Toffee: Wie Glücklichsein von außen aussieht

by Sarah Crossan

In ihrem neuen Jugendroman erzählt die preisgekrönte Autorin Sarah Crossan von einer Freundschaft über Generationen hinweg. Die 15-jährige Allison ist von zu Hause abgehauen und würde ihr altes Leben am liebsten vergessen. Unterschlupf findet sie bei Marla, die nach und nach die Erinnerung an sich selbst verliert. Marla hält die unerwartete Besucherin für ihre Jugendfreundin Toffee. Und Allison, die sonst nirgendwohin kann, schlüpft in diese Rolle. Gemeinsam kochen und tanzen sie, gehen zum Strand, kümmern sich umeinander. Und Allison begreift, was es bedeutet, eine richtige Familie zu haben. Ein intensiver Roman über die Kraft, für sich und andere einzustehen.

Genres: Poetry, Young Adult, Contemporary, Fiction, Mental Health, Realistic Fiction, Family

352 pages, Paperback

First published March 6, 2019

About the author

Sarah Crossan is Irish. She graduated with a degree in Philosophy and Literature before training as an English and Drama teacher at Cambridge University and worked to promote creative writing in schools before leaving teaching to write full time.

She completed her Masters in Creative Writing at the University of Warwick in 2003 and in 2010 received an Edward Albee Fellowship for writing.

She currently lives in NYC.

Reviews

[Kai Spellmeier · Rating 4 out of 5]

"I liked the idea of being
sweet and hard,
a girl with a name for people
to chew on.
A girl who could break teeth."

Toffee is a great one. It's my second Sarah Crossan novel and even though it was slightly less perfect than Moonrise, I loved it a little more. First of all, I love the feeling of flying through a book and because this is written in verse, you can read it in no time. It feels simplistic and meaningful at once. Often you don't need many words to express a feeling. The emotions will hit you just as hard. So even though I felt that some of the plot was unrealistic or straight up did not make sense, I felt for these characters. It was a reflective, quiet, sad and occasionally funny book. I loved it. The ending was somewhat confusing though. It felt rushed and not exactly logical.

No matter how many books I read about domestic abuse, I am always surprised by how poisonous and toxic it is. It is never just about being physically harmed. It's about being made to believe that one deserves it, that it was one's own fault, that it only happened out of love. That's why I find books like Toffee or What Momma Left Me or Deposing Nathan so important. They find a way to show you that abuse is a disease and that it is never the victim's fault.

Find more of my books on Instagram

[April (Aprilius Maximus) · Rating 4 out of 5]

[trigger warnings are listed at the bottom of this review and may contain spoilers]

★★★★

this was so sadddddd :( but also kinda hopeful? but wow, this definitely tugged at my heartstrings!

trigger warnings: loss of a parent (in the past), domestic abuse and violence, dementia, homelessness, sexual harassment from a random creepy dude, drugs and alcohol, shitty friends, being attacked by a dog, mention of dog being put down, animal death (wild bird and pet goldfish).

Thank you to bloomsbury for the review copy!

[8stitches 9lives · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was such an original book and due to that, it was right up my street. It's a unique read which uses a poetic format and structure to tell the profoundly moving story of Allison and Marla whose paths cross inexplicably and they grow to become close despite the substantial age gap between them. Two different generations finding comfort in one another was heart-warming and as the story highlights issues both generations go experience it was topical, thought-provoking and intensely compelling. I simply can't wait to read the entirety of it.

The award-winning and critically acclaimed Ms Crossan is a masterfully storyteller and this verse novel has all the hallmarks of a tour de force. You can tell exactly how talented she is even from this short excerpt. An emotional, visceral and all-powerful tale that explores issues of mental health, illness, the fallibility of memory, the importance of support, friendship, comfort and the family ties that bind us all. Superb. Many thanks to Bloomsbury Publishing for an ARC.

[Avani ✨ · Rating 4 out of 5]

I am truly never moved so much!
I love reading poetry and verse novel so much and this one was also good.
I love Elizabeth Acevedo's book and I guess now Sarah Crossan is also coming in that list.
I enjoyed reading her latest novel "Here Is The Beehive" as well.

