Am I Alone in Thinking...?

Unpublished Letters to The Daily Telegraph #1

by Iain Hollingshead

Readers of the 'brilliant Telegraph Letters page', as Ian Hislop recently lauded it, will be fondly aware of the eclectic combination of learned wisdom, wistful nostalgia and robust good sense that characterise its correspondence. But what of the 95 per cent of the paper's huge postbag which never sees the light of day? Some of the best letters inevitably arrive too late for the 24/7 news cycle, or don't quite fit with the rest of the day's selection. Others are just a little too whimsical, or indeed too risque, to publish in a serious newspaper. And more than a few are completely and utterly (and wonderfully) mad, such as the missives you'll find within these pages from someone who signs himself merely as "M", and believes himself to be the head of MI6. Now, the Telegraph gives the authors of these unpublished letters the stage at last. Baffled, furious, defiant, mischievous, they inveigh and speculate on every subject under the sun, from the rubbish on television these days to the venality of our MPs, from Kate Winslet's decolletage to this country's unhealthy obsession with marmalade. All those Telegraph readers who wondered if anyone else had noticed that the lunatics had finally taken over the asylum and sat down to write to their favourite newspaper to test the waters - they need howl into the void no longer. They are not alone.

Genres: Nonfiction, Humor

192 pages, Hardcover

First published October 1, 2009

About the author

Iain writes feature articles for a range of publications, The Daily Telegraph in particular. Until recently, he also wrote a regular column called Loose Ends in Saturday's Guardian. He has taken part in a number of radio shows, including BBC Radio 4's Today programme and You and Yours.

His father is a GP and his mother is a surgeon. He has one elder brother. He went to Eton from 1993-98. Iain graduated from Cambridge University in 2003 with a first class degree in History. He worked for a year in Westminster - at Vote 2004 and the private office of Michael Howard - before pursuing a full-time career as a journalist. Vote 2004 was described in the Sunday Telegraph as the "most successful political campaign of all time". Iain was runner-up in the Guardian Student Media Awards as Columnist of the Year. While at university he also founded and edited The Cambridge Slapper - a popular satirical magazine.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iain_Ho...

Reviews

[Harry Whitewolf · Rating 2 out of 5]

SIR –

Am I alone in thinking the “Unpublished Letters to The Daily Telegraph” should have remained unpublished?

I don’t read The Telegraph and I seldom read coffee-table books. In fact, I don’t even have a coffee table, but I did somehow manage to read this book without one. Of course, this is a cash-in, Telegraph-promoting assortment of readers’ letters to the newspaper’s Letters Page, so one knows what to expect before even picking up the book. However, I had also presumed the content would be a lot funnier than it was, as it’s often the case that the unknown humble British letter-writer can craft funnier pieces than professional so-called journalists. Instead, I discovered letters that made me smile at most, and even that was rare. Only two actually made me laugh out loud. Indeed, humour seemed to take a backseat in preference of upper-class bigotry and egotistical self-congratulation by readers with double-barrelled names who despair at the UK’s identity not being permanently stuck in the 1920s. Many of these letters are little different than the sorts of misinformed comments one can find written by louts under Yahoo UK news articles. The only difference is middle-and-upper-class, Telegraph-reading, immigrant-hating, southern-centred, Empire-loving middle-Englanders know how to use apostrophes correctly.

At least this book has reminded me why I don’t read The Telegraph.

Harold Whitewolf-Smythe, Fuckem-Upon-Thames.


p.s. Adding insult to injury, the p.s. section of the book includes letters from some of the people who are published in this book, thanking Mr. Hollingshead for his letter informing them that their letters are to be published in “Am I Alone in Thinking…?” Two of the people replying say they would of course be happy to purchase a copy of the book when it is published. What a way to make some cash! Fill a book with unpaid novice writers and then charge them to buy a copy. The Telegraph should enter into the world of self-published anthologies.

p.p.s. You would be much better off spending your money on The Anti-Austerity Anthology, which I co-edited. The contributors of that book were also unpaid, but so were the editors, and all proceeds go to charity. And it’s a much better reflection of what most British people really think.

[Margaret Galbraith · Rating 4 out of 5]

Written letter around 13 years ago and I can remember hearing about some of it. It’s typical British Wit at its best with ‘tongue in cheek humour’. All in all a very good outlook of what was going in and what was in the news at the time. Written by the people who were living through those times makes this even more special.

