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Girls on the Edge: The Four Factors Driving the New Crisis for Girls: Sexual Identity, the Cyberbubble, Obsessions, Environmental Toxins
Girls are cutting themselves with razors. Girls are convinced they€™re fat, and starve themselves to prove it. Other girls are so anxious about grades they can€™t sleep at night—at eleven years of age. What€™s going on? In Girls on the Edge, Dr. Leonard Sax provides the answers. He shares stories of girls who look confident and strong on the outside, but are fragile within. He shows why a growing proportion of teen and tween girls are confused about their sexual identity, or are obsessed with grades or Facebook. Dr. Sax provides parents with tools to help girls become confident women, along with practical tips on helping your daughter choose a sport, nurturing her spirit through female centered activities, and more. Compelling and inspiring, Girls on the Edge points the way to a new future for today€™s young women.
272 pages, Hardcover
First published April 1, 2010
131 people are currently reading
3040 people want to read
About the author
Leonard Sax
15 books243 followersLeonard Sax is an American psychologist and family physician. He is the author of Why Gender Matters (Doubleday, 2005; revised edition to be published in 2017); Boys Adrift: the five factors driving the growing epidemic of unmotivated boys and underachieving young men (Basic Books, 2007; revised edition, 2016); Girls on the Edge (Basic Books, 2010); and The Collapse of Parenting (Basic Books, 2015). The Collapse of Parenting became a New York Times bestseller.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 303 reviews
May 29, 2020
Not a fan!! Although I thought it was interesting to read about all of the issues that girls face growing up in today's society, I thought that much of the advice and opinions were complete junk. The advice and opinions provided in this book were very black and white. The writer was constantly putting girls inside this one size fits all box that describes what all girls are like and what is best for them. There were a few useful tips but they did not even closely make up for all of the awful ones.
If you are looking for a book that says things like you can't expect a girl to wear a midriff shirt to school and still do good because she will spend her whole time worrying about her looks, she needs to wear something modest, then this is the book for you. This book is sexist and really reinforces negative gender stereotypes. To each their own but I'm actually quite surprised and alarmed that it has such a high rating. I do not recommend!!
If you are looking for a book that says things like you can't expect a girl to wear a midriff shirt to school and still do good because she will spend her whole time worrying about her looks, she needs to wear something modest, then this is the book for you. This book is sexist and really reinforces negative gender stereotypes. To each their own but I'm actually quite surprised and alarmed that it has such a high rating. I do not recommend!!
April 11, 2011
Girls today have far greater opportunities than their grandmothers had and therefore they have every chance for a very fulfilling life, one in which they can attain their potential. Yet, more girls are “on the edge”, why? Leonard Sax explores the possible reasons why our young daughters are not as happy and adjusted as we want them to be. Could it be the early sexualisation of girls? Could it be technology which keeps them connected 24*7 to their friends preventing them from being connected to their true selves? Is it because technology like social media is forcing them to present themselves as others want to see them rather than as they are? Could it be the toxins in their food, hair products and creams? The author discusses all of these topics in detail, backed by research and then provides us with practical strategies for parenting a girl, to help her develop into her authentic self, to become the woman she is meant to be and to be a happy, well adjusted member of her family and society.
I was surprised when this book was suggested for our book club. I started reading it with a great deal of skepticism as it was different from the kind of books we normally read - typically literary fiction. However I enjoyed the book and would go so far as to say that it is a Must Read for parents of daughters and anyone (grandparents, uncles, aunts, and teachers) who has the opportunity to participate in the raising of a girl. The book also gets the reader thinking about current culture and lifestyle. Are we forming real relationships? Are we living authentic lives? Has our life become a performance meant always to please and stay popular? Have we lost that sense of community in which a young girl forged relationships with so many people of varying ages? This is a very good book. I highly recommend it.
