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The Distinguished Guest
This profound and moving story of a mother and son, written by the author of "The Good Mother", touches the deepest concerns about love, art, family, and life.
272 pages, Paperback
Published January 8, 1999
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About the author
Sue Miller
59 books939 followersLibrarian Note: There is more than one author in the GoodReads database with this name. See this thread for more information.
Sue Miller is an American novelist and short story writer who has written a number of best-selling novels. She graduated from Radcliffe College.
Sue Miller is an American novelist and short story writer who has written a number of best-selling novels. She graduated from Radcliffe College.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 184 reviews
July 8, 2024
Not my favourite Sue Miller, but still great writing, and able to see into a human heart. Lily is in her 70s and has Parkinsons. She's a famous memoirist who has a view on the Black civil rights movement in America, and is currently living with her son, Alan and his wife. Visiting is Linnet, a journalist, writing a piece on Lily. There are a lot of high-brow conversations about what went on in Lily's church when she was first married, and it felt as though Alan's view of her, and the fame of her memoir hinged around that, but it just wasn't controversial enough to drive the present-day story for me. 3.5 stars.
October 9, 2018
My signed copy holds marginalia, checks and exclamation points, some notes. But surprisingly, no personal reflections on the many connections with my own life: the central male character boasts my own first name, and he lives on a river flowing into Buzzards Bay, as I do; he teaches at a small art school, as I did one course at Swain in New Bedford; his father was a minister doing good work with minorities, as has my reverend brother, though in the book Alan’s dad lost his church because he befriended gang-members. When the architect Alan goes to Boston, he recalls living in a garret on Newbury Street, which features art galleries my artist wife and I have visited several times a year. From Newbury Street they looked out front to the “plywood days of the Hancock,” when all the huge glass panes were falling out, not designed for the sway of the building. (p.78)
The distinguished guest, Alan’s mother Lily is no fragile flower; she dumped his dad when he lost his church, she thought foolishly, by befriending young black gang-members. Late in life, at 72, she becomes a famous author of her feminist memoir. Miller gives Lily’s memoir some of the best writing in the book. Lily’s writing success comes despite not finishing college, because her father withdrew her from Vassar when she voted for F. D. Roosevelt over Hoover.
Miller often chooses an unexpected, perfect word, as in “Every time she opened the refrigerator, a knife of light slashed into the room” or later, “laundry strung neatly on a line—black tights, two pairs of white underpants—glowing flags in the dawn” (121). Many times this twenty year old book states what I feel this week, “Alan had talked the Admundsens out of turning the meadow into a lawn, and into the ease of keeping it wild, mowing it a couple times a summer” (101). Just this summer near my river onto Buzzards Bay, a dozen local houses with trees and a four acre field have been bought by suburbanites who chop down the trees and birdcover, and dig up the meadow, plant grass, and poison weeds, despite their being on wells where they will drink the poison someday. To me it seems plain dumb, not to mention helping the planet to die.
Alan likes the Boston gulls, circling, though they would land on Newbury Street “outside the mansard windows, huge and ugly, primordial, a nightmare version of bird. And then flew off into grace again.” (249) Once we had a London gull steal cheese off the stone window sill of our fourth floor room on Cromwell Road.
Alan’s mother accepts two last interviewers: one stays for weeks as a sort of “amanuensis” (Lily’s word) in order to find insights missing from previous interviews in major magazines like The New Yorker and Time; the other stays one afternoon and focuses on Lily’s and her ex’s Chicago church and its integration, including the Bible group turned women’s group (one of the first). She is very interested in various dialects used by Blacks and Whites, as a Black scholar, writing her Ph.D. Alan comes to new insights about his mother, in fact one a revelation from this scholar, who knew one of the women in Lily’s group back before she divorced. But he still resents his mother’s dominance and rejection of his own experience, including his boyhood friends and enemies who were black.
The distinguished guest, Alan’s mother Lily is no fragile flower; she dumped his dad when he lost his church, she thought foolishly, by befriending young black gang-members. Late in life, at 72, she becomes a famous author of her feminist memoir. Miller gives Lily’s memoir some of the best writing in the book. Lily’s writing success comes despite not finishing college, because her father withdrew her from Vassar when she voted for F. D. Roosevelt over Hoover.
