Silent Bob Speaks: The Collected Writings of Kevin Smith

by Kevin Smith

A collection of hilarious, over-the-top essays by the independent film circuit's most famous director includes the very best of his columns from Arena magazine on the topics that are nearest and dearest to his heart. Original.

Genres: Nonfiction, Humor, Biography, Memoir, Comedy, Essays, Autobiography

325 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2005

About the author

Kevin Patrick Smith is an American screenwriter, director, as well as a comic book writer, author, and actor. He is also the co-founder, with Scott Mosier, of View Askew Productions and owner of Jay and Silent Bob's Secret Stash comic and novelty store in Red Bank, New Jersey. He also hosts a weekly podcast with Scott Mosier known as SModcast. He is also known for participating in long, humorous Q&A Sessions that are often filmed for DVD release, beginning with An Evening with Kevin Smith.

His films are often set in his home state of New Jersey, and while not strictly sequential, they do frequently feature crossover plot elements, character references, and a shared canon in what is known by fans as the "View Askewniverse", named after his production company View Askew Productions. He has produced numerous films and television projects, including Clerks, Mallrats, Chasing Amy, Dogma, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back and Clerks II.

Reviews

[Debbie · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a collection of articles Kevin Smith wrote for magazines. Interesting enough. I for some reason found myself somewhat psychoanalyzing him from what he wrote. He seems to have a pretty poor self image. I mean, I could easily believe that the self depracating humor he throws in is just an act, but when you combine that with the number of times he brags about having sex with his apparently extra hot wife it's pretty indicative of a hell of an inferiority complex. Maybe it comes a bit from the fact that his feedback is almost always to the extreme. It makes sense, who wants to send a letter or email to a director that they feel lukewarm about? But the fact that he either hears from people practically worshipping his work or tearing it apart in the most creative ways they can imagine (which probably still winds up being rather pedantic) makes for a tenuous hold on his self esteem.

[Dustin · Rating 5 out of 5]

I admit it: I love almost everything 'Kevin Smith.' While I have loved all of his movies, I actually prefer his writing (non-screenplay) to the movies. In the movies, you have someone else doing their best to give life to his words, but in writing, as on stage with the 'Evening Wasted with Kevin Smith' DVDs, it's straight from the man himself. Always brutally honest and humble, you get to the end of one of his books, and feel like you are already good friends with him, and have been for a long time. He pours so much of himself, self-deprecating humor and all, into every story and diatribe, you end up feeling like you went to high school with him, otherwise how could you know so much about him.

I was most impressed by his upfront attitude regarding the big issues in his life: marriage, fatherhood, weight management, discovering and falling in love with New Jersey. While the funny stories and behind the scenes essays are always interesting and fun to read, its his approach to the big things in life that consistently leave my jaw dropped, that anyone could be *that* earnest and have managed to be successful in life absolutely floors me.

While I gave this five stars, I would say that his next book, "My Boring Assed Life" deserves 5 1/2 stars. It's just that good.

[Vivek EVHS Menon · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kevin Smith is an amazing writer. The way he speaks his mind on certain topics is fascinating and intriguing. While including the Kevin Smith trademark of profanity and vulgarity, he explains how he was lucky enough to enter the film industry and his adventures while working on "Jersey Girl." Readers can see the true nature of Smith as he expresses his humbleness and fondness for most of the people he works with. I highly recommend this book for mature audiences. Read with caution- you might be offended.

[RedHeadedSC · Rating 3 out of 5]

It’s fine, but it’s a little too immature compared to some of his other writings at times. Pretty neat time capsule for a certain period of his life though!

[Lottie · Rating 3 out of 5]

This did not age well. Lol.
Written in 2005 and most of it is during Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back and Jersey Girl.
Reading Kevin Smith's book "Silent Bob Speaks" from 2005. Things that have not aged well:
Thanking Harvey Weinstein in the introduction.
Talking about how Charlie Sheen cleaned up his act and "not everyone can be a ticking time bomb forever. Soon or later, we all grow up"... This is pre- tiger blood incident. Lol.
Affleck commenting how the Daredevil costume is better than the Batsuit (not really cringe worthy, but funny knowing who plays Batman in the future).
And saying "Jersey Girl is, hands down, the best movie we've ever made."
Lollollollollol.
It get 3 cause it was entertaining as a fan.

