Confessions of a VAT Inspector

by Dawn Fallon

In Confessions of a VAT Inspector, Dawn Fallon takes the reader on an entertaining and humorous journey through a collection of stories about VAT visits to businesses in and around Birmingham during the 80s and 90s, from multi-national companies to small grocers selling rotting vegetables. Some VAT visits were funny. Some were not. But some were unforgettable. The stories are woven around the author's own work experience as a former VAT inspector. She also details interesting historical facts about HM Customs & Excise (a Government Department which no longer exists), including a selection of photos and images that have never been seen before - from the author's correspondence and other sources.

The author also discloses an amazing VAT check she was taught by one of her senior officers, often revealing significant amounts of underpaid tax without doing much work to find it. The book is further embellished with quotes from selective staff appraisal reports exposing the author's shortcomings and inadequacies (and occasional successes) in a job she never chose or wanted.

In Confessions of a VAT Inspector - the first to be written about work as a VAT inspector - the author details some of the issues about Value Added Tax that could be encountered on a visit, including fraud. The stories detail VAT visits to various businesses including a plumber, newsagent, haulier, antique dealer, glazier, milkman, butcher, farmer, pub, removal firm, and many others, including a large German retailer (for chapter content see below)

The book concludes with the author coming full circle to the job she really wanted to do after finishing her studies: becoming a professional musician.

Genres: Memoir

Paperback

About the author

I was born in Birmingham to working-class parents in 1959. I worked hard at my music studies and obtained a music degree, graduating in 1980. I joined the Civil Service in January 1981 as a Clerical Officer, eventually gaining a promotion to work as a VAT Control Officer. I currently live in Devon and am a hotel pianist.

Reviews

[Sally Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

Who would have thought a book about VAT inspections could be an entertaining read?

Perhaps because it focuses on the amusing foibles of human nature, this gentle memoir is a delight. I thoroughly enjoyed following Dawn, in her regulation high heels, from one quirky family business to the next. From the start, there was a familiar feel to the stories - and then it hit me! They reminded me so much of the James Herriot books. It made me so happy to read, when I got to the Acknowledgement section, that the author was inspired by Herriot’s “It Shouldn’t Happen to a Vet”. This is a lovely collection of anecdotes and mild misadventures.

[Valerie Poore · Rating 5 out of 5]

Being someone who enjoys a puzzle and ferreting out facts, I found this book intriguing from the time I first heard of it. Dawn Fallon has written a lively and entertaining account of what it is to go into people’s homes and businesses with the express intention of checking for VAT fraud. It didn’t come easily to her kind nature and thankfully, most of her ‘traders’ were honest, hard-working souls, even if they were sometimes a bit disorganized. Paperwork stuffed in carrier bags was not unusual, it seems. However, there were wrong-doers and I enjoyed learning how their crimes were uncovered. I also found the whole formal rigmarole of the VAT officer’s job in the 1990s a fascinating reflection of the time. This is a well-written, fun and sometimes, funny memoir that I can highly recommend.

[Ronald Mackay · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dawn’ Fallon’s Confessions of a VAT Inspector a comfortable read by a skilled storyteller.

This is a truly compelling book, not just because it gives us an insight into VAT, how it is collected and because it provides a myriad of intriguing anecdotes about encounters with traders both honest and fraudulent. But also because of the perspective from which Dawn Fallon’s tells her stories. Essentially, she writes as an “outsider” but, and quite legitimately, from the role of the “insider”. Dawn Fallon never longed to become a VAT inspector and admits to never quite getting to grips with the rarer complexities of business accounting. However, if she does not have the heart of a VAT officer, she definitely has the eye of an astute observer of people and a sharp ear for how they express themselves. Hence, she can write this comfortable and entertaining account of a “path not chosen” but trodden, nevertheless, with considerable success.

