The T Guide: Our Trans Experiences and a Celebration of Gender Expression―Man, Woman, Nonbinary, and Beyond

by Gigi Gorgeous, Kade Gottlieb, Swan Huntley

Real talk about transgender experiences from Gigi Gorgeous and Gottmik

In this fabulous, fashion-forward guide, transgender icons Gigi Gorgeous and Gottmik discuss the ins and outs of being transgender with their honest, hilarious, and GORGEOUS tales of what it means to be true to oneself-and they've picked up a few friends along the way.


Whether you're embarking on your own transgender journey or seeking the knowledge to be the best ally you can be, there is something to be learned from every story they tell.


Join the conversation with Gigi and Gottmik as they get real with discussions on:
-the gender and sexuality spectrums
-the experience of coming out
-navigating gendered public restrooms
-parenting transgender children
-the concepts of physical and internal transitions
-tips and tricks for more masculine or feminine features
-cosmetic and confirmation surgery


The T Guide also includes anecdotes and advice from advocates, allies, and activists across the gender spectrum. Contributors include U.S. Senator Sarah McBride, musician Adam Lambert, and the iconic Paris Hilton.

Genres: Nonfiction, LGBT, Memoir, Queer, Audiobook, Transgender, Self Help

208 pages, Hardcover

Published May 16, 2023

About the author

Gigi Gorgeous is a YouTube star, transgender activist, television personality, actress, model and LGBTQ icon. She has nearly 8 million followers across her social platforms and in January 2017, her feature-length documentary “This is Everything: Gigi Gorgeous”, premiered at the Sundance Film Festival. In 2017, Gigi was named one of Time Magazine’s “25 Most Influential People on the Internet” and one of “Forbes 30 Under 30.” She was also previously awarded YouTuber of the Year at the Shorty Awards and the LogoTV Trailblazing Social Creator Award for her advocacy on behalf of LGBTQ youth, among other awards.

Reviews

[Sarah Jamieson · Rating 5 out of 5]

What I adore is that this book is a full conversation between Gigi and Mik on their experiences transitioning, with the added benefit of pop up pieces from featured trans icons and legends. It's a really easy read but has the potential to change minds and hearts.

[Mileena · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book (forgive the pun) is gorgeous. There’s a lot of “social science” books that I read and think they just need to be normalized. Required reading not just for schools but in general. It was such a lighthearted but informative look on being trans and the struggles but also the beauty that comes with it. Most of this book just reads as a transcript of a conversation between the two main authors so it is educating you but in a way that feels like you’re just talking to two friends. If you fall under the trans umbrella or not this does a lot to show the complexity of not identifying with your assigned gender. It touches on the found family part of life that is so important in queer spaces. I also love Gottmik saying that he wouldn’t choose to be a cis male because then he wouldn’t be in this community that shaped who he is and the people he’s close with. The photographs in this are stunning too and this book toes a nice line between coffee table book and queer studies nonfiction. Also bringing so many voices to do little excerpts here and there really added to this feeling like a community effort. Truly wholesome shit.

[booksxi · Rating 5 out of 5]

that was the most perfect thing i have ever read omg. the format of the book is literally a conversation between gigi and mik it felt like i was reading a podcast. love love LOVE this and i feel like even if you’re not trans this is incredibly informative on how to be a good ally and you get to learn all about the transgender experience in general!!

[Alexander Moriarty · Rating 3 out of 5]

A quick read that is truly a conversation between two trans friends. I especially enjoyed the sidebars from other trans folks. This book is hugely celebrity and drag focused, and if you know that going in it's much better. I'm not a huge fan of celebrity culture, diet culture, or drag--I enjoy drag but am not a drag fan, all of which are things this book kind of takes as part of the trans experience without question. I think it's definitely part of a certain kind of trans culture and the authors' trans culture, which is great for them, but as a nb trans guy in a rural area with a retail job it really didn't reflect the spaces l I'm in or the kind of money and travel I have access to. That's ok. This book isn't for everyone but I got a few great new Instagram folks to follow who are more my speed and that's just fine!

[Scott Guy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Awesome introduction to transness for those who are questioning or not sure what their next step is. I wish I’d read this when I was 14!!!! I wish there had been more on trans history and a broader perspective of trans people (eg not all thin rich white people) but alas!! This is a great start for the trans community :)

[Ema · Rating 4 out of 5]

A great insight into the life of two trans icons! I walked away learning so much and how to better support as an ally. My only *complaint* is I wish the “featured” stories were more involved and not just little blurbs.