[Lana · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was alright. It is crass but it is funny.

A fair bit of the interest for me was only a result that it is so old. For example, this is during the Ben Affleck & Jennifer Lopez love affair and we all know how that turned out… There are also references to Weinstein (who Financed many of Kevin Smiths films). I think there was even reference to Weinstein discouraging Smith from hiring an actress Smith liked for a role . So there is that. (although maybe that was Bill Weinstein; but still telling).

I received this book as part of a “blind date with a book” that took place at book club.

[Doug Brunell · Rating 4 out of 5]

Smith can tell a funny story. I say as someone who started out as a big fan of Smith's movies, though that love of his films seemed to wane a bit with every project he did. I still think "Clerks 2" is brilliant, and I still like hearing the guy's adventures in the land of movie and comic making.

This book begins with the making of "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" and ends with "Jersey Girl" with a whole lot in between. There is also a really dated interview with Ben Affleck and a surprising one with Tom Cruise, too. The bottom line is, if you like Smith, you'll like this book. If you hate him you have no reason to read it.

[Timothy Rooney · Rating 4 out of 5]

Kevin Smith is a clever, funny guy--in both his writing books and movies. To begin with, I'm a fan of Kevin Smith movies. Because of this, I acknowledge a prejudice in reading his book. And as one more caveat to this review, the book only really deserves 3.5 stars, but I rounded up to a 4 star book.

To begin with, the book is just a collection of articles Kevin has written over time. And it does focus heavily on the production of one of Kevin's movies. What makes this a little less entertaining now is that the movie is currently at least 20 years old. The details in the book are still funny, but it is not up-to-date for things going on now. To Kevin's credit, his style of humor and subject matter can be funny across time.

His style is generally rather dry. Since I enjoy this type of writing, I appreciated the book. One of the disadvantages, though, of this style is that it does not create a strong impetus to read more and more. That's why it took me so long to get through this book!

Since the essays are not necessarily connected throughout the book, it might be a nice book to have at the ready when you need to chuckle for a 5-minute read and then put down until the next time you're looking for a light, humorous anecdote.

[Jack · Rating 4 out of 5]

A really fun and topical time capsule to the early 2000s. Love hearing about the casting for J&SBSB and all the celeb interactions. Interesting meditation on the inauthenticity he detected with Britney Spears. Smith could use a strong editorial hand to remove all of his “which” and distracting undercutting of himself. His “Morbidly Obese” entries are a grim look into how long he’s struggled with weight and his appearance. Tom Cruise interview is wild: Kev completely buys into the charm and fame and lets Cruise spew his Scientology and anti-medication rhetoric. The falling in love with a stripper story was very transparent and honest but also kind of great as a short story/missed connection thing with the ambiguous ending. Lots of politically incorrect things in here with modern eyes. The optimism for Jersey Girl is kind of heartbreaking. I completely see why the British magazine didn’t publish his raunchy fantasy comic con piece at the end.

[Cameron Johnson · Rating 4 out of 5]

I hope I can get Kevin to autograph this one day. This is a time capsule. This was a fun and fast read. I recommend this. Now for a little more detail.

Reading this, fifteen years after it was published, was a treat. A little cringe, a little groan, but mostly hilarious. It is a candid reflection of someone who doesn't know how time will tell for him and his topics.

I want to read his more up to date published works so I can see how he feels about those things now. Did he and Reese make up? Does he care since her career took a nosedive? How much did he freak out when Affleck told him he would be Batman? How did he flip out when he knew Harley was going to be in a Tarantino movie? Did he and that stripper reconcile?

I could probably look this stuff up, but I would rather read one of his books again. Kevin is someone I wish I had grown up with. Affleck has a good friend.