[Lisa Wright · Rating 5 out of 5]

Before reading this fascinating memoir, I’d never really thought much about VAT inspectors, never mind whether their job was noteworthy. After all, what does a VAT inspector actually do?
Dawn Fallon’s account of her years as an inspector in the West Midlands is both noteworthy and witty. She takes the reader on a journey via intriguing frauds, hilarious characters, and an insight into the suspicious nature of a VAT inspector. The backdrop to this is England in the 1980s, with pink candy shrimps and cola bottles, big hair, and crippling VAT and mortgage rates.
And what does a VAT inspector do? I’m still not entirely sure, but it was fun finding out.

[Chris · Rating 5 out of 5]

I really wasn't sure about reading this book - surely VAT (sales tax) is boring? Well, not boring at all! I really enjoyed the tales of a tax inspector in 1980s and 90s Britain. I'd find it a very daunting job, visiting business premises in an effort to dig up fraud, but Dawn tells a good tale, and meets some colorful characters. And finds some interesting and elaborate scams along the way. The Chinese Takeaway issue is incredible, and definitely gave me a giggle!

[Ellie Hamilton · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved my reading experience of this and Dawn was so lovely to a family member when requesting this book ✨ it had the perfect mix of info and storytelling, so well done✨The humanness really came through; very human and had good humour to it✨Flowed very nicely with sections between visits, her personal life, factual information, research facts and good revelent pictures ✨My respect for the profession has increased with all the knowledge ! Maybe could be cut in places and repetitive phrases but overall very well done ✨

[Lynn Dixon · Rating 4 out of 5]

In Confessions of a VAT Inspector by Dawn Fallon, she takes her audience inside her job as an inspector of the bookkeeping of small businesses in the UK. Though she was a music major, she found herself in this position to pay the bills and stay afloat. Her primary job was to sniff out any cheating or underhanded dealings in these establishments.

Fallon gives us numerous accounts of going into small homes such as those of butchers, farmers and even cleaning businesses. Sometimes, the traders were accommodating and welcoming and other times, they were resentful of her presence. There were times when she had to do the books standing up or in dark, dank conditions, but she trooped on during this stint in the 90’s.

Initially, she was on public transportation, but she went on to get her driver’s license, and later purchased a couple of cars. She did move up the ranks some years hence, before the entire VAT squad was dismantled by the government. Thus, she took her time during Lockdown to write down her memories. Here, Fallon shares many humorous and heartfelt stories of meeting people from all walks of life. A fun read!

[S. Bavey · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was lucky enough to win a digital copy of this book through the We Love Memoirs Facebook group. My review is honest and my opinion is my own.
Confessions of a VAT Inspector contains a whole host of funny and interesting short anecdotes about things that happened during visits to traders made by Dawn while she was working as a VAT Inspector in the Birmingham, UK area.
The traders she interviews, looking for instances of fraud, are shown in all their individual quirkiness and some of the scams they try to pull were unbelievably daring.
I really enjoyed this window into a profession I have never really thought about before, and the characters she met along the way. Dawn fell into this profession by accident and her personality was not obviously suited to it, but she persevered and improved her interview technique and professional attention to detail enough to gain promotion in what appears to have been a very stilted, formal work environment.

[Ruth Dresher-Brown · Rating 4 out of 5]

I selected this book, rewarded by the Facebook group “We Love Memoirs” for a prior review submitted. Being an American, Value Added Tax is not a phrase I’m familiar with, but taxation is definitely familiar. Ms Fallon brought us into her work world from being hired, trained, promoted, and training within the department. I really enjoyed the various episodes that were shared that enabled me to visualize the various trades and vendors that were encountered in the daily routine of the workplace. The senior officers and trainers had unique stories to share that informed her by example, expanding on her own experiences. I found it a very interesting read.

[Judy Middleton · Rating 5 out of 5]

It was with some sadness that I finished Dawn’s entertaining book as I had loved peeking into a world I could only imagine, first, as an American, and second, because this job no longer exists in England. Dawn has a relaxed and kindly way of poking fun at herself and those around her. I highly recommend this absorbing and interesting read!

