Special Forces: Soldiers Part I -Director's Cut

Special Forces #1 part 1

by Aleksandr Voinov, Marquesate, Vashtan

Special Forces is an epic work of military gay erotic fiction.

The three cycles Soldiers, Mercenaries, and Veterans were written between April 2006 and November 2008 and have 70 chapters in total, comprising around one million words (the equivalent of around 15 full-sized novels). It is only suitable for an adult audience.

This is the epic story of a Soviet Spetsnaz soldier and a Scottish SAS soldier. Vadim Krasnorada and Dan McFadyen are two enemies who meet in the line of duty during the early days of the Soviet Union's last war in Afghanistan. Behind enemy lines respect and finally love grow...but that's only the official version.

(This is a not-for-profit paperback edition)

Special Forces: Soldiers, part I: chapters 1-11.

Genres: M M Romance, Military Fiction, Enemies To Lovers, BDSM, Romance, Dark, Erotica

409 pages, Paperback

First published March 1, 2010

About the author

https://aleksandrvoinov.substack.com/

Reviews

[Monique · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent..is not powerful enough to describe it! 5 stars is an insult..this book is in a class all on it's own!



I was told by my dear friends who have walked this path before me that this series is all encompassing! it will take over your life!....with all thoughts of a normality whilst reading being dismissed as impossible!

OMFG!-after falling in a heap, a jibbering wreck of my former self and having discussed it with said friends in a previous thread, this book should come with the following:

Health Warning: Causes severe irritability, weight lose, extreme emotional swings, compulsive need to consume any and all alcohol, decreased work productivity and alienation from friends and family.

In other words..don't mess with the the snarky bitch, downing a bottle of wine, eyes glued to Kindle oblivious to all and everything, rocking in the corner. Ignore all expletives that could possible make Dan's language seem tame. You want food?-call for pizza! School uniform?-it's fine..you can wear it again tomorrow! I am now officially in the terrible Mother category!

Having read the Dark Soul Vol. 1 series by Mr. Voinov I was already prepared for how powerful and tortuous his words alone can be. But this collaboration with Marquesate and their words which weaved together so seamlessly was sublime in it rendition.

At the time of finishing this book, I was so overwhelmed by anxiety, frustration, anger, fear, sorrow, my ramblings were incoherent and totally FANGIRL..SQEEEEE! my mind was mush! A week later, even though Vadim and Dan still haunt me, I have found the calm within and I am ready to start the next book Special Forces: Soldiers Part II -Director's Cut and also put pen to paper, on my thoughts of this truly extraordinary relationship and the journey that I have embarked on, with these two, highly-complex and intense characters who despite their nefarious actions and the depth of raw emotion involved, I was completely enthralled.

This Book takes Place in Afghanistan between 1980-1989. Dan is an undercover SAS British Soldier and Vadim is a Captain in the Soviet Unions equivalent of the SAS, the Spetznaz. I found the alternating POV compelling, seeing each character in my minds eye, turning my head to look at them with their distinct voices and the evocative dialog. Vadim with his broken English, only endeared him to me more and Dan with his typical squaddie foul mouthed language had me at times smiling but for the most part I was swearing right back at him...must be contagious!

We are constantly drip fed information, with layers peeled back slowly throughout, discovering another nuance of each character, a thread of information left dangling until further on that thread is picked up and woven back into the story. Initial thoughts dispelled and new ones created. Mr. Voinov is very clever at this, he makes US think! Do we know these men? Do we want to know these men?...we are seduced, like a siren calling, we fall further into their world and just WANT.

I could write reams on how wonderful this book is, It is gritty, dirty, raw! We are dropped in the middle of a war torn country where nobody is your friend and everyone your enemy, we can see the filth, dirt, death, blood, sweat. The smell assaults our senses. We see conditions you wouldn't want your worst enemy experiencing. We are subjected to atrocities that make you cry. So angry! to the point of sheer frustration and the panic beyond belief - at the pain and torture inflicted. But somewhere in the middle of all this the seeds are sown for a fledgling relationship, crudely balanced and founded on the most extreme of circumstances, the intensity of it so overwhelming it will leave your heart broken and in pieces!

I will leave my character reviews for the next book, or this will become laboriously long and boring, with me rambling on!

Read this book...you will not regret it, and it is FREE (Sorry, I am struggling with this, really! I don't understand why it is not a Best Seller, never mind being available as a free download) and can be downloaded directly from Aleks website. http://www.aleksandrvoinov.com/specia...


For more reviews visit Sinfully Sexy Books

[Candy M. · Rating 5 out of 5]

⭐5 “Enemies to lovers but write the enemies in ALL CAPS” stars⭐

I must confess, I’ve been circling these books for a while now. Yet due to some… unsavory spoilers I read about the sequels, I had decided to avoid them like the plague. After a kind soul (Elena) told me the first two volumes worked as standalones, however?

I was all in.

In fact, right now the only struggle I’m facing is…


Which is exactly how you know the first one was a winner.

******************************

Before we commence…

WARNING: this book is a DARK take on the enemies-to-lovers trope. The protagonists are, for all intents and purposes, horrible people. It features explicit sexual assaults (emphasis on the plural), torture, graphic murders, abuse of power, and pretty much everything bad humanity has to offer rolled up into one juicy read.

This review will discuss most of the above (and make some jokes along the way), so if the topics upset you, please be aware of that.

*******************************

With that settled…

A PRELUDE

Fuck me sideways and call me Sally, this was hands-down the most intense story I’ve picked up in a long while. Filled with hatred, sensuality, larger underlying historical and philosophical themes, and topped with two complex protagonists that kept me on edge, equal parts enthralled and horrified.

Here you meet two soldiers on opposite sides, a brit and a soviet facing each other with the backdrop of the tail ends of the Cold War, and even from the very first chapter (which features a very graphic scene of one of the MCs raping the other, mind you), you will be bombarded by a distinct lack of empathy and humanity.

A world where the only kind of justice that exists is revenge.

Where you witness empty ideas and morals explored and dismantled (vestiges of the agendas spewed by each government with the sole purpose of justifying their own ethical shortages). A place to become acquainted with humiliation, retribution, and lastly, if you decide to read on, a need so deep as to finally snap awake two men in the midst of it all.

Lust born from rage, hatred, and unfairness. Wielded as both a weapon for punishment and a blanket of comfort. To humiliate and to hold, because the edges when it comes to these two are never clear cut, and therefore expecting any raw emotion to remain unchanged here would be an exercise in futility.

But now, before I get (even more) ahead of myself, let me split the actual review into three parts, for the sake of organization if nothing else. Those sections below will be for the MCs, Dan and Vadim, plus their Relationship as a whole.


So let’s commence.

— DAN.

He was a funny guy. A misogynistic and homophobic pig drowning in enough denial —about his own victimization, his sexuality, and his subsequent attachment to Vadim, the perpetrator of his trauma— to put the Iceberg that sank the Titanic to shame. Yet, exhibiting what might as well be a display of witchcraft, the authors still succeeded at making him endearing in an extremely fucked up way.

Because don’t be mistaken for a second, Dan was every terrible stereotype about uber masculine military guys rolled into one. If Die Hard, Rambo, and Robert De Niro in Taxi Driver (AKA Mr. “Are you talking to me?”) managed to conceive a baby, Dan would be their offspring.

Nonetheless, to give you all an idea of the true ridiculousness that was this man, let me drop some moments of his:

(Context: Dan’s denial rearing its head after a rendezvous with Vadim.)

“Damn, he wanted to bury his nose into the scent of sun, heat, skin and man. Tasting the sweat and biting the flesh.
He did nothing. Just blinked again. One thing to fuck a man— another to kiss his neck.”

Vadim might’ve been the one who was an ex-Olympic athlete, but Dan’s mental gymnastics put him to shame.


His logic at work.

And then, probably one of my favorite moments of disturbing hilarity:

🚨
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Slight Spoilers

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🚨

(Context: Vadim asked Dan to keep things interesting in the bedroom, and the latter then proceeded to show Vadim his disturbing take on bondage, all under the guise of spicing things up.)

“The moment the Russkie turned, the hefty club he’d stored in the corner came crashing against the man’s temple. “That interesting enough for you, bastard?”

He watched the body crash to the dried-mud floor. “Time for another fag lesson, I think.” He rushed to his bergan, pulled out ropes and dragged the unconscious body towards the centre of the room. He’d chosen the building specifically for its low beam and the pillars that stood closely together. Sturdy wood, just right for a Russian cunt.”

@ Vadim:


He literally never saw that one coming, uh?

So yes, to put it mildly, Dan not only had ISSUES, but he might as well have invented the definition. The Danprint, if you will. Yet it was those exact problems and his frankly psychotic behavior which made him so entertaining to read.

In short…

Dan: *blinks*

Me:


Still love the bastard though.


— VADIM.

Aka my fave. War criminal, serial rapist, unrepentant murderer, a fanatic of personal hygiene, loving father, and a bit of a philosopher. What can’t the guy do, truly? 😍

The fact that a man like him could be someone I wanted to wrap around in a blanket and hug probably says a lot about me. In my defense, the character work was so impeccable, it was becoming increasingly hard not to empathize with the guy past a certain point. I understood his inner workings, the way the ingrained soviet beliefs and duties had warped his sense of self, and even if I obviously couldn’t approve of his actions (because seriously, serial rapist), it was once more a testament to the authors’ abilities that I found myself still appreciating the man.