[Alice-Elizabeth (Prolific Reader Alice) · Rating 4 out of 5]

A powerful novel in verse that really made me think. I sat back and did nothing but contemplate just how difficult can be sometimes and reading Toffee made me seriously realise it!

A young girl called Allison has left her toxic home environment and finds herself a runaway, crossing paths with an elderly lady who has dementia and staying in her home to keep her company. The rest of the lady's family doesn't know about Allison's existence. All she has ever wanted to be is happy. The verse format made the story pacing very quick, but could still experience the messages and attitudes that were coming across. I found myself really rooting for Allison, as she struggled to come to terms with her past and making new friends who weren't really the best role models. Will definitely be reading more by this author!

[not my high · Rating 5 out of 5]

Moja nowa ulubiona książka.

Deszcz, samotność, zapach starszej pani, ocean, graty w każdym koncie, przeszłość i

Pierwszy oddech
Nowe życie
Nowa tożsamość

Nie potrafię pisać o tej książce, ale się postaram na Wasz użytek na IG

TW przemøcowy dom, ucieczka z domu

[Dee · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a brilliant read! My first also of a verse novel and i loved it.
What a story, what an impact! This is a young adult novel that does not shy away from some serious issues.

The story is in part so lovely. The friendship between Allison and martha. One has lost her way and the other has run away.
Allison then seeks refuge in a garden shed which ends up her visiting and staying within the house. The lady turns out to have dementia and thinks she is a friend from her past.

Slowly it is revealed why she has run away and the issues she faces at home. she tells us of how she feels throughout and you can imagine how it must affect a person being in that situation. You really get a good sence of her loneliness and heartbreak throughout. Both of these people are lost in their own way.

A heartwarming read.

[El · Rating 5 out of 5]

I wasn’t going to read this book but then I saw it in the library & thought ‘why not?’
*story of my life*

Honestly, how could I ever have even considered not reading a Sarah Crossan?!
I just love the way she writes & not just the tone but the format!

And she always makes me cry - which is a good thing in these cases! 😭

But so, so, so sweet & it’s crazy how attached you get to the characters when you can read the book pretty quick.

Anyway, I’m off to follow Sarah Crossan because I hadn’t before now - why?! Idk

[teach_book · Rating 3 out of 5]

Nie trafia do ulubionych książek Crossan, ale porusza bardzo ważne tematy - dzieciństwo pełne bólu, brak miłości ze strony rodzica, brak poczucia własnej wartości, przemijanie.

[Kobi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Trigger warning for child abuse and homelessness.

Sarah Crossan does it again.

This book is told in verse, which is typical of Crossan, and it's clear that it's her area of expertise. This story was so charming and hopeful and heartwarming, which is quite different to my last read of hers, Moonrise, which was almost the complete opposite. Toffee follows a young girl named Allison after running away from her abusive father and rooming with an older woman, Marla, who has dementia and mistakes Allison for an old friend, Toffee. This book follows them getting to know each other over and over again, while Allison tries to figure out what she's going to do with her freedom and looming homelessness. Each of the characters in this book were so loveable and I only wanted what was best for them. Allison and Marla's friendship was pure and beautiful, and it was the highlight of this book for me. I think this book is more suited to a 'younger' YA audience, but I know everyone can get something out of this. I've really grown to love Crossan's work, and I hope to pick up her back-catalogue and anything she releases in the future! Would definitely recommend this one.

[Mim_farahani · Rating 4 out of 5]

باز هم سارا کروسان و غمی که کتاب‌هاش در دل آدم به جا میذاره.

[Mewa · Rating 3 out of 5]

„Tata ciągle kazał mi
dorosnąć
pospieszyć się
zamknąć się
przestać być dzieckiem
przestać ryczeć
przestać jęczeć
zachowywać się poważniej
zachowywać się jak dorosła
przestać się mazać —
jakby
dzieciństwo było wykroczeniem,
którego można nie popełniać."

Opowieść napisana uczuciami. O przemocy psychicznej oraz fizycznej. Szukaniu siebie, gubieniu się i odnajdywaniu. Demencji czy pięknie przyjaźni pomimo różnicy wieku. Próbach przetrwania i zawalczenia o siebie. Łzach, które nie potrafią wypłynąć. Relacjach sztucznych oraz tych, które naprawdę coś znaczą. Granicach tego, ile bólu możemy znieść. Chęci zniknięcia. Marzeniu o odnalezienia kolorów.

W młodzieżówkach Sarah Crossan czuć pewną naiwność, ale zamiast odejmować powieściom uroku — dodaje im go. Dzięki temu wszystko wydaje się być... odrobinę lżejsze. Na tyle, że zamiast dusić się łzami po prostu płaczę. Oto jak działają na mnie książki tej autorki. Mają w sobie wiele pięknych uczuć, a bohaterowie i relacje od razu łapią mnie za serce. W dodatku całość napisana jest wierszem i to takim, który fantastycznie działa na moją wrażliwość, choć jest on naprawdę prosty, co oceniam na plus. Ogromny plus!

Póki co „Toffi" jest najsłabszą powieścią autorki, jaką przeczytałam, ale wciąż mi się podobała i wciąż mogę ją innym polecić. Po prostu ma w sobie jeszcze więcej naiwności, ale przybiera ona kształt słodkości. Jest więc momentami naprawdę ciepło i przyjemnie, choć przecież książka wręcz tonie w bólu. Oto moje ulubione połączenie!

przekł. Małgorzata Glasenapp

[Axellesbooks · Rating 3 out of 5]

It's a nice story to read, but felt unrealistic to me. It's hard to really connect to characters when its written in free verse, so maybe these kind of books aren't really a thing for me?
Marla is my favourite character though

[Kelly (Diva Booknerd) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Allison Daniels is searching for a place to stay, discovering what she believes is a vacant outbuilding on an abandoned property to rest her weary body. Compelled to find her former stepmother and the only person who understands the abusive and adverse environment inflicted upon Allison, her meagre possessions are stolen and determined not to return to her abusive father, seeks shelter on the dilapidated property.

Allison is a family violence survivor, her father a neglectful and abusive man since the passing of his wife moments after delivering Allison. As a child, Allison learnt to become independent from a young age and through parental neglect, begun caring for her father and the household. In a series of revolving partners, it was Kelly Anne who befriended Allison while dating her father, soon becoming a companion and confidant for Allison. Unable to withstand the abuse and manipulation, Kelly Anne abandons the family home and Allison, who now endures the constant anger of her father. Her experience is profoundly resonating and I empathised with Allison and the anguish family violence inflicts upon victims.

Marla is an elderly woman with dementia and owns the neglected property. Lonely and confused, she mistakes Allison for her childhood friend Toffee and despite Allison insisting otherwise, she understands the fragility of Marla's condition and allows her to believe she's the childhood companion Marla desperately needs. Marla is representative of our elderly communities, the forgotten and often neglected members of society. Marla is a dementia patient and although she experiences moments of clarity, she regresses to a simpler time, reminiscent of her years as a sprightly young woman. I can imagine Marla as a confident and flirtatious young woman and in her moments of clarity, she's incredibly joyous and endearing. As the narrative progresses, we're introduced to her carer who is seemingly only interested in performing a elemental service, her son is abusive, degrading Marla and creating an environment where Marla is agitated and frightened.

Throughout the narrative, Allison and Marla become friends and although at times Marla is bewildered at the new living arrangements, they begin to care and cherish one another's company. My heart ached for Marla and I could sympathise with Allison's decision to allow Marla to believe she was her once childhood friend. Marla seemingly felt more at ease and it allowed her to become the spirited and adventurous young woman she once was. Toffee also encourages the discussion of themes rarely referenced in young adult literature, dementia, the negligent attitude towards the senior members of our communities, abuse, abandonment and impoverishment.

Poignant, compelling and achingly beautiful, Toffee is a delicate and tender verse narrative of compassion and companionship. Essential reading.

[Marieke | Marieke's Books · Rating 3 out of 5]

Neem een kijkje op Marieke's Books voor de volledige recensie.
Hmm, ik weet het niet zo goed.. Dit boek behandelt belangrijke onderwerpen, dat zeker. En het is ook goed uitgewerkt. Toch miste ik iets. Ik had me helemaal voorbereid op een super emotioneel boek, net zoals Een van haar, maar ik miste dat gevoel. Misschien komt dat ook wel doordat ik dit boek in 3 delen gelezen heb ipv achter elkaar door.

Toffee is geen slecht boek, dat zeker niet! Maar ik ben bang dat de magie van de vrije versvorm misschien ook een beetje voorbij is. Het is niet nieuw meer en ik had het gevoel dat het nu niet zoveel impact had als in haar andere boeken.

[Emma · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5/5 Stars

This book tackles some serious issues using a poetic formal, the one I got to know and expect from Sarah Crossan's books.

The main character, Allison, has just escaped an abusive home and finds herself in a city far away from her own and with nowhere to go. This is until she realizes that Marla, an old lady with dementia, lives alone. The two of them start living together and develop a wonderful friendship by giving each other what they desperately need: attention and care. It was truly heartbreaking to read some of the memories from Allison's past and also to see Marla in the moments when she truly felt most lost.
The ending was okay, but I would have liked to see more of it.

[Muffinsandbooks · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ça n’est pas mon préféré de l’autrice mais c’est hyper doux et beau et touchant et plein de poésie... une très belle lecture !

[Fahime · Rating 5 out of 5]

چقدر دلنشین و زیبا بود.
واقعا از خوندنش لذت بردم.

[spokój.w.głowie · Rating 4 out of 5]

4,25/5 ✨
Łoł, ewidentnie nie jest to książka dla młodszych czytelników, ale jest przepiękna, jak dla mnie bije Tippi i ja na głowę.
Cieszę się, że przeczytałam, chociaż teraz będę o niej dużo myśleć.

[Sara · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed this novel in verse about a runaway teen and a woman living, on her own, with dementia. I'm not normally a fan of poetry, yet Sarah Crossan is able to make the words feel as though they're written as prose while keeping it feel of the poetry intact. The story doesn't shy away from showing some of the harsher aspects of reality, which contrasted sharply with the pretty words on the page. Toffee felt gritty and honest.

At times I did think this needed fleshing out more, and it got quiet repetitive at times with not a whole lot going on, hence the 3 stars. Overall though I thought this was an interesting way to tell this story.

[madame Gabrielle · Rating 4 out of 5]

Allison est forte sans bon sens et débrouillarde. Elle est une jeune fille à laquelle on s’attache rapidement et pour laquelle on ne veut que le meilleur. j’ai adoré Marla, Allison et Kelly-Anne et j’en ai voulu vraiment au père d’Allison tout au long de l’histoire. pourtant, la violence et la maltraitance sont des sujets qui doivent être abordés pour être dénoncés. puis, quand je dis que la littérature pour adolescent peut convenir à n’importe quel adulte; alors — dans le cas de cette histoire — cela prend tout son sens. à lire absolument!

[MariaWitBook · Rating 5 out of 5]

Such a beautiful beautiful way of storytelling! This will be definitely one of my favourite books ever! Would love to see a illustrated edition. Thank you for such a beautiful book.

[BookNightOwl · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thank you Bloomsbury YA and Netgalley for providing an ARC of this book in exchange for an honest review.

Allison has never known her real mom but she feels like her mom did love her since she carried her for 9 months. Allison's father on the other hand physically and mentally abuses her and one day she runs away and meets Marla. Marla has dementia and finds Allison hiding in her shed and mistakes her for somebody named Toffee. As this story progresses Allison realizes that Marla needs her as much as she needs Marla. Written in verse this story will suck you in quickly and make you sad and happy all at the same time.

[Sepideh Bahri · Rating 5 out of 5]

چیزی به اسم خداحافظی تا ابد وجود ندارد
مگر آنکه
بتوانید تمام آنچه را که از یک نفر می‌دانستید
و تمام آنچه را که از وجودش حس کرده‌اید
پاک کنید.