I was surprised when this book was suggested for our book club. I started reading it with a great deal of skepticism as it was different from the kind of books we normally read - typically literary fiction. However I enjoyed the book and would go so far as to say that it is a Must Read for parents of daughters and anyone (grandparents, uncles, aunts, and teachers) who has the opportunity to participate in the raising of a girl. The book also gets the reader thinking about current culture and lifestyle. Are we forming real relationships? Are we living authentic lives? Has our life become a performance meant always to please and stay popular? Have we lost that sense of community in which a young girl forged relationships with so many people of varying ages? This is a very good book. I highly recommend it.
April 26, 2016
2016 - Reread for book club.
2012 - A really, really good read. I devoured this book. I didn't realize it at the time, but I have read another of his books - 'Why Gender Matters'. I came away with an understanding of some of the problems that face girls today. What I also understood is how inspired the 'For Strength of Youth', 'Personal Progress', and the whole Young Women's program really is. It really sets girls apart and can strengthen them in this day and age. I also felt vindicated because the doctor/author said we should have our kids's phones in our room at 10:00 at night and not let them have a computer in their room but in a common area where we can keep an eye on what they are viewing.
2012 - A really, really good read. I devoured this book. I didn't realize it at the time, but I have read another of his books - 'Why Gender Matters'. I came away with an understanding of some of the problems that face girls today. What I also understood is how inspired the 'For Strength of Youth', 'Personal Progress', and the whole Young Women's program really is. It really sets girls apart and can strengthen them in this day and age. I also felt vindicated because the doctor/author said we should have our kids's phones in our room at 10:00 at night and not let them have a computer in their room but in a common area where we can keep an eye on what they are viewing.
May 24, 2010
Like "Boys Adrift," this book has a lot of information that I was happy to learn, and I'm glad the author wrote a book about girls. Never having been a your girl in my years growing up, some of the ideas were very new to me. One thing that struck me -- maybe it was in "Boys Adrift," too, and I simply didn't notice -- is that he gives you a horror story, something really bad that happened, and only afterwords says "now that's a rare case, but..." It seems to me that's a propaganda trick: "If you don't follow my advice, think what horrible things can occur." I still think that a lot of the information is useful, thus the high rating, but I wish the presentation would've been a little different.
March 8, 2012
*A new kind of help for a new kind of crisis*
While the technology of today offers countless advances in how we live our daily lives, it also results in never-before-encountered challenges and stressors that threaten the livelihood and futures of young women. In his book _Girls On the Edge_, Leonard Sax identifies the four key factors that are creating what he terms the "new crisis for girls." These factors include:
1. Sexual identity--young girls are acting sexual before they even are sexual, and despite their appearances, are more confused and insecure than ever before
2. The cyberbubble--being constantly connected online has resulted in girls disconnecting from their true selves and in-person relationships
3. Obsessions--the fixations that result in attempts to cope with overwhelming anxiety and depression and fill the black hole that resides where identity and self-esteem should be
4. Environmental toxins--endocrine disruptors found in the environment that result in an earlier onset of puberty, which, in turn, causes increased risk for depression, anxiety and substance abuse
If you're the parent of an adolescent girl, this book may be a lifesaver. A true eye opener, it is filled with a plethora of insight and information. But more importantly, it serves as a heart-opening guide for guide how we can provide young women the nourishment and the nurturing they crave, and the identities and the joy they deserve.
While the technology of today offers countless advances in how we live our daily lives, it also results in never-before-encountered challenges and stressors that threaten the livelihood and futures of young women. In his book _Girls On the Edge_, Leonard Sax identifies the four key factors that are creating what he terms the "new crisis for girls." These factors include:
1. Sexual identity--young girls are acting sexual before they even are sexual, and despite their appearances, are more confused and insecure than ever before
2. The cyberbubble--being constantly connected online has resulted in girls disconnecting from their true selves and in-person relationships
3. Obsessions--the fixations that result in attempts to cope with overwhelming anxiety and depression and fill the black hole that resides where identity and self-esteem should be
4. Environmental toxins--endocrine disruptors found in the environment that result in an earlier onset of puberty, which, in turn, causes increased risk for depression, anxiety and substance abuse
If you're the parent of an adolescent girl, this book may be a lifesaver. A true eye opener, it is filled with a plethora of insight and information. But more importantly, it serves as a heart-opening guide for guide how we can provide young women the nourishment and the nurturing they crave, and the identities and the joy they deserve.