From a husk of a soldier with an absolute need for control and domination, to someone who learned how appealing standing with someone as an equal (demented, violent, and still perpetually wanting) could be.

Below, some of my favorite moments of his:

🚨
🚨

Slight Spoilers Again

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🚨

(Context: Vadim runs into Dan in the middle of a raid, where he has to figure out the way to save the guy without making his comrades suspicious.)

“The leopard is a cruel lover. His tenderness breaks the gazelle’s heart.”

Vadim kept his lips against Dan’s as he placed the pistol against the left shoulder, could feel the muscle, sensed the correct spot. Pulled the trigger.”

Get you an enemy turned fuckbuddy who will shoot you to spare you from death 😌

To his own admission of just how fucked up he is:

“Dan’s dark brows rose, surprise and amusement. “Not sure if I’d want you as my comrade.” Smirked, but nodded, understanding.

“I’m Special Forces. Other soldiers think we’re scary anyway.” But no, you don’t want to be my comrade, because I might jump you at night and fuck your ass.”

Man was out here admitting to sexual assault as if he were discussing supper. When I said these two were horrible humans, I meant it!

To sum up my complicated relationship with Vadim:




— THE RELATIONSHIP.

I would honestly struggle to even consider this a true romance at all, since I believe most of the romantic developments and breakthroughs will take place in the next volume. If anything, the switch in dynamics you witness here is more of a transition from enemies to enemies with benefits.

We do, however, get to see animosity and pure loathing turn into camaraderie and burning need, an urge that the protagonists attempt to pass as mere lust rather than any form of emotional attachment. And something which starts ringing less and less true as the chapters go on.

So, all in all, @ every other enemies-to-lovers book I pick up from now on…


Like sure, you hate each other, but have you pressed a knife to his crotch while you blew him? Have you tortured the guy who sexually assaulted you all while fantasizing about his ass? No? Well, Imma have to pass then 🥱😴

I now could include more quotes, meaningful moments that left me bewildered, uncomfortable and yet oddly touched. Instants where both Dan's hunger for revenge and Vadim's craving for punishment (y’all can’t convince me the man is not a masochist) transformed into a considerably unhealthy need for the other. Where consent was blurred, power dynamics shifted, and somewhere along the lines affection started seeping through. An affection that was bizarre, unwelcomed, despised, yet still there all the same.

Instead, let me just drop this Bernie meme and call it a day.



******************************

Now, in case you are still unsure on whether this deliciously fucked up book is for you…

Keywords to help you out

ENEMIES-to-lovers. But make them fuckbuddies for now. Slowest of the slowburns when it comes to emotions. Damaged trust. Graphic depictions of sexual assault (Vadim rapes Dan in the first chapter). Dubious Consent (Dan molests Vadim on a few occasions). Horrible MCs which you can't help but like against your better judgment. If Toxic Masculinity and Internalized Homophobia walked into a bar… *this book is the punchline*. Historical setting done right. Realistic portrayals of what war does to the human psyche. Sexual tension in spades. Possessiveness. And not exactly a conclusion, but a prelude to a HFN which will be had in the next installment.


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Special Forces Series by Aleksandr Voinov and Marquesate.

Soldiers: Director's Cut Volume One — 5 ⭐
Soldiers: Director's Cut Volume Two — TBR.

(Won’t be reading the rest of the series past this point due to personal reasons, but still listing it for accuracy’s sake)

Mercenaries: Volume One — X.
Mercenaries: Volume Two — X.
Veterans — X.

[Blacky *Romance Addict* · Rating 5 out of 5]

"The man wanted him. Might not know why, or when, but there was something pure and wild and feral in this. Something perfect."





I am emotionally drained. Don't know if it's a good thing, but I do know that this will be a book that I will NEVER forget as long as I have a functioning brain inside my head.


Now I really really wish my English was better, because I just don't know how to describe this book. It is just EVERYTHING. The range of emotion this put me through... and every single one of them was intense. Nothing mellow about this book.

“Funny,” Dan murmured at long last, “it’s another first today.” He paused, “You seem to be the one for firsts,” his breath caught, “and lasts and always.”

This book was a lot of firsts for me too. Here they are;


MY FIRST WAR EPIC

I think it's my first war book altogether. The story takes place during the war in Afghanistan (1980's) and follows two characters, a Soviet Spetsnaz, Captain Vadim Krasnorada and a Scottish SAS soldier, Dan McFadyen. It is brutal. War, violence, rape, torture, massive graves, genocide, you name it. I didn't think I could stomach a war book before, but strangely, it was really interesting to read about it. Maybe it was in the writing, or the story itself, but the gruesome and violent parts were so terribly intriguing. Like watching a train wreck. I wanted to understand it better, wanted to see more into their heads, I wanted them to fight, and I loved those scenes where they kicked each other's asses. I won't go into any detail about the story because you really shouldn't know. It's an experience to be constantly shocked and thrown back, so me telling you what it's about... not much help :)

"He wanted the man so desperately. Had wanted him like the bullet, like death, like going home."

FIRST CHARACTERS THAT I'VE GROWN TO LOVE, AND THEY DID SOMETHING TOTALLY AND UTTERLY UNFORGIVABLE

I don't think there's anyone here that doesn't know what happens at the very beginning of the book (or at least if you're thinking of reading it, you should know). Vadim rapes Dan with a fellow comrade. Now, while reading that, I was appalled. Shocked. How could this man be the main guy?? How could they ever have anything between them that isn't pure hatred?? He could. And they could. Dan was fueled by revenge, and he did some unforgivable things also. And now I know this book did a real mindfuck on me. I was rooting for Dan to get his revenge. Do some harm to Vadim, he deserved it. When it happened? I wanted to cry for Vadim, felt so bad for him. Is that normal? I don't know. This book just didn't provoke any normal responses from me, because somehow I started to like both Dan and Vadim. I wanted to know what they were thinking. I wanted them to meet more often. Then I wanted them to never be apart! And by the end, I just loved them both. So, if anyone told me I'd be loving a rapist and a torturer character, I'd say they were crazy. I guess I'm the crazy one now.

"He let go of Dan’s neck, then, without thinking much, took his face into both hands and kissed him. Just like that, like the Hungarian fencer. No fear, or misgivings, body to body. Fairly chaste, as the thought of teasing, arousing and passion seemed far away. Smelling the soap, the damp skin from the shave, and the long hair. Tasting what amounted to bitterness. Tears."

FIRST BOOK WITH SO MANY SEX SCENES IN IT

This part really got me by surprise. I didn't expect that much sex (not complaining though XD). But the way it was done! It's like it wasn't just sex, it was the evolution of their relationship and how they changed through the years. Every scene was different, and brought something new between them. They pushed the boundaries, tried everything, rough, gentle, and it took them long enough to come to terms with their feelings (other than intense lust and obsession). I was just wow-ed. The most intense M/M sex scenes I've ever read.


FIRST BOOK WITH -THAT- MUCH SWEARING

If I combine the English swear words I've heard so far in my life, it wouldn't amount to how many were in this book XD I'm not a big swear person so it kinda shocked me. I'd be happy never to hear or see the word 'c*nt' or 'c*cksucker' ever again in my life. Sadly, I know I've got more SF books to read XD and I'll probably top this record lol






FIRST BOOK THAT PROVOKED THREE HOURS OF CRYING

While reading this, I was definitely 99% feeling. I don't know how many times I cried over a particular scene, but after that 75%, it was constant. Just one blow after another. I kept crying even at the good scenes, don't know why, maybe it was just too much emotion and it had to go out somewhere. I sometimes hate the fact that I'm a sucker for sad scenes. The most I ever cried (fiction related) was after I finished 'Brokeback Mountain'. Cried constantly for 45 minutes. After the movie 'Devdaas', I sat in shock for an hour, wasn't able to say a word, than I cried for another hour. This book broke another record. Over 3 hours of crying from 75% to the end of the book, and then some after I finished. NEVER have I read or been influenced by something this emotional.



THE FIRST SEX SCENE THAT GOT ME WET - IN THE WRONG PLACE!!!!

Now, this is a long, long scene. And I cried through every line of it. Yes, their sex made me cry like a baby (the ending of the book if anyone's wondering). The saddest love scene I've ever read, even if the sex was nothing but rough, pain, lust, desire, power, dominance and submission. I cried. I knew what it meant and what was coming. And every single thing they did just underlined that, and I was sobbing while they were doing it. Normal?? Don't think so. But then again, I already said this book didn't provoke normal responses by me.




This is the only thing that will keep me going through Special Forces.

“I will be back.” No matter what, no matter how. “I will find you.” Whatever it takes.

I want to thank my beautiful friends who encouraged me to pick this up, everyone in the buddy read. I'll never forget this book. EVER.


*no emoticons in this review, I just couldn't, it's too beautiful and too painful and too emotional and too... TOO*

[Baba · Rating 5 out of 5]

Review completed October 19, 2012



Dan. Always.

"All is fair in love and war."
by Francis Edward Smedley

First read of the Director's Cut in October 2012. I've read the original version in August 2011. A huge and heartfelt thankyou to Kelly, Blacky, Steph & Heller for doing the buddy-read with me! <3

5++++ stars.

