Daddy's Roommate

by Michael Willhoite

A young boy discusses his divorced father's new living situation, in which the father and his gay roommate share eating, doing chores, playing, loving, and living.

Genres: Picture Books, LGBT, Childrens, Banned Books, Fiction, Queer, Family

32 pages, Paperback

First published June 1, 1990

Reviews

[Nicole Baldwin · Rating 5 out of 5]

So, while conducting my research on the book prior to reading, I found many things. I found that this was actually one of the first books to portray gay life in a positive way. I found that this book simply shows their daily routines, nothing out of the norm. However, this book has been known as one of the most banned books in the recent years. The American Library Association rated this book 2/100 for top banned books. “In 2005 in Centerville, Indiana, the newly-elected Centerville School Board felt the need to “protect its students from exposure and access to controversial materials”” (http://world.edu/banned-book-awarenes...). So, what this is saying is that the book is banned because they are portraying a gay couple rather than a straight couple. If the couple was straight, then this book would have not been banned. Apparently, there were so many complaints about this book from parents, librarians, and other people involved in schools that they began to take out of libraries.

The only way I could see this book to have been banned is because of religious beliefs. Some parents may feel that if a teacher reads this book to their children they are trying to change their religious beliefs. The word “gay” is used and possibly parents do not want their children to learn about different types of sexualities yet. This book includes few words, but great pictures to show how happy they are. I think the main reason this book is banned is because of people who do not believe in same sex relationships. If parents do not believe in them, it is very likely they do not want their children to believe in them either.

Despite anyone’s views on this book I absolutely loved it. I would love to share this book with any grade, especially the younger grades. I think this book would promote more acceptance in our community. I enjoy the message of this book how that just because they are gay does not mean they are wrong or any different than people who are not gay. This book portrays an alternative family and I think this would be great for children to see. This book could bring up a lot of questions that children have about this topic and I think that is great. I think reading this book to first graders would be very beneficial because they could start very early learning about people who may be different than them. This would not only be educational, but it could prevent future bullying. Also, when children start to learn more about their own sexuality this book could be beneficial because it may show them that no matter the gender of the person they like, they can be happy. I wish I could read this book to my class someday, maybe the world will become more accepting while I am a teacher. Therefore, this was a lovey book and I truly hope you read it someday.

[hhhhhhhhh · Rating 2 out of 5]

this book is FAIL.

well, let me clarify: this part is GREAT: "Mom says Daddy and Frank are gay./At first I didn't know what that meant. So she explained it./Being gay is just one more kind of love./ And love is the best kind of happiness." Lovely, appropriate, true.

but the illustrations are wack for a kid's book. Daddy's roommate has a package!? You gotta be kidding me. In one panel, "We go to the beach", Daddy's too busy making googly eyes at Frank while Frank rubs sunscreen on Daddy's back to even notice the little kid has wandered off and is talking to strangers.

Daddy's Roommate Redux, with updated illustrations, would rock. I'm sure he and the publishers meant well, but according to the book, the writer/illustrator wrote cartoons for gay grownups and something called "And Now For My Next Trick..." before taking on a kid's book. It was brave to write this in 1990, but even I wouldn't keep this in my collection.

[Jeremy · Rating 1 out of 5]

The book starts with a boy whose parents divorce. Pictures of the gay men sleeping together, tenderly making up after a fight, applying sunscreen, cuddling on a couch, etc. The mom has to explain "gay," and here's how the boy explains it: "Being gay is just one more kind of love." Like Thor is just one more kind of god.

Alyson Wonderland is an imprint that "focuses on books for an about the children of lesbian and gay parents."

One thing the book gets right: This mess starts with divorce.

[Sarah Fisher · Rating 3 out of 5]

The storyline of this book is great and perfect for young children. There's about one simple sentence per page and the concept of a gay couple is presented perfectly for the age group. The child spends time with his dad and his "roommate." He explains that his dad and his roommate do everything together. They hang out with him. They cook together. And they sleep in the same bed together. Mom later explains that dad is gay. The son asks what that means and she simply says, it means they are two men that love each other. That love can be expressed in different ways.

