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Runaways
Jimmy Biffman's life has just cratered. His wife dumps him for Dr. Dwayne the periodontist, he's downsized out of a job, and he's living in a trailer in his best friend Erica's backyard. So, when Erica hatches a wild scheme to recapture Jimmy's lost youth, he's powerless to resist. RUNAWAYS is the journey of two 40-somethings looking for a life they're convinced has passed them by. With a naïve belief in what's possible--and a foolish misunderstanding of the risks--they end up completely out of their element and in way over their heads. The unsavory predators who suck them into their world know exactly what they're doing--unlike Erica and Jimmy, who, like two giddy high-schoolers cutting class, have no idea what they're in for. Their new lives won't turn out remotely as they've planned...
243 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2006
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Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews
February 3, 2020
I was unprepared for three elements of this book:
1. It was told from the point of view of multiple narrators.
2. The characters being "in over their heads" referred to murder and drugs.
3. The language choices in Scooter and Erica's sections left me wondering if the author was trying to make a point about how those narrators thought and felt or if language had evolved that much in the time since the book was written.
All in all this book didn't gel for me. I wasn't pulling for any particular characters and despite reading the book quickly, I didn't feel real urgency to find out what happened next.
1. It was told from the point of view of multiple narrators.
2. The characters being "in over their heads" referred to murder and drugs.
3. The language choices in Scooter and Erica's sections left me wondering if the author was trying to make a point about how those narrators thought and felt or if language had evolved that much in the time since the book was written.
All in all this book didn't gel for me. I wasn't pulling for any particular characters and despite reading the book quickly, I didn't feel real urgency to find out what happened next.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
December 30, 2010
Okay. I have no idea on earth why I read this. It was great: I was loving it up until the point where his car broke down. I started getting a little bored. It had been hilarious – I honestly had loved Scooter’s point of view. He was funny, he was dorky, and nerdy, but he was sane, and had a unique point of view.
But then he got hit by lightning after running into a cluster of trees. First off, who the hell runs into the forest WHEN IT IS SHOOTING BOLTS OF LIGHTNING OUT!? That’s practically the worst thing you can do, save strapping yourself to a freaking lightning rod. So it’s no wonder he was hit.
But second of all, where on earth did that even come from!? I mean, he’s recounting his tale, and first his car breaks down, then he goes and decides to hike the rest of the fifteen or so miles up there, and then he gets hit by lightning (what the hell!?), and then he eventually finds the ghost town, and inevitably Adonna, and at that point she was acting to be someone she so wasn’t, not at all, and then he sees her face and freaks. And passes out. (Okay….. ???)
And when he wakes up, she’s still playing up the good little ranger image, and he’s naked, which personally I would find a little odd, but whatever. I mean, I know she’s an EMT and all that (or so she said) and he needed medical attention, but still. For the sake of his dignity, she could have left his boxers on him, despite them smelling like charred remains of who knows what. I mean, after she’d checked him out and everything. No pun intended.
And then Adonna’s creepy ass ex-husband shows up, looking to cook up a batch of meth, unbeknownst to little Scooter at the time, and she starts making out with him, and they’re feeling each other up in the middle of the street!!!!! In front of Scooter, who is there for possible romantic interest in her in the first place. (I’ll explain that later.)
But hello? Did anyone read that first sentence in that last paragraph carefully? THAT’S HER EX. EX-HUSBAND.Who divorced her because of what happened to her face. (She and her ex, Randy, were cooking up a lovely batch of meth one day while they were married and it blew up. Her face got burned on one side. It’s sad.) I feel bad for her, but first off, there’s such a thing called skin grafting and plastic surgery and whatnot. If she really, actually did not want to look like that, she could do something about it. And second off, who goes and makes out with their ex-husband, who, need I remind you, dumped her because her face got all messed up. Oh, yes, he’s a lovely little fellow.
So, now that I’ve touched base on that, back to the story. After their little grab-ass and spit-swapping session in the middle of the street, we discover that Randy, Adonna’s awesome little ex-hubby, has a major attitude problem, and makes it a point to tell Scooter to mind his own business. I cleaned up the language a bit though. And then Adonna and Randy disappear for the night to do God only knows what, but I have an idea that may not be too far from the actual mark, and Scooter retires to sleep in her cabin.
When he wakes up, he is still the only one in the cabin, and so he goes off to do a little investigating. Randy shows off some more of his lovely language and tells Scoot to “mind his own effing business, mothereffer”. Again, cleaning up the language a bit. Scooter doesn’t, starts giggling, and next thing you know he’s looking up the barrel of a gun. Somehow, he manages to get it, and ends up shooting Randy to death. Calls it self-defense. I disagree. It was self-defense…. Up until he shot more than the one bullet. He emptied the magazine. To anyone else, that would seem like a crime of passion. Not self-defense, considering that the first bullet would have put him out of commission.