Fantastic! A-mazing with a capital A. I think it's even better the second time around. Honestly, Soldiers just blew me away once more.

Special Forces is the story of a Scottish SAS soldier and a Soviet spetsnaz soldier. Two enemies who meet in the line of duty during the early days of the Soviet Union's last war in Afghanistan. SF is an epic because the story of Dan and Vadim spans twenty-five years of their lives.

Special Forces--Soldiers is the first cycle of the Special Forces epic. Dan and Vadim are "meeting" for the first time in August 1980, in Kabul. The second cycle is Mercs I and II (2 books) and the third one is Veterans. The whole epic comprises around one million words. Take your time and read it.

Enemies…from hatred to love.
 
One million words of:
Anger. Hatred. Torture. Violence. Cruelty. Pain. Swearing. Agony. Anguish. Crying. Despair. Stress. Franticness. Blood, sweat and tears. Death. Insanity. Awfulness. Doubts. Separation. Communication. Lack of communication. Miscommunication. Tension. Frustration. Satisfaction. Lust. Need. Passion. Sex. Tenderness. Vulnerability. Dedication. Heroism. Mercy. Hope. Darkness. Shadow. Light. Happiness. Gratitude. And above and beyond…despite all the misgivings a deep-rooted love.

Prayer beads. Vadim's gift to Dan.



So many books pale compared to SF—a mere dust in the wind, vanished into Nothing. SF is pure insanity in its intensity, gripping from the get-go, oh-so shocking, brutal and ugly at times but this story will consume you and swallow you whole. As a matter of fact, the words and characters will cut right through your heart. The authors did a superb job at portraying two multi-layered and battle-scarred characters. War is showing its ugly and gruesome face. And yet I loved to see that among all this insanity there is honor to be found. Dan said he is not a good man but at his core he is honorable because he spared Vadim's life when he called to him as a soldier or when he tried to shelter the young German soldier.

"You want to know why I didn't cut your balls off, stuffed them down your throat and watched you die? You want to know it? I don't give a shit about you, Russkie, family kids, wife, village, country, beliefs, sexuality or not. I don't give a flying fuck. I saw you take down the village, I watched you bring out the mothers by splattering their children's brains into the dirt. You call yourself a killer? I call that a murderer, and if you had died under my hands, cunt, I would have been one of you. And that's why you live--no more, no less, no other reason. I didn't continue because you asked for the mercy to die as a soldier, because you called to me as a soldier, and that's what I am."--Dan

I adored Dan's deep, deep love for the Afghan mountains. Further, I adored the interaction between Dan and the British ambassador, Baroness de Vilde (Maggie). What he did for her is invaluable but she knows it, and she gave back by being loyal, very supportive, understanding and caring. Always. A true lady made of steel, however, at her core she is utterly kind-hearted. Throughout this epic I came to really like Vadim but then again, there is no love lost between him and me. My emotions are all over the place when a man is raping men because he enjoys to do it and when he has no qualms whatsoever to kill innocent children and women. My friends know where I stand and I will admit it's a somewhat lonely place to be. Yes, he made mistakes, he is flawed. However, all the Dan bashing is kinda depressing and not really fair because there are reasons why he changed. And please "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone." Isn't it rather convenient to forget about that? With that said, I'd appreciate it if we could differentiate a bit more.
 
Enemy mine. An “enemy” in a wilderness of insanity
“It’s another first today.” He paused. “You seem to be the one for firsts,” his breath caught, “and lasts and always.” --Dan
 


“Tell me what do you remember?”
“I don’t want to talk.” Dan’s neck muscles tensed resisting Vadim’s hand. He didn’t know the words and he didn’t want to search for them. “I just want to feel. But no, that wasn’t it. “I want to feel human.” --Dan
 
What follows suit is my favorite love scene. It was not about sex—it was so much more and went way deeper. It's love.

"You…" just you, always you. My Russian cunt, my enemy, my comrade, my prisoner, my gaoler and my life. Words, unthinking. "Love…you." --Dan

Couldn't hear his own groans echo in the cave, mind screaming for release, knew he'd do anything, absolutely everything for this man, suck him, kill, kill himself, run away, be something else, anything else, everything just blurred, darkness, a place inside that only held him and Dan. Nobody else, nothing else, no time, no place, no affiliations, no past, no future. --Vadim

First and foremost Dan and Vadim's "relationship" is about a profound lust and need. Their internal tensions are very palpable and engaging. But there's no going back--their relationship evolves slowly yet steadily and it's so incredibly rewarding to see them fall in love with each other. The sex is rough and edgy and that's why I treasured the rare moments of tenderness all the more. Death was always hovering over their heads and the reader has a hard time to really believe in their HEA. Well, you know the saying "Good things come to those who wait."

The ending of Soldiers is emotionally charged, frantic and full of despair and angst--I could feel the goosebumps on my skin. In fact, it will leave you absolutely breathless and wanting for more. While the war had kept them together, peace was tearing them apart.


Warning
Even though I can't recommend this epic enough, please be aware that Special Forces contains very graphic violence, language and sex. It's not for the faint of heart.



"Hold me," he murmured with a strained voice. "Just f***ing hold me."

[Aleksandr Voinov]

https://vashtan.weebly.com/

This is the improved "Director's Cut" version. I fixed about a million typos, factual mistakes, clunky point-of-views shifts, mistakes in word choice and pacing issues that were overlooked in the original edit. To edit well, I need to get distance from the text, which can take a year or even two. This is the version that represents my vision of the text.

In terms of changes, the text ends a little earlier than the original "Soldiers", so it can stand on its own. The final battle in the hotel has been moved to the start of "Mercenaries", but no other big changes have been made.

[Anna (Bananas) · Rating 4 out of 5]

Edit: Not recommended for Voinov newbies. Fall in love with something else by him first. Then tackle this monster.

This book tortured me, but I've barely finished Soldiers and already I'm starting to make the kind of heartfelt, sputtering, confusing comments to SF virgins that SF fans used to gasp at me before I read this book. For example:

It's such a tough read but it's worth it!
You will hate these characters AND love them!
It's unforgettable and painful and emotional!
You really should read it!!! (all 3 exclamation points neccesary)

Etc, etc times infinity. You may have noticed people do NOT shut up about SF. Don't dare bring it up on any thread or status at any time, because all-consuming, neverending discussion will ensue. Sometimes violence as well. (Team Vadim has many members and will kick Team Dan's ass when needed... I'm Team SF btw; I love and hate them both too much to pick one.) Yes, fair warning, SF will eat your thread like a tasty snack. Every time.

I can't review Soldiers without saying I struggled reading it and not for the reasons most people seem to. I did not fall in love with it quickly or easily. It took me 2 and a half months to read the whole thing. O_o

Soldiers is long. It could stand to lose 100 pages, easy. The first half draaagged for me. I was not engaged. I didn't sympathize much with either character. Even when they started messing around on a regular basis, there was very little emotion between them, which made it hard for me to work up any strong feelings either.

I was determined to finish though. This damn book was not going to win!

Then something happened about halfway through. I got interested. The mass grave scene was amazing, from both POVs - horrifying, visceral, complex. The war zone I'd been trudging through the entire book finally became real for me. The fisting scene pulled me in a little more. Chapter 15 with all it's slow, intimate, beautiful sincerity, it's complete expression of love, tugged at my heart.

Still, I was positive almost to the end that this was going to be a 3 star read for me, at best. I read those last few chapters (I screamed at and then subsequently cried with Vadim, I fell in love with Maggie, I hurt with Katya, I trembled with Nikolai, I beamed with Anoushka, I embraced the masseur, I ached with Dan and Vadim as they marked each other), and I arrived at the end...at which point I practically spit nails because HOW could it end there?!

But wait, why was I so upset? I had finally finished. I didn't have to read any further. This book and these characters that had driven me crazy for literally months - I could be done with them.

Too bad I couldn't get Dan and Vadim out of my head! I craved the rest of their story. I cared about them now. They'd gotten under my skin. Simply put, Soldiers is an experience. Its impact is strong, even when you resist. Dan and Vadim's story is, well, incomparable.

So I've come this far and I can't let them go. This is a damn journey. I'm seeing it through. Mercenaries, here I come...after a short breather.

To all my GR friends who told me this book was worth reading, I doubted you many, many, many times. I was wrong. This song goes out to you:
http://video.search.yahoo.com/video/p...

[LenaRibka · Rating 5 out of 5]

Re-read, 2014-01-06

********************************************

A masterpiece.

The best book ever.

A bible for all MM-genre fans.

A must-read before you die.

There are no words that can ever do justice to this book.

I wish I could describe it...

Dan and Vadim are always in my heart.

The best couple ever.

It was for sure not my last re-read.

****** Original review 2013-08-07 ****************


MUCH MUCH MORE THAN JUST 5 STARS!



I won't say WOW!

Because it is not enough.

Because it sounds trivially. banally, GENERALLY.

Because it is a way we use to say about books that we enjoyed, a way to tell all our GR and not GR friends, "Hey, here is something that you have to read!"

This book is brutal and row.
It is distressing and cruel.
It is dramatic.
It is intense.
It is mesmerizingly insane.
It is painfully beautiful.
It is disturbingly poetical.
It is captivating.
It is incredibly hot.
It is intriguingly fateful.
It is highly emotional .
It is heavenly engaging.
It is very graphical, no matter if it is sex or violence scenes.
It is DIFFERENT.
It is AMAZING.
It is STUNNING.