Now on to the illustrations. Oh...god... Basically, you want to read this to your 3 year old? Go for it...they won't notice. But here's the deal, we can assume the child's dad divorced the mom when he finally came out of the closet. He's fairly normal looking and obviously related to his child. His "roommate"? Think middle aged Freddy Mercury on a really gay beach vacation. Stereotyped (albeit hilarious ones) out the ass. And speaking of beach vacation, the illustration for the two dads hanging out at the beach with their son is just TOO unnecessary as they lotion each others backs. And as someone else mentioned, the Freddy Mercury wannabe has a sizable package...

[Rebecca Drake · Rating 4 out of 5]

Reading this story I think it does an amazing job and talking to children about different family structures!

This book was challenged in many states in the nineties for the same reason of "King and King" It openly shows an LGBTQ relationship, and many people didn't want their children to have access to that in the libraries.

I think the story is very well done. It uses simple and appropriate wording, and talks about how two men can love each other and that's okay. The illustrations are wonderful as well.

It terms of use in the classroom, this is a book I would have in my library, and if I was teaching an older group, possibly use it to teach about families. I also think if I had children who related closely to this story, it would be important to use as a way of helping that child feel accepted.

There are a lot of instances where a couple divorces, and one of the people starts dating a member of the same sex. It happens, and we have children who are in that situation. That's their family dynamic, and even if it is different, it is important to discuss their family as well!

[Jackie · Rating 4 out of 5]

An unexceptional picture book with an exceptional message. The book, quite simply, shows the protagonist's father and his father's new boyfriend acting like any heterosexual couple; they cuddle, argue, make up, and raise the protagonist together. The protagonist's mother, amicably divorced from his father, explains that the two men are gay and that the fact that they love each other is the most important thing. The book is great for showing children that having a gay parent, or two gay parents, is nothing to be ashamed of--it would work both for children who have gay parent(s) and those who live in a different family situation. On a lesser scale, the book also suggests that having divorced parents and having parents who date or remarry is normal, too, and not the end of the world.

The actual content of the book is nothing special; the illustrations are bright and pleasantly cartoony, and the text is serviceable. The book's message is one that needs to be taught, though--it's worth it just for that.

[Dest · Rating 2 out of 5]

If someone asked me to recommend a book for kids with gay parents, I would not recommend this one. Still, it's not really terrible. It's just so old school and, I think, probably written by someone who just wanted there to be one decent picture book where a kid has a homosexual parent.

[Madeline Shogren · Rating 3 out of 5]

I decided to read this book for my controversial-type book. The title caught my attention right away when I saw it and I believe that the topic would be relatable to some of my future students. I know that this is a family dynamic that some children have nowadays because it is legal in most states. Children are able to embrace this type of family and I think it should become a commonality just as any other type of family. It is about a child's parents who decide to split up and then their father starts seeing a new man. The child is puzzled about this new relationship because many children do not learn about gay relationships or marriage in schools. It is often not mentioned during sexual health education lessons so many kids are not aware of what it entails. I feel like this would be a hard transition for a child to have, from their original parents splitting, to their father starting to see a person of the same sex. I think that I would consider keeping this book in my classroom for older students, maybe 3rd-5th graders. I would keep it in elementary aged children because it is a picture book. I think that it is an important topic for students to learn about and I think that teachers should consider teaching same sex relationships and marriages as normal just like opposite sex couples. I never want any of my students to be bullied about having a different family dynamic than others. I would make sure to email parents/guardians about the book first being in the classroom just to make sure that there are none who are uncomfortable about it being placed in a classroom. I would also have to check with the school to make sure it is not banned.

[Nicole · Rating 4 out of 5]

My personal reaction was I thought this book Daddy's Roommate shows the truth about gay parents. For example, gives a real world experience with the realities of having a gay parent.

