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If You Have to Cry, Go Outside: And Other Things Your Mother Never Told You
In the New York Times bestseller If You Have to Cry, Go Outside , media maven Kelly Cutrone spills her secrets for success without selling out. She combines personal and professional stories from her high-profile gigs as Whitney Port and Lauren Conrad’s boss on The Hills , star of Bravo's Kell on Earth , judge on America’s Next Top Model , and CEO/founder of the fashion PR firm People’s Revolution to offer young professional women no-nonsense, brutally honest career advice—and other things their mothers never told them.
208 pages, Paperback
First published February 2, 2009
223 people are currently reading
4698 people want to read
About the author
Kelly Cutrone
5 books124 followersKelly Cutrone is the founder of the fashion public relations, branding, and marketing firm People's Revolution, which has represented clients such as Longchamp, Vivienne Westwood, Valentino, Jeremy Scott, Paco Rabanne, Thierry Mugler, Bulgari, Christie's, and more. She stars in Kell on Earth on Bravo and has appeared on MTV's The Hills and The City. Prior to founding People's Revolution, Cutrone cofounded Cutrone & Weinberg and was the director of PR for Spin magazine. Cutrone lives in Manhattan with her daughter, Ava.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 526 reviews
March 10, 2013
Soooo...leave the burbs, do a ton of drugs, sex and booze it up in NYC, create your own religion, talk shit yet take none, don't cry at work and be true to your own dreams. There...I just read the book to you. You're welcome.
For the record, my mom kicked ass in the 70s in corporate America so her advice and guidance has been much more useful than anything I read here. BTW...I had to read this for book club and I'd never heard of this woman prior to the selection.
For the record, my mom kicked ass in the 70s in corporate America so her advice and guidance has been much more useful than anything I read here. BTW...I had to read this for book club and I'd never heard of this woman prior to the selection.
July 4, 2011
A good friend recommended this book so I wanted to read it from cover to cover.... And i wanted o love it I hated every minute of it... I kept hoping the book would improve. I thought that I'd suddenly turn a corner with Kelly and realize that she had stopped being a self-indulgent, go against the grain just to create waves, name dropping, self important person. Sadly, that never happened and I breathed a huge sigh of relief when I finished the last page.
The major theme through this book is to create your own religion. She warns not to worship inside a temple, church, whatever because you're limited in that capacity. What she fails to recognize is that her polytheistic approach to her "religious beliefs" leaves her twisting the word of all leaders, all people she might consider to be her God(s) and creates her own ideal. She even goes so far as to brag about this. As a Christian, I was offended several times when she reaffirmed society's tainted view that a woman can not possibly find herself in motherhood, by being a wife, by working in her church or by having a career that isn't the sole focus on her life. Should everyone by a stay-at-home mother and wife who bakes cookies all day and makes sure the house is spotless? NO! In fact it would put most women in their graves. I get that. What Kelly fails to do is recognize that there are some mothers who aren't failing to meet their fullest potential because they do choose to stay at home, bake cookies and do their best to make sure their house is spotless... and fail miserably in most cases. I'm not easily offended. I too have a mouth that needs reminding once in a while. If you're offended by bad language, Kelly makes an art out of using the "f" word repeatedly through this book. I wasn't bothered by this so much as disappointed. Apparently, according to Kelly, she is a very intelligent and accomplished woman. I would hope that she would be more creative in her word choice. Of course, again according to her, it's because she's successful that I criticize her.
Kelly's book is almost a handbook of sorts for anyone that might dare work for her. She talks about how abusive she is to her interns but then quickly makes it okay, again by twisting words, by explaining that she's really just taking care of them and teaching them valuable lessons. She creates social classes in her office by not allowing her interns to eat until everyone else has.... yea, that's cool Kelly. It's all about power and social status that determines one's value right? Go ahead and put down arranged marriages in other cultures that you don't understand but foster the caste system while you're at it.
As I became increasingly angry, I started to come up with choice phrases to call her. As luck would have it, she ends her book with a chapter explaining that it's okay to be a "Bitch." Of course it is because that's exactly what she has touted throughout this book. This book did nothing for me and I definitely don't recommend it.
The major theme through this book is to create your own religion. She warns not to worship inside a temple, church, whatever because you're limited in that capacity. What she fails to recognize is that her polytheistic approach to her "religious beliefs" leaves her twisting the word of all leaders, all people she might consider to be her God(s) and creates her own ideal. She even goes so far as to brag about this. As a Christian, I was offended several times when she reaffirmed society's tainted view that a woman can not possibly find herself in motherhood, by being a wife, by working in her church or by having a career that isn't the sole focus on her life. Should everyone by a stay-at-home mother and wife who bakes cookies all day and makes sure the house is spotless? NO! In fact it would put most women in their graves. I get that. What Kelly fails to do is recognize that there are some mothers who aren't failing to meet their fullest potential because they do choose to stay at home, bake cookies and do their best to make sure their house is spotless... and fail miserably in most cases. I'm not easily offended. I too have a mouth that needs reminding once in a while. If you're offended by bad language, Kelly makes an art out of using the "f" word repeatedly through this book. I wasn't bothered by this so much as disappointed. Apparently, according to Kelly, she is a very intelligent and accomplished woman. I would hope that she would be more creative in her word choice. Of course, again according to her, it's because she's successful that I criticize her.
Kelly's book is almost a handbook of sorts for anyone that might dare work for her. She talks about how abusive she is to her interns but then quickly makes it okay, again by twisting words, by explaining that she's really just taking care of them and teaching them valuable lessons. She creates social classes in her office by not allowing her interns to eat until everyone else has.... yea, that's cool Kelly. It's all about power and social status that determines one's value right? Go ahead and put down arranged marriages in other cultures that you don't understand but foster the caste system while you're at it.
As I became increasingly angry, I started to come up with choice phrases to call her. As luck would have it, she ends her book with a chapter explaining that it's okay to be a "Bitch." Of course it is because that's exactly what she has touted throughout this book. This book did nothing for me and I definitely don't recommend it.
