Sean Thomas was single, thirty-seven, and just “a tiny bit desperate” to meet the woman of his dreams, when he was asked by a men’s magazine to try Internet dating. Millions of Women Are Waiting to Meet You tells the painfully funny story of what happened next. A gloriously indiscreet diary of the dates, good and bad, it tells of how Thomas was obliged to look at his past checkered love life and lays bare his answers to questions about his own sexual history, and male sexuality in general: Why are so many men fascinated by lesbians? What was so great about pantyhose? And what was it like to have sex with someone really famous? This book tells the story of many men, and maybe some women, too. It will appeal to any woman who wants to know what men really think about sex and romance, and to any man who has ever taken honest stock of his past and present relationships with the fairer sex.
This book depressed the fuck out of me. It depressed me as in I don't want to ever wake up because them I'm going to have to get out of this bed and deal with this awful world we live in.
It all starts harmlessly enough. The author is single. The author writes for Men's Health magazine. The author's boss tells him to write an article about internet dating. The author researches internet dating for the article by actually dating women he meets through dating websites.
The book is written in a sort of chatty, tell-all style. Each chapter relates not only to the author's current dating dilemma, but to the author's history of dating, love, and sex.
I thought the book was funny. I laughed out loud many times while reading it.
It's also easy to read. I tore through it in about twenty-four hours (including a slow work day).
But when I finished reading it, I wished I'd never picked it up.
The author wants the reader to think he's a nice guy. He wants the reader to wonder how a guy as nice as the author can be nearly 40 years old and still single. When he starts sharing his most private thoughts, the reader comes to understand why the author is almost 40 and still single. The author is almost 40 and still single because he is a cad. (Need a quick example of his dishonorable behavior? As he is contemplating dating a Chinese woman, he writes, "At least Asian girls will do the dishes." I suppose that was meant to be funny.)
The first hint of the author's boorish ways is his obsession with female beauty and body parts. He mentions the beauty of every woman he wants to meet. He mentions the breasts of nearly every woman he dates. He doesn't enjoy a particular date because the woman involved misses her homeland and is maudlin and teary throughout the evening. However, she has a great "arse," so the author thinks he really should see her again. The obsession with physicality gets a bit ridiculous when the author rejects a woman he seems to get along well with because she's only a few inches shorter than he is. Maybe you're alone, you idiot, I wanted to tell him, because you're too concerned with how women look.
He says he likes short, thin women. He likes to feel like he can protect them. (I wouldn't trust this guy to protect me from a mosquito.) Apparently, he likes to be with small women so he can feel big and strong. (He refers to his "caveman" brain way too much.) It turns out that no only does he like small women, he likes young women. When he was in his early 20s, he was sexually and romantically involved with a young woman who was only 17. Then, when he was thirty, he was sexually and romantically involved with another seventeen year-old woman child. (His math concerning this relationship was a little confusing. He claims he got together with this woman when she was 17, were together on and off for five years, and broke up when she was twenty.) Maybe he likes to be with young women because he's immature. Maybe he likes them so he can dominate them and push them around. I don't know. But maybe he ends up single because his girlfriends grow up and move on when they decide they want to try new things.
As we get deeper into the author's story, we learn he has been involved in not one, not two, but three unplanned pregnancies. Ummm, condoms? Keep it in your pants? But apparently not, because then he's involved in a paternity kerfuffle.
He frequents prostitutes, which I don't think is necessarily morally wrong, except he frequents prostitutes in developing countries where women have limited economic choices. Sex slavery...how enticing. What really pissed me off was the sentence where he refers to "the whore my American friend had in Kenya." The words "whore" and "had" make it all seem so ugly. If men are going to pay for sex, they should be respectful of the sex workers (even when the sex workers aren't around to hear what the men have to say). But I guess one of the reasons (some) men pay for sex is so they don't have to be respectful of the women they're fucking.
I thought the most interesting chapter in the book was the one dedicated to the author's foray into internet porn. I know little about internet porn. I didn't know people stream their live sex acts so other people can watch. I didn't realize people watch "normal" folks have sex. The author didn't know those things either. Of course, he spent so much time viewing internet porn that he ended up in the hospital. (No joke.)