The purpose of the book would be for read aloud enrichment. It would best be suitable for k-1. The theme is that even though they are different they are still normal. They do normal things such as do household cleaning and even fight like a normal couple. I think this book would be good for realistic fiction because the subject in this books relates to real life experiences. Also, this book hints that if your parents are divorced its okay for them to get back out there and meet someone else. Bright illustrations enhances the text.

[Desca Ang · Rating 4 out of 5]

Daddy's Roomate tells a story about a boy whose parents are no longer together and his father starts living with a guy. The father does all the things with his partner. The young boy is also involved in every activity. He then asks his mum and his mum says that his father and new partner are gay. Mum also explains that gay is another form of love.

I love this book because the story line is clear. Each of the part is being explained well and briefly. I love also the part when this young boy's mum explains him about what gay is. I think it is good thing also that one can use this book to give an illustration about gay to his or her children about what gay is in the simplest way.

4 stars out of 5

[Krista the Krazy Kataloguer · Rating 2 out of 5]

In this book a boy talks about his father and his father's boyfriend, with whom he visits. What I found unrealistic is the easy acceptance on the part of the mother. True, there may be some women who would be accepting, but I think the majority would be embarrassed and/or angry if their husband turned out to be gay. What I also disliked about the book were the illustrations, which were cartoonish. The style seemed to detract from the serious message of the book. Otherwise, it was a nice, positive effort to explain a homosexual relationship to a child whose father may be involved in one.

[H. Givens · Rating 4 out of 5]

Dated... but kind of adorbs, and significant for enthusiasts. (Queer history, queer-friendly kids' books, etc)

[miris · Rating 4 out of 5]

❤️

[Rick · Rating 3 out of 5]

Well, it’s a little dated. But the heart is in the right place.

[Jake Hodge · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was my favorite that I read this week because it really hit close to home. I grew up in a household where I had two mom's and was always taught that love is love no matter what. This idea of thinking that this is daddy's roommate really related to be growing up almost either being ashamed or not knowing about my mom's relationships and trying to call it something else. But I believe this book shows a good family dynamic and shows aspects of LGBT life that teaches a lot.

[Cammie Scott · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book would be a helpful tool to use to help children understand same sex marriages/relationships. The book became controversial in 1990 after it was published. People were angry that the author was normalizing same sex relationships. It began disappearing off library shelves so children in the community could not read it. However, I thought it was a great book. While there was not much text in the book, the author easily writes about how same sex couples create love in a family. The whole theme of the book was that there is still the same amount of love coming from same sex parents. I think that it is a great book to use in the classroom if it is something that needs to be discussed. Otherwise, it is a great tool for families who can relate. Overall, I thought it was a really great book.

[Stas · Rating 3 out of 5]

A little dated, but surprisingly solid.

[Fortnite King · Rating 1 out of 5]

It is the kid book good.

[Jordan · Rating 5 out of 5]

Daddy’s Roommate is a non-fiction text that can leave a lot of questions for children. It is age appropriate so the children are able to understand the context. It is also told from the view point of the child. The child is face with real life issues when it comes to his parents getting a divorce. After some time, his father gets a roommate, a partner, which creates a sense of innocence. The plot is thick and rich of events that the partners and son experience together. The text uses language that is appropriate for children who might be reading this book when it comes to learning that the roommate is actually the child’s fathers partner. The characters are realistic especially when they speak of love between two people who are not a part of a heterosexual relationship, “Being gay is just one more kind of love”.
The illustrations are accurate in terms of settings, and plot. The illustrations also accompany the text very well. The pictures are colorful and should keep the child interested throughout the whole story. They also enhance the story to show the love between the characters.
The characters in this book are all Caucasian, but that is typical for a book that is from the ‘90’s. There are no negative stereotypes that presented in this text. This text creates a lifestyle that is unique with different locations placed in the plot. The author wrote this book for his father. This puts him into the group represented within the text.