Miller often chooses an unexpected, perfect word, as in “Every time she opened the refrigerator, a knife of light slashed into the room” or later, “laundry strung neatly on a line—black tights, two pairs of white underpants—glowing flags in the dawn” (121). Many times this twenty year old book states what I feel this week, “Alan had talked the Admundsens out of turning the meadow into a lawn, and into the ease of keeping it wild, mowing it a couple times a summer” (101). Just this summer near my river onto Buzzards Bay, a dozen local houses with trees and a four acre field have been bought by suburbanites who chop down the trees and birdcover, and dig up the meadow, plant grass, and poison weeds, despite their being on wells where they will drink the poison someday. To me it seems plain dumb, not to mention helping the planet to die.
Alan likes the Boston gulls, circling, though they would land on Newbury Street “outside the mansard windows, huge and ugly, primordial, a nightmare version of bird. And then flew off into grace again.” (249) Once we had a London gull steal cheese off the stone window sill of our fourth floor room on Cromwell Road.
Alan’s mother accepts two last interviewers: one stays for weeks as a sort of “amanuensis” (Lily’s word) in order to find insights missing from previous interviews in major magazines like The New Yorker and Time; the other stays one afternoon and focuses on Lily’s and her ex’s Chicago church and its integration, including the Bible group turned women’s group (one of the first). She is very interested in various dialects used by Blacks and Whites, as a Black scholar, writing her Ph.D. Alan comes to new insights about his mother, in fact one a revelation from this scholar, who knew one of the women in Lily’s group back before she divorced. But he still resents his mother’s dominance and rejection of his own experience, including his boyhood friends and enemies who were black.
January 5, 2009
The Distinguished Guest was my first, no doubt too long in coming, dip into the work of bestselling author, Sue Miller. Within the first few pages, indeed, first few lines, I had to wonder what had taken me so long to make this discovery for myself. Here was a literary talent, wide and deep, for the discerning reader. The pages turned if not with great speed, then certainly relish, in the manner that one approaches a gourmet meal rather than a buffet.
The novel centers around aging writer, Lily Maynard, having achieved literary fame in her 70s with her frank memoirs of a failed marriage to a priest, along with riveting fiction that explored racial issues. Lily has Parkinson’s disease, and we witness how her faculties fail her as her short but bright writing career comes to an end. Her memory no longer holds the threads of plot and storyline, her mind wanders, her hands can no longer hold a pen. She takes up residence at her son’s home, what is to be a temporary stay while awaiting an opening at a nursing home, but becomes her final residence. We learn about her through her interactions, strained as they can be, with her son and daughter-in-law, through an on-going interview with a journalist, and various other characters, casual or scholarly, that come in and out of her life in her final days.
All of which are fascinating, and Miller here shows herself to be a master of walking the literary tightrope with admirable balance. Never too much, never too little, always dead center, straight up and on target. Miller understands the concept of “less is more” and uses it to best advantage. Some of Miller’s best writing, in fact, I found to be her voice coming through Lily’s:
“In those summer Sundays of our new marriage, I could sometimes experience the hour or so in church as a kind of drug, a near-aphrodisiac really. All my senses were dilated by it, by the gradual and powerful accumulation of layers of physical awareness combined with my own spiritual hunger, my greed, really. The Midwest heat outside was always intense by eleven o’clock, and the dark little church was cool and damp by contrast. When you entered the doors, there was a long, dizzying moment of welcome blindness, accompanied, for me, by a near-sexual weakening in my legs. The air inside smelled deliciously of mildew, a mushroomy, earthy odor that changed slowly as the space filled up with people…
“I always arrived early because I couldn’t bear the idea of the eyes of the congregation on me as I walked to my place alone. The young minister’s new wife…”
Miller guides us with expertise to see the subtle nuances of young growing old, of the slow and frustrating, almost shameful, ravages of disease, of the disconnect between family members, of the limitations of pride, and the sly cruelties between mother and son, and those, too, between husband and wife. Here is family like most families, with truths being hidden and half-hidden, games played and unwound, mild flirtations that hint of ruination, yet hold back just in time. It is as if almost nothing happens—only everything does.
Even the conclusion of this story is laced with nuance, as life often is, so that it can be seen both as tragic and yet right, if one steps just to one side of it. There is good and bad and all the shades between in all that is life and all that is death.
The novel centers around aging writer, Lily Maynard, having achieved literary fame in her 70s with her frank memoirs of a failed marriage to a priest, along with riveting fiction that explored racial issues. Lily has Parkinson’s disease, and we witness how her faculties fail her as her short but bright writing career comes to an end. Her memory no longer holds the threads of plot and storyline, her mind wanders, her hands can no longer hold a pen. She takes up residence at her son’s home, what is to be a temporary stay while awaiting an opening at a nursing home, but becomes her final residence. We learn about her through her interactions, strained as they can be, with her son and daughter-in-law, through an on-going interview with a journalist, and various other characters, casual or scholarly, that come in and out of her life in her final days.