So yeah. The author is a cad. But he's an honest cad, and he shares with the reader everything that goes on in that cad brain of his. And you know, I appreciate honesty. And I support the author's right to live his fucked up life the way that makes him happy. (Although he doesn't seem happy through most of this book.) I even support him writing a book about it all. I'm just sorry his book fell into my hands. And I'm sorry that it was funny and well-written enough to keep me reading it. Because if the book jacket is right and this is "a book that reveals what men really think about love, sex, and dating," a bunch of us ugly, fat, middle age (and older) woman are doomed to be alone. But after reading this book, I'm certain that being alone is preferable to being with this guy or someone of his ilk.
This was chosen as part of my book club read. (Thanks Sarah). It is rude, poorly written and very sexist. This man talks about his willy way too much and is such a sexist pig I hated him by the end of the book. In fact, I think i might just set the book on fire in my back hard.
With his book, Million of Women Are Waiting to Meet You, Sean Thomas pulls off a fairly astounding feat. He manages to make sex dull. His book, styled as a memoir of his internet dating experiences, is aptly summed up by his own description of hardcore pornograpy: "tedious, bleak, sad, and repetitive."
Sadly, though, this book lacks any of the arousal value or excitement even of pornography, let alone more elevated forms of erotica. Rarely has sex been portrayed as so mundane, boring and joyless. So while there's a lot of sex, it has all the sizzle of a laundry list. The humor is puerile, and I would expect that those who found it funny regard fart jokes as the highest form of humor.
Although the book is supposed to be something of a diary of Thomas' computer dating experiences, it's really more like a blow by blow recounting of his sex life, starting with his very first adolescent orgasm, with the computer dates scattered throughout this dreary tale like so many dried up raisins studding a messy cinnamon bun. The book is predictable and trite. Shamefully, Thomas even recycles or steals the joke from A Chorus Line about a boy having his first ejaculation who thinks it means he's got VD. I mean, really, how low can you get?
If you want to read a better written and more entertaining book about internet dating, you might try The Curse of the Singles Table, which does it a lot better than Thomas' book.
The cover piqued my interest in a little tabletop sale, but the book was so bad that I had to create a new Goodreads tag- 'bloody awful'.
This book, at best, is sexist and highly inappropriate, at worst, he has detailed multiple sexual assaults/harassment and sees no issue with them.
Also tw- it's fatphobic, ableist and includes multiple instances of fetishisation towards women of colour.
The man seems to be fixated upon young girls from his childhood, and doesn't think this might be problematic how he projects this image of a five year old onto other petite 'girls' that he tends to pursue. He constantly names women girls, this only compounds the way he infantilises women.
~He refers to a nine year old as "an appalling slut".
~Recalls a time he shoved his hand up a young teen girls skirt under the school table, and finds it amusing to express how he thinks of that often, and is "reliving it now".
~"On the internet... you can see as many naked teenies as you like"
"She's looking up at me like an orphan child... Vulnerable but mischievous".
I suggest you avoid like the plague, and I think I might just recycle this copy because I don't think anyone deserves to have this inflicted upon them.
I picked this up on a whim, and thankfully didn't pay much for it. It pains me to think that Sean Thomas may have earned any amount of money for writing this.
Where do I start with the faults this book has? The author is frankly one of the least engaging and endearing writers I've ever come across. he has such a superior attitude and tone that he was immediatley unlikeable.
That's before you get to his comments and observations about the women he dates. He judges quickly and harshly, he generalises and basically shows how he's remained single for so long.
Aside from his personality and comments, a lot of the timelines simply don't add up. The details of his sexual life was far from titillating or even interesting.
Really, stay away from this book, it was an interesting premise badly executed.
A British guy writes about his online dating experiences for a UK men's magazine. There's something weird about the guy -- I kept wondering if it was more okay for Brits to brag about visiting prostitutes and liking women's "bottoms."
His problem is he's just not very likable -- or funny, which can make up for a lack of likability. You really don't care much whether he succeeds or not. But he's smart enough to start off the book with a chapter about him asking a woman to marry him, so you keep reading to find out how he did succeed.