So then they bury him, not very well, apparently, and decide to hike the fifteen miles out of there, all the while Scooter’s foot hurts because he sliced it on a rock on his way to the outhouse the morning he woke up naked to Adonna eating cornflakes.
And then it’s time for Erica’s point of view. She gets fed up of her husband, which personally I don’t blame her for. I love God, and I’m a Christian, but I’m not an extremist and I could not live that way of life. I just wouldn’t be happy. Anyhoo, so she up and leaves without so much as a word to anyone and goes off to find her best friend. This whole thing is her fault anyway.
See, Scooter’s wife – now ex-wife, I suppose – left him for their periodontist because she found him “stimulating and exciting”. And this is a guy who slices gums for a living, a’ight? Which means Scooter must be really boring. So anyway, his seven year old, Crystal, is just like her mother. Bad attitude, and she doesn’t love Scooter. Sad, isn’t it? That’s her daddy, mind you. And she’s seven. Yeah. She's a darling little girl.
Okay, so he starts living out of his best friend Erica’s and her husband, Eric’s trailer. For about a day or two, in which he discovers Eric and Erica aren’t happy and Eric tells him he’s really happy for him because he’s free. And then Erica gets this crazy idea, and says that Scooter needs to write a book. A nonfiction book, about his quest for his woman. But to make it fun and exciting. The problem? When you go looking for trouble, you usually find it. Which, clearly, he did.
So she finds ghost town empty, save for a guy who’s looking for Adonna and Randy. She says she’s looking for Scooter, and they decide to off searching for them together. Eventually, they find them in New Mexico, and Scooter is completely insane. Like, nutty. Not mean insane, just crazy. As in, ooh-look-at-the-pretty-froot-loops-isn’t-this-great-oh-my-goodness-the-sky-is-so-blue! Kind of crazy. Like a little kid on a sugar rush. Except it lasts all the freaking time. And he giggles.
Oh my gosh, there was so much giggling, mostly – if not all – from Scooter, I was beginning to wonder about the sexual tendencies of the male characters. Seriously. Guys don’t giggle. Not even “band-fags”, as the author put it so fantastically. Guys chuckle. They smirk. They’re smartasses. But They. Do. Not. Giggle. If I never hear the phrase “band-fags” or the term “giggle” again, it will be too soon. It was overused. And that’s an understatement.
So anyway, then it switches to Eric’s point of view, and I haven’t really explained what’s so bad about him. And there’s nothing really wrong with him. He’s just….. he’s really into God. And there’s nothing wrong with that. I’m all for it, in fact. But he’s an extremist. Which would be okay, if he didn’t try to cram it down everyone else’s throats.
Every time something goes wrong, he acts like he’s Nicodemus or something, and I don’t even know who that is (which is sad, on my part), and starts touching their head and praying. I can understand why Erica and Scooter get so fed up with him. He doesn’t know the meaning of the words “personal” and “space”, much less when you add them together. You know he made her have seven kids? SEVEN. He wanted more-more-more-more-more.
So anyway, Eric finds Scooter acting like he’s high as a kite with a shit-eating grin on his face, and he desperately wants to find his wife. Eventually, he does, and she’s off with Handsome Jimmy, the guy who she met back in ghost town, and Adonna, eating Mexican food. He calls the cops, who are looking for Scooter and Adonna at this point, and gets a gun shoved in his face. Erica decides she needs to go back home to her family, and the go outside right as the cops arrive. Of course, everyone else has already fled, because Handsome Jimmy pulled a gun on Eric, remember? So of course everyone is going to flee the scene. Which, they did.
So now cops have surrounded the building, and only Handsome Jimmy, Adonna, and loopy Scooter are left inside. Scooter, being the crazy little bird he is at this point, decides to run outside, gun blazing, in a last-ditch effort to save his new buds, so he can die while they try to sneak out the back, despite their protests, saying that the building is surrounded and there’s no way they can sneak out the back and make a quick getaway. But he’s too far gone to listen to even them.
So of course he gets shot down, and Eric and Erica, being cut off from the argument they’re having, watch their best friend (her best friend, really) die a gruesome and bloody death. Wonderful, I know. At which point Eric realizes that Erica always loved Scooter and that he’s the one she should have married, not him. A little late for that, I’d say, considering they’re all forty years old and Scooter’s now dead, but I guess epiphanies come when they do. Eric always was a little slow on the uptake, though, so I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised.
