each chapter. This book inspired me to believe in my relationships. They really gave me motivation to keep praying for my prince and have strong faith.
Encouraging words from the book:
Surround yourself with like-minded people and take that world with you wherever you go.
Its a continuous daily struggle for us humans to walk the path of righteousness. We are imperfect and all fall short. when that happens, get on your knees and ask for forgiveness; for the righteous may fall seven times and rise again. That a marvelous thing! It means you don't have to be right all the time. You're going to fall. But when you do, our Father's hands are going to be right there. Too Sweet!!! Enjoy!!
Encouraging words from the book:
Surround yourself with like-minded people and take that world with you wherever you go.
Its a continuous daily struggle for us humans to walk the path of righteousness. We are imperfect and all fall short. when that happens, get on your knees and ask for forgiveness; for the righteous may fall seven times and rise again. That a marvelous thing! It means you don't have to be right all the time. You're going to fall. But when you do, our Father's hands are going to be right there. Too Sweet!!! Enjoy!!
March 4, 2011
Bassett and Vance tell their life stories, the book switches from one to the other at each chapter. Then after they meet and are married their narratives are combined. Their love story was interesting, as was the story of how they became parents (through a surrogate mother). Sometimes I felt like they were glossing over certain things and not going very deep (but of course that is their choice in how much of their personal stuff they want to share). It reads very conversationally and towards the end they share how their faith has help ground them. It was an enjoyable read.
December 9, 2008
This was a good book on the life of Angela and her actor husband Courtney Vance (The Preachers Wife). We see an account of each of them individually (childhoods, schooling, careers, individual personalities). Midway through book, the 2 meet, almost 3/4 of the book, they end of crossing paths again which starts the beginning of a relationship. There is a small portion accredited to their relationship but it's very good information on some struggles they had to overcome. Overall it's a good read, especially if you are into the arts (acting, industry)
December 29, 2024
Okay I'm gonna try my hand at a (long) review for once. Or rather sharing my very personal thoughts on a book by a person who means a lot to me. Here we go!
I finished it! It took me three years but I did it :)
If you're wondering why it took me so long to read a book written by my favorite actress about her life and relationships the answer is all of that.
Though Angela has been one of my favorite actresses since I was very young, she made the top of my list in 2021 and I have been a very active fan since, watching her whole filmography, interacting with other fans and so on. I started reading this book about half a year into being an active fan.
My reaction to this book mostly lies in who I am and who I am not. For one, I am a very emotional person, which is the first reason it took me very long to get through Angela's first chapters. Every chapter made me cry. Crying makes my eyes burn. I started to avoid it.
Angela has been through a lot. And though she is one of the most resilient women I know (how do people make it through things like these without therapy?), there is no denying that she has experienced a lot of terrible things no person should ever have to.
I love her a lot, I can't help but feel with her and feel pain at her describing hers. And still I am grateful that she has shared her story and thus allowed me and others to hear it and see her in such vulnerable moments of her life.
All this not to even mention the historical significance of her narrative in any case. I think it's very interesting to learn how Black actors came up in the industry 50 years ago and she is one example. Another thing that I found interesting and important to read about in terms of the treatment of young (Black) actors was the making of the Tina Turner biopic "What's Love Got to Do With It". Another example of things no person should ever have to be put through, both Tina and Angela.
In general, I just loved learning about Angela's life and journey and finding out little background info about some of her projects. She is very witty and sweet in her tellings, much like she is in interviews whenever she feels comfortable and it's one of the things I love about her. As much as she had me crying and fuming at people who hurt her, she also made me laugh and love her even more because how could you not? Her personality is infectious. And so is her spirit.
The book alternates between Angela's and Courtney's lives and eventually joins them together when they start describing their relationship. Though I read the book primarily for Angela, I also thoroughly enjoyed reading about Courtney's life and struggles and will definitely pick up his recent book about mental health, as well.