IT IS ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS I HAVE EVER READ!!



This book is everything but not trivial, not banal, not USUAL.

This book has turned my world upsides down.

This book is like a revelation for me.

This book has emotionally drained, exhausted me.

I am lost. I am lost. I am lost. I am lost...

It was the greatest and the best reading experience I have ever had.

I have just discovered my favorite genre.
Who could imagine it some days ago? Definetely not me.

I have just discovered the next one of my favorite authors and his name is Aleksandr Voinov.
His writing is addictive, provoking, intense, real!..
From now on I am going to read everything he has already wrote and everything he'll write.

Vadim and Dan, soviet speznaz and SAS soldier, they stole my heart. FOREVER. The character to die for...
Their ways crossed 1980. Kabul. The Afghan war. The Cold war. Two enemies. From hate to love.

"There’s no glory in this whole shit. No war is ever glorious. Heroes are usually dead. Besides, they rarely turn into heroes because they are super-humans, but because of circumstances.
Heroes rarely think. Heroes just act. So, all this is, is a stage for glory, small, personal and up to each one of us."

My Dan...

My Vadim...



...the first year they met...

Incredibly fascinating love story.
Honest. Real. Authentic. Aroused. Exciting. Great.

"He’d do anything, absolutely everything for this man, suck him, kill, kill himself, run away, be something else, anything else, everything just blurred, darkness, a place inside that only held him and Dan. Nobody else, nothing else, no time, no place, no affiliations, no past, no future."

"When you're like this, Vadim, I want to own you, and taste you, burrow all the way into your body until I feel so much it fucking hurts and your scent clings to every pore. I want to hurt you, tear you apart, fuck you until you plead and scream and bleed, and all that, because I can never get enough of you."

"If all they had was Afganistan, then he'd make it bloody worth it."

"I’d die for you, Dan. No questions asked."
"No, Vadim. No." Dan’s dark eyes were unforgivingly intense. "You must not die for me, not ever. You must live for me, you understand?"His fingertips rested on Vadim’s face. "Give me your word, you will live for me, whatever happens. Even if I never see you again. I need to believe that somewhere, out there, you are alive."

"Dan didn’t want to say anything, but the words were unstoppable. “I fucking love you. Don’t leave me. You’ve got to find me.” Again, fucking tears. Vadim shook his head, then pressed his face into the crook of Dan’s shoulder, hoped to hide his weakness and felt like a man condemned to die.
"I will... find you. If it’s the last thing I’ll do, I’ll come back. Nothing will stop me."

My reviews are always my emotions. I don’t describe a plot.
Just two words: READ IT.

IT WAS FUCKING BRILLIANT!!!!!!!

P.S I have to add something that is very important. There are so many versions of the different parts of the trilogy. And I have maybe to correct my review according athours. I have no idea how a writing duo works but if the result look like THAT, I have no objection.
GREAT JOB, Marquesate and Aleksandr!!!

[Laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

“those who dare, win”

What have I gotten my heart into? This book completely took over my head, heart, and soul. I’m in deep!
Special Forces tells the story of two enemies who dare to risk, feel, change, and love. My heart and emotions were pulled into an intoxicating, brutal, raw, punch-to-the-gut epic journey that made me cringe, swear, smile, care, crave, and love.

Meet Vadim Krasnorada and Dan McFadyen. Both men are soldiers with their country’s elite special forces stationed in Afghanistan in the 1980s. One Soviet officer. One Scottish in the British forces. Enemies. A relationship and bond that starts and burns with such violence and ugliness that spirals out of control, changes and forms something new. I’m sorry. My words are failing me here. Perhaps a slap across the face, fierce hug, or a slow, lingering trace of your spine with my fingernails could begin to express the feelings that ran through my body reading this book. But what Vadim and Dan did to my heart is just indescribable, fierce and all consuming. What these soldiers endured, witnessed, and sacrificed during the war cracked my heart wide open. How can a body and soul survive such pain and horror? Vadim and Dan found that something, that raw strength, that more in each other that kept them alive, moving, going, and feeling. This is a journey filled with emotion, sex, lust, need, humor, intelligence, and words. Oh…

The words! The power of a word will never cease to amaze me in this world. One word can make my heart puff up with love, my blood boil with anger, and send my head spinning with wonder and awe. Special Forces uses words with such force and control. All my years reading, I have never come across an author or book with more masterful control and power over words.

Enemy. War. Blood. Revenge. Hatred. Cunt. Pain. Submit. Mercy. Control. Power. Sex. Anger. Lust. Trust. Care. Decency. Strength. Tenderness. Want. Need. Mine. Intimacy. Love.

I felt every word. Every single one of those words hit me, but it was decency that remains with me today. Sad to say, but decency is never used in my world. I can’t tell you the last time I heard it. I miss and crave that word and all its meaning and emotion behind it now. That is what the words on these pages did to me. Made me yearn, crave and call out for more. The words, war, and men truly seized hold of me and never let go! Truly captivated me.

As you can tell, this story and characters made an impression on me. Everything this book offered will remain with me. The side characters--Katya, Darren, Baroness, the mountains, Afghanistan, and so many more—all added layers and love to the journey. The time, camaraderie, and little things that built over the years between the men—patching each other up physically and mentally, talking, sharing warmth and strength, blowing cigarette smoke the opposite direction, or removing a watch--all slowly and surely dazzled and stirred my senses. A love affair and battle I will take with me every single day.

Vadim and Dan have burrowed in deep and seized a big chunk of my soul to camp out in! :D But I miss them already.

Special Forces has become one of my favorite reading experiences. One I can’t wait to do again!

Christina! You! Thanks again, Lady! I would not have met Vadim and Dan without you. Many thanks and much love! I owe you a good bottle of vodka or whiskey, aye!


Btw…This is the part that broke me. I held my tears and sobs until….

India---

“Vadim took the refilled bottle, and trickled some liquid into Dan’s mouth.

He could do that for the rest of his life and not feel he’d wasted any of his talents.”

Hit me like a ton of bricks! Sobs and snot for the rest of the night! :D

[Sammy Loves Books · Rating 5 out of 5]

Damn the Kaleidoscope of emotions Dan, Scotish SAS, and Vadim, Russian Spetsnaz, have put me through this past week.



I damn them because I am too young to have read, quite possibly the most tragic yet most beautiful love story of my time. All love stories will forever be measured against Vadim and Dan, and I am most certain that they will all be out classed.



Voinov and Marquesate have managed to express, allowed me to feel, more intense emotions than I ever have while reading. These emotions have ranged from Shock, Anger, Hate, Desire for Revenge, Fear, Pity, Angst, Lust, Pain, Loyalty, Love and Despar. I'd find myself highly aroused one moment, only to have to grab a box of klenex for the hole in my chest, where my heart had been ripped from. I had to take breaks from reading; Hard to read around the tears. Tears of joy, and occasionally pain.

The emotions I feel for Vadim and Dan run deep. I consider myself fortunate to have experienced their all encompassing love. A love beyond Eros, greater than Philos, and seated deeply in the realm of Agape.

[Kaje Harper · Rating 5 out of 5]

This has to rank among the most intense books I have ever read in this genre. As it opens, both MC's are somewhat unlikeable men, particularly Vadim. The ability of the authors to make me care so intensely about a man who starts the book as a rapist, murderer and casual assassin of innocent children is remarkable.

The relationship between these MC's is like no other, violent at its core, intensely sexual, and yet gradually becoming caring, loving and by the end tender. Everything in the world conspires to keep them apart, to smash their bodies, torture their senses, confuse their minds. And in that hell that is war in Afghanistan, they find in each other a truth to live by, a center to hold to when the world falls apart, a hope when there is no hope.

This is a book that demands to be read in one sitting, and pushes you, heart aching, scared and yet warm with the strength of love, into the next one. It demands that you love a character who still unrepentantly kills those who get in his way (like the Pakistani patrols.) It makes you believe in a relationship where pain is inexorably mixed up with love, and where the searing touch of knife on flesh is a commitment and a benediction. And it all works, harshly and beautifully. Highly recommended.

[Rach · Rating 5 out of 5]

I cannot even begin to describe in words how amazing this book is.



Vadim and Dan have a relationship built on revenge, hate, passion and lust!

Sworn enemies fighting for their country as members of the army, where to be gay is a complete no go area. They had everything going against them!! Not to mention the awful incident which occurs at the beginning of their emotional journey towards love and each other!



This is an emotional, painful and harrowing book. History is a subject I prefer not to read in detail about yet I thoroughly enjoyed it!

The passion between Vadim and Dan made me fall in love with both characters, but especially Dan.

I laughed and cried and I swear at the end my heart bled for them. But that just goes to show what an absolutely brilliant author Aleksandr Voinov is to be able to evoke such emotion in his readers!



This book will stay with me a long time and has caused me to have many emotional outbursts even days after reading it. But not because of anything bad (if you want to know if their is a HEA press here There is a happy end in this book, and in my opinion it could have ended here. But that is not to say that I won't read the rest, as I most certainly will

I have to have a rest from reading the next instalment as I don't think my emotions can take it lol!