[Andrea Ricci · Rating 4 out of 5]

As a corporate tax practitioner, but with not much hands on experience on VAT specifically, I found this memoir quite interesting, informative and educational, both from the technical and organizational angle (i.e. from the perspective of Customs & Excise) and from the human perspective (i.e. the mostly honest traders vs the crooks deliberately stealing taxpayers money).

[Sandy · Rating 4 out of 5]

Having traveled to Europe I’ve dealt with paying VAT on purchases and then never having time at the airport to reclaim them. But that was my sum knowledge about VAT so I learned a lot reading this book. And the author’s stories contained enough humor to lighten things up and hold my interest.

[Sandy McKenna · Rating 4 out of 5]

An interesting career.

Dawn didn't plan on becoming a VAT Inspector when she entered the Civil Service in England; however, following an apprehensive start, she soon settled into the position.
In her memoir, she relates some of her experiences; the dodgy traders, humorous encounters, suspicious business locations, along with gallons of tea.
Despite knowing zilch about VAT, I found this to be an interesting read.

[Judy Kiehart · Rating 4 out of 5]

Years back when I was a residential property appraiser I joked about the stories I could tell from meeting people and walking through their properties. Dawn brings my joke to fruition with her book. Even though I am not British and have no knowledge of one’s career as a VAT inspection officer, I was immediately drawn to her story about the business accounts she was hired to inspect.

Dawn’s use of regional dialects--that no longer exist but were commonplace in the 80s--added to the story. If you enjoy watching British mystery series, you will laugh out loud as the characters in her book become so pleasantly real right down to having the kettle on and offering a ‘cuppa’ with every inspector visit. The Chinese take Away story was my favorite, and the plumber was a close second. Some things you just can’t make up!

The technicalities of inspector work were cleverly written into each chapter (many chapters were stand-alone and focused on the business ). Dawn guides the reader to an understanding of a VAT inspector’s job and a tax law background isn’t necessary to enjoy this humorous read. I wasn’t surprised by the number of mom-and-pop (mum-and-dad) businesses that ended up with fines but was surprised that those who knew they were fraudulent didn’t think they’d be caught. Dawn’s detecting abilities and each reveal were such that no matter in which country you reside, you will find the book entertaining and will be pulled into solving the puzzles with Dawn.

[Wendy Leo-Smith · Rating 4 out of 5]

Dawn achieved the impossible by making, to use her words, the most boring job interesting. Each chapter you meet new entertaining characters and it is full of sweet 80’s nostalgia. I am so pleased I was part of this wonderful age.

[Mehsi · Rating 3 out of 5]

An OK read, sometimes a bit long-winded/technical. I did love the visits and see what is up there.

[Natalie · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was an interesting read.

I've never read a book by a VAT inspector before and this was quite eye opening. Even though it was based around the 80's and 90's when Dawn had this career, it opened my eyes to what they have to deal with when working in this business! Just reading about the prices of things shocked me compared to what we way for things now!

It was an eye opener to read about things people thought they could get away with, I am sure it still goes on now, perhaps even on a much grander scale! What an interesting job to do but I guess not for the faint hearted!

Very interesting read.

[Whistler's Mom · Rating 4 out of 5]

What the HECK is a VAT inspector?

It is frequently said that everyone "has a book inside them." Remembering some of the God-awful memoirs I've read (mixed in with many excellent ones) I'd say that sometimes that book should STAY inside! What I would agree to is that every occupation has wonderful stories attached to it. I've read books by doctors, nurses, midwives, real estate agents, cops, firemen, vets, farmers, truck drivers, and people from many other fields and they had great stories to tell.

Americans are most likely to encounter Value Added Tax when they visit Canada. It's just a sales tax collected at the time of purchase. Some items are taxable and some aren't, just like in the U.S. And (just like in the U.S.) there are government employees visiting small, medium, and large companies to make sure they are collecting those taxes correctly and reporting them to the government honestly.