[Brooklyn Tayla · Rating 5 out of 5]

I picked this up on a whim when I was at my local Dymocks bookstore, after seeing it float around on bookstagram and being intrigued by the Sypnosis! Aside from that, though, I didn’t know what to expect!
What I didn’t imagine was how moved I would be by this book! It was so addictive, I couldn’t put it down! I found the unique way that Sarah Crossan composed this book was so eloquent and raw, I just found myself being so affected!
The writing was just so lyrical and powerful, I couldn’t not feel lots! Allison, the main character, is trying so hard to forget her devastating past and start anew, but she’s struggling so much! The story jumps back and forth to the present and twines into the past, where Allie and the reader are made to relive the sheer pain and abuse that darling Allison went through, bearing the sheer blunt of her Father’s trauma. I found it so harrowing, reading what young Allie went through and it just was so hard to read, it really tugged at my heartstrings!
In turn, I also found Toffee’s core friendship (that between Allie, who slowly finds herself taking on the alias of the titular name, a dear friend of the aged Marla, who mistakes Allie for her friend, Toffee). As Allie reveals, she doesn’t have anywhere to go and she slips into the role, the identity of Toffee. It was so emotional! The friendship that bloomed between the two of them, the young girl with nowhere to go or any family (she had to get away from her Dad, as his girlfriend did, Kelly-Anne, who Allie cherished and vice versa), and the aging Marla, who finds herself struggling to remember little details of her life, often even forgetting who Allie is, even after mistaking her for her old friend! The bond that unfolds between them is so gorgeous and I’m so so happy I decided to pick up this book, I definitely will be seeking out Sarah Crossan’s other books asap!

[Kayleigh · Rating 4 out of 5]

Toffee is a beautifully written book and the fact that it’s written in verse makes it even more captivating.
The poetry style of this book doesn’t at all take away from the story.
Allison and Marla meet through the most unusual of circumstances and somehow become incredibly close despite the huge difference in age.
It’s an incredibly heartwarming read about two lonely, isolated people who somehow find friendship and comfort in each other and I can’t recommend this book enough.

Thank you Bloomsbury for providing me with a review copy!

[Marie the Librarian · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think Sarah might be one of my fave authors. The way she writes, the subjects, the characters, the emotions, my poor heart cant take it and I love it. Her prose packs such a punch.

[Teu · Rating 5 out of 5]

حس خوب و لطیفی بهم القا کرد و به قدری برام روان و جذاب بود که یک نفس بخونم و تمومش کنم...

به این عادت دارم؛
به دروغ گفتن و دیدن اینکه
چطور مردم نفس راحتی می‌کشند
از اینکه قرار نیست دل‌نگران باشند.
- صفحه ۷۰

اگر دوست‌داشتنی بودن هم یادگرفتنی بود
مثل یادگرفتن پیانو
یا صرف افعال،
در برگه‌ی ارزیابی من نوشته می‌شد:
باید بیشتر تلاش کنی.
- صفحه ۱۴۵

کسی چه می‌داند در ذهن دیگران چه می‌گذرد؛
چه غصه‌هایی را فرو داده‌اند
یا دفنشان کرده‌اند؟
- صفحه ۲۰۲

اهل خودکشی نیستم
اما روزهایی هست که من
دوست ندارم
«باشم.»
ادامه دادن.
خیلی سخت است.
- صفحه ۳۷۸

می‌گویم: تو یه‌وقت‌هایی خودتی و یه‌وقت‌هایی نیستی.»
می‌خندد.
«درسته، اما مگه همه‌مون همینطوری نیستیم؟»
- صفحه ۴۰۲

[Bridget · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow, what a start. So keen to read the rest of the book. Will definitely buy it for my students. I’ll buy anything by Sarah Crossan and I have a boys school library, she is always a hit. Can’t wait to read the whole book.

[Paradise · Rating 5 out of 5]

فقط بخونیدش=)
ولی قول نمی‌دم بعد از تموم کردنش قلبتون درد نگیره=)