[Alyse · Rating 5 out of 5]

So thankful for the knowledge, the inclusivity, the truth, the vulnerability, and the hope this book gave me.

[Kathleen · Rating 5 out of 5]

I listened to the audiobook version and it felt like I was listening to a podcast with Gigi and Gottmik.
This was very informative and helpful for just about anyone- whether you know someone who has transitioned, is transitioning, want to know more about the process and personal experiences or just want to learn how to be a better ally this is a fantastic resource in such a cute format. They also discuss helpful resources in the community, recommend doctors for surgeries, as well as organizations to get involved in. Loved it.

[Jan Petersen · Rating 3 out of 5]

Ein Buch, welches den Weg des Transgender Seins beschreibt und persönlichen Erfahrungen von zwei aus der Öffentlichkeit kommenden Personen, Kade( Drage Queen: Gottmik) und Gigi (YouTuberin) erläutert.
Das Buch ist in die wichtigsten Bereiche einer Transition unterteilt und meistens in einem Dialog zwischen Kade und Gigi geschrieben.

Was mir gut gefallen hat, dass auch für mich als queere Person, die sich bereits mit dem Thema befasst hast, viele Details und Informationen neu waren. Das Buch ist gut geeignet für Menschen, die sich in die Gedankenwelt von Trans Menschen begeben wollen, um so zu erfahren wie sich Trans Menschen fühlen und was sie durchleben müssen.
Nebenbei ist es sehr bereichernd gewesen sich über die Gesellschaftlichen Normen und Regeln, die sich die Menschheit selbst auferlegt hat, kritisch zu hinterfragen und den Spirit der Offenheit und Toleranz in Bezug auf Gender, Sexualität und Selbstfindung zu erhalten.
Mir hat zudem gefallen, dass viele Texte von anderen Trans Menschen eingebracht wurden die meist sehr prägnant und mit großer Wucht die Dinge auf den Punkt gebracht haben.

Was mir leider nicht zu gut gefallen hat, war das Themen meist nur kurz erwähnt wurden und manchmal nicht weiter vertieft wurden. An gewissen Stellen war es sehr persönlich und gut erläutert und bei anderen stellen leider zu wenig. Mir hätte es zudem gefallen wenn in den allgemeine Texten, wo das Thema kurz erläutert wird einfach mehr dazu geschrieben wäre. Eine kritische Betrachtungsweise oder mehr Beispiele hätten das Buch interessanter gemacht. Außerdem waren mir eindeutig zu viele Bilder enthalten.

Ich fand das Buch super aufklärend und bereichernd, dennoch hat mir die Tiefe mancher Themenbereiche gefehlt.
Für jeden geeignet, der sich für die Thematik interessiert und um so vielleicht auch offner mit queeren Menschen, besonders Trans Menschen umgehen zu können. Es spiegelt die Realität vieler Menschen wieder, für die diese Themen allgegenwärtig sind. Wenn wir andere Menschen verstehen wollen, so werden wir selbst offener und toleranter, und dabei ist das Buch ein guter Einstieg. :)

[Maddie Cuckow · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book and how much it taught me about the Trans experience through the eyes of Trans people. I was worried this book would really only get at two stories of the Trans experience, but I love how GiGi and Gottmik pulled stories from queer, non-binary, and Trans folks of all ages to give their stories and truths. It was a really engaging read!

[Sari Sheridan · Rating 5 out of 5]

I devoured this book in one day. I love Gottmik & GiGis raw honesty and especially the chapter dedicated for parents. I feel it’s so important today to reach out to people on this level. In this day things are a total mess and the lgbtqia+ community is under attack. As a parent myself, I wish more would be open to reading books like this. Read about things they may not understand and learn! The first hand experiences from two of the most beautiful human beings there were unfiltered and honest.. It’s brave to come and show the realness behind transitioning and doing it on such a public platform. They talk with their parents, friends, & others in the influential industry about their experiences as well. I ordered this book as soon as I could preorder it as I’m already a huge fan of Gottmik & GiGi from RuPaul.

Keep shining y’all! I am here for it & rooting for you. So many of us are, even if some days it may seem harder than it should be just to be you unabashedly. Know you have thousands of fans who support your decisions & admire your confidence to shine despite those trying to dim your light 💜 #ifyoucantloveyourselfhowthehellcanyoulovesomebodyelse #canigetanamen !!

[Christine · Rating 4 out of 5]

I got this book because I was a fan of both of these lovely human beings. I really enjoyed the information presented by these two. I feel like this would be an excellent book to share with someone who is struggling with their first introduction to the trans world. Whether they need to be a better ally or need help with the courage to admit things to themselves.