August 14, 2012
I bought this book after watching Kelly Cutrone's show on Bravo. I admired her tough, no BS attitude but also how she also managed to be endearing at the same time. She seemed like a good role-model so I was excited to read her book to learn more about her but I mainly was interested in her career advice. However the first half of the book with Cutrone's memoirs was a little tough to get through. Most of the time it seemed more like she was bragging rather than "telling it like it is (or was)" with her constant name dropping of now-irrelevant 'celebs' of the late 80s and her impromptu trips to the Hamptons with rich artist boyfriends. She also seemed uncomfortably nonchalant and blunt on describing some of her early "bad girl" experiences in New York (like sleeping with older men and scoring drugs from Italian dukes). Some of her experiences seemed a bit in-genuine but still somewhat entertaining to read so continued on with the book.
Her real advice doesn't really start till the last 2 or 3 chapters of the book. While the advice is why I essentially read the book I would ever take anything she wrote too seriously. Like the whole "creating your own religion" thing was too much for me. And her list of "power-girl movies", had some pretty horrible examples. Some of her other lists and "rules" were more obvious than informative. While I read some of her advice I could hear myself saying "Thanks but I already know that and I'm sure most working women do."
But I would still recommend the book to young women either just entering college or coming out of college and into the work force. Just so long they can get past Cutrone's self-indulgent memoirs without wanting the close the book and throw it out the window.
Her real advice doesn't really start till the last 2 or 3 chapters of the book. While the advice is why I essentially read the book I would ever take anything she wrote too seriously. Like the whole "creating your own religion" thing was too much for me. And her list of "power-girl movies", had some pretty horrible examples. Some of her other lists and "rules" were more obvious than informative. While I read some of her advice I could hear myself saying "Thanks but I already know that and I'm sure most working women do."
But I would still recommend the book to young women either just entering college or coming out of college and into the work force. Just so long they can get past Cutrone's self-indulgent memoirs without wanting the close the book and throw it out the window.
June 10, 2010
I thought this book was total crap. Kelly is not as smart as she thinks she is, and her "advice" -- like making her assistants wait until after everyone else has finished eating to have the leftovers-- is terrible. It's like "how to be a mean girl boss 101." She has a lot of half-baked spiritual beliefs, which are cobbled together from yoga, psychic readings, half-understood Native American beliefs, and watered-down second wave feminism. I found this book annoying, repetitive, and mostly just stupid.
October 20, 2021
I decided to read this book because I've always had an interest in transitioning into publicity/PR and the book sounded like a great read for female professionals. I thought that, though I'm not necessarily interested in fashion, this would offer some solid career tips from someone that has seen it all. It did have a few tips here and there about being tough, but ultimately, it is titled and positioned incorrectly. It isn't about lessons for career women, but rather the author's memoir about how she landed a career in the fashion PR industry after a drug-ridden and messy period of time earlier in life. There is also an out-of-place section on her spirituality and there are spiritual tips sprinkled throughout.
In fact, the lessons for the readers don't actually start until page 149 in the chapter - "If You Have to Cry, Go Outside." Up until that point, it is a story about how she was addicted to drugs, was saved by her powerful tribe at times, and eventually became really successful. The name-dropping is a bit much. We get from the start that she knows and has worked with some well-known celebrities, but it is overly discussed throughout.
I wasn't looking for a tale of morality, but the whole thing seemed rather shallow. In a section titled "Everything Good Happens After Thirty," one bullet point of advice is: "it's time to step it up a notch and charge headlong into the land of overpriced luxury accessories." Is that really an important part of turning 30? And as my review title states - it is extremely over-indulgent and self-inflated. For example, on page 100 she writes, "A lot of women ask me, 'How do you have it all?'"
If you are curious of the inner workings of the fashion PR industry or if you are a fan of Kelly Cutrone, then it would be a good book for you. She is witty and there were parts that were interesting. If you are a career woman looking for solid advice on being powerful, I think there might be better sources of inspiration for you.
In fact, the lessons for the readers don't actually start until page 149 in the chapter - "If You Have to Cry, Go Outside." Up until that point, it is a story about how she was addicted to drugs, was saved by her powerful tribe at times, and eventually became really successful. The name-dropping is a bit much. We get from the start that she knows and has worked with some well-known celebrities, but it is overly discussed throughout.
I wasn't looking for a tale of morality, but the whole thing seemed rather shallow. In a section titled "Everything Good Happens After Thirty," one bullet point of advice is: "it's time to step it up a notch and charge headlong into the land of overpriced luxury accessories." Is that really an important part of turning 30? And as my review title states - it is extremely over-indulgent and self-inflated. For example, on page 100 she writes, "A lot of women ask me, 'How do you have it all?'"
If you are curious of the inner workings of the fashion PR industry or if you are a fan of Kelly Cutrone, then it would be a good book for you. She is witty and there were parts that were interesting. If you are a career woman looking for solid advice on being powerful, I think there might be better sources of inspiration for you.
May 20, 2011
My boss gave me a chapter from this book when I was having a hard time seeing eye-to-eye with a co-worker, who also happens to have a strong workplace personality. I read it on the train and came in the next morning breathless and excited about what I had read. My enthusiasm scored me major points with the boss, and she lent me the entire book the same day.
Cutrone is a bully. That's what really made me like this book, because - despite that - I like her. She's an unapologetic, vicious, caring, pushy, understanding, condescending, supportive contradiction. She's also aware of that and embraces it as part of her essential philosophy, which makes her among the most endearing autobiographers I've ever read.
Kelly, sorry but I broke your first rule this week at work. I cried - a lot - but I followed a lot more of the ideologies that you're so unapologetic about - and super successful with.
I have no doubts whatsoever that Cutrone is shaping a generation of strong contradictory women to follow in her monochromatic footsteps. Great book.
Cutrone is a bully. That's what really made me like this book, because - despite that - I like her. She's an unapologetic, vicious, caring, pushy, understanding, condescending, supportive contradiction. She's also aware of that and embraces it as part of her essential philosophy, which makes her among the most endearing autobiographers I've ever read.
Kelly, sorry but I broke your first rule this week at work. I cried - a lot - but I followed a lot more of the ideologies that you're so unapologetic about - and super successful with.
I have no doubts whatsoever that Cutrone is shaping a generation of strong contradictory women to follow in her monochromatic footsteps. Great book.