[Garielle Hawes]

This picture book is about a young boy who experiences a change in his family. His mother and father divorced, and when he moved with his father he noticed that his father had a roommate. Only to find out later that his father's roommate was his dad's partner. I really enjoyed this story because it brought awareness to same-sex families but also discussed the issue in a positive light. At first I was worried about the mother's statement about the father being gay, but when she explained it as being, "one more kind of love", it was very warming and a great way to explain the situation. The story is also age appropriate for children and gives them a lot to think about. The book uses simplistic language, so that kindergarten classes and first graders are able to understand read. The illustrations match what is going on in the story and it enhances the story, because the students can see what is being read aloud. The story does not display much cultural variety, because it is talking specifically about a young white boy and his white parents and their family dynamic. There is no display of negative stereotypes represented because the premise of the story is to recognize that love is what makes a family. The characters lifestyles do seem honest and genuine and simple to see especially through illustrations.

[Melissa · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book is realistic fiction. This was a banned book because it said that it was glorifying/ raising awareness of gay couples. I do not really understand why this book was banned but i think students will find this book interesting. There are some things we can tell students to consider or think about after reading this story. I did not really see a problem and resolution in this story clear out but the hidden problem would be his dad being gay and the resolution is him not really caring because they both love them and each other. The characters are convincing and many of the things the boy does with him and his dad's roommate kids do with their parents. Some of the things they did was play ball, tell jokes, get into fight and make up after, helps him catch bugs for show and tell, and other things. The illustrations are great and i loved them. I think they bring out the best of the words and keeps kids attention. There was not much of a variety of cultural groups. I also think that there was a stereotype of same sex couple. also though out the entire book they kept on referring to his dad's boyfriend as his roommate and i think they were down playing their relationship. Only about 4 pages talked about how his mom told him his dad is gay and then at the end of the story they still referred to him as his dad's roommate.

[Vanessa (V.C.) · Rating 5 out of 5]

Published in 1990, Daddy's Roommate in such a simple story is way ahead of its time in depicting two gay men raising a child together and doing normal every-day things, and who even argue sometimes. It was also lovely and surprising how this story also had where the mother is clearly accepting of her ex-husband being gay and having a live-in boyfriend who participates in the parenting and where she's sharing that so openly and positively with her little boy. It was all just so sweet and heartwarming and truly wonderful. I can imagine that in its time of publication, this was really daring, bold, and controversial (especially since this novel is geared towards children) when it isn't and never should have been. I'd say that this is still as timely and needed as ever, unfortunately, even in a time when LGBT children's literature is way more acceptable and accessible. Not surprisingly, this was published by the woefully defunct Alyson Books which had always been a leader of LGBT fiction since the 80s, in a time when queer literature was rare and hidden. Of course it's outdated in that you would never call a queer person's partner a "roommate" - but that was how it was and would have been said back then. Thankfully times have changed, and I'd still say that this little book is such a gem of early-day queer representation!

[Reily Moen · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was published in 1990, and likely banned due to the homosexuality involved. It is about a boy whose parents get divorced because his dad is gay. His dad finds a new partner, and at first the little boy just notices that his dad and his "roommate" do a lot of things together. At the end of the story the little boy's mom finally explains to him that his dad is gay, and that being gay is just another kind of love. Many people who were against promoting sexuality would have had major issues with this book.

Considering the day and age we live in and the level of acceptance that the general population now has for the LGBTQ community, I can see this book being used in classrooms. However it is very simplistic and captures only the general idea of what being gay means, so it would likely not be suitable for kids older than kindergarten or first grade. However I do think that it sends a good message, and definitely reflects the general feeling of society today, even if it didn't at its publication. It teaches kids at an early age that being gay, though it may be a little different than the traditional heterosexual relationship, is still a valid form of love. With the way that society's mindset is shifting, it is important for kids to learn to have open minds as well.

[Kylie Kayemba · Rating 4 out of 5]

I thought this book explained a difficult life change in a way that a child would understand. Most kids wouldn't know how to cope with such a monumental change in their way of life, so I enjoyed the fact that Willhoite put things in terms that a young child would be able to grasp. The book goes over the fact that the little boy's father and mother don't want to be with each other anymore, but that they are able to be civil and there was no love lost. It also introduces his father's boyfriend in a way that isn't threatening or forced.