Now I'm going to say one thing right now. Though I am a fan, I am not exactly the target audience for this book. Primarily because I'm not religious and the both of them definitely are. Which is something that can be hit or miss, especially, in my personal experience, with Christians. I knew going into the book though, that yes they are both religious Christians and yes they are also both open-minded, kind people with whom I share many values regardless of my spirituality.
I will come back to that point but first I want to return to Courtney. The thing that intrigued me the most in his chapters (but also did not surprise me) was the way he treated and approached Angela and their relationship. The reason this did not surprise me is that, though optics can be deceiving, it is pretty clear in their public behavior how much he adores and prioritizes his wife. It's very sweet to see and equally sweet to read about.
I'm going to share the thoughts I wrote down at the time I read that part. As much as Courtney likes to credit god (because that is what guided him) I think what he wrote is actually a great lesson in how resisting patriarchy is truly what makes relationships between men and women work. You don't need to be religious to understand that women are complex, that they have been harmed by men and the patriarchy and that it takes time to earn their trust and respect. That you can't manipulate them into trusting you. That you have to be willing to learn to understand them. I'm glad his faith is what helped him understand that and allowed them both to have a trusting and loving relationship because too many men interpret the bible the opposite way. I wish, regardless of faith, all men could view women as human beings and see the value in understanding us. Women are not more complicated nor *inherently* different from men. We've just been harmed by patriarchy in different ways and the only way to love us is to not replicate patriarchal values. When men resist patriarchy, not only do women respond with love, men also heal themselves.
I think his growth how he describes it in this book in general is very inspiring, which is why I'm curious to read his more recent book to see how it has transformed in the present.
Now the part where I really felt that I was not the target audience was in the very last chapter where the both of them give advice to singles, married people and everyone*.
*Christians
I realize that this book was written nearly 20 years ago and when their twins were still infants. It makes me quite curious how their stances have changed both over the course of their careers since 2007 and the course of raising their babies into respectful young adults who just started college.
While I may engage in my share of parasocial relationships, I am not the type who thinks my faves are beyond critique, higher than thou or that I have to agree with everything they say. I certainly didn't agree with all their advice or stances on the order of family (also simply based on the fact that this order doesn't include me in a few ways). My parents had me unplanned before they were married so I cannot agree with the whole "no kids before marriage" talk because to me that is a very limited view of family, as is the "man and woman" default. I really don't expect a straight couple in 2007 to include the notion of LGBTQ+ couples or family constellations in their considerations of what family should look like but I do wonder, after playing two queer characters, witnessing the legalization of gay marriage and watching their gay friends get married, if today's version of this advice written by them would be a little more inclusive.
There was also a section in one of Angela's chapters that was quite entrenched in purity politics, an aspect of Christianity I find straight-up harmful. I am in no way criticizing her choices and the intention behind them. In fact, I like them and can even relate to them for the most part. I feel bad reading about some of the things she was taught about sexuality, though. Especially having seen some of my Christian friends be genuinely triggered by similar rhetoric and struggling to return back to their usual selves and regain agency over their bodies and choices. All this to say that I am glad, even though Angela was taught these things, from what she wrote it doesn't seem like they hindered her quite as much from doing what was best for her and her sense of sexuality. In other words, my perception is that she has not let her spirituality, or rather the expectations the church often puts on its members, limit her agency over her own life and choices to her detriment the way I've seen it happen with some loved ones. And that was a relief to me.
I was going back and forth on whether I should give this book 4 or 5 stars. 5 because I love both of them so much as people and thought their story was very well-written. One star deducted because of some "advice"/stances I genuinely disagree with (and also a confusing amount of editing mistakes in the last part of the book).
I wish I could give 4 and a half because at the end of the day, I gained more from the book than it made me cringe. I can respect it for what it is and for the time when it was written. I appreciate this window into their usually quite private lives. And I'm pretty sure I will read it again at some point. So for now, I will stick with the 5 stars, I'm rounding up 😂
I finished it! It took me three years but I did it :)
If you're wondering why it took me so long to read a book written by my favorite actress about her life and relationships the answer is all of that.