[Mel · Rating 5 out of 5]

As I am late to the party again, I guess there is already more or less everything said that can be said... And how the fuck am I supposed to rate a book that

- had me reflect and think and ponder like no book ever has
- I loved reading every minute and had me engrossed completely
- I stopped reading halfway through, completely satisfied but with no wish to find out more?

How peeps? How?

A year ago, Special Forces was on the list of books I would probably never ever ever read. Ever. Aleks was one of the authors I would never ever read because I'm a chicken. Or was. So... How did I end up here? There are some authors that led me to the place I'm in today. A huge thanks goes to John Goode, who made me stop running away, and to Alexis Hall who showed me there was just so much more to discover. Both are amazing guys who had and still have a huge impact on my life. And both are probably the reason I came out of my comfort zone and read a book by Aleks, Skybound, which kinda blew me away. Aleks is the author I've read the most books by this year. He's amazing and has won my trust and love completely, hence me reading this book, the one I wasn't gonna read because of its content.

The main reason I started this now was because I wanted to know if or how there can be anything but hate between a former rapist and his victim.

I went into this with an open mind because of Aleks. Because he's shown me with his other books what he is capable of.

So, Special Forces is, for me, on a first basis a character study and a journey into the depths of humanity. And as much as we wish otherwise, humans suck, every day, all over the world, through all the times. And we judge. Mostly, we judge the others, though.

If rape is one of your hard limits, do yourself a favour and stick to your personal boundaries and stay the heck away from this book. If, however, this should not be the case, I encourage you to read the book, because I personally think that this could have been written in a way that would make reading it a lot worse, and I am personally glad that this is on the other hand not glamoured over, not when it's happening nor later.

Should you give this story a chance, you can find out why and how a bond could be forged between two enemies. Maybe it's total bullshit. I've never been in such a situation, in war time, and I never want to be, and I never want to be able to judge.

I like to think that this is possible. I like to think that good things can be stronger than bad. I love to think that the good conquers the bad.


I've written super long and, I hope, thoughtful updates with added quotes, and while I usually don't do this, I think this time I encourage you to read them because it would be worth it.


The reason I'm not finishing the book—mind you, I've already read between 300 and 400 pages!—is that, for personal reasons, at the moment, I have a hard time concentrating on the same thing for a long time. And I'm stopping here happily because, for me, Vadim and Dan already have their happy outcome, for me, my curiosity is satisfied.

This was a great experience. I had a lovely time with my buddy reader Britta, and with all the other friends who chimed in here and then.


I still don't know about the rating. It feels weird giving 5 stars to a book that I have not finished, but it feels also wrong to not honour what I have read so far.

[Chippy Marco · Rating 5 out of 5]

Danny boy, yum...




Before reading this book I only had one favourite author, an intense writer that had my heart racing, my shackles up, and my eyes glued to the page. Mr Voinov has now been added to that very sort list of authors who know how to shock, but in the most riveting ways. I absolutely loved this book, and would've ploughed through it faster if I had a Kindle. But unfortunately I had to read it sneakily at work and at home when I should've been spending more quality time with my other half. But how could I not want to read this EPIC story of ultimate love and violence, so intense it had me crying for more (which I will get with the other books in this series, yay!)

Now, the characters. Vadim is an absolute arsehole at the beginning, a selfish rapist who thinks he can do anything because it's war. Then comes along Dan, and what he does to him is shocking. And from there Dan sets out to get revenge, and he sure as hell does, the things he does also shocking. Both men are just so intense, but everything that happens feels like it would for these men in this environment. And after what they do to each other, what's even more shocking is they gradually become reliant on each other, their sexual needs continuously pulling them together until feelings start to grow. And this doesn't happen fast, because this book spans quite a while, where they could be apart for months on end.

So, this progress in their relationship gradually changes both of them, Vadim the most, because how could anyone like him from that first encounter? But everyone of my friends who have read this loves Vadim. I think it's because he's such a tormented, complex creature that fascinates people continuously. Also Mr Voinov does such a good job in getting across Vadim's feelings, roping the reader into liking someone they shouldn't. These characters are outstanding, their thoughts, their actions, everything so intense. After I've finished a book that I have been waiting AGES to come out from another intense series I'll be onto book 2 of Vadim and Dan's story.

THIS BOOK IS VIOLENT AND HIGHLY SEXUALLY CHARGED, SO IT'S FOR MATURE READERS ONLY (R18).




Vadim, also yum.

[* Meli Mel * · Rating 5 out of 5]

*Buddy Read with Pervy Melissa and Panda Amanda*

~Review For Soldiers Part I and II~

6+++ Brilliantly Amazing Stars


I don't even think I can think properly after reading this book. My thoughts and emotions are in utter chaos. It was a heart achingly beautiful story of two unlikely men that fall in love. Dan McFadyen is a Scottish SAS Soldier and Vadim Krasnorada is a Russian Spetsnaz Soldier. Both are at war in Afghanistan. Both are enemies.

We're both lost, comrade, he thought. We are in a war we don't want to be in, we're both on the wrong side of it, and all we get out of this is...He sighed. Enough to keep me going.



"You're as close to a f*cking home as I get."

Their first meeting was anything but romantic. It all started by Dan getting raped by Vadim. I felt shock, disgust, and pain while reading this. This book brought out a whirlwind of emotions from me. I felt hatred, sadness, sympathy, happiness, love, lust, and many more. I don't know how it happened or when exactly, but I fell in love with these characters. Everything about them felt so real, and yes, they aren't perfect, but I fell in love anyways. I didn't think it would be possible considering what they had done in their past. Vadim raped while Dan tortured.

"I want you, Dan. More than anything. You...are in my blood, in my bones, I need...you. Do you undertand."



"You seem to be the one for firsts," his breath caught, "and lasts and always."

This whole book was in a span of about 10 years. So by then end of this book they had changed so much. They found in each other what the other didn't know they wanted or thought they could ever have. Watching their love grow was as heart warming as it was heart breaking. I cried so much reading this that by the end I was emotionally drained. But it was totally worth it. I really LOVED it! Nothing I write can describe how truly amazing this book was, so, you're going to have to read it to understand.

"You're mine." whispered, beginning to kiss along jaw and down the neck. "Your're mine, no-one else's. Not even Mother Russia's. You're mine."



"Aye," Dan whispered, "we'll be together." Tender kisses, now, light touches of fingers, hands, body, skin, and again and again his lips. "If you can't... then I will. I will find you. Wherever and however. Whatever it takes. Whatever it costs. Anything."

Thanks to my buddy readers for helping me get through this tough read. It was such a wonderful story :)

***

I HIGHLY recommend this book. It is dark and very graphic. So warning, it won't be for everyone.

[Kat · Rating 3 out of 5]

Uh oh! Soldiers just took my m/m virginity.

(edit: and therefore alone I need to re-read this to, I think, fully appreciate it)

And what a brutal, violent, intense and bloody hot read this was. Right up until page 200-something that is, after which I slowly started losing interest. Soldiers takes off in the most violent way possible, when Russian soldier Vadim and SAS soldier Dan meet during the Soviet war in Afghanistan in the 80's. They are both hardened Alpha males and instant sworn enemies. Not only because of their nationalities, also because of the things they put each other through. When attempts to kill each other don't yield immediate results, they try forcing each other into submission, not steering away from torture and rape while doing so.
I found myself blazing through the first hundred pages, engrossed by Soldier's rawness and intensity. By those men, circling around each other, undecided whether they should fuck or kill, or both. Amazing that the Voinov managed to keep that addictive intensity up for so long.

It was only when the tea-house entered the scene that I became a bit..bored. The hook ups became repetitive enough to let my attention wander to other aspects of the story. Such as the Soviet war, which obviously served only as an excuse to provide those tough blokes with a legitimate playground, to take them from sex scene to sex scene. They constantly bumped into each other: during patrols, sudden abductions by Mullah's or otherwise vague missions - only to have hard and violent sex. When one of them blew off the heads of Afghan children and women and we entered yet another cock sucking scene moments later...well, it simply got a bit blase.

I was hoping to sink my teeth into something more than casual lust and hate drenched encounters. But apart from vivid descriptions of cocks, there seemed to be so little character development. This is a problem for such a lengthy book. Dan appeared to be another man in the beginning, a somewhat nobler man that that "evil Russian". And I therefore expected an interesting contrast. But they later became so disappointingly similar. They uttered the same words, expressed the same ideas..it wasn't always easy to tell them apart during the sudden narrator shifts.
In the end, I got the impression that I was actually reading a script for a porn, starring actors dressed up as soldiers. There's nothing wrong with that, but you sure need a lot of stamina to plow through 409 pages of straightforward porn.

Although Vadim and Dan would say it's a piece of cake, ha! ;-)

You can download Soldiers for free from the website of the author.

[Julio Genao · Rating 4 out of 5]

Spectacular. Diabolical. Masterful. Irresistible fiction. I'm hooked. Damnation and hellfire: I'm so hooked. Onward.

[Elizabetta · Rating 5 out of 5]

Reading Special Forces/Soldiers by Aleksandr Voinov almost feels like a rite of passage. Let’s just say its reputation precedes it – it is a must read in the m/m romance genre, it is a long, gut and heart-wrenching journey that requires an investment of time and courage. But oh, is the journey worth it. With great skill this author takes us from an initial brutal act between our two protagonists, Dan and Vadim, that sets them up against each other in a struggle for vengeance and dominance; and then brings them (amazingly) together in a very unique courtship of discovery and acceptance of self. This is an epic and yes, very romantic story of redemption.