This young (at the time) lady became an English civil servant when her music degree failed to turn into a paying career. After a few years as a typist, she decided to move up the food chain and (very much against her inclinations) ended up in the organization that policed VAT collections. It was a wild ride for a shy young woman, but she came out of it with amazing stories.

Most of the companies she visited were honest, but many were small family businesses without the means to hire a professional accountant. They happily provided cups of tea and homemade cake, which came more easily to them than explaining their strange bookkeeping efforts. Probably the funniest story is the Chinese restaurant left in charge of an English-challenged relative who failed to understand the pricing system. Customers were lining up, but where were the profits?

Then there were huge corporations with elaborate systems and accounting departments, but sometimes even those places were guilty of poor employee training or supervision. It was the job of the VAT inspector to "protect the revenue" that was needed to finance government programs.

The most fascinating were company owners who were knowingly cheating on VAT collection and reimbursement. Some were so blatant the author wondered how they expected not to get caught. Others were so smooth that it took guile on the part of the inspectors to see through their scams.

Eventually, the author married, had a child, and took early retirement. Not long after, the entire service was merged with the Inland Revenue (England's IRS) as part of Prime Minister Major's attempt to slim down government services.

She's a likable person and very open about her youth and insecurities. Most of her supervisors and co-workers were supportive and she grew and matured during her years as a VAT inspector. She's a proud "Brummie" (native of Birmingham, England) and the spirited Birmingham culture plays a large role in her stories. It's a great read.

[john Kent · Rating 5 out of 5]

A good read

A well written book of interest for anyone who has had a vat visit or undertaken one,dawn traces her career with a nice touch of humour and irony.. What is especially interesting is that she has retained copies of key messages. The book follows her successful career in the midlands, sadly coming to an end when she moved to the South west

[Alison Cubitt · Rating 5 out of 5]

Adventures of a Reluctant Tax Inspector

Dawn is all set for a career in music and teaching but decides instead to pursue the certainty of a Civil Service job. She’s lured by stability, a good salary, and the flexibility to choose where to work. But Dawn soon realises that the promises made to new recruits mean nothing when they give her a job as a specialist tax inspector.

It is a testament to Dawn’s strength of character that she faces the challenges of becoming a reluctant VAT inspector head-on.

It turns out the role isn’t just about numbers; it’s about being a good listener, not taking people at face value and detective work. Dawn takes us through her experiences working with diverse clients and their unique workplaces. From opinionated funeral directors to cunning fraudsters attempting to deceive her, Dawn’s encounters range from the sophisticated to the not-so-bright individuals who think they can pass off photocopied invoices doctored with correction fluid–and get away with it.

What sets her career memoir apart is its ability to challenge preconceived notions about her job. And Dawn makes even the most mundane aspects of the work entertaining.

The author’s writing style is accessible and conversational, and her ability to craft engaging dialogue adds depth to her narrative. Highly recommended.

[Cristina B. · Rating 5 out of 5]

The Mystery is Solved in the Details in Confessions of a VAT Inspector by Dawn Fallon. I wasn’t sure what to expect about a civil servant seeking out nefarious tax evaders, but this book is utterly delightful. The author creatively crafts an entertaining, at times suspenseful, often hilarious narrative that makes her job look anything but mundane or pedestrian. Yet wielding such power to assess fines and even prosecute for concealing profits, Dawn Fallon never sacrifices her humanity and humor. And I kid you not, the Chinese Takeaway story was one I had to read aloud to my husband because he wanted in on the hilarious action!

The greatest takeaway for me is being privy to this everyday slice of life in Britain. We’ve all paid taxes we would rather not; we’ve all probably tried to shape the books in our favor; and we’ve all cursed “the taxman” — human nature, I suppose — but Confessions of a VAT Inspector will endear you to one such tax inspector, and you’ll marvel at her keen observations and insights, as well as admire her refusal to fall into cynicism. (Now, on to do my taxes!)