[Kanchan Mandanekar · Rating 5 out of 5]

Outstanding book! The classic Brit wit was very enjoyable. Some lines were hard hitting and had the tendency to stay on my mind for long, and some other lines were vocabulary altering and enriched my bank of expressions. Lovely book!

[abi slade]

(no official rating because reading this predated my 2024 rating system)

Cannot remember the specifics but can remember the giggles!

[Amy · Rating 1 out of 5]

I guess you have to be an avid reader of the Daily Telegraph to understand a lot of these, which I'm not. Some of the people who wrote the letters published in this book need to get a day job that doesn't include writing to moan about how other people talk on TV... There were a few funny ones but honestly I'm glad to have finished this book.

[Theediscerning · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ten years old it may be, but still as funny as the proverbial. Semi-literate, self-opinionated numpties more recently got Dave Gorman and a string quartet to accompany their comments to the world and that small proportion of it that was listening; this is classy enough to not need music - just the sound of laughter it brings with it.

[Fiona McCusker · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 stars. Picked this up at a charity shop as I'd laughed a lot at the 2nd book in the series many years ago. However, a lot of the subject matter is a bit dated now and, despite trying to ignore the political views, I found some of the readers' comments a bit irritating. That said, some of them were quite amusing and did put a smile on my face.

[Lysergius · Rating 4 out of 5]

Another volume of mildly funny unpublished letters to the Telegraph compiled by Iain Hollingshead.

[Scott · Rating 2 out of 5]

Reasonable but not particularly rewarding. In places quite dull and tedious. Presumably, that was the reason many of these letters would never have made it for publication

[Alison Halliday · Rating 5 out of 5]

Highly entertaining. A slice of British life and the thoughts of British people. Recommended.

[Teresa Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

These books are always good. I have read loads and the are very funny.

[^ · Rating 3 out of 5]

I very much enjoyed this curious book, which is, as forewarned on the dust jacket, an eclectic mixture of excellent letters which (sadly) missed the boat, the odd, and the extraordinarily peculiar. All in all, this anthology make for a very informative and educative example of both what NOT to waste time writing, and what TO write – with perfect timing. I think that I spotted two letters from a friend of mine. Should I mention that to him? Thankfully both clearly fell in a great letter wrong time / great letter no space on the page category.

I thought it very intelligent of the ‘Telegraph’ NOT to imitate ‘The Times’ by publishing strings of brief correspondence.

Definitely a Good Book to place on a bookshelf in a guest bedroom; but also to have closer to hand if unwell and laid-up in bed.

[Roger · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is full of unpublished letters to the editor of the Daily Telegraph, many of them very funny. My favourite was written in response to published letters concerning whether owners resembled their dogs. The correspondent wrote - "Sir - I resent being told that, as a dog owner, I look like my pets. We have a brown Labrador and Jack Russell. I do not resemble either of them. I look like an Alsatian."

[Norah · Rating 3 out of 5]

A Christmas present from ? Light reading. As in pretty good condition, may keep as a Xmas present for someone this year!!

Dipped into this and its still waiting for someone who might like it. Released via bookcrossing at Helens Bay Golf club, caught by anonymous finder, who 'really enjoyed reading it'!

[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

If you have a wet afternoon to enliven then look no further. The clever and the strange have taken up their pens and splurged their inky views throughout this book. I’d recommend reading this when you don’t know what you want to read, it covers an eclectic range of topics.

[Emily · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hollingshead, insightful and ironic in himself, has done a marvelous job in encompassing the nation's wit and quirkiness in one book.

[Annie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hilarious! Alas, sometimes the very Britishness of the subjects misses the mark for those without the background.

[Janine · Rating 3 out of 5]

A lot of fun. It makes you realise that there is a large section of society who are deeply, deeply weird. Especially the MI6 pretender from Brizzle.

[Ruud Kuiper · Rating 1 out of 5]

An entire book with people complaing about stuff... I'd made it halfway trough when I decided i'd had enough of all this negativity.

[Iain Hamilton · Rating 4 out of 5]

A delight from start to finish. Tells you more about Telegraph readers than you could hope to know or they would wish to reveal.

[Andy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Riotous! A brilliant read. Angry from Tunbridge Wells lives on...

[Alison Brownlee · Rating 4 out of 5]

I picked this boom up as a light coffee book read while I was on a shift at work. And I must say it did the job there was some really funny bits and some downright odd.

[Simon · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some entertaining letters, but also lots which show intolerance

[David Highton · Rating 3 out of 5]

Gently humourous