Centered in Afghanistan during the Soviet occupation of that country between 1980 and 1990, Dan and Vadim are working on opposing sides, military enemies. Dan, a Brit working as an undercover operative for the rebel side, and Vadim, an officer in the invading Soviet army, find their paths continually crossing and the Afghani countryside is their testing-ground. They are soldiers with a capital ‘S’-- a special breed of ops exquisitely trained to wreak havoc wherever it is needed… including in their personal lives. This is a joy-ride of testosterone-infused machismo posturing, of two ‘cock-o-the-walk’ protagonists so fueled by the need for control and power that they continually butt up against each other in a dangerous game of king of the mountain. You are hooked in from the start, wondering what new ways these two will come up with to gain the upper hand.

My favorite reads are always those that have a strong sense of place and time; that are evocative – you sense you can step off the page and into the literary landscape. Voinov gives us the heat, the cold, the dust and sweat of Afghanistan. The country and its cruel mountains, a veritable playground for the Special Forces, not only test and teach but seduce as well. These two men who have no real country, no place of acceptance of who they are, ultimately find a home that takes them as they are.

There are some small niggles… some editing issues in the ‘director’s cut’ version and at times the POV switches confuse (though in general I did marvel at how Voinov was able to keep the head hopping mostly fluid).

Quibbles aside, this is an exceptional, memorable piece of gay romance literature that pushes the boundaries of that genre. Highly recommended, but be forewarned – you will want to proceed directly to the second book… if you dare :)

[Britta ★ Nachteule ★ · Rating 5 out of 5]

**********BR with Mel. Starting May 2nd**********



***********************************

Preparing...

...big fluffy blanket for comfort? - Check!
...Gin, Gin and some more Gin? - Check!
...tissues (VERY IMPORTANT!!!)? - Check!
...lots of chocolate? - Check!
...pillow to punsh or cuddle if necessary? - Check!
...enough Tonic Water for the Gin? - ... Aaargh! *runs off to the supermarket*.... Check!



***********************************

So... Since this is just the first part of the book, I decided to review it as a whole, when I've finished part two.

My thoughts so far:

- Not for the faint of heart! Though I knew it beforehand, I still want to point it out.

- To be honest, the first chapter with the rape shocked me but I thought I would stomach it much worse.

- I hated Vadim at first but he's grown on me and I would even say I love him a teensy tiny bit.

- I like Dan... a lot! Even though he is a douche from time to time.

- There are so much UNF-moments! (I love it!)

- I wanted to shout at both and punsh them more than once. (Without actually knowing, why)

- It's not predictable. (I love it!)

- It sends you on an emotional rollercoaster. (I got the feeling it just started!)

- Gin was needed! (If you gonna read it, feel free to drink something different. Just make sure it's booze!)

- Chocolate gets less rapidly... have to stock it up!

- Oh and before I forget it: I love the way they bond!

So that's it for now. On to part two!

[Tina · Rating 4 out of 5]

What an awesome book! It was painful brutal, violent, heartbreaking, intense and fantastic. Particularly the psychological aspects of the book captured me and I couldn't read it without being affected by it. I am really running out of words to write a comment in English. So I'm going to make an exception and review the book in German. I'm in absolute need for my native language here (that's a first :)

**************

Okay, ohne die vielen positiven Kommentare hier bei Goodreads hätte ich die Special Forces Reihe wohl niemals zu lesen begonnen. Ich hab's nicht wirklich mit dem Militär und hatte deshalb keine große Lust, eine M/M Story mit diesem Background zu lesen. Aber gleich der Anfang hat mich in eine Situation geworfen, die mir sofort klar machte, dass in diesem Buch nichts so sein würde wie anfangs erwartet.

Das „Kennenlernen“ von Vadim und Dan hätte nicht furchtbarer und brutaler ausfallen können. Wie kann eine brutale Vergewaltigung zu einem „sich annähern“ und später zu einer Beziehung führen? Als Vadim Dan seinem Genossen Vanya mit dem Auftrag überlässt, ihn nach dem „Gebrauch“ zu töten, dachte ich wirklich nur: „Wtf? Wie realistisch oder zumindest im Entferntesten nachvollziehbar kann es sein, dass die beiden irgendwann zueinander finden sollen?“

Nicht viel später wurde mir klar, dass der Krieg andere Geschichten schreibt, andere Gesetze hat. Dass er Menschen zu Wesen macht, die jegliche Hemmung verlieren, andere zu quälen, zu missbrauchen und zu töten. Und doch quillt aus jeder Zeile das übermächtige Verlangen nach Liebe und Geborgenheit hervor, die Grundbedürfnisse eines jeden Menschen, die sich trotz dieser grauenvollen Verrohung immer wieder an die Oberfläche drängen.

Die Beschreibung, wie Vadim und Dan sich allmählich einander nähern und ganz langsam das gegenseitige Misstrauen verlieren, geht wirklich unter die Haut. Man fühlt und leidet mit ihnen, freut sich mit ihnen, wenn sie wieder einen Meilenstein überwinden. Und was für ein holpriger Weg das ist. Wie oft retten sie sich gegenseitig das Leben? Wie oft riskieren sie ihr eigenes für den anderen? Und das trotz der enormen Kluft zwischen ihnen? Schließlich schreiben wir noch Anfang der Achtziger, der kalte Krieg ist noch im vollen Gange, Deutschland wird noch durch die Mauer geteilt und jeder westlich davon (mich eingeschlossen) identifiziert alles, was aus dem Osten kommt, mit Synonymen wie „die rote Armee“, „KGB“ oder „Der eiserne Vorhang".

Aber sie schaffen es, überwinden irgendwie jede Hürde, nähern sich immer mehr dem anderen und lassen Gefühle zu, von denen sie selbst nicht wussten, dass es sie gibt. Insbesondere Dan tut sich hier mehr als schwer. Verständlicherweise wegen der anfänglichen Vergewaltigung, aber man hat während des ganzen Buches den Eindruck, dass Vadim viel weniger Probleme hat, sich diese Gefühle einzugestehen und zuzulassen. Man lernt den warmherzigen russischen „Jungen“ kennen, der voller Liebe an seine Familie daheim denkt, spürt die Sehnsucht nach ihnen.

Ganz furchtbar finde ich, unter welchen Umständen gerade die russischen Soldaten in Afghanistan existieren. Sie werden nicht vernünftig versorgt, nicht einmal Vadim, der einen recht hohen Rang hat. Dan's Eiweißriegel erweisen sich als sein persönlicher Himmel. :)

Ich könnte noch so viel schreiben, will aber nicht weiter abschweifen. Wer M/M mag, starke Nerven hat – Leute, das ist nichts für 'the faint of heart' – lest diese außergewöhnliche Story über zwei Männer, die 'against all odds' am Ende dieses ersten Teils immer noch leben (allein das ist ein Wunder für sich, denn WAS kann ein Mensch alles ertragen?)und das Bedürfnis, sich gegenseitig umzubringen hinter sich gelassen haben. Ob daraus noch Liebe wird?

Ich habe Band II der Soldiers bereits zu lesen angefangen und weiß hoffentlich bald meine eigene Frage zu beantworten. :)

4,5 Sterne für ein ganz außerordentliches Buch!

Warum nicht 5 Sterne? Ganz ehrlich, stellenweise wurde mir das Buch etwas lang. Ich habe vor allem im letzten Drittel immer wieder gegen das Bedürfnis ankämpfen müssen, einige Seiten zu überfliegen. Ich habe mich davon abhalten können, aber für mich hätten es 100 Seiten weniger wahrscheinlich auch getan.

[Heller · Rating 5 out of 5]

It's not often that I read a book that just grabs me and keeps me under its spell until I'm compelled to finish it. I felt that with this book.

It was so brutal and sometimes so insanely intense that I had to look away from the page to compose myself before heading back into the fray.

The setting for this story is Afgahanistan during the Soviet intervention and runs over the subsequent withdrawl from the country.
It's 10 years in the life of Dan McFayden, a Scottish SAS soldier and Vadim Krasnorada, a Soviet Spetsnaz soldier.

I know I keep using the word brutal but I cannot really find a better word to describe the first meeting of these men. This is not a pretty book and these characters are hardened killers who live by the sword. They're in the middle of a war and they are soldiers doing their jobs. Gruesome ugly things happen here but what fascinates me with this book and these characters is that despite living on the edge of sanity they manage over time to develop such loyality and love for each other. This is what kept pulling my eye back to page again and again.

I've read some really fascinating reviews for this book that are better able to articulate what an amazing piece of work it is so I'll keep this to my impressions. I know that even despite the horrors of the war surrounding them the love story of these two men, and yes it is a love story, was one of the most beautiful relationships that I think I've ever read. Maybe because they were immersed in war that every moment of kindness and gentleness was magnified for me and made it all that much dearer. I can't really say. I do know that I'll have trouble moving on the next phases of their story. This book was all kinds of perfect for me and I want to savour it for a long time before I see where the journey of these two warriors heads to next.