Adonna and Handsome Jimmy decide that there’s no way to get out of this one, and walk out with their hands up. Erica says she’ll come home and pretend for Eric’s sake. She’ll be the good little church going housewife he wants her to be, but she won’t be happy. She’ll pretend to be happy, and go to all the bible-studies and be his little trophy wife, under the knowledge that she may leave again. But, she will no longer believe in God.
So. Then it goes back to Erica’s point of view. A little time has passed. Scooter was buried. Jane didn’t even come; Crystal was bored and eager to get to soccer practice. And she up and leaves. Forever. She becomes a runaway for good. Leaves behind all seven of her children. She doesn’t even pack anything. All she takes are the clothes on her back and her keys and her car. The end.
This book was HORRIBLE. I honestly saw no point to it, and all the characters acted like they were twenty, when in reality, they’re all at least forty years old. Scary, isn’t it? I thought so. I hate this book. It was just…. no. No one should read this. I regret wasting my time on it.
But then he got hit by lightning after running into a cluster of trees. First off, who the hell runs into the forest WHEN IT IS SHOOTING BOLTS OF LIGHTNING OUT!? That’s practically the worst thing you can do, save strapping yourself to a freaking lightning rod. So it’s no wonder he was hit.
But second of all, where on earth did that even come from!? I mean, he’s recounting his tale, and first his car breaks down, then he goes and decides to hike the rest of the fifteen or so miles up there, and then he gets hit by lightning (what the hell!?), and then he eventually finds the ghost town, and inevitably Adonna, and at that point she was acting to be someone she so wasn’t, not at all, and then he sees her face and freaks. And passes out. (Okay….. ???)
And when he wakes up, she’s still playing up the good little ranger image, and he’s naked, which personally I would find a little odd, but whatever. I mean, I know she’s an EMT and all that (or so she said) and he needed medical attention, but still. For the sake of his dignity, she could have left his boxers on him, despite them smelling like charred remains of who knows what. I mean, after she’d checked him out and everything. No pun intended.
And then Adonna’s creepy ass ex-husband shows up, looking to cook up a batch of meth, unbeknownst to little Scooter at the time, and she starts making out with him, and they’re feeling each other up in the middle of the street!!!!! In front of Scooter, who is there for possible romantic interest in her in the first place. (I’ll explain that later.)
But hello? Did anyone read that first sentence in that last paragraph carefully? THAT’S HER EX. EX-HUSBAND.Who divorced her because of what happened to her face. (She and her ex, Randy, were cooking up a lovely batch of meth one day while they were married and it blew up. Her face got burned on one side. It’s sad.) I feel bad for her, but first off, there’s such a thing called skin grafting and plastic surgery and whatnot. If she really, actually did not want to look like that, she could do something about it. And second off, who goes and makes out with their ex-husband, who, need I remind you, dumped her because her face got all messed up. Oh, yes, he’s a lovely little fellow.
So, now that I’ve touched base on that, back to the story. After their little grab-ass and spit-swapping session in the middle of the street, we discover that Randy, Adonna’s awesome little ex-hubby, has a major attitude problem, and makes it a point to tell Scooter to mind his own business. I cleaned up the language a bit though. And then Adonna and Randy disappear for the night to do God only knows what, but I have an idea that may not be too far from the actual mark, and Scooter retires to sleep in her cabin.
When he wakes up, he is still the only one in the cabin, and so he goes off to do a little investigating. Randy shows off some more of his lovely language and tells Scoot to “mind his own effing business, mothereffer”. Again, cleaning up the language a bit. Scooter doesn’t, starts giggling, and next thing you know he’s looking up the barrel of a gun. Somehow, he manages to get it, and ends up shooting Randy to death. Calls it self-defense. I disagree. It was self-defense…. Up until he shot more than the one bullet. He emptied the magazine. To anyone else, that would seem like a crime of passion. Not self-defense, considering that the first bullet would have put him out of commission.
So then they bury him, not very well, apparently, and decide to hike the fifteen miles out of there, all the while Scooter’s foot hurts because he sliced it on a rock on his way to the outhouse the morning he woke up naked to Adonna eating cornflakes.
And then it’s time for Erica’s point of view. She gets fed up of her husband, which personally I don’t blame her for. I love God, and I’m a Christian, but I’m not an extremist and I could not live that way of life. I just wouldn’t be happy. Anyhoo, so she up and leaves without so much as a word to anyone and goes off to find her best friend. This whole thing is her fault anyway.
