Connect: Real Relationships in a World of Isolation (Youth Specialties

by Jonathan McKee

"In an age where teenagers are deeply engaged in virtual communities and social networks, they’re still feeling alone and isolated. It may sound all too simple, but the truth is that you have the opportunity to make a profound impact on the lives of students with the simple act of spending time with them, one-on-one. Whether you’re a volunteer or the lead youth pastor, getting some students to open up and share their lives can be a challenge. In this practical book you’ll learn the importance of connecting with students on an individual basis and get helpful ideas on how to engage a variety of students in meaningful dialogue. You’ll explore and learn more about connecting with six different types of students, including: • The “No Way” Kid • The “Not Interested” Kid • The “Checking Things Out Kid” • The “Stagnant” Kid • The “Growing” Kid • The “Looking for Ministry” Kid Connect will walk you through the steps to lead you into relationships with students that go beyond the youth room and impact them into adulthood."

240 pages, Paperback

First published November 24, 2009

About the author

Jonathan McKee is the author of over twenty books including the brand new IF I HAD A PARENTING DO OVER; 52 WAYS TO CONNECT WITH YOUR SMARTPHONE OBSESSED KID; and the Amazon "Best Seller," THE GUY'S GUIDE TO GOD, GIRLS AND THE PHONE IN YOUR POCKET. With over 20 years youth ministry experience, Jonathan speaks to parents and leaders worldwide. You can follow Jonathan on his blog at JonathanMcKeeWrites.com, getting a regular dose of youth culture and parenting help. Jonathan, his wife, Lori, and their three kids live in California.

Reviews

[Jeff · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an excellent book outlining the importance of relational youth ministry through one-on-one discipleship and mentoring. It is also a very practical book that gives a very clear way to evaluate students in your youth ministry as to where they are in their spiritual journey and what is needed to connect with these students at each stage. He also provides practical ways for evaluating one's youth ministry itself when it comes to our effectiveness at connecting with students, and speaks frankly and clearly about the boundaries necessary in one-on-one discipleship between adults and teens.

If I read this book five years ago, I would be jumping up and down for joy, seeing it as an affirmation of what I always believed about youth ministry, and grateful for the new tips and ideas the book provided. But reading it in 2014, I came away more frustrated and angry than anything. Because, as much as Mckee provides an excellent chapter on boundaries and precautions, in the five years since this book was written much has changed. Lawyers and insurance companies have been taking over deciding how ministry should happen. Like all books of this nature, McKee provides many stories as examples of effective youth ministry. I haven't counted, but I would say that at least half, maybe three-quarters of his examples would now run afoul of my denomination's policies in some way.

That's not to say that his examples are bad. I think they are amazing. I agree with the author 100% that relational youth ministry and one-on-one connecting make all the difference in a young person's life. Schools are recognizing this in their mentoring programs. I just came away from reading this book with a sadness that this most effective ministry is being rendered all but impossible today by fear.

[Mafumane Welcome · Rating 5 out of 5]

I read this book and I enjoyed it's fundamental correctness and practicality. I was so inspired that after reading the few pages I could draw my own plan for the Kidz Club and by simply adopting the principles I have connected to our FATLESS team and saw a great increase in the number of Kidz at our club.

[Gregory Stanton · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very informative book that seeks to expand on the best approaches to finding common ground with youth in your ministry. It makes a strong case for one on one discipleship, emphasizing that one on one is the most effective way to form those relationships that lead to being able to introduce Christ.

[Bledar · Rating 4 out of 5]

The six types of students in two main categories is great. Some of the material can be repetitive if you have read other books from him and thus the four-star rating :)

[Gerlinde]

The author provided ways to connect with teens that made sense and followed safety protocol