[Karen Jemmett]

Fabulous book self-published by a local writer based in Brixham. Apart from the interesting insights into what it was like to be a trainee VAT Inspector at the beginning of the 1980s, what I liked most of all were the social and historical reflections on that time. Looking back, it seems unbelievable that young civil servants were so poorly paid, given the responsibility they held. I was starting out as a young secretary in London around the same time Dawn started working for HMRC in Birmingham. Although I was also overworked, underpaid and exploited at the time, I had nothing like the personal responsibility she had for a similar level of remuneration. Of course, times have changed now, but it's good to remember just how poorly paid public sectors workers were back then. Well done, Dawn. I hope to see you print again shortly.

[Stephen Malins · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved this well-paced and crafted insight into a world many of us know little about. I enjoyed playing detective along with her to see if each little case study or visit ended in incrimination. Exoneration or court summons?

I was able to follow on with the tax side and Dawn made it interesting and fun. I had no idea that the inspectors received commissions (titles conferred on them, not bonuses).

There were many delightful little touches (and masterful descriptions) of Dawn's Birmingham life and her insights in to her music. Very well written indeed. Thanks Dawn! looking forward to your next book where I hope to learn about those adventures.

[Sharon Hayhurst · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was not my usual sort of book, so was a step outside of my comfort zone. My brain does not cope with anything to do with figures or accounting. But I must say, Dawn’s writing is finely crafted, she knows how to tell a good story that’s for sure. What I enjoyed was the variety of characters and situations she encountered in her job as a VAT Inspector, as well as her humor. It turned out to be a most interesting and enjoyable read.

[CanYouNotPlease · Rating 4 out of 5]

Much better than expected! Fallon has managed to make VAT both enjoyable and interesting. Not super relevant to VAT work today (set mostly in the 80's to late 90's), but definitely worth a read for a look at VAT from the other side. Her writing style and the snippets of various cases without lingering too long on the specifics of outdated VAT law make it a great read.

[Tammy Horvath · Rating 5 out of 5]

A very entertaining book that kept me laughing. I thoroughly enjoyed this audiobook by Dawn Fallon; its engaging story was a perfect companion as I biked along the breezy path. The hours flew by as she thrilled me with the riveting details of her unique job as a VAT inspector. Before I knew it, my ride was done, so I eagerly started another of her books.

[Rebecca · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dawn had aspired to having a career in music but somehow, was lured, by the idea of job security and future prospects, into a career in the Civil Service. I could imagine her dismay at being given a placement as a VAT inspector. Not at all the kind of job she was expecting, and one which she confessed to feeling totally unsuited for.
It entailed visiting businesses of all sorts to check their tax affairs were in order and inspect 'the books' What a job, as not everyone welcomes a Tax Inspector. Dawn writes an entertaining and at times eye-opening account of the ways in which a few folks tried to play the system, while others were so generous and kind with their hospitality.It's a fascinating piece of recent history now.

[Beth Haslam · Rating 5 out of 5]

Ever considered the VAT implications on sheep semen? That’s how this book begins. Instantly intrigued, I had to read on.

The author aspires to become a professional musician and, through a quirk of fate, ends up as a British Civil Service VAT (Value Added Tax) inspector. Little does she know it’s a job filled with surprises.

Dressed in a classic business suit and pointy-heeled court shoes, the author lugs her heavy briefcase into clients’ premises. And they’re as varied as the strong Midland accents of her customers.

From muddy farmyards to the back rooms of tatty shops, shady restaurants and dusty homes, Dawn Fallon tackles complex tasks, often questioning her ability to deal with the technicalities her job demands. As she finds out, many of her clients are baffled by VAT too.

The author’s tales of grappling with accounts prepared on scraps of paper, missing calculations and transactions that don’t make sense are fascinating and often very funny. Are there cases of fraud or incompetency? These are page-turning moments.

This is a terrifically entertaining book. I admired the author’s tenacity in sticking with the job and love her humorous accounts of client exchanges, which often highlight the natural warmth of Midlanders. If there’s a sequel, I’ll be buying a copy!