See, Scooter’s wife – now ex-wife, I suppose – left him for their periodontist because she found him “stimulating and exciting”. And this is a guy who slices gums for a living, a’ight? Which means Scooter must be really boring. So anyway, his seven year old, Crystal, is just like her mother. Bad attitude, and she doesn’t love Scooter. Sad, isn’t it? That’s her daddy, mind you. And she’s seven. Yeah. She's a darling little girl.
Okay, so he starts living out of his best friend Erica’s and her husband, Eric’s trailer. For about a day or two, in which he discovers Eric and Erica aren’t happy and Eric tells him he’s really happy for him because he’s free. And then Erica gets this crazy idea, and says that Scooter needs to write a book. A nonfiction book, about his quest for his woman. But to make it fun and exciting. The problem? When you go looking for trouble, you usually find it. Which, clearly, he did.
So she finds ghost town empty, save for a guy who’s looking for Adonna and Randy. She says she’s looking for Scooter, and they decide to off searching for them together. Eventually, they find them in New Mexico, and Scooter is completely insane. Like, nutty. Not mean insane, just crazy. As in, ooh-look-at-the-pretty-froot-loops-isn’t-this-great-oh-my-goodness-the-sky-is-so-blue! Kind of crazy. Like a little kid on a sugar rush. Except it lasts all the freaking time. And he giggles.
Oh my gosh, there was so much giggling, mostly – if not all – from Scooter, I was beginning to wonder about the sexual tendencies of the male characters. Seriously. Guys don’t giggle. Not even “band-fags”, as the author put it so fantastically. Guys chuckle. They smirk. They’re smartasses. But They. Do. Not. Giggle. If I never hear the phrase “band-fags” or the term “giggle” again, it will be too soon. It was overused. And that’s an understatement.
So anyway, then it switches to Eric’s point of view, and I haven’t really explained what’s so bad about him. And there’s nothing really wrong with him. He’s just….. he’s really into God. And there’s nothing wrong with that. I’m all for it, in fact. But he’s an extremist. Which would be okay, if he didn’t try to cram it down everyone else’s throats.
Every time something goes wrong, he acts like he’s Nicodemus or something, and I don’t even know who that is (which is sad, on my part), and starts touching their head and praying. I can understand why Erica and Scooter get so fed up with him. He doesn’t know the meaning of the words “personal” and “space”, much less when you add them together. You know he made her have seven kids? SEVEN. He wanted more-more-more-more-more.
So anyway, Eric finds Scooter acting like he’s high as a kite with a shit-eating grin on his face, and he desperately wants to find his wife. Eventually, he does, and she’s off with Handsome Jimmy, the guy who she met back in ghost town, and Adonna, eating Mexican food. He calls the cops, who are looking for Scooter and Adonna at this point, and gets a gun shoved in his face. Erica decides she needs to go back home to her family, and the go outside right as the cops arrive. Of course, everyone else has already fled, because Handsome Jimmy pulled a gun on Eric, remember? So of course everyone is going to flee the scene. Which, they did.
So now cops have surrounded the building, and only Handsome Jimmy, Adonna, and loopy Scooter are left inside. Scooter, being the crazy little bird he is at this point, decides to run outside, gun blazing, in a last-ditch effort to save his new buds, so he can die while they try to sneak out the back, despite their protests, saying that the building is surrounded and there’s no way they can sneak out the back and make a quick getaway. But he’s too far gone to listen to even them.
So of course he gets shot down, and Eric and Erica, being cut off from the argument they’re having, watch their best friend (her best friend, really) die a gruesome and bloody death. Wonderful, I know. At which point Eric realizes that Erica always loved Scooter and that he’s the one she should have married, not him. A little late for that, I’d say, considering they’re all forty years old and Scooter’s now dead, but I guess epiphanies come when they do. Eric always was a little slow on the uptake, though, so I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised.
Adonna and Handsome Jimmy decide that there’s no way to get out of this one, and walk out with their hands up. Erica says she’ll come home and pretend for Eric’s sake. She’ll be the good little church going housewife he wants her to be, but she won’t be happy. She’ll pretend to be happy, and go to all the bible-studies and be his little trophy wife, under the knowledge that she may leave again. But, she will no longer believe in God.
So. Then it goes back to Erica’s point of view. A little time has passed. Scooter was buried. Jane didn’t even come; Crystal was bored and eager to get to soccer practice. And she up and leaves. Forever. She becomes a runaway for good. Leaves behind all seven of her children. She doesn’t even pack anything. All she takes are the clothes on her back and her keys and her car. The end.
