Dancing on Quicksand: A Gift of Friendship in the Age of Alzheimer's

by Marilyn Mitchell

Hired to create adventures for an elderly business luminary named David, who no longer drives but is still vibrant and tenacious, author Marilyn Mitchell soon discovers that David is in the early stages of dementia. The stories from their years together are humorous, heartbreaking, exasperating, and joyous. No sentimental tale of hopeless tragedy, "Dancing on Quicksand" is a spirited, often rollicking memoir that builds around the themes of adventure, the evolution of a sustaining friendship, and the life-lessons Mitchell learns from a man who is losing his brilliant mind. "Dancing on Quicksand" unveils the universal nature of truth and respect while demonstrating that even in troubled times there are abundant opportunities for laughter and for understanding the essence of being human. Although "Dancing on Quicksand" is not an instructional guide for supporting those who have dementia, a cache of practical advice can be gleaned from its pages--innovative ideas about how to cope with what can be described fairly as an epidemic.

189 pages, Paperback

First published June 30, 2002

Reviews

[Valerie R · Rating 5 out of 5]

Poignant story of a tremendous friendship. Makes me wish I had been able to meet them! So much to learn about caring for a person with dementia by meeting him where where he is. That condition must be terrifying, and the need for comfort constant. What a treasure Marilyn and David's story is!!!

[Melanie · Rating 3 out of 5]

A heartwarming story of a caregiver's long friendship with her client who struggles with dementia and her efforts to meet his needs. I like the idea that while death is inevitable, so is life. We need to attend to one another as living vs. dying in day to day interactions. There is also a thoughtful discussion of what counts as "dignity" as we age. I left the book with unanswered questions and a sense that a lot of the story was untold. Despite this, I found the book to include useful ideas about living with a loved one with dementia (likely Alzheimer's).

[Margaret · Rating 3 out of 5]

what begins as a temporary job caring for elderly David turns into years of caring, love and trust. It would be great if everyone who is sliding into dementia could have a friend like Marilyn.

[Kathy Cramer · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting.