XO

by Sara Rauch

Sara Rauch is in a long-term, committed relationship with another woman when she begins a low-residency MFA in fiction. Though it goes against the promises she's made, she finds herself pulled into an intense affair with a married man, a well-known writer in the program. More than an essay about bisexual infidelity and the resulting heartbreaks, XO unfolds Rauch's story like a map of psychic terrain, allowing the author to explore her longstanding obsessions with romantic love, personal faith and belief systems, and the stories we tell ourselves to get through our ever changing lives.

Genres: Memoir

137 pages, Kindle Edition

Published April 5, 2022

About the author

SARA RAUCH is the author of WHAT SHINES FROM IT: STORIES and the autobiographical essay XO. Her fiction and essays have appeared in Paper Darts, Paranoid Tree, Hobart, Split Lip, So to Speak, Qu, Lunch Ticket, and other literary magazines, as well as in the anthologies Dear John, I Love Jane; Best Lesbian Romance 2014; and She’s Lost Control. She has covered books for Bustle, BitchMedia, Curve Magazine, Lambda Literary, The Rumpus, and more. In 2012, she founded the literary magazine Cactus Heart, which ran through 2016. Sara teaches writing at Pioneer Valley Writers’ Workshop and Grub Street. She lives with her family in Massachusetts.

Reviews

[Lori]

I cannot express how excited I am to be partnering up with Sara for publicity on her new book! If you're interested in reviewing it, or interviewing Sara, please reach out with a DM!

[Rebecca · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sara Rauch won the Electric Book Award for her short story collection What Shines from It. This compact autobiographical parcel focuses on a point in her early thirties when she lived with a long-time female partner, “Piper”, and had an intense affair with “Liam”, a fellow writer she met at a residency.

“no one sets out in search of buried treasure when they’re content with life as it is”

“Longing isn’t cheating (of this I was certain), even when it brushes its whiskers against your cheek.”

Adultery is among the most ancient human stories we have, a fact Rauch acknowledges by braiding through the narrative her musings on religion and storytelling by way of her Catholic upbringing and interest in myths and fairy tales. She’s looking for the patterns of her own experience and how endings make way for new life. The title has multiple meanings: embraces, crossroads and coming full circle. Like a spider’s web, her narrative pulls in many threads to make an ordered whole. All through, bisexuality is a baseline, not something that needs to be interrogated.

This reminded me of a number of books I’ve read about short-lived affairs – Tides, The Instant – and about renegotiating relationships in a queer life – The Fixed Stars, In the Dream House – but felt most like reading a May Sarton journal for how intimately it recreates daily routines of writing, cooking, caring for cats, and weighing up past, present and future. Lovely stuff.

Originally published on my blog, Bookish Beck.

[Carol Hutchinson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Insightful, honest, and raw

Sara’s memoir follows her journey of being in a relationship a woman only to find herself in an affair with a married man on the same writing program.

I was instantly intrigued by Sara’s memoir, it is very honest, exploring everything Sara experienced and bravely sharing it all with us. It is always fascinating to get a glimpse of someone else’s experience in such a way, and I feel very honoured that Sara wanted to share. There is a lot of representation in Sara’s memoir, a bisexual experience that many can probably relate to, which was nice to read about and it is really appreciated Sara has shared so much.

It was quite the emotional journey, lots of feelings ignited by different experiences that were deep, poetic in many ways, soul searching accounts of snippets and moments that were private and felt quite sentimental.

A really interesting and intriguing read, that was very educational in many ways but also empowering, so I definitely recommend.

[angel ☆*:.｡. · Rating 3 out of 5]

I did feel like Piper and Sara did have a cute relationship but soon started to fall apart. I felt like Piper was being inconsiderate of Sara when Piper expected Sara to depose of her personal belongings when it started to become a bother for Piper. I couldn't quite wrap my head around the reason why Piper decided to have an affair with a MARRIED MAN, THAT HAS KIDS. She claimed to love Piper, yet decided to STILL have an affair with Liam. It was quite hypercritical of Sara to expect Piper to come crawling back to her when they ended their relationship. I did tend to skip some parts due to Sara referencing other texts in her book. I also unfortunately skipped the ending during her "healing stage"

[Not Sarah Connor Writes · Rating 2 out of 5]

Needless to say this memoir wasn't for me. I had trouble understanding Rauch recalling her affair without much ownership or understanding as to why she did it except that she loves intensely. Some interesting thoughts but the whole thing felt a bit too scattered and inconsistent.

Read the full review on my blog!

[Joy Deva Baglio · Rating 4 out of 5]

Captivating in its forthrightness and honesty, Rauch's memoir brilliantly braids philosophical insights and musings on growth with descriptions of an affair. About the complexities of romantic relationships, but also about human growth and outgrowing and shedding of old skins. I couldn't put this book down!

[ThatBeMeDiana · Rating 4 out of 5]

Sara Rauch has a way with being vulnerable and drawing out the desperateness of wanting to be in a high energy love. The essays were beautiful and simple and showcased perfectly her emotions throughout her journey. She broaches the topic of bisexuality in her own way - being in a committed relationship with a women then embracing an affair with a married man. The writing is intricate and easy to read. It teaches it readers about love, spirituality, and more.

[Christine · Rating 5 out of 5]

I could not put this book down and had a chance to interview the author recently for ZYZZYVA literary magazine:
https://www.zyzzyva.org/2022/04/12/si...

Rauch writes with sensitivity and straightforwardness about a turbulent time in her life when she began a love affair with a man while in a serious relationship with a woman.

[Lee Biase · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sara Rauch is a beautiful writer. Her memoir XO was honest and relatable with a nice flow that gave you the perfect amount of details to visualize her story and bring all the characters to life. She has a poetic way to her writing that makes you want to slow down to enjoy every word she carefully chose. I would definitely recommend reading it.