All of which are fascinating, and Miller here shows herself to be a master of walking the literary tightrope with admirable balance. Never too much, never too little, always dead center, straight up and on target. Miller understands the concept of “less is more” and uses it to best advantage. Some of Miller’s best writing, in fact, I found to be her voice coming through Lily’s:
“In those summer Sundays of our new marriage, I could sometimes experience the hour or so in church as a kind of drug, a near-aphrodisiac really. All my senses were dilated by it, by the gradual and powerful accumulation of layers of physical awareness combined with my own spiritual hunger, my greed, really. The Midwest heat outside was always intense by eleven o’clock, and the dark little church was cool and damp by contrast. When you entered the doors, there was a long, dizzying moment of welcome blindness, accompanied, for me, by a near-sexual weakening in my legs. The air inside smelled deliciously of mildew, a mushroomy, earthy odor that changed slowly as the space filled up with people…
“I always arrived early because I couldn’t bear the idea of the eyes of the congregation on me as I walked to my place alone. The young minister’s new wife…”
Miller guides us with expertise to see the subtle nuances of young growing old, of the slow and frustrating, almost shameful, ravages of disease, of the disconnect between family members, of the limitations of pride, and the sly cruelties between mother and son, and those, too, between husband and wife. Here is family like most families, with truths being hidden and half-hidden, games played and unwound, mild flirtations that hint of ruination, yet hold back just in time. It is as if almost nothing happens—only everything does.
Even the conclusion of this story is laced with nuance, as life often is, so that it can be seen both as tragic and yet right, if one steps just to one side of it. There is good and bad and all the shades between in all that is life and all that is death.
July 6, 2010
I found this to be an interesting story, but a fairly annoying read from a stylistic point of view - too much changing of tense, too much passive voice. I can understand her use of passive voice as a way of illustrating that the narrator feels acted upon rather than active; but a reader shouldn't be able to detect it so readily. Also, the conceit of Lily's Parkinson's rather than an inheritance of her father's Alzheimer's doesn't ring true. While you could fault a general lack of understanding about the nature of neurological disease when the book was written, it highlights the fact that Miller's narratives rely on characters and situations plucked straight from the writer's imagination to serve a predetermined structure, whether or not they ring true.
Interesting themes run throughout: perspectives on the civil rights movement, the notion that you can never really know the heart of a person, that people can inherit traits that transcend nurture and one's own free will; but the characters' persistent ruminations and the stupid, obligatory sex scenes make much of this book skimmable.
Interesting themes run throughout: perspectives on the civil rights movement, the notion that you can never really know the heart of a person, that people can inherit traits that transcend nurture and one's own free will; but the characters' persistent ruminations and the stupid, obligatory sex scenes make much of this book skimmable.
March 18, 2014
At 72 Lily finds literary fame after publishing her memoir. She appears to have been a polarizing woman with strong views on racial integration, religion and marriage. Her writings are offerings of her paradigm and little interest or understanding of those to whom she is genetically related. As the story meanders along I develop a somewhat detached relationship with her the protagonist - in fact I don't think I like her and to be honest I can't tell if I am supposed to or not? It is with the secondary characters that I fuse and feel a fondness towards. These are the ones that keep me turning the pages particularly her son Alan who is uncomfortable with the bare all nature of her writings, his wife Gaby a sure bodied French women with a great back story, the fragile journalist Linnett trying to get a unique angle on Lily, and finally her grandson Thomas who is just a bit quirky for favor or popularity. They all become more than Lily and I suspect it is because they project a need from others which Lily does not.
This is a story of how the business of living day to day gets mired in our own perception and personal agenda. Yet when we stop and look in the rearview mirror we discover just how much we missed of our nearest and dearest needs and their rationale for why they did what they did. Often it is the obvious cues that are missed and once lost create life long misconceptions with unfortunate consequence. The truth is often only reveled once that person is no longer with us - fascinating stuff and for some duller than watching paint dry I know. But for me I am endlessly fascinated with these subtle nuances both in my own reality and fictional attempts to figure this stuff out. So when an author can bring them alive for me and do justice to it I am delighted. Sue Miller writes very beautifully and I enjoy her particular style of laying relationships down for me to examine and mull over this was no exception.