I guess if you'd never gone on an Internet date (is there anyone left?) this might be interesting. Or if you've never had sex with a Thai prostitute...and want to.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
I looked forward to this book arriving in the post, being, we are told, about the experience of a bloke trying to find love via dating sites. What a disappointment - there were very few internet dates described. Instead, the author lumbered on about his sex life from day one, so it was mainly filth, not at all amusing or informative. And it was not in the least "hilarious", as described on the cover - it was depressing.
Thomas starts online dating as a magazine assignment. Like many of us, he wonders how you can find love online, and what losers these love seekers must be if they can't do it in the real world. He is amazed at the number and range of online dating sites out there. With every date he goes on we get a little glimpse of Sean before, young Sean, Sean in love, Sean with sex mojo and Sean with no mojo. BongoWoman reminds him of Elizabeth in elementary school and Sally Ann and adolescent love in the back of Geography class. An encounter with IrishLass sends him reminiscing about Amelie. Online dating and the hours spent on the computer lead to a foray into online porn, but a trip to the hospital after too much self love gets him back on track. Millions of women allowed me a peek into the world of men and let me see that although they are very different from women, they are also not so different at all. Parts of this book had me cringing a little , parts and me laughing out loud.
I bought this on a whim from a charity shop, expecting it to be a light and funny exploration of a man's experiences with online dating. This was what it started off being - the first few chapters were insightful and witty and nice, and basically as good as I hoped and expected.
Later chapters were a bit different, however, as the author chose to go much more deeply into his own past with regards his romantic and sexual history, and frankly discuss a lot of fairly seldom admitted-to subjects. I thought a lot of this was very interesting, intelligent and honest, and imagine a lot of other men (in particular) will find a lot of common ground and get a lot of insight and pleasure from it. Sometimes it wasn't easy, and sometimes I felt it moved so far away from the initial subject that it became slightly uncomfortable to be being confessed to in such a manner, but in truth it did bring everything together towards the end without it feeling contrived or forced.
i didn't find the sexual content of the book to be as shocking as others seem to have. in fact, i was rather incredulous at the fact that a 37 year old man had never searched for internet porn- this book came out in, what, 2007? so it must have been written in 2004, 2005- nope, still not so early in the days of the internet that porn wasn't ubiquitous. after revealing all the other details of his sex life, i find it odd that the author would be coy about internet porn. yes, this little inauthentic detail bugged me a lot. XD
actually the whole book has an "early 2000s" vibe to it- with free dating sites available like okcupid and craigslist, paid sites seem a little antiquated, and no one (at least in my social group) bats an eye at internet dating anymore.
An extremely funny account on love, sex and internet dating. Sean Thomas, a freelance writer, finds himself in unknown territory after being assigned to try internet dating by the editor of the men's magazine he works for. Dealing with the choice of millions of dating websites, "profiles" and online names, emoticons, messages, and actual real dates, Thomas is blunt, honest and like many, simply confused yet fascinated by the vast variety of what lies out there in the web of romance and women. The question is however, after the many disappointing dates, and a brief addiction to net porn, can Sean Thomas really find love on the web? A memoir - funny, honest, poignant. A definite must-read.
This book is a funny, yet exceptionally crass memoir of one man's experience with dating. He's so vulgar that the only thing that redeemed him to me was his obvious fondness for short women. (Naturally, this preference shows good taste.) The in-your-face carnal descriptions, combined with the crude language almost made me put the book down. (And the Britishisms make it even worse. "Snogging" and "Shagging" sound like things you have to wear a hard hat and have a union card to do. Not to mention that the "c" word is even less palatable than the f-bomb). I did finish it, and enjoy it, because when he was funny, he made me laugh out loud.
funny in the beginning, depressing when contemplating the overarching meaning of it all. sean thomas is a funny guy with a lot of colorful relationship experiences to write about, and the first encounters in online dating are pretty spot on. however, he has an annoying habit of getting ADHD and rambling on about his personal life and not sticking to the storyline, which could have worked if he incorporated these anecdotes more seamlessly other than "oh, i see this and it reminded me of this". a friend had recommended this as a good book to read post-break up but i found this more to be a "this is why i have no faith in men" type read, which is really not my type of thing, sorry sean.
This book is about one man and his story of what happened when he tried internet dating for a year. While he tells you of all the women that he met and how their dates went he intersperses stories of his dating/sexual history into the chapters. Interesting read but I was a little turned off with how promiscuous this guy was. This book is definitely a "tell-all" and I do mean ALL! Also, the author tries to be a bit too literary with his ten dollar words and metaphors that probably float over most people's head (including mine). I wouldn't recommend it but I wouldn't tell someone not to read it either.
Me reí un montón con este libro, y cuando empecé a leerlo creí que la iba a pasar faltal por los reviews que leí (en su mayoría mujeres), pero debo admitir que fue interesante descubrir de una forma tan explícita el pensamiento masculino.
Si eres una persona fácil de sorprender jamás te lo recomendaría, y debo de admitir que algunas partes fueron muy prosmicuas y totalmente fuera de lo que a mi me parece correcto, pero no me la pasé mal con él.
Si eres hombre, te vas a sentir muy identificado con gran parte del libro. Si eres mujer... bueno, aquí encontrarás muchas respuestas al ¿qué demonios piensan los hombres?
A funny book. A 37 year old journalist was assigned to do some online dating to write an article. He ended up also writing a book. I learned that the British are much more open about sex. This bloke tells his adventures/misadventures with online dating as well as his past girlfriends, sexual encounters, and such. It's a memoir, so it must be true. I can't imagine divulging that much information about my proclivities and experiences to the world ... It was FUN to read though!
I thought this book was just... Honest. It's described as hilarious, and while I did chuckle here and there, there were no laugh-out-loud moments that would classify it as anything more than amusing. It surprised me- just as much as it did him, apparently- that he was getting paid for all of it. The long-winded, pointless chatter about his search for a partner was every bit as frustrating as experiencing it all first-hand. So, for that, I thought it wasn't all that bad.
Amazingly entertaining and a perfect example of how not to live one's live by thinking with one's member! It was actually very refreshing to read a novel of this type by a non-American (who are, in my opinion, waaay to prudish!). I previously read The Bachelor Chronicles, which was a novel about 2 relationships and 3 dates?!? This book is a total about-face, filled with sex and adventure! It's crude, yes, but the crudeness works.
Moments of great writing, but this book had few suprises and it is a problem with a memoir when you find yourself not liking the writer's life choices. There were a couple of very revealing sections which impressed me with how honest the writer was being, and yet at the same time really confirmed my dislike for him. Also, it feels very out of date as it is dealing with internet dating as if it was a new and unusal thing.
This book is a really fun read, and provided some great tidbits for my research, but I did feel that too often he went off on stories unrelated to his online dating experiences. The stories were usually interesting, sexy, and/or amusing, but sometime I just wished he'd stay on track with his online dating adventures instead of spending half of a chapter talking about his old college girlfriend.
This book is not a best choice to read. though it is enjoyable and talks about new idea of dating (for me it is an idea OF having friends) but still it talks frankly about sexual relations the kind of writing I cannot accept. However, I like Sean Thomas's style and I'm looking forward to reading other books by him
Before this I read a non-fiction book about a gay tweaker; after this I read a book about the impending apocalypse. This was the book that depressed me. It is funny, and an quick & easy read, but his life just.... wow. His stories, while funny, just made me sad. I don't want to judge people, but I'm not sure this guy and I would have made any decisions in common.
It may not be good, but at least it's a readable account of the author's adventures into on-line (with a brief detour into porn addiction.) But while Thomas is obviously trying to pull off a lovable warts & all Hornby type of honesty, he really succeeds it revealing that he's more than a bit of a creep and douche. I mean, first date anal?
funny and entertaining. Might sound a bit malesovinist but girls! take it easy. You can do the same. and well, male does have emotions as well in some other way. I would like to have a man like him. A man with plenty of life experience... Anyway after reading I'm going to give internet dating a try.
I picked this up at the library because it looked funny. And it was. It was also crass, crude, and off-putting. It started out well and I got through about 20% before it became so nasty that I didn't want to continue. This is the sort of book that makes me want to stop dating, because I'm afraid that deep inside the nice guys I date lurks a Sean Thomas.
I get why this book has so many bad reviews. He is shallow, sexist and a bit of an idiot. But he knows it and he is honest about it. And I liked that. He is also self-ironic and somewhat funny, and even though he is being an idiot for most of the book, I was well entertained and enjoyed reading the book.