Ten Years: a Journal of the Heart, a Memoir

by Michael Halfhill

Ten Years, A Journal of the Heart is written in the style of a journal in first person. The story spans the years 1980 to 1990, and of one man's ten year search for true love in a decade where unbridled sex was rampant, and where, in the 1980s, AIDS began its death march across the US.

210 pages, Paperback

Published December 1, 2022

Reviews

[Nathanael Key · Rating 5 out of 5]

***A Powerful Introspective Journey of Self-discovery***

Let me start by saying, this is not an easy story to read for the weak of heart. I met Michael Halfhill through our author connections, and he mentioned this story in passing. I’ll also add, this isn’t a “mm romance”, but more memoir (as the title suggests) and generally follows the contemporary style. 

What Halfhill accomplishes in his story is absolutely astounding. I found at times, it was almost too much to turn the page! The author does not shy away from the realities of the 1980s, which includes all the ups and downs of the times. No gay man’s story taking place in the 80s would be complete without an introspective look into the crisis of the day—an unfortunate illness that affected and claimed so many wonderful lives. But this is not the primary focus of the story. 

Mr. Halfhill beautifully captures the essence of the decade that brought us Madonna, New Coke, big hair, MTV, neon colors in fashion (among many other things), as he tells a story that highlights his Sisyphean search for love—one that balances perfectly on the societal cusp of sin and the brink of acceptance.

The narrator will sometimes leave you wanting more, but keep turning the pages and your curiosity will be rewarded. I enjoyed the adventures described throughout the narrative and could easily put myself in his shoes. Prepare yourself, because there are a few heartbreaking scenes, but what story is complete without those? There is also healing come the end. 

One of my absolute favorite lines in the book: “Old face, forever young and safe in memory, and soft whispers promising the moon are the stuff of secret smiles.”

To summarize: “Ten Years” is much more than a book. It’s a journey through the 1980s, told through the eyes of a vulnerable man in his thirties. The authentic descriptions of people and places will transform the reader and allow them to visualize and feel everything as if being there in the character’s shoes. For many, this is an experience they won’t soon forget. And Now I have to read it again!

I highly recommend reading Michael Halfhill’s work. He’s a brilliant storyteller and one I’m honored to support.

[Russell Sanders · Rating 5 out of 5]

I have no idea if Ten Years: a Journal of the Heart, a Memoir is fiction or, indeed, author Michael Halfhill’s autobiography with characters renamed to protect the innocent (or guilty, as the case may be.) What I do know is that it is utterly believable and the scenes here could have truly happened. Halfhill writes sparely and elegantly as he weaves the tales of the love encounters of his main character Christopher over a period of ten years. Christopher loves often and well, even though his adventures do not pan out for him in his quest to find a permanent partner. Christopher is intelligent, well-read and well-spoken, cultured and sensitive. That he seems to take his failures in stride and learn from them is the heart of the book. And this book has so much heart! Halfhill chooses his words carefully and uses them as brush strokes to paint a picture of a gay life, a life where Christopher is constantly adventuring—for this is also a lovely travelogue—in search, and while not finding what he searches for in vain, he still seems happy to continue the quest. Gay novels are obligated, it seems, to include graphic sex scenes. What I love about Halfhill’s book is that while his characters do indeed have sex, it is like the old movies where the camera pans through a window or into the clouds when the steam starts rising. Graphic scenes, I feel, would have totally destroyed the delicacy of the telling. This book, covering as the titled “ten years” tells us, is a special decade, the decade in which AIDS ravaged the gay population. So Christopher’s story is not only a poignant one, but also one of survival amidst tragedy and danger. I cannot praise this book too highly. It is simply a lovely reading experience. I end this with a quote from the novel that is exquisite: “Old faces, forever young and safe in memory, and soft whispers promising the moon are the stuff of secret smiles.” Ah-h-h.

[James Weems · Rating 5 out of 5]

This novel runs a mere 160 pages including the cover. That said, it punches way above its weight. The novel covers the decade of the 1980s, a massive undertaking. The author covers the years and events in the life of his protagonist, a gay man navigating the “me” era. We get the highs and lows of a single guy looking for love.
Given the weightier issues which occurred during the decade, I expected a somber or sad book. I assure you, it had its sad and somber moments, but there was also humor, affection, and even glimpses of love during the book. It’s not a comedy, it’s not a tragedy, but there are equal measures of sorrow and hilarity.
The author is a master at wordcraft; his choices of situations and conversations sparkle with the personalities involved. The scenes covering AIDS were amazing. Having lived through that period myself, I read “between the lines” as the mystery plague slowly, then forcefully, revealed itself. It’s one of the best treatments of that period that I’ve ever read.
I could go through every chapter and analyze it or comment on it, but I would rather suggest that you pick up a copy of the novel and read it yourself. This book’s a firm FIVE STARS for me. I highly recommend it.

[Jacob Alan · Rating 5 out of 5]

With this memoir you get about as real a look as is possible at one man's life. With an astounding attention to detail coupled with writing that is as descriptive as it is a wonder to read this story is filled with all of the love, loss, and learning one can hope for in life. With many lessons to learn and a message that can be appreciated by everyone this story was an absolute treat to read.

[Jerry Painter · Rating 3 out of 5]

A lot of adventures and a very quick ending that probably needed more time.