February 28, 2010
Kelly Cutrone is the founder of People’s Revolution, a fashion PR firm based in New York City. I’ve been watching her show on Bravo, Kell On Earth, and I find her puzzling. Sometimes she comes across as a savvy, ballsy businesswoman, refusing to take any lip from anybody. But on the other hand, most of the time she appears to be erratic, flighty and more than a bit unhinged. I got her new book, hoping to learn more. I’m fascinated by anything relating to the fashion industry, so I thought it would be a peek into what goes on behind the scenes from a PR standpoint.
Boy, was I wrong. Instead of a memoir chronicling Kelly’s rise to success, I found a meandering paean to... goddess worship? Yep, Kelly’s off-the-deep-end nutty about finding your own religious path, finding the goddess in yourself, studying something called the Universal Mother, and rejecting all the rules, traditions and religion foisted on you by your parents. Kelly believes they don’t know what’s best for you, so you’ve got to figure it all out for yourself. Instead of doing what she’d hoped, which is inspire young women setting out on a career in business, Kelly instead shows the ugliest parts of herself and celebrates them because they’re part of her true “self”.
She marries a guy who tells her to have an abortion when she gets pregnant. She does what he says, but then says that all she sees when she looks at him is a “baby killer”. And then in the next breath she tells you the obvious, that she’s all for abortion. She eventually divorces him after he grabs a ceremonial blade off the wall and tries to kill her. Later she has a fling with a guy and gets pregnant, keeping the baby this time. But when her daughter is born, she gives her the last name of her abusive ex-husband. What a mess.
Kelly Cutrone is a woman who is incredibly confused, has a low self-image due to years of abuse of her body and crazy religious dabbling, and is a terrible manager of her company (you only have to watch her TV show to figure that out quickly). How this woman has any success is a total mystery, but then again, how a lot of loonies in the fashion industry have any success is just as confusing.
Young girls who haven't figured themselves out yet might find parts of this book to be empowering and make them feel like they can take over the world. The rest of us, the grown women who have figured ourselves out and know what a joke Kelly's worldview and message are, just roll our eyes and laugh.
(Kelly and her staff like to troll the Internet for any mention of her or the company, and then bad-mouth the negative stuff on Twitter. Hi, y'all! Feel free to link to my review, you nutjobs!)
Boy, was I wrong. Instead of a memoir chronicling Kelly’s rise to success, I found a meandering paean to... goddess worship? Yep, Kelly’s off-the-deep-end nutty about finding your own religious path, finding the goddess in yourself, studying something called the Universal Mother, and rejecting all the rules, traditions and religion foisted on you by your parents. Kelly believes they don’t know what’s best for you, so you’ve got to figure it all out for yourself. Instead of doing what she’d hoped, which is inspire young women setting out on a career in business, Kelly instead shows the ugliest parts of herself and celebrates them because they’re part of her true “self”.
She marries a guy who tells her to have an abortion when she gets pregnant. She does what he says, but then says that all she sees when she looks at him is a “baby killer”. And then in the next breath she tells you the obvious, that she’s all for abortion. She eventually divorces him after he grabs a ceremonial blade off the wall and tries to kill her. Later she has a fling with a guy and gets pregnant, keeping the baby this time. But when her daughter is born, she gives her the last name of her abusive ex-husband. What a mess.
Kelly Cutrone is a woman who is incredibly confused, has a low self-image due to years of abuse of her body and crazy religious dabbling, and is a terrible manager of her company (you only have to watch her TV show to figure that out quickly). How this woman has any success is a total mystery, but then again, how a lot of loonies in the fashion industry have any success is just as confusing.
Young girls who haven't figured themselves out yet might find parts of this book to be empowering and make them feel like they can take over the world. The rest of us, the grown women who have figured ourselves out and know what a joke Kelly's worldview and message are, just roll our eyes and laugh.
(Kelly and her staff like to troll the Internet for any mention of her or the company, and then bad-mouth the negative stuff on Twitter. Hi, y'all! Feel free to link to my review, you nutjobs!)
August 15, 2013
Kelly Cutrone, as a judge on America's Next Top model, comes across a nasty piece of work. Sometimes her honesty is refreshing, but I think there's a fine line between refreshing and ice cold. She's not above taking a cheap shot in the pursuit of wit, and many of her comments have left a bad taste in my mouth.
So I don't know what made me think I would feel differently after reading her memoirs. I think the title grabbed me, and I wanted to be proven wrong; maybe there's something I'm missing about this opinionated old windbag that she's so successful yet so (on TV at least) unlikeable.
Unfortunately I'm still baffled. Her book comes across as the self-indugent ramblings of a person who's stumbled across a goldmine of lucky breaks the aspiring PR could only dream about, and who, despite her self-confessed lack of aim, drug abuse, failed personal relationships and general litany of life mistakes, has the temerity to profess to have the ultimate map of success.
Perhaps I am missing something but I'm not feeling the "Mama Wolf" vibe (shudder) - perhaps it is too shrouded in egocentricity for my liking - and just to be further off-putting, there were enough mentions of Inner Goddesses and new age bullshit here to fuel a whole other sequel to Fifty Shades of Grey.
To give Kelly her due I think she's probably a very good publicist, because you do have to have big hairy balls to say it like it is in the pandering, syncophantic world of PR. Then again, I can't imagine how she pleases the 90% of clients who want "the spin", who pay for the spin, and would hardly like being told their product or business is shit. Bees.... honey? A little doesn't hurt occasionally and hardly makes one disingenuous, just a functioning member of society.
So if I want to cry? I'll do it wherever I please, and thank god Kelly Cutrone has never been my boss!
So I don't know what made me think I would feel differently after reading her memoirs. I think the title grabbed me, and I wanted to be proven wrong; maybe there's something I'm missing about this opinionated old windbag that she's so successful yet so (on TV at least) unlikeable.
Unfortunately I'm still baffled. Her book comes across as the self-indugent ramblings of a person who's stumbled across a goldmine of lucky breaks the aspiring PR could only dream about, and who, despite her self-confessed lack of aim, drug abuse, failed personal relationships and general litany of life mistakes, has the temerity to profess to have the ultimate map of success.
Perhaps I am missing something but I'm not feeling the "Mama Wolf" vibe (shudder) - perhaps it is too shrouded in egocentricity for my liking - and just to be further off-putting, there were enough mentions of Inner Goddesses and new age bullshit here to fuel a whole other sequel to Fifty Shades of Grey.
