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Pray. Think. Act.: Make Better Decisions with the Desert Fathers
Father Augustine Wetta reaches back into monastic history to answer one of the most critical questions facing young people today: "How do I make up my mind?" With his characteristic wit and novel approach to classical art, Father Augustine looks to the wisdom of the Desert Fathers to unearth an ancient and highly efficient method for resolving life's most pressing dilemmas—even in the midst of distractions, temptations, and disruptions. Profoundly Biblical and astonishingly practical, these trailblazing saints laid the foundations of Christian discernment by combining their genius for interpreting Scripture with their uncompromising search for the truth. Their patience and remarkable sense of humor gave their words a practicality that speaks as clearly today as it did in the third century. In three steps, each broken down into three parts, the Desert Fathers will teach you how to make decisions in a way that is peaceful, joyful, focused, realistic, and open to the ever-prodding finger of God.
112 pages, Kindle Edition
Published January 25, 2023
32 people are currently reading
126 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 15 of 15 reviews
April 14, 2023
Fr. Wetta is very good at presenting material while you are laughing along the way. You then realize the solid wisdom that was snuck past your guard.
January 16, 2024
I've read this, I am now in the middle of applying the principles now.
May 6, 2025
Short and to the point without a lot of fluff but still provides lots of wisdom.
December 30, 2025
“Life is chaos, the human perspective is profoundly limited, and absolutely everything we do has eternal consequences.”
Pay attention: always have God before your eyes; whatever you do, do it according to the testimony of the Scriptures; in whatever place you live, do not easily leave it.
The Devil only attacks his enemies. Be discouraged when he stops.” Fr Poemen
Whatever work you decide to do, first ask yourself what virtue will come of it.” Fr Poemen as you begin a work- any work- ask yourself How will I be a better person when I finish this?
Even the wrong decision can be transformed by God to help save the world.
Unite our failure with Christs suffering, it transforms into a tremendous good.”
Sometimes the road not taken is not taken for good reason.
Stand by the roads, and look, and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way is, and walk in it, and find rest for your souls.” (Jer 6:16)
These saying is the holy fathers are recorded in this book to school those of you who want to pursue the heavenly way of life and are willing to travel the road to the kingdom of Heaven by following in their footsteps.”
A monk is truly a monk when he has hard choices to make.“
First monks and nuns: second half of 3rd century AD.
Anyone who is good at making decisions has made enough bad ones to understand his own frailty, has enough experience to understand the context, and has enough common sense to avoid making someone else’s decision for him.”
There are three ways to embrace a vocation, and they are all essential to discernment, no matter what sort of life you choose. The first comes from God, the second from man, and the third from necessity. God speaks directly to the human heart. The advice and virtues of some mortal stir the heart. The third way is imposed on you , for you have made the wrong decision and are therefore put to the test. You turn toward God by necessity.” Fr Paphnutius
Pray: retreat, repent, rebuild. Withdraw from the world and reflect on your shortcomings, emptying yourself so as to hear God’s take on the situation.
Think: reduce, refer, reflect. Simplify the question as much as possible, collect advice, and consider all the possible influences and outcomes.
Act: resolve, relax, revisit. Take everything you’ve learned and commit to a particular choice while allowing for the possibility that you may have made a mistake. Then you leave it in God’s hands.”
A man must first be still enough to see himself clearly. Only then can he be of service to others.
Before making a decision: quiet your mind. Calm down
If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives to all men generously and without reproach, and it will be given him. James 1:5
God rarely shouts anyone down. You have to be listening.
Some decisions require deep reflection, some you can’t see coming , and others simply cannot be made at all.”
Don’t make a decision while you are high on emotion. Let the emotion pass. If you wait the situation itself may change, or you may be able to witness a show development in a particular situation.”
Ideal state of mind when making a decision is indifference. Wait until the anger, infatuation, or enthusiasm passes before making a decision you might regret.”
Rethink your decision in different terms. Think in light of different set of priorities.”
One bad choice leads to another. If you don’t break the cycle, you wind up constructing a delusory world for yourself that merely encourages more self-destructive behavior.”
Acedia: weakness . Only constant conversion (change of way, repentance ) can keep you from slipping into this uniquely comfortable form of mediocrity.”
Vice is a breeding ground for bad decisions. It clouds the judgement and predisposes the soul to choosing alternatives that are not in its best interest.”
Keep repenting and your virtue begins to grow. This takes time and endurance. Gives clarity of vision that will allow you to see temptation coming and head it off before it strikes.”
