涙のタトゥー

by Garret Weyr, also Freymann-Weyr

Sophie's little brother died of leukemia two years ago and her memories of him are beginning to slip away. Then she meets Francis who lost someone too, and he begins to help Sophie find ways to remember.

Genres: Young Adult, Realistic Fiction, Teen, Fiction

Tankobon Hardcover

First published January 1, 2000

About the author

Garret Freymann-Weyr (rhymes with 'I'm on fire") is a novelist and teacher whose seven books have been banned, translated into a multitude of languages, and included in college curricula. She is a Printz honor award recipient and her short stories have been published in the Greensboro Review, the now sadly missed Christopher Street, and the anthology Starry Eyed. Her next book will be published under the name Garret Weyr (Divorce. Painful. Don't ask.)

She is a native of New York City and now lives with a large cat and a sweet dog. She reads too much, drinks too much tea, and loves listening to readers talk about their passions. She is studying Spanish. Has anyone else read "Buenas Noches, Luna?"

Reviews

[Shannon · Rating 4 out of 5]

I bought this book ages ago - long before my son was diagnosed with cancer - and, for obvious reasons, it has sat on the bookshelf unread since then. I decided to pick it up tonight, because I've been having a particularly hard time the past couple days with missing my son. I thought maybe reading a book about a child whose brother died might give me new ways to think about and deal with my own son's death. I don't know if it did that or not, but I did find it a good read. I enjoyed the way the main character, Sophie, thinks about her brother only at certain times (she calls these on-purpose memories). She tries to not let "accidental memories" creep in. I can totally understand that, because accidental memories can be crippling sometimes.

Overall, I'm glad I read the book, and it didn't make any of the things I'm dealing with any harder, so I guess that is a good thing.

[Katie · Rating 3 out of 5]

Sophie, a high school freshman, struggles with growing up and her fear of becoming an “A-Girl” (a girl, as Sophie defines it, who becomes boring, dumb, and superficial once she starts dating). Sophie leads a well-regulated life, studying hard, going to swimming practice, and honoring her brother, who died at age 8 of leukemia when Sophie was 12. Things begin to change when Sophie’s mom starts to date for the first time since she and her husband separated, and Sophie forges a friendship with her mom’s boyfriend’s son Francis.

[Evelyn B. Schwin · Rating 4 out of 5]

This YA novella was recommended by a current student. I rated it from a teenager’s perspective. Sad but realistic portrayal of how a death affects the family.

[Cece Harmon · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this when I was 12 or 13 so over a decade ago. I think this book is for a very small group if people. And that would be those who lost someone at a young age. Because the entire point of the book is how a young person handles life after something so life altering happens. I found this about a year pr so after the death of my mother. It understood what that was like for me.

[Stargazer · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good heartbreaking short story

[Lisa Jean · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read this book in a weekend. For a YA adult book the story line was adult and kept me wanting more. Great story for anyone dealing with grief.

[Josie M. · Rating 2 out of 5]

Um.. this book wasn't my favorite. I honestly couldn't crack the code of the story and wasn't able to understand the message or theme that this book was trying to present.
I understand that the was the author's debut novel, and you could tell. The author didn't do a very good job of conveying her thoughts throughout the story and I was confused by some of the statements in this book.
The author tried to make a deep emotion statement in this book and I think that she failed overall in this department. One of the concepts that the main character of this book presents is: time. The author explores the meaning of time and what it means in terms of events and measurements. I didn't get what the author was trying to present, as far as this message goes. In my opinion I think that the author tried to go too deep with the story, and as a result she lost me.
However, there were some things about the story that I did find interesting. I loved the main character and everything that she stood for; I was able to draw a lot of parallels between her and myself. I also was fascinated by the confused and absent father of the main character. I enjoyed his confusion and how he handled his emotions, I thought it brought up a good point. The relationship element in this book was interesting. I found the dynamic, situation and construct to be interesting. I also liked and appreciated how realistic and slow the relationship was taken in comparison to other relationships in YA literature. I also thought that the was that the author drew differences between the two sisters in this book helped bring out the reality of Sophie's, the main character in this book, relationship.
An then there is the death and leukemia element of the story. It didn't play an as big role in the story as I thought it was but you cold somewhat sense the presence of the story line throughout the entirety of the story.
Overall I thought this book was a blend of good and bad elements, but still interesting enough to keep my attention throughout. Although I couldn't decipher te overall meaning of this story I found some of the sub plots, which were quite plentiful, to be very entertaining.