To give Kelly her due I think she's probably a very good publicist, because you do have to have big hairy balls to say it like it is in the pandering, syncophantic world of PR. Then again, I can't imagine how she pleases the 90% of clients who want "the spin", who pay for the spin, and would hardly like being told their product or business is shit. Bees.... honey? A little doesn't hurt occasionally and hardly makes one disingenuous, just a functioning member of society.
So if I want to cry? I'll do it wherever I please, and thank god Kelly Cutrone has never been my boss!
September 15, 2012
For the first half of this book, I planned to give it two stars at most. I was annoyed that Cutrone said she wasn't really that smart (you don't accomplish what she's accomplished by NOT being smart, even if it's not necessarily book smarts), and I was REALLY annoyed at the amount of time dedicated to her spiritual awakening (while reeling from drugs) and all the talk of the Universal Goddess and her spiritual guide. That's just not my thing.
But then came the focal point of the book: the chapter titled "If You Have to Cry, Go Outside." This is what really got me going--I wish this had been the whole book. Cutrone speaks of her no-nonsense way of working with her employees, of being Mama Wolf and protecting her employees while pushing them to be their best. She says the office isn't a family, so you shouldn't treat your coworkers like your parents. She says women can't expect to be treated the same as men if they're not willing to do the same work. She says you need to know your place in the office but that doesn't mean you shouldn't have an opinion if you're entry-level; you just need to know how to express it. She says working hard is the baseline--you're not going to succeed if you're not going to put in the work. I loved this. It made me want to cheer.
Three stars because one great chapter in nine just won't cut it.
But then came the focal point of the book: the chapter titled "If You Have to Cry, Go Outside." This is what really got me going--I wish this had been the whole book. Cutrone speaks of her no-nonsense way of working with her employees, of being Mama Wolf and protecting her employees while pushing them to be their best. She says the office isn't a family, so you shouldn't treat your coworkers like your parents. She says women can't expect to be treated the same as men if they're not willing to do the same work. She says you need to know your place in the office but that doesn't mean you shouldn't have an opinion if you're entry-level; you just need to know how to express it. She says working hard is the baseline--you're not going to succeed if you're not going to put in the work. I loved this. It made me want to cheer.
Three stars because one great chapter in nine just won't cut it.
September 16, 2011
Kelly Cutrone has appeared on the The Hills, The City and her own series Kell on Earth. She also runs People’s Evolution. If You Have to Cry, Go Outside: And Other Things Your Mother Never Told You surprised me. I didn’t expect much but I really enjoyed some of the key messages of the book:
1. Believe in Yourself
2. Find and listen to your inner voice
3. Focus on building a Tribe
4. Work hard
5. Give back
Cutrone is unapologetic about the need to work hard and pay your dues to the extent that no one in her office eats until the people higher up than them in the hierarchy have eaten. She is deeply committed to pay it forward and breaking the cycle of women competing, backstabbing and manipulating each other in order to get ahead. She lost me a little in the passages that explained her spirituality, but inspired me as some of the chapters read as pep talks. She is also committed to telling the truth. This is a good book for someone who is going through a transition – graduation, job transition, etc. It’s not as heavy handed as some books I have read and offers some good practical advice.
1. Believe in Yourself
2. Find and listen to your inner voice
3. Focus on building a Tribe
4. Work hard
5. Give back
Cutrone is unapologetic about the need to work hard and pay your dues to the extent that no one in her office eats until the people higher up than them in the hierarchy have eaten. She is deeply committed to pay it forward and breaking the cycle of women competing, backstabbing and manipulating each other in order to get ahead. She lost me a little in the passages that explained her spirituality, but inspired me as some of the chapters read as pep talks. She is also committed to telling the truth. This is a good book for someone who is going through a transition – graduation, job transition, etc. It’s not as heavy handed as some books I have read and offers some good practical advice.
May 8, 2012
I'd say this review is pretty spoiler heavy. I guess.
I didn't know anything about Kelly Cutrone before reading this book. Okay, I knew a little, but only what had been told to me from watching her on Dr. Phil.
But, I knew nothing about this book going in. I thought it might be about tips for women going into the "man's workplace" or some crap like that. Similar to the book, Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office. So, I went expecting the same feelings I had after reading Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office: torn between that it contained some useful information and some that was just sexist.
Although this book did give some some advice to that extent, it wasn't fully what the book was about. And, thankfully, it wasn't sexist. In fact, Kelly seems very full blown liberal feminist, which I cheer! (even if I don't agree with everything she says!)
When I started into the book, I felt it was a book about chasing your dreams and living up to your full potential. I love those books and was eating it up. Everything she was writing about seemed to be written just for me. It was wonderful.
Then she got into the stories of her life: mistakes, rushing into things, being young and stupid (i.e., drugs, sex, etc.) I didn't live that life and so, it suddenly didn't really mean much to me anymore. It was interesting, but it no longer speaking directly to me.
After that, it was hit or miss. She gave the occasional piece of good information. She seems open-minded and I respect her spiritualism. Like her, I've (in a way) created my own religion, taking what I trust to be true in my heart and living my life as a good person, based on these truths.
She takes pride in being and redefining the word "bitch", which is awesome. Except, my opinion is that you should only be one if you have to. Starting battles is not being a bitch or being a feminist. It's being a hateful, spiteful person.
I also can't fully agree with the way she lives her life. I don't agree with how rude she is to people, even if she thinks it's justified. But, I guess that's how she gets her money and fame.
Another downside to the book, for me, was the fact that I don't care about fashion at all. Most of her examples when discussing careers were regarding fashion. I understand why that would be, since that's what she is knowledgeable about. It just doesn't interest me.
But, I knew I was completely over the book when on page 169 when she told an "amusing" (personally, I found it to be over-the-top harsh) anecdote about bitching out a persons assistant over the phone ("'What did I just do?' I replied. 'I gave you the dates, I gave you the terms, you're the assistant, you write it up and give it to your boss! You fucking write the email!'") Then, just two pages later on page 171, she tells another one where she bothers a different person's assistant until they give her what she wants. She uses a footnote to add "This is another important lesson: always be nice to other people's assistants."