If you stop repenting , you will lose both body and soul.” It keeps us humble, and perseverance demonstrates to God and to ourselves that we have not adandones hope.”
Overthinking a decision can be just as bad as having no options at all.”
Rebuild yourself in the image of someone who does make good decisions by making lots of smaller decisions the right way.”
Create a context for a good decision while you are in a good frame of mind. If you make the right decision often enough Virtue becomes a habit. Aristotle 4th century BC
Don’t rely exclusively on reason. If you really want to do something, you can find a way to rationalize it.”
It takes great toil to change a bad habit. But what is the alternative?
Every real decision is a sum of your past decisions together with costly resolutions.
Do not be hasty in time of calamity.” Sir 2:12
Benjamin Franklin: moral algebra
When you reduce a question to its most basic elements, the answer becomes obvious.
Don’t try to predict the outcome.
Philip Tetlock
Focus on the positive. One element essential in all decision making: trust in God. Whatever you do, do it in the name of God.
God will not be outdone in generosity. St Ignatius
If the Devil can’t get you to do the wrong thing, he get you to worry about not doing the wrong thing, because either way, you’re focused on the wrong thing.”
The decision you are facing is not unique. Figure out who else (Saint) has faced similar problem and find out what they did. You should be willing to be reformed by that person and not just find someone who makes you feel good about yourself.
Don’t ask: what would you do?
Ask: How would you decide this?
God wants you to have everything that is good for you. Don’t get trapped in an either/or mindset.”
Seek out contrary opinions. We all have a tendency to think we know more than we do. Find someone who thinks you are making the wrong decision and really listen to him.”
There is value in stopping to consider how you feel about a decision but emotions are rarely dependable guides.”
Consider whether your heart needs more training before you can trust it in this matter.”
It is the will, informed— but not coerced— by intellect and emotion that should dictate the course of one’s life and the goal of life is heaven.
When your situation changes, you may need to change your method of decision-making•
Don’t just settle for the obvious answer.
Imagine what advice you would give to someone else. Reframe the question as though speaking to another. Ask the question out loud.”
The happiest, holiest people are the ones who make the best of the decisions they’ve already made.”
If you want to keep you thoughts trained on the Almighty, it is best not to keep moving around, because novelty is the enemy of concentration. It is also the enemy of good decision-making.“
For the Desert Fathers the road you’re on isn’t nearly as important as how you walk it. Destination and destiny are not the same thing.
The hardest thing about decision-making is knowing when to stop collecting data and admit that the future is a mystery, your feelings are a mystery, and God’s will for you is a mystery.
There is not a moment in which God does not present Himself under the cover of some pain to be endured, of some consolation to be enjoyed, or of some duty to be performed. All that takes place within us, around us, or through us, contains and conceals His divine action.” Fr Jean Pierre de Caussade
I just pray for a pure heart. There is good sorrow and there is bad sorrow. Bad sorrow comes from the Devil and is weak and irrational; good sorrow comes from God and brings strength by the singing of psalms.
You know you have made a bad decision when: it produces bad results and when the decision makes you feel bad. On a level that is deeper than mere feelings, you will sense that you are in the wrong place.”
A premortem: imagine you have made a decision and failed. Then work backward from that assumption to determine what led to the failure.
We will die and sooner than we think. St Francis de Sales
Every morning I wake up and remind myself that I could be dead.
Sooner or later everyone we know will be dead the only decision of any real consequence is : where do you want to be after that?
If we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord; so then, whether we live or whether we die we are the Lord’s. (Rom 14:8)
Whichever path I choose, pain is an inevitable consequence. Because I am human. I can’t spend my life running away from suffering.”
Pay attention: always have God before your eyes; whatever you do, do it according to the testimony of the Scriptures; in whatever place you live, do not easily leave it.
The Devil only attacks his enemies. Be discouraged when he stops.” Fr Poemen
Whatever work you decide to do, first ask yourself what virtue will come of it.” Fr Poemen as you begin a work- any work- ask yourself How will I be a better person when I finish this?
Even the wrong decision can be transformed by God to help save the world.
Unite our failure with Christs suffering, it transforms into a tremendous good.”
Sometimes the road not taken is not taken for good reason.
Stand by the roads, and look, and ask for the ancient paths, where the good way is, and walk in it, and find rest for your souls.” (Jer 6:16)
These saying is the holy fathers are recorded in this book to school those of you who want to pursue the heavenly way of life and are willing to travel the road to the kingdom of Heaven by following in their footsteps.”
