Edinburgh has always seemed like a magical place; with its rolling hills and towering abodes, everything seems possible. Perhaps, its just magical enough that Saatchi, illustrious marathon runner and notorious college student, can finally leave her past grievances beneath her thrumming feet. Even newcomer Emmylou, running away from an oppressive past, may be able to find exactly what she's been missing out on in from under her mother's heel. But, is it magic enough for the both of them? Or are they destined to trip before the finish line?
Saatchi Saatchi just wants to run. It's all she's ever known and it's all she's ever loved. The cobblestones of Edinburgh thrumming below her feet are her only peace of mind as she grieves her past self. But she's lost all of the freedom with the mounting pressure to make her once adored hobby a career.
Emmylou Emmylou is on the run. She's finally put herself first and decided to take a leap of faith that's led her to a country she's never even visited, all to escape a controlling mother. The problem is, she thought it'd be easy once she made that leap but, instead, it's only made her realize she's just as lost as before.
Content Warnings: drug use, alcohol, self harm, suicidal idealation, bullying, toxic parent, sexual assault/rape (mentioned)
American Emmylou moves to Edinburgh for university, finally getting out of Texas and experiencing life unhampered by her controlling mother. There, she meets Saatchi, a runner who is struggling with both her past and future.
The way I was inches from DNFing this from around 40% in and it never got better… unfortunately there's no way to sugarcoat how much I disliked the experience of reading this book as a Scot. It's so clearly written by someone who has never gone to university in Scotland, which is an issue because the book is about university students in Edinburgh, and not even the barest research has gone into that. Uni in Scotland is so different from uni in the US, so I was CONSTANTLY rolling my eyes and making notes of 'nope, that's not how that works here'. Characters talk about their majors (not language we use here), say they're majoring in pre-med or pre-law (courses that do not exist in Scotland - you just do a medicine or law degree), mention scholarships and tuition even though they're Scottish students attending a Scottish uni (therefore, there is no tuition fee for an undergrad). It completely took me out of the story and irritated me to no end.
This book very much read like 'I want to prove how much I know about Scotland as fast as possible' and doing a bad job. To someone who has lived in Scotland their whole life, this is a painful read. These characters are teenagers and they unironically call each other 'lass' every other sentence - I have never been called 'lass' by anyone under the age of 50. It was just such a cringe fest. I also just generally didn't vibe with the writing style, and a closer edit was needed - some words were used incorrectly, sometimes words were missing, mistakes were a little too frequent to go ignored.
I really wanted to like this, and I did mostly like Saatchi as a character. The relationships between her, Sai, and Finn were the highlight of me, and I thought Saatchi's history of mental illness, trauma, and addition were mostly handled alright. I did find Emmylou a little irritating though, and never really felt the chemistry between her and Saatchi as a couple. Characters generally felt a little bit caricature-esque (or a LOT, in the case of Emmylou's mother) which is not ideal in a book which is so character-heavy.
I think an American would probably enjoy this! I, however, will never read another book about Scotland by a non-Scot again if I can possibly help it!
Thanks to the publisher for sending me a copy in exchange for an honest review.
I really tried to give this my best shot. However, nearly half way through, I was adamant about DNFing this. It just seemed so slow, no peak of interest, and the characters truly lacked depth. It couldn't hold my interest, it was tough to push through to finish it so I could leave a review. Wish I didn't continue. Not my cup of tea, but maybe it's better for someone else?
I won this book from a Goodreads giveaway. All of the statements above are my true opinions after fully reading this book.
I won a copy of this book from a giveaway the author made
I mostly enjoyed this book , I think that all the important stuff is handled well and the list of trigger warnings is exhaustive. I liked how Emmylou became confident in her sexuality and I generally liked the embracing of the word "lesbian". But I find the part after they get together a bit rushed.
Moreover I think this books needs a little bit more of editing because I found some passages confusing, especially when I was supposed to understand there was a change in time(I suggest to use more spaces to graphycally give the idea). And I really think this book would benefit from a better layout because I think it would be more enjoyable graphically seeing the changing of POV in a chapter ( like with more spaces, writing the characters name bigger and in bold). But all of this doesn't affect the story that i still liked, it's just a suggestion.
I decided to not judge the Scottish setting because I know nothing about Scotland but I can say, since I'm European, that I haven't felt the European vibes and I'd have liked to feel the Scottish setting more
A beautiful debut novel that captures the audience from the first chapter. This story authentically conveys the feelings, comedy, and pain that can accompany being queer, coming into identity, and coming out. The author does a wonderful job holding the complexity of cross continental context, and they start by giving context warnings for heavy information. The book provides the reader with both realistic and tactful moves through nuance of the story by alternating between character perspectives, which makes the story feel so realistic and engaging. Each character is further developed throughout the text, unlike many novels, so their journey does not stop early on in the story... this book only leaves the readers wanting more. I would love to see another book from other characters perspectives! It is so refreshing to see LGBT+ storylines told from a place of authenticity and realism. Many of the experiences in this story feel universal, or at least very common, and I haven’t felt so seen from a book in a while.
This is the debut novel from this author. And if this is just the beginning for them, then I am very excited to see where they go and how they grow as a writer. My favorite part of this book is the emotions. They are so authentic and raw and it was enough to make me want to cry. There were a lot of complicated feelings coming from the characters and it was all written so well. The characters were another amazing part of this book! Our two main characters are amazing and they have such an earnest connection between them and their friends. They’re both running from demons in their past/present, one in a literal way, but together (and with the help of their other friends) they grow.
So, I won a Kindle copy of this book in a Goodreads giveaway and was pretty excited. Unfortunately, this book just didn't work for me. There's too much going on, right from the beginning, and it didn't feel like enough time was spent fleshing out parts and characters in a satisfying way. Because of this, I felt like the relationship between Saatchi and Emmy didn't develop in a way that felt natural, instead going from curiosity to friendship to "I love this person". It, ultimately, left me feeling wanting and kind of overwhelmed with the amount of plot threads and characters being introduced.
I'm not going to leave a rating right now. Mostly because I don't really know what to rate it and, even if this book didn't end up being for me, it may work for you.
This novel is brilliant!!! I expected to enjoy it, but I didn’t expect to love it quite as much as I did! The characters all felt so real and they were each fascinating and the representation in the novel was beautifully done!!
Also, it gets bonus points for being the first book I’ve read that seems to have allosexual Aromantic representation. It isn’t outright stated, but based on how the character discusses his sexual encounters I’m like 95% certain! So that is cool!!
I might write a longer (better) review later, but for now, this was wonderful and I loved reading it so much!!
I can't finish this book, because I'm just not in a place in my life to read such a downer. This is a well observed book about self harm and self denial. The bits of blooming romance (with one girl deep in the closet struggling with the pressures of an overbearing mother, and one girl overwhelmed by the pressure of her talent as a runner) in the first fifty percent were sweet and felt real, but for me, the angst was too much. For other people, it might be perfect!
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
This was a lovely, heartfelt exploration of growing up and growing through pain and trauma. Emmylou is a sweet, if naive, newcomer to Edinburgh. It was a delight to watch her find herself in her new home, get to know her new roommates, and fall in love. I think my favorite of the roommates (other than their cat, Anne Bonny, named after the famous female pirate) was the quirky artist Kirsty (NOT Kristy). I loved getting to see Saatchi and Emmylou get to know each other. Definitely a good first book for Ellis Mae! Can’t wait to see what they write next.
I don't typically read YA/NA books very much, but this one was intriguing, and I decided to give it a go. I quite enjoyed it. It was more profound than I had anticipated. The characters were all very lovable and their development was done well. I didn't love the third-act break, but it was necessary and I understood it.
Content/Trigger Warnings: Graphic: Alcoholism, Drug abuse, Emotional abuse, Homophobia, Physical abuse, Transphobia, Violence Moderate: Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault
Hello! I am the author of this novel. In the original, I had a sensitivity reader (born, raised, currently residing in Edinburgh) for culture in Edinburgh. Unfortunately, I didn't do a sufficient job in properly portraying Scottish culture and I would like everyone to know, it is currently being re-edited. Thank you for your patience and understanding.
What a great debut novel, Ellis Mae! I love a good group of friends that help each other and running away from everything you know to find yourself. Well done! I can’t wait for more.
This was a great debut novel that I thoroughly enjoyed. While I did enjoy it I don’t see myself ever rereading it so I’m giving it a 4 star. I do look forward to more books but Ellis Mae in the future!
The introduction of characters was a bit confusing at the beginning and I still had difficulty keeping track of who was who until the last quarter of the book. Still, it was a sweet book about finding yourself.
Was originally going to rate this four stars before halfway through the book one of the main characters outed the other one to their entire friend group and it was never mentioned again
The dialogue and split pov first person narration just didn’t feel believable. This book is lots of trauma and drama and teenagers being dumb. It did get me excited for my next long run though.
first of all, I'd really like to thank the author for sending me a copy of their book and to apologize for taking so long 🩷
i wanted to LOVE this book so bad, i probably raised my expectations to an impossible extent. it wasn't what i expected it to be and it might be just my fault.
the plot was very simple yet entertaining, but there was something really off about how it was developed, i can't exactly pinpoint what tho.
i liked the characters, every one of them had something that made them stand out to me. for the better and worse.
i really liked how the tropes were developed and how the relationships between the characters continued to grow during the story. i would have liked it more if some aspects of the characters were talked about more and sooner.
unfortunately it took me so long to read this book (and even longer to post the review) and maybe this was one of the reasons it didn't stand out to me like i was hoping it would have.
this is the story of two girls slowly falling for each other, but it's also a story of two friends discovering love and the story of self-discovery and self-acceptance.
it's a story of first and second chances, of fear and hope, of shame and pride and this meant a lot to me and i really want to thank the author for giving me the opportunity to read this 🩷
i really liked the ending and can't wait to read more by this author 🩷