In summary, I gave it two stars because:
1. Inconsistent in advice. If she's doing it to be funny, she failed.
2. Uninteresting to me having never been a wild-child. Also, being disinterested in a fabulous life of fashion, or learning how to be a "bitch."
3. Not having much to offer, IMO, as far as actual good advice is concerned.
I didn't know anything about Kelly Cutrone before reading this book. Okay, I knew a little, but only what had been told to me from watching her on Dr. Phil.
But, I knew nothing about this book going in. I thought it might be about tips for women going into the "man's workplace" or some crap like that. Similar to the book, Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office. So, I went expecting the same feelings I had after reading Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office: torn between that it contained some useful information and some that was just sexist.
Although this book did give some some advice to that extent, it wasn't fully what the book was about. And, thankfully, it wasn't sexist. In fact, Kelly seems very full blown liberal feminist, which I cheer! (even if I don't agree with everything she says!)
When I started into the book, I felt it was a book about chasing your dreams and living up to your full potential. I love those books and was eating it up. Everything she was writing about seemed to be written just for me. It was wonderful.
Then she got into the stories of her life: mistakes, rushing into things, being young and stupid (i.e., drugs, sex, etc.) I didn't live that life and so, it suddenly didn't really mean much to me anymore. It was interesting, but it no longer speaking directly to me.
After that, it was hit or miss. She gave the occasional piece of good information. She seems open-minded and I respect her spiritualism. Like her, I've (in a way) created my own religion, taking what I trust to be true in my heart and living my life as a good person, based on these truths.
She takes pride in being and redefining the word "bitch", which is awesome. Except, my opinion is that you should only be one if you have to. Starting battles is not being a bitch or being a feminist. It's being a hateful, spiteful person.
I also can't fully agree with the way she lives her life. I don't agree with how rude she is to people, even if she thinks it's justified. But, I guess that's how she gets her money and fame.
Another downside to the book, for me, was the fact that I don't care about fashion at all. Most of her examples when discussing careers were regarding fashion. I understand why that would be, since that's what she is knowledgeable about. It just doesn't interest me.
But, I knew I was completely over the book when on page 169 when she told an "amusing" (personally, I found it to be over-the-top harsh) anecdote about bitching out a persons assistant over the phone ("'What did I just do?' I replied. 'I gave you the dates, I gave you the terms, you're the assistant, you write it up and give it to your boss! You fucking write the email!'") Then, just two pages later on page 171, she tells another one where she bothers a different person's assistant until they give her what she wants. She uses a footnote to add "This is another important lesson: always be nice to other people's assistants."
In summary, I gave it two stars because:
1. Inconsistent in advice. If she's doing it to be funny, she failed.
2. Uninteresting to me having never been a wild-child. Also, being disinterested in a fabulous life of fashion, or learning how to be a "bitch."
3. Not having much to offer, IMO, as far as actual good advice is concerned.
July 31, 2012
I debated for a while about getting this book, but I'm so glad I did. When I first heard about this and eventually picked it up, I was expecting a how-to guide on succeeding in the world of business/PR/fashion, which are all ares of interest for me, especially the business and PR, so I bough it. I was a bit disappointed at the very beginning because she explicitly states that this is not a book on how to be a smart business woman. I thought, "well great, there goes $15". I kept reading anyway despite this.
This is definitely not a how-to type book. Its a book of life lessons and spirituality (yes, spirituality) for the modern day power girl and wannabe power girls everywhere. Kelly Cutrone shares her lessons with readers about her time spent in the industry and lessons learned about life, love, success, despair, and of course, business. Kelly approaches this book with her signature no nonsense attitude which is actually quite funny. She has a lot of great stories to share, some of which I thought were way out there.
I think this book is definitely worth the read. Kelly has lived an interesting life and after reading this I find her to be a fascinating person. Go check it out!
This is definitely not a how-to type book. Its a book of life lessons and spirituality (yes, spirituality) for the modern day power girl and wannabe power girls everywhere. Kelly Cutrone shares her lessons with readers about her time spent in the industry and lessons learned about life, love, success, despair, and of course, business. Kelly approaches this book with her signature no nonsense attitude which is actually quite funny. She has a lot of great stories to share, some of which I thought were way out there.
I think this book is definitely worth the read. Kelly has lived an interesting life and after reading this I find her to be a fascinating person. Go check it out!
March 12, 2016
I actually read this book in 2 sittings.
I picked it up at the beginning of September, read just slightly less than half I believe, thought it was stupid and entitled (oh my life has been so hard, but I've basically been given every opportunity and gone through every obstacle) Ugh. And the section on her religion really did me in. I can't stand hearing about someone's new -agey religion and how much it changes and affects their daily lives (heck I don't want to hear about established religion either, unless its how the MC is standing up to injustice or trying to find the truth underneath all the facade).
So I put the book down and believe it or not managed to finish Anna Karenina in its entirety before feeling the guilt that perhaps I should read the rest of this one (it is for an online bookclub after all). So tonight I picked it back up and read it in one sitting. Probably the most useful advice was in the chapter named for the book itself, which dealt with the work environment, how to be respectful, make yourself stand out and what not to do to avoid getting fired.
Definitely not a book I would recommend to anyone, unless you happened to be a big fan of this woman or something (I had never heard of her) but at least it was a quick read, relatively speaking.
I picked it up at the beginning of September, read just slightly less than half I believe, thought it was stupid and entitled (oh my life has been so hard, but I've basically been given every opportunity and gone through every obstacle) Ugh. And the section on her religion really did me in. I can't stand hearing about someone's new -agey religion and how much it changes and affects their daily lives (heck I don't want to hear about established religion either, unless its how the MC is standing up to injustice or trying to find the truth underneath all the facade).
So I put the book down and believe it or not managed to finish Anna Karenina in its entirety before feeling the guilt that perhaps I should read the rest of this one (it is for an online bookclub after all). So tonight I picked it back up and read it in one sitting. Probably the most useful advice was in the chapter named for the book itself, which dealt with the work environment, how to be respectful, make yourself stand out and what not to do to avoid getting fired.
Definitely not a book I would recommend to anyone, unless you happened to be a big fan of this woman or something (I had never heard of her) but at least it was a quick read, relatively speaking.