This is a recommended read but with reservations. There are graphic representations of war here. Every horror that you could think of finds itself onto these pages so you need to be prepared. Go into this with eyes open and you will be gifted with a story that will leave an indelible impression on you. Fascinating, revulsive and undeniably gorgeous.

[Lisa *-* GiViNg It To YoU * LoCk StOcK & TwO SmOkiNg BaRrELs · Rating 5 out of 5]

Updated Jan 2015

Without Doubt My All Time Favourite Book Ever



TWO ENEMY SOLDIERS......HATRED. LUST. FUCKED UP EMOTION.



When I managed to unclench my fists and my gut stopped churning at the raw brutality of this story and it progressed I found myself addicted to Dan & Vadim.

The man was like a tropical thunderstorm, he thought. The very heart of thunderstorms, not the rumble and flash, but a proper, all encompassing, world-will-end thunderstorm.

Filled with Want. Need. Longing.

I am now left bereft

Wanting. Needing. Longing for more.....

[Martin · Rating 5 out of 5]

I can't believe how lucky I am with my books recently. So many went straight to my favorites list and this one is actually so good that I consider making an 'Extreme Favorite' list or something just to distinguish it from the other books I liked, but which were nowhere close to the quality, depth and emotions that 'Special Forces: Soldiers' had.

I read the full Soldiers book (the Director's Cut) and I gotta tell you, it's not what you might expect from a m/m romance book. Not at all. At least in the beginning (a beginning which is longer than many full novels in the genre).
It's cruel, merciless, violent. It's war in Afghanistan. I think that alone sums it up.

Dan is a British SAS soldier, training the Afghan tribes to fight 'guerilla' style against the Russian invaders. He's not officially in Afghanistan - just like the Western countries aren't officially involved in the Afghanistan war that the Russians led in the 1980s.

Vadim is an ex-pentathlete who even participated in the Olympic Games, but wasn't good enough to make it big in the sports world. He was recruited by the Soviet Army and became a soldier, starting the book as a Captain of his Spetznaz group in Afghanistan. He's also an agent/hit man for the Russian Ministry of Internal Affairs, killing Russian traitors who have fled to the West.



9 years of their lives are portrayed in the first volume called 'Soldiers', covering the period from 1980 to 1989.

These guys start off really badly. I mean REALLY badly.
Or as the author puts it so aptly:

One rape. One torture. Accounts settled.

This book felt like a grimoire that makes characters appear for real when you read the lines. Reading this was an overwhelming (at times painful) experience. But I have hardly ever felt this much for a book, nor had a book invade my real life in such a desperate way....

Just a few impressions of moments that really touched me:

“Vadim.” Who are you—who am I? Alive, dead? Body moving towards the hand, seeking protection from the shadows. Nameless terror, but he’d be safe under the wings of the broad-shouldered demon. Remembered the hair. That name. Recognition of something deep, profound, reaching to a level where conscious thoughts didn’t matter. “Protect me.” Big words—small voice.

This book also had the first fisting scene that I ever read in m/m romance and to my surprise it was used in a VERY interesting way and didn't really freak me out.
It was hard work for me wrapping my mind around the concept, but at least Vadim also felt kinda awkward mentioning it, LOL:

Vadim placed a kiss on that forehead, much like he would kiss Anoushka. “Yes.” How to explain what he’d done? Better not. “Needed to...ah.” No delicate way of putting it. “Uhm. Give you focus.” He winced. That sounded bad.

The constant threat of being separated by death forever was never far from their minds, either:

“If I’m unlucky, and if you find my body, will you bury it? Some rocks would do, I can’t stand the thought of being eaten by carrion. As if that mattered, eh? I’d be fucking dead.” Dan shrugged before tossing a grin towards Vadim, making light of a far-too-heavy situation.

How to say 'I love you' without using the words - Dan's specialty:

“You’re as close to a fucking home as I get.”

“You could betray and kill me now and I wouldn’t give a shit as long as you stayed close until I died.”

Near the bottom, a substantial pack of Durex condoms, in a gaudy packet that flaunted a red sports car. Ironic, really, but he’d heard of ‘the curse of the perverts’ by now, tales of AIDS that decimated Western gays.

This book also dealt with a character overcoming the trauma of a rape situation and actually getting involved with the guy who raped him. A first for me in my books:

He’d never kissed a man; never in his whole life. Except...a kiss of death six years ago. Another first and last and always for--from Vadim. A rape—a kiss.

“Funny,” Dan murmured at long last, “it’s another first today.” He paused, “You seem to be the one for firsts,” his breath caught, “and lasts and always.”

Love may really conquer everything - and turn hatred to love:

“You...” just you, always you. My Russian cunt, my enemy, my comrade, my prisoner, my gaoler and my life. Words, unthinking. “Love...you.”

(By the way, the word 'cunt' appears 124 times on almost 700 pages. Dan, I just love you ;-)

Remembering those words. Love you. His lips moved into a smile, relieved, glad, no, worse than that. Better. I do, too. Shit, I do. Dan didn’t realise he was nodding off, despite the wetness. Wrapped around and inside Vadim, he fell asleep.


He took Dan’s hand, pulled the tasbih out and placed it on Dan’s palm. Prayer beads. He didn’t care much for the symbol, as he didn’t believe in God, and even less the more he fought them, the so-called soldiers of Allah, who knew what name they called him. But he did like the stone. Afghan lapis, dark blue, with specks of gold. “Found this at the market.” Sent one to Katya. Fuck. Katya and Dan. The two people that kept him sane.


“Your family.” Dan forced himself to look at it, didn’t want to see the face of the children, let alone the wife. This person who had some sort of rights over Vadim, who would know if he had died, while he was nothing, no one. An enemy without access to any information. Vadim turned the photo and pointed at the hand writing. His address in Moscow. “Just if anything happens."

Shut the fuck up, Russkie, pretend this world is not a shithole full of death and destruction, and come with me to stay and sleep in a real bed with starched linens and wake to sunshine in your face and the smell of a proper Scottish breakfast.

The smell and taste of his ‘enemy’s’ body, and the way Vadim kissed him and made him human. His home. Afghanistan was his home. You’re my home. I will find you.

This book also had two great female characters. I totally bow to these ladies: Katya, Vadim's wife, and The British Ambassador in Afghanistan, Margaret de Vilde.

“Ma’am, there is nowhere else for me to go.” Because I love a Russian, because I gave my word I’d be back. “ I’ve been in Afghanistan for seven years.” Because this is private, because it is none of your business.


“He spared my life. He did not kill me when he should have. I asked for mercy, and he gave me my life. My wife and children did not lose me on that day, because he did not pull trigger on me.”


He squeezed the hand again, turned, left, sat down on the bench, and cried, cried with the fear and the sadness and the pain, too tired to do anything but cry, didn’t even have the strength to tell the nurse to wake him up in an hour, couldn’t waste the time, needed to speak to Dan. Leaned against the wall and cried like a boy losing his family.

And no, it's not a happy ending, but the beginning of a new challenge in their lives:

Dan didn’t want to say anything, but the words were unstoppable. “I fucking love you. Don’t leave me. You’ve got to find me.” Again, fucking tears. Vadim shook his head, then pressed his face into the crook of Dan’s shoulder, hoped to hide his weakness and felt like a man condemned to die. “I will...find you. If it’s the last thing I’ll do, I’ll come back. Nothing will stop me.”

Some scenes in this story were really extremely unbearable for me, the worst being the Afghan warriors gutting the young German soldier, whom Dan mercifully shot in the head to save him from the wrath of his own men who he could no longer control. The worst of it is that this is probably not even too far from the truth in a war.

I can only recommend this book. I cannot believe it is actually free. The writing is superb, the editing is flawless. This epic story deserves all the praise it gets. 5 stars just because there are no more stars available. It probably deserves 10 or more ;-)

[Sara · Rating 5 out of 5]

Um.. I stumbled across this book in a list and saw the unreal rating and thought to myself "no book is THAT good.." and even more when I found out it was given away free, being a capitalist I tend to stray towards you get what you pay for. So I set out to prove all the reviews wrong.. OH BOY, I was the one who got proven wrong. This story feels so real, it's gritty, raw, brutal and left me feeling like I'd had a one to one with Mike Tyson internally. I have read M/M before but never where the relationship felt this potent and again real. The romance isn't forced or all butterflies and rainbows it's so much more potent and you can feel deep down to your toes. I have just started the directors cut of the second book and it's not disappointing so far, it has left me with a football size lump in my throat all day and I can't wait to pick it back up again tonight.

In hindsight, the author is a genius giving these away free, now I'm guaranteed to buy anything else he has and will write! ;)

And here is how I see them in my mind.. no matter how old haggard and scarred they get!

[Lisa Arbitrary - AttentionIsArbitrary M/M Blog · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think my original read was of the unedited version. But here I've read (or reread) the polished version. Just as eye opening, gut wrenching and life-invading as the first time. But with new understanding, yet just as many questions.

Straight on to Part II

BTW, this is one of the rare occasions that GR needs more stars. Many, many more.

[Emanuela ~plastic duck~ · Rating 5 out of 5]

Not a review, just pouring my heart out after the first 11 chapters of Soldiers.

How long does it take for two rocks to collide until they're shaped to fit against each other? This is probably one of the most physical books I've read, not only because the two characters express each other through and their relationship is shaped by their physical encounters - from rape through fighting to sex which borders very much to making love even if they don't know it yet - but also because the writing is very much intense, what is just in the mind of the characters is only a period and a quote away from what is spoken. You never know whether the words will leak through the barrier of rationality, whether they'll spill into their voice.