This is a story of how the business of living day to day gets mired in our own perception and personal agenda. Yet when we stop and look in the rearview mirror we discover just how much we missed of our nearest and dearest needs and their rationale for why they did what they did. Often it is the obvious cues that are missed and once lost create life long misconceptions with unfortunate consequence. The truth is often only reveled once that person is no longer with us - fascinating stuff and for some duller than watching paint dry I know. But for me I am endlessly fascinated with these subtle nuances both in my own reality and fictional attempts to figure this stuff out. So when an author can bring them alive for me and do justice to it I am delighted. Sue Miller writes very beautifully and I enjoy her particular style of laying relationships down for me to examine and mull over this was no exception.
April 13, 2012
Lily is a difficult person, especially for her son, a middle-aged architect. We see her from various perspectives, including her own in excerpts from her memoir, and that of Linnett, a journalist interviewing her for a profile in The New Yorker. Not a plot-driven novel, but one with subtle insights unto human relationships.
February 18, 2019
“It is probably fair to ask to what extent Lily Maynard is conscious of the effect she makes, but it’s not a question you’ll easily find the answer to.”
Lily Roberts Maynard reached literary fame at age seventy-two with The Integrationist: A Spiritual Memoir. She’s had moderate success with various fictional short stories that followed, but nothing to the scale of her memoir. Now Lily, who was once celebrated and sought after, finds herself living in relative seclusion with her architect son, Alan, and his wife as Parkinson’s disease slowly consumes her body and mind. Finding themselves once again under the same roof, both Lily and Alan confront decisions made in the past while trying to find a way to move forward.
This is the third book by Sue Miller that I’ve read (the other two being The World Below and Lost in the Forest) and I continue to find myself underwhelmed with her work. The Distinguished Guest is described as a “moving story of a mother and son”, but in reality, Miller gives us a story of a mother and son…and her late husband…and her deceased parents, as well as a son…and his wife…and his two siblings…and his two sons. Throw in a visiting journalist who has her own messy backstory and you have a novel simply overburdened and overwhelmed with relationships. This might be the reason I have trouble connecting with Miller’s books. She inundates her stories with too many character profiles, backstories, and conflicts that spread the reader’s focus entirely too thin and leave little or nothing left to hold onto. Just as “too many cooks spoil the broth”, Miller gives us far too many relationships that ultimately spoil the story.
I wish I liked this book more since there are several interesting and important issues that Miller encounters head on: race relations, religious faith versus spirituality, social conformity, and infidelity. But these subjects are not enough to lift The Distinguished Guest from its own emotional saturation and social mire. Ayn Rand once said, “If it’s worth doing, it’s worth overdoing.” In this case, a few less cooks would have made for a much more pleasing broth.
Lily Roberts Maynard reached literary fame at age seventy-two with The Integrationist: A Spiritual Memoir. She’s had moderate success with various fictional short stories that followed, but nothing to the scale of her memoir. Now Lily, who was once celebrated and sought after, finds herself living in relative seclusion with her architect son, Alan, and his wife as Parkinson’s disease slowly consumes her body and mind. Finding themselves once again under the same roof, both Lily and Alan confront decisions made in the past while trying to find a way to move forward.
This is the third book by Sue Miller that I’ve read (the other two being The World Below and Lost in the Forest) and I continue to find myself underwhelmed with her work. The Distinguished Guest is described as a “moving story of a mother and son”, but in reality, Miller gives us a story of a mother and son…and her late husband…and her deceased parents, as well as a son…and his wife…and his two siblings…and his two sons. Throw in a visiting journalist who has her own messy backstory and you have a novel simply overburdened and overwhelmed with relationships. This might be the reason I have trouble connecting with Miller’s books. She inundates her stories with too many character profiles, backstories, and conflicts that spread the reader’s focus entirely too thin and leave little or nothing left to hold onto. Just as “too many cooks spoil the broth”, Miller gives us far too many relationships that ultimately spoil the story.
I wish I liked this book more since there are several interesting and important issues that Miller encounters head on: race relations, religious faith versus spirituality, social conformity, and infidelity. But these subjects are not enough to lift The Distinguished Guest from its own emotional saturation and social mire. Ayn Rand once said, “If it’s worth doing, it’s worth overdoing.” In this case, a few less cooks would have made for a much more pleasing broth.
September 25, 2017
This book confused me. On the one hand, the writing style was suburb. The author really developed her characters in terms of personality and physical appearance, and for that reason I somewhat enjoyed it. However, the actual story just didn't capture my attention. It seemed flat to me, never really getting into the substance of the mother/son conflict. The story touched on controversial subjects, but never really tied everything together. I guess it just was not was I was expecting when I picked it up.
September 27, 2020
Miller is an excellent writer, and this book began on a high note. However, halfway through, it dragged with too much narrative on the son, Alan, and his issues. It strayed from the most interesting and main protagonist, Lily. I enjoyed the Chicago setting and the theme of the changing neighborhoods reflecting society during the 50s and 60s.