December 20, 2018
I don't recommend this book. I listened to the audio version, and started off thoroughly enjoying it. The first few CDs were great and had some good insight about girls. However, the last 4 CDs or so just lost my interest. Although perhaps a girls school might be the best choice for our daughters, I am not going to go to my parent council and try to convince the principal that girls only classes should be created. I am also not going to have my daughter join a religion that I don't agree with simply because girls that belong to spiritual groups seem to do better on average than girls who don't.
Enough said?
Enough said?
August 12, 2010
Interesting book, but I didn't learn anything new. Most of it is common sense. Girls are different than boys. Right-o. Heard this many a time. But in a way he's almost reinforcing the stereotypes, even though he's meaning not too. Keep the computers out of their rooms - check. Monitor their cell phone use - check. His mean girls assessment was a little off the mark, unrealistic mainly, and truly if you've never been female, that's a hard one to really understand. But I could tell he meant well overall and that he cares about children and the dangers they face today. Which is many. And now I'm a little more frightened, for them, and for me as their parent.
Oh, and I did learn a thing or two about arm pit hair. Studies have shown that male and female offspring can identify their father's armpit hair just by smelling pieces of it. We can identify the pheromones of our parents! If we're not too grossed out in the process...I guess. So there's a fun family activity!
Also, apparently back east a lawn mover is called a lawn tractor. Soo..I guess if you have a lawn back there you're considered a what, a farmer? Sounds like some weird back east thing to me..:)
Oh, and I did learn a thing or two about arm pit hair. Studies have shown that male and female offspring can identify their father's armpit hair just by smelling pieces of it. We can identify the pheromones of our parents! If we're not too grossed out in the process...I guess. So there's a fun family activity!
Also, apparently back east a lawn mover is called a lawn tractor. Soo..I guess if you have a lawn back there you're considered a what, a farmer? Sounds like some weird back east thing to me..:)
April 7, 2025
A bit dated...
And I knew some of this before...
But I loved it. 14yo me felt so seen. And 30+yo me feels like I need more calcium in my life.
It's applicable, actionable, and fascinating. I don't often think about my tween/teen years but, when I do I spend time thinking about how they were all wrong. Miraculously, providentially, there's a lot in this book that proves that it was actually more right than I thought. I also thought it was interesting how various suggestions that he makes are being implemented in my greater community. I do wish that there were better tips on coed education. Single-sex instruction just isn't feasible.
I also find it interesting that it's being called sexist when some sections reinforce certain oft-repeated statements about "the patriarchy" and male bias.
And I knew some of this before...
But I loved it. 14yo me felt so seen. And 30+yo me feels like I need more calcium in my life.
It's applicable, actionable, and fascinating. I don't often think about my tween/teen years but, when I do I spend time thinking about how they were all wrong. Miraculously, providentially, there's a lot in this book that proves that it was actually more right than I thought. I also thought it was interesting how various suggestions that he makes are being implemented in my greater community. I do wish that there were better tips on coed education. Single-sex instruction just isn't feasible.
I also find it interesting that it's being called sexist when some sections reinforce certain oft-repeated statements about "the patriarchy" and male bias.
April 18, 2017
Girls on the Edge was hard to read at times! Parenting is tough. Great read with valuable information. I was fascinated by the section on toxins. Thanks for lending it to Leanne!
August 15, 2023
Skipped a few chapters, but most of it was really relavent and helpful. Great food for thought while raising girls.