December 6, 2010
If you need motivation, explanation or just insight this is the perfect book. Kelly Cutrone is one of the most talented and amazing people I have ever read about. While this book is not as glamorous as many people have the impression of what Kelly does as glam, she has been through everything to get there. While things sound horrific at times there is a lesson to be learned about ever encounter and event. This not only motivated me to purse what I want to do with my life, it helped me to take my fear and use it to my advantage. You can always come back from the worst times in your life. Thank you Kelly I started my life because of your words.
January 4, 2013
Looking forward to this book for some time, I finally decided to cough up the twenty two dollars and get a hard copy. Ended up being disappointed with her less then professional advice, I felt as if this book were more of a memoir about things I wouldn't be comfortable bragging about.
The quotes and snippets I'd read before purchasing the book would have been enough (and less of a waste of my time, and money!)
I agree with pursuing your dreams and working hard, but to say that you can show up in NYC with no dreams, and no plan and turn into a PR marketing guru seems a bit far fetched and in-genuine to me.
The quotes and snippets I'd read before purchasing the book would have been enough (and less of a waste of my time, and money!)
I agree with pursuing your dreams and working hard, but to say that you can show up in NYC with no dreams, and no plan and turn into a PR marketing guru seems a bit far fetched and in-genuine to me.
April 13, 2015
This book comes across exactly like Kelly Cutrone, or what one would think Kelly Cutrone would come across in her book. Direct, self absorbed, and full of cliches. She grated on my nerves throughout the book, in fact I had to really push myself to finish without rolling my eyes every other chapter! Granted, some of the cliches were well said but these were few and far between the rest of the book.
June 16, 2010
I have always been a fan of "The Hills," and then Whitney Port's spinoff "The City." One of the characters who I loved the most was Kelly Cutrone. Her tell-it-like-it-is attitude and being a smart business woman was two of the things that I loved about her the most. It even made me love her even more when I started watching her Bravo show "Kell on Earth," and I found out that she was a single mother. Being a single mother who has her own business, I knew that this was a book that had to be on my must-read list. Yesterday, while waiting for Isabelle, who was doing her tutoring session, Cebastian and I went to the bookstore. I saw her book, and I picked it up.
It is a very easy read, and I read it that night. Cutrone talks about her venture to New York City and her journey to becoming the powerhouse that she is today. It was interesting to know that even she had her dark moments and was able to crawl out of them to become more enlightened and amazing than she was before. I realized that powerful women are not born that way, and you always have to fight to have the things and people that make you happy. Her book made me realize that you always have to remain positive, and when negative thoughts enter your head, it's your job to make them go away. One technique that I am going to use is when a negative thought like "I can't do this" pops up, I am going to go through every worst-case scenario because it's like Cutrone said, you usually realize that you will still be ok.
I will bring up the negative now because the other positive I got from the book is a big one. One thing that I hoped for was more tips and lessons that she could give the readers. However, she mainly talked about her Goddess, and I was left thinking, "Ok, so what are you trying to teach me?" I felt like the majority was about finding your own religion. Maybe for someone else this will enlighten him/her. However, for me, who has already read and researched many religions and has created her own thoughts on religion, I kept wanting more. I felt like I learned more from Janice Dickinson's book, "Check, Please," thank Cutrone's.
The second positive is a big one, like I said before. One thing that Cutrone said that resonated through me is you really have to sit down and think about what you really want; not what you were raised to think you want. I realized that since I was little, I've always wanted to be my own person, have children, and be successful in my business ventures. However, I never really cared about having anyone by my side. Even when I would play different stories with my sister and friends, marriage was not in the equation. I had someone I loved, but it never worked out in the end. When the kids were babies, while my older sister and mom were pushing me to marry their father, I never wanted to. I would tell them that I didn't believe marriage was for me. Slowly, I wanted to get married, but I realize now it's due to the pressures around me. Having this whole "perfect family" life with the white-picked fence is not my dream.
My dreams are for the kids and me to travel all over the world. Learn about life, enjoy spending time together, and just having a blast exploring the mysteries of the world. It's some life lessons from this book that I am thankful for.
It is a very easy read, and I read it that night. Cutrone talks about her venture to New York City and her journey to becoming the powerhouse that she is today. It was interesting to know that even she had her dark moments and was able to crawl out of them to become more enlightened and amazing than she was before. I realized that powerful women are not born that way, and you always have to fight to have the things and people that make you happy. Her book made me realize that you always have to remain positive, and when negative thoughts enter your head, it's your job to make them go away. One technique that I am going to use is when a negative thought like "I can't do this" pops up, I am going to go through every worst-case scenario because it's like Cutrone said, you usually realize that you will still be ok.
I will bring up the negative now because the other positive I got from the book is a big one. One thing that I hoped for was more tips and lessons that she could give the readers. However, she mainly talked about her Goddess, and I was left thinking, "Ok, so what are you trying to teach me?" I felt like the majority was about finding your own religion. Maybe for someone else this will enlighten him/her. However, for me, who has already read and researched many religions and has created her own thoughts on religion, I kept wanting more. I felt like I learned more from Janice Dickinson's book, "Check, Please," thank Cutrone's.
The second positive is a big one, like I said before. One thing that Cutrone said that resonated through me is you really have to sit down and think about what you really want; not what you were raised to think you want. I realized that since I was little, I've always wanted to be my own person, have children, and be successful in my business ventures. However, I never really cared about having anyone by my side. Even when I would play different stories with my sister and friends, marriage was not in the equation. I had someone I loved, but it never worked out in the end. When the kids were babies, while my older sister and mom were pushing me to marry their father, I never wanted to. I would tell them that I didn't believe marriage was for me. Slowly, I wanted to get married, but I realize now it's due to the pressures around me. Having this whole "perfect family" life with the white-picked fence is not my dream.
My dreams are for the kids and me to travel all over the world. Learn about life, enjoy spending time together, and just having a blast exploring the mysteries of the world. It's some life lessons from this book that I am thankful for.