[Jessie Nichols · Rating 4 out of 5]

I listened to the audio of this, which is done by the authors. A great book to listen to as it felt more personable and you could hear the emotion while sharing their stories. It was a beautiful way to have a hard conversation. It's informative for allies, transgender people, and those just seeking to learn more.

[Ellen N. · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you for sharing not only your experiences, but experiences from others. Thank you for sharing how I can be a better ally to the trans community!

[Jennifer Stephan · Rating 4 out of 5]

I chose this for the MA Center for the Books Challenge March charge to read a book about someone with a marginalized identity. It is written by two trans people, Gigi Gorgeous and Gottmik, in a conversation style with further insights by other trans individuals and allies. It is a quick read and addresses common questions about trans experiences in an accessible way. I especially enjoyed the stunning photos of these two beautiful people.

[Hannah Ives · Rating 5 out of 5]

Learned a lot and really enjoyed the format!

[Diana]

Seriously, Gottmik is a serial whiner!

[Kenya Legg (Hampton) · Rating 5 out of 5]

The T Guide reads like a very important conversation between friends. A great breakdown of two trans peoples experiences with transitioning. This book feels like a wonderful gateway into the Trans community and what it can be like for them in a sometimes ignorant society. Bravo Gigi and Gottmik for being real and vulnerable.

[Susan · Rating 5 out of 5]

As advertised exchange between the authors about their trans experiences. A very accessible resource for young people, parents, and allies. Overall uplifting and practical knowledge/advice. It’s a fast read — making it easily approachable for anyone interested. Brava to Gigi and bravo to Gottmik for sharing their conversations in book form as a contribution to the LGBTQIA+ canon.

[theJungleBOOKIE : Jennifer Machado · Rating 4 out of 5]

I picked this book because it was on audio, available, & it fit well into my theme this month but honestly another big reason is because I was pretty clueless in regards to the trans movement & I wanted to educate myself so I wasn’t ignorant anymore.

I obviously know what transgender means & I worked at Disney so please believe me when I say I have my share of gay & lesbian friends… but I dont know a single person in my life that went through the transgender process & it’s something I’ve always been curious about.

Despite having the upmost respect for everyone & despite the fact that I wouldn’t judge what anyone does, I never really quite understood the hurdles & stigmas trans people have to go through until I listened to this book. I didn’t understand just how much of an internal struggle they had to go through to find peace within themselves & hearing some of their stories made me feel sad. But at the same time kind of hopeful. We live in a very different world now & I can only hope it continues to be accepting.

Anyways, I’m really glad I took the time to read this because it was really informative & helped clear a lot of things about the trans process for me. I’m hoping now that I’m more knowledgeable I can provide to be a better ally in the future 🌈

[Rosalie · Rating 2 out of 5]

Some apparently love it, but I don’t like a book that’s mostly a transcript of a conversation. I’d rather listen to the podcast between them.

[Zee · Rating 3 out of 5]

good intro to transgender experiences but good to keep in mind these are more privileged voices and they kind of write that off casually. didn't go very deep

[Bre-Anne · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm such a fan of Gottmik, so I was very excited to read this. Kade and Gigi do an incredible job of covering a variety of topics that are impacted by their trans identities, including (but not limited to) dating, bottom surgery, public restrooms, coming out, and much more. There are also very short snippets on various topics in the book from friends of the authors, such as their parents, politicians, activists... Paris Hilton! And don't worry - we have Ru girls like Courtney Act, MOTHER Sasha Colby, and of couuuuurse, Violet Chachki.

This book is a short read (my kobo says I did it in less than 4 hours) and uses incredibly accessible language. Expect to see sentences like "yeah, like, for sure." or "that's iconic"; very accessible, but not the most traditional language used in an educational guide. That said, it feels authentically Gigi and Gottmik and you can easily read it in their voices. The book is also aimed at anyone who wants guidance on the trans experience, so it's perfect for baby trans people as well as cisgender people who want to learn more and be a supportive ally.

My only qualm with the book is that it seems like a book format isn't the ideal form for this media. Because of the conversational aspect and how short the blurbs are from the featured friends, it reads like it would have been better suited for a movie/docu-series, intermixed with clips from their friends reading their pieces. I'm glad it exists in book form for people to reference to, but it feels like it was a transcript of what should be a movie, you know?

All in all, strongly recommend this book. It's important to hear about the trans experience from trans voices, and this is a great first step.