May 15, 2012
Since reading “Queen Bees and Wannabes,” which eventually inspired the movie “Mean Girls,” I have been particularly fascinated with the culture of teen girls, and how it doesn’t really end once the high schoolers go off to college. In this particular book, physician and psychologist Leonard Sax, who previously penned a similar book about boys, examines what he believes are four factors impacting the current society in which girls are growing up. These are sexual identity, the cyberbubble, obsessions, and environmental toxins. He dedicates a chapter to each, as well as drawing connections between the various factors. One issue addressed in the sexuality chapter which I have not seen mentioned often in other texts is the increasing “cool” factor of bisexuality and lesbianism. In his chapter on technology, Sax points to sleep deprivation as a factor in the overdiagnosis and medicating of ADHD. In the final chapters, Sax also addresses the importance of feeding the mind, body, and soul of young women, making some interesting points about the differences in physical education, academic education, and religious education for boys and girls.
Though this book does not present a particularly comprehensive look at the adolescence of girls (as evidenced by the title itself), it does make good points about the four titular issues, some of which have yet to be addressed in depth in other materials. An excellent addition to popular literature regarding psychology and development in young women.
Though this book does not present a particularly comprehensive look at the adolescence of girls (as evidenced by the title itself), it does make good points about the four titular issues, some of which have yet to be addressed in depth in other materials. An excellent addition to popular literature regarding psychology and development in young women.
June 19, 2010
Some of this book covers very familiar territory. BPA in plastics of all kinds are influencing our bodies is scary and unknowable ways, and sadly kids are getting more of it even than adults. In my house, I recently tossed all the crappy mismatched plastic containers used by my wife and asked her to start using only glass and ceramic for microwave warming.
This book notes that now puberty for girls at age 8 is not considered unusual, and in fact may be traceable to the drop in breast feeding among American women. More formula equals more plastic bottles and nipples.
There is much more here. The author zeros in on 4 issues, including the role on texting/computers, obsessive behaviors and sexual identity's generated by the mass media - plus toxins. All of this is having an impact on girls specifically that is upsetting. The book hits many other themes: he supports single-sex classrooms, uniforms to discourage showoffs and schools where teachers spend time with students at lunch. But he also talks about sports and says parents are wise to advise their kids to stay away from gymnastics, figure skating and cheerleading - because all 3 focus on how you look, rather than what you do.
Although the writing is a bit stilted and this author comes across as fairly preachy and overbearing, he lays out some compelling evidence. Dads and moms, take note.
This book notes that now puberty for girls at age 8 is not considered unusual, and in fact may be traceable to the drop in breast feeding among American women. More formula equals more plastic bottles and nipples.
There is much more here. The author zeros in on 4 issues, including the role on texting/computers, obsessive behaviors and sexual identity's generated by the mass media - plus toxins. All of this is having an impact on girls specifically that is upsetting. The book hits many other themes: he supports single-sex classrooms, uniforms to discourage showoffs and schools where teachers spend time with students at lunch. But he also talks about sports and says parents are wise to advise their kids to stay away from gymnastics, figure skating and cheerleading - because all 3 focus on how you look, rather than what you do.
Although the writing is a bit stilted and this author comes across as fairly preachy and overbearing, he lays out some compelling evidence. Dads and moms, take note.
November 7, 2013
50% of girls in the US will hit puberty before their 10th birthday!!! REALLY?!!! I think this book is my book club pick of the year--if I had a book club. :) I'd love to sit in a coffee shop and discuss his ideas: all-girls schools, cutting, early onset of puberty, the cyberbubble and the pseudo-society of teenagers, the need for female community that spans generations, anorexia of the soul, sports that focus on what you do rather than how you look, Finnish schools that disallow formal education until age 7 vs the academic preschool push in the US, female need for spirituality . . .
"Have friends.
Not too many.
Mostly females."
"founded on good friendships with two, three, four, or, at most, five other girls and/or women. The number may include her mom and/or another relative such as an aunt or a cousin, plus one or two girls her own age, and hopefully at least one woman besides Mom who is not her own age, ideally her Mom's age or older. Those friendships can last for decades, long after the boys are forgotten." last chapter pg 211
"Have friends.