February 11, 2010
Reading this book is like being unexpectedly invited to the It party of the season and somehow finding yourself in conversation with the It Girl of the party, the one everyone had raved about. During the conversation, the It Girl monopolizes most of the conversation, and you nod along and don't dare interject because what could you possibly have to say to top her stories of being part of the NYC 1980's scene? As she then goes on about her spirituality you start to wonder if she's high or drunk, but keep nodding along, while glancing around, looking for an escape route, and then, suddenly, her gaze gets a lot sharper as she moves away from nostalgia and looks you straight in the eye and gives you some straight talking advice on how to build a career, and at the end, you brush aside you reservations about her and are convinced its time to charge forward, fully embrace Grrl Power! and live your dreams!
The book roughly divides into three sections: 1980's: Sex, Drugs and Rock & Roll, the 1990's: Finding Religion, and the 2000's: Business.
She doesn't adhere to a strict time line - there is some jumping around in her description of her life evnts, but for the most part it follows in chronological order how she got to where she is now.
The final third, as she describes being a 21st century businesswoman, has the most concrete advice, especially for someone just starting out - and not just in the fashion industry.
The first two thirds of the book, on the other hand, documents what not to do when trying to make it in business as she describes everything a wide eyed girl from the 'burbs can do wrong when they come to the City to make it big.
She treats her moments of hitting rock bottom as opportunities to start fresh, which is in part the secret of her present success, and she stridently encourages the reader to dream big, to go for it, and never let other people tell you that you can't do something.
On a side note, she talks about the importance of honoring non-disclosure forms and not blaring you life to the world through social media, and she practices what she preaches - not a word in this book to suggest she was ever on a reality show.
October 10, 2010
If You Have To Cry Go Outside by Kelly Cutrone tells the story of Kelly Cutrone’s rise to the top of the fashion PR world. Filled with tid-bits of advice, Cutrone tells a raw and unedited tale of hardships, partying, hard work and finally success.
This book combines personal stories with professional advice. The mix of personal and professional makes for an insightful and entertaining read.
Think Cutrone was always a power bitch? Think again. Cutrone went through a serious struggle before she got to where she is today. She went through a period of time where she struggled with a drug addiction, couldn’t pay her rent and had no job. This memoir-esque book explains how with the help of good friends, she got out of that dark place in her life and made a name for herself in the fashion world.
I LOVED LOVED LOVED this book. As I’ve just graduated with a PR degree, this book was so interesting for me to read. I’ve loved Kelly Cutrone and her no nonsense attitude since I first saw her on The Hills a few years back. I obsessively watched her show on Bravo Kell On Earth, so it was clear that I needed to read this book. I devoured it in a day and a half, marked pages that I wanted to go back to and read and placed it on my shelf, ready to pick up again at any moment.
This book combines personal stories with professional advice. The mix of personal and professional makes for an insightful and entertaining read.
Think Cutrone was always a power bitch? Think again. Cutrone went through a serious struggle before she got to where she is today. She went through a period of time where she struggled with a drug addiction, couldn’t pay her rent and had no job. This memoir-esque book explains how with the help of good friends, she got out of that dark place in her life and made a name for herself in the fashion world.
I LOVED LOVED LOVED this book. As I’ve just graduated with a PR degree, this book was so interesting for me to read. I’ve loved Kelly Cutrone and her no nonsense attitude since I first saw her on The Hills a few years back. I obsessively watched her show on Bravo Kell On Earth, so it was clear that I needed to read this book. I devoured it in a day and a half, marked pages that I wanted to go back to and read and placed it on my shelf, ready to pick up again at any moment.
June 11, 2010
This book is about success, fashion PR C.E.O, Kelly Cutrone. The book talks about how to get started in PR business. It also talks about her early life and how to survive in NYC. The book has tips and tricks on how to get into fashion. The book is also about the people she met during her journey to being top PR company and how to keep friends and family close.
I can make a text to self connection. I actually know the author! We have been really close fiends ever since I was 7. She has brought me to all of her fashion shows and I have had an internship at peoples revolution, her PR company. Sometimes I just drop buy her office just to say hi! I can connect this because most of the things she talking about I can relate to because I know the stories behind it. It was fun to learn about her early life.
I would rate this book 5 stars. I thought it was really good. I really liked how she was truthful about everything that happened in her life. I also liked the way it was written. I thought it was very personal and spiritual and I liked it a lot! It was a very fun read. i would recommend this book to anyone who wants to get started i in the PR business
I can make a text to self connection. I actually know the author! We have been really close fiends ever since I was 7. She has brought me to all of her fashion shows and I have had an internship at peoples revolution, her PR company. Sometimes I just drop buy her office just to say hi! I can connect this because most of the things she talking about I can relate to because I know the stories behind it. It was fun to learn about her early life.
I would rate this book 5 stars. I thought it was really good. I really liked how she was truthful about everything that happened in her life. I also liked the way it was written. I thought it was very personal and spiritual and I liked it a lot! It was a very fun read. i would recommend this book to anyone who wants to get started i in the PR business
July 11, 2010
When I started watching "Kell on Earth" I was totally thinking that Kelly was my soul sister. She is the ballsy, in-your face New Yorker that I aspire to be while in New York (especially on subways and other places where assertiveness is required). Although I was expecting more of a tell-all from Kelly, I wasn't completely surprised that the PR Queen was strategic about the details of her personal life.
This book read as a series of career tips for her main audience-young girls aspiring to get into the fashion and/or PR business-as well as life lessons to be learned and/or mistakes to be avoided. I think she does a good job of counteracting the negative impression some may have of her with a very maternalistic, pro-fem, power-girl philosophy that says its OK to not live up to conventional female stereotypes and have a real career, not get married, etc... That part was cool.
The part that was not so cool-and also very distracting- was the plethora of pseudo-philsophizing about Indian gurus, inner voices, and warrior princesse that is probably only understandable to Kelly and seems to undermine her credibility to people that take her advice seriously.
This book read as a series of career tips for her main audience-young girls aspiring to get into the fashion and/or PR business-as well as life lessons to be learned and/or mistakes to be avoided. I think she does a good job of counteracting the negative impression some may have of her with a very maternalistic, pro-fem, power-girl philosophy that says its OK to not live up to conventional female stereotypes and have a real career, not get married, etc... That part was cool.
The part that was not so cool-and also very distracting- was the plethora of pseudo-philsophizing about Indian gurus, inner voices, and warrior princesse that is probably only understandable to Kelly and seems to undermine her credibility to people that take her advice seriously.