March 29, 2024
⭐️⭐️⭐️
This is the first book I’ve read written by Sue Miller. The protagonist is an old lady (Lily) who became a famous author at age 70. The time frame (the 90’s) is about ten years after she became famous. Lily is moving in with her architect son and his French wife in New England until an apartment she wants to move into becomes available. There is no defined length of stay because the guy who lives in the apartment needs a bed in a care facility and they’re waiting for someone to die so the guy can get a bed. Lily is suffering from Parkinson’s and she’s not all that nice or easy going. A lot of this book is her son’s inner thoughts and his general dissatisfaction with his mother: her ideals, her coldness.
Suffice it to say, it wasn’t all that compelling to me, it sort of dragged almost from the start. But there was an unexpected twist towards the end that I didn’t see coming.
Based on this book, I’m in no rush to explore any other of the author’s offerings.
The ATY Goodreads Challenge - 2024
Prompt #24- a book with a secondary color on the cover
This is the first book I’ve read written by Sue Miller. The protagonist is an old lady (Lily) who became a famous author at age 70. The time frame (the 90’s) is about ten years after she became famous. Lily is moving in with her architect son and his French wife in New England until an apartment she wants to move into becomes available. There is no defined length of stay because the guy who lives in the apartment needs a bed in a care facility and they’re waiting for someone to die so the guy can get a bed. Lily is suffering from Parkinson’s and she’s not all that nice or easy going. A lot of this book is her son’s inner thoughts and his general dissatisfaction with his mother: her ideals, her coldness.
Suffice it to say, it wasn’t all that compelling to me, it sort of dragged almost from the start. But there was an unexpected twist towards the end that I didn’t see coming.
Based on this book, I’m in no rush to explore any other of the author’s offerings.
The ATY Goodreads Challenge - 2024
Prompt #24- a book with a secondary color on the cover
October 9, 2020
Those of us who read this author know that a Sue Miller has a way with words. She makes the everyday stuff-meals, chores, work, relationships-seem special. I found this story to be so poignant, and to me, the very heart of this story, is the mother-son relationship that is examined. I appreciated the back story about the mother’s relationship with her husband and her church and integrating that church racially, but somehow it did not meld for me. But the relationship between Lily and her son, Alan, was terrific.
July 22, 2020
I had a hard time with this book. Not sure why. Maybe too many characters, or I wasn't connected enough to any one of them enough to care. I have been reading Sue Miller books this year and if I would have started with this one not sure if I would have read more of her work.
Maybe this is a book to try another time in the future.
Maybe this is a book to try another time in the future.
June 8, 2020
An engaging novel about family relationships, aging, grief, and memory. I found it to be very nuanced and, at times, truly touching.
October 15, 2020
I've now read three books by Sue Miller. I'm late to this party but glad I'm here now. I found her latest one, Monogamy--that's how I found her work--a five star book, don't let the title put you off.
Miller is *really* good at dialog and through that dialog, and being within the character's minds, too, she creates 'character prisms' so that I feel I know these people very, very well, like I could guess what they would ethically and morally do in a variety of situations. Listening to the characters interact I'm in awe of what Miller reveals so part of it is like a reading/watching a play as Miller is very good at scene setting.
This particular book delves into mother/adult child relationships, especially with a famous mother, marriages, a bit of childhood, estrangement, getting older, Alzheimers and racism, surprisingly, as it's viewed and spoken about these days of white guilt, 'speaking black,' BLM-talk, except this book was first published in 1995. Ahead of it's time for sure.
Highly recommend!
Miller is *really* good at dialog and through that dialog, and being within the character's minds, too, she creates 'character prisms' so that I feel I know these people very, very well, like I could guess what they would ethically and morally do in a variety of situations. Listening to the characters interact I'm in awe of what Miller reveals so part of it is like a reading/watching a play as Miller is very good at scene setting.
This particular book delves into mother/adult child relationships, especially with a famous mother, marriages, a bit of childhood, estrangement, getting older, Alzheimers and racism, surprisingly, as it's viewed and spoken about these days of white guilt, 'speaking black,' BLM-talk, except this book was first published in 1995. Ahead of it's time for sure.
Highly recommend!
December 13, 2011
I picked up two Sue Miller books for 50 cents each at the book sale at our church's Christmas Fair, this one and "The Senator's Wife." I'm a huge fan of "While I Was Gone" and "The World Below," and I remember thinking "Family Pictures" was a great, if sad, book. But I have to admit I didn't love either of these. Her writing is interesting, but I just did not get interested in the characters as I did in her other books. (At least I didn't despise them, as I did almost everyone in the awful "Lost in the Forest.")