Not too many.
Mostly females."
"founded on good friendships with two, three, four, or, at most, five other girls and/or women. The number may include her mom and/or another relative such as an aunt or a cousin, plus one or two girls her own age, and hopefully at least one woman besides Mom who is not her own age, ideally her Mom's age or older. Those friendships can last for decades, long after the boys are forgotten." last chapter pg 211
Read
September 27, 2023I had listened to a preview of this book a while ago & loved the concept of my daughters not basing their worth on anything changeable - how pretty they are, how smart, how popular, etc. It changed the way I spoke to my children. Instead of saying they are beautiful & smart, I now say they are beautiful & smart, but those things do not have anything to do with their great worth, which comes from being a daughter of God - something that will never change. That concept is absolutely critical & I'm so glad I learned it in this book. However, listening to the whole book was not great. I didn't agree with all his opinions & the studies & research are all pretty dated. I could have skipped reading the whole thing & just got that concept from the preview
June 27, 2017
Honestly, I am too exhausted by all the things I despised about this book. There were all the red flags, all the clearly bias "research" on each topic, "facts" that are cherry picked to fit into the author's personal view (he does a good job of tip toeing around it, but it's still very clear) rather than just stating the research and findings, and a lack of genuine experience or qualifications to speak so surely on certain subjects. To bring it all into a cohesive review feels overwhelming. Maybe I will revise this one day, but until then, avoid this book. If you're curious about subject matter, there are many other options.
October 28, 2010
Oh, I love love love Leonard Sax!!! It's now my goal to meet him, although if I do I'll probably end up gushing and making a total fool of myself. He's just so brilliant!!!
Okay . . . let me get ahold of myself. This book frightened me, with all the information about environmental toxins, but it was a very interested sort of frightened. And the thing I like about Sax is that he gives solutions to the problems after frightening you with them.
Okay . . . let me get ahold of myself. This book frightened me, with all the information about environmental toxins, but it was a very interested sort of frightened. And the thing I like about Sax is that he gives solutions to the problems after frightening you with them.
July 11, 2014
AMAZING! I found myself wanting to high five him at the end of each chapter! He explains the issues of our culture in a way that I found very informative without freaking out the reader. As the mother of 6 daughters, I appreciate the knowledge gained but encourage practically everyone I meet to read this book because raising children isnt for the wimpy and there is valuable information in these pages! One of my top 5 books this year!
June 9, 2021
I haven’t read a ton of books on parenting, but this is the best one I’ve read so far. Leonard Sax seems to have a deep understanding of the challenges facing young women, and a principled approach to facing these challenges. I didn’t agree with everything he said, but his knowledge and passion for the subject (along with his writing style) made even those parts easy to digest.
There are two reasons why it didn’t get a better rating - I wasn’t a huge fan of the chapter on environmental toxins (it felt a little conspiracy theory-like to me, although it did put that research on my radar as something I want to look into in the future), and the research he cited throughout the book made it clear that it was written in 2010.
This is a quick, interesting, practical read, but also fairly comprehensive in that it covers a wide variety of topics. I will absolutely be referencing this book as I raise my 2 daughters, and plan on reading it again in its entirety. I’ve also added his other book (Boys Adrift) to my To Read list.
There are two reasons why it didn’t get a better rating - I wasn’t a huge fan of the chapter on environmental toxins (it felt a little conspiracy theory-like to me, although it did put that research on my radar as something I want to look into in the future), and the research he cited throughout the book made it clear that it was written in 2010.
This is a quick, interesting, practical read, but also fairly comprehensive in that it covers a wide variety of topics. I will absolutely be referencing this book as I raise my 2 daughters, and plan on reading it again in its entirety. I’ve also added his other book (Boys Adrift) to my To Read list.