A monk is truly a monk when he has hard choices to make.“
First monks and nuns: second half of 3rd century AD.
Anyone who is good at making decisions has made enough bad ones to understand his own frailty, has enough experience to understand the context, and has enough common sense to avoid making someone else’s decision for him.”
There are three ways to embrace a vocation, and they are all essential to discernment, no matter what sort of life you choose. The first comes from God, the second from man, and the third from necessity. God speaks directly to the human heart. The advice and virtues of some mortal stir the heart. The third way is imposed on you , for you have made the wrong decision and are therefore put to the test. You turn toward God by necessity.” Fr Paphnutius
Pray: retreat, repent, rebuild. Withdraw from the world and reflect on your shortcomings, emptying yourself so as to hear God’s take on the situation.
Think: reduce, refer, reflect. Simplify the question as much as possible, collect advice, and consider all the possible influences and outcomes.
Act: resolve, relax, revisit. Take everything you’ve learned and commit to a particular choice while allowing for the possibility that you may have made a mistake. Then you leave it in God’s hands.”
A man must first be still enough to see himself clearly. Only then can he be of service to others.
Before making a decision: quiet your mind. Calm down
If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives to all men generously and without reproach, and it will be given him. James 1:5
God rarely shouts anyone down. You have to be listening.
Some decisions require deep reflection, some you can’t see coming , and others simply cannot be made at all.”
Don’t make a decision while you are high on emotion. Let the emotion pass. If you wait the situation itself may change, or you may be able to witness a show development in a particular situation.”
Ideal state of mind when making a decision is indifference. Wait until the anger, infatuation, or enthusiasm passes before making a decision you might regret.”
Rethink your decision in different terms. Think in light of different set of priorities.”
One bad choice leads to another. If you don’t break the cycle, you wind up constructing a delusory world for yourself that merely encourages more self-destructive behavior.”
Acedia: weakness . Only constant conversion (change of way, repentance ) can keep you from slipping into this uniquely comfortable form of mediocrity.”
Vice is a breeding ground for bad decisions. It clouds the judgement and predisposes the soul to choosing alternatives that are not in its best interest.”
Keep repenting and your virtue begins to grow. This takes time and endurance. Gives clarity of vision that will allow you to see temptation coming and head it off before it strikes.”
If you stop repenting , you will lose both body and soul.” It keeps us humble, and perseverance demonstrates to God and to ourselves that we have not adandones hope.”
Overthinking a decision can be just as bad as having no options at all.”
Rebuild yourself in the image of someone who does make good decisions by making lots of smaller decisions the right way.”
Create a context for a good decision while you are in a good frame of mind. If you make the right decision often enough Virtue becomes a habit. Aristotle 4th century BC
Don’t rely exclusively on reason. If you really want to do something, you can find a way to rationalize it.”
It takes great toil to change a bad habit. But what is the alternative?
Every real decision is a sum of your past decisions together with costly resolutions.
Do not be hasty in time of calamity.” Sir 2:12
Benjamin Franklin: moral algebra
When you reduce a question to its most basic elements, the answer becomes obvious.
Don’t try to predict the outcome.
Philip Tetlock
Focus on the positive. One element essential in all decision making: trust in God. Whatever you do, do it in the name of God.
God will not be outdone in generosity. St Ignatius
If the Devil can’t get you to do the wrong thing, he get you to worry about not doing the wrong thing, because either way, you’re focused on the wrong thing.”
The decision you are facing is not unique. Figure out who else (Saint) has faced similar problem and find out what they did. You should be willing to be reformed by that person and not just find someone who makes you feel good about yourself.
Don’t ask: what would you do?
Ask: How would you decide this?
God wants you to have everything that is good for you. Don’t get trapped in an either/or mindset.”
Seek out contrary opinions. We all have a tendency to think we know more than we do. Find someone who thinks you are making the wrong decision and really listen to him.”
There is value in stopping to consider how you feel about a decision but emotions are rarely dependable guides.”
Consider whether your heart needs more training before you can trust it in this matter.”
It is the will, informed— but not coerced— by intellect and emotion that should dictate the course of one’s life and the goal of life is heaven.
When your situation changes, you may need to change your method of decision-making•
Don’t just settle for the obvious answer.
Imagine what advice you would give to someone else. Reframe the question as though speaking to another. Ask the question out loud.”
The happiest, holiest people are the ones who make the best of the decisions they’ve already made.”