January 21, 2016
I didn't finish this book.
March 7, 2022
This is just the kind of book that I usually like, about the subtleties in the relationships between people, but somehow it never really took off for me.
I didn’t really like any of the characters, and the book wasn’t really focused on any of them in particular, so we had Lily, her son, his wife, and the journalist, with none of them forming the centre of the book.
I also found it irritating that the schism between Lily and her husband, and in the civil rights movement more generally, was alluded to as if it was widely known, but I don’t really know about it. Do Americans?
Maybe it’s also a sign of the times that I wondered whether she was the right person to write about race relations, and I was uncomfortable with the depiction of the one black character.
I didn’t really like any of the characters, and the book wasn’t really focused on any of them in particular, so we had Lily, her son, his wife, and the journalist, with none of them forming the centre of the book.
I also found it irritating that the schism between Lily and her husband, and in the civil rights movement more generally, was alluded to as if it was widely known, but I don’t really know about it. Do Americans?
Maybe it’s also a sign of the times that I wondered whether she was the right person to write about race relations, and I was uncomfortable with the depiction of the one black character.
March 24, 2024
I don’t usually read books twice, in fact this is only the second fiction book I’ve read twice, but reading it now in my early 60’s, having friends with diseases such as ALS and Parkinson’s , and a 92 year old mom was quite different than reading it in my 30’s. Both were enlightening and enjoyable, but my understanding and empathy have grown.
May 9, 2017
At the heart of this sweet novel is Lily Roberts Maynard, a septuagenarian first-time author who surprises herself and her family with her literary abilities. Her most successful work is a memoir which, like all such books is something of a revisionist tale. Her son, Alan, is the other pivotal character, and the relationship between the two is the kernel around which all else builds.
Miller is very skilled at building believable characters and portraying the relationships between them. Her writing is smooth and seemingly effortless. The plot has its twists and a few surprises but, for the most part, is a fairly bland and commonplace story of a dysfunctional family making a go of it. There is nothing offensive or objectionable here, no untoward drama or eye-rolling shift in the narrative.
Neither is there much to excite a reader's awe or interest, though. This is a thoroughly palatable, easily digestible, unobjectionable, worthy literary meal. But nothing here makes me want to come back for seconds.
Miller is very skilled at building believable characters and portraying the relationships between them. Her writing is smooth and seemingly effortless. The plot has its twists and a few surprises but, for the most part, is a fairly bland and commonplace story of a dysfunctional family making a go of it. There is nothing offensive or objectionable here, no untoward drama or eye-rolling shift in the narrative.
Neither is there much to excite a reader's awe or interest, though. This is a thoroughly palatable, easily digestible, unobjectionable, worthy literary meal. But nothing here makes me want to come back for seconds.
November 26, 2018
For me, this novel passed the acid test: its characters came to life. I especially liked the fact that the central character, 72-year-0ld Lily Maynard, is neither hero nor anti-hero. She is both: loathsome and cold as a mother, inspiring and admirable as an early advocate of integration and civil rights, unsentimental and uncompromising in viewing her past, dealing with her Parkinson's, and determining her future. We could dismiss her as a complex character, but I think she offers more than that. In Lily Maynard, Sue Miller has created an individual whose character consists of polar opposites. I've always felt that our American culture, more than others, wants to pigeonhole people into tidy little cubby holes labelled "good"or "bad," when, in fact, most of us are both. In Lily, this dichotomy is more pronounced and makes us question, as do her son Alan, her interviewers Linnett and Marcea, whether coming to a conclusion about Lily is do-able or even worth doing.
October 29, 2010
It is hard to know if Lily, the protagonist of this novel, is a hero or an anti-hero and I suppose that is often inherent in the making of a complicated engrossing character. We meet Lily in her final days and while most of the novel focuses on her rich life, we share Lily's thoughts as she contemplates her death. If death is subject you shy away from pondering, Lily is the perfect vehichle for a gently exposure--a woman who approaches life and now death with srength, fears carefully repressed and certainty.
Miller paints her characters with attention to the small details that reveal great depths. Issues of race, parenthood, availability and relationships are explored and through the lives of these characters small truths revealed.
Miller paints her characters with attention to the small details that reveal great depths. Issues of race, parenthood, availability and relationships are explored and through the lives of these characters small truths revealed.
March 20, 2020
Amazing. Just Amazing.