Though Angela has been one of my favorite actresses since I was very young, she made the top of my list in 2021 and I have been a very active fan since, watching her whole filmography, interacting with other fans and so on. I started reading this book about half a year into being an active fan.
My reaction to this book mostly lies in who I am and who I am not. For one, I am a very emotional person, which is the first reason it took me very long to get through Angela's first chapters. Every chapter made me cry. Crying makes my eyes burn. I started to avoid it.
Angela has been through a lot. And though she is one of the most resilient women I know (how do people make it through things like these without therapy?), there is no denying that she has experienced a lot of terrible things no person should ever have to.
I love her a lot, I can't help but feel with her and feel pain at her describing hers. And still I am grateful that she has shared her story and thus allowed me and others to hear it and see her in such vulnerable moments of her life.
All this not to even mention the historical significance of her narrative in any case. I think it's very interesting to learn how Black actors came up in the industry 50 years ago and she is one example. Another thing that I found interesting and important to read about in terms of the treatment of young (Black) actors was the making of the Tina Turner biopic "What's Love Got to Do With It". Another example of things no person should ever have to be put through, both Tina and Angela.
In general, I just loved learning about Angela's life and journey and finding out little background info about some of her projects. She is very witty and sweet in her tellings, much like she is in interviews whenever she feels comfortable and it's one of the things I love about her. As much as she had me crying and fuming at people who hurt her, she also made me laugh and love her even more because how could you not? Her personality is infectious. And so is her spirit.
The book alternates between Angela's and Courtney's lives and eventually joins them together when they start describing their relationship. Though I read the book primarily for Angela, I also thoroughly enjoyed reading about Courtney's life and struggles and will definitely pick up his recent book about mental health, as well.
Now I'm going to say one thing right now. Though I am a fan, I am not exactly the target audience for this book. Primarily because I'm not religious and the both of them definitely are. Which is something that can be hit or miss, especially, in my personal experience, with Christians. I knew going into the book though, that yes they are both religious Christians and yes they are also both open-minded, kind people with whom I share many values regardless of my spirituality.
I will come back to that point but first I want to return to Courtney. The thing that intrigued me the most in his chapters (but also did not surprise me) was the way he treated and approached Angela and their relationship. The reason this did not surprise me is that, though optics can be deceiving, it is pretty clear in their public behavior how much he adores and prioritizes his wife. It's very sweet to see and equally sweet to read about.
I'm going to share the thoughts I wrote down at the time I read that part. As much as Courtney likes to credit god (because that is what guided him) I think what he wrote is actually a great lesson in how resisting patriarchy is truly what makes relationships between men and women work. You don't need to be religious to understand that women are complex, that they have been harmed by men and the patriarchy and that it takes time to earn their trust and respect. That you can't manipulate them into trusting you. That you have to be willing to learn to understand them. I'm glad his faith is what helped him understand that and allowed them both to have a trusting and loving relationship because too many men interpret the bible the opposite way. I wish, regardless of faith, all men could view women as human beings and see the value in understanding us. Women are not more complicated nor *inherently* different from men. We've just been harmed by patriarchy in different ways and the only way to love us is to not replicate patriarchal values. When men resist patriarchy, not only do women respond with love, men also heal themselves.
I think his growth how he describes it in this book in general is very inspiring, which is why I'm curious to read his more recent book to see how it has transformed in the present.
Now the part where I really felt that I was not the target audience was in the very last chapter where the both of them give advice to singles, married people and everyone*.
*Christians
I realize that this book was written nearly 20 years ago and when their twins were still infants. It makes me quite curious how their stances have changed both over the course of their careers since 2007 and the course of raising their babies into respectful young adults who just started college.
While I may engage in my share of parasocial relationships, I am not the type who thinks my faves are beyond critique, higher than thou or that I have to agree with everything they say. I certainly didn't agree with all their advice or stances on the order of family (also simply based on the fact that this order doesn't include me in a few ways). My parents had me unplanned before they were married so I cannot agree with the whole "no kids before marriage" talk because to me that is a very limited view of family, as is the "man and woman" default. I really don't expect a straight couple in 2007 to include the notion of LGBTQ+ couples or family constellations in their considerations of what family should look like but I do wonder, after playing two queer characters, witnessing the legalization of gay marriage and watching their gay friends get married, if today's version of this advice written by them would be a little more inclusive.
There was also a section in one of Angela's chapters that was quite entrenched in purity politics, an aspect of Christianity I find straight-up harmful. I am in no way criticizing her choices and the intention behind them. In fact, I like them and can even relate to them for the most part. I feel bad reading about some of the things she was taught about sexuality, though. Especially having seen some of my Christian friends be genuinely triggered by similar rhetoric and struggling to return back to their usual selves and regain agency over their bodies and choices. All this to say that I am glad, even though Angela was taught these things, from what she wrote it doesn't seem like they hindered her quite as much from doing what was best for her and her sense of sexuality. In other words, my perception is that she has not let her spirituality, or rather the expectations the church often puts on its members, limit her agency over her own life and choices to her detriment the way I've seen it happen with some loved ones. And that was a relief to me.
I was going back and forth on whether I should give this book 4 or 5 stars. 5 because I love both of them so much as people and thought their story was very well-written. One star deducted because of some "advice"/stances I genuinely disagree with (and also a confusing amount of editing mistakes in the last part of the book).
I wish I could give 4 and a half because at the end of the day, I gained more from the book than it made me cringe. I can respect it for what it is and for the time when it was written. I appreciate this window into their usually quite private lives. And I'm pretty sure I will read it again at some point. So for now, I will stick with the 5 stars, I'm rounding up 😂
August 29, 2014
I am a big fan of Angela Bassett and I’ve seen Vance before but his presence in movies do not leave any memorable on my brains. In this book they each took alternate turns talking about their childhood up to when the two met and later fell in love.
I like love stories and found this two endearing. The two went through a series of failed relationships then they took stock, reflected on what their needs were and tried to improve themselves before embarking on another failed relationship. During their healing process they encountered each other although they had met each other at an earlier time.
It just goes to show that when you take time on yourself God will send you your soul mate in due time.
I found Vance to be an annoying young man but he has grown into a caring loving husband. A bit too caring if you ask me when he expresses how he puts his wife second after God. It was a bit repetitive but I guess he was trying to make a point.
I find Angela to be as sweet as she is depicted on the screens but she can be annoying with her constant referral of lack of a father growing up. I don’t know why people who have achieved a degree of success still mourn about a stupid man that was not there to hold their hands in childhood even though there were other relatives who picked up the slack.
It was a joy to read about their quest to become parents and how it became a reality.
However that put them on a preachy platform and they ended the book on a preachy note.
It does make a nice love story.
August 2, 2011
The choppy writing worked `like' magic, but what seals the love part of this story was when Angela was going on and on running her mouth, and Courtney was just sitting back trying to listen as he's also asking her to hold it down. Just too cute; especially when she couldn't `hold it down' and him sitting there thinking, `what do I have here!?!'... YET realizing this was the woman he wanted to marry! ...Exactly how true love works... `being yourself' and letting the chemistry (if it's present, which in their case it was), go thru its natural process.
A love story I'll always treasure and remember! Pragmatic, FUN, and a sassy but classy keeper!!!
A love story I'll always treasure and remember! Pragmatic, FUN, and a sassy but classy keeper!!!
March 10, 2013
One of the best books I have ever read in my LIFE! Met Angela Bassett almost 3 years ago, and she is just as wonderful in person as her words came across in this book. Learned SO much from reading this and gained so much wisdom from it (being I was in my early 20s when I read it). Main things I learned were take a lot of time to be alone to develop your principles & learn what you are capable of/can tolerate and expect there to be times that you want to give up when it's rough but know you can get through it. Their marriage adjustment and in vitro stories were very powerful to me. INCREDIBLE BOOK!