I think it's quite obvious why the book was banned. The book was published in 1991, which wasn't too long ago, but I don't think LGBT people were as accepted as they are nowadays, and even now, there's a lot to work to be done in regards to the acceptance of members of this community. Many people are not comfortable with the idea of their kids being exposed to content featuring gay or lesbian people, but I think that is a very damaging stance to hold. I would absolutely have this book in my classroom, just to show that there are people out there who have two dads, or two moms, or do not otherwise fit the "traditional" family unit.

[Rachael · Rating 5 out of 5]

Controversial Book Review

I loved this book! It is extremely simple and straightforward. A child's parents have divorced, and Daddy is now living with a man. The book shows Daddy and Frank cooking together, doing yard work, and sleeping in the same bed. It's definitely controversial/ banned for very clear reasons, but I adored it. The mom tells the child that Daddy and Frank are gay, and the kid doesn't know what that means. Mommy replies, "Being gay is just one more kind of love, and love is the best kind of happiness." I love the sweetness and simplicity of that. (In real life, I'm sure it was difficult for Mommy to deal with her husband turning out to be gay, but that obviously didn't need to be mentioned in this book.)
The illustrations in this book, I have to say, are HILARIOUS. This book came out in the 80s, and the dad and Frank are both absolute 80s caricatures. This didn't impact my opinion of the book, but I thought it should be pointed out.

[Taylor · Rating 3 out of 5]

This fictional piece was an interesting read for me. Though I really wanted to like this read, I didn't agree with the delivery of this story. The story is filled with simple sentences to simply describe everything that daddy and Frank do with the child, but I felt the vocabulary didn't appeal to all ages but rather the younger children. There were not a variety of descriptive terms nor sentences. The illustrator did a fine job of drawing the pictures because it would be very engaging to any young reader. The age intended for this book is under seven years old. Overall, the storyline was great for introducing to young who may not fully understand a difficult topic. This opens the door for parents or guardians in this situation to explain in a way that their children will have a true understanding and not be ashamed of their situations.

[Juliana Pearce · Rating 4 out of 5]

Daddy's Roommate is about a little boy whose father is gay and lives with a "roommate". This book's controversies lie in the fact that homosexuality hasn't always been widely accepted by the population and it wasn't very common. I think that this book's message about how there are different kinds of love and all love is good would really help some children in similar situations. I think it helps end the stigma surrounding homosexuality and it allows children to be more understanding and empathetic. Although we still live in a world where homosexuality isn't fully accepted by some, I would love to read this to my classroom and discuss the importance of being yourself. I think my students would really benefit socially from reading this book!

[Ally · Rating 4 out of 5]

TEXT SET

This book is about a young boy who, after his parents get divorced, his father moves in with his gay partner./ The book depicts the gay couple as doing all things a heterosexual couple would do; cleaning, eating, sleeping, reading, arguing etc. The text is very straightforward and simple, giving the needed amount of attention to the illustrations. The relationship is explained as “one more kind of love” showing that the important message is who you love and not what gender they are.

[Jessie Weber · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really liked this book. I thought they had a great explanation about the meaning of being gay. I thought it showed a picture of a very good functional family. I thought the picture were good.

My summary,
A little boy goes to his dad's place and hangs out with him and his roommate. He asks his mom about daddy's roommate and she explains to him that his dad is gay and what the meaning of being gay is and why they got a divorce.

[Maura · Rating 3 out of 5]

I appreciate what the book is doing...it shows a gay couple living together normally. One of the men has a son who comes to visit and things remain normal - there is no corruption, the son doesn't suddenly turn gay...normality. That being said, it's boring. Nothing really happens. And the men...yikes, totally 80's gay stereotypes. And the mustache on the one... This book could probably be modernized in so far as its illustration go.