[Jack Comsa · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a collection of essays, the context shifts but the work is steadfast. Smith is never toothless, eternally deprecating, and always authentic.

Revealing to look back at certain points in his career, and what dominos would fall in their wake. Jay and Silent Bob is now more beloved than he gave the project credit for, but for what he called “his best flick yet,” Jersey Girl was a massive bomb, both commercially and critically. All of these moments- his friendship with Affleck, his inability to become commercial on a massive scale, him moving from Jersey- all inform the man today. A good man, a funny man, a talented writer, and a unique figure in the culture.

The highlights are the preproduction of Jay and Silent Bob, the pieces on his wife, interviews with Cruise and Affleck, and his extremely naughty-yet-hilarious satire of comic con. Strong work from a strong writing voice.

[Jess · Rating 3 out of 5]

Ive been a fan of Kevins since I can remember. Ive been to the stash, met Walt, seen comicon panels (in person)- the whole gamut (except pay to meet him because no). I even used to visit the view askewniverse. So, I was always destined to read this collection of his writing from the 90s and early oughts. It was good. I laughed. Sometimes I skimmed because there is only so much Affleck fanfic a girl can read before she gets uncomfortable. But mostly I just enjoyed my favourite fan boy in the world - even if I think he was wrong about Tobey Mcguires spiderman (cmon kev....it really did suck. It's ok. You can admit it now).

[David · Rating 3 out of 5]

While the book is easy to read and accessible there's not a lot of depth to it. a series of meet and greets for potential actors, lots of name dropping and KS throws lots of bones to the people he likes and dishes on those he doesn't. I think the self-deprecation is a front to show he's not prententious, that he's just a fat guy from Jersey but I get the feeling he's as egotistical as say Mel Gibson. And though i haven't seen all of his movies, i think he's victim of his early success with Clerks and nothing he's done since is half as good.
d

[Rumi Bossche · Rating 4 out of 5]

Silent Bob speaks !

Found this at the thrift shop and it was a nice find, it collects most of Smiths writings from varies columns and articles, and reads like a charm. Kevin Smith has to be one of the coolest dudes in Hollywood and man i dig his writing,  this collection ranges from stories from his movies,  interviews,  him in a stripclub and how he started collecting comics, him gusshing over Ben Affleck and Tom Cruise and all in a bizarre readable style, i already loved the guy for his movies and podcasts and stuff,  guess i love him even more now.

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
Great fun read !

[Melissa · Rating 3 out of 5]

Published in 2005 (but containing articles from as early as 2001 and the late nineties), this book has aged like milk. Lots of Weinstein praise, outdated language, and the sex talk like that of a teenage boy.
If you don't like Kevin Smith I'm not sure why you'd read this, but if you do then you might enjoy it. I haven't read his other books yet, but hoping they'll be better as they are more recent, and I do find his podcasts and other work interesting.
On a positive note, I really liked reading about the casting process and other film making experiences.

[Brad McKenna · Rating 3 out of 5]

I do enjoy his movies and expect nothing from them other than what they are; a bunch of fart and dick jokes surrounding references to comics and movies. This book dished some dirt on those actors he's worked with and the movies he's made. But his humor works better for me in the movies and does get a bit old after a while. Which does track with my first sentence, a movie lasts for a much shorter time than a book.

[The Rudie Librarian (Brian) · Rating 3 out of 5]

To be honest I was a bit disappointed in this book. Although Smith is known for his foul mouth and inappropriate sense of humor, he also is an intelligent and kind-hearted person. You don’t see the positive qualities he possesses as much in his writing. It instead showcases all of his sophomoric side. There were a few shining moments, but overall this was not my favorite read.

[Corey · Rating 3 out of 5]

A collection of articles from Kevin Smith. Covers production stories from Jersey Girl. There's a fake "Comic-Con" article that was never published for a British magazine. The interviews with Tom Cruise and Ben Affleck are surprisingly good.

The self-deprecation on some of the articles gets old, but if you like Kevin Smith its a solid read.

[Emily · Rating 3 out of 5]

"... I can't remember who said what to whom first and I mark that as one of life's great ironies: so often, the details of what shapes us most in life are forgotten over the course of our day-to-days. If we knew how important a moment was going to be to us one day, I imagine we'd record it or preserve it better..."

[Dean · Rating 5 out of 5]

No one can paint a picture with words quite like Kevin Smith. Granted, that picture is usually lewd, but it is also uncompromising and in your face. He grabs your attention from the very beginning and doesn’t let go until you turn the final page.

[Bonnie Ustaszewski · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was entertaining, although the humor was a bit juvenile at times. It was quite a lighthearted read and I enjoyed the glimpses behind the scenes on making movies, plus all the little tidbits of Kevin Smith's life.

[William Retherford · Rating 5 out of 5]

A fun read detailing the daily life of a very comedic Hollywood writer.

[Chloë · Rating 2 out of 5]

I’ve always enjoyed Smiths humour but this book has aged so badly

[Chris Simerly · Rating 4 out of 5]

I’ve always been a Kevin Smith fan and this was the second time reading this book! The diary about going to San Diego’s Comic Con is worth the read! Haha!

[Alexander C. Bailey · Rating 3 out of 5]

An entertaining collection of old articles Smith wrote. Would recommend for fans of Kevin Smith

[Lincoln · Rating 3 out of 5]

lotta funny shit in here
i still haven’t seen it, but much of this book is spent praising the shit out of Jersey Girl, sucks to see that he switched up so hard on it after release

[kate · Rating 3 out of 5]

A very funny and quick behind the scenes of my favourite director. Smith's writing really is hilarious both on screen and on paper

[Katie]

I enjoy Kevin Smith a lot!!!!!! A few poorly aged opinions in this however

[E.Y.E.-D · Rating 3 out of 5]

I enjoyed parts of this book but, I really feel like I got around to reading it entirely too late. If had I read it when it came out I probably would have enjoyed it a lot more.

[Luke · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is funny for sure, but what makes it even better is it's an unintentionally hilarious look into certain moments in entertainment history from a totally different perspective. It's truly a sign of the times. Specifically, this concerns the movies "Daredevil" and "Jersey Girl", and the infamous relationship Bennifer. All of these things Kevin Smith pegged as being big, milestone successes, but history would prove that wrong. Now there's obviously no way he knew at the time these things would take the turns they did, but knowing what we do now, it's just funny seeing what perception used to be.

"Daredevil" was a big one for me. An entire chapter is dedicated to interviewing Ben Affleck, and the guy praises how amazing this movie is. Collectively, Affleck and Smith wax poetic about how it capitalizes on the success of "Spider-Man", gives Affleck the superhero role he dreamed of, and how it's poised to be the next big thing. This all made sense back in 2003 before the movie came out. 13 years later, "Daredevil" is widely viewed as a massive misfire that both severely damaged Affleck's credibility with fans and the character he tried to play. It wasn't until Charlie Cox appeared on Netflix in 2015 that people felt Matt Murdoch got his due.

That same chapter focused heavily on Bennifer, the infamous relationship between Affleck and Jennifer Lopez. It talked all about how in love they were, how perfect they were together, and how this was the life Affleck always wanted. Love right? They ended in 2004.

Lastly, "Jersey Girl". Three chapters were dedicated to the creation of this movie. I personally never saw it, but after history presented "Daredevil" and Bennifer way differently than Smith intended, I had to look up how "Jersey Girl" did. It got very mixed reviews and barely made its budget back in the Box Office. Obviously this was a passion project for Smith, but it's funny to see how different opinions can be when you're both directly involved with something and you have nothing by hype around you.

Please don't misunderstand. I love Smith's work and have visited his Red Bank store several times. He's right up my ally. Yet while this book is very well written and at times very funny, it's even better as a time capsule from someone in the industry and what people thought in the early 2000s.