Ephemera

by Sierra DeMulder

If every experience lasted forever and the sands of time never interrupted our most loving moments, there would be nothing to immortalize in writing.

In Sierra DeMulder's melancholic yet beautifully hopeful poetry collection, Ephemera, she writes with the wisdom of someone who has learned to love and lose. Each poem reads delicately and elegantly, just fleeting memories on the page. Split into 4 sections detailing intimate experiences from the painful deaths of family members who clung to life, to passionate love she feels for her own mortal wife, DeMulder plays a sweet song by pulling on her own well worn heart strings.

While maintaining a muted emotional intensity, the poems keep their grounding in reality, never straying to supercillous territory, perhaps recognizing their own ephemeral quality. DeMulder ruminates on what will come and what will fade. Despite this impermanent nature, you can feel the tender warmth DeMulder holds for her family in every line, even the moments she wishes she could forget.

Genres: Poetry, Queer, LGBT, Adult, Family

80 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2023

About the author

Sierra DeMulder is an internationally-recognized poet, performer, and podcast host. She is a five-time published author, a two-time National Poetry Slam champion, the recipient of a McKnight Foundation fellowship, and the co-host of Just Break Up, a globally popular advice podcast that has been downloaded more than 4 million times.

Reviews

[Genna · Rating 5 out of 5]

First time reader of Sierra's poetry but this won't be my last. There are poems in Ephemera that have stayed with me for days since I have closed the book and that is such a gift, to connect to words in such a deep way. I just attended a wedding and the poem about vows (New Vows is the proper title I think?) left me spinning in the best way. The reality of deep long love - as vows clamour to describe - aches, scratches, leaves marks, is messy and uncurated, and is found in so much more than the twinkling of a person's laugh and the way your souls are twins. Sierra's words throughout this book find those places, through death and loss and hope and life. To anyone wanting more Ephemera too, I loved hearing Sierra perform and discuss the book on her and Sam Blackwell's podcast "Just Break Up" episode 257: To Love Something Impermanent 💜

[J · Rating 4 out of 5]

DeMulder’s collection of poems beautifully explores the intimacies and complexities of life in ways that I did not expect. I really enjoyed how descriptive her poems were in ways that made them uniquely personal and touching. The title of this collection is something to bear in mind, which is that the numerous moments in life we experience can feel like a collection of ephemera, so much so that it brings attention to the fragility of it all. There is as much warmth and tenderness in these poems as there are bittersweet and heartbreaking, which I found incredibly evocative. There are a few different themes that DeMulder explores in her poems, but family—particularly the process of building one (i.e., pregnancy)—is central to this collection. I think many of these poems will resonate strongly with folks who are also working towards building (or already have) a family of their own.

[Lori · Rating 5 out of 5]

I do not say this lightly: this is my absolute favorite book of poems I've read in the past 5 years. I've been a fan of Sierra DeMulder from her YouTube/Tumblr days, and seeing how much she and her work has changed, has been such a unique and gorgeous thing to witness. This book captures queer love, family building, grief, & the rich tapestry that is our feelings -- so beautifully! I am so glad Sierra has returned to poetry, the world really needs her poems.

[Cassie Moore · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sierra was a very important friend for me in high school and I have been so excited to read her first collection since becoming a parent. I found this book exquisite. I loved how the sections were organized and there were so many lines that ripped at my heart. The title poem, Love Poem with Apologies, The Fawn, and 42 years were some of my favorites.

[Tori(a) Barnhart · Rating 4 out of 5]

“Isn’t it intoxicating— the ecstatic briefness of it all?”

[Ebony (EKG)]

Lines from the title’s poem, Ephemera:

“Isn’t it intoxicating—
the ecstatic briefness of it all?”

This poetry book is an exploration of the briefness within this life—love, death, the body. Beginning with the death of the poet’s Grandmother & the loss of her first child, Sierra DeMulder captures the hopefulness and beauty of life and the human condition.

Some poems that resonated with me:
Who Made the Music
Hours Before Dawn
If Miscarriage Was Only a Word
New Vows

themes: love, death, child-bearing/mothering, queer identity, hope

[Grant Burkhardt · Rating 5 out of 5]

I couldn’t wait to read this, and it didn’t disappoint. The best collection I’ve read in a very long time.

[Nina · Rating 5 out of 5]

I won this book in a giveaway. The easiest way to describe it is stunning. Poem after poem is filled with the challenging aspects and life events of womanhood. The poems also delve into the complexities and intricacies of relationships. If you have the chance to read it, please do.

[Ginny · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow!! I normally do not read books of poetry, but the title and cover of this book intrigued me. Beautiful, well written and just full of emotion. I felt like each poem was a chapter in a book and it pulled me into its world and would not let go. The meaning of the cover of the book is discovered at the end of the book and it will touch your soul.

[James · Rating 5 out of 5]

DeMulder's latest contemplates many subjects other poets have tackled but her distinct voice shines through in this strong collection. Her personal experience of marriage, miscarriage, and motherhood bring her poetic voice into clearer focus. It is a pleasure to read a poet who finds happiness as they have often written of heartbreak.

[I received an advanced e-galley through Edelweiss. This book is to be published June 6, 2023.]

[Rurie · Rating 5 out of 5]

beautiful and moving — this touched my soul

I became a fan of Sierra through her relationship advice podcast Just Break Up (which is also amazing and open and tender and all-around incredible!! I love Sam and Sierra) and wasn’t as familiar with her poetry. but I was really moved by the poems from Ephemera that she featured on in the JBU episode promoting this book and decided to pre-order it. I’m so glad that I did.

so so sooooo lovely. pick it up!! you won’t regret it

[Caitlin Conlon]

This collection will speak to both new and longtime readers of DeMulder. With beautiful images and expert storytelling, DeMulder weaves a narrative here of grief, loss, & hope. You can’t help but sink into the words and live them alongside her.

[Kelly · Rating 5 out of 5]

Relevant and true. Now was the right time to find this, feels safer to revisit than - I think - to have read it at the time.

[Molly Quinton · Rating 5 out of 5]

I don't often pick up a book of poetry, but this book stunned me. Ephemera is gorgeous and cutting and unlike anything else I've read lately. I want to return to these poems again and again and again.

[gracie · Rating 4 out of 5]

New Vows was a flawless poem. I absolutely loved it.

[Cassie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sweet thoughtful heartbreak and adoration. A lot of my friends and peers are mothers now and this book resonated with many of the stories I've been bequeathed. Will be sharing this.

[Fiona · Rating 4 out of 5]

"I don’t write in a diary because I am afraid of myself."

[Sera · Rating 5 out of 5]

it is so rare that i find a poetry book that truly resonates and takes my breath away with every single poem. but this collection had me sobbing with tears of happiness and tears of despair. 5/5.

[andrea.f · Rating 4 out of 5]

looooved it 🎐

[mo · Rating 5 out of 5]

4.5/5 rounded up on goodreads

[serena :) · Rating 5 out of 5]

first five star read of the year, and so soon! read this in one sitting. I have never been so emotionally affected by a poetry collection. it was absolutely gorgeous. by the end, I had tears in me eyes and was sending my partner all of the love poems that reminded me of him. highly recommend ❤️🦌

[Elle · Rating 4 out of 5]

These poems, but especially Sacral Chakra, will stick with me for a long time. They're beautiful.

[Erin Clements · Rating 5 out of 5]

Thank you to Button Poetry for the advanced reader's copy.

"Tell her I am afraid, but I am trying anyway. Because what more can we ask of ourselves (now and then) but to race over and over imperfectly against time, disease, famine, heartbreak, freak acts of humanity and nature, only to wake up back at the starting line, salvaged and full of hope." - Sacral Chakra

Sierra DeMulder is one of my favorite poets of all time, her poem 'Today Means Amen' being one of my all-time favorites, so I was overjoyed to receive an ARC of her newest collection from Button Poetry. As she always does, Sierra hit this one out of the park. This is a beautiful collection, an ode to the ephemera of human life, of love, of pregnancy and the early days of motherhood, and of life itself. An ode to both birth and death, -- of hopes, dreams, loves, and actual humans -- this collection is a must-read for all poetry lovers.

[Picture Perfect · Rating 5 out of 5]

I found this one in a bookstore in Seattle ahead of the one I pre-ordered for this June. Completely worth two copies and I'd buy a third just to get everyone I know to read Sierra's work.

[Sam Hughes · Rating 5 out of 5]

Every time I get a mailing from Button Poetry, I get so overjoyed because the collected stories and narratives that come along the way are heartbreaking and emotional, and I thoroughly enjoy their premise.

Ephemera by Sierra DeMulder is set to hit shelves on June 6, 2023, and this book of poetry details the inner working of a family embracing life as a cycle, from the harsh endings of death to the bright, scary confusions of starting anew. With each turning page, I felt myself connecting to each comma, and close of sentence, craving to be held by the maturation of each stanza.

Very well done!

[Cody · Rating 5 out of 5]

True to the book’s tittle, I was finished reading before I wanted to be. Each section uses the least amount of poems necessary, and each poem uses the least amount of words necessary. There is a palpable ache of hanging on that may be adjacent to longing, but the love and tenderness to let it sail away is captured beautifully. Sierra spins a web of stories that link arm to arm points on the map of her life that would make anyone feel deja vu reading, cutting to the heart of feelings with precise language that is both leading and imaginative. There is a resounding “me too” waiting between these pages.

[Paloma · Rating 5 out of 5]

i am honestly at a loss for words.

i am only 19 years old yet i got so much out of this poem collection. i could still relate to around half the poems.

i cried, i cried a lot over this beautiful collection. it’s so raw and vulnerable. i feel so incredibly lucky with the women in my life, they mean everything to me and i will be lending this book to two of the most important to me.

i think that every woman should read this. it feels so important to know your worth and strength and these poems remind you that you can do it.


sierras poems have truly left me speechless. i am so glad that this is one of my first reads of the year.

[machinaheart · Rating 3 out of 5]

I've been unlucky in my poetry endeavours this year. demulder's poetry is gorgeous and I loved a lot of it, but also a huge chunk is about miscarriage, fertility, and motherhood. and while I think it is very important to work with these topics in art, they're definitely not for me.

so, definitely personal reasons and I will do proper research next time I pick up a collection by demulder. something I definitely intend to do, I loved a lot about her poetry and the poems I could connect with - not on those personal no-go topics - were AMAZING!!

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

I am usually not an avid poetry reader, but this book is truly worth reading. Sierra connected many different topics to one theme: the impermanence of everything we feel/experience. Sierra does a beautiful job articulating this incredibly grounding mindset. This book will likely make you tear up, but more importantly encourage you to cherish loved ones and each moment of your ever-changing existence. The only permanent thing will be the presence of this book on my bookshelf! Buy it!!

[kyra · Rating 5 out of 5]

Sierra has become one of my favorite poets, and this book only reinforced why I’m in such awe of the way she captures the human experience. Each poem resonated with me in different ways and I can't help but recommend not only her previous poetry collections but especially this latest one!

And just for the sake of it, the line, "We have built a new astrology — a celestial porch light, a love as simple as a front door" is an absolute gem that stands out amongst MANY beautiful verses.