This is a love-it or hate-it book; all theme and character, little plot. I find myself in my 40's with no idea how I got here and have no desire (or time) to look back and figure it out. However, I often find myself looking to and/or worried about the future. What will my end of life be? What regrets might I have when I know every day I am facing what needs to be done and trying my best? This novel sees the end of a woman's life from many perspectives: her own, her acquaintances who only think they know her, her son's, a stranger's and that of ourselves, the readers of this book. What conclusions do we make of her life? What will people say about us? And really, what will it matter?
This is a love-it or hate-it book; all theme and character, little plot. I find myself in my 40's with no idea how I got here and have no desire (or time) to look back and figure it out. However, I often find myself looking to and/or worried about the future. What will my end of life be? What regrets might I have when I know every day I am facing what needs to be done and trying my best? This novel sees the end of a woman's life from many perspectives: her own, her acquaintances who only think they know her, her son's, a stranger's and that of ourselves, the readers of this book. What conclusions do we make of her life? What will people say about us? And really, what will it matter?
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August 11, 2011I really don't know how I managed to finish reading this book. Perhaps I thought something was going to happen eventually? And when it did it was an anti-climax. There was potential for interesting reading - Alan and Gaby's love story, possible infidelity and some interesting minor characters. But all we get instead is a lot about Lily and pages and pages of her interminable autobiography.
August 20, 2020
At the center of this book is a very complicated character, Lily Maynard. Lily came to writing late, but she has become quite famous and a kind of feminist icon. Now she has Parkinson's disease which results in her coming to live with her youngest son, Alan, and his family. It also makes writing increasingly difficult for her. Her relationship with Alan has always been fraught. Lily was a cold mother, for reasons that are never really explained. She had a close relationship with her own mother so she didn't lack for good models of mothering. But her coldness results in poor relations with all her children (one of whom has cut off all ties, which is also left unexplained): a combination of fury and wanting her approval.
Lily marries Paul when only 19. She sort of hero-worships him until she doesn't. They split up (allegedly) over political differences about how to deal with racism. Lily continues to believe in integration, Paul doesn't. She's very religious, in a fairly conventional way, but also very progressive in her politics. Sometimes she seems very vain and superficial.
Lily is presented as being very witty but also downright mean. We see the meanness but I don't think there are any examples of her being funny or witty. That's a pity as it's always better for a novelist to show her characters' traits as opposed to listing them.
It kept my interest all the way through.
Lily marries Paul when only 19. She sort of hero-worships him until she doesn't. They split up (allegedly) over political differences about how to deal with racism. Lily continues to believe in integration, Paul doesn't. She's very religious, in a fairly conventional way, but also very progressive in her politics. Sometimes she seems very vain and superficial.
Lily is presented as being very witty but also downright mean. We see the meanness but I don't think there are any examples of her being funny or witty. That's a pity as it's always better for a novelist to show her characters' traits as opposed to listing them.
It kept my interest all the way through.
August 30, 2023
Lily Roberts Maynard’s distinguished career began with publication of a first book, a memoir written at age 72, received as a literary triumph and a mature assertion of a brilliant woman’s transcendence and spiritual growth after divorce. Following another productive decade and publication of several well received stories, age and Parkinson’s disease have caught up with Lily. Before her anticipated move to an assisted living facility, while waiting for an apartment to become available, she has become too frail to take care of herself. Hence, her temporary stay in her son’s home, where she arrives with furniture and extensive files. Her son and his wife have engaged a home health attendant, but Lily, who cannot hold a pencil still has plans to continue her wide correspondence, sort her papers, write another story, even entertain guests of her own. Soon Linnett, a journalist seeking an extensive interview with Lily, agrees to serve her as an amanuensis in return for exclusive access to the great lady. With Linnett’s persistent probing, we will begin to see the undersides of Lily’s rise to fame. Miller has crafted a brilliant novel weaving issues of racial integration, Christian ideals, marriage and motherhood, intergenerational strife, privacy, personal ambition, and white privilege into the end-of-life history of one woman and her family.
November 26, 2020
This novel is mostly the reminiscences of an aged woman, Lily, who became an author in her 70s, impressing the literati, first with her memoir and then her short fiction. Lily’s family life, both the one she was born into and the one she created with a subsequently divorced husband, was not happy. She was a cold mother who was never close to her children. Seriously incapacitated by Parkinson’s, waiting for a nursing home slot, she moves into the home of her architect son, Alan, and his French wife, Gaby. A journalist who’s had her own bad relationships and drinks too much, comes to interview Lily. This sounds dull, and indeed it was to me. There’s lots of musing on younger days, by every character and most of the conflict is about unsuccessful relationships. I believe this is in the interest of character development and some readers would find it poignant, but it didn’t move me. I didn’t engage with any of the characters nor care a great deal what happened to them. That’s what motivates my love of fiction so I didn’t enjoy this book. I was also a bit annoyed (and surprised) by a couple of changes in POV in the middle of a scene.