[Jessica · Rating 3 out of 5]

another teen fiction book. this one is also not a super upper of a story. the main character's brother died of cancer when he was little, her father had an affair while he was dying and left her mother for the other woman, and in the present -- when the story begins -- the mom has begun dating someone else who has a son the main girl's age. who SHE kind of starts to date by the end of the book. overall, i liked the book and the story but there were a couple of things that i just thought were off. first of all, the boy seems a bit too wise for his age, if you know what i mean. he just didn't seem as realistic a character as he could have been. also, for some reason the book seemed as though it were set in the past for me, but it wasn't because it was published in 2010 (i think), and it talks about the internet. but for some reason, something about it just seemed older. i really don't know why. and then finally i felt like the book wrapped up a little quickly at the end. so, i don't know. i did like the book, but its not like i'm running out and telling everyone they have to read it because it was SO good...

[Aheem]

When I Was Older (167 pages) is a young adult realistic fiction novel by Garret Freymann-Weyr. The novel is centered on a teenager named Sophie who is struggling with coming to terms of her younger brother’s death years ago. She struggles with keeping his memory alive inside of her with everything that’s changing around her including her mother’s new boyfriend, her father’s affair, her new boyfriend and the idea of college. What I liked about this novel was how the author developed the character so well by describing her thoughts in many situations. At the end of the novel when Sophie discovers her father had taken his girlfriend to his son’s grave instead of taking Sophie and her sister, she is outraged. The author does a brilliant job of describing her feelings of betrayal. What I didn’t like about the novel was how the mood was constantly sad and gloomy. I understand that the novel was supposed to be about death, life and moving on, I wanted the mood to lighten from time to time. I didn’t enjoy this novel as much as the others I read because it was too much of a serious topic to read about for me.

[Huma · Rating 5 out of 5]

Good
This was really good, but it was really sad, and heartbreaking too.
I wish I have "on purpose" memories, but I can't do that, but Sophie can.
She's interesting, and what's really interesting about this book is that its made 70% of thoughts and memories, and only about 30% of action. Yet, its still captivating.
The way that Sophie thinks is really individual and unique even though its about stuff that happens to a lot of people, like losing your brother, having a stepdad, dating, etc.

Bad
Francis. He is generally a character I want to learn about, but he's just a little to unreal. I don't know why, but he's just strange.

[Melody · Rating 4 out of 5]

Focus or rigidity (depending on one's' point of view) from the inside. This book is about how a girl who has a live sister and a dead brother orders her days. Sophie is a very introspective girl, and being inside her head, with its rules and regulations, was a disconcerting experience for me. The growth that happens as all the members of her family move forward in time away from her brother's death, and the things time does to grief and memories are beautifully presented. I liked this book very much, and found it both believable and moving.

[Jessi · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love Freymann-Weyr's ability to bring characters and their relationships to life in such concise language - even if that means that her novels are shorter than I'd like them to be because I just want to keep reading! But Freymann-Weyr does a good job of packing a strong narrative punch into a small package. I love how the characters in this book work to gain empathy for each other. Sophie as a narrator was insightful and constant - almost too set in her ways and stubborn for me. A great read, but not usurping the special spot I have for My Heartbeat.

[eva steele-saccio · Rating 5 out of 5]

i loved this book, perhaps even more than my heartbeat, which was also fantastic. she is such a clever writer, somehow manages to weave a book of almost complete thought and very little actual narrative.

[Azalea · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was really good. I liked the characters, and some sentences really made me think. I thought Francis was somewhat unrealistic, as he was a little too articulate. Reminiscent of "My Heartbeat" although not quite as strong.

[michelle]

04/20/2007

[elissa · Rating 4 out of 5]

As soon as I finished MY HEARTBEAT, I ran right over to the library and got this one. I liked it almost as well.

[Tay Jackson · Rating 5 out of 5]

this book was pretty sad but it was really romantic!

[Caitlin · Rating 5 out of 5]

A total comfort read. It touched my heart at 13, still does today.

[Henna · Rating 4 out of 5]

"If I am what I love, there I go."

[Niah Hess · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a good book. It was kind of sad but things get better later on in the book.