You can't read this book and relax, because you slowly start to invest in the story. After 11 chapters I can tell that: I made peace with Vadim. He is so tough and strong and resilient on the outside, but there's this insecurity inside him that makes him so complicated. Maybe it's not insecurity, it's fragility. Whatever. Dan is exploiting this crack in Vadim's armor and enjoying it. Maybe not really enjoying it, I think he's using it as an excuse to justify his attraction, because I can't believe at this point he is only feeling lust. He's addicted to Vadim.

I don't think their relationship is balanced yet. I love how they have to give to take and the taking and giving yield more lust and desire, but Dan has to surrender a bit more. The Nothing still makes him stall, so I'm wondering when he will go over it eventually.

As I said in my comments, I have never read two more Alpha guys. What I like is the way they short-circuit around each other. When they are together logic and training fly out of the window and they are there, more naked than naked, stripped raw. It's difficult to say who has the upper hand, because it's true that Vadim lets himself be used by Dan, but Dan seems the one who is compelled to go to Vadim, to have him. I love love love how their feelings for each other - lust, hate, comradeship - make them think less clearly and how they exploit each other's weaknesses in turns.

I am using Vadim's words to Darren in the last chapter I read: to be able to go over Dan's torture he had to yield. At this point of their story he is still yielding, but not to have his life spared, but to keep Dan close, to leave the door open to have him like he wants him. I don't know if Vadim realizes how much power he has yet, even if Dan is probably in control. So the last chapter, with the 1984 's excerpts was incredibly revealing and maybe poetic. I don't know if I really understood all the shades of that part of the story, I'm still elaborating.

[Christina · Rating 5 out of 5]

So I've been debating whether or not to review this book because I don't think I have the proper words to do it justice but I'm going to give it a shot. Special Forces: Soldiers is the first book in the series, followed Mercenaries I, Mercenaries II, and Veterans. It's probably one of the best books I have ever read.

People call it Epic and I agree there is no other word to describe it. This is a roller coaster of a ride. Don't expect to read this and not run the gamut of emotions. It is intense! This is a story about Vadim Krasnorada, a Soviet Spetsnaz soldier and Dan McFadyen, a Scottish SAS soldier who meet as enemies during the Cold War in Afghanistan. It is a raw look at their ever-changing relationship spanning over 10 years. A relationship based on violence and horrific pain. I felt like I was side by side with these two men. You feel their emotions and the atmosphere surrounding them, the extremity of it all. The harshness of the desert and the beauty they find in the mountains.

Their story, their lives, ripped throw my heart like no other. Make no mistake, this book is brutal, they are in the midst of war and nothing is held back. It deals with difficult subject matters, including rape, physical and mental torture, isolation, loneliness, lust but what develops from this is simply AMAZING. Once enemies, they learn to trust and rely on each other and they developed respect and love for one another. During the first quarter of the book I wasn't able to even grasp how these two men could move forward without feeling anything but utter hatred and then slowly things change and by 3/4 of the book I was amazed at the transformation.

I highly recommend this book but we warned you will live and breathe Vadim and Dan and expect an intense ride.

[Lou~❧Powerless Over 1-Click❧ · Rating 5 out of 5]

OMG...
I have officially flipped ... cried ... and snotted. What a fantastic, tragic, realistic, fascinating, gutwrenching, mesmerizing, brutally violent, heartstoppingly sad, thought-provoking, unbelievably romantic, and emotionally draining story of war, honor, survival, and most of all love. And that was just Part 1. I want to read the next book, Special Forces - Mercenaries Part I immediately, but I can't because I have other challenges and BRs. DAMMIT!

Here's my soundtrack for first time Dan and Vadim make love :

https://youtu.be/_Q2rZb7E0EY

I wish my rating could be ★★★★★★!

[Lelyana's Reviews · Rating 5 out of 5]

***Spoiler alert!***

5 heartbreaking-f***ed my brain- stars!

“Give me your word, you will live for me, whatever happens. Even if I never see you again. I need to believe that somewhere, out there,you are alive.”

One rape



One kiss



One blow job



One shot



One making love

"“Don’t.” No. Fuck, yes. No. Fuck! “Don’t stop.” Truth was a bitch without tits.
“Wouldn’t want to get killed for this, you know.”
“Won’t.” Dan pushed his hips back, into the face, hands gripping the stone slab with white knuckles. “Will if you stop.”"

Then came TLC



Years of brutality, tortured, pain, separation, blood, war, denials, denials, denials....

..and the deepest love of two human being ever been.

“You...” just you, always you. My Russian cunt, my enemy, my comrade, my prisoner, my gaoler and my life.
Words, unthinking. “Love...you.”

One unsecured future



I didn't even know how to review this book. Dan and Vadim, wear my blood.
They're not supposed to meet, or did they?
Since the day the 'met' on that alley...their life never be the same again ever since.

One rapist. One torturer. Enemy. Lovers.

"“I want you, Dan. More than anything.
You...are in my blood, in my bones, I need...you. Do you understand.”"

"“No, I have no home anymore.” Dan’s hand stopped Vadim from turning
over fully, fingers digging into the muscular thigh. “Not my brother’s family.
Nowhere to send the body to. Forget it.” His grip tightened while he moved closer.
“You’re as close to a fucking home as I get.”"

"“Don’t leave me.” I need you.
I love you. And all that other fucking shit that I used to laugh about, a lifetime ago. “Don’t...leave me. Can’t bear…”
Vadim kept that hand in both of his, held it, would have killed to have Dan rest at his side, relaxing, at ease again. “I’m not leaving, Dan. I’m here.”"

"“We be…together. More than just…few...hours. Wanna die…with you. Not…alone.”
Tiredness threatening to drag him under again. Fought to stay awake, needed to spend every second with Vadim while he could.
Vadim kissed that hand again, looked up. “We won’t die. We’ll never die. I promise.”

”

“You’re perfect, Dan. I can feel your pain.”
Dan didn’t answer, his mouth filled with bloodied fabric, but his eyes were wide open. Nostrils flaring with his frantic breathing, and fuck, it hurt, hurt just like the memory, but this time for different reasons. It was what he needed, the fighting, the violent thrashing against the overpowering weight and strength. Andmost of all the illusion that he was helpless. Perfect. Fucking perfect, even those
tears of pain, creating damp patches on the soiled bed.
Everything, simply perfect..”

Should I hate them? Maybe yes. maybe not.
It's what there are, it's what hey made of. It's what they're purposed in life.
Their part in life, was just not pretty. It's ugly.
But they survived somehow. They hurt each other painfully, they hurt people they loved dearly.
But who can resist love..or lust?
Is there any different between love and lust...?
I dunno...in Vadim and Dan's world, love and lost are mingled...no boundaries...

This one is the best I have ever read from Aleksandr Voinov...
This book fucked with my brain.


JUST F***IN' READ IT!

[Mel · Rating 5 out of 5]

note: This is the review for the edited version of Soldiers.

Despite all the upcoming praise, this review won’t do the book justice. Not by far. But I’m still going to try and explain why and how much I liked this story.

It was FANTASTIC! Mind-boggling. Brutal. Horrific. Amazing. Sweet. Heart rending. Most of all: it was intense. One can’t read this book without being affected by it.
Vadim and Dan capture you from the very beginning. And not in any charming and fluffy way. These men are tough, hardened. They are soldiers, survivors. They do the most horrible things to each other. Rape, torture, violence. In fact: when reading all that brutality, you just can’t imagine that there will ever be anything but hate between the two men.
But then: slowly, gradually, there’s a shift. Respect, understanding, trust and finally: love.

This book is not for the faint hearted. It’s brutal and raw. You’ll be reading most parts with a knot in your stomach. But you’ll also be rewarded with a wonderfully engaging and beautiful love story about two –seemingly- very different men, from two different worlds, finding each other against all odds.

Soldiers is the first part of the Special Forces saga which spans 25 years in Dan and Vadim’s life. Having been on the roller coaster journey for their first 10, I can’t wait to see what happens in the next books: Mercenaries Part I, Mercenaries Part II and Veterans.

[Taylor · Rating 5 out of 5]

It's a long journey to redemption. Soldier up for the ride.

I picked up this story expecting it to break me. I thought I was prepared. I was so very wrong. By page fifteen, I wanted to throw my iPad out the fucking window. I didn't think I would be able to relate to these characters, or get over the gut wrenching start to the book. I kept going only because I trusted in my GR friends, and if anything, I had to see how in the hell it would all come together.

Soon, I realized I had to take myself, all my judgements, and preconceived notions out of the equation. Because it's not my story, it's theirs. Once I accepted the fact that they might be flawed and broken characters, but that I didn't have to relate to them - only try to understand, I finished one of the most beautiful stories I've ever read.

Saying this book is intense would be a gross understatment. While most stories provide some sort of repreive admist the drama, this story does not. It is in your face and twisting your guts on almost every one of the 650 pages. The strange thing is, you'll like it. Trust.

I feel wrecked after finishing this, and I can't even imagine immediately picking up Part 2 right now. I will be reading it though, oh yes. I am now a slave to Voinov, life ruiner that he is.