If you want to keep you thoughts trained on the Almighty, it is best not to keep moving around, because novelty is the enemy of concentration. It is also the enemy of good decision-making.“
For the Desert Fathers the road you’re on isn’t nearly as important as how you walk it. Destination and destiny are not the same thing.
The hardest thing about decision-making is knowing when to stop collecting data and admit that the future is a mystery, your feelings are a mystery, and God’s will for you is a mystery.
There is not a moment in which God does not present Himself under the cover of some pain to be endured, of some consolation to be enjoyed, or of some duty to be performed. All that takes place within us, around us, or through us, contains and conceals His divine action.” Fr Jean Pierre de Caussade
I just pray for a pure heart. There is good sorrow and there is bad sorrow. Bad sorrow comes from the Devil and is weak and irrational; good sorrow comes from God and brings strength by the singing of psalms.
You know you have made a bad decision when: it produces bad results and when the decision makes you feel bad. On a level that is deeper than mere feelings, you will sense that you are in the wrong place.”
A premortem: imagine you have made a decision and failed. Then work backward from that assumption to determine what led to the failure.
We will die and sooner than we think. St Francis de Sales
Every morning I wake up and remind myself that I could be dead.
Sooner or later everyone we know will be dead the only decision of any real consequence is : where do you want to be after that?
If we live, we live to the Lord, and if we die, we die to the Lord; so then, whether we live or whether we die we are the Lord’s. (Rom 14:8)
Whichever path I choose, pain is an inevitable consequence. Because I am human. I can’t spend my life running away from suffering.”
April 21, 2025
I'm a huge fan of Fr. Wetta, so you can imagine how excited I was when I discovered he had a new book out! Great read, full of excellent advice and anecdotes from the Desert Fathers and Benedictine monks.
If you liked Fr. Wetta's book Humility Rules: Saint Benedict's Twelve-Step Guide to Genuine Self-Esteem, then I definitely recommend this one. Very similar in terms of format. And likewise, if you liked this book, check out Humility Rules. Both are great. Since my issue is more with pride than with indecision, the other book worked better for me, but I can see myself rereading both books again and again and again.
If you liked Fr. Wetta's book Humility Rules: Saint Benedict's Twelve-Step Guide to Genuine Self-Esteem, then I definitely recommend this one. Very similar in terms of format. And likewise, if you liked this book, check out Humility Rules. Both are great. Since my issue is more with pride than with indecision, the other book worked better for me, but I can see myself rereading both books again and again and again.
July 2, 2023
I wish this book were longer. It somewhat follows Humility Rules: Saint Benedict's Twelve-Step Guide to Genuine Self-Esteem--which I liked a good deal--in format (quote from source heads each section followed by discussion) but I wish there were more of those quotes here and discussion of the ideas. I think the book just is half of what I wanted (yes desert fathers, no decision making). YMMV.
March 26, 2023
A fun little book with some great little teachings. This is a book to give you the basics on how to make decision and by using time honored advice all wrapped up in a little humor. I love this book just as I loved his first two books.
This book would be great for all high school graduates and even college graduates. Let them learn how to move forward in life with the aid of the Lord.
This book would be great for all high school graduates and even college graduates. Let them learn how to move forward in life with the aid of the Lord.
May 2, 2023
This was a quick, insightful yet easy read. I failed to update promptly upon finishing it, but I cannot recommend enough books by Brother Augustine. I already passed this book along months ago after finishing it. At any age, this is relevant, but I especially bought it in anticipation of our growing young adults.
You won't ever regret picking up books by Brother Augustine !
You won't ever regret picking up books by Brother Augustine !
August 30, 2025
What a sweet, little read on how to approach decision making. The author, a Benedictine monk, uses quotes from the desert fathers that really hit the heart of why decisions can be difficult to make. He also provides a worksheet area to practice the formula he provides. I will definitely come back to this as needed.
September 13, 2023
What a great book. The author gave good practical and spiritual wisdom on making decisions. The author used a lot of humor and the explanations were easy to understand. I will keep this short book close to read again.
March 29, 2024
Pretty Good, It introduced me to the Desert Fathers. Found it pretty interesting.
August 12, 2024
Solid book. Easy read, but good read. Only took 1 day
March 8, 2025
I strongly recommend this book. I love the way the book is organized: the little wisdoms of the Desert Father, some do’s and don’ts and finally a worksheet at the end.
March 11, 2025
My favorite part of this book is the excerpts from Fr Wetta’s journal in the appendix.
August 25, 2023
Always humorous but full of insight, this book is a treat!
Displaying 1 - 15 of 15 reviews