March 4, 2023
This was a heavy book. I think the information in it is very important for parents of girls today, but it was pretty depressing. I preferred Sax’s book The Collapse of Parenting to this one. It seemed to have more details about what parents can do to counteract the disturbing trends among youth today. It also wasn’t quite as graphic and depressing, but that could be due to the fact that it was published in 2015 and this one was published in 2020. A lot has happened in the world in those short 5 years. I do think it’s vital for us as parents to understand the inherent differences between boys and girls and the different challenges they face as a result so we can help them navigate the difficulties of adolescence. This book does an excellent job of explaining those differences and gives information to help parents empower their daughters to embrace who they are and become all that they have the potential to become.
July 20, 2019
I was super happy to listen to this book. I found many elements to be good conversation starts with my husband. It made me think about how I am parenting my cute girls and how I can help to develop their sense of self early on. It is a bit hard because the technology section is so outdated, but the ideas are still relevant. I’d also be interested in reading some of the cited studies. Overall, a thought provoking book on raising happy and healthy girls in our modern world.
January 10, 2023
For the most part, I really liked this book and so much of the information rang true for me. I really struggled with the sections on modest dress and spirituality... some of what the author proclaimed seemed to go against other information that I've read or heard. Regardless, I felt like there was some solid stuff that would definitely be of value to anyone raising girls.
August 4, 2023
Brought attention to common struggle teen girls face ones that I could relate to or see in my friends at school. I really liked how he emphasizes the importance of community of women of all ages, and the dangers that come from when your wisest friend is your age.
January 24, 2020
I really enjoyed this read personally and as a professional. I feel as if all people should rest this book, male and female.
January 24, 2022
So so much fascinating and helpful info. Highly recommend if you have a daughter or work with girls in any capacity!
August 24, 2023
Went on an obessive search for skincare that doesn’t contain endocrine disrupting chemicals (highlighy reccomend looking at ewg.org/skindeep)
August 27, 2018
I had already read Boys Adrift and so I thought it was a good idea to read the girls book. :) I thought it was a worth while read. I especially liked the info about developing bone density.
June 9, 2022
I found the status quo described by Dr. Sax in this book to be quite disturbing, but only because I was unaware of the cultural norms of the current generation. I appreciate his citations of scientific studies and that he has suggestions for how to address the problems he mentions.
July 23, 2019
A must-read book.
Sax gives strong evidence that ‘traditional’ gender roles are not a social construct, but rather arise from the innate emotional needs of men and women. Sax also comments on how the pressure to appear beautiful in school is harming girls and young women. He also observes that many of the problems adolescents fall into stem from lacking a sense of self or from defining oneself by a single trait. Based on these and other observations, (and from his 20 years as a family therapist) he strongly recommends parents send their children to single-sex school, and find ways for their children to interact with adults, rather than only with other children of the same age.
Chapters 1, 5, and 7 (Sexual Identity, Mind, and Spirit) are the best for a non-parent. The remaining chapters are probably useful for a parent that isn't familiar with what happens in public school today.
Sax gives strong evidence that ‘traditional’ gender roles are not a social construct, but rather arise from the innate emotional needs of men and women. Sax also comments on how the pressure to appear beautiful in school is harming girls and young women. He also observes that many of the problems adolescents fall into stem from lacking a sense of self or from defining oneself by a single trait. Based on these and other observations, (and from his 20 years as a family therapist) he strongly recommends parents send their children to single-sex school, and find ways for their children to interact with adults, rather than only with other children of the same age.
Chapters 1, 5, and 7 (Sexual Identity, Mind, and Spirit) are the best for a non-parent. The remaining chapters are probably useful for a parent that isn't familiar with what happens in public school today.
May 19, 2020
This is my second Leonard Sax book and his advice really resonates with me. Lots of good takeaways and actionable items in this book, even for mothers of elementary-aged daughters.
February 2, 2021
Excellent book. It was a lot like his other book, Boys Adrift, just the girl version. It was great to get a refresher.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 303 reviews