January 18, 2024
I did not love this book…I don’t think it was the right time in my life for it.
Alan, the architect, and his wife Gaby have moved Alan’s mother, Lily, into their home during the sunset of her life. She is struggling with Parkinson’s, and Alan is struggling with his long buried feelings of resentment for her.
I thought the characters were too highbrow, the conversations too boring and self-indulgent, and the plot slow and plodding. I really didn’t care if poor little Alan got over his mommy issues at all. Didn’t care if the bitchy, nasty Linette came up with a good article, and didn’t care whether or not Gaby and Alan slept around on each other a little more. Didn’t care if the cantankerous Lily lived, died, or got the last word. And didn’t care if Marcea labeled Lily a racist or not. (Who died and made Marcea the judge and jury anyway?)
This book was boring, from beginning to end. The definition of “first world problems.”
Alan, the architect, and his wife Gaby have moved Alan’s mother, Lily, into their home during the sunset of her life. She is struggling with Parkinson’s, and Alan is struggling with his long buried feelings of resentment for her.
I thought the characters were too highbrow, the conversations too boring and self-indulgent, and the plot slow and plodding. I really didn’t care if poor little Alan got over his mommy issues at all. Didn’t care if the bitchy, nasty Linette came up with a good article, and didn’t care whether or not Gaby and Alan slept around on each other a little more. Didn’t care if the cantankerous Lily lived, died, or got the last word. And didn’t care if Marcea labeled Lily a racist or not. (Who died and made Marcea the judge and jury anyway?)
This book was boring, from beginning to end. The definition of “first world problems.”
February 12, 2024
A complex, character driven novel with great descriptions and clashing memories and motives. Alan is the architect son who is a grave disappointment to his mother (Lily) because he hasn't done more with his life. He's still angry with her for focusing her life on her ideals and helping in the early Civil Rights Movement, rather than being more of a mother. She becomes a famous feminist author in her 70s by writing a memoir, but as she ages and her Parkinsonism gets worse, she can no longer live on her own. She's in the transition between independent living and elderly housing and has to live with Alan and his wife, Gaby, during that time. But her fame continues to bring people to seek her for interviews and they bring a lot of extra tension to the story. Although the story is mostly about Alan and Lily's relationship, Miller does and excellent job of bringing the other characters to life to enhance the whole story.
September 29, 2020
I really liked this story. It had that “certain something” that made me want to find out more about these characters. At different points I wondered if Ms Miller had two stories in her mind and found a way to meld them together. I don’t mean that in a bad way, but the main character was a writer and had short stories or essays in the book as a sub script. It seemed a little odd, but I absolutely loved the shorts, so I became more interested in this character and what she was trying to say.
At times I liked all, (or most) of the characters and at times I disliked them as well. I could picture each as they put on the masks that they show the world while pretending to be something they are not, or pretending not to see what is in front of them. I do believe I need to read some more Sue Miller.
At times I liked all, (or most) of the characters and at times I disliked them as well. I could picture each as they put on the masks that they show the world while pretending to be something they are not, or pretending not to see what is in front of them. I do believe I need to read some more Sue Miller.
December 16, 2024
This is the first book I have read by Sue Miller. It started out very slowly for me. In fact I left it midway through to read other things. I am glad I returned to it. Patience is rewarded with this one.
It is a study of the complicated relationship between a woman, Lily Maynard, and her son Alan, set at the end of Lily's life. Of course, there is lots of backstory. It allows the author to examine questions of race and the role of women in society as well as the responsibilities of both parent and child. The setup in the early part of the story pays off in the second half where things really start to happen. If fact, the last chapter justifies the time spent to get to it.
The writing style is careful and precise - something I admire. Looking back, I can't think of any element of the plot or any scene that was not required to paint the whole picture.
It is a study of the complicated relationship between a woman, Lily Maynard, and her son Alan, set at the end of Lily's life. Of course, there is lots of backstory. It allows the author to examine questions of race and the role of women in society as well as the responsibilities of both parent and child. The setup in the early part of the story pays off in the second half where things really start to happen. If fact, the last chapter justifies the time spent to get to it.
The writing style is careful and precise - something I admire. Looking back, I can't think of any element of the plot or any scene that was not required to paint the whole picture.
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