August 26, 2013
From seeing Kelly Cutrone on the hills, I love her. Her no BS, Smart-ass attitude is great...though at times, i thought it displayed some inner insecurity or weakness, it was usually for the better and I really fell in love with her. None of this translates into the book which I definitely tried very hard to read but couldn't even bring myself to finish. The book basically showed that she's self obsessed and only wanted to name drop and constantly portray herself as a martyr that has come from the bottom and built herself up into something that she thinks is "the top". Not very exciting after the first half of the book...unless you like to be lectured and made to feel as though her tasks were so impossible that you should only dream to get there. I guess the book might have been over-edited and any form of humanity or humility was extracted, leaving only the hard, bad parts of her personality instead of the somewhat more balanced hard worker that she is. In no way do I discredit her as a person, but this book just doesn't represent her in a flattering light and isn't recommended. 2 stars just because I like her, but this book symbolizes that even at the "top" one can be misled.
June 22, 2012
I have to admit, I thoroughly enjoyed this book. It was a quick read, but definitely a book with a ton of information that can be used for anyone, even if you don't have a future in fashion, like me. She's definitely not the type of woman, nor author, to sugarcoat anything. When you're reading, you're reading the truth - about love, work, and life in general. According to Kelly, we're raised in a Disney type of world, where the woman waits for her prince charming to come and rescue her. It's not like that, nor should it be. We each have our own inner voice, and if it's not screaming "GO FIND A HUSBAND BECAUSE YOU'RE 35!" and that's really your mother's voice, don't follow it. Follow your own path - whether it's marrying and becoming a stay at home mom, becoming the next big thing in the fashion world, or becoming an engineer. Whatever your calling is, follow it. She doesn't want us women to settle and follow our influential expectations of date - marry - live together - baby. Make up your own rules! Talk about girl power ;]
July 3, 2017
‘B*tch: a reflection of people’s lack of creativity & inability to acknowledge & embrace a powerful woman; a woman who won’t comply’
Have you happened to read Kelly Cutrone’s new book, 'If You Have to Cry, Go Outside?' Because I just finished it. The premise was all about personal experiences, funny anecdotes, embarrassing mistakes and a call for female empowerment. Some of it made me giggle … {see below}
Empowered women can’t wear wife-beaters? Guess I’m out. However, some of the book really rang true to me. And as corny as it sounds, gave me hope, strength, and ideas. Maybe because I am a young women looking for strong mentors. Or because I feel powerless or scared at one moment or other, nearly every day of my life.
Cutrone urges women to: “Gather up your courage like an armful of free clothes.”
Have you happened to read Kelly Cutrone’s new book, 'If You Have to Cry, Go Outside?' Because I just finished it. The premise was all about personal experiences, funny anecdotes, embarrassing mistakes and a call for female empowerment. Some of it made me giggle … {see below}
Empowered women can’t wear wife-beaters? Guess I’m out. However, some of the book really rang true to me. And as corny as it sounds, gave me hope, strength, and ideas. Maybe because I am a young women looking for strong mentors. Or because I feel powerless or scared at one moment or other, nearly every day of my life.
Cutrone urges women to: “Gather up your courage like an armful of free clothes.”
March 10, 2010
this came at the perfect point in my life.
i don't know how to explain it. it's very bare bones advice for life, but here's the thing - there is so much wisdom in it.
at least for someone like me. there were so many things that resonated with me, especially right now.
for example, the mantra of, you are not what you do.
i can't tell you what a reassurance that is for me right now. the job i have is simply to pay the bills, and sometimes i worry that i'll never get to grad school, never get to be living my dream.
this book has a high level of spirituality also, and it seems maybe a little hokey, but the thing is that if you know kelly, and you know how honest she is, then you realize that it's full of excellent advice.
i will seriously keep this book forever.
i don't know how to explain it. it's very bare bones advice for life, but here's the thing - there is so much wisdom in it.
at least for someone like me. there were so many things that resonated with me, especially right now.
for example, the mantra of, you are not what you do.
i can't tell you what a reassurance that is for me right now. the job i have is simply to pay the bills, and sometimes i worry that i'll never get to grad school, never get to be living my dream.
this book has a high level of spirituality also, and it seems maybe a little hokey, but the thing is that if you know kelly, and you know how honest she is, then you realize that it's full of excellent advice.
i will seriously keep this book forever.
January 11, 2011
Yikes, this book is poorly written garbage. I have a soft spot for the smart, snarky, and driven author, so I was disappointed. Kelly Cutrone feels the need to constantly remind the reader how thin she used to be and how rich and famous she is now. Bits and pieces of this book may be of interest to a young woman wanting a career in fashion (fully extend your arm to separate a crowd of people, a black bodysuit goes with everything, don't roll your eyes at work, etc.)but the vast majority of it is boring and obnoxious.
April 27, 2010
This book surprised me. Not because it was terribly well-written or life changing, but it does have some great advice for women. Especially those who aspire to be entrepreneurs or who hope to carve their own less-traditional path in life. I didn't agree with everything she said, but there are some useful tips for any woman who wants to succeed, even if they are told through the eyes of someone who holds a very sure and high opinion of herself.
October 29, 2012
I saw Kelly Cutrone on Dr. Phil's show. I knew nothing about her until then, and even after seeing her on the show, I wasn't moved to buy her book until I saw it in a bookstore. After reading the flyleaf, I purchased the book, and I am enjoying it. However, I expected it to be more about lessons she's learned from her job as a publicist than a personal history. Nevertheless, it is a good read.
December 18, 2011
This book is FANTASTIC. I'm long overdue in reading it, and I loved every single page for Cutrone's honesty, wisdom and no-holds-barred approach to building a strong career and internal foundation. I highly recommend it to anyone looking for a motivational read about life and business that comes from someone living her own path with her fair share of major traumas ("deaths" as she calls them). Not just for women either...
May 26, 2010
This book wasn't what I expected but I enjoyed it very much. It was more "this is my life story with random smatterings of advice thrown in" then anything else. As someone who doesn't have any desire to go into fashion (I just find Kelly pretty kickass), I found it enjoyable and I think it can translate pretty easily to people interested in other fields.
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