[Aurora · Rating 5 out of 5]

“What a wonderful experience it is to hold all this conflicting, beautiful nuance along the journey of finding myself and my happiness.”

“No lawmaker can take this identity from me. No governor can erase my knowledge of myself. I will always know my own truth. And that is perhaps one of the most powerful proofs of resilience our community will never lose.”

“Instead of teaching people how to treat us, we sometimes let other people teach us how we’re going to be treated.”

“If you spend your time putting pressure on finding a relationship or getting married, it will consume you, and you’ll just be upset waiting for it to happen. It’s detrimental to lose sleep over something you have no control over. I think trusting fate is probably a better way to go. Relationship or not, you want to be thriving. Focus on the things you love. And then if the right person comes along, great. They’re adding to the equation but you don’t need them to survive.”

Advocating for yourself: “first, you have to identify what’s wrong, and then you have to identify what you want. The more worthy you feel, the more you will ask for, because you’ll know that you deserve it. In order to advocate for ourselves, we have to know our worth. For me, my feelings of worthiness have grown over time.”

[Ed C · Rating 5 out of 5]

Gigi and Gottmik do an excellent job of creating an informative guide from their perspective of the trans experience. They are very informative, welcoming and real about the process, issues and layers that come with transitioning. The book is very easily accessible, written as a chat transcript between the two and is funny but honest in all the right ways. I learned a lot and am very glad I took the time to read it. Aside from the two author’s, we also get snippets of insight from celebrities, drag queens and friends+family of Gigi and Gottmik that add a lot of heart to this collection. The portrait photographs are really great also and add dimension when reading about the physical, emotional, medical and societal issues the trans community faces.

[Jennifer · Rating 4 out of 5]

I fell in love with Gotmik during season 13 of RPDR. I was so intrigued by his story and his relationship with Gender. I had never heard of a trans man who was also a drag queen.

Listening to this audiobook was a great reminder that gender is spectrum and no one needs to be forced into a box when it comes to their self expression.

Some of the stories were hard to listen to, but never got super graphic. I’m curious what the physical copy looks like bc listening to the audio felt like listening to a limited podcast series. Also the constant reminder of “this is our experience and may not work for you” felt unnecessary, but again I haven’t been in the same position as some of the targeted audience.

High level information that any curious mind can benefit from.

[alex · Rating 2 out of 5]

Listened to audiobook. Probably 2.5 stars. I expected way more and to come out of this book with a new perspective but I just didn’t and I didn’t feel like I learned anything. Maybe it’s because I watch a lot of drag race and have followed trans people on social media for a long time. A lot of it seemed self explanatory but it would be a great book for a parent or a kid figuring things out who didn’t know anything. It was short and sweet only 4 hours so I finished in 2 days.

I think the writing was kind of lack luster and all over the place too. For example, terms like binder were used without an explanation for its use or how it can be dangerous if worn too long. I hope they never see this review tho love you gottmik and gigi you did great :*

[Brenda Marie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book! I can't recommend this enough for anyone and everyone. Gigi and Gottmik have put together an amazing guide for transgender persons, for their family members, for allies, for parents. They cover every question that you've ever thought about asking (and maybe some that you hadn't considered!), from coming out to bottom surgery, in a candid, conversational setting. I absolutely adore that they came at this from the perspective of writing the book that they wish they would have had when they first started to wonder whether they were transgender. The book itself is beautiful as well, and makes a lovely addition and conversation starter for my coffee table! Every young transgender person needs to own this book. 5 stars.

[Bobbi · Rating 5 out of 5]

The world is better with this book in it. It’s written in a light-hearted, fun, quick read sort of way, but it’s more than light-hearted and fun. It’s truly eye-opening. I am a cisgender woman with minimal insight into the experiences of trans people. I read this from a position of not knowing and I’m so grateful I did. There was rawness and vulnerability where Kade and Gigi discussed topics that were heavy and complicated. They did this for all of the people out there who needed this, who wanted this - to become more competent and to become better versions of themselves.

[Levi Coffin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Gigi & Gotmik offer a refreshing and humorous take on their journey with gender and identity. Through witty anecdotes, they explore topics ranging from the gender and sexuality spectrums to navigating gendered public restrooms. As drag queens and also trans folks, they provide invaluable insights into the joys and struggles of leaning into authenticity. The book also delves into the concepts of physical and internal transitions, offering practical advice and reassurance to those on similar paths. With warmth and candor, they shed light on the complexities of gender, offering a much-needed perspective that is both personal and insightful.