November 26, 2007
It's a feel good read. The book it not particularly literary and neither of the authors, Courtney or Angela, have above average skills when it comes to writing. But it's okay that they're not great writers. As the story progresses you hear their individual voices and begin to get lost in the story rather than flowery language. So if you want to read an endearing true love story, learn about acting, and the lives of these two individuals, this is the book for you.
March 2, 2008
A historical account of the loves and lives of Angela Bassett and Courtney Vance. Very detailed dissection of male/female relationships. Candids of other AA thespians and their connection to Angela and Courtney.
The book really chronicles the triumphs and challenges within their relationship as they both learned how to deal with each other's needs.
The book really chronicles the triumphs and challenges within their relationship as they both learned how to deal with each other's needs.
July 15, 2012
"....the book walks you through the lives of Angela and Courtney's from birth until their marriage. Their childhood stories give us an understanding of their adult personalities. I did enjoy their love story...good read...for a Sunday afternoon. But don't expect a NY Times Bestseller story...just a leisure read."
February 10, 2014
I bought and read this when it first came out. It's a really good memoir. She's always been one of my favorite actresses. I got to know Mr. Vance through the book. I had no idea she dated Charles S. Dutton, also a great actor and humanitarian. Courtney and Angela make such a good couple that now, I don't think of one without the other.
May 6, 2016
The relationship between Angela and Courtney is real. A man that will stop what he is doing, pull the car over, walk over to your side, kneel down, and ask you what is REALLY going on....just stops my heart!! Friendship -- understanding, respect, and communication -- these are the foundations of a TRUE love relationship.
September 12, 2010
I knew that it was told to someone and that someone helped the couple write the book. I do like the separate chapters so that the couple can each tell their POV as their love story was told. I was so happy for the couple for finding each other as well as creating a loving family.
August 24, 2011
I absolutely enjoyed reading this book. I appreciate the manner in which the stories were arranged. Every other chapter telling of a portion of Angela Basset and Courtney B. Vance's lives as individuals then giving a vividly colorful account of their shared life together.
August 26, 2012
I really enjoyed reading this book of love. While reading it I feel happy that two people could find each other among the circle of friends they. It was their destiny to find each other. I enjoyed how they came together to write their story. This is a good story.
June 21, 2013
I loved this story. I wish I had read it sooner. The advice they offer throughout their story is wonderful. Take it and apply it. I will! To God be the glory. I pray that he will continue to bless their relationship.
August 27, 2016
I liked the way the dual stories of Angela and Courtney combined into one, like their union...very sweet and uplifting. 4 stars despite the many typos.
January 7, 2008
I liked this book about their lives. It was interesting about how they grew up and met and how they are doing now.
January 17, 2008
It's always interesting to hear about how two people came together.
Read
March 7, 2008I love this couple
August 13, 2008
a fantastic true autobiography about soul mates and blessings
October 7, 2012
an encouraging read for those who are afraid to tackle ivy league, the world of acting or love.....
January 2, 2013
I had no idea Angela Bassett went to Yale or that Courtney Vance was the name of the actor from Law and Order. Sweet love story. Glad they found each other.
March 6, 2013
Great book!
September 12, 2014
Realness, Warmth, Awareness & Growth! A Beautiful Love Story!
March 31, 2016
Great Book!!! much respect for Angela Bassett and Husband they work hard in there careers and personal lives
March 28, 2016
a real love story written about themselves as told by themselves
August 15, 2012
It was a LONG but very interesting book about a friendship that grew into love.
September 5, 2017
I randomly picked this up at a flee market on vacation in college. Five years later I finally read it and there is much to take away from in this book. The authors are very relatable and spark self-reflecting questions about oneself's habits in their love life. If you are not God-fearing, you probably will not care for this book. It's very personal. It lays out their life journeys to love essentially leading to God. I thought it was beautiful. This book kinda changed my life. A great book for young people!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
April 6, 2022
I love Angela Bassett. I loved how this book talked about both her and Courtney's journeys as actors and led to eventually how they started their relationship. I'm not a religious person, so those parts of the book were a little heavy-handed to me, but overall, it was a nice read and definitely inspiring for me as an actor.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 35 reviews