This book was HORRIBLE. I honestly saw no point to it, and all the characters acted like they were twenty, when in reality, they’re all at least forty years old. Scary, isn’t it? I thought so. I hate this book. It was just…. no. No one should read this. I regret wasting my time on it.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
December 1, 2021
For the most part I was tempted to give Runaways a 4 Star rating. I downgraded it to a 3 just because of the way the story had me feeling by the end. I won't put any spoilers in this post. However, I will say that the idea of what the main characters are running from and running toward is prominent but ambiguous throughout. I must say, the characters in the book are all losers, especially Scooter (sorry if that is a spoiler). Philosophically and realistically, everyone has the same choices to make as these characters do. Life can be burdensome, even to the point of creating situations that might cause you to want to disappear, which is essentially what these characters are trying to do. What is freedom? How does one find and thrive without rules, laws, stable relationships, supportive social structures, etc. Some of the characters in the book learn exactly what happens when they try to live in that "free" space. In the end, the main female character makes a choice between two false options. We are left to wonder how she could possibly survive even if, or even especially if, she finds the freedom she is seeking.
February 8, 2021
A midlife crisis leads to looking for an old high school crush and assuming they would want to hook up. Instead the search leads to a crazy romp and crime spree through the desert. Offensive use of language that most people know not to use these days...fag, retard, breeder. Had potential but was immaturely written.
April 8, 2020
Pretty good read.
Moved along nicely.
Eric's harping on Jesus got old fast, but then I guess it was supposed to. There was so much violence that was only in Scooters imagination that when it really happened I didn't buy it. But overall, I had a good time.
Moved along nicely.
Eric's harping on Jesus got old fast, but then I guess it was supposed to. There was so much violence that was only in Scooters imagination that when it really happened I didn't buy it. But overall, I had a good time.
December 4, 2020
Reading this book was a waste of valuable time. Our daily lives do not need to be impacted by idiot characters who fly with the wind. Their are better ways to handle your problems -- or maybe you should wake up sooner and do something about your relationships before they tank.
August 11, 2021
Take a deep breath
This novel is a whirlwind of action and emotion. The characters and location combine to empress and startle. It's a quick read so clear your calendar for one satisfying day.
This novel is a whirlwind of action and emotion. The characters and location combine to empress and startle. It's a quick read so clear your calendar for one satisfying day.
Read
November 30, 2019Meh.
August 9, 2022
Skip this one!
January 29, 2021
I enjoyed this book. It is a cross between Cormac McCarthy and T.C. Boyle. Lots of interesting twists.
November 9, 2021
Suck!!!
April 14, 2010
I had to get up at 3:00 in the morning to finish "Runaways". I had to make myself stop reading at midnight because I had to get up early the next morning but I could not sleep; I was absolutely compelled to finish the book. It was mesmerizing. The characters, the storyline, everything.
Nothing was as I expected, different from anything I have ever read and I read a LOT! What a find. This story is going to be with me for a long time; I'm going to be haunted. Scooter and Erica - I swear I knew them in high school. In back of the band bus.
Nothing was as I expected, different from anything I have ever read and I read a LOT! What a find. This story is going to be with me for a long time; I'm going to be haunted. Scooter and Erica - I swear I knew them in high school. In back of the band bus.
May 7, 2010
Jimmy "Scotter" Biffman decides to listen to his best friend, Erica, and pursue an old high school crush with the intention of writing a money-making book. Things go rapidly downhill from there for everyone except the reader! Filled with great (though in some parts R-rated) dialog, funny and fantastic adventures and interesting characters, Runaways is a great escapist read. Wonderful book to win on Goodreads!
January 27, 2011
Jimmy Scotter Biffman decides to listen to Erica his best friend and pursue an old high school crush with the intention of writing a book. Things rapidly go downhill . Filled with great dialog, funny and some fantastic adventures. The characters are interesting. This is an escapist read. Throughly enjoyed it.
May 19, 2010
"Runaways" was an easy, quick read. Somewhat of a 'fantasy' story, in that, when faced with hard times, or bad luck, who doesn't think about/fantasize about going off and doing something totally outside their normal way of life? It made me think about advice I often give to my kids: "Don't settle."
I won this book on "Goodreads".
I won this book on "Goodreads".
Want to read
January 25, 2010Just came across this free download on goodreads and the summary looks interesting. I think it's worth a read.
July 6, 2010
Fun to read ... felt as though I went through the journey myself ... love to read in first person ... well written and good flow to story.
August 7, 2020
What a strange book. Seems like something he wrote for NaNoWriMo and then published after having a friend edit it. I liked some of the ideas but it really goes off the rails about halfway through.
Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews