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The Zombie-Wilson Diaries
It should have been the perfect vacation. A beautiful island without a soul in sight. Blue sea so clear I can see the reef. Palm trees swaying in the wind, and a girl with barely a scrap of clothing on. There is only one problem. She is a zombie and she wants to eat me. That's right. My only companion is a creature with a hunger for human flesh. I should bash in her brains and toss her in the ocean but I don't have a volleyball to talk to. All I have is this diary and my own Zombie-Wilson.
240 pages, Paperback
First published February 5, 2010
9 people are currently reading
449 people want to read
About the author
Timothy W. Long
62 books152 followersWhen not sitting around watching Rick and Morty reruns in a bathrobe, Timothy W. Long writes stuff. He has a predilection for weird literature and sometimes drinks Coke for breakfast. Don't tell his mom.
Tim is the author of over 30 novels in genres ranging from cozy/Isekai, to all manner of post-apocalyptic because no one has managed to take away his word processor.
Tim is an active member of SFWA, HWA, and Thriller Writers. He recently signed a three-book deal with Aethon Books for his Dark Lord Reborn Series.
Tim is the author of over 30 novels in genres ranging from cozy/Isekai, to all manner of post-apocalyptic because no one has managed to take away his word processor.
Tim is an active member of SFWA, HWA, and Thriller Writers. He recently signed a three-book deal with Aethon Books for his Dark Lord Reborn Series.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 66 reviews
November 5, 2010
The Zombie Wilson Diaries plays on the castaway scenario replacing the volleyball named Wilson from the Tom Hanks film with a zombie girl who is quite a bit more animated and a whole lot more bitey than a ball with a bloody hand print for a face. Our nameless narrator begins his diary while on a business trip to the islands, which turns into a plane crash which lands him on a deserted island in the middle of the ocean with one of the other passengers, who apparently floated up to the island alive, just like him, but made the unfortunate decision to eat some exotic berries that have turned her from a hottie model type into a rottie gooey type. But fear not, our narrator decides to take her under his wing instead of bashing her skull in with a big rock because she keeps him company on a island lacking in others to socially interact with. Oh, we do get the occasional interloper, like our fair lady's dead rotting hubby and a few natives who have canoed over from another island, but for the most part, this tale of a fateful trip is all about a man and his zombie.
A nice touch with this book is the appearance of handwritten text and the hand scrawled stick drawings that the narrator puts at the front of each chapter, which added to the personal diary feel of this story.
It is an intriguing relationship that this deluded and desperate man has with a creature that I found hard to define as far as what her role was. Each chapter starts with "My girlfriend..." but it becomes clear that the zombie in this story plays multiple parts, and girlfriend, it seems, is probably the least of them. Desperate for companionship, it is almost as if she is his pet or willful child, as he takes care of her and keeps her from getting into trouble, while at the same time she snaps at him and generally acts like a brat, but there are moments when it seems that his girl, undead Friday, seems to recognize and even relies on him, especially when there are thunderstorms and undead sharks trying to snap her in half.
The comedy here is dark and should be appreciated by a fan of the zombie genre for certain, as well as those who like a bit of a twisted tale in general. The self-induced torture that this castaway goes through as he debates, on a daily basis, whether it would just be better to kill this creature even though she provides him with a shred of human contact, is a wickedly humorous conflict. I'm not really sure whether I liked this guy or I just wanted to smack some sense into him, but I know one thing for sure, this book was an entertaining journey into the surreal.
A nice touch with this book is the appearance of handwritten text and the hand scrawled stick drawings that the narrator puts at the front of each chapter, which added to the personal diary feel of this story.
It is an intriguing relationship that this deluded and desperate man has with a creature that I found hard to define as far as what her role was. Each chapter starts with "My girlfriend..." but it becomes clear that the zombie in this story plays multiple parts, and girlfriend, it seems, is probably the least of them. Desperate for companionship, it is almost as if she is his pet or willful child, as he takes care of her and keeps her from getting into trouble, while at the same time she snaps at him and generally acts like a brat, but there are moments when it seems that his girl, undead Friday, seems to recognize and even relies on him, especially when there are thunderstorms and undead sharks trying to snap her in half.
The comedy here is dark and should be appreciated by a fan of the zombie genre for certain, as well as those who like a bit of a twisted tale in general. The self-induced torture that this castaway goes through as he debates, on a daily basis, whether it would just be better to kill this creature even though she provides him with a shred of human contact, is a wickedly humorous conflict. I'm not really sure whether I liked this guy or I just wanted to smack some sense into him, but I know one thing for sure, this book was an entertaining journey into the surreal.
May 24, 2012
This book was really, REALLY terrible. I thought it might be interesting, funny even, a guy stuck on an island with a zombie. But the humor was ill place, the character unlikable and the whole book just gross.
The narrator (who, I don't believe we're ever told his name) crashes to a deserted island and compares his life to that of Tom Hanks in Castaway. He finds another survivor, only she's eaten some strange berries and turned herself into a Zombie.
All this I could handle. But this guy, who is in probably his late 20s to early 30s, can do nothing but ogle the zombie woman, make crude jokes and take about sex, how hungry his is, or how he's going to probably kill her. The jokes made are just not funny; they're inappropriate at best and bordering on necrophilia at worst. Maybe it's just me, but if I got stuck on a desert island, I'd be more worried about my survival than if I could bang a zombie chick.
Also, there were parts of it that downright made my stomach turn. I'm ok with some gory stuff but this... was just gross (and I've read Scott Sigler. I don't squick easy.) On top of that, they were completely unnecessary. They didn't add anything to the story; they were just in there to be gross.
Despite all of this, despite the terrible features of this book, I kept reading. Why? Because I wanted to see how he was rescued. And then you know what? HE DIDN'T EVEN GET RESCUED! All of that and he ends up on a DIFFERENT deserted island with now TWO zombie chicks (because wouldn't you know, he always kills the men but keeps the women zombies) and no sign of a rescue.
What a collossal waste of my time. Don't pick it up. Don't read it. Don't be fooled by the fact that just because it's a zombie book it might be good. It's not.
The narrator (who, I don't believe we're ever told his name) crashes to a deserted island and compares his life to that of Tom Hanks in Castaway. He finds another survivor, only she's eaten some strange berries and turned herself into a Zombie.
All this I could handle. But this guy, who is in probably his late 20s to early 30s, can do nothing but ogle the zombie woman, make crude jokes and take about sex, how hungry his is, or how he's going to probably kill her. The jokes made are just not funny; they're inappropriate at best and bordering on necrophilia at worst. Maybe it's just me, but if I got stuck on a desert island, I'd be more worried about my survival than if I could bang a zombie chick.
Also, there were parts of it that downright made my stomach turn. I'm ok with some gory stuff but this... was just gross (and I've read Scott Sigler. I don't squick easy.) On top of that, they were completely unnecessary. They didn't add anything to the story; they were just in there to be gross.
Despite all of this, despite the terrible features of this book, I kept reading. Why? Because I wanted to see how he was rescued. And then you know what? HE DIDN'T EVEN GET RESCUED! All of that and he ends up on a DIFFERENT deserted island with now TWO zombie chicks (because wouldn't you know, he always kills the men but keeps the women zombies) and no sign of a rescue.
What a collossal waste of my time. Don't pick it up. Don't read it. Don't be fooled by the fact that just because it's a zombie book it might be good. It's not.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
June 8, 2012
Ok, this was one of the worst books I've read in a long time. I still finished it however just because I can't leave a book unfinished.
The stranded guy is a moron. And his zombie is perhaps the worst zombie I've ever come across in zombie lore. She shouldn't have been showing fear or comfort or any of that. Zombie's are supposed to be emotionless. And why for the love of god would he bring her with when he left the island?
The stranded guy is a moron. And his zombie is perhaps the worst zombie I've ever come across in zombie lore. She shouldn't have been showing fear or comfort or any of that. Zombie's are supposed to be emotionless. And why for the love of god would he bring her with when he left the island?
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
March 16, 2010
I love small presses. Often times, much more so than some of the larger presses out there, the books that come out of them may not be polished or the type of thing that a normal publisher would look at twice, but there's so much heart and charm in them that it would be a tragedy if they didn't somehow find their ways into publication. Library of the Living Dead is one of those small presses, and one of its latest titles unleashed upon the public is Timothy Long's The Zombie Wilson Diaries.
Our narrator survives a plane crash only to wind up on a deserted island with only one companion. No, it isn't a volley-ball with a smiley face painted on it...His "Wilson" is a woman who just happens to be one of the reanimated dead. While one might think that bashing its brains in would be the logical course of action, our narrator can't bring himself to do it, so he winds up talking to the thing and it becomes, in a weird way, his best friend.
If you're looking for the next Faulkner, look elsewhere. If you're looking for a twisted bit of humor involving a guy trying not to be attracted to the walking corpse that wants to eat him, this is the book for you. With chapters titled "My Girlfriend Has Crabs" (eeeeewwwww) and "My Girlfriend Likes to be Tied Up," it's easy to see where the author is going, and it's a fun ride getting there. Every chapter is accompanied by a friendly little stick-figure that, for some reason, makes the whole thing that much funnier.
If this book were to suffer from any shortcoming, it would be that its rough. The grammar isn't great all the time, and there are a few mechanical errors in the book. But then again, we are reading a diary written by a character who is stranded on an island with a dead girl. Everything in the book works from the characters point of view, and if the reader just nods and goes with it, he'll find the book that much more enjoyable.
On the whole, I'd call this one a triumph. It's quirky, fast paced, and good to the last withered drop.
Our narrator survives a plane crash only to wind up on a deserted island with only one companion. No, it isn't a volley-ball with a smiley face painted on it...His "Wilson" is a woman who just happens to be one of the reanimated dead. While one might think that bashing its brains in would be the logical course of action, our narrator can't bring himself to do it, so he winds up talking to the thing and it becomes, in a weird way, his best friend.
If you're looking for the next Faulkner, look elsewhere. If you're looking for a twisted bit of humor involving a guy trying not to be attracted to the walking corpse that wants to eat him, this is the book for you. With chapters titled "My Girlfriend Has Crabs" (eeeeewwwww) and "My Girlfriend Likes to be Tied Up," it's easy to see where the author is going, and it's a fun ride getting there. Every chapter is accompanied by a friendly little stick-figure that, for some reason, makes the whole thing that much funnier.
If this book were to suffer from any shortcoming, it would be that its rough. The grammar isn't great all the time, and there are a few mechanical errors in the book. But then again, we are reading a diary written by a character who is stranded on an island with a dead girl. Everything in the book works from the characters point of view, and if the reader just nods and goes with it, he'll find the book that much more enjoyable.
On the whole, I'd call this one a triumph. It's quirky, fast paced, and good to the last withered drop.
unfinished
April 22, 2017Book 7 of the Ultimate Undead Collection: The Zombie Apocalypse Best Sellers Boxed Set. This one was so bad I couldn't finish it.
September 11, 2011
(Originally reviewed for buyzombie.com)
It’s a Sunday morning; I’ve got the sun peeking over the mountains, a cup of coffee and a little Maroon 5 to start me up. Last night after a band jam session, I finished Timothy W Long’s The Zombie Wilson Diaries. So, let’s get to a little disclosure. I’d heard about this book for a while on the Library of the Living Dead’s forum. I had zero interest in the story. I pre-judged and decided that I wouldn’t like it. Over the weeks, I built up a very unreasonable disdain for it. Then the honcho at BuyZombie.com said he wanted it reviewed. Please don’t pick me, I chanted. “Todd, review this.” Dammit!
The highest praise I believe a writer can garner is when he or she can convert somebody who begrudgingly reads their book…and enjoys it. That is the case with me and Mr. Long’s book, The Zombie Wilson Diaries. Folks, this is a run read. It is charming and entertaining and funny. If, like me, you can be a bit of a snob…get over yourself for a day and pick up this amusing twist in the genre.
Friends, trust me, I wanted to hat this story before I’d read the first page. Mr. Long thwarted me at every turn. I could not stop reading. I laughed, and those who read my reviews know how much I value a writer who can elicit actual LOLing.
Our protagonist is stranded on a deserted island. He encounters one of the fellow members of his ill-fated flight. Only, she has eaten a native plant, and now…well, yes, she’s a zombie. Kudos to Mister Long for not going too far with the protagonist-zombie relationship. It would’ve ruined a spectacularly enjoyable story. The relationship we are allowed to watch blossom never goes too far from reasonable. That is the simple beauty of this story.
I don’t fib to those of you who read my reviews. I don’t do fluff pieces. I tell you straight up if you should part with your hard-earned dough to indulge in a little zombie time. I can say very confidently, as it pertains to The Zombie Wilson Diaries, the answer is yes.
Now, true to form, I must point out a few problems. That is how we learn as writers. I felt that the forward pre-announcing spelling errors was more hurtful. It made me lay in wait for them (and they do in fact exist). We are champions of small press, glitches are part of our charm as long as they are not abundant. And to credit Mr. Long, they aren’t abundant, but they are there. Also, how did you score Ms. Frater as the writer to your forward? Next to Amelia Beamer, she’s my favorite scribe in the Z-genre…but I digress.
I happily recommend The Zombie Wilson Diaries. It is fast paced, fun, and even provides a few well-constructed gross-out moments. If you’ve convinced yourself you would hate it, like I had, then I challenge you to pick it up. Mr. Long will win you over with easy wit, a bit of charm, and a darn good story.
It’s a Sunday morning; I’ve got the sun peeking over the mountains, a cup of coffee and a little Maroon 5 to start me up. Last night after a band jam session, I finished Timothy W Long’s The Zombie Wilson Diaries. So, let’s get to a little disclosure. I’d heard about this book for a while on the Library of the Living Dead’s forum. I had zero interest in the story. I pre-judged and decided that I wouldn’t like it. Over the weeks, I built up a very unreasonable disdain for it. Then the honcho at BuyZombie.com said he wanted it reviewed. Please don’t pick me, I chanted. “Todd, review this.” Dammit!
The highest praise I believe a writer can garner is when he or she can convert somebody who begrudgingly reads their book…and enjoys it. That is the case with me and Mr. Long’s book, The Zombie Wilson Diaries. Folks, this is a run read. It is charming and entertaining and funny. If, like me, you can be a bit of a snob…get over yourself for a day and pick up this amusing twist in the genre.
Friends, trust me, I wanted to hat this story before I’d read the first page. Mr. Long thwarted me at every turn. I could not stop reading. I laughed, and those who read my reviews know how much I value a writer who can elicit actual LOLing.
Our protagonist is stranded on a deserted island. He encounters one of the fellow members of his ill-fated flight. Only, she has eaten a native plant, and now…well, yes, she’s a zombie. Kudos to Mister Long for not going too far with the protagonist-zombie relationship. It would’ve ruined a spectacularly enjoyable story. The relationship we are allowed to watch blossom never goes too far from reasonable. That is the simple beauty of this story.
I don’t fib to those of you who read my reviews. I don’t do fluff pieces. I tell you straight up if you should part with your hard-earned dough to indulge in a little zombie time. I can say very confidently, as it pertains to The Zombie Wilson Diaries, the answer is yes.
Now, true to form, I must point out a few problems. That is how we learn as writers. I felt that the forward pre-announcing spelling errors was more hurtful. It made me lay in wait for them (and they do in fact exist). We are champions of small press, glitches are part of our charm as long as they are not abundant. And to credit Mr. Long, they aren’t abundant, but they are there. Also, how did you score Ms. Frater as the writer to your forward? Next to Amelia Beamer, she’s my favorite scribe in the Z-genre…but I digress.
I happily recommend The Zombie Wilson Diaries. It is fast paced, fun, and even provides a few well-constructed gross-out moments. If you’ve convinced yourself you would hate it, like I had, then I challenge you to pick it up. Mr. Long will win you over with easy wit, a bit of charm, and a darn good story.
May 29, 2018
Written as a journal we have the main protagonist stranded on a tropical island. Awaiting rescue he hunts for food. Builds his house and generally just tries to survive. Oh, he also has a companion so things can't be bad can they? Well unfortunately the companion is zombie. She is a pretty girl, but dead all the same and all she wants to do is eat, namely him.
She'll moan and groan to get at his flesh, or anyone's flesh. Nothing is safe, not even a turtle. He could bash her brains in and bury her somewhere. However he's grown attached to this hula skirt, coconut bra wearing zombie.
The relationship that develops between the two is humorous and caring. He's cleaned her up, removing the insect eggs from her bad eye and groomed her to be more presentable for when the rescue arrives. Not forgetting she is his only companion. Without her he'll be very lonely.
The chapter titles themselves give every indication where the story is headed. E.g. my girlfriend likes to cuddle or my girlfriend doesn't like being left alone. The titles are in no way spoilers for the chapter ahead due to their occasional double meaning. Each chapter heading includes a somewhat amusing stickman sketch too.
Overall I'd say this is an excellent read, brilliantly written and everything just flows from the main characters point of view. I highly recommend The Zombie Wilson Diaries. It's funny, fast paced and gross. I can't think of anything better to read while lying on the beach.
"The Blue Lagoon with zombies"
She'll moan and groan to get at his flesh, or anyone's flesh. Nothing is safe, not even a turtle. He could bash her brains in and bury her somewhere. However he's grown attached to this hula skirt, coconut bra wearing zombie.
The relationship that develops between the two is humorous and caring. He's cleaned her up, removing the insect eggs from her bad eye and groomed her to be more presentable for when the rescue arrives. Not forgetting she is his only companion. Without her he'll be very lonely.
The chapter titles themselves give every indication where the story is headed. E.g. my girlfriend likes to cuddle or my girlfriend doesn't like being left alone. The titles are in no way spoilers for the chapter ahead due to their occasional double meaning. Each chapter heading includes a somewhat amusing stickman sketch too.
Overall I'd say this is an excellent read, brilliantly written and everything just flows from the main characters point of view. I highly recommend The Zombie Wilson Diaries. It's funny, fast paced and gross. I can't think of anything better to read while lying on the beach.
"The Blue Lagoon with zombies"
June 9, 2010
Sometimes funny and sometimes sad at what the guy had to go through. Trying to cope with being stranded on a desert island where your only companion is a zombie is actually MUCH funnier than you'd think it would be.
I guess when you're all alone you'll take your friends in any form. Very fast read. At times I thought he behaved much younger than he came off as. Unless I missed it, you're never given his age. I'd say it's somewhere between 8 and 30. Nice window.
At times it's gross (seriously, it has a zombie) and the mental pictures it gave me where pretty bad (again, it has a zombie)! At one point I thought the story was going to go into the grossly bizarre but it ended up being kinda gross, a little sad, an ounce of pathetic and little funny.
I guess when you're all alone you'll take your friends in any form. Very fast read. At times I thought he behaved much younger than he came off as. Unless I missed it, you're never given his age. I'd say it's somewhere between 8 and 30. Nice window.
At times it's gross (seriously, it has a zombie) and the mental pictures it gave me where pretty bad (again, it has a zombie)! At one point I thought the story was going to go into the grossly bizarre but it ended up being kinda gross, a little sad, an ounce of pathetic and little funny.
April 23, 2012
Trapped on a deserted island with only a rabid snarling zombie chick as company.
The diary entries document one man's slow descent into the absurd as he struggles to survive; faced with zombies, wild animals, wild animal zombies, and pissed-off islanders.
This book is a fun look at the worst desert island scenario ever imagined. The diary writer's constant snide remarks about his situation always serve to make the horrific into the comedic. Worth reading if you're a zombie fan looking for a good laugh.
The diary entries document one man's slow descent into the absurd as he struggles to survive; faced with zombies, wild animals, wild animal zombies, and pissed-off islanders.
This book is a fun look at the worst desert island scenario ever imagined. The diary writer's constant snide remarks about his situation always serve to make the horrific into the comedic. Worth reading if you're a zombie fan looking for a good laugh.
October 24, 2015
First of all, I'd like to say I HATE ZOMBIES. They are creepy and freak me out. However, when I read the synopsis for this book I just had to read it. And I'm really glad I did. It was HILARIOUS. I still don't like Zombies, but I was happy to read something about them that was a little humorous. It ends somewhat abruptly (since the guy ran out of pages in his diary) so you're left to wonder what happens next.
September 9, 2011
A disturbing story about one of the most ridiculous characters ever put into fiction. Ok, I laughed through my gaping mouth as I read the story of a man trapped on a mostly deserted island with a zombie woman he refused to kill. The story is written in journal form. Read along as the man tries to survive and escape the island as he fights his zombie girl, random animals, and himself.
July 31, 2012
Nothing special. Writing is not that sophisticated. Plot goes nowhere despite a few avenues of possibilities. It's a quick read that requires little thought. At times it did make me chuckle. Read this if you want something pretty mindless - but don't try to eat while you read. Some gross stuff that might turn your stomach, but nothing revolutionary.
October 13, 2013
I picked this up free for Kindle about a week ago. I read through this book nonstop. The main character is stranded on an island with a zombie girl. He becomes strangely attached and the resulting interactions between the two kept my interest all of the way through. It was funny and kinda sad at the same time. I would recommend this to just about anyone.
April 22, 2012
Dear reader. Do not read.
April 18, 2012
Totally a guilty pleasure.
June 13, 2012
Not sure what to say about this one. It was fun. I giggled often, laughed out loud a few times. But..uhm...really gross at times. And seriously...that's the ending?
September 2, 2012
Well, that was a wild ride! Completely bonkers, sick, gross and slightly disturbing- alright totally disturbing.
March 28, 2014
This book was hilarious. And just wrong on so many levels! Zombie sharks?! That got me thinking...
October 24, 2012
This was just so much fun. Gruesome, disgusting fun.
December 26, 2017
I enjoyed the book , both gruesome and hilarious. An excellent story, and a great parody. A breath of fresh air for those of us that enjoy dystopian horror....but need a break from the doom and gloom. I recommend this book to all readers, I love it.
July 19, 2018
I enjoyed the content of the story and the weirdness but the ending left a bad taste like a meal unfinished
September 18, 2010
Everyone, at some point in time has played the “Desert Island” game. You know the one. What one movie/tv/book show would you pick to take if you were stranded on a desert island? What one food/drink would you pick? Oh, I got one…what one person would you choose to be stranded with you on a desert island? Did any of you pick a hot female zombie? Well the protagonist of The Zombie-Wilson Diaries didn’t exactly PICK to be stranded on a desert island with a zombie of the opposite sex, but that’s just what happens and hilarity ensues!
The Zombie-Wilson Diaries is written in a journal style, the font is very handwritingesque and there are intentional spelling/grammatical errors to make it feel “real”. I, personally, love when this tactic is used for authenticity in journal style writing, as long as it’s not taken to the extreme. Seriously, you’re in the middle of a desert island with a zombie tied to a tree are you really going to worry about spelling and grammar in your entries?
What Tim Long has written is a zombedy (zombie comedy) that needs no summary. Suffice it to say that the author met and even exceeded every expectation I had. I will admit, I was worried that the running gag of a man stranded on an island with a zombie girlfriend would quickly get old and I would get bored. That did not happen, Long was able to come up with unique ways to keep the story moving forward. Can we say ZOMBIE SHARK?! Yes!
I truly only have one criticism of the book and that was the ending. I didn’t care for it, but maybe there is a sequel coming that I am unaware of that would make the ending work better for me. That’s not to say that I did not enjoy the book once it was done…I still loved it and I will read it again and recommend it to friends.
The Zombie-Wilson Diaries is written in a journal style, the font is very handwritingesque and there are intentional spelling/grammatical errors to make it feel “real”. I, personally, love when this tactic is used for authenticity in journal style writing, as long as it’s not taken to the extreme. Seriously, you’re in the middle of a desert island with a zombie tied to a tree are you really going to worry about spelling and grammar in your entries?
What Tim Long has written is a zombedy (zombie comedy) that needs no summary. Suffice it to say that the author met and even exceeded every expectation I had. I will admit, I was worried that the running gag of a man stranded on an island with a zombie girlfriend would quickly get old and I would get bored. That did not happen, Long was able to come up with unique ways to keep the story moving forward. Can we say ZOMBIE SHARK?! Yes!
I truly only have one criticism of the book and that was the ending. I didn’t care for it, but maybe there is a sequel coming that I am unaware of that would make the ending work better for me. That’s not to say that I did not enjoy the book once it was done…I still loved it and I will read it again and recommend it to friends.
May 9, 2013
Amazon's summary:
It should have been the perfect vacation. A beautiful island without a soul in sight. Blue sea so clear I can see the reef. Palm trees swaying in the wind, and a girl with barely a scrap of clothing on.
There is only one problem. She is a zombie and she wants to eat me.
That's right. My only companion is a creature with a hunger for human flesh. I should bash in her brains and toss her in the ocean but I don't have a volleyball to talk to.
All I have is this diary and my own Zombie-Wilson.
My thoughts:
I am a fan of the zombie genre, and a fan of the Tom Hanks movie Castaway so when I saw this book come up combining both I decided to give it a try. I'm glad I did. The book is written in funny sardonic journal entries in the protagonist's diary which sometimes made me go "EWWW" and other times chuckle. I wasn't sure whether I liked the narrator as at times he seems a bit selfish and self-centered but in some situations, it added to the believability of the story and made his choices more understandable.
I thought this was an interesting, fresh take on the zombie genre. If you want a quick,light read with a bit of gore thrown in for good measure, pick this little gem up. Right now it appears it is available for a free read if you have Amazon Prime for your Kindle.
For this and other reviews, please see my blog at http://geekybookgal.blogspot.com
It should have been the perfect vacation. A beautiful island without a soul in sight. Blue sea so clear I can see the reef. Palm trees swaying in the wind, and a girl with barely a scrap of clothing on.
There is only one problem. She is a zombie and she wants to eat me.
That's right. My only companion is a creature with a hunger for human flesh. I should bash in her brains and toss her in the ocean but I don't have a volleyball to talk to.
All I have is this diary and my own Zombie-Wilson.
My thoughts:
I am a fan of the zombie genre, and a fan of the Tom Hanks movie Castaway so when I saw this book come up combining both I decided to give it a try. I'm glad I did. The book is written in funny sardonic journal entries in the protagonist's diary which sometimes made me go "EWWW" and other times chuckle. I wasn't sure whether I liked the narrator as at times he seems a bit selfish and self-centered but in some situations, it added to the believability of the story and made his choices more understandable.
I thought this was an interesting, fresh take on the zombie genre. If you want a quick,light read with a bit of gore thrown in for good measure, pick this little gem up. Right now it appears it is available for a free read if you have Amazon Prime for your Kindle.
For this and other reviews, please see my blog at http://geekybookgal.blogspot.com
July 8, 2013
Dear Author,
I'm not sure whether to laud you as a genius, or call and have you committed to the local Mental Institution. At the moment, I leaning towards the latter because I think you should be subjected to the same electric shock therapy (torture)I was when reading your book.
I'm sure it's not escaped your attention, but a zombie is a bit more dangerous than a volleyball, though she has roughly the same personality.
However, while T. Hanks manages to sell an entire movie talking to a volleyball, you as author fail miserably, I'm afraid which is why I'm only giving you four stars.
You obviously know nothing about the sheer desperation of survival and how it reduces a man to a wild animal trying to fulfill basic needs. Of course, I'm talking about the need to procreate and save his endangered species. At some point, your MC should have looked at his pet zombie as a love interest, exploring the trials and tribulations of a relationship with a zombie (Which I'm thinking would not be that much different than dating a TV Reality Star.)
I'm disappointed and expect you to do much better in the next go around...
Sincerely,
your number two and half fan,
TheReviewNutt
I'm not sure whether to laud you as a genius, or call and have you committed to the local Mental Institution. At the moment, I leaning towards the latter because I think you should be subjected to the same electric shock therapy (torture)I was when reading your book.
I'm sure it's not escaped your attention, but a zombie is a bit more dangerous than a volleyball, though she has roughly the same personality.
However, while T. Hanks manages to sell an entire movie talking to a volleyball, you as author fail miserably, I'm afraid which is why I'm only giving you four stars.
You obviously know nothing about the sheer desperation of survival and how it reduces a man to a wild animal trying to fulfill basic needs. Of course, I'm talking about the need to procreate and save his endangered species. At some point, your MC should have looked at his pet zombie as a love interest, exploring the trials and tribulations of a relationship with a zombie (Which I'm thinking would not be that much different than dating a TV Reality Star.)
I'm disappointed and expect you to do much better in the next go around...
Sincerely,
your number two and half fan,
TheReviewNutt
December 1, 2014
The Zombie Wilson Diaries are, first and foremost, fun. A very tongue-in-cheek parody of Cast Away, The Zombie Wilson Diaries tell the tale of a bookkeeper who is in a plane crash and ends up the sole living survivor, who gets washed up onto a deserted island. At the onset, he struggles with the typical kind of things you might expect - shelter, food, water. But not too far into his exile, he discovers that another passenger "survived" the plane crash only to run afoul of some local berries on the same island - berries that kill her and turn her into a zombie.
The rest of the book is an amusing tale of how the main character has to deal with living with a single companion. He knows she is dangerous, yet he cannot bring himself to dispatch of her, since she is his only companion. Each night he vows to get rid of her; each morning he finds another reason not to.
This is not a deep, thought-provoking book, but as a spoof and parody of the film and the zombie genre, it's golden. Though I personally didn't care for the ending (I feel like the author didn't quite know hot to bring the fun premise to a conclusion), I recommend this book as a light-hearted take on the Zombie genre.
The rest of the book is an amusing tale of how the main character has to deal with living with a single companion. He knows she is dangerous, yet he cannot bring himself to dispatch of her, since she is his only companion. Each night he vows to get rid of her; each morning he finds another reason not to.
This is not a deep, thought-provoking book, but as a spoof and parody of the film and the zombie genre, it's golden. Though I personally didn't care for the ending (I feel like the author didn't quite know hot to bring the fun premise to a conclusion), I recommend this book as a light-hearted take on the Zombie genre.
August 18, 2013
this concept is absolutely awesome! think Cast-a-way w/Tom Hanks & Wilson the Volleyball. it's very similar as Zombie Wilson is very much like talking to a ball. Biggest difference of course being that I don't think Wilson EVER tried to eat Tom Hanks during their time together on the deserted island!
I love how well Timothy made the main character really lifelike as we all know being sexually frustrated isn't fun & if you get desperate enough.... there is a thought about taking Zombie Wilson & having his way w/her! major set back to it is well .... She is ZOMBIE!?! haha I love the funny lil play on words humor as well as, my girlfriend has crabs... coming out of her hair. Look at the size of those pinchers! haha how many of you thought I was talking the other something else entirely??? haha Again Timothy long has gone it again! Timothy knows just exactly how to make things happen at just the right timing! though there are times you will to laugh so hard you might have problems breathing right so be sure to take precautionary positions as you read this marvelous book! Enjoy this one & many of the others he has written!!!!!
I love how well Timothy made the main character really lifelike as we all know being sexually frustrated isn't fun & if you get desperate enough.... there is a thought about taking Zombie Wilson & having his way w/her! major set back to it is well .... She is ZOMBIE!?! haha I love the funny lil play on words humor as well as, my girlfriend has crabs... coming out of her hair. Look at the size of those pinchers! haha how many of you thought I was talking the other something else entirely??? haha Again Timothy long has gone it again! Timothy knows just exactly how to make things happen at just the right timing! though there are times you will to laugh so hard you might have problems breathing right so be sure to take precautionary positions as you read this marvelous book! Enjoy this one & many of the others he has written!!!!!
October 7, 2013
OMG! What a fun book to read!!! This story has got to be the most entertaining zombie story I have ever read! It was funny and serious at the same time. I can’t imagine being stranded on a desert island at all but to be stranded and have a zombie on it too??? What would I do…probably bash its head in immediately but the hero of our story had other plans for it and for him…it worked. I simply loved this story and was totally entertained for hours reading all of the descriptive writing that went into this story by the author and there was definitely a lot of descriptions of the island…the zombie…the coconuts…the yummy food…and everything else that our islander had to endure! Yes….this was an enjoyable… imaginative and entertaining read! One that I recommend to all who love zombie stories…who would love to be stranded on a deserted island…who love a good story that makes you laugh out loud and to those who just are looking for a story that will take your mind off of the ho-hum every day boring things in life! Thank you Mr. Long for a great story and I look forward to reading more of your books!
June 28, 2010
I have not read a lot of zombie stories, preferring science fiction or regular fiction, but the title and tag-line of this book caught my attention. I worried at first that the "gag" of a man stranded on an island with just a zombie "girlfriend" would wear out, but the book was a pleasant surprise. Written as a journal, the book is very humorous but also does a great job exploring the ramifications for the main character dealing with being isolated with just a non-communicative zombie. The titles of the journal entries are inspired, with names such as "My Girlfriend has Crabs." The double meanings are entertaing to try and figure out, and the actual meanings are often different than I expected.
Overall, a fun read, and an enjoyable romp through the zombie stereotypes in a very different setting. As a warning, the story starts a bit slowly, but picks up steam as the main character gets stranded and the adventures begin. Do yourself a favor and pick this up to read on a trip or at the beach.
Overall, a fun read, and an enjoyable romp through the zombie stereotypes in a very different setting. As a warning, the story starts a bit slowly, but picks up steam as the main character gets stranded and the adventures begin. Do yourself a favor and pick this up to read on a trip or at the beach.
April 30, 2012
I complain a LOT about how hard it is to find a funny book. I stumbled across this one accidentally (isn't that always the way?) and found it amusing. Not laugh out loud, I'm going to pee my pants funny, but humorous throughout.
I'm not a fan of diary entries as a writing style, but that's just a personal preference thing. I did love the stick figure drawings scattered through the diary. And honestly, who doesn't love a good zombie story? And his wavering between having the hots for the rotting zombie (who started out hot) and wanting to vomit because of her smell was highly entertaining.
This book is absurd in the best possible way. It's like Shaun of the Dead meets Clue (the movie) meets Island of the Sequined Love Nun. Hmm, maybe that's not the way to make it sound appealing, but trust me, zombie goo has never been so funny.
I'm not a fan of diary entries as a writing style, but that's just a personal preference thing. I did love the stick figure drawings scattered through the diary. And honestly, who doesn't love a good zombie story? And his wavering between having the hots for the rotting zombie (who started out hot) and wanting to vomit because of her smell was highly entertaining.
This book is absurd in the best possible way. It's like Shaun of the Dead meets Clue (the movie) meets Island of the Sequined Love Nun. Hmm, maybe that's not the way to make it sound appealing, but trust me, zombie goo has never been so funny.
September 22, 2013
This isn't your normal zombie story about a group of survivors facing humongous hoards of the walking dead, it's one man and one female zombie, although a couple more do show up later, and one of them is not even human.
It all starts off with a plane crash on a desert island, a stewardess and a weird plant on the beach, & what follows is an amusing account of day to day survival written in the form of a daily diary. Not only is finding food & shelter an issue, but not being bitten by his rapidly decomposing companion is also high on his survival list. Our man does eventually get to another island with his zombie in tow & finds more survivors on another island, unfortunately they don't believe she's a zombie until it's to late.
The story is set to continue with a second book with a boat full of lunch, sorry people for zombie Wilson to play with.
It all starts off with a plane crash on a desert island, a stewardess and a weird plant on the beach, & what follows is an amusing account of day to day survival written in the form of a daily diary. Not only is finding food & shelter an issue, but not being bitten by his rapidly decomposing companion is also high on his survival list. Our man does eventually get to another island with his zombie in tow & finds more survivors on another island, unfortunately they don't believe she's a zombie until it's to late.
The story is set to continue with a second book with a boat full of lunch, sorry people for zombie Wilson to play with.
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